“Cardinale Van Thuân” International Observatory

For the Social Doctrine of the Church

Life and Family

Pope Francis’s 2015

Teachings

by Benedetta Cortese

“Society’s crisis of values is certainly not a recent phenomenon. Blessed Paul VI, addressing the

Roman Rota 40 years ago, already disparaged the illness of modern man, who “sometimes [is]

wounded by a systematic relativism”, which “disposes him to make the easiest choices of the

situation, demagogy, fashion, passion, pleasure, selfishness, so that externally he tries to impugn

the ‘majesty of the law’, and internally he replaces, almost without noticing, the rule of moral

conscience with the caprice of psychological conscience” (Address, 31 January 1974;aas66 [1974],

p. 87;ore, 21 February 1974, p. 3). Effectively, abandoning a perspective of faith gives rise to a

false understanding of marriage, and this is not without consequence in the maturation of an

individual’s will for marriage.

Of course, the Lord in his goodness has granted that the Church may rejoice in the many, many

families who, upheld and sustained by a sincere faith, in the daily hardships and joy, live out the

goodness of marriage. The goods of marriage are taken up with sincerity at the moment of the

celebration of marriage, and they are pursued with faithfulness and tenacity. Yet the Church is

well aware of the suffering of many family nuclei that fall apart, leaving a trail of broken affective

relations, endeavours and shared expectations”.

“Pastoral experience teaches us that today there is a great number of the faithful in irregular

situations, on whose personal stories the diffusion of a worldly mentality has had a hefty

influence. There exists in fact a kind of spiritual worldliness “which hides behind the appearance of

piety and even love for the Church” (Ap. Ex. Evangelii gaudium, n. 93), which leads to the pursuit

of personal well-being instead of the glory of the Lord. One of the fruits of such an attitude is “a

purely subjective faith whose only interest is a certain experience or a set of ideas and bits of

information which are meant to console and enlighten, but which ultimately keep one imprisoned

in his or her own thoughts and feelings” (ibid.,94). It is clear that for the one who bends under this

attitude the faith will always be deprived of its value as a normative force of orientation. This

leaves the door open for compromises with one’s own egoism and the pressures of the current

mentality, a mentality that has become dominant by way of the mass media.”

(Friday, 23 january 2015, Address to the Officials of the Tribunal of the Roman Rota for the

Inauguration of the Judicial Year)

“Openness to life is the condition of the Sacrament of Matrimony. A man cannot give the

sacrament to the woman, and the woman give it to him, if they are not in agreement on this point,

to be open to life. To the point that it can be proven that this man or this woman did not get

married with the intention of being open to life, the matrimony is null. It’s a cause of matrimonial

nullity. Openness to life. Paul VI studied this with commission, how to help the many cases, many

problems, important problems, that are even about love in the family. Everyday problems so many

of them.... But there was something more. Paul VI’s rejection was not only with regard to personal

problems, for which he then told confessors to be merciful and understand the situation and

forgive, to be understanding and merciful. He was watching the universal Neo-Malthusianism that

was in progress. And, how does one recognize this Neo-Malthusianism? It is by the less-than-one

percent birth rate in Italy, and the same in Spain: that Neo-Malthusianism which seeks to control

humanity by [controlling] its powers. This doesn’t mean that a Christian should have a succession

of children. I met a woman some months ago in a parish who was pregnant with her eighth child,

after having seven caesarean births. Do you want to leave seven orphans? This tempting God. We

speak about responsible parenthood. This is the way, responsible parenthood. But, what I wanted

to say was that Paul VI did not have an antiquated, closed minded. No, he was a prophet who,

with this, told us to beware of Neo-Malthusianism, which is coming.”

(Monday, 19 January 2015, In-flight Press Conference from the Philippines to Rome)

“You can’t have a family without dreams. Once a family loses the ability to dream, children do not

grow, love does not grow, life shrivels up and dies. So I ask you each evening, when you make your

examination of conscience, to also ask yourselves this question: Today did I dream about my

children’s future? Today did I dream about the love of my husband, my wife? Did I dream about

my parents and grandparents who have gone before me? Dreaming is very important. Especially

dreaming in families. Do not lose this ability to dream!

How many difficulties in married life are resolved when we leave room for dreaming, when we

stop a moment to think of our spouse, and we dream about the goodness present in the good

things all around us. So it is very important to reclaim love by what we do each day. Do not ever

stop being newlyweds!”

“To hear and accept God’s call, to make a home for Jesus, you must be able to rest in the Lord. You

must make time each day to rest in the Lord, to pray. To pray is to rest in the Lord. But you may

say to me: Holy Father, I know that; I want to pray, but there is so much work to do! I must care

for my children; I have chores in the home; I am too tired even to sleep well. I know. This may be

true, but if we do not pray, we will not know the most important thing of all: God’s will for us. And

for all our activity, our busy-ness, without prayer we will accomplish very little.

Resting in prayer is especially important for families. It is in the family that we first learn how to

pray. Don’t forget: the family that prays together stays together! This is important. There we come

to know God, to grow into men and women of faith, to see ourselves as members of God’s greater

family, the Church. In the family we learn how to love, to forgive, to be generous and open, not

closed and selfish. We learn to move beyond our own needs, to encounter others and share our

lives with them. That is why it is so important to pray as a family! So important! That is why

families are so important in God’s plan for the Church! To rest in the Lord is to pray. To pray

together as a family.”

“Next, rising with Jesus and Mary. Those precious moments of repose, of resting with the Lord in

prayer, are moments we might wish to prolong. But like Saint Joseph, once we have heard God’s

voice, we must rise from our slumber; we must get up and act (cf. Rom 13:11). In our families, we

have to get up and act! Faith does not remove us from the world, but draws us more deeply into

it. This is very important! We have to be deeply engaged with the world, but with the power of

prayer. Each of us, in fact, has a special role in preparing for the coming of God’s kingdom in our

world.

Just as the gift of the Holy Family was entrusted to Saint Joseph, so the gift of the family and its

place in God’s plan is entrusted to us. Like Saint Joseph. The gift of the Holy Family was entrusted

to Saint Joseph so that he could care for it. Each of you, each of us – for I too am part of a family –

is charged with caring for God’s plan. The angel of the Lord revealed to Joseph the dangers which

threatened Jesus and Mary, forcing them to flee to Egypt and then to settle in Nazareth. So too, in

our time, God calls upon us to recognize the dangers threatening our own families and to protect

them from harm.

Let us be on guard against colonization by new ideologies. There are forms of ideological

colonization which are out to destroy the family. They are not born of dreams, of prayers, of

closeness to God or the mission which God gave us; they come from without, and for that reason I

am saying that they are forms of colonization. Let’s not lose the freedom of the mission which God

has given us, the mission of the family. Just as our peoples, at a certain moment of their history,

were mature enough to say “no” to all forms of political colonization, so too in our families we

need to be very wise, very shrewd, very strong, in order to say “no” to all attempts at an

ideological colonization of our families. We need to ask Saint Joseph, the friend of the angel, to

send us the inspiration to know when we can say “yes” and when we have to say “no”.

The pressures on family life today are many. Here in the Philippines, countless families are still

suffering from the effects of natural disasters. The economic situation has caused families to be

separated by migration and the search for employment, and financial problems strain many

households. While all too many people live in dire poverty, others are caught up in materialism

and lifestyles which are destructive of family life and the most basic demands of Christian

morality. These are forms of ideological colonization. The family is also threatened by growing

efforts on the part of some to redefine the very institution of marriage, by relativism, by the

culture of the ephemeral, by a lack of openness to life.

I think of Blessed Paul VI. At a time when the problem of population growth was being raised, he

had the courage to defend openness to life in families. He knew the difficulties that are there in

every family, and so in his Encyclical he was very merciful towards particular cases, and he asked

confessors to be very merciful and understanding in dealing with particular cases. But he also had

a broader vision: he looked at the peoples of the earth and he saw this threat of families being

destroyed for lack of children. Paul VI was courageous; he was a good pastor and he warned his

flock of the wolves who were coming. From his place in heaven, may he bless this evening!

