PoetryCollection

ViktorJakimovski(IntroductionbyMarijaMakeska)

ForewordbyMarijaMakeska

ItissuchajoytoreadapoetlikeViktorJakimovski,whoseworkiseasytounderstand,verydetailedandup to thepoint.Hiswork for theOtherWordsProject (aEuropeanprojectsupportedbytheEuropeanCommission)waspresentedandcollectedinthespring/summerof2016 in the Basque Country in order to promote small andminority languages, such as theMacedonianlanguage.TheprojectwascarriedoutinSanSebastian,lastedfortwomonths,andduringhisstayViktorhadachancetoexploretheBasquecultureandtraditions,andtowriteandexpresshimselfinacreativemanner. The following poems are his stand-alone work, and some of them were presentedduring his stay. They are beautiful and interesting to read, andone should read thema fewtimestounderstandwhathe’stryingtosay. “TheColorBlind”isaboutalostmanwholivesascolorblindinhisownillusion. “Your Table is Free” is about peoplewhoweredrinking in thepast together, but arenowseparated,andthepoetisrefreshingthememoryoftheirgoodolddays. “UnderOurSky”isthelightthatstaysonthehorizonafterthedarkness. “BeforeDreams”isthedreamforabetterfuture. “Rain”isametaphorforaraindropthatfallsinthebiospheretobepartofit,tohavehumanlifeinit. “(un)writtenrules”isstartinganewletteraboutlife,andaboutlove. “WhoKnows,Knows”issearchingforwords,answerstoquestionsaboutlife. In “Fortress”, he says thathe remembers someone inhis life thatmeans tohimverymuch,butisunsureoftherelationshipwiththisperson. “You”isaboutsomeonetheauthorsaysthatheorsheis“worthloving”andispartofhisownlifeassomeonewhoisclose. “WeDoGoOn”speaksaboutcontinuingtostepforward,nomatterthecircumstances. In“IfYouEverAskMe”theauthorstandsstillinfrontofsomeoneineternalsilenceonthequestionofwhetherhelovesthisperson. In “Destiny – Dreams” he contradicts himselfwith the positives and the negatives ofdreamsanddestiny. “YouareThere,WhereIam”isthedreamoftheauthorforsomeonehelovesandthispersoniseverywhereinhisconsciousandsubconsciousmind.Thispersonmeanstotheauthormorethanhecouldeverwriteabout,sothat’swhyheneverwritesanything.

THECOLOUR-BLINDSilenceisincapableofoutspeakingthoughtIneverusedcolouringbooksjustbrokecrayonssoIcanprovemymasculinityIsailin-betweentwowavesliveinthreeseasIfeellostintheflightlongtimeagostoppedseekingtheprayIliveinanillusionsocansurviveinmyownchaosmylifeissosimplycomplicatedconsistingoftwocoloursandIbutthecolour-blind

YOURTABLEISFREEPacaya.Whowouldmisswhowhenwaveswouldseparateuswhendayswoulddawnonuswhenshipswouldleavewhowouldcherishmemories?Arkupe!Whatnightswehavespenttherewhattruthswehavedrunkthere!Cursedbetheforeignlandevermorebeauty.You,youwhohaveservedmethetruth,howcanIwriteyouin,inthispoemwhenyouhaven’teventoldmeyourname?Iwouldcallyounoname,letthemcallmeinsanewhencallingyouinsilence.Four-leggedfriendofmine,webothknowtimecannotfillintheemptyglassesorthenewfullonescanbringbackourtimes.Pacaya,Arkupe!Arkupe,Pacaya!Likemeandtruthlikewineandpoetry.

UNDEROURSKYInthislightwelosewordsunderthissky,wecreatestoriestojustifyourexistence.Darknessisourultimatepower,ourgreatestfearourbiggestdelusionthatwhatfollowsisanewlight.Thehorizonmirrorsthetimeweareexistingintoday,allthingsinitareourlittlekingdomwherewealllookforourownfreedom;wherespiritandtimearebutonewhilegraduallywearelosinggripofourbody’sbeams.

BEFOREDREAMSInthenightlyhourswheninourbloodrunmemories,images,emotionsInthenightlyhourswhenwelosethemorninghopingforbetterfutureWhenwelookatthewatchandrelativelycalmlywerejoiceinthefollowingsunriseThen,wedon’tcarewhowewereorwhowewillbeInthosenightlyhoursweonlyliveforthemomentwecoexistwiththestarsandtheMoonAsecondfarfromeachotherandwiththoughtsdelvedintoinfinitywelivethroughthedreambeforeevendreamingit.

