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HowHows Your Emotionals Your EmotionalIntelligence?Intelligence?
Competencies for Enhancing YourCompetencies for Enhancing Your
Effectiveness by Building Healthy andEffectiveness by Building Healthy and
Productive Relationships at WorkProductive Relationships at Work
With Jeff RussellWith Jeff Russell
Russell Consulting, Inc.Russell Consulting, Inc.Photograph 2006, Jeffrey Russell
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2007, Russell Consulting, Inc.2007, Russell Consulting, Inc. Helping Leaders Build and SustainHelping Leaders Build and Sustain GreatGreat Organizations!Organizations!
Learning ObjectivesLearning ObjectivesAs a result of participating in this session you will be able toAs a result of participating in this session you will be able to::
1.1. Discuss the three dimensions of competence at work.Discuss the three dimensions of competence at work.
2.2. Describe emotional intelligence and its role in work/lifeDescribe emotional intelligence and its role in work/lifeeffectiveness.effectiveness.
3.3. Identify the key competencies that enable someone toIdentify the key competencies that enable someone tobe emotionally intelligent.be emotionally intelligent.
4.4. Assess your emotional intelligence on the four EIAssess your emotional intelligence on the four EIdimensions and eighteen competencies.dimensions and eighteen competencies.
5.5. Practice slowing down an Amygdala Hijack andPractice slowing down an Amygdala Hijack and
demonstrate empathy for anotherdemonstrate empathy for anothers perspective.s perspective.6.6. Implement a personal plan for strengthening yourImplement a personal plan for strengthening your
emotional intelligence.emotional intelligence.
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The Three Essential CompetenciesThe Three Essential Competencies
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2007, Russell Consulting, Inc.2007, Russell Consulting, Inc. Helping Leaders Build and SustainHelping Leaders Build and Sustain GreatGreat Organizations!Organizations!
Emotional IntelligenceEmotional Intelligence
Emotional intelligence is the ability toEmotional intelligence is the ability to
understandunderstand oneoness emotional makeemotional make--upup andandthe emotional makethe emotional make--up ofup ofothersothers and toand to
use insight from this knowledge touse insight from this knowledge to
effectivelyeffectively managemanage andand regulateregulate oneoness
own emotions to make good decisions andown emotions to make good decisions and
to act effectively.to act effectively.
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2007, Russell Consulting, Inc.2007, Russell Consulting, Inc. Helping Leaders Build and SustainHelping Leaders Build and Sustain GreatGreat Organizations!Organizations!
Multiple IntelligencesMultiple IntelligencesHoward Gardner proposed, rather than just IQ . . .Howard Gardner proposed, rather than just IQ . . .
Linguistic/verbalLinguistic/verbal
Mathematical/logicalMathematical/logical
Visual/spatialVisual/spatial
KinestheticKinesthetic
Musical/artisticMusical/artistic
IntrapersonalIntrapersonal
InterpersonalInterpersonal
EmotionalEmotional
NaturalisticNaturalistic
Traditional measures of intelligenceTraditional measures of intelligence(academic orientation)(academic orientation)
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2007, Russell Consulting, Inc.2007, Russell Consulting, Inc. Helping Leaders Build and SustainHelping Leaders Build and Sustain GreatGreat Organizations!Organizations!
Why It Matters . . .Why It Matters . . . Academic intellect isnAcademic intellect isnt enought enough
Technical proficiency doesnTechnical proficiency doesnt wint winthe prizethe prize
SelfSelf--management (control) and effectivemanagement (control) and effective
interpersonal relationships made theinterpersonal relationships made thedifference between success and failuredifference between success and failure
Managers/leaders have a profoundManagers/leaders have a profound
impact on the organization that theyimpact on the organization that theyleadlead
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The Four EIThe Four EI
DimensionsDimensionsStrong, Healthy
and Effective
Relationships
The driving purpose ofThe driving purpose of
emotional intelligenceemotional intelligence
and life in general!and life in general!
Self-Management
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SelfSelf--AwarenessAwareness
Knowing your internal emotional/cognitiveKnowing your internal emotional/cognitive
state, preferences, resources, and intuitionsstate, preferences, resources, and intuitions
EmotionalEmotional selfself--awarenessawareness
AccurateAccurate selfself--assessmentassessment
SelfSelf--confidenceconfidence
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2007, Russell Consulting, Inc.2007, Russell Consulting, Inc. Helping Leaders Build and SustainHelping Leaders Build and Sustain GreatGreat Organizations!Organizations!
