A Longtime (and at One Point Illegal) Cr - Janette Rallison

5/26/2018 A Longtime (and at One Point Illegal) Cr - Janette Rallison

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A Long Time (And at One Poin

Illegal) CrushBy Janette Rallison

Copyright 2013 Janette Rallison

Other titles by Janette Rallison

Blue Eyes and Other Teenage Hazards

Alls Fair in Love, War, and High SchooLife, Love, and the Pursuit of Free Throw

Fame, Glory, and Other Things on my T

Do List

Its a Mall World After All

Revenge of the Cheerleaders

How to Take The Ex Out of Ex-boyfriend

Just One WishMy Fair Godmother

My Unfair Godmother

My Double Life

Slayers (under pen name CJ Hill)


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Erasing Time (under pen name CJ Hill)

Kindle Edition, License Notes

This ebook is licensed for your personenjoyment only. This ebook may not be r

sold or given away to other people. If yo

would like to share this book with anoth

person, please purchase an addition

copy for each recipient. If youre readi

this book and did not purchase it, or it w

not purchased for your use only, thplease purchase your own copy. Than

you for respecting the hard work of th

author.


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A warning voice might have com

in handy for Elsie Clark, but as she turne

her ancient Civic onto Windham Roashe didnt hear that type of voice. Sh

looked out across the sloping hills that l

in front of the snow-covered mountain

and the voices she heard whispereCome back and stay where you belon

This is home.

Elsie had been ignoring tho

voices since she left Lark Field, Montan

nearly three years ago. Shed moved o

she reminded herself, outgrown the sma

town life. If she moved back hereveryone would see her as the same Els

Clark shed been in high school. Ky

McBride would see her that way too.

She didnt want to think abo


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Kye, but it was hard not to while sh

drove across his ranch. Whenever sh

made this drive backThanksgivin

Christmas, and now for her brotherweddingshe was afraid Kye would po

up somewhere along the road. It was

stupid worry, really. The Windham Ranc

consisted of twenty-thousand acres. wasnt as if the McBrides would b

strolling around the road looking f

familiar cars. Still, if there had be

another way to get to Lark Field, Els

would have taken it.

She drove around a curve th

followed the contours of a riverbed ansaw the cows. Two of them stood idly

the road, each poking through the snow o

the shoulder as though something tas

might be buried underneath.


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Elsie slowed down, and when th

cows didnt move, she idled and gave h

horn a short tap. Neither cow moved.

fact, both turned and looked at hplacidly. She waited a few moments, th

hit the horn harder. It let out a scoldin

blare.

One of the cows turned anstrolled up to the hood of her car. Its so

brown eyes stared at her while it breath

out frosty puffs. It had moved, but the

still wasnt a way to pass the cow

without hitting them. Elsie waited for on

of them to saunter off somewhere,

shuffle by her car so she could scoaround them. A minute went by, then tw

then three. The cows only stared at h

expectantly and mooed.

This was great. With Elsies luc


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if she drove off the road to go aroun

them, shed either get stuck in the snow

end up puncturing a tire. And that wou

be just what she neededto get stuck Kyes ranch.

Elsie noticed movement in h

rearview mirror. She turned around an

saw that another cow had wandered onthe road behind her car.

It was then Elsie felt the fir

inklings of panic. She was boxed in. If sh

moved her car in either direction, she

hit a cow. And she knew the price of bee

The only thing that would be worse th

getting stuck on Kyes ranch would bhaving to tell him shed killed one of h

cows. Elsie laid on the horn again, th

time long and hard.

Nothing happened. She didnt ev


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get a reaction from the cowsunless yo

counted the way they were looking at h

curiously and sniffing the cars headligh

Off to her right, she spotted two mocows ambling her way, ready to join th

others for this impromptu cow party.

What the . . . ? Why had her c

suddenly become a cattle magnet?Elsie put the car in reverse an

twisted in her seat. She would find a w

around the cow behind her. At this poin

she wouldnt mind backing up the enti

way to the main road.

Unfortunately, while shed be

honking at the cows in front of her, anothcow had wandered up behind the ca

They blocked the road that way too. Sh

stared at them in disbelief. This w

beginning to feel like the Alfred Hitchco


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movie The Birds. Shed wound up in

cattle sequel. Elsie honked the horn in

staccato rhythm and glared at the wet no

now eye level with her window. Donyou know that people eat you? she told

Where is your fear of predators?

None of the cows responded

that comment either.It figured that Kyes cattle wou

go out of their way to trap her on h

property. She might as well turn off th

car and wait them out. Only she didn

dare turn off her car for fear it wouldn

restart.

That was the thing about beingcollege student. She couldnt afford a ne

car, and lately her Civic had

temperamental way of pretending

battery had died. It hadnt. Elsie h


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replaced the battery a month ago when

had first started acting up. Now sitti

here staring at Kyes cows, she could rea

her future as well as if a fortune tellwere slapping down the cards in front

her. Elsie would turn off her car, the cow

would eventually go away, and then h

Civic would go on strike and ignore aattempts to coax it into life by fervent k

twisting.

When Elsie called home to repo

the problem, her parents would ring up th

McBrides to have them give her a jum

Even if it wasnt Kye who showed u

with jumper cables, he would hear abothe event. And he would think it was som

pathetic attempt on her part to see hi

again.

He wouldnt believe shed be


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waylaid on the road by a small b

insistent herd of cattle. He wouldn

believe shed had a real reason to turn o

her car in the middle of his ranch. Elscould hardly believe it herself, and sh

was staring at said cattle.

Elsie pulled out her cell phone b

couldnt think of anyone to call for helDid 911 handle this sort of thing? It didn

matter. Anyone she called in Lark Fie

would call the McBrides and have the

deal with it. Worse still, anyone sh

called would ask her why she hadnt ju

called the McBrides in the first place.

Elsie shoved her phone back in hpurse. Well, this is what she got for goin

out of her way to avoid Kye McBride f

the last three years. Fate was having

oke at her expense.


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Elsie honked the horn again, n

expecting it to do any good, but the bla

sounded like the car was swearing, so

was appropriate.Then things got worse. Up un

that moment there had been a chance th

cow traffic jam would clear up on its ow

and Kye would never know shed betrapped here. If things had gone the w

they were supposed to, Elsie wouldn

have to see him until tomorrow night at th

wedding rehearsal where she would b

flawlessly made up. She had planned

graciously ignore Kye while she was bu

being stunning.Now that scenario was shot. Els

glanced in her rearview mirror and sa

him coming over a rise on his horse. Ev

in his thick jean coat and cowboy hat, sh


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knew it was Kye and not one of the ran

hands. She recognized his height an

shape, tall and thin enough that you didn

notice how muscular he was at first. Elscould tell it was him by the way he he

himself, self-assured but casual.

Kye had seen her, had undoubted

recognized her car. It was the same onshed had in high school. Instead

looking stunning, she wore jeans and

sweatshirt, had done nothing with her ha

except run a brush through it several hou

ago, and she barely wore any makeu

ow Kye was coming over to see why s

was planted on the middle of his ransurrounded by an entourage of cows.

* * *

The first time Elsie had ever se

Kye, she had been eight and hed be


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fourteen. Hed come home from scho

with her older brother, Carson, to do ma

homework. Before long the guys h

ended up outside on the driveway shootihoops. Back then, Kye had looked yea

younger than Carson. Hed been short an

wiry with arms and legs that seemed to

long for his body. Even at that, hed stbeen cute. He had thick brown hair an

dark blue eyes the same shade as th

Montana sky right after sunset.

Later on, when Elsie was o

enough to look back on all the times Ky

came over to help Carson study, sh

realized why the two of them had alwaended their study sessions playi

basketball. Kye was years ahead of h

brother when it came to math. Carson mu

have hated thatbeing outdone b


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someone who looked like he st

belonged in junior high. Carson could on

take being tutored for so long before h

had to prove he was better than Kye whit came to sports.

