Why can’t our employeeswrite better?

Jack E. Appleman, CBC

www.sgwriting.com

Oct. 19, 2004

About me…

• 25-year communications pro• Written/supervised many types of

writing• Writing workshops to different

audiences• One-on-one writing coach• Professor of bus. writing/

communications: FDU & College of Mount St. Vincent

Today’s discussion...

1. Why employees can’t write/how it hurts

2. Planning a writing training3. Conducting a training—with you4. Determining ROI

Johnny & Judy employee fall short…

Associated Press, 9/19/04 Employers say workers need help

“A majority of U.S. employers say about one third of workers do not meet the writing requirements of their position.”

Johnny & Judy fall short…

…lack of training…wrong approach to writing

Little training/wrong approach

• How many years since prior instruction?

• High school/college English syndrome—1,000 words or bust!

• Fear of being graded!• Viewed as a chore

Johnny & Judy’s biggest mistakes…• Don’t take “simple” approach• Don’t get to the point fast

enough!

World with too much info…

…and growing impatience!

Information overload

• 4,000 ad messages a day• 100 e-mails a day • Constant interruptionsDocument better be compelling!

Bad writing hurts….

• Boss/client misses key points• Boss/client gets offended• Boss/client doesn’t read it • Inefficiencies galore—wasted time/money!• Writer loses chance to show leadership

qualities

Bad writing clouds the company’s flow of information

Planning a writing training: identify who needs help

• You may already know some• Survey employees—including

managers/supervisors• Don’t forget executives

Planning a writing training: management buy-in

• Report on level of interest• Explain scope of problem—globally &

at your firm• Identify writing problems with decision-

maker• Explain that program will be customized• Explain follow-up ROI analysisAfter buy-in: promote through

newsletters, Intranet, emails, word of mouth, etc.

Planning the training

• Review list of registrants• Determine number of

workshops—max 20 people• Group by level/department

if possible

Tailoring training to employees’ needs

Choose instructor—involve in process• Review sample documents• Identify trouble spots/patterns• Speak to managers to uncover writing problems

Developing training content

• Core writing skills• Registrants’ deficiencies• Commonly-written documents• New template—e.g. client letters or

performance reviews

Developing training format

Two phases1. Three- to five-hour group

workshop2. One-on-one meetings

Sample training: explain objectives

1. Learn key techniques of business writing.

2. Learn how to apply these techniques to commonly written documents.

3. Identify personal areas of your writing that need to be improved and begin honing skills in these areas.

Sample training: explain format

1. Group workshop2. In-class writing exercises3. Totally interactive4. One-on-one consultation

Sample training: explain content

Core skills• Be clear• Be concise• Use proper grammar• Be compellingParticipants’ specific needs• Use the right tone• Use email properly

Be clear

UnclearAttorney Sue Jones has been heavily involved with many of the top real estate developers in Morris County.

ClearAttorney Sue Jones has represented many of the top real estate developers in Morris County.

Be clear

UnclearThe deadline for getting your mailing out at a lower rate is nearing, toward the end of November, so it would be appreciated if you could provide me with the necessary data well in advance, at least two weeks or so before.e1

Be clear

ClearTo qualify for the lower mailing rates, you need to provide me with the data by Nov. 15, two weeks before the Nov. 30 deadline.

Be clear

UnclearThe claims manager told the vendor last week the terms were changed.

Did the claims manager talk to the vendor last week?Or, were the terms changed last week?

Be clear

Clear: 2 optionsLast week, the claims manager told the vendor that the terms were changed.

The claims manager told the vendor that last week the terms were changed.

Be clear: group items consistently

Inconsistent grouping

I suggest the following:•Scheduling a meeting once a week•Conference calls every month•We need to write reports that provide the status of claims each quartere2

Be clear: group items consistently

ConsistentI suggest the following:

•Weekly meetings•Monthly conference calls•Quarterly claims reports

Be concise: replace phrases with one word

in the event thatprior to the start ofat this point in timedue to the fact thatin view of the fact thathave the capability of

Be concise

WordyThe account manager’s report was carefully illustrated. The document was five pages long.

ConciseThe account manager’s five-page report was carefully illustrated.

Be concise

WordyYou will be advised of our determination of the claim payment as soon as we receive the report on the claimant’s medical condition.

ConciseAfter we receive the claimant’s medical report, we’ll let you know if the claim will be paid.

Be concise

WordyFollowing my review of the Web marketing contract, it is not one that I can approve of at this time, since the terms are not satisfactory. Specifically, we need to ensure that the email database is part of the contract, after which I’ll gladly give my approval to it.e3

Be concise

ConciseI’ll approve the Web marketing contract once the e-mail database is incorporated.

