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09 Xtra Sports: LGBT Pro Football Players

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Xtra Legal: Bankruptcy

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COVER: Alexis Mabille French Designer

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JACKSONVILLE

616: 616 Park St. (904) 358-6969

AJ Bar & Grill: 1024 Atlantic Blvd. (904) 805-9060 ajsbar-jax.com

Boot Rack: 4751 Lenox Blvd. (904) 384-7090 bootrack.com

Bo’s Club: 201 5th Ave. N. (Jax Beach) (904) 246-9874 bo-sclub.com

Club Jax: 1939 Hendricks Ave. (904) 398-7451 clubjax.com

Hamburger Mary’s: 3333-1 Beach Blvd. (904) 551-2048 ham-burgermarys.com/jax

Incahoots: 711 Edison Ave. (904) 353-6316

Park Place: 931 King St. (904) 389-6616

Metro: 859 Willow Branch Ave. (904) 388-7192 metrojax.com

The Norm: 2952 Roosevelt (904) 384-0029

ORLANDO

Parliament House: 410 Orange Blossom Trail (407) 425-7571 parliamenthouse.com

ST. PETERSBURG

Flamingo Resort: 4601 34th St. S (727) 321-5000 flamingofla.com

Sporters Bar: 187 Dr. MLK St. N (9th St.) (727) 821-1920

TAMPA (Ybor)

Bradley’s on 7th: 1510 E 7th Ave (813) 241-2723

Liquid Tampa: 1502 E 7th (813) 248-6104 liquidtampa.com

Xtra Religion: Give or Take?

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Content

Xtra Health: Testosterone Declining Levels

17 REAL Friends vs FAKE Friends

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Jacksonville LGBT Community Awards 2013 Photographs

History In The Making: Gay Marriage

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Last month we discussed when bankruptcy is the best option. In this economy, growing numbers of our G/L/B/T/Q community are faced with foreclosures, collections, garnishments, medical bills, and repossessions of cars. This month, we will discuss different types of bankruptcies. The differences between Chapter 7 and Chapter 13 bankruptcy begins with the Means Test. In order to file under Chapter 7, your family income cannot exceed the Florida median income for families of a similar size. If you qualify for Chapter 7, you can discharge unpaid credit cards, medical bills, certain kinds of loans, mortgages if you cannot afford your mortgage or your home is worth far less than you owe, and other forms of unsecured debt. If your income is too high, you can file for bankruptcy under Chapter 13. Under Chapter 13, your debt will be restructured in order to allow you to pay off a percentage of what you owe over a 3 or 5 year period. In both instances, once the court approves your bankruptcy plan, there is very little creditors can do to force you to pay late fees, fines, or harass you as long as you stay current in your payments to the trustee. Home Foreclosure - Chapter 7 Bankruptcy While filing for Chapter 7 will temporarily halt foreclosure actions, banks can still file for stay of relief, enabling them to foreclose on your home if it is clear that you will not be able to bring your past-due mortgage current and continue your other payments. Once your credit card and unsecured debt is discharged, you may have enough monthly disposal income to make your mortgage payment. If you had fallen behind in you payments, most lenders would probably require you to bring the mortgage current; if you can't do this, they will probably file a foreclosure as soon as your bankruptcy is closed.

Home Foreclosure - Chapter 13 Bankruptcy Under Chapter 13, past-due mortgage payments can be rolled into your repayment plan. However, Chapter 13 repay-ment plans do not allow you to reduce your monthly mort-gage payment. If you want to reduce your monthly mortgage payment you'll need to negotiate a loan modification with your bank. Even so, past-due mortgage payments can be included in your repayment plan so long as you are able to continue making your monthly mortgage payment. Chapter 13 also allows you to discharge a percentage of your unsecured debt (credit card), and that reduction of your total debt load may allow you regain you stability with your

mortgage payment. The above article is general in nature and should not be relied upon for specific legal advice. Every legal situation is different.

