AdiscussionwithHaroonUllah

Q:YouwerebornintheUnitedStatestoSouthAsianimmigrantsandgrewupinasmallruralcommunityineasternWashingtonState.YouthenwentontostudyinternationalpolicyatHarvardKennedySchoolandlatertookapositionwiththeU.S.StateDepartment.HowdidyourchildhoodinfluenceyourdesiretodeepenAmerican’sunderstandingofPakistananditsculture?

A. Ialwaysgrewupwithacuriosityofwhatwashappeningaroundtheworld,especiallyinSouthAsia.MyfirsttriptoPakistanwaswhenIwasfiveyearsold—Ihavevividmemoriesofthecolorfulbazaarsandthesmellofthetastytreatsfromfoodvendors.Irememberourdentistandgoodfamilyfriend,Dr.ChristensonaskingmeaboutSouthAsiaduringmyvisitstohim.Hewouldsay,“WhattheheckisgoingoninPakistan?ItdarnsseemstomeliketheSovietUnionfortyyearsago”.Ididn’thaveagoodanswertohisquestion—butIbadlywantedtoknowmoreandthatplantedaseedinmetotravelandlearn.IfeltIcouldnavigatebetweenthetwocultures,asanAmericanwithSouthAsianheritage.

Q:HowdidyoumeettheRezafamilyanddiscovertheirincrediblestory?HowdidyougettheRezastotrustyousointimatelyduringsuchatimeofturmoilfortheirfamily?

A. Imetthefamilyin2004,whiledoingresearchonthemilitaryinPakistan.Iwasatadinnerpartyatafriend’splaceandoverheardAwaistalkingabouthismilitaryexperienceandPOWdays.Iwasintriguedbyhisaccountandaskedtofollowupwithhim.Awaislovedtotalkabouthisuniqueexperience.WhenIfollowedupwithhimoverlunch,IwasamazedathowmuchcourageandtenacityAwaishadasaPOW.Hewasproudofhisbackgroundandheneverwantedtogiveup.Hewasaself-madeperson.

ButevenmoreamazingwashearingaboutthoseyearsfromShez.SheremainedhopefulduringthetimeAwaiswasaPOWandfeareddead.Shewastherockthatheldthefamilytogetherthen—forebodingwhatwouldcontinueinlateryearsaswell.

AndIgottoknowShezandthefamilyovertheusualwayyougettoknowsomeonedeeplyinPakistan—byeatingmangoeswiththem!Thereisnocleanwaytoeatamango,soitcanbearealicebreaker.Itismessy,slippery,andthejuicesgoeverywhere(IusedtohonestlywearabibthefirstfewtimesItriedeatingamango!).Whenyouareeatingthemango,thereissomethingaboutyourinhibitionsthatgooutthewindow.Andthereissomethingspecialsharingthatwithsomeone—itbuildstrustandafamiliarity.IwouldhavethebestconversationswithShez,Awaisandtheboyseatingacaseofmangoesduringthelateeveninghours..

Q:Thebookiswritteninavividnarrativestyle—onethatcouldbemistakenforfiction—yetit’satruestory.Talkaboutyourresearchandhowyouwereabletopiecetogethertheeventsinthebookinsuchanatmosphericwaywhileremainingpainstakinglyaccurateandcarefulinyourresearchandreporting.

A. InmyseveralyearslivinginPakistan,Iconductedhundredsofinterviewswiththefamily,communitymembers,andfriendstogarneraccurateaccountsoftheevents.Inaddition,IbecameclosewiththeRezafamilyduringmytimeinLahoreandwasabletobuildalong-termrelationshipwiththem.Trust

waskey.Withoutthat,itwouldhavebeendifficulttogettheircandidviewsandthoughtsabouttheevents.Iholdthatverydearly.

Q:MostAmericans’experiencewithPakistanisthroughnewsheadlines—geopoliticalreportsofsuicidebombings,extremism,andthecountry’sroleintheglobalterrorism.InTheBargainfromtheBazaar,youdivedeepbeyondtheheadlinesandbringintosharpfocusanordinarymiddle-classfamilyandhumanizetheirexperience.Talkaboutyourdecisiontowriteaboutthisonefamily.Howdoyouhopethisinfluencesthereaders’understandingofPakistan?

A.IimaginedPakistantobefullofchaosandacountrythatmightbeoutofthemiddleages,somethingImightseeinLordoftheRingsorlikeDistrict11inHungerGames.Icouldn’timaginehoweverydaypeoplewereabletosurvivethechaos.TheRezasshowedmesomethingdifferent—anewsideofPakistanIhadneverimagined.Thebeauty,thecolors,thefreespiritofmovementdespitealltheviolenceandattacks.IwantedtobringtolifethePakistanthatIsawandexperienced.IwantedtobringthatdinnertableconversationtomiddleclasspeopleIgrewupwithinAmerica’sheartland.