RAINIsitasignthatskiesarelonesome?Orbutafranticsupernaturalplayofraindrops–whichwouldbethefirsttoreachtheground?Funny!WereIaraindropIwouldhaveneverlikedtofalldownandbeapartofthechaoscalledhumanlife.WereIaraindropIwouldhavebefriendedthebirdsandelevatedalongsidetheirfreedom.

(un)writtenrulesIwishtostartanewlifeletter.Iwishmydayswereunwrittenpoetryeveryonecanunderstand.IwishmymorningsbeganwithaCapitalletter,andwhennightfallsupervenesanddarknessprevailsspaceIwishIturnedthewalllamponIwishImovedonthreadingnewlovemessagesundermyluckystar.Shouldyou,byanychance,noticeatypographicalerrordofeelfreetoturntheletterover.Thereitiswritten–theoneandonlyproofreaderislifeitself.

ResponsetotheDedicationPage49(WhoKnows,Knows)IfIhadknownthewordsImighthaveprovedtheunwritten…InowfeelemptyinsidelikethewolfinsearchofpreyIsearchforthewordshiddenawaysomewhereinsolitude.Evenrightnow,Istilldon’tknowwheretolookforthem.Perhapsinadifferentworldlifewouldhavecreatedbetterhistory?!Manyquestionsleftbehindus,inthesevaguetimes–wecreateourownlight.Oh,life!Isn’titshamefultoask:Whydidyoudivergeourpathstoosoonwhenweweredestinedtobeone?Evenwhenintwohalvesdivided…

FortressIamtooyoungforgreatpromisesthatwarmyourheartwhilelikeafaithfuldogyouexpectmetomake.Don’tmakemebeafakepicturehungonthewalltobetorndown.Therehavebeen,therewillbe,therearedayswe’llneverforget.Pleasantlyenoughforus.WhilelettingfateplanmylifeIturnedintoafortressattimeslackingyourpresence.

YouYouappearedwhenIstartedtofadeaway,intimeswhenIforgottolove.Youarethereasonthatmakesmehappyanditsspiritjoinedwithmine.YouaretheflowerpoppingoutthesnowthefirstonetofeeltheSun’sheat.Youareapartofmyyouth,amementoforagoodnight’ssleep.Youarethehardestwordtoutteredinthemomentsoftheloudestsilence.Youarewrappedupkindness,sentasapresent,withareason.Youarealittlebitofeverything,allbeautiesintoone,youaresoworthloving.

WeDoGoOnWesometimesmightsteponafieryflamethatwon’tstopburningourfeet.Butwedogoon,sincewithnoheatinsideourlifeturnsintoafrozenstorycloakedinmist,sowecannoteyethebeautysurroundingusoutsidethethickcloakthatnarrowsdownourhorizon.

IfYouEverAskMeIfyoueveraskme:HaveIeverlovedyou,standingstill,simply,Iwouldbestaring.Iwouldbestaringatyou,andinmyheadvariousanswerswouldshafflebutIwouldcontinuestaringinsilence.Indeed…Myanswerisbutaneternalsilence.

Destiny–DreamsWehaveadreamofhappinessbutweliveunhappily.Wehaveadreamoflifebutlifesecretlysummonsdeathclosetous.Wehaveadreamoflightbutlightisbutdarkness.Wehaveadreamofcomfortbutcomfortismoreofadiscomfort!WehaveadreamofParadisebutwearemysteriouslybroughtinfrontofthegatesofHell!Wehaveadreamoffuturebutwehavesoulspoisonedwithmemories!Whydon’twejuststopdreaming?!

YOUARETHERE,WHEREIAMNow,Icannotfindyouamongthewrittenpagesofthepoetry.Thereisnometaphorofyou,but,hey,thebestthingscannotbewrittendown.Theyarenotworthyofbeingdustyandforgottenonshelvesforyearsbyavigorousreaderwhowouldleaveyouassoonashisfriendsaskhimtogrababeer.YouareallthatcomesoutofmewhenIamdrunkandeveryfoolishthingIdowhilesober.Sometimes,youevenappearindreams–onemorereasontooversleeptodayaseveryotherdayandtowishforthedirectortorepeatoursceneonemoretime.Howmanysmilesdoesapersonneedtofeelhappyenough?Whenwithyou,butamomentonlyissufficienttolosemyselfinaneternalbliss.Whenwithyou,pridemakesnosenseandeveryeffortImaketorunawayfromyouevenforamomentbecomesmoreandmorepointless.Youarethepathosthatdoesnotrequirealterationinordertobeanexceptionalpoeticwhole.Youaremyconscious,butI,unfortunately,hardlyeverwritewhilesober.