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FROM THE HEADMASTER Richard D. Johnson

FEBRUARY

1 Ice-Cream Bingo

6 Gallery Reception

7 CommonGround

Lecture at Chapin

21 Admission

Open House

15/18 School Closed for

Presidents’ Day

www.ChapinSchool.org

Years ago in my prior school, I knew a senior who seemed to have it all. She was attractive, engaging and funny. Her entire high school academic record was blemished only by a single A-, all the rest were A’s. She was also a gifted musician and a good athlete.

To no one’s surprise, she received acceptances from some of the country’s finest colleges and universities. She headed off to college with high hopes and great promise. Four months later she dropped out of college, discouraged and depressed. Although I suspect that many factors led to her early and precipi-tous melt-down, the most significant was the difficulty she had in facing failure and disappointment. Buoyed by untarnished success in high school, she sim-ply was not mentally prepared to deal with the academic rigors of a first-rate college that did not allow her to get straight A’s. She had not learned how to handle the inevitable disappointments and vicissitudes of life.

Sometimes, because we love our children dearly, we want to do all that we can to shield them from upsetting or disappointing experiences. The problem is, in our understandable desire to protect our children from disappointment and failure, we end up handicapping them in the future. So, it is not a crisis that we need to fix if our child does poorly on a test, or even fails it, nor is it a catastrophe if our child doesn’t get along with a teacher. It is not a crisis if our child doesn’t get the deeply desired lead role in the play or a starting position on the athletic team. Yes, these are disappointments, and we all hate to see our children disappointed, but they are also valuable learning experiences.

As F. Washington Jarvis suggests in his wonderful book With Love and Prayers, “it may well be that the most valuable experiences we have in adoles-cence are not our triumphs or our successes or our popularity, but rather our disappointments and rejections. We grow more through our suffering than through our successes.”

Although it is very difficult to see our children disappointed and upset, our role as parents is to lovingly support them as they learn how to deal with life’s inevitable disappointing moments. In learning how to face them and to deal with them, our children gain the strength and confidence to successfully meet the challenges of life.

February 2013

2 — FEBRUARY 2013 — cHAPIn ScHOOL

Save the Date! February 7 at 7:30 p.m.Chapin Hosts the Upcoming CommonGround LectureFREE RANGE KIDS: Raising Self-Reliant Children Without Going Nuts

chapin is pleased to host Lenore Skenazy who will explain why preventing every possible danger or difficulty in our child’s everyday life is harmful to kids.

Do you ever let your child ride a bike to the library? Walk to school? Why are we so much more pro-tective of our children than our parents were? Lenore Skenazy believes in helmets, car seats, and seat belts, she just doesn’t believe that every time school age kids go outside, they need a security detail. In an engag-ing, informative and humorous lecture, Ms.Skenzay will explain why preventing every possible danger or difficulty in our child’s everyday life is harmful to kids. Her tips on positive parenting provide a common sense approach to parenting in these overprotective times.

Lenore Skenazy is a graduate of Yale University and writes an op-ed column that appears in more than 100 publications. After she let her nine-year-old take the subway by himself and wrote about it, she found herself on The Today Show, Dr. Phil, and even the BBc, defending herself against charges she was “America’s Worst Mom.” She has now written the book, Free Range Kids: Giving our Children the Freedom We Had Without Go-ing Nuts with Worry.

Please feel free to invite others to this lecture and children are invited as well, if you feel the subject matter is appropriate.

For more information you can visit the website at www.princetoncommonground.org. The lectures are always thought-provoking and informative. Please contact Martin Barbour at martin.barbour@mac.com or Dina Brewer at dina_brewer@hotmail.com if you have any questions on commonGround or want to get involved in the organization.

PAREnTS’ ASSOcIATIOn nEWSI scream, you scream – we all scream for Ice-Cream Bingo! Thank you to co-chairs Sasha Berman and

Amy DiMeglio as well as Lisa Tindall and Elizabeth Hall for organizing the volunteers and publicizing the event. Thank you to all the parent and student volunteers; and of course a BIG THAnK YOU to the mainte-nance staff for their help.