Our world needs good and strong families to overcome these threats! The Philippines needs holy

and loving families to protect the beauty and truth of the family in God’s plan and to be a support

and example for other families. Every threat to the family is a threat to society itself. The future of

humanity, as Saint John Paul II often said, passes through the family (cf. Familiaris Consortio, 85).

The future passes through the family. So protect your families! Protect your families! See in them

your country’s greatest treasure and nourish them always by prayer and the grace of the

sacraments. Families will always have their trials, but may you never add to them! Instead, be

living examples of love, forgiveness and care. Be sanctuaries of respect for life, proclaiming the

sacredness of every human life from conception to natural death. What a gift this would be to

society, if every Christian family lived fully its noble vocation! So rise with Jesus and Mary, and set

out on the path the Lord traces for each of you.”

“When families bring children into the world, train them in faith and sound values, and teach them

to contribute to society, they become a blessing in our world. Families can become a blessing for

all of humanity! God’s love becomes present and active by the way we love and by the good works

that we do. We extend Christ’s kingdom in this world. And in doing this, we prove faithful to the

prophetic mission which we have received in baptism.

During this year which your bishops have set aside as the Year of the Poor, I would ask you, as

families, to be especially mindful of our call to be missionary disciples of Jesus. This means being

ready to go beyond your homes and to care for our brothers and sisters who are most in need. I

ask you especially to show concern for those who do not have a family of their own, in particular

those who are elderly and children without parents. Never let them feel isolated, alone and

abandoned, but help them to know that God has not forgotten them. Today I was very moved

when, after Mass, I visited a home for children without families. How many people work in the

Church to make that home a family! This is what it means, in a prophetic sense, to build a family.

You may be poor yourselves in material ways, but you have an abundance of gifts to offer when

you offer Christ and the community of his Church. Do not hide your faith, do not hide Jesus, but

carry him into the world and offer the witness of your family life!”

(Friday, 16 January 2015, Meeting with Families)

“A fundamental role in the renewal of society is played, of course, by the family and especially by

young people. A highlight of my visit will be my meetings with families and with young people here

in Manila. Families have an indispensable mission in society. It is in the family that children are

trained in sound values, high ideals and genuine concern for others. But like all God’s gifts, the

family can also be disfigured and destroyed. It needs our support. We know how difficult it is for

our democracies today to preserve and defend such basic human values as respect for the

inviolable dignity of each human person, respect for the rights of conscience and religious

freedom, and respect for the inalienable right to life, beginning with that of the unborn and

extending to that of the elderly and infirm. For this reason, families and local communities must be

encouraged and assisted in their efforts to transmit to our young the values and the vision which

can help bring about a culture of integrity – one which honors goodness, truthfulness, fidelity and

solidarity as the firm foundation and the moral glue which holds society together.”

(Friday, 16 January 2015, Meeting with Authorities and the Diplomatic Corps)

“The cooperative movement can play an important role in sustaining, facilitating and also

encouraging the life of families. Realizing conciliation, or better perhaps, harmonization between

work and family, is a task you have already begun and which you must increasingly achieve. Doing

this also means helping women fully develop themselves within their vocation and bring their own

talents to fruition. Women free to be leaders, both in business and in the family! I know well that

cooperatives already offer so many services and so many organizational formulae, akin to national

health services, to meet the needs of everyone, of children and the elderly in particular, from day-

care centres to home care. This is our way to manage the common goods, those goods that must

not be the property of only the few and must not seek speculative purposes.”

(Saturday, 28 February 2015, Address to Representatives of the Confederation of Italian

Cooperatives)

““Generativity” as a symbolic code. It directs an intense gaze upon all mothers, and broadens the

horizon of the transmission and protection of life — not limited to the biological sphere — which

can be summarized with four phrases: desire, bring into the world, care for and let go.

In this ambit, I note and I encourage the contribution of so many women who work within the

family, in the areas of teaching the faith, pastoral work, schooling, but also in social, cultural and

economic structures. You women know how to embody the tender face of God, his mercy, which

is translated into a willingness to give time rather than to occupy space, to welcome rather than to

exclude. In this sense, I like to describe the feminine dimension of the Church as the welcoming

womb which regenerates life.”

“The irreplaceable role of the woman in the family cannot be forgotten. The qualities of delicacy,

particular sensitivity and tenderness, which enriches the feminine soul, represent no only a

genuine strength for the life of the family, to illuminate a climate of serenity and harmony, but

also a reality without which the human vocation would be unattainable.”

(Saturday, 7 February 2015, Address to Participants in the Plenary Assembly of the Pontifical

Council for Culture)

“There are various reasons why we are seeing, also in Africa, a trend towards the breakdown of

the family. In response, the Church is called to evaluate and encourage every initiative to

strengthen the family, which is the real source of all forms of fraternity and the foundation and

primary way of peace (cf. John Paul II, Message for the XXVII World Day of Peace , 1 January 1994).

More recently, many priests, men and women religious as well as members of the lay faithful have

admirably taken responsibility for the care of families, with a special concern for the elderly, the

sick and the handicapped.”

(Saturday, 7 February 2015, Address to representatives of the Symposium of Episcopal Conferences

of Africa and Madagascar)

“As you know, in this period the entire Church is committed to a journey of reflection on the

family, on its beauty, its value, and the challenges it is called to face in our time. I encourage you,

too, as Pastors, to make your contribution to this great work of discernment, and most of all to

attend to the pastoral care of the family, in order that married couples may feel the closeness of

the Christian community and may be helped not to conform to the mentality of this world but to

be transformed by continual renewal in the Spirit of the Gospel (cf. Rom 12:2). Indeed, your

country, which has now become a full member of the European Union, is also exposed to the

influx of ideologies that would like to introduce factors which destabilize the family, the result of a

misunderstood sense of personal freedom. Lithuania’s centuries-old traditions in this regard will

help you to respond to these challenges, in accordance with reason and in accordance with faith.”

(Monday, 2 February 2015, address to the Bishops of the Episcopal Conference of Lithuania )

“Palliative care is an expression of the truly human attitude of taking care of one another,

especially of those who suffer. It is a testimony that the human person is always precious, even if

marked by illness and old age. Indeed, the person, under any circumstances, is an asset to

him/herself and to others and is loved by God.”

“Today “to honour” could also be translated as the duty to have the utmost respect and to take

care of those who, due to their physical or social condition, may be left to die or “made to die”. All

of medicine has a special role within society as a witness to the honour that we owe to the elderly

person and to each human being. Evidence and effectiveness cannot be the only criteria that

govern physicians’ actions, nor can health system regulations and economic profits. A state cannot

think about earning with medicine. On the contrary, there is no duty more important for a society

than that of safeguarding the human person.”

“Thus I appreciate your scientific and cultural commitment to ensuring that palliative care may

reach all those who need it. I encourage professionals and students to specialize in this type of

assistance which is no less valuable for the fact that it “is not life-saving”. Palliative care

accomplishes something equally important: it values the person. I exhort all those who, in various

ways, are involved in the field of palliative care, to practice this task keeping the spirit of service

intact and remembering that all medical knowledge is truly science, in its noblest significance, only

if used as aid in view of the good of man, a good which is never accomplished “against” the life

and dignity of man.

It is this ability to serve life and the dignity of the sick, also when they are old, that is the true

measure of medicine and society as a whole. I repeat St John Paul II’s appeal: “respect, protect,

love and serve life, every human life! Only in this direction will you find justice, development, true

freedom, peace and happiness! (ibid., n. 5).”

(Thursday, 5 March 2015, Address to Participants in the Plenary of the Pontifical Academy for Life)

“Second, the apostolic priority directs you towards pastoral care of the family, in the line of

deepening upon the last Synod of Bishops. I encourage you to help diocesan communities in caring

for the family, the vital cell of society, and in accompanying engaged couples toward marriage. At

the same time, you can collaborate in welcoming those who are, so to speak, “distant”: among

them there are many separated persons, suffering from the failure of their plan for married life, as

well as other situations of family unrest, which can make even the journey of faith and the life of

the Church tiresome.”