But back when Elsie was eigh

shed only seen that her brother w

outside playing, and she wanted in on thaction. She had two other brothe

between her and Carson, and neither

them ever had much time for her, ev

though she tried to be one of the gu

whenever she could.

Elsie took her basketball outsid

the one with her name written in purpmarker across it. She made a shot from th

edge of the lawn. It didnt even manage

hit the basket.

Go away, Carson told her in th


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cuttingly impatient way big brothers ha

Youre bugging us.

Elsie hurried after her ball befo

it rolled into the street. Three people cplay, she said. Lucas and Mason pl

with you all the time.

Yeah, Carson said, dribbling th

ball with such ease it looked like hhands were magnets the ball was draw

to, but youre no good. Go play dolls

something.

Even though Elsie didnt kno

who Kye was, she felt the extra sting

being insulted in front of him. S

clutched her ball, tears welling in heyes. Her name, so proudly written on h

ball, blurred in her vision until the lette

melted together.

Its okay, Kye said, comin


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toward her. She can be on my team. H

effortlessly hoisted her up on h

shoulders. Ranch work had made hi

stronger than he looked. Now wetaller than Carson, Kye said, so it

almost fair.

She had giggled and beamed an

cheerfully missed shot after shot. Kydidnt seem to mind. He kept saying thin

like, Dangthe basket ducked out of th

way. That should have been a thre

pointer.

He probably had only recruit

her on his team so he had a reason to los

Maybe he didnt like being reminded his deficiencies in basketball any mo

than Carson liked being reminded of h

shortcomings in math.

It didnt matter. After that Els


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adored Kye, worshipping him with

dedication only an eight-year-old cou

sustain. Elsie renamed all of her Ken dol

Kye. Her family went to the same churas Kyes, and while the congregatio

bowed their heads in prayer, Elsie wou

peek open her eyes and blow Kye furtiv

kisses. She looked for him at every one Carsons school events and ballgames

Kye did eventually get taller and better

not only basketball, but baseball too. Sh

cheered for him louder than she cheer

for her brother.

Every time Kye came over duri

the next four years of high school, shhung around like a stray puppy waiting

be noticed.I am going to marry you, sh

told him silently. She basked in tho

unsaid words, felt the power of the


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lifting her.

Kye never did notice her, thoug

ot really. Not in the way she wanted

be noticed. He grew even taller and momuscular. His glasses disappeared

favor of contacts. His boyish featur

sharpened into the crisp handsome lines

a young man.On the night of their senior prom

Carson, Kye, and several of their frien

brought their dates to the house. Elsie s

sulking on the stairs while her moth

cooed over everyone, snapping pictur

and throwing out compliments like th

were confetti. Not once did Kye look Elsies direction or smile at her. She wa

twelve and in braces, complete

inadequate in the face of the glitteri

girls who glided around Kye and th


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others.

Elsies mantra of future marriag

was drained of its magic that night. Th

words no longer had power to lift warm her. The sentence sat in a mangle

heap around her feet, deflated.

That was the last image she had

Kye before he went to college: Him intux, achingly handsome, never on

turning to glance in her direction.

Now that same man was headi

toward her car, and he was close enoug

she could see the amusement in his eyes

and something else, something sh

couldnt quite pinpoint. Annoyanmaybe? Or worse, pity?

If her last Kye McBride sighti

had ended on prom night, things wouldn

have turned out so badly. Elsie eventual


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stopped acting like she wanted to be on

of the guys and embraced all things gir

fashion, shoes, and makeup. She gre

out her dark brown hair and had a way running her fingers through it that ma

guys stop, pause, and take notice.

The only vestige of her crush o

Kye was a permanent placement advanced math. She had devoted herself

math back in elementary school on the o

chance Kye would notice her report car

laying around and consider her brillian

This never happened, at least not that sh

knew of, but by the time hed left f

college, she was too well entrenched the gifted math program to let it all go.

If Kye hadnt come back, Els

would have remembered him as

childhood obsession that flared into an


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out of existence along with her crushes o

actors and musicians. Thats where tho

crushes belongedbehind th

unachievable and anonymous waHollywood had erected.

On the first day of her senior yea

Elsie walked into her honors calc cla

and saw Kye writing Mr. McBride on twhiteboard in the front of the room.

Her arms went slack and her ca

book slid from her hands onto the floor.

Kye turned at the sound. Els

blushed bright red, hurriedly picked up t

book, and slipped into a seat at the side

the room. He smiled at her, but it was jua piece of kindnessa sort of welcomi

smile that saidIm not the sort of teach

who eats students. He showed n

recognition, didnt speak to her at all, un


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after hed gone over the class rules, th

syllabus, and was taking roll.

Allie Anderson . . . Madiso

Basha . . . Tyson Boggle . . . He markeoff each student when they answered bac

Kye paused then, and Elsie kne

he had come to her name, recognized

He looked around the room, trying to spher. His gaze passed right over h

without stopping. Elsie Clark? he aske

Here, she called back, alread

uncomfortable at the tone shed used.

sounded too nervous, too questioning,

though she wasnt sure herself if she real

was here.Kyes gaze shot to her, and sh

knew he still didnt recognize her. She h

watched him grow up during his fo

years of high school, but he had nev


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seen her change from the eight-year-o

hed played basketball with.

She breathed softly, careful

waiting for some sort of pronouncemefrom him.Notice me now, she told hi

silently.Really see me. Im every bit

beautiful as the girl you went to pro

with.Kyes eyebrows dipped togethe

Are you Carson Clarks little sister?

Yes, she said, fighting a blu

that threatened to creep back into h

cheeks.

Wow, he said.

Wow. She could eat that word. Shhad waited long enough for it. Before sh

could hold the word up and admire h

praise, he added, I suddenly feel ol

You were like, what, six when I left f


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college?

Then he went on with the rest

the roll.

In so many ways those sentenchad put her back on the stairs,

awkward, invisible girl with braces.

wasnt a role she wanted. And it wasnt

role she intended to keep.Seventeen-year-olds are reckle

in so many ways.


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Chapter 2

That night at dinner, Elsie had toher parents that Carsons friend was h

teacher. Her dad nodded as though it w

a sad event, one to be mourned over. Ky

was going to get his electrical engineeridegree, but after last year when his fath

had that knee injury, Kye got his teachin

certificate instead. He came home so h

could help run the ranch.

Kye was the youngest of thr

children. Elsie didnt know much abo

his older sister and brother except ththey were both married and living in oth

states. Apparently neither could com

back to help out on the ranch.

Elsie had never thought she cou


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be grateful for someones injury befor

but she was. Kye was back. He would b

teaching at her school for at least a yea

Best of all, he was gorgeous and stsingle.

Elsies mother took a bite of h

lasagna. It must be hard on him to b

back home when most of his friends agone.

Gorgeous, single, and lonely

even better. Well, not really. But sort of.

wasnt thatlong until she graduated. On

nine months. And then she and Kye cou

have a romantic whirlwind summer. Sh

could picture them walking hand in hanacross the overgrown grass on his ranc

sunshine pouring around them.

Kye always loved my homema

applesauce, Elsies mother went on. I


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send a bottle with you tomorrow to give

him.

Strictly speaking, her mother

applesauce was more like pie fillinThats why everyone loved it.

The next day, Elsie was the fir

one to reach Kyes classroom. She ha

been looking forward to giving the bottof applesauce to him all dayhad spe

extra time on her hair and makeup

anticipation of this eventbut now sh

ust felt nervous. Transparent. It was on

thing to be an eight-year-old with a cru

on him. Now, well, this was entire

different. He was a teacher and she wasstudent. This could turn into the mo

awkward hour of the day if he knew ho

she felt. She fingered the jar of applesau

hidden behind her books and wished h


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mother hadnt sent it.

Kye was sitting on the edge of h

desk, flipping through the math book. H

brown hair was mussed, and his buttodown shirt a little wrinkled. Such

bachelor.

He looked up when she came i

turning his evening-blue eyes on her. Hheld her gaze, perhaps because she w

staring at him and walking slowly over.

Did you have trouble with th

homework? he asked.