Q:AwaisReza’sthreesons–Salman,Daniyal,andKamran—embarkonverydifferentlifepaths.HowarethesemenemblematicofPakistanisocietytoday?

A.Eachofthesons,intheiruniqueway,hastotakeownershipfortheirchoices,whethergoodorbad.ThisisoneofthekeystoTheBargainfromtheBazaar—thepathsthateachofuschoose,thatuniquejourney.

IidentifymostwithKamranbecauseherepresentsavibrantenergyamongyoungpeoplefilledwithcuriosity,determinationandahopefulfuture.Kamranseesallthechaosaroundhimandstillremainshopefultoworktowardsamorepluralisticandhopefulfuture.Hedoesn’tleteventsgethimdown.Iwasheartenedtoseehowheresponded.

Q:DuringthistimeofturmoilfortheRezas,thereweresomanyopportunitiesforthefamilytofracture.YetAwaisandShezremaincommittedtotheirsons—especiallyDani.Andthebrothers—despitetheirdifferencesinlifechoicesandfrustrationswithoneanother’sdecisions—maintainafoundationofloveandcareforoneanother.Howdidtheynotallowthisincrediblydarkexperiencetearthefamilyapart?

A.Thefamilyshowedtremendousresilienceandcourage.Ittaughtsomethingimportantabouthowtokeepongoingon,daytoday—diggingdeepdowntokeephopefulaboutthenextdayandnotfallcompletelyapart.IknowthatIwouldhaveshriveledwhenfacingthosetypesofhurdles,buttheydidnot.Ithinktheytrulybelievedthatitwastheirresponsibilitytotheircommunity,familyandcity.LahoreisaproudplaceandtheRezasrepresent,whateverydayfolkskeeponsaying,“Ifyouhaven’tseenLahore,youhaven’tseentheworld”.Lahorisareproudoftheircourageandresilience.

Q:Talkaboutthewomeninthisstory—particularlyShezandRania.Thoughtheydon’ttakecenterstageinthisstory,theyplayanimportantrole,asbotharebuckingsocietalnormsandexpectations.Canyou

tellusmoreaboutthesestrongwomenandhowtheyrepresent—ordon’trepresent—womeninPakistantoday.

A.ShezandRaniaareexemplary.Shezremainstherockofthefamily,thequietstrengththatholdsthecoretogether.Raniaisastrong,smart,ambitiousyoungwoman—andImethundredsofRaniaswhenIwasinPakistan.Idothinksheisrepresentativeofthenewgeneration—womennowmakeupahigherpercentageincertaingraduateschools(likemedicalschool).Whilethereremainhugechallengesinwomen’seducation,particularlyinruralareas—looknofurtherthanMalalaYousafzai’sstory—IdobelieveShezandRaniarepresentthecoreofstrongwomenthatmakeSouthAsiansociety.

Raniacontinuestoblossomandrepresentsanewclassofworkingwomanthatcontinuestomakeitsmarkinpolicyandadvocacycircles.YoungwomenlikeRaniawanttoseechange.Theyaretiredofhearingexcusesaboutwhythingsarealwaysthesame.

Q:Afterreadingthisincrediblestory,thereadergetsasensethatthedestinyofPakistanliesinthehandsofthecountry’syoungergenerations—perhapsmorethaneverbefore.Doyouagree?Why?HowwillyoungpeopleshapethefutureofPakistan?

A.Theyoungergenerationisabsolutelythekeytothefuture.Over60%ofPakistanisundertheageof30andthecountryhasover110millionyoungpeople.Theyarefullofenergy,lookingforopportunityandrestless.Ibelieveinasmallway,theRezabrothersandRaniarepresentthespectrumofyouthinPakistan.

ImeetsomanyyoungpeoplelikeRania,KamranandMalalaYousafzaiwhomakemeoptimisticaboutPakistan’sfuture.Theyoungpeoplearesovibrant.Theyarefullofhope.Despiteseeingallthechallengesaroundthem,theysoldieron,makingthebestoftheircircumstances.Theyturnthedifficultcircumstancesintoopportunities—toseekcreativeanswers,think‘outsidethebox’andlookforfreshwaystoaccomplishtheirgoals.AsanAmerican,Ifeelincrediblyblessedtohavegrownupwithsomuchopportunity—itleavesmeinevenmoreaweofwhatyoungpeopleinPakistanaccomplishagainstallodds.