(Thursday, 30 April 2015, Address to the Community of Christian life (CVX) – Missionary Students'

League of Italy)

“I am thinking in particular of the main challenges to the family to which the next Synod in Rome

will seek to respond. I thank you for your prayers in this respect, and for your prayers for me; I also

thank you for the programme you have planned with your dioceses, in order to take part in this

most important reflection. I cannot but encourage you to continue with determination the efforts

undertaken to support families, in their faith as well as in their daily life. I know that the pastoral

care of marriage is still difficult, bearing in mind the actual, social and cultural situation of your

people. One must never become discouraged, however, but persevere without pausing, so that

the family the Catholic Church defends is a reality wanted by God; it is a gift of God that brings to

people as well as to societies: joy, peace, stability, happiness. What is at stake is important, since,

the family is the basic cell both of society and of the Church, it is within it that the human and

authentic Gospel values are passed on: “the educational mission of the Christian family [is] a true

ministry through which the Gospel is transmitted and radiated, so that family life itself becomes an

itinerary of faith and ... a school of following Christ” (Familiaris Consortio, n. 39).”

(Monday, 27 April 2015, Address to the Bishops of the Episcopal Conference of Benin)

“I think too of Christian families fragmented due to employment far away from home, or because

of separation or divorce. I urge you to continue offering them help and guidance. Be of fresh

resolve in preparing couples for Christian matrimony, and in constantly sustaining families by

offering generously the Church’s Sacraments – ensuring in a particular way that the Sacrament of

mercy is widely available. I thank you for your efforts in promoting healthy family life in the face of

distorted views that emerge in contemporary society. May we all help to form families who can be

purveyors of peace in the world; for “the family is the best setting for learning and applying the

culture of forgiveness, peace and reconciliation” (ibid., 43).

From healthy families will come numerous priestly vocations, families where men have learned “to

love inasmuch as they [have been] unconditionally loved... [having learned] respect... justice... the

role of authority expressed by parents [and] loving concern for the members who are weaker”

(ibid., 42-43). The children of such families will more readily be open to a life of unconditional

service to the family of the Church.”

(Friday, 24 April 2015, Address to the Bishops of Namibia and Lesotho)

“Your service in support of the human person is important and encouraging. Indeed the protection

and promotion of life is a fundamental duty, even more so in a society marked by the negative

logic of waste. For this reason, I see your Association as hands which reach out to other hands and

support life.

It is a demanding challenge, in which you are guided by the principles of openness, of attention, of

closeness to people in their actual situations. This is excellent. Clasped hands not only guarantee

solidarity and balance, but also transmit human warmth.

In order to protect the person you focus your attention on two basic actions: going out in order to

encounter and encountering in order to support. The reciprocal energy of this movement moves

from the centre toward the peripheries. Christ is at the centre. And from this centrality you direct

yourselves toward the the various conditions of human life.

The love of Christ urges us (cf. 2 Cor 5:14) to make ourselves the servants of the small ones and of

the old, of every man and every woman, whose the primordial right to life is to be recognized and

protected. The existence of the human person, to whom you dedicate your solicitude, is also your

founding principal; it is life in its unfathomable depth which originates and accompanies all

scientific progress; it is the miracle of life which always places in crisis any form of scientific

presumption, restoring primacy to wonder and beauty. Thus Christ, who is the light of mankind

and of the world, lights the way so that science may always be a knowledge at the service of life.

When this light falters, when the knowledge forgets the contact with life, it becomes infertile. For

this reason, I invite you to keep your gaze fixed on the sacredness of each human person, so that

science may truly be at the service of mankind, and not mankind at the service of science.

Using a magnifying glass, scientific reflection pauses to analyze certain details. Thanks to this

analytical capacity too, we reaffirm that a just society recognizes as primary the right to life from

conception to its natural end. I would like us, however, to go further, and to think carefully about

the time that joins the beginning with the end. Therefore, in recognizing the inestimable value of

human life, we must also reflect on how we use it. Life is first and foremost a gift. But this reality

generates hope and future if it is enlivened by fruitful bonds, by familial and social relationships

which open new prospects.

The level of progress in a society is measured by its capacity to safeguard life, above all in its most

fragile stages, more than by the spread of technological instruments. When we speak of mankind,

we must never forget the various attacks on the sacredness of human life. The plague of abortion

is an attack on life. Allowing our brothers and sisters to die on boats in the strait in Sicily is an

attack on life. Dying on the job because the minimum safety standards are not respected is an

attack on life. Death from malnutrition is an attack on life. Terrorism, war, violence; so is

euthanasia. Loving life means always taking care of the other, wanting the best for him, cultivating

and respecting her transcendent dignity.

Dear friends, I encourage you to launch again a renewed culture of life, able to instill networks of

trust and reciprocity and to offer horizons of peace, mercy and communion. Do not be afraid to

undertake a fruitful dialogue with the entire world of science, also with those who, although not

professing to be believers, are open to the mystery of human life.”

(Saturday, 30 May 2015, Address to Participants in the Meeting sponsored by the Science and Life

Association)

“Marriage and family are experiencing a series of cultural crises. This does not mean that they

have lost their importance, but that their need is felt even more. The family is the place where one

learns to live side by side in difference, to forgive and to experience forgiveness, and it is where

parents pass on values and especially faith to their children. Marriage “viewed as a form of mere

emotional satisfaction” ceases to be an “indispensable contribution to society” (cf. Evangelii

Gaudium, n. 66). In this now approaching Jubilee of Mercy, do not disregard the work of

matrimonial and familial reconciliation as a benefit of peaceful coexistence: “Hence there is urgent

need of a broad catechetical effort regarding the Christian ideal of conjugal communion and family

life, including a spirituality of fatherhood and motherhood. Greater pastoral attention must be

given to the role of men as husbands and fathers, as well as to the responsibility which they share

with their wives for their marriage, the family and the raising of their children” (Ecclesia in

America, n. 46). Let us continue to present the beauty of Christian matrimony: “to marry in the

Lord” is an act of faith and of love, in which the spouses, through their free consent, become a

means of passing on the blessing and grace of God for the Church and society.”

“Without taking into account the guidance that parents and the Church wish to give to the

formation of the younger generations, the civil legislation tends to replace religious teaching in

schools with an education on religious facts of a multi-confessional nature or with the mere

illustration of religious ethics and culture. Those employed in this service and in this educational

mission must have a vigilant and courageous approach so that education “is given in all schools in

accordance with the moral and religious principles of the family” (Gravissimum Educationis, n. 7).

It is important to offer children and young people catechetical teaching consistent with the truth

that we received from Christ, Word of the Father.”

(Thursday, 28 May 2015, Address to the Bishops of the Episcopal Conference of the Dominican

Republic)

“My attention goes finally to the families, who are the first victims of violence and who are too

often destabilized or destroyed because of the estrangement of a member, bereavement, poverty,

discord and separation. I express my closeness and affection to them. Not only are families the

privileged place for the proclamation of the faith, the practice of Christian virtues, and the cradle

of numerous priestly and religious vocations, but they are also settings “for learning and applying

the culture of forgiveness, peace and reconciliation” (Africae Munus, n. 43) of which your country

is in such great need. It is of primary importance that the family be protected and defended “so

that it may offer society the service expected of it, that of providing men and women capable of

building a social fabric of peace and harmony” (ibid.). I cannot but encourage you to give marriage

all the pastoral care and attention it deserves, and not to be discouraged in face of resistance

caused by cultural traditions, human weakness or the new ideological colonization that is

spreading everywhere. I also thank you for your participation in the work of the Synod that will be

held in Rome next October, and I ask you for your prayers for this intention.”

(Friday, 15 May 2015, Address to the Bishops of the Episcopal Conference of the Central African

Republic)

“I know that you practice this solicitude by asking your dioceses to participate in the preparatory

reflections for the Synod of Bishops on the Family, which will meet next October in Rome. It is

important that the positive aspects of the family in Africa are expressed and understood. In

particular, the African family is receptive to life, it respects and takes into account the elderly.

