By Vince CiottiH.I.S. (not very) Professionals, LLC

At the risk of antagonizing the many HIS vendors who have cooperated in over a hundred “strenuous” system selection processes we put them through over the years, this year features another special series of Xmas letters.

To make your holiday a little merrier (and with some help from Joseph Snowden), we managed to get copies of the private letters sent to Santa from their client CIOs.

So make sure your iPhone is charged (there are 12 leading vendors), put your feet up on your keyboard, and enjoy these “punny” missives that reveal what it’s like to be a client of theirs, listed by order of revenue. Hope Yule like it!

(PS - our attorney can be reached at: 800/555-HELP)

Dear Santa,

Please give Cerner a copy of their

own billing system to generate their

invoice to us – it will give us many months

delay before receiving them (if ever), and

even more months before they can post our

payment.

Yours truly,

Cerner CIO

Dear Santa,

We’ve grown a bit tired of

Practicing with McKesson’s

Partner for our “integrated”

hospital & ambulatory IDN. Can

you maybe get us the real thing

this year?

McKesson CIO

Dear Santa,

I’d like two things this year:

(1) thermal underwear for Epic’s user group

meetings, and

(2) (2) binoculars to see the stage.

I could pick them both up at their next

meeting near the north pole…

Yours truly,

Epic CIO

Santa,

For Xmas this year, could

you please give me Paul Black’s

phone #? I’m not a Wall Street analyst,

so it’s been hard to get a hold of him

lately…

Sincerely,

Allscripts CIO

Dear Santa,

We replaced our old

Invision system you gave us

many years ago for a brand new

gift you gave us just last year

called Soarian, Could we maybe

swap it for another system this

year?

Sincerely,

Siemens CIO

Dear Santa,

It’s been getting rather

lonely at GE’s hospital users

group meetings – could you send

some of your elves or reindeer to

liven things up?

Sincerely,

GE Centricity CIO

Dear Santa,

We’ve been having trouble with

the gift you gave us last year

called LSS: can’t seem to open the

package and get it to work with

other toys from the same

manufacturer. Can you please

send a new set that all works

together?

Loyal Meditech CIO

Dear Santa,

We just love the three wise men you

sent to our IDN:

- Opus for the hospital clinicals,

- Sphere for their financials, and

- NextGen for our physicians.

However, they don’t seem to talk very

well to each other. This year, could you

send us a translator?

NextGen CIO

Dear Santer,

We all just love the many CPSI gift

apps you gave us over the years – none

of my friends have so many, let alone

all wrapped in the exact same way.

However, they’re difficult to open and

once they’re opened, not really very

nice. Don’t mean to be fussy, but could

you send us just one or two really nice

apps this year?

Y’all have a merry one!

CPSI IT Director

Dear Santa,

That system you gave us last

year for our ED was superb -

many thanks! However, the one

for the hospital was only so-so…

Any chance we can get an

equally nice one for both places?

Medhost CIO

Santa San,

あなたは、米国の前に、今年東京で停止を確認してください ありがとうございました 親愛なるサンタ.

NTT Data CIO

Dear Santa,

Wow, that QuadraMed EHR that

you sent us last year was great – a

somewhat dated style, but real classy –

our RNs and MDs like it a lot. This

year, we’d like to spruce it up a bit to

look more modern – any chance?

Many thanks,

QuadraMed CIO

Dear Santa,

Sorry I couldn’t afford a first-class

stamp this year and I hope this3rd

class

stamp gets my letter there in time. As for

a gift, we’d be glad for anything this

year. Doesn’t have to be a Classic, nor

shipped via APS, just please leave it in

the Centriq under our tree…

Healthland IT Director

Dear Santa,

Please send Vince some

consulting business next year to

keep him out of my hair. I hoped

I was finally done with him when

he ended the HIS-tory series, but

he just never quits…

Fondest regards to you and the

Mrs,

Mr. HIS-talk