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Objectives

• To discuss the process of dating and developing relationships.

• To recognize roles, responsibilities and challenges in a marriage.

• To analyze components of a healthy marriage.

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Main Menu

• Building Relationships

• Marriage

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Relationships

• Involve two people getting to know each other and developing care and respect for one another

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Healthy Relationships

• Involve:– respect– trust– honesty– support– fairness– communication

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Dating

• Is the process of building relationships to find and choose a mate

• Includes:– group dating– random dating– steady dating

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Group Dating

• Is when several boys and girls spend time together – many call this hanging out

• Is a good way to ease into the dating scene– there is usually less pressure, awkwardness

and tension

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Random Dating

• Is when a person dates more than one person at a time

• Can be a good way to develop a sense of what qualities you are looking for in a mate

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Steady Dating

• Is when two people are attracted to each other and decide to spend time together, without others, to build their relationship

• Can build a relationship to help prepare a couple for marriage

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Dating

• Can help you– learn about yourself and your needs– learn how to get along with others– improve communication and interpersonal

skills– learn about differences in personalities and

values– have fun– prepare for mate selection and marriage

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Dating

• Should help you understand and value healthy relationships– all experiences may not be perfect, but each

experience can help you learn what is healthy and what is not

– you should never feel controlled, threatened or humiliated while dating

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Building Healthy Relationships

• Requires:– communication– trust– understanding– tolerance– respect– patience

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Communication

• Is vital to healthy relationships• Allows for self expression• Should be:

– honest– respectful– assertive– considerate

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Levels of Communication

Deepest thoughts and feelings revealedReactions and emotions shared

Honest sharing of feelings and emotions occurs

Speaker watches for acceptance or rejection of ideas before sharing all

No opinions or feelings sharedFacts and events reported

No emotions revealed or discussedConversation based on common expressions

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Assessment

1. Healthy relationships do NOT involve which of the following?A. FairnessB. RespectC. ControlD. Support

 2. Many call group dating which of the following?

A. No-pressure datingB. Hanging outC. Casual assemblyD. General companionship

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Assessment

3. Which type of dating occurs when a person dates more than one person at a time?

A. Periodic datingB. Steady datingC. Group datingD. Random dating

 4. Which type of dating occurs when two people are attracted to

each other and decide to spend time together, without others, to build their relationship?

A. Periodic datingB. Steady datingC. Group datingD. Random dating

 

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Assessment

5. Which of the following describes what occurs in the highest level of communication (level 1)?

A. Speaker watches for acceptance or rejection of ideas before sharing all

B. No opinions of feelings are shared; facts and events are reported

C. Deepest thoughts and feeling are revealed; reactions and emotions are shared

D. Conversation is based on common expressions  

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Marriage

• Is a formal union between two people, usually recognized by law

• Is ideally entered into by two people who love each other and both want to make their relationship official and permanent

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Roles in a Marriage

• Are determined by both people in the relationship– a couple should develop a shared

understanding of who does what in the relationship

• Differ from relationship to relationship– what works for you and your partner may not

work for another couple and vice versa

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Roles in a Marriage

• Include management of the following:– finances

• making money and managing money

– domestic affairs• maintaining the home

– social affairs• managing social commitments

and friendships– child upbringing (if applicable)

• caring for children

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Roles in a Marriage

• Are not determined by gender– the “traditional” gender roles of men as

breadwinners and women as homemakers are less common today than in the past

– many couples share and play a part in all roles– couples should discuss

roles and determine what is most effective for them

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Responsibilities in a Marriage

• Are the elements which help a relationship grow stronger and more rewarding

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Responsibilities in a Marriage

• Include:– listening to and communicating with each other– resolving conflicts constructively– making decisions and solving

problems together– trusting one another– sharing burdens, duties and roles– being accountable to each other

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Responsibilities in a Marriage

• Include:– supporting each other– recognizing and appreciating the uniqueness

of one another– contributing to each other’s

self worth– sharing experiences and

emotions with each other– having fun together

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Responsibilities in a Marriage

• Should not be ignored by either partner– if one or both partners fail to fulfill their

responsibilities, hurt feelings can result and the relationship will suffer

– communication can help partners better understand what is expected and needed of them in the marriage

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Challenges of Marriage

• Include:– managing expectations– communicating effectively– making compromises– showing appreciation and gratitude– mixing families

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Managing Expectations

• Is important to avoiding disappointment in marriage– marriage takes work and is not always a

fairytale– you are not perfect and neither is your partner,

so try to be understanding of mistakes– communication can help partners understand,

manage and fulfill expectations

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Communicating Effectively

• Is not easy even outside of a marriage• Is essential to solving problems,

overcoming challenges and growing together– virtually all aspects of marriage

can be improved through effective communication or aggravated through ineffective communication

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Making Compromises

• Is typically required in marriage– couples cannot always agree– it is important neither partner feels

ignored or walked over, and often compromise is how this is achieved

• Means you may have to sacrifice something in order to give your partner something he or she wants

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Showing Appreciation & Gratitude

• For the relationship and your partner is important– do not take your partner for granted– express your love frequently– compliment your partner frequently

