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REENA SAXENA

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INDEX

Sr. No Title of Chapter Page number

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Coaching

21 Applications of Coaching

Why is Coaching Effective ?

Reality Under Construction

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COACHING

What is ‘coaching’ ? Is it training? No. Training is imparting knowledge, andragogy, helping adults develop skills through observation and experience. Is it mentoring ? No. Mentoring is letting a person below your stature benefit from your knowledge and experience, and being there with the mentee, in his/her journey towards success. I see the picture of an onion, cabbage or decorative lights in my mind. No… this is not for a table or party decoration. I see the human mind, being peeled layer by layer, revealing all its strengths, weaknesses, fears and dreams. I see a light moving through different parts of the brain, illuminating hitherto unknown and unseen aspects. The connections created by this process, lead to the formation of a new picture. The thinkers find the solutions or insights they were looking for. These would not be of much value, without application and implementation. The learner needs to reach the goal within a specified time, within his resources and without any damaging impact on others. “Enter the Coach” in the picture. He is the Handholder taking the learner ( hereafter referred to as ‘coachee’) through the mental process, by asking relevant and leading questions, and facilitating pathways of thought. He is also the Monitor to ensure that you act on the intentions in a defined framework of time and resources, helping you to revise goals and plans if needed. The two copper wires in an electric cable illuminate the space around you. Reverse them, and energy gradually dissipates. If the radio waves in the sky are picked up by a receiver with a matching frequency, it creates soulful music. If the frequencies do not match, it creates unpleasant sounds. The coach facilitates the harmony and unity of all related elements, to ensure delivery of the desired outcomes. What the Coach is not ? The Coach is not an advisor, not a mentor, not a trainer, not an educator, not a spiritual guru. The Coach is totally non-judgemental, refrains from expressing his views or opinions on anything. If the coach has a story, that can help putting a framework on the coachee’s thoughts, he will narrate it. But if the story is identical or contradictory to the coachee’s experience, it will not be used. The Coach is only a facilitator, who puts a structure to your thought pattern. How ? By asking questions, by creating varied mental pictures, by reframing paradigms, by paraphrasing your answers to re-confirm and emphasize. The language would by and large be as follows :

I am curious to know … Is that what you are thinking about ? Would you help me in reframing this ? What do you think will enhance …. ? What do you think can be an obstruction ? Can you think of any other resources to support your goals ?

Then, why does a person need a coach ? They need a companion to travel with them, and take them to their destination with minimum interruptions. They need someone to ensure that intentions are converted to action plans, action plans to time-bound activity plans in a logical pattern, after taking into consideration all the external and internal resources and impact on the immediate environment. They need somebody to help them develop on their innate strengths, and utilize available resources. They help in re-inventing a person.

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Every person needs to overcome some cognitive biases :

1. The Escalation of Commitment The tendency for people to continue to support previously unsuccessful endeavors.

2. Hyperbolic Discounting

The tendency to accept a smaller gain in the short term, rather than wait for a bigger gain. The “ A bird in the hand is better than nine in a bush” syndrome.

3. Reactance or Rebellion Reactance is the urge to do the opposite of what someone wants you to do out of a need to resist a

perceived attempt to constrain your freedom of choice. It may not always be in your best interest.

4. Herd mentality

Herd mentality is the tendency to adopt the opinions and follow the behaviors of the majority to feel safer and to avoid conflict. This may be detrimental to your own interest.

5. Self-fulfilling Prophecy

Self-fulfilling prophecy is engaging in behaviors that obtain results, which confirm existing attitudes. One can never break new ground with this.

6. Gamblers’ fallacy

The Gambler’s fallacy is the tendency to think that future probabilities are altered by past events, when in reality, they are not.

Coaching helps in elimination of these fallacies, to reveal a clear path of action.

TYPES OF COACHING

1. Executive Coaching

This could be for the star performers to help them deliver better, the ones in a transition phase, the key executives to manage a crucial project, or anybody the management views as suitable.

2. Business Coaching

This is for helping the executives hone their skills, and eliminate all mental roadblocks for high achievements in business. Applicable to all business heads.

3. Career Coaching

This is to help employees smoothly glide over various phases of their career.

4. Leadership Coaching

To help leaders evolve appropriate leadership styles.

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5. Life Coaching

This is for individuals who think they need a guide and partner, in transitional or life-changing situations.

