Adoption Identities & Narratives

Friday 22nd July 2016

#mrcsalford

Joe Smeeton

Making Research Count at The University of Salford

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The End of Non-Consensual Adoption?:

Promoting the Wellbeing of Children in Care, PracticeWard and Smeeton (2016)

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Statistics• Currently 68 840 Looked After Children• 0.58% of Children• 5206 Children adopted in 2012• 3470 were previously looked after children• Rest were step-parent adoptions• 85% - Stranger Adoptions• 5% of Children in Care are adopted

What is the issue adoption is trying to

address?• Children in care reported to have significantly worse

outcomes in education, health job prospects and involvement with criminal justice system

• Poor outcomes associated with instability in the care system (Thoburn, 2010)

• Children’s pre-care experiences also contribute to perceived poor outcomes (Bullock et al, 2006)

• Same predictors of poor health and education also predict the need for reception into care (Berridge, 2007)

• Outcomes for looked after children however are improving (DfE, 2015)

European comparison• Adoption rarely features in European welfare regimes

(Thoburn, 2010) other than as a consensual process• UK – parental agreement can be dispensed with• England and Wales has relatively small population of children

in care• Policy is to keep children at home wherever possible or exit

from care at any opportunity through permanence options – kinship care, guardianship, adoption (Reluctant Parent)

• Looked After children are therefore those with most complex needs often entering care later as adolescent erupters with more complex and damaging pre-care experiences and fewer alternatives to live in alternative care.

Ideology• “But in many cases adoption is the best

option – particularly for younger children, but also for some older children. Adoption gives vulnerable children, includng many with complex needs and a history of ill-treatment, the greatest possible stability, in a permanent home with a permanent family. It is, in every sense of the word, for good.” (DfE, 2012:6)

More than a child welfare option

• Personal and intimate issues for adults• Infertility and personal relationships• Social Policy and new family forms• ‘Rights’ to be a parent• Powerful adult led agenda

Clean Break• Concept of possession of children is key

difference between UK and European norms• In the UK the child belongs either to the

birth family or the adoptive family.• Adoption permanently transfers a child from

one family to another.• Care and adoption proceedings are

adversarial

Success• Lots of evidence that adoption can facilitate developmental

catch up• Rushton (2004) found that 71% of placements of late placed

children were intact after 6 years, 50% described as happy• Selwyn (2006) only 6% of placements had ended after 7 years• Factors that encourage parents to continue

• Disrupting placement would be admitting defeat or failure• It would be letting the child down – obligation should be fulfilled• Bonded with child despite difficulties

• Triseliotis (2002) Adoption confers a much stronger sense of security and belonging. Enduring psychosocial base into adulthood

Success• Selwyn et al (2014) post-order disruption over 12 year

period surprisingly low at 3.2%• Lower than comparable placements• Doesn’t account for pre-order disruptions• Children who are more likely to disrupt were older when

entered care.• ¾ of children who experienced a disruption were older than

4 years at placement• McSherry and Fargas Malet (2013) found difference was

small between adoption, kinship and birth parent placements

Fostering• Is the most usual placement• Carers can be highly committed and provide secuity• Often thought of as being unstable• Not seen as a permanence option (is that why it is inherently

unstable)• Permanent fostering has no legal status – PR remains with

the local authority• Foster carer takes on a semi-professional role but given

lower status than SW and less power & responsibility than birth parent

• Children moved due to categorisation of foster carer

The case against adoption

•Challenge to adoption falls within 3 domains that overlap human rights and social work values:

• Legal• Ethical• Empirical

Legal• European Court of Human Rights

• Strasbourg court YC v UK (2012) EHRR 967, para 134:

• “Family ties may only be severed in very exceptional circumstances and everything must be done to preserve personal relations and, where appropriate, to ‘rebuild’ the family. It is not enough to show that a child could be placed in a more beneficial environment for his upbringing.”

