Bipolar Blues

BIPOLAR BLUESEXPIRIENCE POETRY

FROM THE WORLD OF MADNESS

Útgefendur: Krummi og Geðveik List

bipolar_digt.indd 11/28/2004, 10:21 PM1

© 2004 Vilmar Pedersen

Hönnun:Vilmar Pedersen

Umbrot:Vilmar Pedersen

Oddur Árni Arnarsson

Aðstoð við umbrot:Hilmar Tómas Guðmundsson

Próförk:Louise Engelsen

Sérstakar þakkir:Sabine Høgh

GRAFISK Produktion

[email protected]

Öll réttindi áskilin.

Bók þessa má eigi afrita með neinum hætti, svo sem ljósmyndun, prentun, hljóðritun eða á neinn annan

sambærilegan hátt, að hluta eða í heild, án skriflegs leyfis útgefanda.

bipolar_digt.indd 11/28/2004, 10:21 PM2-3

- til Louise


7

Debut

My Life is full of secrets I want to explainI want my thoughts to become words

For them to remain

I have stripped myself nude And my soul has become mute

So this will become my first debut

My first book might become my worst bookBut I want to show you how much I mean

I put the meaning in between

Within a thin red line I will let it rhymeBecause to rhyme is not a crime

It makes a sublime poem really divine.


8 9

Time and Space

I try to look through the darkAs I reach out to get a hold on my life

I search for a glimpse of lightBut I float on the surface of my conscience

And sink deeper as I wanderBetween time and space.

Black January Blues

The yearly January blues came over And revisited me

Overwhelmingly it sucked my soulInto a black hole and swallowed

The inside was black As on the outside

Where the voice of Vedder Soothed my soul

With: “Black - Dada da da dadada”

As I sit on “The Stick”Where the voice of Vedder echoes

On the gramophoneWith the memory of my

Early Black Blues of Youth.


10 11

Presence

Future’s leftPast has come

Too much sleptPresent’s won

One too manyDays have gone

Have to tryTo catch just one.

Fading Like the Day

Every day goes by they are sinking like a shipAll the moments go by they are fading into the past

Every year goes by and I am a fool like youAnd the dreams go by and I’m just a another dreamer like you

I’m waiting; I’m waiting for the day to fade awayI’m fading; I’m fading like the day into the past

Every girl goes by; they are just another lover that goes byJust another love that never came true

Every song goes by, and the rhythm of the sound tries to flee awayEvery thought goes by one by one they drift away

I’m waiting; I’m waiting for the day to fade awayI’m fading; I’m fading like the day into the past.


12 13

Birthday

Decision from far beyond Warm feeling inside

Blizzard from all directions Imagination filled with snow

Oh so cold oh not fold

Summer fun winter won ahead a favorite seasonBurnt out conversation nothing but a drag

A birthday coming yes getting olderAfter every single day

Roam through the next to get even olderAnd finally fade.

Emerging Poet

Useless without activitySearching for the awakening

Ignored by the pill

Once a boy With integrity

But slept the dream away

Before an emerging poetNow an ink stain

Before a creative person Now counting matches

And kicked out off the soul

Energy blown awayFrom the empty soul

With the hole

Cold old soul has been sold To the one who wanted to live.


14 15

Falling

Can you hear me I’m callingFor you to try to ease my mind

Can you see me I’m fallingOn the ground that’s bound to what’s behind

Who’s the man who created my hellWhere’s the hammer to break my shell?What’s the reason for keep on fighting

What’s the reason for going through hell?

Can you feel it I’m dying?After all that I have had to go through

Can you save me from dying?From my own personal painful hell.

Silence Pill

Took the pills Went to sleep

Nothing happened

Knows the silence comes Has to be still

Wait until It comes in As a bird

Whispering the peaceInto the veins

As it would come From heaven

Wished it wouldn’tBring you pain

NothingNothing can stop the way

Was born To this world to die And has had enough

Message will come When the time comes

Today will be tomorrowNight will come

When the day breaksWished that it

Wouldn’t bring you sorrow!


16 17

Chemicals

Chemical is the only way for me to be

It lets me feel it lets me seeIt lets me think and sets me free

From you my terror from you my fearThough it lets me fell a tear

From my soul my deepest holeThat is blank and empty without a goal.

Possessed

The world is full of possession Greed and obsession Passion, aggression Man needs a lesson!


18 19

The Flow

Insecure and scaring nerve So much pain to swallow

Head gets spinning and thoughts will float My mind will have to follow

Go go Gotta stop the flow

Gotta let go go Gotta stop the flow

There is this shake when I’m upset When thoughts do float my head explodes

Like an outlet like an earthquake Please seize the fire cause peace is higher

Flow flow I’m floating away

Flow flow floating on a bay

Go go go far away

Go goplease go away.

Words of Wonder

Words flying in the air Like black butterflies of beauty

Try to reach out To grasp just one before the rain

But they separate into characters And now they are drained by the rain

Leaking down like tears Of no hope for tomorrow

Smashed on the window They have to be clear tomorrow

When I throw the rock Through the window of sorrow

I want to ask you to pick up the pieces Of my broken words on the concrete payment

Where all the clear-minded people Are walking on by

Passing on by Will keep on walking on by

Passing by Flying by

Waving me goodbye

Like the words of wonder I will try to grasp until I will die.