6. Health and Wellness Coaching

This includes health, fitness as well as spirituality development.

SKILLS NEEDED TO BE A COMPETENT COACH

The skills that a competent coach will need, other than a professional certification will be :

A good sales strategy

Effective networking

Emotional intelligence

Persuasive skills

Awareness of the Johari Window Concept – the four quadrants on how we see ourselves, and how the world sees us.

Awareness of Learning Theories - Kolb’s Experiential Learning, Stages of Learning, Multiple Intelligence theory, Classical Theory of Learning, Bloom’s Hierarchy and Sensory Learning Preferences.

Application of the learning theories to build a better connect with the client, and facilitating his thinking without advice from the coach. The difference between coaching and training is always to be borne in mind, but the learning matters.

Deciphering body language.

Excellent communication skills.

Refraining from giving advice at any step in the coaching process.

THE COACHING PROCESS

The coaching process broadly consists of the following steps, though the methodologies can be modified as per the need of the situation.

Identification of the desired outcome Spelling out details of the desired outcome. Checking commitment level. Understanding steps taken so far. Identifying the internal and external blocks Identifying the greatest individual strength and the external resources. Understanding the impact of success and failure on self and others. Visualization exercise. Action Plan. Chunking down steps in the action plan, with a time frame. Responsibility and Accountability Checking commitment level to execute the action plan.

Summing it up as follows :

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Thoughts Words Intentions Actions Positive Habits Success

IS EVERYBODY COACHABLE ?

No. The giver cannot give, unless the receiver is willing to receive. Certain people are not open to accepting suggestions, or acting on a plan. Some are in the coaching session, since it is sponsored by the company or someone else. The coach can lead a horse to the water, not force him to drink it. Non-coachability is mostly due to the following reasons :

Seeking validation of their beliefs Seeking sympathy for their victimization by others. A previous experience which did not work

Both the parties are at liberty to terminate the coaching arrangement, if they see no benefit ensuing from it.

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21 APPLICATIONS OF COACHING

The Industrial Society says: "Coaching is the art of facilitating the performance, learning and development of

another."

Fortune Magazine says: "One to one performance coaching is the way for both organisations and individuals to

significantly impact the bottom line."

Coaching is defined as a context-free tool, and has fascinated me immensely. It does not need subject matter

expertise, and yet, holds the potential to help people unlock their potential. It is tool for self-discovery, which can be

applied in almost any sphere of life.

Coaching does not work in the following situations, and both the client and coach are free to withdraw at any point :

1. The client is closed, rigid, unwilling, derives satisfaction from proving others’ wrong and places the onus of

change and initiative on others.

2. Non-supportive organizations with a leadership that obstructs change, and do not allow implementation of

changed working patterns.

3. Unexpected, disruptive changes in the external environment.

4. Absence of a functioning feedback system that allows measuring and evaluating the change.

5. Anything that can invite strong legalor constitutional repercussions.

Where does coaching work ? In all situations other than those mentioned above.

Coaching for Survival - People going through any kind of transition in life –whether planned or imposed, will need

help in sailing through it.

Coaching for Excellence is about bringing out the best in a person, tailored to a specific goal

Some applications are listed below :

Business applications

1. Financial coaching

This can be used in Private Banking to devise client-specific solutions about retirement planning, getting out of debt,

multiplying wealth, estate planning, insurance needs, determination of risk etc.

This can be used by Finance Heads of companies to determine the long and short-term organizational goals, and

devising business, financial and accounting plans.

2. Business coaching

This is for every entrepreneur, Business Head, Product Head to devise action plans tailored to the Key Result Areas. It

helps in creating the right affiliations and collaborations.

3. Sales and Productivity Coaching

This is used to devise sales activity plans, resource activation, awareness of external constraints and knowing how to

work around them.

4. Executive Coaching

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This is normally sponsored by the organization, to extract maximum performance from the employees, and as a tool

of retention.

5. Career coaching for employees

This is not mentoring or grooming people for success. It is helping them devise suitable strategies and action plans for

success ( promotions, job changes, career transitions etc.). It also helps them in accepting what cannot be changed,

and developing a positive mindset.

6. Employees working in multinational environments across different time zones and cultures.

A constant realignment, readjustment of waking and working hours is needed. They need to manage their personal

and social relationships amidst all the chaos.