• The court has to assure itself that the local authority has explored and exhausted alternatives short of applying for non-consensual adoption orders which are to be made ‘only in exceptional circumstances and motivated by the overriding requirements pertaining to the child’s welfare’ (Sprinz, 2014)

Legal• English law isn’t short of alternatives:• S.20, Family Assistance Orders, Supervision Orders, Child

Arrangement Orders, Special Guardianship Orders all of which allow for placement with family, foster carers or in a range of specialist residential provision within health or social care.

• SW’s therefore have to be able to show robust evidence and analysis of why other options aren’t available or appropriate.

• Philosophical gulf between legal position (last option) and Narey’s (2011:2) “No-one disputes that adoption offers the most stable and secure environment…but too few are given this chance”

Children & Families Act (2014)

• S.9 amends the Adoption & Children Act (2002) s,51a to enable the court to make an order in favour of post-adoption contact at the time of making the adoption order or at any time afterwards, in favour of:

• Any person who (but for child’s adoption) would be related to the child by blood (incl half-blood), marriage or civil partnership;

• Any former guardian of the child;• Any person who had pr for the child immediately before the making

of an adoption order;• Any person who was entitled to make an application for an order

under s26 in respect of the child by virtue of subsection 3c, d, or e of that section

• Any person with whom the child has lived for a period of at least one year

Impact?• Any person who can convince the court that an

application would not risk disrupting the child’s life ’to such an extent that he or she would be harmed by it (within the meaning of the 1989 Act) are likely to get leave to make the application

• This potentially changes the ‘permanent’ nature of adoption to one of uncertainty which leaves the door open for anyone from the child’s pre-adoption history

• Combine this with the unfolding capacity for social media to facilitate unplanned unsupervised contact with birth parents and the ‘clean break’ looks less clean

EthicalShaw et al (2014 a) Decisions are made within the child’s timescales and the courts timescales “But what about the parent’s timescales?”They suggest 3 years indicated for ongoing work with birth parents

Featherstone et al (2014) argue that arbitrary timescales privilege child removal and adoption as the preferred outcome. Adoption without concerns reinforces temporal pressures on decision makers and delimits consideration of support for families

Both, McConnell & Booth (2006) describe parents with LD’s as facing temporal discrimination.

Broadhurst & Mason (2013)

• “Anecdotal evidence suggests that following the compulsory removal of children the plight of birth mothers all too easily falls outside service provision, leaving women to make their own sense of the lifestyle and relationship circumstances that have led to compulsory child protection intervention”

• Many of these mothers face recurrent removals of children in subsequent care proceedings – growing moral concern that this may be due to the iatrogenic effects of compulsory legal proceedings

• ie. Adoption proceedings create the need for recurrent adoption proceedings

• Compulsory adoption is further damaging already vulnerable people (37% of mothers in recurrent removal aged between 14 and 24)

• SW assessments before the court can be ’disproportionately deficit focused’ (Scaife, 2013, Smeeton & Boxall, 2011)

Empirical• Selwyn and Masson (2014: 1714) findings should ‘…

dispel misconceptions about the fragile nature of adoption... For the vast majority of children who were adopted the placement endured; adoptive parents were committed and tenacious, despite experienceing difficulties in their children’s teenage years.’

• Is this due to the adoption per se or rather that adopted children tend to be younger at placement and to have had fewer pre-care negative experiences and fewer placement moves? Does adoption ‘cherry pick’ children who are more likely to settle well into placement?

Empirical• Forrester et al (2009) found that there is little evidence

that the care system has a negative impact upon children’s welfare. It improved in almost all of the studied they reviewed and there was none in which it deteriorated..

• They argue that public care should be seen as a way of supporting families rather than seeking permanent alternatives to its use.

• “Only adoption in early childhood offers a realistic prospect for most children of achieving welfare outcomes at a similar level to the general population.” (2009: 450)

Empirical• Sellick, Thoburn and Philpot (2004) found that

when age at placement and other variables are held constant, there are no differences in breakdown rates between adoptive placements and placements with permanent foster families.

• Long term kinship care placements and short term placements that become permanent found to be more successful for the full range of children than placements with strangers.