Therefore, this heritage must be preserved and serve as an example and as encouragement for

others. The Sacrament of Marriage is a pastoral reality that is well received in your country, even if

obstacles of a cultural and legal order still subsist, impeding certain spouses from fulfilling their

desire to found their married life on faith in Christ. I encourage you to persevere in your efforts to

support families in their difficulties, especially through education and social works, and to prepare

couples for the demanding but magnificent commitments of Christian marriage. Togo is not

exempt from today’s widespread ideological and media attacks, which propose models of union

and families incompatible with the Christian faith. I am aware of your vigilance in the matter, as

well as the efforts you make, especially in the field of mass media.

However, one of the keys that must enable you to face the challenges that present themselves to

your communities and your societies is certainly educating the youth. The Church — Family of God

in Togo has chosen to be close to children and young people, who benefit from a good human and

religious formation through numerous projects and initiatives. I am well aware of the considerable

efforts, both human and material, which are represented at all levels. I warmly thank all those who

work in this educational endeavour, which is so important for the future — I am thinking in

particular of the catechists whose involvement is considerable. May they always find in you the

necessary encouragement and incentive. It is of the utmost importance that young people learn to

live their faith in a coherent way, in order to be able to witness with authenticity, and contribute

to a more just and supportive society.”

(Monday, 11 May 2015, Address to the Bishops of the Episcopal Conference of Togo, )

“It is beneficial that in these recent years the reflections of your Conference have been centred on

the mission of the laity in the Church and in society. Here I would like to commend their relevant

contribution to the work of evangelization. It is important that your pastoral care help their

movements of spirituality and apostolate to rediscover and affirm the actual vocation in view of

the “credible lay witnesses to the saving truth of the Gospel, its power to purify and transform

human hearts, and its fruitfulness for building up the human family in unity, justice and peace”

(Address to the Leaders of the Apostolate of the Laity, Korea, 16 August 2014). The laity in fact

need to be accompanied and to be formed in witnessing the Gospel in socio-political spheres,

which constitute their specific fields of the apostolate (cf. Apostolicam Actuositatem, nn. 4, 7). The

pastoral care of the family is an integral part of this accompaniment. The reservations of the

faithful to Christian marriage reveal the necessity for a deep evangelization, which entails not only

the inculturation of the faith, but also the evangelization of traditions and of the local culture (cf.

Africae Munus, nn. 36-38). In this regard, I would like to thank you for the contribution of your

Dioceses to the Synod of Bishops on the Family. You will not fail to benefit from it so as to better

adapt your pastoral care to local realities”

(Monday, 4 May 2015, address to the Bishops of the Episcopal Conference of Congo )

“In October we will hold a Synod on the Family, to help families rediscover the beauty of their

vocation and be faithful to it. Jesus’ words are lived in the family: “Greater love has no man than

this, that a man lay down his life for his friends” (Jn 15:13). With your conjugal relationship,

exercising your fatherhood and motherhood, you give your life and are proof that it is possible to

live out the Gospel. Living out the Gospel is possible and it brings happiness. And this is the proof,

but it is done in the family. This evening I would like to reflect with you on some simple words that

express the mystery of your being parents. I don’t know if I will succeed in saying all that I wish to

say, but I would at least like to speak of vocation, communion and mission.

The first word is vocation. St Paul wrote that all fatherhood stems from God (cf. Eph 3:15) and we

can add all motherhood. We are all children, but to become a father and mother is a call from

God! It is a call from God; it is a vocation. God is eternal love, who gives himself ceaselessly and

calls us into existence. However, it is a mystery which Providence willed to entrust in particular to

man and woman, called to love one another totally and without reservation, cooperating with God

in this life and transmitting life to their children. The Lord has chosen you to love one another and

to transmit life. These two things are the vocation of parents. This is a most beautiful call because

it enables us to be, in an altogether special way, in the image and likeness of God. To become a

father and mother truly means to be completely fulfilled, because it is to become similar to God.

This is not said in the newspapers, it is not shown, but it is the truth of love. To become a father

and mother makes us much more similar to God.

As parents you are called to remind all the baptized that each one, albeit in different ways, is

called to be a father or mother. A priest, a Sister, a catechist is also called to spiritual paternity and

maternity. In fact, a man and woman choose to build a family because God calls them after having

them experience the beauty of love. Not the beauty of passion, not the beauty, perhaps, of a

passing enthusiasm but the beauty of love! And this should be discovered every day, every day.

God calls men and women to be parents who believe in love, who believe in its beauty. I would

like to ask you, but don’t answer, please: do you believe in the beauty of love? Do you believe in

the greatness of love? Do you have faith in this? Do you have faith? This is a daily faith. Love is

good even when parents quarrel; it is good because in the end they make peace. It’s so good to

make peace after a war! It’s so good. The beauty of conjugal love is so great that not even the

greatest of life’s hardships should be able to blacken it.

A child once said to me: “How lovely, my parents gave each other a kiss!” It’s lovely for a child to

see his or her father and mother kiss — a beautiful testimony.

Dear parents, your children need to discover, to see in your life the beauty of loving one another.

Don’t ever forget that your children are always watching you. Do you remember that film of some

20 years ago that was called “The Children are watching us”? Children watch. They watch closely

and when they see that daddy and mommy love each other, the children grow up in that

atmosphere of love and happiness as well as security, because they are not afraid: they know they

are safe in the love of their father and mother. I might add an awful thing. Let us think how much

children suffer when they see their father and mother shout at one another, insult one another,

even hit one another on a daily basis. But, dad and mum, when you fall into these sins, do you

realize that the first victims are in fact your children, your very own flesh and blood? It’s an awful

thing to think of, but it is a reality.... Children watch us. They don’t only look at you when you are

teaching them something. They look at you when you speak to each other, when you come home

from work, when you invite your friends over, when you are resting. They try to grasp from your

eyes, from your words, from your gestures, if you are happy being parents, if you are happy being

husband and wife, if you believe that goodness exists in the world. They scrutinize you — they

don’t just watch you, they scrutinize you — to see if it’s possible to be good and if it’s true that

with mutual love every difficulty is surmounted.

There is no greater testimony for a child than seeing his own parents love one another tenderly,

respect one another, be kind to each other, forgive one another; this fills children’s hearts with

true joy and happiness. Before dwelling in a house made of bricks, children dwell in another

house, which is even more essential: they dwell in the reciprocal love of their parents. I ask you,

every one to answer in your heart: do your children abide in your mutual love? Parents have the

vocation to love one another. God has sowed in their hearts the vocation to love, because God is

love. And this is your vocation as parents: love. However, always think of the children, always think

of the children!

The second word that comes to me, the second thought on which to reflect is communion. We

know that God is communion in the diversity of the Three Persons of the Most Holy Trinity. Being

parents is founded in the diversity of being, as the Bible reminds, male and female. This is the

“first” and most fundamental difference, constitutive of the human being. It is a treasure.

Differences are treasures. There are so many people who are afraid of differences, but they are

treasures. And this difference is the “first” and fundamental difference, constitutive of the human

being. When engaged couples come to be married, I like to say to him, after speaking of the

Gospel: “Don’t forget that your vocation is to render your wife more woman!”; and to her I say:

“your vocation is to make your husband more man!” And thus they love one another, but they

love one another in the differences, more man and more woman. And this is the craftsmanship of

marriage, of the family, every day; to make the other grow, to think of the other: the husband of

the wife and the wife of the husband. This is communion.

