The Squeaky Clean Legacy, Chapter 17.3 “De Profundis” Part One

Max:A'ermidnight.Andnothinghashappened,asIknewitwouldnot.

Max:Papa?

Secundus:Hello,Max.

Max:But...But...

Secundus:WhyamIhere?Iwantedtoapologize.

Secundus:Youshouldneverhavegrownupwithoutmeandyourmother.

Max:Mamahasdone....herbest,Iwouldsay.

Secundus:Inotherwords,yougrewupwithouteitherofus.Iamsosorry.

Secundus:It seems so unfair that I knew her for so long, and that you hardly knew her at all.  I probably always loved her, before either of us really knew what that meant. 

Secundus:  I had to wait for a long ;me before she loved me the way I loved her.  It wouldn’t have ma=ered, because she was first, last, and always, the friend I loved most.

Secundus:We waited for a long ;me un;l we could marry. 

Secundus:It was worth it.  I wouldn’t have changed anything.  There is no one I ever loved as much as I loved Cecilia. 

Secundus:Except for you. 

Secundus:I never wanted to leave the two of you.  There is only one reason I wouldn’t come back, and that is because I couldn’t. 

Secundus:Ilovedyou,Max.Youhavetobelievethat.AndIcertainlydidn’twantyourlivestobedestroyedbecauseofme.

Max:Mamadoesnotrealizeyouaregone,Papa,ifthatisofanycomfort.Shewaitsforyoutocomeback.

Secundus:Whywouldthatbeofanycomforttome?Idon’twanthertowaitforme.IfIwerealive,Iwouldalwayshavecomeback.ButI’mnot.

She’sstuck,Max.Shecan’tmournme,becauseshewon’tadmitthatI’mgone.

Andneitherwillyou.

Secundus:Max,please.Pleaseletgo.Andthenfindawaytohelpher.

Max:I...Ihavetried,Papa,butIdonotthinkitwilldoanygood.

Secundus:Helpherasmuchasyoucan.

Twolastthings.

Secundus:Whatthefiredestroys,thefirerenews.

Secundus:Andgoodbye.

Secundus:Goodbye,Max.

Telemachus:Nausicaa?

Telemachus:Nausicaa,slowdown!I’llgetGawaine.Justhangon.

Gawaine:Yes,Nausicaa.What’stheproblem?

Gawaine:Sheis?

Gawaine:Shehasn’t?Notatall?Areyousure?

Gawaine:OK.Holdon.Youneedreinforcements.

Gawaine:Knights!Dropeverything.

Gawaine:We’reneeded.

Gawaine:OK,Nausicaa,startover,andwhileyou’reatit,explainwhyyoudidn’tcallmebefore.

Nausicaa:Ididn’tknow!Ididn’tknowitwouldgetsobad.

Nausicaa:I mean, I knew she would cry.  I was expec;ng that. 

Nausicaa:But then she kept saying that she was geFng cold. 

Nausicaa:Elaine?

Elaine:Just...Cold.I’msorry.Can’tgetwarm.

It was scary.  I was scared, anyway. 

Nausicaa:It just made Lenore angry.  Elaine kept shivering, and Lenore got angrier. 

Nausicaa:We tried to make her eat something.  Something warm and simple. 

Nausicaa:But she said she wasn’t hungry.  She just picked at it and then she wouldn’t eat it. 

Nausicaa:And she was so ;red anyway that we told her she should just go to bed. 

Nausicaa:She went to bed, but I’m sure she didn’t sleep. 

Nausicaa:She kept saying “so stupid,” and she’d stop and stare at something that wasn’t even there, and then “don’t touch me.  Don’t even TOUCH me.” 

Nausicaa:And then she’d run right back into the bathroom. 

Nausicaa:She says the whole thing makes her sick to her stomach.  She won’t eat, and anyway, it comes right back up. 

Nausicaa:  She’s been in bed for days.  But she hasn’t been sleeping. 