• Help to validate your partner and make him or her feel loved and valued

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Mixing Families

• Can be difficult because you might not like or enjoy your partner’s parents, siblings or extended family– communicate your feelings

without being critical or mean

– try to see your partner’s perspective

– be open-minded and positive

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Mixing Families

• May mean bringing children from prior relationships together– a family with children from multiple sets of

parents is called a blended family or stepfamily– this is much more complex and consequential

than mixing families without children, so it is important to consider and be comfortable with before entering into a marriage

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Overcoming Challenges

• Can be achieved though– communicating openly– listening and understanding– being unselfish– being willing to forgive and

let go– believing in the importance

of the relationship– seeking guidance and counseling

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Marriage Counseling

• Is a tool couples can use when the challenges of marriage seem to overshadow the marriage

• Involves the couple talking with a counselor and talking to each other with the counselor acting as mediator

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Marriage Counseling

• Can help partners– see each other’s perspectives– understand each other’s feelings– communicate more effectively– manage challenges more effectively– value each other and the marriage

• Is most effective when both partners are whole-heartedly involved and want to make changes to improve the marriage

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Divorce

• Is the process of legally ending a marriage– includes a lot of complex procedures

• one partner moving out of the shared home• filing a legal petition• legal hearing and trial• separation of the couple’s assets and liabilities• determining child custody (if applicable)• determining alimony and child support (if

applicable)

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Divorce

• Is a difficult process which requires much consideration and effort

• Involves a wide range of emotions for everyone affected

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Goals of Marriage

• Include:– working as a team– being able to accept and even celebrate

differences– providing support and being supported– feeling loved and sharing your love– forming a long-lasting, healthy relationship

which is mutually beneficial

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Successful Marriages

• Are fulfilling and rewarding • Involve work, compromise and sacrifice• Provide partners with love, support,

intimacy and personal growth

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Assessment

1. Which of the following defines marriage?A. A formal union between two people, usually recognized

by lawB. The decision to commit time and energy to a

relationshipC. A relationship which results in childrenD. The most significant relationship in an individual’s life

 2. Which of the following is NOT a role in marriage discussed in

the segment?A. Management of social affairsB. Management of financesC. Management of domestic affairsD. Management of the relationship

 

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Assessment

3. Which of the following is suggested to help partners understand, manage and fulfill expectations?

A. CounselingB. HobbiesC. CommunicationD. The Internet

 4. Showing appreciation and gratitude can help do which of the

following?A. Encourage your partner to give giftsB. Keep your partner from resenting mistakesC. Make your partner feel loved and valuedD. Keep you partner from cheating

  

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Assessment

5. Families with children from multiple sets of parents are called which of the following?

A. Complex familiesB. Blended familiesC. Multi familiesD. Mashed families

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Final Assessment

1. Which of the following accurately describes dating?A. The situation in which two people spend all of their time

togetherB. The process of building relationships to find and choose

a mateC. The experience of falling in loveD. The use of lust and desire to gain power over someone

 2. Which of the following is NOT a type of dating as listed in the

presentation?A. Periodic datingB. Steady datingC. Group datingD. Random dating

 

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Final Assessment

3. Building healthy relationships does NOT require which of the following?

A. ToleranceB. TrustC. SecrecyD. Patience

 4. According to the presentation, how many levels of

communication are there?A. SixB. FiveC. FourD. Three

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Final Assessment

5. Who determines roles in a marriage?A. The dominant personB. The manC. The womanD. Both people

 6. The role of management of domestic affairs refers to which of

the following?A. Making moneyB. Managing friendshipsC. Maintaining the homeD. Managing social commitments

 

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Final Assessment

7. Which of the following is NOT one of the challenges of marriage discussed in the presentation?

A. Making friendsB. Managing expectationsC. Mixing familiesD. Making compromises

 8. Virtually all aspects of marriage can be improved or aggravated

through which of the following?A. Gift-givingB. EducationC. MoneyD. Communication

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Final Assessment

9. When is marriage counseling most effective?A. When topics discussed are slight and easily negotiatedB. When the counselor has a doctorate in psychology and

is certified to counsel married couplesC. When both partners are whole-heartedly involved and

want to make changes to improve the marriageD. When the sessions occur every day for at least one

month 

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Final Assessment

10. Which of the following accurately defines divorce?A. The decision to pursue additional partnersB. The failure of a couple to be happily marriedC. The process of legally ending a marriageD. The use of physical separation to make marriage less

difficult 

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Resources

• Every Marriage Matters http://www.everymarriagematters.org• For Your Marriage http://www.foryourmarriage.org• HealthyChildren.org: Teen

http://healthychildren.org/English/ages-stages/teen• KidsHealth by Nemours: For Teens http://kidshealth.org/teen• Psychology Today: Relationships

http://www.psychologytoday.com/topics/relationships

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Acknowledgements

Production CoordinatorAmy Hogan

Brand ManagerMegan O’Quinn

Graphic DesignerMelody Rowell

Technical WriterJessica Odom

V.P. of Brand ManagementClayton Franklin

Executive ProducerGordon W. Davis, Ph.D.

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