20 21

Breakout

When a spoken word needs to be heard I will let it flow for you to know

Spinning round and round The world turns up side down

I hear my inner voice it seeks

I hear my soul it speaks There is an open door

There is always a way out

Full of love and light When in a great big needThere is always a way out

Now I know my inner voice

Sought my soul for a way outInside out a way out

Of the round and round up side down Like the world spinning in a around and round chaos

Now I know when in a need

I have a soul I can seekWhen in a great big need of a way out

Like the confusion of the round and round world chaos

There is always a way out from the confusion chaos Of the round and round world layout

That wants to breakout!

Bipolar Blues

Black coffee and pills I am driving up hills

Hypo manic and stressed For how long will it last

Why won’t you let me be free?Slowly you’re killing me

I’m burning inside Like a plane I collide and crash

Then comes panic and bluesSo depressed and no truce

Dark fear full of painThen you make me insane

Suffering and I screamI wished it were only a dream

I’m screaming inside Like a plane I collide and crash.


22 23

The Long Road

My mind is weakBut my heart is strong

My soul it seeksBut the way is long.

Enter the Light

By the eagle I will enter Led by the sound

Of the rhythm of the wings And the wisdom of the song

By the eagle I will enter Led by the wise

Through the tunnels of the light By the wisdom of the eagles’ flight

Enter the light to the other side.


24 25

Window Mind

Look into the window of your mind

What do you see?

Thoughts running in a marathon Pictures flying like butterflies of beauty

Or simply words flying in a chaos?

Pull down the curtains Sit down, relax and achieve some peace of mind.

Power of Education

Education is the key To the lock of the mind

Full of secretsImages and wordsInside the thoughts

It is the key of knowledgeThat unlocks the mind.


26 27

The Unknown

Worlds of secrets I want to explain

Thoughts become words For them to remain.

Art

An idea pops up in your brainGoes directly into your vain

Flows into energyI try to use my serenity

Flows into the mindBecomes creativity

…And makes this art.


28 29

Love

Love,Welcome into my world

Love,You are my favorite word

Love,You are like a whispering bird

Because of you I am no longer hurt!

The Poetic Mind

To write is a freedomA butterfly with a meaning

Words with wings flying high

Fly, flyMy beautiful butterfly

When fed by the needThe poem flies high in the wind

A flow of the poetic mind

Flow, flowMy needful flying poem.


30 31

God Only Knows

I found a treasure at the end of a rainbowAnd love began falling down like a waterfall

Love fell into my heart and down on my path of fortuneAnd my heart began to beat like drums in the right rhythm

It revealed my smile and the tears of my heart

You filled it up with love and a hope for tomorrowThe hope that no one knows except the universal God

But I know that God only knows how much and deeply - I Love You.

Word Bird

Let it be poetry Use your mind you might find

Peace of art that’s a start

Let it flow in a rowLet it fly in the sky

Let the word be heard

But I’m a bird with a wordOn my tongue singing song

In a tree like a bee

But keep in mind I’m designedAs a bird with a word

So let there be POETRY!


32 33

October sky

Snow fell on my eyeDown from the October sky

In a bright and beautiful nightWith you I long for Christmas

Where light will gather With the bright snow

And fill my heart with hopeFor a new, another year with you.

Wishing Star

My eternal trustful soul mateYou are the true love of my life

You are the better half of me

You put my mind on ease You let my heart sparkle

Of happiness and joy

You are an angel from a wishing star That let all my deepest wishes

And dreams come true

You are the dream Of my life come true And you let my life

be enlightened, shine and shiver.


34 35

A Memory

Slided into the dream dimensionFrom the other side

Felt a smooth emotion in my heartA thought began to shiver

Never felt the whole spine so numbOh, it felt good

A memory to rememberWill be encouraging in the cold

An experience to rememberOh, it felt so good

Oh, I felt you.

Without You

I love you so deep that my heart is on fireAnd I cannot sleep I’m a burning desire

You’re so beautiful that I cannot seeYou’re so wonderful that I cannot be

- Without you.


36 37

Writings on the Wall

You are the path to the wisdom You are my innermost core The sources from the spring

The fountain I adore

You are the need I write forThe key for me to be

As an unlocked mystery For me to be free

I have to preserve your force And by writings I will

By my need you will fulfill My soul and my will

You are the path of my lifeUntil death for you I die I will sacrifice my life

You are the path I adore

The writings on the wall Will avoid me from the fall Before I’m dead and gone

Life has lost and death has won.

The Key of Knowledge

Life is full of momentsI want to enjoy

Life is full of spots I want to explore

Spots in every corner A half opened door

For me it’s like a light Of earth’s creation core

Like a world full of secrets I want to explain

Seeking path of wisdom Of the key that I adore

The key of hidden knowledgeThe key to the door

But there is one thing I knowThat has to be done

Is to seize the day of beautyThat is full of its fruits

It is for us to be fullOf freedom and truth

Given by the unknownForce we cannot see.


38 39

The Sun Poem II

Sunblind

Can you try to stare the sunset up or down

Why does the sun always blind our eyes in the sunset?

Maybe this is a question we have been askingAll our life, all our ages and all our-selves?

I think without a doubt and a thoughtHonestly mentally but not physically

The reason is that The Sunset is our nearest and closest Reflection of our eyes

It blinds us because of our own blindnessTry to stare the sun up or down!

The Sun Poem I

Sunset

Yesterday I saw a sightI had not seen before

In the sunset I saw a lightThat I had not seen before

The sunset was shiningLike gold beyond the earth

My pain in life was windingLike my life beyond my birth

It was like a flash lightIt is hard for me to describe

It might be hard for you to pictureMight be hard for you to figure.


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Bipolar Blues

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