Chapter 17

Aging in Marriage and

Family Relationships

Chapter Outline

• Age and Ageism• Caregiving for the Frail Elderly—The

“Sandwich Generation”• Issues Confronting the Elderly• Successful Aging• Relationships and the Elderly• Grandparenthood• The End of One’s Life

True or False?

• The process of death, rather than death itself, is the primary fear of the elderly.

Answer: True

• The process of death, rather than death itself, is the primary fear of the elderly.

True or False?

• Good physical health is the primary determinant of an elderly person’s reported happiness.

Answer: True

• Good physical health is the primary determinant of an elderly person’s reported happiness.

True or False?

• “Mastery/competence” is the way elderly grandparents describe the experience of taking care of grandchildren.

Answer: False

• Musil and Standing (2005) reported on the diaries of grandmothers who revealed stress in their full time role of grandmother as they coped with their grandchildren’s daily activities.

• Bullock (2005) studied 21 grandfathers over the age of 65 who were involved in the active care of at least one grandchild. “Powerless” was the term used by these grandfathers to describe their experience.

The Concept of Age

• A person’s age may be defined:– Chronologically– Physiologically– Psychologically– Sociologically– Culturally

Age

• This couple is in their 80s, and they have been married for over 60 years (they met on a train); they meet the cultural definition of being old.

• Pg. 481

Ageism

• Every society has some form of ageism—the systematic persecution and degradation of people because they are old.

Question

• When are people considered old?

A. when they begin to collect Medicare

B. all of these choices.

C. when they develop an elderly self-concept

D. when their physical capabilities diminish

Answer: B

• People are considered old when they begin to collect Medicare, when they develop an elderly self-concept and when their physical capabilities diminish.

Question

• The persecution and degradation of people due to their age is called

A. elder abuse.

B. gerontophobia.

C. gerontology.

D. ageism.

Answer: D

• The persecution and degradation of people due to their age is called ageism.

Life Expectancy

YearCaucasoid

Males

African-American

Males

Caucasoid Females

African-American Females

2000 74.9 68.3 80.1 75.2

2005 75.4 69.9 81.1 76.8

2010 76.1 70.9 81.8 77.8

The “Sandwich Generation”

• The number of individuals in the sandwich generation will increase for the following reasons:– Longevity– Chronic disease– Fewer siblings to help– Commitment to parental care– Lack of support for the caregiver

Your Opinion?

• Suppose your father has Alzheimer’s and is in a nursing home.– He is 88 and no longer recognizes you.– He has stopped eating.

• Would you have a feeding tube inserted to keep him alive?

Caring for the Elderly

• Because this woman’s mother and brother were n a nursing home, she felt comfortable moving to one.

• In this photo, the daughter-in-law (who lives out of state) is visiting her.

• Pg. 486

Issues Confronting the Elderly

• For most individuals, the end of life is characterized by reduced income.

• About 94% of elderly Americans, live in a noninstitutionalized setting.

• Good physical health is the most important determinant of an elderly person’s happiness.

Issues Confronting the Elderly

• Elderly persons often have a reduced capacity for:– processing information quickly– cognitive attention to a specific task– retention– motivation to focus on a task

Issues Confronting the Elderly

• A blurred retirement means the individual works part-time before completely retiring.

• Levitra, Cialis, and Viagra are prescription drugs that help a man create and maintain an erection.

Question

• Which of the following is the most important determinant of an elderly person's self-reported happiness?

A. finances

B. health

C. strong family ties

D. adequate housing

Answer: B

• Health is the most important determinant of an elderly person's self-reported happiness.

Factors in Successful Aging

• Not smoking or quitting early.• Developing a positive view of life and life’s

crises.• Avoiding alcohol and substance abuse.• Maintaining healthy weight.• Exercising daily.• Continuing to educate oneself.• Having a happy marriage.

Your Opinion?

• What do you think the position of the government should be in regard to physician-assisted-suicide?

Relationships at Age 85 and Beyond

• Relationship with Spouse – Marriages that survive into late life are

characterized by little conflict, considerable companionship, and mutual supportiveness.

• Relationship with Siblings– Relationships with siblings are primarily emotional

(enjoying time together) rather than functional (the sibling provides money or services).

Relationships at Age 85 and Beyond

• Relationship with One’s Own Children– In regard to relationships of the elderly with

their children, emotional and expressive rewards are high.

– Actual caregiving is rare.

Grandparenthood

• Grandchildren report enormous benefits from having a close relationship with grandparents, including:– development of a sense of family ideals– moral beliefs– work ethic.

• Divorced grandparents have less contact with grandchildren and participate in fewer shared activities with them.

Grandmother

This grandmother delights in her new grandbaby.

• Pg. 500

Grandfather

This grandson benefits form the happiness he sees in and adoration he feels from his granddad.

• Pg. 501

Death of One’s Spouse

• The death of one’s spouse is the most stressful life event individuals experience.

• Most women who live to age 80 have lost their husbands.

• Patterns women use to adjust to this lopsided man-woman ratio include dating younger men, romance without marriage, and “share-a-man” relationships.

Question

• The elderly fear __________ more than __________.

A. loss of a spouse; dying themselves

B. the dying process; death

C. nursing homes; long illness

D. dying in their sleep; dying in a hospital

Answer: B

• The elderly fear the dying process more than death.

Preparing for One’s Own Death

• Thoughts in the last year of life – Most thought about death and saw their life

as one that would soon end. – Most did so without remorse or anxiety.

• Behaviors the last year of life– Aware that they are going to die, most

simplify their life, disengage from relationships, and leave final instructions.