Nausicaa:She hasn’t eaten, and she hasn’t slept, and she can’t go to class. 

Gawaine:AndI’maskingagain:whydidn’tyoucallme?Rightaway?

Nausicaa:Idon’tknow,Gawaine!Idon’tknow!I’vebeentryingtohelpandsohasLenore,andwe’vebeenwatchingheralltheVme!We’vehardlyhadanysleepourselvesandwedon’tknowwhattodo!

Nausicaa:*snif*

Parsifal:Whydidn’tYOUcallus,Lenore?

Lenore:Oh,I’msosorry.Ithoughtmaybeyou’dratherIwaslookinga'erElaine.Ithoughtmaybeyoucouldcallyourownsisterorcomeoverwhenshedidn’tpickupthephone,butIguessIwaswrong.I’llknowbeYernextVme.

Gawaine:Look,areyousureyoucan’t?...

Palomides:Oh,hi,Ian.

Ian:WhatisWRONGwithyoupeople?

Ian:Shehasn’teaten,shehasn’tslept,andshe’sbeenthrowingupforhowlong?Days?

Ian:Ifyouhaveadoctorinthefamily,callhim,andifyoudon’t,gethertoone,becauseshe’sprobablydehydratedbynow.WhichIshouldnothavehadtotellyou.

Ian:Oneofyouneedstogethertothedoctor,oneofyouneedstocontactheradvisor,andoneofyoushouldhavecalledhermotheralongVmeago.

Ian:Doit.NOW.

PalomidesandParsifal:Um,yes,ok.

Ian:Yourealizeyouhaveeverybodymajorlyfreakedout,don’tyou?

Elaine:...Youdon’tknowhowitfeels.Ifeelso...

Ian:Stupid?

Elaine:YES.

Iknew.Ishouldhaveknown.Everyonetriedtotellme,andhedidn’tlovemeatall,Iwassostupid...

Ian:Don’tevengothere.It’snotgoingtotellyouanythingyouneedtoknow.

Elaine:“StupidElaine.”“SillyElaine.”“Elaine’stoosensiVve.”You’renotthatkindofperson.

Ian:Oh,yes,Iamthatkindofperson.EveryonealwayssaidIwasthemostemoVonallyfragilememberofthefamily.Mysister’snicknameformewas“Gloomian.”

Ian:AndIknowexactly,EXACTLY,howstupidyoufeel.

Ian:AbouttheonlydifferencebetweenwhatjusthappenedtoyouandwhathappenedtomeisthatIactuallycaughtherinbedwiththeotherguy...

Ian:And we happened to have a house full of wedding guests at the ;me. 

Elaine:Ouch. 

Ian:AND you’re already handling it be=er than I did, because I screamed at my mother, jumped into my sportscar and went roaring off. . .  

Elaine:  You?  Sportscars?  YOU? 

Ian:It’sathrillingstory,Elaine.Don’tinterruptit.

Ian:  . . .jumped into my sportscar, went roaring off, and got blind, stupid drunk. 

Ian:Looking back on it, not the clearest thinking I’ve ever done. 

Ian:I did try to call a friend, but she couldn’t pick up the phone, so . . . 

Elaine:Soyougotinanaccident?

Ian:Yes.

Elaine:Abadaccident?

Ian:Yes. Very bad. 

Elaine:I would never have guessed. 

Ian:The scars don’t show. 

Ian:I’mnotheretotellyouyoushouldhaveknownbeYerorbeensmarter.

Ian:I’mjustherebecauseIreally,reallywishOpiehadpickedupthedamnedphone.

Elaine:IjustfeellikeeverythingIknowiswrong.Ifeel...

Ian:Scoopedout.Iknow.

Elaine:Everyonesays“oh,Elaine,don’tworry,”butIfeellikethingsarenevergoingtobethesame.IfeellikeI’mnevergoingtobeallrightagain.