I tell you that often couples who are celebrating their 50th, sometimes 60th wedding anniversary

come to Mass at Santa Marta. And they are happy; they smile. More than once I have seen the

husband caress his wife. After 50 years! I ask the question: “Who has endured whom?” And they

always answer: “Both”. Love leads us to this: patience. And in these old marriages, like good wine

that gets better with age, one sees this daily work of the man to make his wife more a woman and

the wife to make her husband more a man. They are not afraid of the differences! This challenge

of carrying differences forward, this challenge enriches them, matures them, makes them great

and they have eyes shining with joy, of so many years lived thus in love — what a great treasure is

this diversity, a diversity that becomes complementarity and reciprocity. There is a knot there, one

with the other. And this reciprocity and complementarity in difference is so important for the

children. Children mature seeing father and mother like this; they mature their own identity in

confronting the love that father and mother have, in being confronted with this difference. We

men learn to recognize, through the female figures we encounter in life, the extraordinary beauty

of which woman is the bearer. And women follow a similar line, learning from male figures that

man is different and has his own way of feeling, of understanding and of living. And this

communion in diversity is also very important for the upbringing of the children, because mothers

have greater sensitivity for some aspects of their life, while fathers have it for others. This

educational intention is beautiful, which puts the different talents of the parents at the service of

the children’s growth. It is an important quality to cultivate and to protect.

It is very painful when a family lives with unresolvable tension, a fracture that cannot be healed. It

is painful! When the first signs of this appear, a father and a mother have the duty to themselves

and to their children to ask for help, to be supported. Ask help first of all from God. Remember

Jesus’ account, you know it well: it is that Father who is able to take the first step towards his two

sons, one who left home and spent everything, the other who remained at home.... The Lord will

give you the strength to understand that evil can be overcome, that unity is greater than conflict,

that the wounds we have inflicted on one another can be healed, in the name of a greater love, of

that Love that He has called you to live through the Sacrament of Marriage.

And also when separation — we must also speak of this — seems inevitable, know that the Church

carries you in her heart. And that your educational task is not to be interrupted: you are and

always will be a father and mother, who cannot live together because of wounds, of problems.

Please always seek understanding, collaboration, harmony for the good and happiness of your

children. Please do not take your child hostage! Do not use your children as hostages! How much

harm is done by parents who have separated, or just separated in their heart, when the father

speaks badly of the mother to the child and the mother speaks badly to him of the father. This is

terrible, because that child, that boy, that girl grows up with tension that he or she cannot resolve

and learns the awful way of hypocrisy, to say what pleases each one in order to take advantage.

This is a terrible evil! Never, never speak badly of the other to the children! Never! — because

they are the first victims of this battle and, allow me to say, also of this hatred so often between

the two. Children are sacred. Don’t wound them! “Look, father and mother don’t understand each

other, it’s better that they separate”. “But you know” — the mother says — “your father is a good

man”; “You know” — the father says — “your mother is a good woman”. Keep the problems to

yourselves, don’t take them to your children.

However, there is also the way of forgiveness. Forgive one another and accept one another’s

limitations; this will also help you understand and accept your children’s frailties and weaknesses,

which are an occasion to love them more and help them grow. Only thus will they not be

frightened of their own limitations, not be discouraged but able to go forward. A father and a

mother who love one another know how to speak to a son or daughter who is on a difficult path...

and how to speak without using words. A director told me that his mother was a widow and he

was her only son; at 20 he gave in to alcohol and his mother worked as a domestic; they were very

poor; and when his mother went out to work, she saw him sleeping — but he wasn’t asleep, he

could see — and without saying a word, she left. This look of his mother saved the son, because he

said: “It can’t be that my mother goes to work and I live to get drunk!”. Thus this man changed. A

look without words can also save children. Children notice this.

And the gift of marriage, which is so beautiful, is also a mission. A mission that is very important.

You are collaborators with the Holy Spirit who whispers Jesus’ words to you! Be the same for your

children! Be missionaries to your children. They will learn from your lips and from your life that

following the Lord gives one enthusiasm, a desire to spend oneself for others, it always gives hope,

even in face of difficulties and sorrow, because we are never alone, but always with the Lord and

with our brothers and sisters. And this is important especially in pre-adolescence, when the search

for God becomes more conscious and the questions call for well-founded answers.”

(Sunday, 14 June 2015, Address to Participants in Rome's Diocesan Conference)

“I also wish to share with you the firm will to promote the family, as a gift of God for the

fulfillment of man and woman created in his image and as the “fundamental cell of society”, a

place “where we learn to live with others despite our differences and to belong to one another”

and “where parents pass on the faith to their children” (Apostolic Exhortation Evangelii Gaudium,

n. 66). Instead we must confirm that today marriage is often considered a form of affective

gratification which can be constituted in any way and modified according to each one’s sensibility

(cf. ibid.). Unfortunately such a reductive concept also influences the mentality of Christians,

facilitating the recourse to divorce or de facto separation. We Pastors are called to question

ourselves on the marriage preparation of engaged young people and also on how to assist all

those who experience these situations, so that children do not become the first victims and

spouses do not feel excluded from God’s mercy and the solicitude of the Church, but that they are

helped in their journey of faith and the Christian education of the children.

The economic and social crisis that has also assailed your countries has, unfortunately, fostered

emigration, so that in your communities there are often single-parent families in need of special

pastoral care. The absence of the father or the mother in many families entails from the other

spouse greater effort, in every sense, in raising the children. Your care and the pastoral charity of

your priests, united with the active closeness of the communities, is truly precious for these

families.2

(Thursday, 11 June 2015, Address to the Bishops of the Episcopal Conference of Latvia and Estonia )

“Among the initiatives that are necessary to increasingly consolidate the pastoral care of the

family, given the serious social problems that afflict it: the difficult economic situation, emigration,

domestic violence, unemployment, drug trafficking and corruption are realities that generate

concern. Allow me to call your attention to the value and beauty of marriage. The

complementarity of man and woman, the pinnacle of divine creation, is being questioned by the

so-called gender ideology, in the name of a more free and just society. The differences between

man and woman are not for opposition or subordination, but for communion and generation,

always in the “image and likeness” of God. Without mutual self-giving, neither one can understand

the other in depth (cf. General Audience, 15 April 2015). The Sacrament of Marriage is a sign of

God’s love for humanity and of Christ’s devotion to his Bride, the Church. Look after this treasure,

one of the “most important of the Latin American and Caribbean peoples” (Aparecida Document,

n. 433).”

(Monday, 8 June 2015, Address to the bishops of the Episcopal Conference of Puerto Rico)

“Among the various social groups, I would like to mention in particular the family, which is

everywhere threatened by many factors: by domestic violence, alcoholism, sexism, drug addiction,

unemployment, urban unrest, the abandonment of the elderly, and children left to the streets.

These problems often meet with pseudo-solutions which are not healthy for the family, but which

show the clear effects of an ideological colonization... Many social problems are resolved in the

family, and resolved quietly; there are so many of them. The failure to assist families would leave

those who are most vulnerable without protection.”

(Wednesday, 8 July 2015, Bolivia: Meeting with Civil Authorities)

“In families, everyone contributes to the common purpose, everyone works for the common good,

not denying each person’s individuality but encouraging and supporting it. They quarrel, but there

is something that does not change: the family bond. Family disputes are resolved afterwards. The

joys and sorrows of each are felt by all. That is what it means to be a family!”

“This feeling can give rise to small gestures which strengthen personal bonds. I have often spoken

about the importance of the family as the primary cell of society. In the family, we find the basic

values of love, fraternity and mutual respect, which translate into essential values for society as a

whole: gratuitousness, solidarity and subsidiarity. And so, beginning with what it means to be at

home and looking at the family, let us consider society through the social values that we foster at

home in the family: gratuitousness, solidarity and subsidiarity.”

(Tuesday, 7 July 2015, Ecuador: Meeting with Political, Economic and Civic Leaders)

“I am happy to be able to share these moments of pastoral reflection with you, amid the joyful

celebrations for the World Meeting of Families. I am speaking in Spanish because they told me

that you all know Spanish.

For the Church, the family is not first and foremost a cause for concern, but rather the joyous

confirmation of God’s blessing upon the masterpiece of creation. Every day, all over the world, the

Church can rejoice in the Lord’s gift of so many families who, even amid difficult trials, remain

faithful to their promises and keep the faith!