He had told the class yesterd

that he offered tutoring in the morni

before school. She had considered fakiconfusion so she could spend extra tim

with him, but the assignment was just

review of the stuff shed done last yea

And besides, she wanted him to kno


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how smart she was. Kye, she was sur

liked smart girls.

No, she said. I broug

something for you. An apple for thteacher. She pulled out the bottle an

handed it to him.

He smiled in happy surpris

Your moms applesauce?Yep. She insisted I bring it

you.

Kye turned the bottle in his hand

This is the best stuff. Tell her she

completely ruined me for store-boug

applesauce.

Well, theres more where thcame from. The Clarks had four app

trees in their yard, which meant there w

a lot more where that came from

Suddenly Elsie was glad shed alwa


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been drafted into applesauce dutyt

way to a mans heart and all of that.

Kye put the bottle on his desk an

surveyed Elsie. I see how it is, he saiteasing. Your mom thinks she can brib

me into passing you. It might work. Sh

should at least try.

Elsie smiled back at him, mocomfortable now. I wont need bribery

pass calculus. I learned everything I kno

about math from Carson.

Thats what Im afraid o

Remind your mom I like the cinnamo

kind too.

Elsie had meant it as a complimeto Kyehe had taught Carson, Carson h

taught her. Although strictly speakin

Carson hadnt helped her that much wi

her math, so it was probably a convolut


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attempt at a compliment to begin wit

Ill be fine, she said.

Kye held out his hand, palm u

Lets see your homework.She pulled it from her noteboo

and handed it to him, already feeling

glowing sense of pride. He glanced ov

it, nodded with approval, then set it dowon his desk. You obviously didnt lea

everything you know about math fro

Carson. I hate to disillusion you about yo

your big brotherespecially since he

one of my best friendsbut Carso

frequently couldnt remember which ord

the numbers went in.Elsie laughed. I dont think h

was quite thatbad.

Seriously, Kye said, lowerin

his voice because a couple more peop


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had entered the room. If you need he

later on when things get harder, I want yo

to come in for tutoring.

Ill be fine, she said again. Ia straight-A student.

I know. Thats why Id hate to b

the one to ruin your GPA.

He knew her GPA? That meahed checked up on her after yesterda

The thought made her feel breathless

even if hed only done it because she w

his friends little sister. I can tell you

a smart girl, he said. Sometimes it

hardest for the smart kids to ask for help

Okay, she said. Ill get helpmean, Ill ask for it. If I need it. Fro

you. She obviously needed help, althou

not in math. She needed help in knowi

how to carry on a conversation with h


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older men. She needed help acting like sh

wasnt an immature teenager. Um

thanks, she finished and walked over

the nearest desk. One in the front row. became her desk from then on.

Seeing Kye every day became

sweet sort of misery. Elsie stared at hi

dreamily, relentlessly. Her eyes traced thlines of his hands as they swept marke

against the dry erase board. H

handwriting was a swirl of passion

numbers. Sometimes it was hard to p

attention to the calculus because all th

old words about marrying Kye ke

stirring themselves up and insertithemselves into the integrals on the board

Dx(uv) = u(dv/dx) + v(du/dx)

we will have children with brown ha

blue eyes, and your smile that quirks up


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the side.

The other girls at school declare

math was much more enjoyable with M

McBride teaching it, but none of thewere as devoted as Elsie. All year lon

she excelled in math. She got perfe

scores on her homework. Aced the test

She lived for the moments when Kyhanded her papers back with a smile and

word of praise.

Every Monday she came to cla

early and brought him a bottle

applesauce. She didnt even compla

when her mother made her help in th

applesauce canning marathon. Some these bottles would be for Kye. That mad

the work delicious.

Sometimes while waiting for cla

to start, Elsie would talk to Kye abo


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Carson or her family, or anythingbook

shed read or things in the news. In tho

moments he talked to her like she was

friend. At those times she was sure he fean attraction to her too. He always he

her gaze a little longer than normal, smil

more easily.

Besides those unspoken momenhe never gave her an indication he saw h

as anything else than a student. She kne

there were rules about students an

teachers. She didnt want him to d

anything to risk his job, but she wasn

going to be in high school forever. Sh

could have lived until graduation on teaspoon of encouragement. And then aft

graduation, well, she and Kye would hav

an entire summer before she went off

college.


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Summer. The warmth of

continually swirled around in her stomac

Elsie let other boys flirt with h

in class, even flirted back with thesometimes. She did this to show Kye th

she could, that she was someone worthy

his attention. If he was jealous, he didn

show it. As he told the guys to settle dowand get to their seats, he only seem

annoyed they were wasting class time.

Precious math time.

Dx(u/v) = (v(du/dx)

u(dv/dx))/v2 = we will laugh about all

this on our tenth wedding anniversary.

Things probably would have gonon that way, and she would hav

graduated with her dignity intact, if

hadnt been for that night at th

Mathematics Decathlon.


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It was a couple of weeks befo

graduation. Elsie was on the team and Ky

was one of the advisors. They traveled

Montana State University, and it had agone well enoughor at least as well

anyone expected. The team from La

Field High didnt win, but they made

decent showing. They had fun and got oke around with other mathletes.

Why did the chicken cross th

Mobius strip?

No answer was required.

Mobius strip only has one side.

Dear Math, Please stop maki

me find your X. Just get over her.On the last night, the students had

dance on campus. Elsie had taken ext

time to make sure she was beautifu

noticeable. Here, away from the usu


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setting of school, it felt like anything cou

happen.

Kye was one of the chaperones f

the dance. All night he stood in the cornof the room wearing a white, button-dow

shirt to indicate he was a teacher, not

student. That shirt was aDo Not Cro

sign. His hands were thrust in his pockeand he looked bored. How could Els

keep from imagining what those han

would feel like on her shoulders, on h

waist, slow dancing with her? Just onc

she wanted to stand slow-dance close

him.

She was eighteen. That made han adult. In other times and places, gir

were already married at eightee

Certainly it wasnt wrong to just dan

with Kye.


40/172

After the night was nearly ove

Elsie finally got the courage to go talk

him. A fast song played, not a slow on

which made her request downriginnocent.

Hey, Mr. McBride, she sai

half-laughing as though the idea had ju

occurred to her, lets dance.He shook his head. Im

chaperone.

So, chaperones arent allowed

have any fun?

Nope. Its one of the chaperon

bylaws. I have to be curmudgeonly, insi

no one has fun, and I cant dance.Come on, she said, sending hi

a come-hither smile. Just this once.

wont report you to the curmudgeo

police.


41/172

He gestured in the direction of

group of guys. A couple of freshmen stoo

nearest to the dance floor. Try one

them. They look like they would say yes you.

It was a snub and Elsie felt

sting. Still, she smiled, shrugged, an

strolled over toward the group hepointed at. She passed up the freshm

and walked over to a tall, rebelliou

looking guy standing behind them. He h

long, shaggy hair, gauges in his earlobe

and a beat up T-shirt. She not only aske

him to dance, she danced in a way to sho

Kye that math wasnt the only thing sexcelled at. Every move, every twist

her hips and flip of her hair was for Ky

m not a little girl any more,she though

m done waiting on the stairs.


42/172

Her dance partner said his nam

was Bonolike the singer. She didn

know who that was. He made small tal

which she mostly ignored. She was dancer on a stage and this was

performance. When the song ended, Bon

asked her to dance again. She said y

because it saved her the trouble of havito find a new guy to dance with. A slo

song played, and she didnt even min

Bonos hand on her hips, because eve

time she glanced over at Kye, he w

watching with an ever-present frown

disapproval.

It made Elsie feel powerful. Fso long, she had sat in the crowd watchi

him. Finally their positions we

reversed.

When the song ended, Bono took


43/172

step back from her. His long bangs near

covered his eyes. Its hot in here. Do yo

want to go outside?

Her gaze cut back over to Kye. Hwas still watching her, still frownin

Why shouldnt he see her go outside wi

one of the guys hed suggested? If

caused him a pang of regret for blowiher off, good. He deserved it. She smil

at Bono. Sure.

