Amanda Nickerson, Ph.D. Rebecca Ligman, M.S.Ed.Alberti Center for Bullying Abuse Prevention | University at Buffalo

alberticenter@buffalo.edugse.buffalo.edu/alberticenter

Presentation SitePresentation Date

Bullying: What It Is and What We Can Do

What is bullying?

What you can do to: Prevent it from happening Help yourself if it is happening to you Help others if it is happening to them

Overview

What Is Bullying?

Being mean or hurtful to another kid who has a hard time defending him/herself

It usually happens over and over

It is NOT the same as a disagreement among friends or playful teasing where both people think it is funny

What Does Bullying Look Like?

Can be: Physical (shoving, kicking) Verbal (name calling, threatening) Indirect (gossiping, excluding) Cyber (posting rumors, sharing embarrassing

pictures – through text, Internet, or other electronics)

Is This Bullying? Why or Why Not?

Two friends working on a class project disagree about how to divide up the work. One friend gets upset and calls the other a stupid jerk. The next day, the two barely speak to each other.

A clique of popular girls makes friends with a new student and then decide to ignore her. The leader of the clique begins telling others that the new girl steals other people’s boyfriends and is a tease.

A group of students who like to joke around sit together at lunch. The group often makes fun of one of the students at the table who is confused by their joking.

What Do We Know about Students Who Bully?

They may think that… bullying makes them cool and popular they are better than others they can use their power to hurt others

They may have… learned how to bully others from their families,

friends, and/or the media other problems (fighting, using alcohol and

other drugs, getting in trouble with the law)

What Do We Know about Students Who Are Bullied?

They may think that they are… Different Powerless Alone

They may have… Feelings of sadness and self-blame Problems concentrating Physical complaints (headache, stomach problems) and

not want to go to school or be around other kids A tendency to bully others

What Are Kids Bullied About?

Video clip from Cartoon Network Stop Bullying: Speak Up Special (www.cartoonnetwork.com/promos/stopbullying)

What Are Kids Bullied About?

Why were kids in the video clip bullied

What other things might kids get bullied about?

(Note: Please do NOT use names or specific examples that others will identify)

What Can You Do?

To Prevent It from Happening…

Treat others with respect Use kind words Think before you speak (or type or text)

Recognize when you are feeling frustrated, angry, or wanting to be mean to someone Find another way to handle it (focus on something

else, talk to a friend or adult, write down how you feel)

If you have hurt someone else, take responsibility and try to make up for it (apologize, offer to help)

Help Yourself if It Is Happening to You

Depending on the situation and your comfort: Try not to show it if it makes you upset, as that could

make it worse Stand up straight, look the person in the eye, and

say “Stop”(or “Get a life,” “Enough,” “Give it a rest”) in a calm, clear voice

Say something to deflect it or make a joke of it Report it to a trusted adult Stay close to adults and trusted peers/friends

Visit gse.buffalo.edu/alberticenter

Learn More About It

Did You Know? Youth see about 85% of bullying incidents, but

most do nothing or join in

Video clip from Dateline NBC My Kid Would Never Bully Special(www.youtube.com/watch?v=n4kh4r99ZkI)

Help Others if It Is Happening to Them

Don’t join in… speak up if it is safe to do so

Band together as a group against the bullying (“That’s not OK,” “Just stop already,” “Hey – he’s cool – don’t bother him,” “We don’t do that here”)

Tell an adult about the bullying Tattling/ratting = telling an adult to get someone in trouble Telling/reporting = telling an adult because someone’s

behavior is unsafe or hurtful to another

Reach out to someone being bullied (“I am sorry that happened,” “Want to hang out?” “Don’t believe what they say”)

Help Others if It Is Happening to Them

Video clip from Dateline NBC The Perils of Parenthood Special(www.youtube.com/watch?v=pEjVsMtf1d0)

What about Cyberbullying?

Be a good “digital citizen” Only write things you would be OK about an adult seeing Electronic communication is PERMANENT! Report abuse

It is against the law for websites to have personal information about kids under the age of 13 (Facebook)

Beware of anonymous sites (Formspring, etc.)

Use the “off” switch Disconnect and give yourself a break (no 24/7) Do not respond to upsetting communications

Know that You Can Make a Difference!

“Be the change you want to see in the world” - Gandhi

Video of Cypress Ranch High School The Cy Ranch Lip Dub Project(www.youtube.com/watch?v=waAqJ6727Hk)

Reach out for Help

Talk to teacher, parent, counselor, therapist

1-800-273-TALK (Suicide Lifeline) 1-866-4-U-Trevor (LGBTQ Youth Suicide

Hotline) 716-834-1144 or 1-877-KIDS-400 (Buffalo

Crisis Services Hotline)

Resources

The following resources were used in developing this presentation:

www.stopbullying.gov

www.education.com/topic/school-bullying-teasing

http://gse.buffalo.edu/alberticenter

Cartoon Network Stop Bullying: Speak Up Special

Dateline NBC My Kid Would Never Bully Special

Dateline NBC The Perils of Parenting Special

Cypress Ranch High School The Cy Ranch Lip Dub Project

Newman, Horne, & Bartolomucci (2000). Bully Busters: A Teacher’s Manual for Helping Bullies, Victims, and Bystanders (Grades 6-8). Research Press.

For more resources, please visit us at gse.buffalo.edu/alberticenter

Questions?