I would say that the foremost pastoral challenge of our changing times is to move decisively

towards recognizing this gift. For all the obstacles we see before us, gratitude and appreciation

should prevail over concerns and complaints. The family is the fundamental locus of the covenant

between the Church and God’s creation, with that creation which God blessed on the last day with

a family. Without the family, not even the Church would exist. Nor could she be what she is called

to be, namely “a sign and instrument of communion with God and of the unity of the entire

human race” (Lumen Gentium, 1).”

“Should we blame our young people for having grown up in this kind of society? Should we

condemn them for living in this kind of a world? Should they hear their pastors saying that “it was

all better back then”, “the world is falling apart and if things go on this way, who knows where we

will end up?” It makes me think of an Argentine tango! No, I do not think that this is the way. As

shepherds following in the footsteps of the Good Shepherd, we are asked to seek out, to

accompany, to lift up, to bind up the wounds of our time. To look at things realistically, with the

eyes of one who feels called to action, to pastoral conversion. The world today demands this

pastoral conversion on our part. “It is vitally important for the Church today to go forth and preach

the Gospel to all: to all places, on all occasions, without hesitation, reluctance or fear. The joy of

the Gospel is for all people: no one can be excluded” (Evangelii Gaudium, 23). The Gospel is not a

product to be consumed; it is not a part of this culture of consumption.

We would be mistaken, however, to see this “culture” of the present world as mere indifference

towards marriage and the family, as pure and simple selfishness. Are today’s young people

hopelessly timid, weak, inconsistent? We must not fall into this trap. Many young people, in the

context of this culture of discouragement, have yielded to a form of unconscious acquiescence.

They are afraid, deep down, paralyzed before the beautiful, noble and truly necessary challenges.

Many put off marriage while waiting for ideal conditions, when everything can be perfect.

Meanwhile, life goes on, without really being lived to the full. For knowledge of life’s true

pleasures only comes as the fruit of a long-term, generous investment of our intelligence,

enthusiasm and passion.

Addressing Congress, a few days ago, I said that we are living in a culture which pressures some

young people not to start a family because they lack the material means to do so, and others

because they are so well off that they are happy as they are. That is the temptation, not to start a

family.

As pastors, we bishops are called to collect our energies and to rebuild enthusiasm for making

families correspond ever more fully to the blessing of God which they are! We need to invest our

energies not so much in rehearsing the problems of the world around us and the merits of

Christianity, but in extending a sincere invitation to young people to be brave and to opt for

marriage and the family. In Buenos Aires, many women used to complain about their children who

were 30, 32 or 34 years old and still single: “I don’t know what to do” – “Well, stop ironing their

shirts!” Young people have to be encouraged to take this risk, but it is a risk of fruitfulness and life.

Here too, we need a bit of holy parrhesia on the part of bishops. “Why aren’t you married?” “Yes, I

have a fiancée, but we don’t know… maybe yes, maybe no… We’re saving some money for the

party, for this or that…” The holy parrhesia to accompany them and make them grow towards the

commitment of marriage.

A Christianity which “does” little in practice, while incessantly “explaining” its teachings, is

dangerously unbalanced. I would even say that it is stuck in a vicious circle. A pastor must show

that the “Gospel of the family” is truly “good news” in a world where self-concern seems to reign

supreme! We are not speaking about some romantic dream: the perseverance which is called for

in having a family and raising it transforms the world and human history. Families transform the

world and history.

A pastor serenely yet passionately proclaims the word of God. He encourages believers to aim

high. He will enable his brothers and sisters to hear and experience God’s promise, which can

expand their experience of motherhood and fatherhood within the horizon of a new “familiarity”

with God (Mk 3:31-35).

A pastor watches over the dreams, the lives and the growth of his flock. This “watchfulness” is not

the result of talking but of shepherding. Only one capable of standing “in the midst of” the flock

can be watchful, not someone who is afraid of questions, afraid of contact and accompaniment. A

pastor keeps watch first and foremost with prayer, supporting the faith of his people and instilling

confidence in the Lord, in his presence. A pastor remains vigilant by helping people to lift their

gaze at times of discouragement, frustration and failure. We might well ask whether in our

pastoral ministry we are ready to “waste” time with families. Whether we are ready to be present

to them, sharing their difficulties and joys”.

(Sunday, 27 September 2015, Philadelphia: Meeting with Bishops taking part in the World Meeting

of Families )

“But the most beautiful thing God made – so the Bible tells us – was the family. He created man

and woman. And he gave them everything. He entrusted the world to them: “Grow, multiply,

cultivate the earth, make it bear fruit, let it grow”. All the love he put into that marvelous creation,

he entrusted to a family.

Let’s go back a bit. All the love God has in himself, all the beauty God has in himself, all the truth

God has in himself, he entrusts to the family. A family is truly a family when it is capable of

opening its arms to receive all that love. Of course the garden of Eden is long gone; life has its

problems; men and women – through the wiles of the devil – experienced division. And all that

love which God gave us was practically lost. And in no time, the first crime was committed, the

first fratricide. Brother kills brother: war. God’s love, beauty and truth, and on the other hand the

destructiveness of war: we are poised between those two realities even today. It is up to us to

choose, to decide which way to go.

But let’s go back. When the man and his wife went astray and walked away from God, God did not

leave them alone. Such was his love. So great was his love that he began to walk with mankind, he

began to walk alongside his people, until the right time came and then he gave the greatest

demonstration of love: his Son. And where did he send his Son? To a palace, to a city, to an office

building? He sent him to a family. God came into the world in a family. And he could do this

because that family was a family with a heart open to love, a family whose doors were open. We

can think of Mary, a young woman. She couldn’t believe it: “How can this be?” But once it was

explained to her, she obeyed. We think of Joseph, full of dreams for making a home; then along

comes this surprise which he doesn’t understand. He accepts, he obeys. And in the loving

obedience of this woman, Mary, and this man, Joseph, we have a family into which God comes.

God always knocks on the doors of our hearts. He likes to do that. He goes out from within. But do

you know what he likes best of all? To knock on the doors of families. And to see families which

are united, families which love, families which bring up their children, educating them and helping

them to grow, families which build a society of goodness, truth and beauty.

We are celebrating the festival of families. The family has a divine identity card. Do you see what I

mean? God gave the family an identity card, so that families could be places in our world where

his truth, love and beauty could continue to take root and grow. Some of you may say to me:

“Father, you can say that because you’re not married!”. Certainly, in the family there are

difficulties. In families we argue. In families sometimes we throw dishes. In families children cause

headaches. I’m not going to say anything about mothers-in-law! Families always, always, have

crosses. Always. Because the love of God, the Son of God, also asked us to follow him along this

way. But in families also, the cross is followed by resurrection, because there too the Son of God

leads us. So the family is – if you excuse the word – a workshop of hope, of the hope of life and

resurrection, since God was the one who opened this path. Then too, there are children. Children

are hard work. When we were children, we were hard work. Sometimes back home I see some of

my staff who come to work with rings under their eyes. They have a one- or two-month-old baby.

And I ask them: “Didn’t you get any sleep?” And they say: “No, the baby cried all night”. In

families, there are difficulties, but those difficulties are resolved by love. Hatred doesn’t resolve

any difficulty. Divided hearts do not resolve difficulties. Only love is capable of resolving difficulty.

Love is a celebration, love is joy, love is perseverance.

I don’t want to keep on talking because it will go on too long, but I did want to stress two little

points about the family. I would ask you to think about them. We have to care in a special way for

children and for grandparents. Children and young people are the future; they are our strength;

they are what keep us moving forward. They are the ones in whom we put our hope.

Grandparents are a family’s memory. They are the ones who gave us the faith, they passed the

faith on to us. Taking care of grandparents and taking care of children is the sign of love – I’m not

sure if it is the greatest, but for the family I would say that it is the most promising – because it

promises the future. A people incapable of caring for children and caring for the elderly is a people

without a future, because it lacks the strength and the memory needed to move forward. The

family is beautiful, but it takes hard work; it brings problems. In the family, sometimes there is

fighting. The husband argues with the wife; they get upset with each other, or children get upset

with their parents. May I offer a bit of advice: never end the day without making peace in the

family.”