Bono smiled too. She hadnt se

anything sinister in his smile. Not then. H

made his way toward the door, and sh

threaded through the crowd after him

triumphant.When they walked outside into th

darkness of the night, her triumpha

feelings drained away. She was no long

making a point to Kye; she was standi


44/172

outside with a guy she had no interest i

She looked him over again. Now that th

were away from the dance crowd, h

rebellious-looking hair just seempointlessly long. The huge holes in h

ears were an obvious cry for attentio

His smile was too broad, his gaze to

intense.The cars in the parking lot sat

rows, their darkened headlights maki

them look like they were all part of th

same dull stupor. A lamp in the distanc

cast off a feeble circle of light.

How long did Elsie have to st

outside before she could politely say shwanted to go back inside? She fidget

with her class ring, twisting it around h

finger.

Bono stepped toward her. A


45/172

you thirsty? I know a place we can g

some beer. He took hold of her hand an

pulled her toward the parking lot.

She dropped his hand and gavhim an apologetic shrug. Ill get

trouble if I go anywhere. She drift

back toward the door theyd come from.

Bono let out a sound that was hagrunt and half laugh. No one saw us com

outside. Well be back before the dance

over.

No one had seen them com

outside? She had thought Kye had be

watching them. His eyes had been on h

throughout the dance, but maybe hestopped looking at her when the so

ended. The thought made her feel cro

inside. Had she left with Bono f

nothing?


46/172

Thats okay, Elsie said. I on

came out here because I was hot.

Bono waggled his eyebrows

her. You certainly are.Lame. It was such an old joke sh

couldnt believe hed said it. If he aske

her for her phone number, she wouldn

give him her real one. Maybe she wougive him a list of prime numbers or tu

her answer into an equation. If he w

smart, hed figure it out, and if he wasn

then he could just figure that she didn

want him to call her.

Bono took hold of her hand agai

Hey, I want to show you something in mcar. Its right over there. He pointed to

black car a couple rows back and beg

towing her in that direction.

What is it? She reluctantly l


47/172

him lead her across the asphalt. She didn

care about anything he had in his car. Th

again the car was in plain sight. It wasn

as though hed suggested they go into darkened alley.

So what does L. C. stand for? h

asked, ignoring her question.

L. C.? she repeated.Your name, he said. What d

the L and the C stand for?

Its not L. C. They were clo

enough to his car now that she didn

bother protesting that she didnt want to g

there. It was better to see whatever h

wanted to show her and then go bainside. Its E-L-S-I-E.

Oh, he said, understandin

Ive never heard of that name before.

sorta sounds like a question. L, see?


48/172

This from a guy whose name w

Bono? She never should have said y

about coming outside in the first plac

Making Kye jealous had been a stupplan to begin with. He was never going

be jealous, and she ought to realize that b

now.

They arrived at Bonos car. Htook out his keychain and pushed th

unlock button. He opened the door an

waited for her to get in.

She didnt. What did you want

show me?

He pulled her closer and lower

his voice in an attempt to sound allurinI want to show you how my sea

recline.

Beyond lame. She wasnt ev

going to give him a fake phone numbe


49/172

She jerked her hand away from his. I

going back inside.

She turned, but he grabbed h

wrist and pulled her back to face himWell go back inside in a few minutes.

She laughed even though h

stomach clenched in fear. If she treate

this like a joke, he would let her gothing bad would happen. She tried

pull her wrist away from him. I think Iv

already seen enough reclining seats.

was the wrong thing to say. It made h

sound like shed spent a lot of time maki

out with guys in their cars.

His grip on her wrist tighteneWhats one more then?

She grabbed his fingers, on

managing to pry one off her. Let me go

Ill scream.


50/172

He laughed and she caught a wh

of alcohol on his breath. No one w

hear you.

She kicked him in the shin, harShed been aiming for his knee. A kic

there could have disabled him. Kicki

him in the shin just made him mad. H

swore and shoved her hard toward thopen car door.

As she fell, her head smack

against the cars metal edge. Sh

screamed, but he was right. The soun

wavered, too weak to carry through th

building. Her scream was only a noise

frustration and anger. How had she gottherself into this situation? How had th

guy gone from asking about her name

hurting her? These things only happened

the news, in movies, in warnings given


51/172

naive young girls. Not to smart girls lik

her.

Panic twined through her. Sh

kicked at Bono again, connected wisome part of his body, she wasnt su

what. She was laying half in, half out

the front seat. Instead of screaming agai

she turned and pressed the horn. A loublare sounded from the car. Mayb

someone would hear it. Maybe someon

would come out to see what was wrong.

Maybe was such a precario

word.

Still she clung to it and ke

fighting.


52/172

Chapter 3

Elsie kicked at Bono again. Thtime he expected it. He grabbed hold

her leg, shoved it against the door, an

drew his hand back to hit her. She brace

herself and lifted one hand to protect hface.

The hit never came. Instead Bon

was yanked backward so fast it look

like hed been sucked into somethin

Another figure stood behind him. Ky

Elsie recognized his white shirt. H

beautiful, wonderful, chaperone whishirt.

Kye slammed Bono into the side

the car so forcefully, the thud vibrate

through the vehicle. Bono swore, swingi


53/172

wildly at Kye. He must have misse

because Kye didnt even flinch. Els

dragged herself out of the car in time

see Kye swing his fist into Bonostomach.

Bono crumpled over and let out

groan that sounded like a punctured tire.

Rage was etched across Kyeface. He held onto Bonos shirt with on

hand, keeping him pinned against the ca

His voice was a low, dangerous grow

What do you think youre doing, punk?

Bono didnt speak. Didnt mov

Didnt fight back as Kye reached into h

pocket and pulled out his car keys anwallet. Kye flipped open the wallet, rea

the name on the license, then dropped it o

the ground. He let go of Bonos shirt, b

held onto the keys. Ill keep these so yo


54/172

dont drive off before the police get here

The word police seemed to bri

Bono to life. He coughed out, Sorry, ma

I didnt know she had a boyfriend.Shut up, Kye said.

Bono shot a last look at Elsie, th

darted away from Kye and sprint

through the parking lot.For a moment Kye looked

though he would go after him, but inste

he surveyed Elsie. Only a little of th

anger faded from his expression. Are yo

okay?

She nodded, even though sh

wasnt okay at all. She was shaking. ColShe wrapped her arms around herself.

didnt help.

Did he hurt you? Kye asked. H

already had his cell phone out and w


55/172

calling someone.

She touched the side of her hea

A lump had formed there. A patch

moisture told her it was bleeding. Hpushed me, and I hit my head.

Kye swore and gazed across th

parking lot where Bono had run. He w

gone, had disappeared into the darkness.Kye bent down, picked up th

wallet, then took hold of Elsies arm

Gently, he led her back toward th

building. Everything had happened so fa

shed barely had time to think about it, b

now the last few moments were repeati

in her mind in slow motion. A guy haattacked her. Attacked her. Tried to . .

what would have happened if Kye hadn

come? Would she have been able to fig

Bono off? Or would he have . . . rig


56/172

now, she could be back in that car, wi

Bono hitting heror worse. Even thinki

about it made her stomach turn.

Kye was talking on the phonrelating what had just happened. Els

didnt know who he was speaking to. Th

police? One of the other chaperones? H

parents?Thats when she started crying

not when shed been attacked, not wh

shed been rescued; she cried at th

thought of telling her parents. Els

wanted her mother, wanted her mother

comforting arms around her. But ho

could she tell her the rest? She felt stupid, so helpless.

Kye slipped his phone into h

pocket, took hold of her elbow, and le

her to the building. It was all a blur in h


57/172

mind. The music blaring and bodi

moving. Kye took her past the dance ar

and found one of the other chaperones

overweight man with gray hair whlooked at Elsie with sympathetic ey

while Kye explained what had happene

Does she need to go to the hospital?

Kye brushed away her bangs look at her injury. I dont think it w

need stitches. We should put something o

it, though.

Elise hated feeling like a victim

This was not the sort of attention she

wanted.

