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11 Reasons I Will Never Hire You

Date post:30-Jul-2015
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1. Congratulations Graduate!Eleven Reasons Why I Will Never Hire You. by Mark OToole - PR & content at HB Agency 2. Co m m encem ent over. 3. The real world awaits. 4. Bushy-tailed and excited, you young graduates storm the job boards. 5. Never mind the color of your parachute, some of you have no parachutes at all. 6. And that can lead to a hard landing. 7. Employers know that not all grads are created equal. 8. Sometimes we hire people like you into entry-level positions. 9. More often though, we dont. 10. Because 11. You are just not the right fit. 12. A more impressive candidate captured our attention. 13. Or you are simply a victim of some other random event out of your I didnt post that picture. 14. But too many of you who had the skills and capabilities to make the cut or get a second interview blew it. 15. Yourdisastrous interviewingskills broughtyoudown. 16. why? 17. Is it you? 18. Your family support system? 19. Your schools career servicesstaff? 20. Whatever the reason, there are consistent themes as to why you didnt get the job. 21. This wont be the first time youve heard these and it wont be the last, but as your class flourishes shiny new resumes in front of prospective employers, here are the top reasons why I will never hire you. 22. Your resume is longer than that of a 25-year professional. 1. 23. I appreciate your desire to showcase your classwork, high school accomplishments, extracurricular endeavors and your three marketing projects. 24. But I need to seeclarity and definition in what you present. 25. Make it relevant, make it concise, make it focused. 26. An overly long resume does not impress me. 27. (A ridiculously short resume is equally dangerous. Did you do anything besides attend class?) 28. You didnt prepare for our interview. 29. Youre probably a better internet surfer than I am, so why didnt you spend a few minutes gathering intelligence about me or my business? 30. You didnt look at my website. You failed to check me out on LinkedIn or Twitter. You didnt learn my pet peeves: make eye contact; learn to hold a conversation; give thoughtful answers to difficult questions. X X X 31. (Im not always concerned with your actual answer but rather your composure and thinking process when answering it). 32. q u e s tio n s 3 . 33. Look up questions to ask online. Find 30 questions no one has ever asked me. questions grads should ask in an interview 34. Show me how you gather information. 35. Do you want me to think Im going to have to do the work for you, or that youll show up prepared every day? ? 36. You wrote a thank you note, and only used it to thank me. 37. I also enjoyed our time together, so instead of just thanking me, add value. 38. Use your note (email or note/card are all fine nothing is not) to show your passion for this job. 39. Reflect upon what you learned in the interview. 40. Confirm why youre the candidate of my dreams. 41. You dressed for failure. 42. My workplace is casual, at least most of the time. Many offices are these days. 43. But you should not be for an interview. 44. Jeans, chinos, t-shirts, sund ressesandotherclothing you may wear to a weeken d cookoutoranightclub (even a nice on e)w ontcutit. 45. I want to know what youll look like when I take you to see a client. 46. Show me that you understand this. 47. what you want 48. But when you tell me that, youre basically saying, please invest loads of timeandmoneyintome, and maybe it will help mefigureoutthatIwant to do something else. 49. Convinceme that youve wanted to work here your whole life. 50. Yourresumeshould reinforceit. 51. Your follow-up note should hammer the point home. 52. ajack,thejd Imnotlookingforajack-of- all-trades.(IfIwere,thejob postingwouldhavesaidso.) 53. Because Im not really into candidates who wont throw themselves 100% into the opportunity at hand. 54. 7.You dont get social media (but think you do). 55. I dont expect you to be an expert in anything just getting out of school, but your resume claims social media expertise. 56. Dumb Tweeter @dumbtweeter Your eight tweets in the last six months are not signs of immersion. (And your regular use of #fuckinA isnt effective.) 57. Your blank Pinterest page is less than compelling. 58. Spelling Tumblr with an e says something but not the right thing. 59. Dabble in social while at school for sure. 60. Tell me you have exposure to social networks. 61. Just dont try to impress me with expertise that does not exist yet. 62. You didnt proofread. Didnt 63. d grammar spellings from y me or cover let can I expect yo If you cant eliminate bad grammaror misspellings from your resume or cover letter, how can I expect you to write an error-free report for a client? 64. You DONtHAVE A LINKEDIN PROFILE 65. LinkedIN IS THE Place to showcase your professional skills, even if they are nascent 66. Set it up right (there are lots of tips online to help) and give it some love. 67. (or two or three). Do an internship 68. While this is more for those still in school than those just out, nothing makes you more attractive to me than knowing youve been exposed to a similar work environment. 69. Internships also help you decide if my job represents the right structure for you saving us both time and agony if it turns out you just dont like what we do. 70. I get 50-100 resumes each semester from new graduates. Those with internships sit well ahead of those without. 71. Youlackedprofessionalcourtesy! 72. You were two minutes late. 73. You looked away when you shook my hand 74. I introduced you to my colleague and you didnt even ask her what she does. 75. WHY? Why would I want to expose you to my clients? 76. You and your family have invested vast amounts of time and money into getting your diploma. 77. Its a small bit of extra effort to make sure you dont ruin your chances in the interview. 78. I will hire someone I just wont hire you. 79. 1.Make a right-sized resume its a door-opener only, not your one and only chance to get an interview. 2.Interview prep makes you look like a rock star during our conversation. 3. Ask really good questions in the interview. It matters. 4.Use your promptly sent thank you note to reveal even more awesome stuff about why you make sense for this job. 5. Dress up it will make you feel better during our meeting. 6. Stay focused. 7.Social media is mainstream but dont overplay it until you know where it fits, or doesnt fit, in the job. 8. No typos! 9.LinkedIn matters you become searchable, findable and professional. 10. Internships set you apart (and give you great stuff for bullet #1). 11. Practice hand-shaking at home! Job hunting is like a job unto itself. You will get it right, but you need to work at it. 80. Mark OToole is managing director of PRcontent at HB agency, a B2B marketing and communications firm with global clients in clean tech, medical tech and high tech. Despite the very true observations in the article above, Mark has hired countless talented PR pros over the last 15 years. Reach Mark at motoole@hbagency or on Twitter @markrotoole. Design and layout courtesy of HBs Matt GustavsenChristine Tesseo. To learn more about HBs branding, marketing and public relations expertise, please visit www.hbagency.com.

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