(Saturday, 26 September 2015, Philadelphia: Prayer Vigil for the Festival of Families )

“I will end my visit to your country in Philadelphia, where I will take part in the World Meeting of

Families. It is my wish that throughout my visit the family should be a recurrent theme. How

essential the family has been to the building of this country! And how worthy it remains of our

support and encouragement! Yet I cannot hide my concern for the family, which is threatened,

perhaps as never before, from within and without. Fundamental relationships are being called into

question, as is the very basis of marriage and the family. I can only reiterate the importance and,

above all, the richness and the beauty of family life.

In particular, I would like to call attention to those family members who are the most vulnerable,

the young. For many of them, a future filled with countless possibilities beckons, yet so many

others seem disoriented and aimless, trapped in a hopeless maze of violence, abuse and despair.

Their problems are our problems. We cannot avoid them. We need to face them together, to talk

about them and to seek effective solutions rather than getting bogged down in discussions. At the

risk of oversimplifying, we might say that we live in a culture which pressures young people not to

start a family, because they lack possibilities for the future. Yet this same culture presents others

with so many options that they too are dissuaded from starting a family.”

(Thursday, 24 September 2015, Washington: Visit to the Joint Session of the United States

Congress)

“John’s Gospel tells us that Jesus worked his first miracle at the wedding feast of Cana, at a family

party. There he was, with Mary, his Mother, and some of his disciples. They were sharing in a

family celebration.

Weddings are special times in many people’s lives. For the “older folks”, parents and

grandparents, it is an opportunity to reap the fruits of what they have sown. Our hearts rejoice

when we see children grow up and make a home of their own. For a moment, we see that

everything we worked for was worth the effort. To raise children, to support and encourage them,

to help them want to make a life for themselves and form a family: this is a great challenge for

parents. Weddings, too, show us the joy of young spouses. The future is open before them, and

everything has the flavor of a new home, of hope. Weddings always bring together the past which

we inherit and the future in which we put our hope. There is memory and hope. Weddings are an

opportunity to be grateful for everything which has brought us to this day, with the same love

which we have received.

Jesus begins his public life at a wedding. He enters into that history of sowing and reaping, of

dreams and quests, of efforts and commitments, of hard work which tills the land so that it can

yield fruit. Jesus began his life within a family, within a home. And it is precisely our homes into

which he continues to enter, and of which he becomes a part. He likes to be part of a family.

It is interesting to see how Jesus also shows up at meals, at dinners. Eating with different people,

visiting different homes, was a special way for him to make known God’s plan. He goes to the

home of his friends, Martha and Mary, but he is not choosy; it makes no difference to him

whether publicans or sinners are there, like Zacchaeus. He goes to Zacchaeus’ house. He didn’t

just act this way himself; when he sent his disciples out to proclaim the good news of the kingdom

of God he told them: Stay in the same house, eating and drinking what they provide (Lk 10:7).

Weddings, visits to people’s homes, dinners: those moments in people’s lives become “special”

because Jesus chose to be part of them.

I remember in my former diocese how many families told me that almost the only time they came

together was at dinner, in the evening after work, when the children had finished their homework.

These were special times in the life of the family. They talked about what happened that day and

what each of them had done; they tidied the house, put things away and organized their chores

for the next few days; the children bickered; but it was a special time. These were also times when

someone might come home tired, or when arguments or disagreements might break out between

husband and wife, but there are worse things to fear. I am more afraid of marriages where

spouses tell me they have never, ever argued. It is rare. Jesus chooses all those times to show us

the love of God. He chooses those moments to enter into our hearts and to help us to discover the

Spirit of life at work in our homes and our daily affairs. It is in the home that we learn fraternity

and solidarity, we learn not to be overbearing. It is in the home that we learn to receive, to

appreciate life as a blessing and to realize that we need one another to move forward. It is in the

home that we experience forgiveness, and we are constantly invited to forgive and to grow. It is

interesting that in the home there is no room for “putting on masks”: we are who we are, and in

one way or another we are called to do our best for others.

That is why the Christian community calls families “domestic churches”. It is in the warmth of the

home that faith fills every corner, lights up every space, builds community. At those moments,

people learn to discover God’s love present and at work.

In many cultures today, these spaces are shrinking, these experiences of family are disappearing,

and everything is slowly breaking up, growing apart. We have fewer moments in common, to stay

together, to stay at home as a family. As a result, we don’t know how to be patient, we don’t know

how to ask permission, we don’t know how to beg forgiveness, we don’t know how to say “thank

you”, because our homes are growing empty. Not of people, but empty of relationships, empty of

human contact, empty of encounters, between parents, children, grandparents, grandchildren and

siblings. Not long ago, someone who works with me told me that his wife and children had gone

off on vacation, while he remained home alone because he had to work those days. The first day,

the house was completely quiet, “at peace”; he was happy and nothing was out of place. On the

third day, when I asked him how things were going, he told me: I wish they would all come back

soon. He felt he couldn’t live without his wife and children. And that is beautiful, very beautiful.

Without family, without the warmth of home, life grows empty, there is a weakening of the

networks which sustain us in adversity, the networks which nurture us in daily living and motivate

us to build a better future. The family saves us from two present-day phenomena, two things

which happen every day: fragmentation, that is, division, and uniformity. In both cases, people

turn into isolated individuals, easy to manipulate and to rule. Then in our world we see societies

which are divided, broken, separated or rigidly uniform. These are a result of the breakup of family

bonds, the loss of those relationships which make us who we are, which teach us to be persons.

Then we forget how to say dad, mom, son, daughter, grandfather, grandmother… we gradually

lose a sense of these basic relationships, relationships at the basis of the name we bear.

The family is a school of humanity, a school which teaches us to open our hearts to others’ needs,

to be attentive to their lives. When we live together life as a family, we keep our little ways of

being selfish in check – they will always be there, because each of us has a touch of selfishness –

but when there is no family life, what results are those “me, myself and I” personalities who are

completely self-centered and lacking any sense of solidarity, fraternity, cooperation, love and

fraternal disagreements. They don’t have it. Amid all the difficulties troubling our families in our

world today, please, never forget one thing: families are not a problem, they are first and

foremost an opportunity. An opportunity which we have to care for, protect and support. In other

words, they are a blessing. Once you begin to see the family as a problem, you get bogged down,

you don’t move forward, because you are caught up in yourself.

Nowadays we talk a lot about the future, about the kind of world we want to leave to our children,

the kind of society we want for them. I believe that one possible answer lies in looking at

yourselves, at this family which spoke to us. Let us leave behind a world with families. No doubt

about it: the perfect family does not exist; there are no perfect husbands and wives, perfect

parents, perfect children or – if they will not get mad at me for saying this, perfect mothers-in-law.

Those families don’t exist. But that does not prevent families from being the answer for the future.

God inspires us to love, and love always engages with the persons it loves. Love always engages

with the persons it loves. So let us care for our families, true schools for the future. Let us care for

our families, true spaces of freedom. Let us care for families, true centers of humanity.”

(Tuesday, 22 September 2015, Santiago: Meeting with Families )

“Naturally, a movement of conjugal spirituality such as yours fully express the attention that the

Church wants to have for families, and it does so both by promoting the maturation of the couples

who work with your Teams, through the fraternal support given to other couples to whom they

are sent.

Indeed, I would like to insist on this missionary role of the Teams of Our Lady. Every committed

couple certainly receives a great deal from its Team experience, and its conjugal life is deepened

by refining itself through the spirituality of the Movement. However, after receiving from Christ

and from the Church, a Christian is irresistibly sent out to witness to and pass on what he has

received. “The new evangelization calls for personal involvement on the part of each of the

baptized” (Apostolic Exhortation Evangelii Gaudium, n. 120). Christian couples and families are

often the best placed to proclaim Jesus Christ to other families, to support, fortify and encourage

them. What you live as couples and as families — accompanied by the very charism of your

Movement — the profound and irreplaceable joy that the Lord enables you to feel in domestic

intimacy in joy and sorrow, in the happiness of your spouse’s presence, in the growth of your

children, in the human and spiritual fruitfulness that He grants you, all this is to be witnessed to,

proclaimed and communicated outside so that others, in turn, may set out on this path.