We invite you to join us for the PA Reads Book Cub event on Tuesday, February 26 at 7 p.m. at 4383 Province Line Road. Join other chapin parents for a lovely evening and engaging conversation about the book Wonder written by new York Times best selling author R.J. Palacio about empathy and kindness.

Please send in your RSVP cards for the annual chapin Dinner Auction: “Journey Through Time,” at the Green Acres country club in Lawrenceville, nJ on March 9th. Our Auction committee is putting together a dazzling evening!

Planning ahead: There are some PA officers who will be completing their two-year terms at the end of this school year, and event chairs are always in demand. If you’re interested, please get in touch with our PA President Yakenya Moise at ymoise@verizon.net or watch your email for information. We’d love to have your input!

Chapin School Parent BulletinThe chapin School Parent Bulletin is distributed nine times throughout the school year.

Contributors: Bob cotter, Maura coughlin, charlie Fuller, Richard Johnson, carol Kinney, Yakenya Moise, carole MooreCoeditors: Sharon Gomberg, Ada Yung

PAREnT BULLETIn — FEBRUARY 2013 — 3

DinnerAuction

March 9, 2013

RAFFLES | GAMES | DANCING | FOOD | FUNWhen: Saturday, March 9, 2013 at 6 p.m. Where: Greenacres Country Club, Lawrenceville We are very excited about this year’s dinner auction theme “Journey Through Time.” Take a walk through chapin’s history while connecting with parents, faculty and alumni. This is a wonderful opportunity to learn more about chapin’s past, present, and future. Most importantly, there will be fabulous food and entertainment!Past: Invitations should have been received.Present: 1) Send in your RSVP now.

2) Purchase Raffle tickets: 50/50 Winner receives one-half of proceeds collected ($50/ticket) Headmaster for the Morning: $20/ticket; $100 for six Winner’s student is Headmaster for the Morning3) Donate an auction item or share an experience!!

Future: Attend the Dinner Auction on March 9, 2013. Attire: Since this is a fun and “reunion style” event, feel free to wear a splash of red or white! Dress is “anything goes,” so wear your favorite pair of jeans, khakis or cocktail dress.

For more details, visit http://www.chapinschool.org/Dinner-auction under Parents on the school website.

DEVELOPMEnT nEWS Annual Fund Thanks to the generosity of parents and Trustees, and the work of many volunteers, December and early January saw the arrival of a lot of gifts for the Annual Fund! Parent volunteers from each class have reached out with emails, an occasional phone call and even a parking lot conversation or two, encouraging participation in the Annual Fund.

If you are among the many families who have already contributed, thank you! If not, please consider mak-ing a gift. The Annual Fund year continues through June 15!

There are lots of options for giving, including the online version; just visit the school’s web site and click on the Support icon. You may send a check or make a donation of appreciated securities if you’d like. Please contact the Development Office with any questions (bcotter@chapinschool.org or 609-924-9251). Escape the Winter Blues

Sometimes in the middle of winter, in the bitter cold and vexing snow, one might wish to travel to a differ-ent time of year, one with better weather, even some sunshine. Wouldn’t that be nice?

Well, we can’t help you with the sunshine, but we can brighten up your winter—as well as take you on a Journey Through Time of a different sort—at the annual Dinner Auction.

Liven up the month of March with outstanding company, scrumptious food, entertainment and perhaps even a libation. There is absolutely no better way to spend Saturday, March 9, than joining your Chapin friends at the Greenacres Country Club. There will be an exciting special announcement at this event! As the theme of a Journey Through Time surveys the past, present and future, you’ll want to attend to find out more.

THE GALLERY AT CHAPIN | CHAPIN SCHOOL 4101 PRINCETON PIKE PRINCETON, NJ 08540

Ken McIndoe, known for his high energy im-pasto paintings mainly of landscape, is going in a new direction, exploring all the possibilities of the color spectrum in his abstract paintings on shaped wooden cutouts. He is showing what color can really do.