Written by: Gordon T. Nicol

Xtra Legal: BankruptcyXtra Legal: Bankruptcy

Here are the details regarding a poll that will be in the next Sport Illustrated magazine regarding gay athletes in pro sports. The figures don't look great, but what's really depressing is reading some of the extremely homophobic comments left on the website. According to ESPN: A majority of people believe there is nothing wrong with openly gay male athletes participating in sports, but nearly 24 percent think an openly gay athlete would hurt their team, according to an NBC/USA Network poll. The mixed results of the survey on American attitudes toward gay athletes appear in the latest issue of Sports Illustrated, which hits newsstands Wednesday. Of the 979 people interviewed, 86 percent agreed it is OK for openly gay men to play sports, but some seemed to back off when asked if that could hurt their team. "It was like, I'm OK with this, but if you press me, I have some doubts," said Doug Schoen, whose firm, Penn, Schoen & Berland Associates, conducted the poll. The views of athletes also seem to be mixed when they are asked about the issue. When Esera Tuaolo came out after his NFL playing career ended, Sterling Sharpe said his former teammate was smart to hide his sexuality. "Had he come out on a Monday, with Wednesday, Thursday and Friday practices, he'd have never gotten to the other team," Sharpe said.

But Reds outfielder Ken Griffey Jr. said he wouldn't have a problem accepting a gay teammate. "Wouldn't bother me at all. If you can play, you can play," he said. In another mixed result from the poll, 79 percent of respondents agreed Americans are more accepting of gays in sports today than they were 20 years ago. But 62 percent agreed the reason there is so little coverage of gays in sports is that America is not ready to accept gay athletes. Penn, Schoen & Berland Associates conducted interviews among the general population from March 18-21. The margin of error plus or minus 3.1 percent.

Written by: Ty Nolan

Xtra Sports: LGBT Pro PlayersXtra Sports: LGBT Pro Players

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I know a couple who declared they were life partners after knowing each other for only one week. For six of the first twelve months they were together, one of them was deployed overseas. It didn't take long for the rose-colored glasses to come off. Less than twelve months after declaring their union, the mounting problems in their relationship seemed almost insurmountable. Suddenly, each thought the person with whom he thought he had so much in common seemed so opposite and different. It was not that either of them had drastically changed in the time since they'd met. But gone was the romantic love that had clouded their judgment during the first days and months of the relationship. After living together for just over a year, they now marvel at all the ways they differ. One is social; the other is reserved and shy. One is a morning person; the other is a night owl. One loves to travel; the other fears planes. One is tidy and organized; the other is scattered and laid back. And the list goes on and on. They find themselves asking, "Why in the world did God allow two people who are so obviously opposite fall in love?" I believe God allows people and situations into our lives that will teach us the lessons needed to make us stronger and more caring. In this case, I believe the intended purpose was to reveal the importance of serving others. A union of two opposites will only work when each person learns to serve the other – by denying self and putting the needs of the other person first. True love calls us to constantly ask how we can be a source of support and blessing to others, how to be distributors of all those blessings shared with us. Our blessings should not be a "dead end" but rather passed along to people around us. Many of us approach life with a "What's in it for me?" or "What's my get?" mentality. We must be intentional about denying our ego. At the beginning of each day ask, “Who

may I serve today? How can I be an instrument to bring joy to someone today?” We cannot bless others with a "take" mentality. Only a giver is able to appreciate the blessings given to them and be readily available to share them with others. A "you first" rather than "me first" perspective is applicable everywhere, from home, to work, to church, to Starbucks. Love is a powerful thing. When we put the needs of our loved ones before our own, amazing things will happen. Here are some "gives" for your loved one: • Give encouragement. 1 Thessalonians 5:11, Galatians 6:2 • Give comfort. 2 Corinthians 1:3-4 • Give loving accountability. Proverbs 27:17 • Give apology. James 5:16-17 Takers believe they've earned and deserve everything they have, but givers appreciate every day above ground. Givers make the conscious effort to learn, bend, and submit their heart and mind so that they can be a giver – a source of blessings to others.

Written by: Dr. Harvey Carr

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Xtra Religion: Give or Take?Xtra Religion: Give or Take?