SelfSelf--Management DimensionManagement Dimension
ManagingManaging your internal emotional/cognitiveyour internal emotional/cognitive
states, impulses, and resources to reach goalsstates, impulses, and resources to reach goals SelfSelf--controlcontrol
TransparencyTransparency
AdaptabilityAdaptability
AchievementAchievement
InitiativeInitiative
OptimismOptimism
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2007, Russell Consulting, Inc.2007, Russell Consulting, Inc. Helping Leaders Build and SustainHelping Leaders Build and Sustain GreatGreat Organizations!Organizations!
What Are Emotions?What Are Emotions?
HappinessHappinessSadnessSadness
SurpriseSurprise
DisgustDisgust
AngerAnger
FearFear
EcstasyEcstasy
DespairDespair
TerrorTerror LoveLove
AnxietyAnxiety
LongingLonging
SelfSelf--worthworth
What are the core emotions that people experience?What are the core emotions that people experience?
There are many more emotions that we feel than weThere are many more emotions that we feel than we
can label. Emotions are fundamentally notcan label. Emotions are fundamentally not
cognitive/verbal, so, as soon as we try to name them,cognitive/verbal, so, as soon as we try to name them,we begin to be cognitive instead.we begin to be cognitive instead.
Maurice Elias,Maurice Elias, Ph.DPh.D, co, co--authorauthor
Emot ionall y Int el l igent Parent ingEmot ionall y Int el l igent Parent ing
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2007, Russell Consulting, Inc.2007, Russell Consulting, Inc. Helping Leaders Build and SustainHelping Leaders Build and Sustain GreatGreat Organizations!Organizations!
EmotionalEmotional PowerPower!!
What I do!
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Neo-Cortex Brain
Our Three Brains . . .Our Three Brains . . .
Rudimentary brainRudimentary brain
Basic functionsBasic functions
Heart rate, breathingHeart rate, breathing
Formed on top of RFormed on top of R--brainbrain
Enabled learning: fight or flight!Enabled learning: fight or flight!
Site of emotions and emotional memorySite of emotions and emotional memory
Formed on top of and around limbic brainFormed on top of and around limbic brain
Core cognitive intelligenceCore cognitive intelligence
Site of working memorySite of working memory
Amygdala Fight or FlightFight or FlightResponseResponse
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2007, Russell Consulting, Inc.2007, Russell Consulting, Inc. Helping Leaders Build and SustainHelping Leaders Build and Sustain GreatGreat Organizations!Organizations!
An AmygdalaAn Amygdala HijackHijack!!!!You know that youYou know that youve been hijacked when . . .ve been hijacked when . . .
Emotions overwhelm your thinking and actionsEmotions overwhelm your thinking and actions
You are thinking and actingYou are thinking and acting against your own wi l lagainst your own wi l l!!
You are unable to accurately read othersYou are unable to accurately read others emotionsemotions
You canYou cant find the right words . . . (stumbling,t find the right words . . . (stumbling,
stuttering when you try to speak)stuttering when you try to speak) You are unable to focus your thinking or actionsYou are unable to focus your thinking or actions
YourYour fight or flightfight or flight response kicks in . . . heartresponse kicks in . . . heartraces, blood pressure increases, sweating profusely,races, blood pressure increases, sweating profusely,uneasy feeling in theuneasy feeling in the gut,gut, clenched jaw, twitching,clenched jaw, twitching,tapping foot, cold extremities as the brain rushestapping foot, cold extremities as the brain rushesblood to muscles needed for fighting or fleeing . . .blood to muscles needed for fighting or fleeing . . .
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The Ladder ofThe Ladder of
InferenceInference
Our beliefs andOur beliefs and
feelings affectfeelings affectwhat we paywhat we pay
attention toattention toYour
YourPathtoAction
PathtoAction
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2007, Russell Consulting, Inc.2007, Russell Consulting, Inc. Helping Leaders Build and SustainHelping Leaders Build and Sustain GreatGreat Organizations!Organizations!
