OUR EARLIEST EXPERIENCES SHAPE OUR BRAINS: THE GOOD AND THE BAD
SO DO OUR ANCESTORS EXPERIENCES: EPIGENETICS IS REAL
WE ADAPT TO SURVIVE
ADVERSITY IS UNIVERSAL: THIS IS A STORY OF US
OUR BRAINS ARE AMAZING: RESILIENCE CAN BE BUILT AT ANY AGE & BY ANYONE
WE HEAL TOGETHER
RECAP
A little more about you…
I do this work because I care deeply about myfellow humans. I want to do everything I can to
make sure we all feel a sense of belonging & have the things we need to thrive.
I do this work because I am trying my hardest to be the adult I needed when I was young.
KATHY SZENDA WILSON’S WHY8.18.21
KNOW YOUR WHY
REFLECTION
How might your social identities impact your professional interactions?
How might social identities be at play with the families we serve? What might we do about that?
• THINGS WE INHERIT
WHAT WOULD YOU ‘WANT TO” PASS ON TO THE NEXT GENERATION?
WHAT WILL YOU DO TO ENSURE THOSE THINGS ARE PASSED ON?
WHAT DO YOU NOT WANT TO PASS ONTO THE NEXT GENERATION?
WHAT ACTIONS WILL YOU TAKE TOENSURE YOU BREAK THOSE CYCLES?
WHY CHANGE IS SO HARD
SOCIO-ECOLOGICAL MODEL
SYMPTOMS OF COLLABORATIV
E CRISIS
ELEMENTS OF A SUCCESSFUL COLLABORATIVE
SHAREDVISION + ACTION
PLAN + RESOURCES + COMPETENCE + MOTIVATIO
N
CONFUSION MISSING + Action Plan + Resources + Competence + Motivation
FALSE STARTS Shared Vision + MISSING + Resources + Competence + Motivation
FRUSTRATION Shared Vision + Action Plan + MISSING + Competence + Motivation
ANXIETY Shared Vision + Action Plan + Resources + MISSING + Motivation
SLOW CHANGE Shared Vision + Action
Plan + Resources + Competence + MISSING
TASK SIGNIFICANCE• DOES THE WORK YOU DO CREATE MEANING OR IMPACT?
TASK IDENTITY• DO YOU FEEL OWNERSHIP (EMOTIONALLY) IN THE WORK YOU’RE DOING?
AUTONOMY• DO YOU HAVE FREEDOM TO MAKE CHOICES?
SKILL VARIETY• IS THE TASK MONOTONOUS?
FEEDBACK• ARE YOU IN A PLACE TO SAFELY & EASILY GET FEEDBACK & USE IT TO IMPROVE?
Oldham and Hackman (from Seth Godin’s 8/14/21 blog )
What happened to you?
What’s wrong with you?
How were you loved?
RESPONSE EXAMPLES
A: I’m anxious about getting to the airport on timeB: I’ll drive you
A: Check out this bruise from my fall down the stairsB: That’s tiny, look at what I got when I was hit by a bike
A: I couldn’t get a taxi for hours last night & had to walk home at 5 amB: That sounds like the time when…
A: I feel terrible that my student failed his examB: You’re not to blame, you’re a brilliant tutor
A: The dentist told me I need to have very painful root canal surgeryB: Oh man, that’s terrible
A: I can’t get my mom to listen to my point of viewB: What’s the problem, exactly?
A: My boss has cut my payB: Buck up, let’s play some pool
A: I don’t know anybody at my new collegeB: See it as a chance to develop your social skills
A: I’m annoyed because you left the kids waiting an hour after schoolB: That’s only because the traffic was terrible
A: I can’t understand where all my money goes after I get paidB: I reckon you should create a budget
A: I think your essay about the greenhouse could be improvedB: It was about a glasshouse, not a greenhouse
A: My whole house is flooded and everything in it is soakedB: Do you feel stressed out and in need of some support?
RESPONSE TYPES
1 STEP IN THEIR SHOES
2 FACT-CHECK YOUR INTERPRETATIONS
3 GIVE YOUR FULL ATTENTION
4 CLARIFY WHAT THEY’VE SAID
5 CLARIFY WHAT YOU’VE SAID
HANDOUT
FEELING HELPLESS AND HOPELESS A SENSE THAT ONE CAN NEVER DO
ENOUGH HYPER-VIGILANCE DIMISHED CREATIVITY INABILITY TO EMBRACE COMPLEXITY MINIMIZING CHRONIC EXHAUSTION / PHYSICAL
AILMENTS INABILITY TO LISTEN
DELIBERATE AVOIDANCE DISSASSOCIATIVE MOMENTS SENSE OF PERSECUTION GUILT FEAR ANGER & CYNICISM INABILITY TO EMPATHIZE NUMBING ADDICTIONS GRANDIOSITY
TRAUMA EXPOSURE RESPONSE
LAURA VANDERNOOT LIPSKY
IF YOU NEED LESS DISTRACTION & MORE INTENTION: PROTECT YOUR MORNING MANAGE VOLUME & INTENSITY OF
DISTRACTIONS NURTURE GRATITUDE EMPLOY DISCIPLINE TO HELP MAINTAIN
PERSPECTIVE
TO DISCONNECT LESS, AND BE PRESENT MORE: ENGAGE YOUR BREATH: MEDITATION & YOGA SLEEP BE ACTIVE DETOX SPEND TIME WITH ANIMALS GO OUTSIDE
FOR LESS ATTACHMENT, MORE CURIOSITY: CULTIVATE A BEGINNER’S MIND FOSTER HUMILITY CLARIFY INTENTIONS BE SELF-RESPECTING & DISCERNING
FOR LESS DEPLETION & MORE STAMINA: SIMPLIFY CONNECT YOUR MIND & BODY APPRECIATE NATURE DRAW ON SPIRITUALITY & RELIGION ADMIRE ART LAUGH ENGAGE WITH COMMUNITY
LAURA VANDERNOOT LIPSKY
MINDFULNESSPHYSICAL ACTIVITY
NUTRITIONGOOD SLEEP
INTEGRATED HEALTH POSITIVE, HEALTHY RELATIONSHIPS
Dr. Nadine Burke HarrisThe Deepest Well
HOW IS RESILIENCE BUILT? (STRESS MASTERY)
TOOLS TO USE WITH FAMILIES
10 WAYS FOR FAMILIES TO PROMOTE POSITIVE CHILDHOOD EXPERIENCES
1) SOCIAL CONNECTIONS & PHYSICAL DISTANCE2) TALK WITH YOUR CHILDREN3) REACH OUT FOR SUPPORT4) LEARN TO DO SOMETHING NEW AS A FAMILY5) MAKE TIME FOR SELF-REGULATION & SELF-CARE6) BE SILLY7) CONNECT WITH YOUR PARTNER (IF YOU HAVE ONE)8) ENGAGE WITH YOUR COMMUNITY9) PRIORITIZE POSITIVE MOMENTS
REFLECTION & APPLICATION
WHAT DO YOU ALREADY DO THAT ALIGNS WITH WHAT YOU’VE LEARNED TODAY?
WHAT COULD YOU DO BY NEXT TUESDAY?
WHAT DO I WANT TO DO BUT WOULD NEED ADDITIONAL SUPPORT? (RESOURCES, SKILL, POLICY)
Q & A