Q:TalkabouttheRezafamilytoday—havetheyreadthebook?Whathastheirreactiontothebookbeen?Whataretheirlivesliketoday?

A.Yes,theRezashavefollowedthebookclosely—theyhadreadvariousscriptsandIwantedtomakesuretheysignedoffoneverythingweputinthemanuscript.Theyweregladtheirstorywastoldandattimesitwasdifficulttoread,astheywererelivingmanyoftheupsanddownsthefamilywentthrough.TodaytheyremainasresilientaseverandcontinuetohavefaithinabetterPakistan.Italwaysleavesmeamazedhowcautiouslyoptimistictheyremain.

IfeellikeIampartoftheRezafamily,assomeonethathasbeenacceptedintotheirextendedfamily.IlookforwardtotravelingtoPakistan,whereIcancatchupwiththewholefamily.Weareallonseparatejourneysthatconnectfromtimetotime.IrealizedlivinginPakistanthatourworldsare

interconnected—whathappensinPakistanaffectsusintheUnitedStatesandwhathappensintheUnitedStatesaffectspeopleinPakistan.

Q:WhatwasyourmostmemorablemomentduringyourtimeinPakistan?

A.Itcameatthemostunusualoftimes.IwasinAnarkaliBazaar,asIwouldoftenspendtimeperusingthebazaarandenjoyingthesightsandsmells.Iwassittingonawoodenbox,catchingmybreathduringtheintenseheatofthemid-dayafternoon.Temperaturesroutinelygetto120degreesandyoucanfeelthesweatbeingpulledoutofyou.AsIwasplottingwhichfreshjuicestandtovisitnext,Iheardasongplayinginthebackground.Themelodywasfamiliar.CouldthisbeAmericancountrymusic?Ithought.InthemiddleoftheoldestbazaarinPakistan?Atfirst,IthoughtImightbelightheaded,giventheheatandthefactthatImissedhomequiteabitwhiletraveling.Butthesongcontinued—IknewthesongbecauseitwasGarthBrooksandmyfamilygrewuplisteningtocountrymusic.

MyyoungerbrotherMuneer,whowasbornwithDownsSyndromeandacongenitalheartdefect,spentmanyyearsinChildren’sHospitalinSeattle.Countrymusicwastheonethingthatsoothedhim.WeallembracedthemelodicmusicbecauseofMuneer.Andnow,halfaworldawayinanalmostancientpartofPakistan,IhearGarthBrookssinging“TheDance.”Tomakesure,Iwalkedaroundthestallsnearbytryingtoseeexactlywherethemusicwascomingfrom.AndindeedIfoundasmallstallwheretheownerhadhisCDplayerinandGarthBrookswasbeltingoutlyrics.Iaskedtheownerifheknewwhatsonghewasplaying,buthegavemeafunnylookandcontinuedcleaninghisstore.Itwasatthemoment,Iknewthatmyworldshadcollided.Myheartwassmiling.

Thismomenttrulyreinforcedformetheideathatweareallinterconnectedinthisworld—toviewPakistanifamiliesliketheRezasassodifferentfromyourownfamilyhereinAmericaistooverlookfundamentalsimilaritiesbetweenallofusashumans.Theworldismuchsmallerthanwethinkandouractions—bothinPakistanandintheUSexistsinavacuum.

Q:Whatultimatemessagewouldyoulikethereadertotakeawayfromthebook?

A.Forme,themainmessageisoneofresilience.Inthefaceofseeminglyunendinghurdles,everydaypeopleinPakistanhavefoundawaytopersevere—theyremainunbrokenbyheartbreakingeventsaroundthem.Ittaughtmealotaboutcourageandalwaysremaininghopefulaboutthefuture.Itiseasytogetdownaboutthingshappeningintheworld,especiallyinAfghanistanandPakistan.Itseemsallthenewsstoriesgetprogressivelyworse,withbombingafterbombingdominatingtheheadlines.Butwhatthenewsmediadoesn’tcoveristhestoriesofremarkableeverydayfamilies,liketheRezasandhowtheychoosetocontinuelivingtheirlives.

TheRezasshowadifferentsideofwhatisgoingoninPakistanandthehardchoicesfamilieshavetomake.Whilemostpeoplewouldwiltunderthepressureanduncertainty,thesefamiliesareabletotapintoareservoirofhope—theylooktothefutureandknowthatthingswillgetbetter.Theabilitytonotlosethislaser-likefocusisexceptional.AndIthinkwiththerightapproach,wecanincorporatethatattitudeintoourlivesaswell.