In the first place, then, I encourage all couples to put into practice, and to live in depth, with

constancy and perseverance, the spirituality the Teams of Our Lady follow. I think that the

proposed “concrete points of commitment” are truly effective aides, which enable couples to

progress with confidence in conjugal life on the way of the Gospel. I am thinking, in particular, of

the a prayer of couples and prayer in the family, a beautiful and necessary tradition that has

always supported the faith and hope of Christians, unfortunately abandoned in so many regions of

the world. I am also thinking of the time for monthly dialogue proposed to the spouses — the

famous and demanding “duty to sit down”, which runs so counter to the habits of the frenetic and

agitated world pervaded by individualism — a moment of exchange lived in truth under the Lord’s

gaze. It is a precious time of thanksgiving, of forgiveness, of mutual respect and attention to the

other. I am thinking, lastly, of faithful participation in Team life, which brings to each one the

richness of learning and of sharing, as well as the help and comfort of friendship. In this regard, I

emphasize the mutual fruitfulness of this encounter experienced with a priest who supports you. I

thank you, dear couples of the Teams of Our Lady, for being a support and encouragement to the

ministry of your priests, who always find priestly joy, fraternal presence, emotional balance and

spiritual paternity in their contact with your Teams and your families.

Secondly, I invite the couples, fortified by Team meetings in the missionary commitment. This

mission which is entrusted to them, is all the more important inasmuch as the image of the family

— as God wills it, composed of one man and one woman in view of the good of the spouses and

also of the procreation and upbringing of children — is deformed through powerful adverse

projects supported by ideological trends. You are certainly already missionaries by the radiation of

your family life to the spheres of your friendships and relationships, and also other areas. In fact, a

happy and balanced family, inhabited by the presence of God, speaks in and of itself of God’s love

for all men. I also invite you to commit yourselves, if possible, in an ever more concrete way and

with ever renewed creativity, to the activities that can be organized to welcome, form and support

in the faith young couples in particular, before and after marriage.

I also exhort you to continue to be close to wounded families, who are so numerous today, due to

unemployment, poverty, health problems, mourning, worry over a child, the imbalance caused by

an estrangement or absence, a climate of violence. We must have the courage to come into

contact with these families, in a discreet but generous way, materially, humanly or spiritually, in

those circumstances where they are most vulnerable.

I cannot but encourage the couples of the Équipes Notre Dame to be instruments of the mercy of

Christ and of the Church towards people whose marriage has failed. Never forget that your

conjugal fidelity is a gift of God, and that mercy has been exercised on behalf of each one of us. A

united and happy couple can understand better than anyone else, as from within, the wound and

the suffering caused by abandonment, betrayal, failure of love. Therefore, it is necessary that you

be able to bring your testimony and your experience to help Christian communities to discern the

real situations of these people, and to accept them with their wounds, and help them to walk in

faith and in truth, under the gaze of Christ the Good Shepherd, to play an appropriate role in the

life of the Church. Nor should you forget the unspeakable suffering of youngsters who experience

these painful family situations: you can give them much.”

(Thursday, 10 September 2015, Address to Participants in the meeting sponsored by the Teams of

our Lady (Equipes Notre-Dame))

“In this regard I like to recall that fundamental “centre of pastoral vocation” which is the family,

the domestic Church and the first and most fundamental place of human formation, where the

desire for a life conceived as a vocational path can burgeon in young people, to be followed with

commitment and generosity.

In families and all the other community contexts — school, parishes, associations, groups of

friends — we learn to have relationships with real people, we are moulded by our relationships

with them, and we also become who we are because of them.”

(Friday, 20 November 2015, Address to Participants in the Convention sponsored by the

Congregation for the Clergy on the 50th Anniversary of the Conciliar decrees "Optatam Totius" and

"Presbyterorum Ordinis")

“In fact respect for the value of life and, even more so, love for it, finds irreplaceable fulfillment in

reaching out, drawing near, taking care of those who suffer in body and spirit: all actions that

characterize health pastoral care. Actions and, even before, attitudes that the Church will

especially emphasize during the Jubilee of Mercy, which calls us all to be close to our most

suffering brothers and sisters. In Evangelium Vitae we can trace the constitutive elements of the

“culture of salus”: namely, hospitality, compassion, understanding and forgiveness. They are the

habitual attitudes of Jesus in relation to the multitude of needy people that approached him every

day: the sick of every kind, public sinners, the demon-possessed, the marginalized, the poor,

foreigners.... And, curiously, in our throwaway culture, they are rejected, they are left aside. They

don’t count. It’s curious... What does this mean? That the throwaway culture is not of Jesus, it’s

not Christian.

Such attitudes are what the Encyclical calls “positive requirements” of the Commandment about

the inviolability of life, which, with Jesus, are manifested in all their breadth and depth, and which

again today can, or better yet, must distinguish health pastoral care: they “range from caring for

the life of one’s brother (whether a blood brother, someone belonging to the same people, or a

foreigner living in the land of Israel) to showing concern for the stranger, even to the point of

loving one’s enemy” (n. 41).”

(Thursday, 19 November 2015, Address to Participants in the International Conference sponsored

by the Pontifical Council for Health care workers [For Health Pastoral Care])

“In existential dynamics everything is related, and one should nourish personal and social

sensitivity both towards the acceptance of a new life and towards those situations of poverty and

exploitation that affect the most vulnerable and disadvantaged. “How can we genuinely teach the

importance of concern for other vulnerable beings [...] if we fail to protect a human embryo”

(Encyclical Letter Laudato Si ’ n. 120), and, at the same time, sustain that “human life is itself a gift

which must be defended from various forms of debasement” (ibid., n. 5). Indeed, we must note

with sorrow that there are many people tried by poor living conditions, who require our attention

and our commitment to solidarity.

Though right and noble, yours is not merely a social service. For the disciples of Christ, helping

wounded human life means going to meet the people in need, putting yourself at their side,

sharing in their fragility and their pain so that they can recover. How many families are vulnerable

due to poverty, disease, lack of work and home! How many elderly persons endure the burdens of

suffering and loneliness! How many young people are lost, threatened by addictions and other

forms of slavery, waiting to regain confidence in life! These people, wounded in body and spirit,

are icons of that man of the Gospel, who, along the road from Jerusalem to Jericho, fell among

robbers who stripped him and beat him. First he experienced the indifference of some, and then

the closeness of the Good Samaritan (cf. Lk 10:30-37).

On that road, which crosses the desert of life, in our time too there are still many wounded,

because of today’s robbers, that strip them not only of assets but also of their dignity. In the face

of pain, and the needs of these helpless brothers, some look the other way or beyond them, while

others stop and respond with generous dedication to their cry for help. You, members of the Pro-

Life Movement, have strived for 40 years to imitate the Good Samaritan. Faced with various forms

of threats to human life, you draw near to the fragility of others, you have been searching to make

it so that those who live in precarious conditions are not excluded or rejected from society.

Through the widespread efforts of the Pro-Life Help Centres, spread throughout Italy, you have

been occasions of hope and rebirth for many people.

I thank you for the good you have done and that you continue to do with so much love, and I

exhort you to continue with confidence on this path, continuing to be Good Samaritans! Never tire

of working to protect the most vulnerable people, who have the right to be born to life, as well as

for the many who ask for a healthier and more dignified existence. There is a particular need for

work at different levels and with perseverance, for the promotion and defence of the family,

society’s first resource, especially in reference to the gift of children and affirming the dignity of

women. In this regard, I would like to highlight that in your activity you have always welcomed

everyone regardless of religion and nationality. The number of women, especially immigrants, who

come to your centres, shows that when concrete support is offered, women, in spite of problems

and constraints, are able to make sense of love, life and motherhood triumph within themselves.”

(Friday, 6 November 2015, Address to participants in the Italian Convention of Pro-life Movements)