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Writer David Vandygriff

As a very young boy in Lyon, Alexis discovered fashion while searching through family attics and museums and re-cutting and sewing up antique lace, petticoats and fashion accessories. As an adolescent, his passion for fashion developed and Alexis took his first steps as a designer conceiving costumes for the theatre and parties, and soon clothes for his entourage. In 1997, he received his diploma from the Chambre Syndicale de la Couture Parisienne. Following apprenticeships at Emmanuel Unargo and Nina Ricci, he joined the Dior team under Galliano for nine years. Working with John Galliano and Hedi Slimane, Alexis affirmed his creative personality while developing Dior custom jewelry accessories lines. Thanks to his rich and playful imagination served by a pointed technique, Alexis stayed faithful to the Dior spirit while drawing in new generations of clients. Among others, he was instrumental in creating the successful Massaï, Belle Epoque, Maharadjah and Funky lines. Nowadays, served by serious experiences of an international high profile fashion business, Alexis Mabille draws us into his dynamic, joyful and daring universe of his own line. He remains sophisticated and always inspired by contemporary unisex fashion, which is why he was given creative carte blanche to fuse the impeccable quality and traditional techniques of French classic sportswear brand Pyrenex with his unique, imaginative brand of haute couture; the Pyrenex Premium collection marries an urban sensibility with an altogether more frivolous, whimsical brand of luxury. Sculpted, supple and soft, Mabille’s work with volumetrics has upset all the codes in traditional down jacket design. The almost-weightless, ultra-warm feather filled material has been transformed into biker jackets and pea coats, capes and bombers in exaggerated proportions ranging from mini to maxi. Mabille’s signature "excess luxury" is evident with jewel-coloured fur trims or snowdrifts of tiny rectangular sequins. Described as “a breath of fresh air in the realm of puffy-styles often associated with off-mountain lounging”, Pyrenex Premium is the perfect fusion of performance and luxury. Nothing inspires me like… Life, the craziness of Paris, the frivolity and energy of peo-ple... but fashion's history, too.

I hope… To continue doing my job until the end, as I’m so passionate and have loved it since my childhood.

Cultural influences… French culture and history; I love to know about everything in detail.

I got where I am... Of course, I built everything from my white hands, of course with the support of so many cool people around me.

Fashion can sometimes… Be crazy, but that is why I love it and why life is fun and ac-tive, the chance to realise dreams.

Money makes… Life more easy and soft, but doesn’t change creativity and human energy.

Creativity comes from… Life, energy and dreams mixed with real-life ideas.

If I could… Do whatever I love, it would be stunning. I have never…

Been really sad.

Love is…

Exciting and frilling.

My future is…

Futuristic.

NYC/London/Paris/Milan are…

My life, travelling to promote my brand and collections.

I wouldn't pay for…

Sex.

My mum...

Worked with me from the beginning and is incredible.

My biggest regret...

Is that time passes too quickly.

I wouldn't want... To lose my cat.

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Alexis Mabille: French DesignerAlexis Mabille: French Designer

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If there’s one thing we can all agree on, it’s that friends are awesome. During the good times and the bad, through thick and through thin, your best pals are there for you—and you’re there for them. But sometimes, friends may turn out to be “friends.” You know: Those poisonous relationships that look great on the surface, but leave you feeling all icky underneath. So how do you tell these fake friends from your real friends? We’ve put together a handy guide to help you figure it out. If you’ve got anyone that fits one or more of these profiles, get rid of them, stat! The last thing you need in your life is the sort of negativity that arises from that sort of relationship. Embrace the positive—your real friends will help you do it!

1. A fake friend will expect you to drop everything for her if disaster strikes, but will brush you off if the same thing happens to you. A real friend is there for you just as much as you’re there for her.

2. A real friend makes time for you because she genuinely adores hanging out with you. A fake friend will only make plans with you if her other, “better” plans fall through. (PS: You’re totally better than her other plans!)

