EMOTIONAL WELLN

3MATTVOLUME XIX. NUMBER 2

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i"tT\ home should be a happy place, or at least a sale/\\ place. Dealing daily with the outside world, with

II \\ its tensions, pressures, and surprises, can be" \-i difficult. The home is a place to come back to,a place to feel free, relaxed, and comfortable. The homeshould be the place where we feel loved and accepted justfor being ourselves. This is, of course, an ideal description of what a home can be.

In truth, home is also the place where our personal conflicts are worked out, sometimes in destructive ways. Ourinternal conflicts may involve issues of anger, power, andcontrol - all of which can lead to verbal abuse. The ver

bally abusive household is usually not a happy place, and,in extreme conditions, it might not be a safe place. It isimportant to recognize verbal abuse when it occurs - andthen do something about it. Fortunately, there arc effective ways of dealing with such situations and making thehome a safe haven.

Verbal abuse leaves no physical scars, but the emotionalwounds can be just as deep and recovery can be prolonged. On the surface, others may see both the verbalabuser and the victim of the abuse as a happy couple,the nicest of people. But behind the scenes there exists asubtle pattern of manipulation and intimidation, unreasonable demands, sarcasm, and angry outbursts. At the onsetof these relationships, everything may seem wonderful.The person who later becomes verbally abusive mayshower the eventual victim with gifts and complimentsand make that person feel like the most important personin the world. Gradually, however, the relationship deteriorates. The abuser's anger and need for control arc projected onto the victim. The victim is blamed for not being"good enough," and the relationship gradually turns into

Kenneth A. De Luca, Ph.D.& Associates, Inc.

PSYCHOLOGICAL. COUNSELING

& EDUCATIONAL SERVICES

Kenneth A. DcLuca, Ph.D. is the recipient ofthe Ohio Psychological Association Award of

Excellence.

We are sincerely committed to assisting persons,of all ages, lead more healthy, happy, fulfilling andproductive lives. We provide services which enableindividuals to resolve and/or cope more effectivelywith problems and concerns that interfere with theprocess of living. These problems may be personalor related to a member of the family, to a significantoilier person, or job and career.

NORTH RIDGEVILLE OFFICECenter Pointe, Suite 5

35888 Center Ridge RoadNorth Ridgeville, Ohio 44039

ELYRIA OFFICE

5329 North Abbe Road, Suite IElyria, Ohio 44035

ROCKY RIVER OFFICE

Westgatc Tower Building20525 Center Ridge Road, Suite 612

Rocky River, Ohio 44116

SANDUSKY OFFICE

2525 Columbus Avenue

Sandusky, Ohio 44870

WESTLAKE OFFICE2001 Crocker Road, Suite 600

Wcsdake. Ohio 44145

Phone: (440) 327-1800 ~ 800-686-0327Fax:(440)327-1533

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