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A REPORT ON

INDIA VISION FOUNDATION (IVF), ALUMNI MEET

“IVF meri mummy papa aur best friend kee tareh hai” “The journey with IVF is like a magical world. Very helpful and loving…like support to a plant” Introduction India Vision Foundation (IVF) is a non-profit, voluntary, non-government organization. The Foundation was started in 1994 with a mission to 'Save the Next Victim'. The organization is committed to rebuild the lives of the imprisoned and those whose families have a history of incarceration. The primary objective is to provide the target population with social skills, vocational training and ample opportunity, increasing their employability and enabling their smooth transition in becoming ‘main stream’. This was the first alumnus meet organized for all the children who had been supported during their difficult times. This year, it was held on 9th August’15 (Sunday) 10 AM to 5.00 p.m. at Venkateshwara Global School, Rohini. Dr. Kiran Bedi and her passionate team spearheaded it. Despite, it being an extremely wet day with heavy showers, 59 children from all over Delhi reached the venue to be the enthusiastic participants. The day was methodically planned with the ‘getting to know each other’ activities to an interesting array of self-awareness and self-exploration exercises. The day’s agenda had a brigade of exciting activities. It was formatted in a way that every activity led to the other. This helped in scaffolding of learning of the participants.

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Agenda of the day

The Objectives of the meet were

To reconnect with the youth from the programme

To access the strength of the IVF programme

To understand the challenges within the programme

To mark a beginning towards data processing for future impact evaluation and further research

The meeting commenced with registration of participants. In order to smoothen the process, participants were divided in smaller groups with an assigned facilitator. This was followed by screening of a short alumni movie which projected still pictures of children from past. The movie left children with a sense of joy and fond memories. Participants were seen identifying children in the movie and reminiscing on the old times. There were cheerful voices all around. This moment set the tone for the day.

S.No Time Programme Details

1. 10: 00-11:00 AM Registration + Tea Time Attendance record

2. 11:00-11:15 AM Prayer / Collective Song Getting together

3. 11:15-11:30 AM Introductory Remarks Welcome Address, Appreciation for their efforts etc.

4. 11:30-12:15 AM Session I: Ice-Breaking Session

Introduce the person sitting on your right

5. 12:15- 1:15 Session II: Self- Awareness exercise

Who am I?

6. 1:15-2:15 PM Lunch

7. 2:15-2:30 PM Song/ Simon says Getting Back activity

8. 2.30-3:30 PM Session III: Intensive work on self exploration

“Life line”

9. 3.30-4.30 PM Questionnaire On “experiences” + Feedback

Towards future research

10 4.30-5:00 PM Vote Of thanks + future action plan

Dr. Bedi

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The formal program started with an introductory remark by Dr. Bedi. She shared the history of IVF and also introduced the team to the participants. The beginning session had all the introductions from the participants.

Session I This was a whole group activity, which helped the participants to loosen up and get to know others by way of a brief introduction. The participants introduced themselves by their names and their present occupation. It was heartening to see that the majority of them were meaningfully engaged either in studies or in a particular vocation. The participants appeared confident and at ease. After the round of ‘getting to know each other’, the resource person divided all the participants in six small groups with their respective assigned facilitators for further activities. Session II The objectives of the “who am I?” activity were:

Participants to explore self through the exercise

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Participants to creatively explore any medium to express self It was an interesting activity where participants thought for a while and reflected on “who they are?” Fascinating things came up during the sharing time. This activity was particularly helpful in letting them voice out their feelings. They shared their likes, dislikes, strengths and weaknesses. The participants mentioned that there are times when they do not even think about themselves. This exercise helped them to ponder over self and come up with different expressions in their descriptions. The exercise brought about clarity in their thought process regarding “them” as a person. The consequent reflection helped in thoughtful exchanges on how they have been and what their self-perceptions that construct their reality are.

Session III The objectives of Life Line (Self exploration exercise) were:

Participants to deeply explore self through the exercise

Participant to trace certain crucial life events that has left a lasting impact

Participants to get a therapeutic feel after completion of the exercise This was an intense session where the participants were asked to write about five incidences in their lives, which left an impact. The participants were actively engaged in reflecting on life and put down some points/incidences in their life which had played an

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important role in what they are today. Participants shared many stories from their past, which ranged from sad to happy moments. Some shared how these incidences have made them more responsible or indifferent to the outside world. Participants talked about certain transformations during the early years, which has had an undeniable effect on their immediate present.

Analysis General Observations It was observed that children and the facilitators were equal participants. The activities were conducted with great sensitivity and utmost respect for each and every spoken word and the story retold. The environment resounded with warmth and friendliness and the comfort on the faces of children was quite visible. Children participated with an unrelenting energy. They responded with ease and questioned with curiosity. In this way, the transition from silence to a spoken word was easily covered and the gaps of communication effectively bridged.