3. A real friend will help you look your hottest for a big night out. A fake friend will help you look hot—as long as she thinks she looks hotter.

4. If a fake friend asks you to help her move, she makes you do all the heavy lifting and then refuses to lift a finger when you ask her for the same favor in return. A real friend not only helps you move unasked, but also helps you pick out the best color paint for your walls—and has a painting party with you to get the work done!

5. If you say you need some space, a real friend will give it to

you. A fake friend will either crowd you or start bad-mouthing

you behind your back—or both.

6. If you've got a celeb crush, a real friend will help you meet him or her (even if it's Zac Efron and he looks like this). A fake friend will make fun of you.

7. A real friend will be there for the important moments in your life. A fake friend will try to make those moments all about her.

8. A real friend will encourage you in your dreams, no matter how crazy they sound. A fake friend will tell you, “That sounds great! But ...." and subtly sow seeds of doubt.

9. When you've broken up with a guy, a real friend will volunteer immediately to come over with ice cream, Kleenex and booze. A fake friend will suggest you calm down.

10. A real friend will lend you her expensive bag when you've

got a big event coming up unasked. A fake friend will tell you

where you can buy one like it.

11. A real friend will sit in the dressing while you try on a thousand pairs of jeans and encourage you until you find the

right pair. A fake friend will tell you to shop online.

12. A real friend will not only sit with you through the thousandth time you've watched Dirty Dancing, she'll say the lines along with you. A fake friend will suggest a DIFFERENT MOVIE!

13. If you're going on a blind date and you're nervous, a real friend will be at the bar ahead of time to make sure you're okay. A fake friend will tell you to call and let her know how it went.

14. A real friend will totally not think it's crazy that you want to drive by his house just to see if he's home. A fake friend will call you a stalker.

15. A fake friend loves to hear all about your failures and

disappointments. A real friend gives you a shoulder to cry on,

but then reminds you about all the great things you've done --

and will go on to do.

16. A real friend will volunteer to come over and take care of your kitty while you're on vacation. A fake friend will suggest a cat-sitter.

17. A real friend can laugh now about the fights you've had in the past. A fake friend harbors resentment -- you know what we're talking about.

18. A real friend sends you links to articles she knows you'll love, or that reminds her or fun time you've had together. A fake friend only forwards you those passive-aggressive chain-letter emails!

19. A real friend would rather stab her eyes out than flirt with your boyfriend. A fake friend will laugh, "It's all in good fun!"

20. A fake friend is someone in your heart you know you wouldn't miss if you never saw her again. A real friend? She's the one you hope will grow old with you so you can be crazy little old ladies playing gin rummy and drinking martinis to-gether!

Tell us: Who's your best friend?

REAL Friends vs FAKE FriendsREAL Friends vs FAKE Friends

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Xtra Health: Testosterone Xtra Health: Testosterone Written by: Mamie Joshlin, RN

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"Declining testosterone levels are not an inevitable part of the aging process, as many people think," said study co-author Gary Wittert, MD, professor of medicine at the Uni-versity of Adelaide in Adelaide, Australia. "Testosterone changes are largely explained by smoking behavior and changes in health status, particularly obesity and depres-sion." Many older men have low levels of the sex hormone testosterone, but the cause is not known. Few population-based studies have tracked changes in testosterone levels among the same men over time, as their study did, Wittert said. In this study, supported by the National Health and Medical Research Council of Australia, the authors analyzed testosterone measurements in more than 1,500 men who had measurements taken at two clinic visits five years apart. All blood testosterone samples underwent testing at the same time for each time point, according to Wittert. After the researchers excluded from the analysis any men who had abnormal lab values or who were taking medications or had medical conditions known to affect hormones, they included 1,382 men in the data analysis. Men ranged in age from 35 to 80 years, with an average age of 54. On average, testosterone levels did not decline significantly over five years; rather, they decreased less than 1 percent each year, the authors reported. However, when the investigators analyzed the data by subgroups, they found that certain factors were linked to lower testosterone levels at five years than at the beginning of the study. "Men who had declines in testosterone were more likely to be those who became obese, had stopped smoking or were depressed at either clinic visit," Wittert said. "While stopping smoking may be a cause of a slight decrease in testosterone, the benefit of quitting smoking is huge." Past research has linked depression and low testosterone. This hormone is important for many bodily functions, including maintaining a healthy body composition, fertility and sex drive. "It is critical that doctors understand that declining testosterone levels are not a natural part of aging and that they are most likely due to health-related behaviors or health status itself," he said. Unmarried men in the study had greater testosterone reductions than did married men. Wittert attributed this finding to past research showing that married men tend to be healthier and happier than unmarried men. "Also, regular sexual activity tends to increase testosterone," he explained. The study findings were presented by Andre Araujo, PhD, who was a visiting professor at the University of Adelaide and