Connie McIndoe is a clay artist who will be exhibiting her latest sculptural wall pieces. Her individual clay wall sculptures are formed by repetitive designs of varying sizes and texture with no two pieces the same, yet forming a unified whole.

Artist Opening Wednesday, February 6, 2013

5 - 7 p.m.

The McIndoes are residents of Hopewell and are both well-known artists and teachers. Connie taught at Queensbor-ough Community College in New York City for 25 years and Georgian Court College in Lakewood for seven and has been teaching from her home studio, Hopewell Pottery, since 1974. She has had numerous solo exhibits and was re-cently in a “Ceramics Invitational” at Ellarslie at the Trenton City Museum and NJ Arts Craft Annual at the New Jersey State Museum. Ken is a professor who has taught at the Art Students League in New York since 1981, where he was once a student. He has also taught landscape workshops in Ireland, South Korea, Alaska, New York and New Jersey. He received fellowships from the New Jersey Council of the Arts in 1987 and 2000. He has shown with a group of artists called “The Street Painters” in New York City and has had numerous solo exhibits in New York and New Jersey. He is represented by The Artful Deposit in Bordentown, NJ.

GALLERY OPEN BY APPOINTMENT DURING SCHOOL HOURS | TELEPHONE: 609-924-7206

http://www.chapinschool.org/The-Gallery-at-Chapin

Connie & Ken McIndoe “Images: Reflections of Adventure”

C E R A M I C S A N D P A I N T I N G S

F E B R U A R Y 6 - F E B R U A R Y 2 8 , 2 0 1 3

Our chapin chargers continue their intense efforts on the hardwood. Dittmar Gym has been the scene of many exciting basketball games this season. At this point, the boys’ J.V. team and the girls’ varsity and J.V teams remain undefeated. The boys’ varsity team is having a tough go of it this season, but have really represented chapin well with their incredible efforts throughout each game. Mr. Fuller is always scouting the school for prospective players. During a Kindergarten class one of the students was doing a great job with his dribbling skills, using both hands and moving well. Mr. Fuller went over to compliment the young man. He thanked Mr. Fuller and explained that he has been practicing since he was zero! He said mom ate a basketball so he could practice...now that is what one would call dedication. There are still a few great seats available for our remaining games. GO CHARGERS!

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Chapin Chargers...the Undefeated

“I’ve been practicing since I was zero...Mom ate a basket-ball so I could practice!” the young man said proudly.

Lower School LOWDOWNon Perseverance... It’s been our focus in the month of January, a month where it is needed, perhaps, more than ever. now that winter break is behind us, it’s cold, and those multiplication tables, for example, loom large. It would be so nice to pull the covers up over our heads, stay warm, and put all of these demands out of mind. And that’s how our young students feel who are trying to master those multiplication facts with their little effort! Imagine the child who is struggling. The desire to give up can be compelling, and that’s the child whose discomfort we all feel. It’s so easy to want to make it easier. However, when I think about perseverance, it is clear that the child who is struggling is the one who is gain-ing the stronger lesson in perseverance. Should we make it easier for the child if we can? Of course. But is it heartbreaking if it is still a struggle? no, not necessarily. This child is learning to leap over hurdles. This child is learning to persevere. This child is displaying grit, and if all the current literature is correct, including Paul Tough’s How Children Succeed, this trait is a better predictor of success than test scores or academic achievement. In a new York Times article “Train a Parent, Spare a Child,” (Jan. 11, 2013), Bruce Feiler quotes Edward Deci, professor of psychology at the University of Rochester, on ways to work with a child, without bribing, to effect change or work through a difficulty. “First, be clear about why what you’re asking them to do is important. Second, be interested in their point of view. If it’s something they hate doing, acknowledge that, tell them you understand it’s not fun, yet the reason they need to do it is as follows. Finally, communicate in a way that’s not controlling. Don’t use words like ‘should,’ ‘must’ and ‘have to.’ All of those things that convey to them you’re a big person trying to push around a little person.” Help your child through the obstacle, whether academic, social or other but don’t try to make that obsta-cle go away (dependent on the severity of the problem, of course) or try to “fix” it for your child. Know that in providing support you are helping to provide the perseverance, the “grit” your child will need to reach full potential.