7. Entrepreneurship Coaching

This is all about resource planning and utilization, sales planning, right mental attitude and impeccable awareness of

the external environment.

Social applications

8. Social workers and employees in social service organizations

This could be an individual or a group of individuals, working in rural management, financial inclusion, education,

employment generation, upliftment of women etc. They face roadblocks at every step and need boosters to stay on

the path, based on their professional choice and personal value system.

9. Patients

This can be done in collaboration with hospitals and doctors, for patients in the clutches of terminal diseases, or those

undergoing long drawn out therapies. This can also help victims of abuse and violence , which leave them physically

and psychologically scarred.

10. Religious converts or disciples

They need to develop a motivation to follow a code of conduct, a way of life and alignment to the religious principles.

11. Prisoners and convicts

They need to return to a preferably normal way of life. A SWOT analysis, repercussions of continued unlawful actions

and the benefits of a law-abiding citizen’s life need to be understood and accepted by the convicts.

12. The victims of natural disasters

They have narrowly escaped death, and need to re-start life from scratch. People need a lot of motivation and clarity

of thought , in their weakest moments.

13. Immigrants to different countries/cultures

A massive reorientation and realignment in the thought-process and lifestyle is needed. This includes migrants from

rural to urban/metropolitan areas in the same country, or students moving to the premier institutions such as

IITs/IIMs, where performance pressure is high.

Individual applications

14. Individuals seeking weight-loss or cosmetic transformations

The need for these treatments usually stems from a low self esteem. Coaching can help the individual in achieving

maximum benefits from the beauty/medical treatments, building a positive body image, and accepting what cannot

be changed.

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15. Retired or About-to-retire individuals.

This is a transitional stage in life. The persons might need support in helping them devise suitable lifestyles, financial

plans and social or family realignment.

16. De-addiction cases

This would stop at a level below therapy. A coach can help the addict realize the causes and consequences of staying

addicted, and the benefits of moving towards a non-toxic, de-addicted life.

17. Career coaching for students

Students are at a very raw and sensitive stage in life. They lack experience, and are at a stage, where the decisions

taken, can catapult them to success, or doom them to failure. A coach can help them in an effective SWOT Analysis,

and deriving an action plan.

18. “Empty-nesters”.

Parents are in a transition stage after the children have developed their own lives and moved out. They need a

realignment to living for themselves.

19. Couples in long-distance relationships

They need to make a success of the relationship, by accepting the limitations imposed by the situation and aligned to

each other.

20. Newly divorced individuals

This is about acceptance of their single status, single parent status after a break-up, and preparing the ground for the

next relationship, if a person so desires.

21. The Bereaved

These are the people separated from their loved ones ( family, friends, lovers or pets), by the force of Death, and need

to get used to a life without them.

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WHY IS COACHING EFFECTIVE ?

In one of the workshops I attended, I was given a deck of 75 cards, and asked to pull out one. The value mentioned on

the card was supposed to give me the direction, that the universe wanted me to take for the day or hour. Closer

inspection revealed that all 75 cards had positive values (like honesty, tact, understanding, compassion etc.) printed

on them. All the 75 values put together may well constitute the essence of positivity in the world. It was a

commendable effort to pull out one aspect of the good within us, and let it flow freely in the universe.

Pulling out a card every morning did not make the world an idyllic place. The universe was not returning the favours. I

thought about all the positive values that I grew up with, and lived by, before setting my eyes on this deck of cards. I

could sense a lot of black holes in the universe, that had swallowed up the energy. Did it return Something or Nothing

? What was it doing with all the positive, negative and neutral vibes that it was receiving for aeons ? Where was the

Processor ?

Eureka! There was my answer. The micro-processor inside me was creating the miniscule universe around me. And

there were innumerable micro-processors around me, which created different results with different interactions.

What was my micro-processor made of ?

1. The values imbibed from the environment I grew up in.

2. My experiments in application of those values, and the conclusions from those.

3. Selective reinforcement of some values, which became beliefs, behavior patterns, attitude and then

personality.

4. The interaction with several personalities, each of which had gone through a similar, but unique process.

5. The absence of a positive value, became a negative value. Hence, there were as many negative values as

positive. Black is not a color. It is just the absence of reflection of light from the surface. White is the result of

total reflection. All the colours that we perceive are created by selective absorption of light.

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And also reflections and reactions to the outer world.

