Date post: | 21-Aug-2015 |
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Health & Medicine |
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10 QUICK TIPS
TO BETTER
RELATIONSHIPS
Regardless of whatever mentalhealth challenges try to get inthe way
www.QueenslandMentalHealth.com
My name is Ian and I have depression
My wife Pauline has schizoaffective disorder
We have been together for 14 years and our relationship has not only survivedbut thrived in spite of our mental health issues
Who am I and why am I giving advice?
and we want to share our secrets with you
www.QueenslandMentalHealth.com
Accept that you or your loved one has a mental health issue
It's no ones fault - it's just the way it is
Tip 1 - Acceptance
Dont blame anyone
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God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change,The courage to change the things I can,
And the wisdom to know the difference.
Tip 1 - Acceptance
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Be honest with yourself and your loved ones
Trust takes time to build be can be easily broken
It requires effort and determination and wont always be easy
Tip 2 - Be Honest
All strong relationships are built on truth
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Honesty is more than not lying. It is truth telling, truth speaking, truth living, and truth loving.
James E. Faust
Tip 2 - Be Honest
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Learn to be a good listener - it takes practice
Be interested in what your loved one is talking about
Listen and ask follow up questions to make sure you really understand the issues
Tip 3 - Listen
We have 2 ears and 1 mouth - use them in that proportion
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I remind myself every morning: Nothing I say this day will teach me anything.
So if I'm going to learn, I must do it by listening.Larry King
Tip 3 - Listen
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Just because something doesn't seem important or a "big deal" to you doesn'tmean it isn't to your loved one
If someone makes the effort to open up about something to you it is of importanceto them
Tip 4 - Don't Judge
Create an environment where people feel safe to share
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You can develop good judgement as you do the muscles of your body - by judicious, daily exercise.
Grenville Kleiser
Tip 4 - Don't Judge
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There will be ups and downs
Be there to support your loved one when you are needed
There are times when we all need a hug, to be held and feel safe
Tip 5 - Empathy
Imagine how you would feel if you were in their shoes
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When you show deep empathy toward others, their defensive energy goes down, and positive energy replaces it.
That's when you can get more creative in solving problems.Stephen Covey
Tip 5 - Empathy
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There are times when we all just need some space
It is healthy and normal for everyone to want and need some "me" time
Use your "me" time productively thinking about the good things the future holds
Tip 6 - Give Space
15 to 30 minutes each a day works for us and helps provide clarity
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We need to give each other the space to grow, to be ourselves, to exercise our diversity.
We need to give each other space so that we may both give and receive such beautiful things as ideas, openness, dignity, joy, healing, and inclusion.
Max de Pree
Tip 6 - Give Space
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Pay attention to medication requirements
For many, medication provides an important tool in recovery and staying well
Don't vary or stop medications without medical dupervision
Tip 7 - Comply With Medications
Medication withdrawals can be nasty both physically & mentally
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You just stay the course, and do what it is that you do, and grow while you're doing it.
Eventually it will either come full circle, or at least you'll go to bed at night happy.
Jon Bon Jovi
Tip 7 - Comply With Medications
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If you want to be able to support your loved ones you need to look after your own health - both physical & mental
Get your sleep, watch your diet, exercise if possible, stay on your meds
You and the role you play are important to someone so make sure you can be there for them when you are needed
Tip 8 - Love & Look After Yourself
You are no help to anyone if you are struggling and not at your best
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If you can learn to love yourself and all the flaws, you can love other people so much better.
And that makes you so happy.Kristin Chenoweth
Tip 8 - Love & Look After Yourself
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Find reasons to share small rewards together
It could be a coffee at starbucks or a picnic in the local park
Small rewards don't have to cost money but they do need to be something you enjoy and see as a reward for foing something well
Tip 9 - Small Rewards
Positive reinforcement is the best teacher
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Chocolate is the first luxury. It has so many things wrapped up in it:
Deliciusness in the moment, childhood memories, and that grin-inducing feeling of getting a reward for being good.
Mariska Hargitay
Tip 9 - Small Rewards
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Even if only 5 or 10 minutes a day - make the time. Inside/outside doesn't matter
There are mountains of reports & studies that show the benefit to mental healthof even low levels of exercise
Tip 10 - Exercise
Time in the sun also gives Vitamin D - great for mental health
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True enjoyment comes from activity of the mind and exercise of the body; the two are ever united.Wilhelm von Humboldt
Tip 10 - Exercise
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Always be looking for opportunities to provide positive feedback
"You really did a great job of (insert appropriate thing here) may be the pick upsomeone needed to ensure they have a great day
Bonus Tip 11 - Positive Reinforcement
Arguing & fighting destroy self confidence. Positive reinforcement builds it
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You're going to go through tough times - that's life. But I say, 'Nothing happens to you, it happens for you.'
See the positive in negative events.Joel Osteen
Bonus Tip 11 - Positive Reinforcement
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If you have enjoyed this short guide - 10 quick tips to better relationships,regardless of whatever mental health challenges try to get in the way then read more at www.QueenslandMentalHealth.com
Contacts
We hope that you and your loved ones found this helpful
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