CHOOSE TO DEFUSEConflict Resolution in the Heat of the Battle
CreativeBread.Studio/mml
CHOOSE TO DEFUSEConflict Resolution in the Heat of the Battle
CreativeBread.Studio/mml
4
Conflict Is a REALITY of Life
5
6
“United communities
WINprojects they never should have won.
Divided communities
LOSEProjects they never should have lost.”
- Ben Teague
Addressing ConflictKey question
Face Conflict Head-On
Am I avoiding the inevitable? 1
Use humor
Ask questions
Right timing
Active ListeningKey Question
Listen Intentionally
Am I hearing the other person? 2
Focus
Open
Affirm
Summarize
Identify the Underlying Issue
3
Interpersonal Communication Change “Unemptied Cups” Triggers
5 Causes of ConflictWhat’s really going on?
Key Question
“What the heck was I THINKING?
“Why did I SAY that?”
The Amygdala Hijack
1
An
immediate,overwhelmingemotional response with a later realization that the response was
inappropriately strong given the trigger.
1
14
15
16
17
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The Triune Brain
1
Reptilian Brain = Instinct
Limbic Brain = Emotion
Neocortex = Logic
Amygdala = Alarm System
Lower Brain
THREAT
Amygdala
Amygdala
Neocortex
Fight-Flight
Keeping All Lanes OPEN
1
Identify your triggersPlan aheadBreathCalming Exercises30-Minute Rule6 Second Rule
1
Pick Your BattlesKey Questions4
• Do I NEED to win?• CAN I win?• Is this the right TIME?• Could this result in a long-term LOSS?
Fight if the results will be DISASTROUS.
How do YOU approach conflict?
CompetingAccommodating
AvoidingCompromisingCollaborating
CreativeBread.Studio/mml
25
“You can have
EVERYTHINGin life you wantif you will just help enough
OTHER PEOPLEget what they want.”
- Zig Ziglar
G.V. “Sonny” Montgomery(August 5, 1920 – May 12, 2006)
• U.S. House of Representatives: 1967–1997
• Chairman, Veteran’s Affairs Committee
• Presidential Medal of Freedom, 2005
Conflict helpsDEFINE
all organizations.
Whether it’sPOSITIVEor NEGATIVE
is up to you.
CHOOSE TO DEFUSEConflict Resolution in the Heat of the Battle
CreativeBread.Studio/mml