Summing up• Adoption for younger children placed early seems to be very

successful and the best outcome for the child• The evidence for adoption being better than other placement

options is less convincing• The legal foundations for adoption are shaky• Adoption due to its presence skews decision-making about

individual children but also limits the exploration and strategic planning for other permanence options (e.g. permanent fostering)

• Do the deleterious long-term effects on birth parents due to non-consensual adoption make such adoption ethically untenable or do the long term benefits to the child outweigh such qualms?

Summing up• Contact with birth family is complex and we may

not be able to maintain the ‘clean break’ – should we?

• Is ‘open adoption’ emerging from the complexity?• Adoption as a ‘happy ever after’ story has a very

powerful emotional pull, despite its complexities. Children can be rescued initially from their birth parents but then from a life ‘languishing in care’.

• The question is ‘do they always need to be rescued from either?’

Professor Beth NeilMaking Research Count

Salford22 July 2016

Where did I come from? Who am I now? Adoption and

identity

What is identity?

Where have I come from?Who am I now?

Who will I be?

An internalised and evolving story of the self (McAdams, 2011)

What is adoption?A legal procedure in which all parental rights and responsibilities for a child are transferred permanently to the adoptive parent/s. Types of adoption:• Step-parent adoption• “Relinquished” babies• Intercountry adoption• Adoption of children from public care

‘Closed’ adoption in England

• Adoptive parents’ identity could be concealed from birth parents (from 1947)

• Adoptive parents often did not see a copy of the original birth certificate

• Before 1975 adopted person has no rights to access birth certificate

• No contact between child and birth family after adoption, at least until 1980s/90s

“Telling the child” (1952)• A child should be told of their adoption “at such

an early age that he feels he has always known it”.

BUT“It must be absolutely certain in his mind that his first mother has gone out of his life for ever… Since the only final parting a child can conceive is death, it may well be that we are justified in telling the child that his mother is dead ...”

(Edwards, 1947, cited in Kornitzer “Adoption in the modern world” 1952)

Giving background information

“The adopted child himself has a right to know his own past. It is part of him and he cannot be a whole, integrated person without it….One of the ways we can help is by showing adopters the need for frank and truthful explanations …and the supreme importance of keeping open the channels of communication between themselves and their children." (Jane Rowe, ‘Parents, children and adoption’ 1966)

You look in the mirror and you can't compare it with anybody. You’re a stranger because you don't know what your real mother

looks like…

For a long time the business of who I am has been on my mind… I feel as being only half a person, the other half being obscured by my adoption

You are one of the minority… And when people hear you are adopted they expect you to be different

In Search of Origins (John Triseliotis, 1973)

What are adoptees curious about? (Wrobel & Dillon, 2009)

• Three quarters of 153 adopted adolescents (mean age 16) were moderately or very curious about their birth parents; number 1 question:

Why was I adopted?

Openness in adoption

Can consist of

•Passing on/archiving information•Ongoing contact through: letters, meetings, phone, social media•Communication between adoptive parents and the child

Pre-school Middle childhood

Adolescence

Adoptive identity in late adolescence

• In depth interviews with 32 adopted young people, age 14-22 (mean age 18)

• Most were adopted from care (mean age 21 months)

• Most had experienced some birth family contact

Neil, Beek & Ward 2015: Adoptive identity

Cohesive

Developing

Unexplored

Fragmented

Who am I? Why was I adopted?

Unexplored adoptive identity (n=5)

• very simple accounts of why they were adopted • ‘at ease’; their story made sense for them• saw adoption entirely as a positive experience• unquestioning acceptance of adoptive parents

I just know that she couldn’t look after me, that’s about it. [And any idea why she couldn’t look after you?] I don’t know really.

Cohesive identity (n=16)

• Why? Concise stories that had been ‘worked on’ and told from multiple perspectives

• Strong identity as member of adoptive family• Reflective about role of birth family• Adoption seen as a ‘better life’• Not tormented by information gaps

When my birth mum was born, her mum didn’t have a very good upbringing so didn’t really

know how to look after her…so when it came to having kids she didn’t know how to bring us up…

she mixed with the wrong people and with drugs …it was safer for us to be adopted.