1. The filters were the ratios that I experienced, which colored my view of the universe.

2. The choices that I made created my social, professional, political and online circles. These circles undergo a

constant churning, guided by the microprocessor inside me.

The innumerable microprocessors around me have created a very chaotic world. The problem lies in a total absence of

real-time responses from the universe. If I see it quick enough, it reinforces the value. If I don’t , I replace it with

something else.

The concept of Time has been a subject of research for long. Do the past, present and future co-exist ? I don’t care,

and I can’t wait. I know that my life has a limited span, and I create my reality with the limited awareness that I have.

The Universe has not equipped me with a larger processor. Hence, I create my own concepts and apply them in my

unique way. All Philosophy and Religion is an effort to induce harmony for the perceived larger good, but at the cost

of my own. Hence, it does not cut ice with me.

The solution for every problem thus, needs to be customized to suit my needs. And, this is where coaching scores over

training and education. It does not preach, it does not teach. It gives you an insight into your own microprocessor, and

helps you in realigning it to your micro-universe, to yield results that suits your needs.

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REALITY UNDER CONSTRUCTION

Creative Indians get busy in the festive season. And it is not just about good food, clothes and celebrations. We re-

interpret mythology, and test our own lives against the given benchmarks. It leads to imaginative creation of both

comic book heroes and caricatures. The strengths and weaknesses of the hero (Lord Ram) and the anti-hero ( the

hydra-headed Ravana) are re-examined, and we opine on what led them to their respective destinies.

Examples have always been a great way of teaching and learning ------ but not more than Experience.

Individuality is a myth, and yet nothing could be more real than that. The individual remains at the core of whatever

shapes him or her. And the collective impact of several individuals shapes the environment. The relationship between

the unit and whole is symbiotic, and allows the individual to stretch and recreate his reality.

The ecosystem that nourishes our existence is closer and more real, than society and environment. Our life changes

only if the ecosystem changes. The protagonists of Ramayana moved to different eco-systems and reinvented their

lives with adaptation. The story was created in this process of Choice and Change.

Myths and legends are both attempts to influence the individual, the core of the larger system. Each can transgress

into the territory of the other. The dictionary meanings of ‘legend’ and ‘myth’ both point towards the realm of

unverifiable, but possible details of the past or present. It is the ‘possibility’ that makes them exciting and believable.

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The religious institutions and town-halls have been replaced by the social media, with a deeper penetration in our

lives. Whatever our senses absorb and interpret day-in and day-out, threatens to become our ecosystem.

Dictionary definitions

Legend

A narrative of human actions that are perceived both by teller and listeners to take place within human history and to

possess certain qualities that give the tale verisimilitude. Legend, for its active and passive participants includes no

happenings that are outside the realm of "possibility" but which may include miracles. Legends may be transformed

over time, in order to keep it fresh and vital, and realistic. Many legends operate within the realm of uncertainty, never

being entirely believed by the participants, but also never being resolutely doubted.

Mythology

a. A body or collection of myths belonging to a people and addressing their origin, history, deities, ancestors, and heroe

s.

b. A body of myths associated with an event, individual, or institution.

The value of both is in their use as a ‘hypotheses’ to arrive at scientific theories. A theory or evidence of the real,

which can be tested, proved and replicated.

The reality that constitutes your ecosystem.

The reality that needs planned and consistent action.

The reality that is reviewed and modified, as we move through life.

The idealistic Ram is the hero of the epic, but each character of Ramayana was functioning within the reality of his or

her ecosystem. The Uniqueness and Authenticity of individuals remains at the core of every story.

All these techniques are used in the process of Coaching (‘Enabling’ is a better term), to help you in defining and

recreating your ecosystem. The one that enables you to function better, and contributes to a more congenial

environment.

I am neither Ram, nor Ravan ! Nor are you !

Life is all about YOU.

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ReInventions is an outfit that provides Success , Life and Career Coaching to help you in achieving your highest

potential.

Those interesting in the coaching sessions may contact Reena Saxena at the following coordinates :

Cell number +91 9711598390

Email reena.saxena@reinventions.in; reinventions.reena@gmail.com

LinkedIn profile https://in.linkedin.com/in/reenasaxena

FB page https://www.facebook.com/ReInventions.Reena/

Twitter handle @RReinventions

Blogs https://reinventionsreena.wordpress.com/

http://reinventionsbyreena.blogspot.in/