Ian:Youwon’tbethesame.Anyonewhotellsyoudifferentlyislying,ortheyjustdon’tknow.Youcannevermakesomethinglikethatunhappen.

I’dtellyouthatyou’llbeallright,orthatyouwon’tletthisaffecttherestofyourlife,butI’msorry,Elaine.I’mjustnotthatsmart.Ihonestlydon’tknowhowwellI’mdoinginthatdepartmentmyself.

Elaine:Butyoulistened.And–youdidn’ttellmewhatyouthoughtIwantedtohear.

Elaine:Thankyou.

Ian:Later,DramaQueen.Andgotakeabath.YouknowhowIsaidyoudidn’tsmellbad?You’llmakealiarofmeifyoudon’tgetfriendlywithsomesoapandhotwater.

Gawaine:Dad,it’sallmyfault.IsaidIwouldlooka'erher,andIfailedalldowntheline.

Dinadan:Gawaine,Idon’tthinkyoucouldhavedoneverymuch.Youcan’twarnsomeoneawayfromheartbreak.It’sdevastaVng,andyougotherealone.Iknowthatfirsthand.Ihopedmychildrenneverwould.

Dinadan:IhadhopedthatNONEofmychildreneverwould.

Allwecandonowishelpherpickupthepieces.

Penelope:Elaine,we’reheretotakeyouhomefortheweekend.

Penelope:Honey?

Penelope:Taffy just had her ki=ens. 

Penelope:They’re such darling li=le things: Cappucino, Chocolate, and Caramel. 

Penelope:And Taffy is such a good mother. 

Penelope:Don’tyouwanttocomehomeandplaywiththekiYens?

Dinadan:Comehomeandletustakecareofyou,Princess.

Elaine:Thankyou,Daddy.I’llgetmysuitcase.

...Only,pleasedon’tcallme“Princess”anymore.

Parsifal:WHAT.A.CAD.

Parsifal:Whatacad!Whatatotal,uYerandcompletecad.Iamgoingtounseamhimfromtheguzzletothezatch.

Gawaine:Percy?

Parsifal:ShewasOURprincessfirst!She’salwaysgoingtobeourprincess!Howdarehe!

Palomides:WHOA,Perce.

Gawaine:Percy!PERCY.STOP.It’stoolate.

Percy:Itisn’t.

Gawaine:Yes,itis.

Gawaine:WhatisourprimaryobjecVve?It’stohelpandprotectElaine.

Wehavedoneareallybadjobofitanditismostlymyfault.IfdismantlingAnguswouldhelpherandmakeherfeelbeYer,Iwouldalreadyhavedoneit.ButIdon’tthinkitwill.Idon’tthinkElainewantstobe“thatgirlwhosebrothersbeatupherex‐fiance.”IthinkDad’sright.AllwecandoishelpElainepickupthepieces.IfthatmeanssibngonmyhandsandwaiVng,thenIwillhavetoswallowthatdown.

Anyway,thatiswhatI’mgoingtodo.

Parsifal:It’ssVllnotright.Weoughttobechallenginghim.

Palomides:Actually,no,Perce.Knightsdon’tchallengelouts.

Palomides:  There’s nothing in the rules about making a few informa;ve phone calls, though. 

Dusty:Youwereengaged?Youweretakingyourengagementringoffeverydamneddayandyoudidn’tevenmenVonit?

Angus:Itwasn’tcomfortable.Itwaschafingmyfinger,andbesides,Iwasn’treadytotelleverybodyyet.Idon’tseewhyyou’resoupset.IwasengagedtoElaine,notyou.

Dusty:GoodoldAngus.Youhaven’tchangedabit.DiditeveroccurtoyouthatmaybeIdidn’twanttobetheOtherWoman?

Dusty:Youreallyshouldhavethoughtofthat.

Angus:Nottheface.Nottheface.

Angus:Ow.

Angus:Sigh.

Angus:Whydoeseverythingalwayshappentome?

On to Part Two --