[Meeting my birth mum], it just kind of made me understand in a way why she did it and that …even though she’s part of my life, she’s not a

big part of my life. (Lauren)

Developing identity (n=5)

• Questions about adoption not fully resolved: “there’s got to be more to it”

• Feelings of wanting and needing to find out more

• Uncertain, unsettled or contradictory feelings about the birth family

• Adoptive families clearly seen as “my family”

I’ve actually woken up or sort of cried in my sleep and I do imagine my dad in my mind… I keep wanting to ask ‘how did my dad die?’ or so many things like that …I do tend to ask

these questions again … (Matthew)

Fragmented identity (n=6)

narratives were often rigid, ‘stuck’ or ‘going round in circles’

some people avoided exploration of adoption strong negative feelings: anger, sadness,

stigma or loss ambivalent feelings about birth family

I have no idea [why I was adopted], it could be completely different. That’s

the story that I’ve been told, but I have no idea. It’s that uncertainty which

hurts. …I don’t know if you understand the degree that it bothers me…and it

can bother me daily, even now, its like a burn (Guy)

Age and timing• As I have matured, the reasons why I’m adopted

have become clearer to me and this is helped me find my identity… [It] takes a certain level of

maturity to understand (Jacob)

Exploration increased with age

• I just had like exams in school and then went to college and all this stuff just built

up (Henry)But so did pressure from other issues

Variations in curiosity

“I was very nosy and asked a lot of questions - I was that kind of child that mum and dad had to be honest and tell me everything if I asked”. (Lucy)

“I only focus on the present, not the past, not the future” (William)

“I don’t know if I want to know really to be honest, at the moment” (Henry)

Emotional vulnerability/strength

I was very emotional and things like that so I just wanted to focus on one family rather than two. (Caitlin)

I’ve had this vision that I’m going to meet my birth mum and it scared me and I didn’t go to sleep for a day, for a night. (Ellis)

I’ve been able to cope with it …Its trying to get through life really…Yeah, it’s happened but you can’t change it, you can only move forward. (Samantha)

Other individual factors

Gender

Learning disability

MemoriesWilling to talk

Feeling rejected

The adoptive family“I remember when I was younger and very confused about why was adopted and [my mum] was absolutely fantastic and talked me all the way through it and said “it’s okay to have feelings about this other person because at the end of the day she actually gave birth to you”. And she said “I’m always going to be your mum”. (Paige)

Young persons thoughts and feelings

The peer groupI’m not the biggest fan of saying ‘I’m adopted, blah, blah, blah’, …unlike

my brother who is quite open about that. (Sam)

Before people really knew what being adopted meant, they had one mindset: “you wasn’t wanted, you was given up” and I was holding back and thinking “I don’t want people to say that to me” (Lauren)

We talked about it if my brother bought it up, …he remembers more…we both kind of went through the same emotions and the same process. …You’ve still got that little bit of your past to hold onto (Lauren)

Was contact linked to young people’s identity development?

Adoptive parents who were more ‘communicatively open’ promoted

more birth family contact

84% of those with ‘cohesive’ identity were having birth family contact

(versus 44% of others)

Young people's views of contact

Good things

Information

Communication

Relationships

Difficulties

Emotional strain

Information gaps

Further loss

Did social workers help?• Life story books• Letters for later life• Adoption folders/files• Life story work:“she’s the only person I can say most things to…I find it helpful to have someone other than [my parents] to speak to because you don’t upset them by speaking to them”

“The only real connection I’ve had is through what we know as the adoption book, which we have upstairs”

Wise words from adopted young people

(Advice to adopters)

Always be open and honest about it... And when they do want to meet their parents -

then stand by them. … guide them through it … I know a lot would feel threatened …but it’s not like that. Trust me, I’m an adopted kid: you was brought up by your adoptive mum and dad and

they are your mum and dad.