The man led them to the nurseoffice and got first aid supplies from on

of the cupboards. The lights seemed to

bright here. Everything looked to

colorful and happy.


58/172

Kye was still clenching his jaw

He handed Bonos keys and wallet to th

other chaperone.

The man looked them over. Igo wait for the police to get here. We

see if they can find the kid at his address

He hesitated, then took note of Kyes ste

expression. Dont worry about getting trouble for punching the kid. He swung

you first. It was self-defense. Neither th

school board or the police will hav

anything to say about it.

Kye nodded. Thanks for yo

help.

The man left and Elsie sat dowon the plastic-coated bed. Kye took out

wash cloth and some antiseptic cream. H

dampened the washcloth, then dabbed it

the lump on her head, wiping away th


59/172

blood so he could see the wound beneath

It isnt too bad, he said.

could have been a lot worse.

Yeah. In a lot of ways. She shher eyes and didnt flinch as he continu

cleaning the cut. Thanks for pulling th

guy off of me.

I was afraid you were going get in the car with him. I was afraid h

would drive away with you, and then wh

knows what would have happened.

I wasnt

Kye didnt let her finish. Why d

you leave the dance with him? You kne

it was against the rules.She couldnt answer that questio

How could she tell Kye shed gon

because shed wanted to make hi

ealous? It seemed so foolish, so pett


60/172

The tears shed cried in the parking l

were back now, filling her eyes an

brimming over her lashes. Her shoulde

shook with the weight of silent sobs.Kye sighed, sat down next to he

and put his arm around her. His voic

grew softer. Im sorry. I didnt mean

yell at you. Youve been through a lotHis arm felt warm and strong. She leane

against him without thinking about it.

I care about you, Elsie. I don

want you to get hurt.

She kept her gaze on his knee

couldnt look at his eyes. She tried to sto

crying but instead made a noise that sounlike a gasp for breath. He pulled h

closer. She let her head sink against h

chest.

He rubbed her back while she le


61/172

mascara deposits on the front of his shi

Its all right, Elsie, he told her again an

again, each time murmuring the wor

with more sympathy, more . . . what elwas in those words?

She stopped crying. She didn

move her head, though. It felt

comfortable to lean against Kye this wato feel the hard muscles of his che

against her cheek. Finally she aske

How did you get to me so fast?

I went after you as soon as I sa

you leave with that idiot.

Kye had been watching her. He

come after her. He cared about her. Annow he had his arm around her and th

were alone in this room. She felt th

steady beat of his heart beneath her chee

She felt all the years of longing welling u


62/172

inside of her. Everything was convergin

in a single point. He was warm and stro

and perfect. This was supposed to happe

Why should either of them fight it?She lifted her head, took

steadying breath, and pressed her lips

his.

For two seconds he kissed hback. His mouth moved against her

tasting of mint and hope. It was a real ki

and she was blissful. Or at least it h

seemed like a real kiss at the time. Lat

on, as she relived those two second

examined them in microscopic detail, sh

was never sure whether he had trukissed her back or whether hed just be

so surprised, he hadnt been able to rea

before then. Maybe his mouth had on

been moving in horrified alarm.


63/172

Kye dropped his hand from h

shoulder and pulled away from her

though she was fire. What are y

doing? he demanded. He stood uputting space between them. Why wou

youdo you want to get me fired?

She blinked at him, heart poundi

painfully against her ribs. I wouldnt teanyone about us. You dont have

worry.

He stared at her with wide-ey

disbelief. There is no us, Elsie. Th

isnt some game. This isnt you blowi

kisses to me during the prayers at chur

You knew about that? sh

interrupted, mortified. You saw me?

No, Carson saw you. He told m

about it.


64/172

Elsie put her hand over her fac

Of course Carson had told Kye about h

crush. Hed always known.

The point is, Kye went omercilessly logical. Im your teacher an

youre just a kid. So none of this ev

happened. Im going to chalk it up to yo

being in shock, and nothing like this wever happen again. Agreed?

As if he needed to drag that sort

agreement out of her. Hed just cut h

heart to ribbons. Did he really think sh

would try for another kiss after this?

She had been so mortified she

rushed out of the room and away frohim, taking refuge in the girls bathroom.

was safer to cry there. She sat on the co

tile floor, shivering, and realized she ha

read Kye wrong all along. Hed nev


65/172

been the slightest bit attracted to her. H

didnt see her as any sort of equal, l

alone a love interest. She was a kid to hi

a foolish, silly girl who didnt knowhen to stop blowing him kisses.

A while later, a police woma

came in looking for her. Elsie gave

statement, numbly repeating what hhappened. She was glad she had an excu

for her red eyes. Trauma over the attac

Thats all that was causing her to tremble

Kyeno, Mr. McBridemu

have given the other students on the tea

some details about what had happene

They were all so sympathetic and kind her on the trip home, asking her if she w

okay and threatening Bono with all sor

of creative amputations should he ev

come near her again.


66/172

She wasnt too worried about tha

After Bono was charged with assault, sh

doubted hed risk setting foot in La

Field. She was glad the two other girfrom the team kept near her. It saved h

from having to talk to the chaperones.

Elsie didnt come to class early o

Monday or give her teacher a bottle applesauce. Her mother had still given h

one--rhubarb applesauce this time. Els

left it in her locker. She wasnt going

look at Kye again, let alone talk to him

During his explanation of LHopital

rule, she stared at her calc book, h

paper, the white board behind himanything but his face.

He didnt speak to her that da

didnt mention the missing applesauc

and the week plodded by on its slo


67/172

countdown to graduation. By the weeken

Elsie felt an impatient restlessness to b

done with high school, done with th

summer too. It was time to start her nelifea new her where she was official

an adult. People took you seriously wh

you were an adult.

On Sunday night Elsie pulled old tanning lamp out of the garage. H

mother had bought it years ago but hadn

used it for a long time. A healthy glo

would make Elsie look better an

therefore, feel better. She took the lamp

her room, twisted her hair in a ponyta

then put on her bikini. She lay on her flounderneath the lamp and pretended sh

was sunning herself on a yacht. A yac

owned by the hot son of some billionai

tycoon.


68/172

After ten minutes, Elsie wonder

if the sunlamp was actually doi

anything. Wasnt it supposed to put o

some heat? It felt like a normal lamp; thsame type she had on her desk.

Then she vaguely remembered th

Lucas, one of her brothers, had used th

sunlamp for a science project oncesomething to do with how different typ

of light affected plant growth. For all sh

knew, the lamp had a regular bulb in

right now.

While she examined it, her moth

called from the foot of the stairs. Elsi

dinner!She didnt want dinner. Sh

wanted to spend the remaining days

school with a beautiful glowing tan.

Carson was coming home toda


69/172

taking a break from his sales job

Billings to visit and see her graduate. H

mother had been making a special dinn

for him, so he must have arrived. Wemaybe he could tell her what sort of bu

this was. Elsie tied her bikini straps ba

up, unplugged the lamp, and we

downstairs to talk to him.She was looking at the lamp, an

not at anything else, as she rounded th

corner and walked into the kitchen.

cant get the sunlamp to work, she sai

knowing Carson would be somewhe

near the food. Is this the right kind

bulb? Elsies first clue that somethin

horrible was happening was her mother

inward gasp. Elsie, for heavens sak

Get some clothes on!


70/172

Elsies gaze shot up. Kye McBrid

was standing three feet away from her. H

stared at her, taking in her bikini an

everything it didnt cover. Carson and hfather paused in their efforts of putti

food on the table to look at her as well.

The lamp slipped from Elsie

hands, which was too bad, as it haprovided a partial shield. The cracki

sound of glass told her the bulb h

broken, perhaps the entire lamp had to

She didnt check. What are you doi

here? she asked Kye, her voice hig

pitched.

She regretted the question as sooas the words left her mouth. Matu

women shouldnt get flustered when th

walked into their kitchens in swimwe

and found their crushesor ex-crushes


71/172

standing around. She should have be

able to laugh and brush it off, to come u

with some clever retort. Besides it was

stupid question. Kye was obviousvisiting her brother, and the way she

asked the question sounded like

accusation.