u Thank you to members of the Trenton Titans Hockey Team who recently shared read aloud time in grades PK – 4. So nice to see athletes sharing a good book with the children, and the children loved it!

u Please look for the letter stating your Spring Conference appointment time in your child’s Lower School January report card. These were mailed on January 25. If you have not yet received your child’s report card, please notify us at once.

PAREnT BULLETIn — FEBRUARY 2013 — 6

UPPER SCHOOL UPDATE: We have an action-packed February!u Please be sure to attend this year’s Upper

School Curriculum Fair on Friday, February 8 from 7 – 8:30 p.m.

u On Thursday, February 14, the Upper School will be treated to a Valentine’s Day’s Brunch dur-ing Advisory. Thank you in advance for helping to make this a special event.

u The Loaves and Fishes Community Ser-vice project will be held on Saturday, February 23. Please be sure to send in your grade level assigned items and sign up to help. The P.A. has a sign-up sheet on Google.docs for making Mac & cheese, cakes, driving to drop off food at the cathedral, helping make PB & J sandwiches or helping to serve at the cathedral. The Eighth grade will be serving breakfast so other volunteers will not be needed until after 10:30 a.m. This is a huge undertaking but won-derful initiative. Thanks for being a part of chapin’s commitment to serving the greater community.

u The Educational Records Bureau tests (ERB) will be administered to students in grades 3 – 4 on Monday thru Thursday March 4 – 7 and to students in grades 5 – 7 on Monday thru Wednes-day March 4 – 6. Please see that your child is well rested and that he or she has eaten a good breakfast each day.

CHARACTER CORNERI’m not concerned with your liking or disliking me…All I ask is that you respect me as a human being. ~Jackie Robinson

Isn’t this what we all wish for? It is fitting that the virtue for February is RESPEcT as we just had an assembly given by Dr. Michael Fowlin on the topics of RESPECT, EMPATHY, and ACCEPTANCE. Words can’t describe the experience that those who attended the assembly had. Dr. Fowlin is a psycholo-gist, actor and poet who spent an hour with students in grades 3-5 and an hour with students in grades 6-8. He didn’t lecture, point fingers or preach to us, but rather he made us all feel, really feel what it’s like to be in another’s shoes. It was a gift to have him come to our school and as a community we are talking, feeling and changing. Our challenge is to keep his mes-sage alive so we continue to respect all human beings no matter how different they may be. Never take a person’s dignity: it is worth everything to them, and nothing to you. ~ Frank Barron

Sixth Grade Students are

Flipping Over Science!Mrs. McQuarrie’s sixth grade class has

been learning science in a brand new way. Instead of sitting through lectures in class,

her students watch custom created presentations at home on their computers or tablets. The presenta-tions, each 10-12 minutes long, are created by Mrs. McQuarrie to take the place of a traditional lecture. Students take notes on the videos and come in the next day ready and eager to share, discuss and learn. Flipping the lecture to a homework assignment allows for more hands-on learning and collaboration in the classroom. Traditional homework assignments are then completed in class where the teacher can actively assist the student. The videos are available for the student to watch as many times as needed. Even if any student is absent, he or she won’t miss anything.

Since the “Flipped” classroom first began as a pilot in September, feedback has been overwhelmingly posi-tive. Students and parents like being able to re-watch the lessons prior to tests, the number of pesky missing homework assignments has been reduced while test scores improved. When the first pilot session ended, students enthusiastically requested that the class con-tinue as a flipped class. Mrs. McQuarrie has more than happily obliged and is working on flipping some of her other classes.