If they write you letters, write them back…let them know what’s going on in your life and let them know

that you still think about them. (Advice to birth parents)

It is important that the child knows where they’ve come from and have at least someone

of their blood to know…so if they have any questions of who they are they’ve got someone

to ask. (Advice to social workers)

Thank you!

e.neil@uea.ac.ukhttps://www.uea.ac.uk/contact-after-adoption

Refreshments and Networking

Break

“IT’S A BIG DEAL BEING GIVEN A PERSON”EXPLORING THE LINKS BETWEEN INFERTILITY AND ADOPTION

Nottingham Trent University and Family Care Nottingham

Presentation 22nd July 2016

Researchers Jo Ward (NTU) and Joe Smeeton (Salford)

Purpose • To investigate the links between infertility and adoption • To try and ascertain why such a small number of people

who experience infertility then go on to adopt; and • To make some suggestions for practice

Methodology • Literature review• Face to face interviews (four people) – these respondents

had all had a baby through various forms of assisted conception – asking if and when they had ever considered adoption and what influenced them

• Online survey through two fertility websites – asking whether people had ever considered adoption and what influenced them

Literature review• The experience of infertility and the drive to have a birth

child – ‘pronatalist’ ideology – society expects women to become pregnant

• Rituals such as the baby shower emphasise this special female role

• Men experience yearning to have a biological child

Literature review (contd)Factors affecting decision to adopt:

• New technologies, more options • Fewer ‘preferred’ children available to adopt• Adoption seen as second best – stigma • Unfamiliarity of adoption • Adoption agencies uncompromising

Literature review (contd) Turning points and transitions: • Emotionally and/or financially exhausted • One partner refused to go on• Had reached point of decision and stuck to it • Had run out of options or decided to rule some out • Decided to opt for adoption as a positive choice

Interviews – what they told us Can be grouped into 3 areas:• Pregnancy related issues• Infertility issues • Adoption related issues

Pregnancy related issues

• Wanting to have a baby • Strong societal pressure • Wanted to have a baby ‘for’ their partners

Pregnancy related issues • I think I wanted to experience pregnancy. And I wanted

(husband’s) child more than I wanted my own child if that makes sense

• I just wanted to be, I wanted to experience it all, I really wanted to be pregnant, carry a baby and all that. It were a big drive for me

• People are nice to you when you’re pregnant; it’s like membership of a really exclusive club

Infertility issues • A treadmill, a roller coaster – can’t get off • Knowing when to stop • There’s always a chance it might work next time

Infertility issues • Once you’re on that treatment pathway, you kind of just

carry on with it really

• We started IVF because it just seems the natural step, you know, you go and see the doctor and they refer you, it’s quite medicalised isn’t it?

• You’re playing these mind games, really just thinking “just one more go, just one more go, it might work then”. Knowing when to stop is one of the hardest decisions

Infertility issues Would they consider adoption now they have one biological child?Two issues emerged: Exhaustion • We’d been on this journey for 10 years, an emotional

roller coaster being miserable for a lot of it if I’m honest …..We’ve got our baby, let’s just enjoy life

Choices • We’ve got two embryos in the freezer and I think we’d

probably go for that before adoption

Adoption related issues – process Participants had chosen NOT to adopt – why? Perceived as long and complex, even when they were given evidence to the contrary – difficult for agencies to get this right • I applied for an information pack and they did follow it

up with a phone call ……I didn’t expect a phone call, whoa just a minute!

• It is a lengthy process but you’ve got to expect that, it’s a big deal being given a person

Intrusive• Can we face our relationship being interrogated?

………..you’ve got to be very strongly motivated to go through that let alone the actual parenting

Predetermined expectations of what adoptive parents should be like • The different sort of parenting was about things like

getting in a bath and nudity around the house …..I mentioned it to one of the social workers at the information evening and she was very “Well there’s no question of that”

Adoption related issues – personal Needed to exhaust infertility treatment

Both had to agree

Age Had to consider existing child

Adoption related issues – personal

• I needed to exhaust the birth child route first

• I wanted to be a mum so much I would have adopted …but he was unsure about what sort of parent he could be

Adoption related issues – child • Genetic family, nature versus nurture, and the child being

different• Children have special needs – were they up to the task?