Implications of the Ladder?Implications of the Ladder? Each of us creates aEach of us creates a storystory to help us fill in the details ofto help us fill in the details of
missing informationmissing information
Our stories are informed by history, culture,Our stories are informed by history, culture,misunderstandings, perceived and realmisunderstandings, perceived and real wrongswrongs (or(orrightsrights), and both within and outside of our awareness.), and both within and outside of our awareness.
The stories we tell chart ourThe stories we tell chart our Pat h to Act ionPat h to Act ion the route wethe route wefollow from observed events to the actions we take (whichfollow from observed events to the actions we take (whichmay or may not be grounded in reality)may or may not be grounded in reality)
We take theseWe take these flightsflights up the Ladder because of ourup the Ladder because of ourf undament al at t r ibut ion er rorf undament al at t r ibut ion er ror we tend to view otherswe tend to view othersbehaviors as due to theirbehaviors as due to their dispositiondispositionrather than theirrather than theirenvironmentenvironment
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Success is not final. Failure is notSuccess is not final. Failure is notfatal. It is the courage to continuefatal. It is the courage to continue
that makes the difference.that makes the difference.
Winston ChurchillWinston Churchill
Photograph 2006, Jeffrey Russell
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Be who you are and say whatBe who you are and say whatyou feel, because those whoyou feel, because those who
mind don't matter and thosemind don't matter and those
who matter don't mind.who matter don't mind.
Dr. SeussDr. Seuss
Photograph 2006, Jeffrey Russell
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2007, Russell Consulting, Inc.2007, Russell Consulting, Inc. Helping Leaders Build and SustainHelping Leaders Build and Sustain GreatGreat Organizations!Organizations!
Social Awareness DimensionSocial Awareness DimensionYour awareness of othersYour awareness of others feelings,feelings,
needs, and concernsneeds, and concerns
EmpathyEmpathy
OrganizationalOrganizational awarenessawareness
ServiceService orientationorientation
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Everything that irritates us aboutEverything that irritates us aboutothers can lead us to anothers can lead us to an
understanding of ourselves.understanding of ourselves. Carl JungCarl Jung
Swiss psychiatristSwiss psychiatrist
b. 1875, d. 1961b. 1875, d. 1961
Photograph 2006, Jeffrey Russell
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2007, Russell Consulting, Inc.2007, Russell Consulting, Inc. Helping Leaders Build and SustainHelping Leaders Build and Sustain GreatGreat Organizations!Organizations!
EmpathyEmpathy The ability toThe ability to understand, be awareunderstand, be aware
of, be sensitive to, and vicariouslyof, be sensitive to, and vicariouslyexperience the feelings, thoughts, andexperience the feelings, thoughts, and
experiences of another.experiences of another.
Demonstrating understanding of:Demonstrating understanding of: TheThe meaningmeaningof what was saidof what was said
TheThe feelingfeelingthat you sense that the personthat you sense that the person
was experiencingwas experiencing
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Developing EmpathyDeveloping Empathy Put yourself in the other personPut yourself in the other persons shoess shoes try to see thetry to see the
world from his orworld from his or herherss perspectiveperspective
Seek to understand the pressures, responsibilities,Seek to understand the pressures, responsibilities,expectations, and demands placed upon the other personexpectations, and demands placed upon the other person
InquireInquire. If the other person says something that sounds. If the other person says something that sounds
offoff or confusing, sayor confusing, say IId like to know more aboutd like to know more about
that.that.
Explore his or her reasoningExplore his or her reasoning. Behind every. Behind every positionposition andand
argument is a set of thoughts and feelings that are theargument is a set of thoughts and feelings that are the
underpinning of the position. By seeking to understandunderpinning of the position. By seeking to understandthe other personthe other persons reasoning, it builds a bridge tos reasoning, it builds a bridge to
understandingunderstanding
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Follow the threeFollow the three RRss Respect for selfRespect for self
Respect for othersRespect for others Responsibility for all yourResponsibility for all your
actionsactions
Dalai LamaDalai Lama
Photograph 2006, Jeffrey Russell
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2007, Russell Consulting, Inc.2007, Russell Consulting, Inc. Helping Leaders Build and SustainHelping Leaders Build and Sustain GreatGreat Organizations!Organizations!
