What it is, and what it looks like in stressful circumstances.

Post on 04-Jan-2016

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What it is, and what it looks like in stressful circumstances

Who am I, who are you, what are we doing here together?Dr Jonathan Andrews MAPS. Clinical Psychologist.

Work at Christian Wholeness in Upper Mt Gravatt, where I treat people for depression, anxiety and stress.

A husband of but one wife, a father, a friend, a follower of Jesus.

Who are you? You are concerned either for yourself or someone you know.

What are we doing here together? “What is a good way for a Christian to respond to stress and anxiety?”Keep your heart in mind: Control, direction, connection.

Stressed out

Big Brother and Big expectationsWhat is the good thing about having a big

brother?What might be the tough thing about having

a big brother?If the big brother has reasonable expectations

does this make the situation better or worse?If the big brother has ‘extravagant

expectations’, does this make the situation better or worse?

Extravagant ExpectationsDaniel Boorstin (1961). The Image…. We

have extravagant expectations of lifeJono Andrews (2012). We have extravagant

expectations of each other. Expectations that go “beyond the limits of reason or moderation”. PhysicalMentalHeart related

Stress and the impact on the whole person

Heart – “Leb” or “Lebab”Losing that relationship…broke my heartLosing that job….broke my heartHeart: Motivation, direction, value.

The Quadrants

Check your position!

I know something you don’t know

Check your position!• While still a long

way off…• The Father saw him

and was filled with compassion….

• He ran to him, threw his arms around….

• QUICK – Celebrate!• His Child

An answer to longing

You were not the same after that

So what?Lev Vygotsky “An interpersonal process

becomes an intrapersonal one”You have intrinsic value, and your value is born

out of your treatment. Christ died for you. Self esteem protects you from stress and helps

you habituate (Jens Prisner McGill University)Status independent of achievement leads us to

take more risks

Engage

Your Heart in MindControl

Boundaries with others: ClarityAchievable goals from realistic expectations

DirectionSeparationRole: obey or honour or both

Value and Connection: Horizontally and vertically developing and maintaining safe attachments.