Adoption related issues – child • There is a risk because of what the child might have been

through• I don’t want to use words that are sort of pejorative but

….damagedBut • You should really give them kids a chance as well

because even at that age they are so adoptable• I thought, it’s not just my life I’m dealing with here, it’s the

lives of the child or children you’d be adopting, so you’d have to be pretty sure

Adoption related issues There was a certain lack of trust in the adoption agencies’ message: • They’ll tell you there’s no babies out there but I’ll tell you

there is

Survey • 38 respondents, all female • 9 had children and didn’t want more; • 15 had children but would like more; and• 14 didn’t have children but would like to have them

• 79% had considered adoption prior to or during infertility treatment

Survey Comments confirmed the findings from the interviews, i.e. • They wanted to experience pregnancy; wanted to be

genetically related to the child; or they were worried about the challenges of adoption

• People who viewed adoption either positively or very positively seem to have been strongly influenced by people they knew or family and friends

Summary and conclusions 1. The importance to women of being pregnant and

carrying a baby2. The treadmill of infertility treatment3. Adoptive parenting is stigmatising4. The need for adoptive parenting to be ‘normalised’5. The possibility of adoption agencies engaging people

earlier, while still involved in fertility treatment6. Positive first hand accounts of adoption are important to

enable people to make the transition to a different form of family-building

7. Men are more equal partners in adoption than in fertility treatment

Summary and conclusionsWe (Researchers) think it is important that people are engaged in adoption much earlier in the fertility journey.

• People can keep more than one idea in mind at a time • Adoption agencies are uncompromising in their attitude to

this• Earlier engagement might help people make the choice to

move to adoption sooner – so they can step off the treadmill

“It’s a big deal being given a person”

• For further information about this research please contact Jo.ward@ntu.ac.uk or J.K.Smeeton@Salford.ac.uk

Steve Myers

‘SAS Survival-Are you Tough Enough’: Adoptive parents’ experience of ‘hard to

place’ children

#mrcsalford

• Steve Myers, Director of Social Sciences, University of Salford

• Steve Clarke, Community Relations Manager, Children’s Services, Caritas Care

• Garry Crawford, Professor of Sociology• Donna Peach, Lecturer in Social Work

The experience of adopters who are ‘stretched’ to consider harder to place children

Caritas Care (a North West--‐based voluntary adoption agency) received funding from the DfE to develop and deliver a digital marketing strategy, with the aim of supporting and encouraging adopters to come forward by reducing the barriers and addressing misperceptions that prevent some people offering themselves as adopters

The Project

• Reach new potential adopters using a range of innovative technologies

• Affect the perceptions of people to view adoption as a positive choice for them

• Build an ‘online community’ for adopters to share knowledge, experiences and ideas

• Create a Virtual Learning Environment with and for adopters

Objectives of Digital marketing Strategy

To provide empirical evidence on participants’ experiences and perceptions of the adoption system and process, which can then be fed into developing the new digital marketing strategy.

Aim of the research

• Three focus groups (Morgan 1997) were held with a total of 17 participants, aged between 35 and 50; 3 were male and 14 female

• The participants were selected from a database of existing and potential adopters held by Caritas Care

• Focus groups were recorded (with the permission of the participants) using audio‐equipment, then transcribed, thematically coded and analysed by the researchers

• This research has been subject to an internal University ethical approval process, all data is stored securely, and the participants fully briefed on the aims of the project and their role within it

The Research: Phase 1

‘You had someone for who it was a vocation [the representative from Caritas Care] and for the other [the representative of another North West-based adoption agency] it was [just] a job. For Caritas Care it was a vocation…[they] were just really open’

Many participants held largely negative opinions of local authority adoption agencies

‘In their defence they have huge workloads, but still, at the same time, that is a problem that needs solving’‘[a social worker] came round and she sat with us, talked to us, and she was just really lovely and really warm and explained everything in loads of detail’

Most blamed their poor encounters with local authority adoption agencies on the bureaucracy of these agencies, or simply their heavy workload and poor funding

‘I was just walking past one day and I thought ‘you know what, I’m going to go and have a look in’

Choosing an agency was heavily influenced by recommendations from friends and family and being a locally-based organisation