Relationship Management DimensionRelationship Management Dimension
Adeptness at inducing desirableAdeptness at inducing desirable
responses in othersresponses in others InspirationInspiration
InfluenceInfluence
DevelopingDeveloping othersothers
ChangeChange catalystcatalyst
ConflictConflict managementmanagement
Teamwork andTeamwork and collaborationcollaboration
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ConflictConflict
Styles . . .Styles . . . Tough Battler
Friendly HelperAvoider
Compromiser
Una
ssertive
Assertive
Degree
ofAssertiven
ess
Uncooperative Cooperative
Degree of Cooperativeness
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Viewing Conflict as a CycleViewing Conflict as a Cycle
The Underlying
IssuesThe "Triggering"
Event
Overt Expression of
Conflict Behaviors
How can you use this model to reduce theHow can you use this model to reduce the
negative impacts of conflict?negative impacts of conflict?
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2007, Russell Consulting, Inc.2007, Russell Consulting, Inc. Helping Leaders Build and SustainHelping Leaders Build and Sustain GreatGreat Organizations!Organizations!
Seven Simple & Powerful TipsSeven Simple & Powerful Tips1.1. Take time every day to appreciate what isTake time every day to appreciate what is
right in the world/your liferight in the world/your life2.2. Increase your emotional word vocabularyIncrease your emotional word vocabulary
3.3. Be your own best friendBe your own best friend
4.4. Listen with your heartListen with your heart
5.5. Talk back to yourselfTalk back to yourself
6.6. Tune in to your bodyTune in to your body
7.7. Smile more!Smile more!
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2007, Russell Consulting, Inc.2007, Russell Consulting, Inc. Helping Leaders Build and SustainHelping Leaders Build and Sustain GreatGreat Organizations!Organizations!
EI and LeadershipEI and Leadership
The emotionally intelligent leader . . .The emotionally intelligent leader . . .
1.1. Commits to coCommits to co--creating ancreating anorganization in which individuals canorganization in which individuals canbe and do their best to achieve sharedbe and do their best to achieve sharedgoals.goals.
2.2. Encourages people to create andEncourages people to create andarticulate a shared vision and missionarticulate a shared vision and mission
that is inspiring.that is inspiring.
3.3. Shares authority and accountabilityShares authority and accountabilitywith others.with others.
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EI and LeadershipEI and Leadership
4.4. Encourages people to workEncourages people to workinterdependently to achieve a shared goal.interdependently to achieve a shared goal.
5.5.
CoCo
--creates a climate in which peoplecreates a climate in which people
respect each other, believe in their ownrespect each other, believe in their ownselfself--worth, and value authenticity.worth, and value authenticity.
6.6. CoCo--creates mechanisms so that meaningfulcreates mechanisms so that meaningful
and wholeand whole--hearted participation canhearted participation canhappen.happen.
7.7. Exercises his/herExercises his/her personalpersonalpower ensuringpower ensuring
that the best decisions are made yetthat the best decisions are made yetrefusing to be treated as or to regardrefusing to be treated as or to regardhim/herself as a heroic leader.him/herself as a heroic leader.
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Sometimes I lie awake at night, and I ask,Sometimes I lie awake at night, and I ask,
"Where have I gone wrong?"Where have I gone wrong? Then a voice saysThen a voice says
to me, "This is going to take more than oneto me, "This is going to take more than one
night.night.
Charles M. SchulzCharles M. SchulzCharlie Brown in "Peanuts"Charlie Brown in "Peanuts"
Photograph 2006, Jeffrey Russell
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Somebody has to doSomebody has to do
something . . .something . . .
the late Jerry Garciathe late Jerry Garcia
(of the Grateful Dead)(of the Grateful Dead)
and it's just incrediblyand it's just incredibly
pathetic that it has to bepathetic that it has to be usus..
Photograph 2006, Jeffrey Russell
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Thank You!Thank You!
Good luck in developing andGood luck in developing andstrengthening your emotionalstrengthening your emotional
intelligence!intelligence!
For a copy of todayFor a copy of todayssPowerPoint presentation, go to:PowerPoint presentation, go to:
www.RussellConsultingInc.comwww.RussellConsultingInc.com
Photograph 2006, Jeffrey Russell