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Specific Observations Reflections from the Questionnaire Some of the prominent highlights from the interaction during the meet were laced with sensitive revelations, captivating thoughts, innermost desires and the sense of gratitude towards the organization that hand held them during the crucial life moments. A brief analysis of the data revealed that around 71 % of the participants thought that their childhood was not ideal and 90% (approx.) children reported that they would like to change something about their childhood, if given an opportunity. Some of the things that they wanted to change ranged from making a happy household to bringing one or both the parents back from the clutches of the inevitable death. Some of the children wanted to stay with the parents and not in the hostel. Few of them reported that if they revisit their early childhood, they would have liked themselves to steer away from the bad habits of taking drugs. A small percentage of children were clear that they would have liked to bring about some change in other peoples’ thinking on the stigma caused by incarceration and help in bridging the gap between rich and poor. They wanted to change the way people think and move towards being less aggressive. Few of these children wanted to go back to their early years and make more efforts in studying, bringing their parents together for a happy family and making good friends. On the question of dealing with hows of parental incarceration, children revealed a thoughtful side where they confidently marked some of the strategies that they had applied to deal with their parents incarcerated context. The strategy of becoming more positive, directing their energies into studies, becoming more spiritual and praying to God was very prominent. Some of them mentioned that there were times that they dismissed or ignored the pain to focus on what needed to be done in present. Number of participants mentioned the support received from IVF. Some of them also talked about receiving support from their parents, friends or other family members. Small number of children mentioned that besides the hurt caused due to incarceration, they still tried to understand and did love their parents. A thinking that seemed to be helping them was “people make mistakes. My parents also did but I am going to forget it”. The participants hinted at changes in their personal disposition where they used the defenses of being quieter or angry, indifferent, developing patience, taking up more family responsibility or increased self confidence in handling certain situations. Quoting few anecdotes in support of the above statements- “ I handled myself and never gave anybody any trouble. I took care …”

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“ I talked to myself that it is fine, it happens and gave my parents time to improve” “ I took care of my house” On another side, a different voice was also heard which said, “I did not deal with it. I could not deal. I was always very angry” or “I started to keep my thoughts to myself, became secretive” and “tried running away from this situation”. There were some of them who determined and promised themselves that they will not do anything wrong, ignored bad comments and thanked God for what they had. They challenged themselves into action and tried a self-explanation that every thing happens for a reason and good times will come. Around 32 participants of 59 mentioned that they are very hesitant in sharing their thoughts. Surprisingly, around 39 participants said they do feel good about themselves. After the reasons were explored, it was seen that the children were working very hard towards keeping themselves happy and at par with others around them. A few thoughts on this were, making a choice on being happy, by doing a job, having made a decision to remain strong, helping and motivating others, using a modified way of thinking that “everybody does love me”, by continuing to smile and taking no tension. A handful of participants were clear that they keep looking forward in life and have become self-dependent. A motivating afterthought that kept them going was “I need to carve a life for myself”. In order to keep their inner selves charged up, they were trying hard in the places of work or in their studies.

On the other hand, there were others who were unable to take responsibility, felt less confident and were facing financial troubles. This other voice from within the group of participants still felt listless. They reported being haunted by the disturbing past, still resounding with pain. A lingering thought that was distressing few of these participants was that they couldn’t fulfill their parent’s wishes. Many of these participants from the “struggling” camp spoke about persistent confusions in decision-making and a deep sense of latent insecurity. It came as no surprise that all of the participants without an exception wanted to continue their relationship with IVF “ hamme bache ke tarah se bada kiya hai IVF ne, hum poora sath dena chahege”. Their journey with IVF ranged from 1 year to 18 years. According to them, IVF created value in their lives and helped them to grow. Quoting some of the anecdotes in support of the above thoughts- “ IVF ke saath meri journey bahut he ruchikaar rahi, maine bahut seekha hai IVF se, shiksha aur jeevan ke kaamyabi se” “ meri koi pehechaan nahi hoti” “anpad aur bekaar hota, shayad drug bhee leta”

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“ mein shikshit na hoti” “ mein bigad jata, kabaadi anpad banta” “ nahi toh main logo kee gulaami karta” “ zindigi nark baan jaati aur mein boorayee ke tarf khicha chala jata”

According to the participants, without IVF, they would have been either married, doing household chores, being a domestic worker or have been dumped in an orphanage. The clarity on the value created by IVF was astonishing. On the question of life satisfaction, on average, maximum reported being “ just satisfied” with their lives. Very few participants reported being very satisfied. On quoting strengths of IVF, the participants reflected on their experience of past few years with the organization. According to them, IVF does work for the good of poor people. The fact that they keep children as one family and continue to motivate and encourage children was clear. Some of them expressed their opinion that IVF works as a determined team and are emotionally connected to students. Participants specially mentioned Dr. Kiran bedi as their strength. Reflecting on some of the challenges, children mentioned that the organization needs to have more coaching/training institutes. That it should provide higher education. A small number of participants mentioned that if and when they (IVF) hold hands, they

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should be taking them all the way and not leave them mid way. For example, the participants wanted the children to be supported after 12th standard as well. More than 80 % of children made a clear note that they would have wanted to study in English medium. A confident voice was heard talking about the cause of girls, where a need was felt to counsel girl’s family strictly on marriage (someone called it social pathology, because of which girls suffer). A bunch of them also mentioned that IVF team does not discuss problems with children and that the IVF Counsellors should meet children often to understand their (children’s) issues/ concerns. Participants with their keen sense of observations felt that IVF needs to be financially stable so that they can support better. Finally, towards a better tomorrow for the coalition between IVF and participants, few pointers on the opportunities to improve were that the organization needs to be prompt in helping. The children need to be supported in their higher education as well. There was consensus on the need for providing general and career counseling at the right time. Participants also wanted the counseling provision to be extended to their parents to guide them better. Children felt that they should be taken for holidays and exposure trips. Participants wanted the team to give more time in listening to them. A common voice clearly wanted to study in a good English medium hostel. They wanted to be helped with English language or any difficult subject with regular remedial assistance. On the need for higher education and skill building, a majority of participants felt that they need to develop skill-building practices and must be provided with job placements. They felt that the need of the hour is also to provide computer education and life skill education. Participants wanted to be provided with advance specialized courses based on child’s interest. Participants thought that more awareness building programmes for the new youth would serve younger generation well. In continuing with the same thought, they wanted weekly-based meetings with the parents’ as a norm. The infectious energy fast spread to the entire length of the day and the interactions edged towards a resourceful closure with promises towards future endeavors. The feedback from the day was written all over the venue with happy and chirpy faces.

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