Kye didnt answer. Her mothdid, while making shooing motions wi

her hand. He didnt come to check yo

homework. Hes having dinner with u

Go get dressed.

Before her mother was even don

speaking, Elsie was out of the room an

running up the stairs.Great. Why hadnt her moth

mentioned Kye was coming for dinne

Elsie knew the answer, and it was anoth

piece of bitterness to add to h


72/172

collection. Her mother hadnt told h

because Kye was Carsons friend, n

hers. Her mother hadnt considered

would matter to Elsie. After all, she wnothing to him . . . just anoth

replaceable, forgettable student.

Elsie reached her room, slamm

her bedroom door, and flung open hdresser drawer to find clothes. She w

tired of being the youngest and alwa

overlooked and eighteen. She shimmi

into her jeans, then flipped through h

closet for a shirt. She needed somethi

nice, something that made her fe

confident and beautiful. Which was hato do at this point. Even the best of shir

couldnt work miracles.

Did Kye think she had known h

was coming over? Did he think she


73/172

come down wearing a bikini as a way to

. . to tempt him? The idea made her fe

sick. It was what some pitiable starstru

Lolita would do. And Elsie wasnt likthat.

She changed into a light blue T

shirt, took her hair out of her ponytail, an

checked her makeup. She reapplipowder, but that was mostly because sh

was stalling, looking for reasons not to g

downstairs again.

Finally she couldnt put it off a

longer. She made the slow walk of sham

back to the kitchen. The lamp had be

cleaned up. No sight of it remained. Thfamily was already seated at the tabl

eating and talking. Did you like th

rhubarb applesauce I sent last Monday

Mrs. Clark asked Kye. Elsie thinks it


74/172

too tart, but I like a little zing.

The bottle still sat in Elsie

locker. How was it that the one time sh

had skipped out on delivering applesaucher mother asked Kye about it? Cou

Elsie believably profess forgetfulness?

Kye raised his gaze to hers. F

one second something was in that gazthough she couldnt tell what. It w

great, he said. I like a little zing. I

surprised Elsie doesnt.

Yeah, well, Elsie had been full

surprises lately.

Elsie sat down in her cha

knowing she was blushing.So, Carson said, shoveling som

pot roast into his mouth. I figured o

why your lamp doesnt work. Turns ou

its in about ten different pieces.


75/172

That would explain it. Els

reached for a roll. It was about all she ha

an appetite for.

Carson speared a potato chunk ohis fork. Hey, when did Lark Field Hig

implement flash-your-teacher-day? When

went to school all we got was crazy ha

day.Kye spread butter on a ro

unfazed. Its part of the new ma

curriculum.

Carson bit into his potato. See

knew there was a reason the old ma

sucked.

They were trying to tease away hembarrassment, but it didnt help. Sh

wanted to slide under the table. Could th

dinner possibly be more uncomfortable?

As it turned out . . . yes, it could.


76/172

They werent even halfw

through the meal when Mrs. Clark thank

Kyeagainfor protecting Elsie duri

the Mathematics Decathlon. Carson aabout what had happened, which mea

Elsie had to sit there at the table an

relive the whole thing again: how she

broken the rules and gone outside withhoodlum, how Kye had rescued her, ho

hed called the police so she could file

report. Kye left out the part about the kis

but it was there anyway. It was there in t

way Elsies heart beat faster every tim

she was forced to look at Kye. It w

there in the sympathetic way he kegazing at her, slightly amused at times,

though he already thought their kiss w

something she would look back at an

laugh about someday.


77/172

Not likely.

Carson gave Elsie another lectu

on safetyshe never got tired of tho

after her brush with dangerand thturned to Kye. Thanks for saving my k

sisters neck.

Im glad I could be there f

Elsie . . . for all of it. Kyes lips quirkeup into an almost smile as he said the la

part. It was so subtle Carson probab

didnt notice, let alone wonder what

meant. But Elsie couldnt stop thinki

about it.

Did he mean he was glad he w

there for the kiss even though herebuffed her? No, that wasnt it. She w

still reading things into his action

although now the book was one penn

with rejection. Kye meant he was glad h


78/172

could set her straight. Hed known abo

her crush all along but had never had

opportunity to properly deflate it. Now h

had.Elsie hadnt expected to have a

time alone with Kye. As he was leavin

though, Mrs. Clark instructed Elsie to g

a box of the rhubarb applesauce and givit to Kye.

You dont have to do that, Ky

told Mrs. Clark. If you keep giving it

me, you wont have any left for yourself.

Mrs. Clark waved away h

protest. We still have plenty, and Els

wont help me eat the jars with thrhubarbno appreciation of zing.

Kye nodded, acquiescing, an

Elsie was sent to get applesauce from th

basement pantry. While she pulled a bo


79/172

from the shelf, she heard someone comi

slowly down the stairs. Kye.

She tramped over to him an

shoved the box into his outstretched armHeres your zing. I hope you like it.

Elsie . . .

By the way, I didnt know yo

were coming to dinner tonight.He shifted the box so he cou

hold it with one arm. Yeah, that w

pretty obvious by the way you threw yo

lamp at me.

I didnt throw it at you. I dropp

it in shock.

Kye held one hand up as thoushe was being overly touchyas thou

he had every right to hang out at her hous

and it shouldnt upset her to run into hi

when she was barely dressed. Im ju


80/172

kidding, he said. I didnt really thi

you tried to club me with a rando

appliance.

She was getting sick of his amustone. She glanced at the stairs to mak

sure they were still alone, then lower

her voice. How could you come to dinn

at my house?He lowered his voice too. Ho

could I not? Your mother kept asking m

for a day that worked with my schedule.

Elsie let out a huff of exasperatio

He was right. Her mother had most like

hounded Kye into coming. Applesau

wasnt enough of a thank you for the mwho had saved Elsie from a hoodlum. P

roast was required for that task.

Kye leaned closer to Elsie,

close she caught the scent of h


81/172

aftershave. Look, when youre olde

well talk about all of this.

He meant when she was matu

enough to realize how stupid shed been throw herself at a teacher. It wasnt

conversation she ever planned on havin

Have a nice night, Mr. McBride, sh

said and walked around him. She poundup the stairs without waiting for

response. All the way to her room

bothered her that she hadnt been able

come up with a better parting line.


82/172

Chapter 4

After the graduation ceremonwhile Elsies parents snapped pictures

her holding her diploma, Kye emerg

from a group of black-cloaked faculty. H

strolled up to her, waited for her parento finish with their photo shoot, and th

shook her hand. Congratulations, h

said. I know youll go far.

I plan to, she said, meeting h

eyes. Im going as far away from La

Field as I can get.

He looked at her questioningly, though he wasnt sure if she meant it.

She pulled her hand away fro

his. She meant it. But just so that h

parents wouldnt think she was bei


83/172

rude, she smiled the entire time she said

Thanks for being my teacher. I learned

lot from you. She had learned she wasn

pretty enough or charming enough to temKye into kissing her. She had learned th

age mattered much more than personality

Did you? he asked, h

expression unchanged. Good. I hope mlessons stick.

And then he was gone, leaving h

with only frustration and a vagu

underlying humiliation rattling around

her chest.

She didnt really go all that far

college, only across the state to thUniversity of Montana, but that was f

enough. During the summers, instead

coming home, she worked in Missoula

pay her tuition. She had only been home


84/172

Lark Field six times since graduation: th

last three Thanksgivings and Christmase

Shed gotten together with her old hi

school friends during those vacationmaking sure she never went anywhere Ky

McBride might be. If he came over to s

Carson, she stayed in her room. She ev

found reasons to skip out on churcSudden sickness, mostly. God could d

without her when Kye was in the buildin

Avoiding Kye had made the retu

trips to Lark Field bearable, fun even. Sh

should have known, however, she couldn

cheat fate for long. Fate enjoys a goo

drama. Elsie had known she would hav

to face Kye at her brothers wedding. H

was going to be Carsons best man. Sti

she hadnt planned on him seeing her th


85/172

waya bedraggled traveler stuck on h

property while his cows held her hostage

Elsie sat in her car, gripping th

steering wheel while Kye rode up on chestnut horse. Kye was close enough no

that she could see wisps of brown ha

sticking out from under his cowboy h

His features were just as she rememberthem: strong jawline, slender face, da

blue eyes that could look into your so

and then come up with a math equation

quantify what he saw.