‘We [also] practice a faith…and a friend who had started the adoption process in another part of the country said that the local authority was worried that they might indoctrinate the child…so we were a bit worried too’‘A friend of mine who was thinking about adoption, who is Muslim…when I said about Caritas [Care] …and I was saying they were really good and you should give them a ring. She’d looked it up and seen [it was once a Catholic adoption agency] and was put off…and just felt it wouldn’t be open to her’

Faith was a factor

‘As I said, we’ve got two boys already...The social worker came round…they didn’t ask us what we wanted and we didn’t really mind…but they said they’d put a girl in with the boys, because…if you put a boy in, they are more likely to compete with one another…if you put a little girl in, they’ll kind of nurture her, and try and protect her. And that is exactly what they [her sons] have done, they just ruin her [laughs]’

Initial ideas of what sort of child adopters could imagine having changed over time

‘Initially we were after just one…but then we saw these [their (to be) three adopted children] and just fell in love’

Participants wanted to highlight how their initial preconceptions/criteria changed over time and for some this narrative was linked with the journey towards how they ‘found’ the child(ren) they adopted.

‘You don’t want to bombard people with too much…if you’re pushing ‘don’t just go for babies’…then I think you can put people off. But through the process, I wouldn’t say that your mind gets changed…but it gets opened up’

Most suggested that the idea of adopting harder to place children should not be broached too soon or pushed too hard in advertising as this may put some potential adopters off

‘My husband was like ‘we are having a sibling group! I am NOT going through this process again!’ [laughs]‘We felt like the whole process was designed to put us off. Like it’s survival of the fittest. If you get through to the actual approval day, then you are like an Olympian… you have made it!’

Most participants highlighted the adoption process as difficult and at times very stressful

‘For me, I don’t think you stop worrying until the final adoption papers comes through’‘I think post‐adoption they should do this more often…get everyone in a room. This is lovely isn’t it [laughs]. You can just talk openly!’

Worries and concerns are varied and very specific to the individual adopters

• Two focus groups were held• 1 group of 6 adoptive parents• 1 group of 5 Adoption Social Workers• to explore how prospective adopters engage

with the realities of adoption and the fact that the majority of children are deemed ‘hard to place’ because of their multiple needs

The Research: Phase 2

My brother had adopted two children who I am godmother to, so adoption is very much part of our familyMy background is sort of emergency nursing…challenging disabilities in children…I probably won’t struggle very much with taking on because I’ve got the skills and experience

Personal and life experiences of adopters are an important factor

When you have a biological child, you don’t actually know what they’re going to look like. And so we didn’t want a photograph to be an influence. The first time we cast eyes on them, was the day we were introduced to them

I think even biological parents…your desire is to have a fit, healthy, happy child

Matching is an important time for reflection and change

The picture (of adoption) that is painted…we didn’t think was particularly accurate let’s put it that way The whole adoption process is so fraught with fantasies and hopes and wishes

Truthfulness about the reality of adoption is important, but this needs to be managed sensitively

Each every evening we were chunter, chunter, chunter at each other. And we were sort of expecting withdrawn, quiet children and they were in your face. They would climb over your children, punch youAt the time when we adopted there was a programme on called SAS Survival Are You Tough Enough, and that’s how I felt it was…it was a bit like you were on some sort of survival challenge

And if they don’t (adopt) that’s fair enough, that’s better for them and better for the child as well. You know even say maybe out of 10 prospective adopters when they are faced with the facts and they hear the reality of it all maybe only five out of 10 may adopt. But nevertheless then, they’re going in with their eyes open.

My daughter seemed like she was Imelda Marcos with the amount of shoes that she had. I was told that they won’t have anything. And they had…We had enormous amounts…enormous amounts of stuff. I kept going ‘where are we going to put everything?’.