Use proper grammar

• it’s vs. its• principal vs. principleThe principal/principle reason I’m

here is to help improve your writing.

Use proper grammar

• complement vs. compliment• i.e. vs. e.g.The region manager has several

responsibilities (i.e./e.g. management, customer service and liaison with the sales force).

Use proper grammar

effect vs. affectBad weather affects/effects his

mood.Bad weather has a negative

affect/effect on his mood.

Use proper grammar

INCORRECTAs a huge baseball fan, it was easy for Ron to memorize the players’ batting averages. CORRECTAs a huge baseball fan, Ron could easily memorize the players’ batting averages.

Find thegrammar/usage errors• ABC Company has expanded its line of

products, which now include three grades of ink.

• Everyone on your team needs to understand XYZ Company and their mission.

• She received less votes than her opponent.• Due to the heavy snow, the meeting

scheduled for December 6 was canceled and rescheduled for December 13.

Be compelling: active verbs

PassiveIt is our recommendation that John Smith, the account manager, be promoted.

ActiveWe recommend that John Smith, the account manager, be promoted.

Be compelling: replace with active verbs

I need to make a proposal for changes.

All Board members were in agreement.

Be compelling: active verbs

PassiveA decision was reached by the supervisor to deny the claim.

ActiveThe supervisor decided to deny the claim.

Be compelling:replace with active verbs

• We will perform an analysis of workers’ compensation claims.

• I need to call your attention to the fact that the report is due Oct. 27.

• We are of the opinion that the Internet will reduce costs.

• Last year’s results should be taken into consideration.

Are we in agreement that you need to have an understanding of what it takes to write clear and concise copy?

Be compelling: dynamic words

OkayThe latest innovations will help our

company achieve a new level of excellence.

CompellingThe latest innovations will propel our

company to new heights.

Be compelling

DullWe’re meeting on Nov. 1 to discuss the positive results from the third quarter, including record-high revenues, and to recognize those who contributed. We’ll see how we could improve on these results for next year.e4

Be compelling

If it’s good news, convey excitement!

Exciting/compellingGreat news! Thanks to your hard work, we earned record-high revenues in the third quarter. We’re meeting on Nov. 1 to acknowledge everyone who made this happen, and see how we can do even better next year!

Be compelling: write like a journalist

Given the recent decline in revenues, I suggest e-mailing $20 coupons to all stores—a move that could boost sales by 10% in the third quarter.

“Catching plane in 1 minute,tell me plan in a nutshell”

It’s what’s upfront that counts!

Use the right tone

Negative toneI can’t believe the number of screw-ups you’ve all had on the ABC account! This account is critical to us, and we will not tolerate your cavalier attitude. Each of you MUST attend a meeting this Thursday, Oct. 21 at 9 a.m. to review procedures! No exceptions!e5

Use the right tone

Productive toneSeveral serious errors have been made on the ABC account. We must do a better job servicing this client. Let’s meet this Thursday, Oct. 21 at 9 a.m. to review procedures.

E-mail strategies

• Not a Western Union message:

Come Wed. bus 6:15 mis yu.

• Be specific:“I’m available.”“I’m available to meet on Nov. 10.”

E-mail strategies

Change subject line to be specificIncoming e-mail: Lunch to review budget“Let’s meet for lunch (12-1 or 1-2) during the

week of Nov. 8 to discuss next quarter’s budget. I’m available every day except Tuesday. Let me know what time/day works for you and the restaurant.”

Subject line: Meet 11/10, 1 p.m. at Main St. Cafe

Specific subject lines get read sooner

VagueFirst quarter sales report

Says it allFirst quarter sales up 20%/can hire 4 new people

Specific subject lines get read sooner

VagueReport on Sept. Web hits

Says it allSept. Web hits up 15%/ let’s continue ads in NY

dailies

Determining ROI:Can benefit be quantified?

Surveys/discussions—how did writing training improve….

• Writing efficiency?• Quality of documents?• Readers’ understanding?• Writers’ confidence?• Writers’ morale?

ROI

If writing is more efficient & of higher quality….If employees are more confident with their

writing….If readers can better understand the documents…

…then productivity rises

ROI: productivity rises--clear info flows throughout the firm….

ROI

Higher productivity=DESIRED ROI

Writing training works...Invest in it!

Why can’t our employeeswrite better?

Jack E. Appleman, CBC

www.sgwriting.com

Oct. 19, 2004