She immediately felt eighte

again.

He prodded his horse to waaround to the drivers side of the car, on

casually glancing at the cows th

surrounded her. He motioned for her

roll down the window, then leane


86/172

forward over the horn of the saddle. H

amusement showed in the quirk of h

smile. So, having car problems?

Cow problems, actually, shreplied lightly. Do you train them

surround strangers this way? If I hand ov

my wallet will they go away?

Kye surveyed the cattle. Yohonked your horn at them, didnt you?

It was a pointless question. H

must have heard her from wherever he

been. Still, the tone of his voice made h

feel as though shed done somethi

stupid, something that needed explanatio

Yes, she said. A couple were standinin the road. I honked to try and get them

move. She looked over her shoulder

the still-gathering crowd of cow

congregating on the road behind her.


87/172

Well, he said, drawing out th

word, thats how we let them know i

time to eat. One of the hands drives o

here in the truck, drops off the hay, anhonks the horn. He gestured toward th

cattle. Theyre waiting for you to han

out some dinner.

Oh, so this was the cow version a feeding frenzy, and she was in th

middle of it. She shifted uncomfortably

her seat. What happens if I dont fe

them?

Kye didnt answer. He already h

his cell phone out and was aski

someone named Frank to come out anbring hay. Finally Kye slipped his phon

into his pocket. Might as well turn o

your car. Itll take a few minutes.

Isnt there any other way you c


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get rid of them? I have, um . . . She didn

want to admit she was driving acro

Montana in a car that had trouble startin

He would think it was a stupid thing to dand shed already done enough

convince him of her foolishness.

Kye cocked an eyebrow at he

waiting for her to finish.My cars battery

temperamental, she said. I dont want

turn it off.

Temperamental? he asked. B

that, do you mean old and nearly dead?

No, its a new battery. Its th

connections . . . or something, she addvaguely. Her knowledge of car par

wasnt extensive. She had planned o

turning the entire thing over to her dad an

letting him handle it. Her dad loved


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tinker with cars.

Kye pulled out his phone agai

This time when he spoke into the phon

he said, Hey, while youre out droppinoff feed, can you take a look at Elsie

car? Shes having problems with h

battery.

Kye paused, listening. Elswondered if Frank was questioning w

she was driving long distances dow

lonely roads in an unreliable car.

Right, Kye said into the phon

Thanks. He slid his phone back into h

pocket. Frank will take a look at your c

while hes out here.Elsie tapped her steering whee

You really dont need to make him d

that . . .

Kye tipped his hat in a mo


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gesture of gallantry. Its the least I cou

offer after youve been held up

cowpoint on my property.

Thanks, she said stiffly. Shturned off her car.

She had expected Kye to ride o

preferably into the sunset, but instead

gestured for her to get out of the car. Ittoo cold to wait out here. Ill take you u

to the house. You can stay there until you

car is ready.

She didnt move, didnt open th

door. The last thing she wanted was

prolong this or any conversation with Ky

Thats okay. I dont want to trouble youHmm, he said as though givi

her words consideration. I think taki

you to the house would be much le

trouble than having to explain to yo


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brother why your frozen corpse is on m

ranch.

Elsie sighed. She had no choic

She put on her coat, opened the door, anstepped outside. A cold breeze pushe

across her cheeks and fingered through h

hair. A Lark Field winter at its best. Sh

pulled up her coats hood and shut the cdoor. The sound seemed hollow, final.

Kye held his hand down to her an

took his foot out of the stirrup so she cou

get a leg up. Do you remember how

ride a horse?

Its like a bike, right? You neve

forget.He hauled her up on the hor

behind him. Probably. I imagine there

a lot of things you never forget, Elsie.

What was that supposed to mean


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She opened her mouth to ask and th

decided against it. She was done wasti

her time trying to figure out what Kye w

thinking.Hold onto me, he told her.

She wrapped her arms loose

around him. It was disconcerting to sit

close to him, to feel the movement of hbody along with the horses plodding.

She looked at the wide op

spaces around her, the sea of pine tre

that spread across the distant hills. Th

trees were scarcer down here where

was flatter. It looked like a few dozen

them had wandered away from the hilprobably to round up the stray bushes th

dotted the landscape. The sky above h

spread out vast and open. When she was

little girl she used to think that if sh


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looked hard enough she could see all th

way to heaven.

The hills and trees and sky we

all saying, Come back and stay wheyou belong.

Elsie kept gazing at the scenery

she wouldnt think about Kye sitting

closely to her. He was warm and smelleof leather. The last time theyd been sitti

so closely togethernope, there was n

point in letting herself think about tho

two seconds . . . his mouth moving again

hers . . . the taste of mint on his lips. H

he kissed her back or had it only be

horrified alarm?So, Kye said. I hear you

majoring in business.

Hed heard? She hadnt expect

him to know anything about what she


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been doing. Shed hoped hed forgott

about her as soon as she graduate

although she supposed that had alwa

been a fruitless hope. He was hbrothers friend, and besides, she h

given him enough reasons to rememb

her.

You heard right, she said.I always expected you to pick

major that used a lot of math. You were s

good at it.

Yeah, but only because she ha

wanted to impress him. She shrugged.

guess I lost my taste for math after hi

school.Kyes voice had the same smoo

tone he used when teaching and trying

get a point across. Maybe you shou

pick it up again and see if tastes bett


95/172

now.

Was he flirting? Teasing? Or ju

being a math teacher? Well, it didn

matter. She was over him. She didnt cahow he . . . um, math tasted anymore.

She had gone too long witho

speaking. He went on, asking her gener

sorts of questions about college. Did shlike Missoula? How were her class

going? How many credits was she taking

She answered as succinctly

possible, then asked him questions abo

the ranch and his family so she could g

out of talking about herself. It all fe

formal and stiff, like two strangers forcinto a conversation. On the bright side,

least their first meeting was out of th

way. Pleasantries exchanged. Now th

could cordially ignore each other at th


96/172

wedding and be done with it.

Theyd reached the house. It was

sprawling red-brick home with pine tre

planted at each corner, framing it in continual Christmas evergreen sort

way. Elsie dismounted, then waited f

Kye. He swung his leg around the horse

one swift, well-practiced motion. His lewere still lean and muscular, perfection

faded blue jeans.

Go on inside, he told her. I

be in as soon as I put my horse in t

stables.

Okay, she said and headed u

the walkway. She felt the awkwardness every step she took to the door. She ha

seen Kyes house before. When Carso

had been younger, sometimes their paren

had dropped him off here. Elsie had nev


97/172

been inside, though. Was she supposed

ring the doorbell? Was anybody el

home? Probably not, or Kye wouldn

have sent her in without any sort preamble.

She opened the door, said

tentative hello? then stepped inside.

No one answered. Elsie relaxand shut the door behind her.

Kyes house was decorated

shades of testosterone tans and brown

The couch and loveseat in the living roo

looked comfortable and well worn.

stone fireplace stood against one wall.

large bookcase flanked the othecomplete with dog-eared books. Som

work boots sat on the tile by the fro

door. Only the flourish of silk flowers an

the gilded family photos placed around th


98/172

room let Elsie know that Kyes moth

had any part in the decorating.

Kye would probably be gone f

awhile. After all, it took time to unsadda horse, brush it down, that sort of stu

He undoubtedly wasnt any more eag

than she was to sit around and make sma

talk. She would most likely be here bherself for a half an hour. By that tim

Kye would report that Frank was don

feeding the cattle, and he would offer

drive her back to her car.

The worst was over.