Children’s possessions are an important and neglected area of concern

You’re listening (to the social worker) but in real terms your big focus is getting to panel and being accepted, what’s the word, I can’t think of the word? Approved. It’s like a job interview isn’t it?We may have some children with us by the end of the year or whatever and that’s when the training then needs to come in. Because that’s really when you’re most open and receptive

Professional support can be really helpful, but requires focused content and to be mindful of timing in the process

People coming which is really useful in the training about their experience of adoption and that it was quite positiveCaritas put us in contact with a couple who had adopted three children as well. And that helped as well. It was more realityThey (the prospective adopters) always end up knowing how loved these children are and how great it is, no matter what the challenges are

Learning from existing adopters is a key change activity

We’ve got this massive page long list of services that we offer. But paying for a cleaner wasn’t on there. No, but that’s what they needed. But we don’t everyone to know that we pay for a cleaner otherwise everybody will want a cleaner.A family I was working with took a sibling group of three children. (What was needed) was kind of practical support. So kind of cleaning, those sorts of things.

Pro-active, predictive and practical assistance is highly regarded

Signposting them to maybe a play therapist or a psychologist or somebody who is going to work with the child or maybe somebody that is going to work with them to give them the confidence to know how it’s going to help them to parent that child. As opposed to ‘here is the diagnostic label’ and expecting them to know what to do

some sort of database that actually identifies when the children are coming to certain life stages. So maybe starting school. So that we would be pro-active in knowing that little Johnny is coming up for, he’s just about to go to school.

• DfE funding has been used in 4 key areas:• University of Salford research• Caritas Care I-Adopt Website• Social Media strategy• “The Hub” Mobile information vehicle

• This has been very useful in providing evidence based information, what do potential adopters want and expect from us?

• Key messages = “ Realism”• Potential adopters want the reality of the

adoption process and the children in the system. May lead to some opting out early but majority want & expect reality.

University of Salford research

• Potential adopters also want to see real stories, real life experiences and want to hear from real adopters.

• We have taken these messages and implemented them as a central part of our recruitment strategies going forward.

• Has been revamped and rebuilt.• Very user friendly, lots of information & very easy

to download information pack.• Designed to be compatible with ipads, mobile

phones and tablets.• Using Google analytics/data to understand what

people want and expect from our website.

Caritas Care I-Adopt Website

• Now gaining demographic info re: age, gender, when, how and where people are accessing our website.

• Vital information helping to direct our messages and strategy.

• Online forum: has been unsuccessful but we know why. We are new to the format and already well established forums being used.

• We may re-introduce the forum in a different format.

• Exploring the idea of an ‘adopters area’. May in time become a more manageable and relevant forum and may be linked to an online learning resource area.

• Live chat function has been more successful and is now starting to be used.

• The Blog: Is already proving to be a very popular area of the website.

• Utilises the message of ‘real stories, real life experiences’ etc.

• Lauren’s Story very popular.• Great feedback and comments• Will be developed further in future.

http://caritascare-iadopt.org.uk/

• Similar to website: Has been revamped and restructured.

• Use of Facebook/Twitter now fully co-ordinated with a consistent message and themes.

• Links directly to website and our activities in the field with the public.

Social Media strategy

“The Hub” Caritas Care mobile information unit.

• Bespoke vehicle which brings all the strands of our recruitment strategy together in face to face meetings with the public.

• North West region often difficult for people to access our offices and meetings.

• We take Caritas Care to where people shop and work and leisure locations.

• “Hub” is more than a mobile information van.• An effective mobile office.• WiFi built in, Interactive TV. Use ipads and

Laptops.• Helps develop and facilitate

relationships/partnerships with external organisations.

• Visit regular locations where people now expect to see us. People approach us when they are ready.

• Enables us to have conversations with people at very early stage of their information gathering.

• We can introduce notion of ‘stretching’ and reality of the situation early.

• Funding has enabled us to completely restructure our recruitment strategies under the banner of I-adopt.

• University research, Website, Social Media and ‘the Hub’ all brought together to form consistent message and themes.

• THANKS FOR LISTENING• QUESTIONS?

Summary

Lucy Ryan

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Adopting Identities: How People Become Parents

Panel discussion• Joe Smeeton• Professor Beth Neil• Jo Ward• Steve Myers• Lucy Ryan

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Joe Smeeton

Conference Close

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