Elsie texted her dad to let hi

know shed been delayed, then wanderover to the bookcase to look at the title

Most of them were nonfiction. Boo

about history. Biographies. Ranching.

few novels were scattered in with the re


99/172

ord of the Rings. Tom Clancy. The

might have been Kyes parents books.

was their house after all, but she kne

Kye well enough to know most of thbooks were his. His parents werent t

type to read biographies about Newto

Tesla, or Einstein. Kye had told the cla

about those men, though, used them examples of the way math changed th

world.

She saw the bookEndurance, t

story about Shackletons expedition to th

Antarctic. Without thinking, she ran h

hand along the spine. She h

recommended that book to Kye. surprised her to see it on his shelf. Next

it sat The Book Thief. She had told hi

that novel was one of her favorites. Sh

dropped her hand away. She shouldnt b


100/172

surprised, really. Kye had rejected he

not her reading list.

Good heavens! Who are you?

Elsie spun around to see MrMcBride standing at the edge of the livi

room, hand pressed against her chest

alarm.

Oh, sorry, Elsie stuttered. didnt know anyone was here. Kye to

me to go inside. Hes putting his horse

his stable. Her words fell from her mou

in an embarrassed jumble. She gestur

toward the stables as though this wou

help her explanation make more sense.

Mrs. McBride dropped her hanfrom her chest. Oh. Sorry to snap at yo

like that. You startled me, thats all. Sh

smiled politely at Elsie now. Your

Kyes friend?


101/172

Friend wasnt the word Els

would have used. Carson was Kye

friend. Elsie was a bad memory. Sh

wondered if Kye had told his parenabout what happened between them. H

probably had. Mrs. McBride had mo

likely shaken her head in a sa

understanding way about Elsieschoolgirl crush. Or worse, Mrs. McBri

had become indignant that a trollop of

girl had tried to seduce her son.

Elsie forced a smile. Im Els

Clark. She tried to say her name

though she had nothing to hide. It st

came out hesitant, unsure.Youve come for the wedding?

Mrs. McBride said pleasantly. No flick

of pity or indignation went through h

eyes. Maybe Kye hadnt told his paren


102/172

after all.

Yes, Elsie said, Im just he

for a fast trip.

The sound of a walker clunkiinto the room announced Mr. McBride

arrival. Whos come for the wedding

he asked. He was a big man with brig

blue eyes that peered from a sun-woface. His hands, gripping the walker, we

scarred from years of ranch work.

This is Elsie, Mrs. McBri

said. Shes Kyes friend.

The wordfriend hit Elsies ea

with the same tinny discordance it had th

first time. Still, there was nothing to dbut smile politely at Mr. McBride.

Well, he said, youre a goo

deal prettier than most of Kyes friend

His taste must be improving. He laugh


103/172

at his joke, and it was a booming, friend

sound. His gaze swept around the room

Where is Kye?

Out in the stables, Elsie saiHell be here soon. She didnt want

say why she was here and wondered ho

much explanation was required. You se

our cattle trapped me in a standinstampede . . .

So what do you do? Mr

McBride asked, still smiling politely

Elsie.

Im a student at UM. Im studyi

business. For the first time Els

wondered if Kyes parents recognized heCertainly they knew who she was. She h

told them her name. Theyd sat in the sam

church every Sunday for years. They h

dropped Kye off at her house and Cars


104/172

had been over to theirs countless time

They were asking about her schooling

be gracious.

Mrs. McBride nodded at ElsiAre you staying for dinner? Its nothin

fancy. Just some soup, potato salad, an

ham sandwiches.

Elsie shook her head. No, I donwant to put you to any trouble.

Elsie hadnt realized Kye h

come inside until she heard his voi

behind her. Its no trouble. We eat dinne

every night.

Elsie turned to him, her mou

opened to protest.I insist, he added in the tone h

had used to tell the class to settle dow

and get to work.

What else could she do? Sit the


105/172

and watch them eat? Stay in the livi

room and pretend they were all stranger

So she smiled, waited for Kye to put h

coat in the closet, and then went with hiinto the kitchen.

It was ironic, Elsie thought as Mr

McBride put a sandwich on her plate an

poured her a bowl of tomato soup. WhElsie had been growing up, shed glanc

at the McBrides sitting in their pew an

imagined this moment a dozen time

being invited over to dinner, Kye

parents chatting happily to her as thou

she mattered. It was proof prayers we

answered. Unfortunately, they werenanswered promptly. Elsie had taken th

dinner off her wish list three years ago.

After a few minutes

conversation, Mrs. McBride glanc


106/172

between Kye and Elsie. Tell me again

where did the two of you meet?

Elsie stiffened, mid bite. So it w

every bit as bad as shed feared. Kyeparents didnt recognize her. They thoug

she was dating Kye, that she was h

equal, and now Elsie would be forced

listen while he set the record straight. Thmeal was about to take an awkward turn

Kye stared blankly at his mothe

and then seemed to understand h

confusion. This is Elsie Clark, he sai

Ive known her all my life. He turned

Elsie. Didnt you tell them who y

were?Yes, of course I did. The word

came out more defensively than she

intended. She didnt want Kye to thi

shed pretended there was somethi


107/172

between them.

Mrs. McBride stared at Elsie

amazement. Clark? I thought you sa

Parker. Good heavens. The wrinkles her eyes deepened as she laughed at h

own mistake. Youre little Eloise Clark

It cant be. She shook her head. When

saw you there in the living room, assumed you were Kyes date for th

wedding.

An easy mistake, Kye sa

evenly, except I told you my dates nam

was Lisa and she doesnt get to Lark Fie

until tomorrow night.

Mrs. McBride ignored her soLook at you, she went on cooing

Elsie. Youve grown up into such

pretty girl.

She has always been a pret


108/172

girl, Kye said, stirring his soup in

matter of fact way. You just nev

noticed before.

Well, that made it a family trathey shared, since Kye had never look

twice at her either. Elsie wondered wh

Lisa looked like and how serious th

were.Elsie stirred her own soup, h

gaze locked on Kyes for the first tim

since shed sat down at the table. Yo

dont remember how we met, do you

She asked the question to prove what sh

already knewthat despite Kyes poli

attention now, things werent any differebetween the two of them.

He raised an eyebrow at he

Well, since weve both lived in La

Field all our lives, I assume we met wh


109/172

you were a baby and I was six years ol

My mother probably stopped yours in th

hallway at church to congratulate her o

your arrival.That sort of meeting doesn

count, Elsie said.

Then no, I dont remember.

Proof positive, and a reminder Elsie that her crush had always been on

sided and she didnt need to rekindle

now.

Well, Kye said, prodding he

How did we meet?

Elsie took a sip of her soup. It w

thick and spicy, warm with cheese ancomfortwhich were sometim

indistinguishable from one another. A

long as you dont remember, I can s

anything, cant I? I saved you from


110/172

burning building, and its quite ungracio

of you to forget about it.

Kyes lips quirked in a famili

way. No, Im sure I would remembthat.

Think harder . . . the smoke, th

heat, the flames licking around you.

He took a casual sip of his wateI believe what youre actually describi

is Hell. Ive been there several times b

dont recall ever seeing you there.

Oh, Ive been there many times

Elsie said. Its always a lovely repriev

from the Montana winters.

Both of Kyes parents laughed that. True enough, Mr. McBride said.

Kyes gaze was steady on Elsi

So where did we actually meet?

She had to tell him then, ev


111/172

though she didnt want to. When I w

eight you came over to tutor Carson. Aft

a while you went to play basketball, and

wanted to play too. Carson told me to gaway, but you said I could be on yo

team. You put me on your shoulders.

Mrs. McBride let out

appreciative sigh. Thats so sweet. Shpatted Kyes arm. Its nice to know yo

were kind to someones sister, since yo

were rarely kind to your own.

I was frequently kind to Celeste

Kye said.

Mrs. McBride kept patting h

arm. Oh, Im just teasing. She turned Elsie confidently. He was usuallykind

his sister. I always told my boys yo

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A Longtime (and at One Point Illegal) Cr - Janette Rallison

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