I is vice president of epidemiology at New England Research Institutes, Watertown, Mass.

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Written By: Jon Greer

Given the historic nature of the marriage cases before the U.S. Supreme Court this week, the United for Marriage Coalition is hosted a celebration of marriage equality on as the high court heard oral argument in Hollingsworth v. Perry (California's Proposition 8 case). New polling shows a supermajority of Americans now back marriage equality, including a majority of Republicans under age 50. The celebration at the steps of the Court kicked off at 9am with speakers representing a broad cross-section of marriage equality supporters: legendary civil rights leaders, religious and labor champions, Republicans who signed a friend of-the-court brief, and members of the military and National Football League. Everyday families - loving LGBT couples and their families and friends - will explain why marriage matters to them. UFM, a coalition of more than 150 organizations, had also organized 175 similar events in all 50 states to show the nation is ready for marriage equality. “Today we stand on the steps of the Supreme Court and on the threshold of history, as the highest court in the land considers one of the most defining civil rights issues of our time. Our gathering at the Supreme Court, as well as all of the powerful events occurring in every state across the country, reflects the vast diversity of support for marriage equality,” said National Gay and Lesbian Task Force Executive Director Rea Carey. “The array of people and organizations standing up for equality is historic: nearly 300 leading businesses, 30 retired military leaders, 131 top Republicans, 214 sitting members of Congress, and dozens of religious, labor, legal and family health organizations. This is a watershed moment for America.” “Today the children of gay and lesbian parents are standing up for their families outside the Supreme Court,” said Sean Carlson, Family Equality Council spokesperson. “The three million parents in America who are LGBT want to marry for the same reasons as everyone else – to share their hopes and dreams, build a future with the person they love, and find someone to grow old with. Our families and our children are living proof that marriage strengthens all families." “Americans in communities across the country have stepped up and organized around marriage equality in truly momentous ways,” said Heather Cronk, Co-Director of GetEQUAL. “In every single state across the country, everyday folks are organizing publicly and powerfully to show their communities' support for equality." "There's a lot to celebrate given that we've reached the tipping point on marriage equality," said Human Rights Campaign President Chad Griffin. "Families all over this

country from coast to coast, in red states and in blue, believe in basic fairness and the freedom to marry the person you love. The right to marry the person you love has been upheld by the Court 14 times in its history. It's a fundamental part of who we are as Americans." "The movement in support of marriage equality has never been deeper or more diverse," said Brian Silva, Marriage Equality USA Executive Director. "Individuals and groups from labor and business, progressives and Republicans, faith leaders and LGBT activists and so many others have worked tirelessly to create over 150 community events and 150 faith gatherings in all 50 states to show that our country believes the time for the freedom to marry for all Americans is now. We are blown away" "Marriage equality is one of the great civil rights issues of our time, and something our community of organizers cares about deeply,” said Ethan Roeder, Executive Director, New Organizing Institute. “NOI is honored to be part of this coalition that's fighting to ensure that love and commitment is recognized equally in America." The United for Marriage Coalition is a group of LGBT and allied organizations working to elevate the broad support for marriage equality through events in Washington, DC and across the country in advance of the Supreme Court rulings on two marriage cases. Groups leading the United for Marriage efforts include the Family Equality Council, GetE-QUAL, GLAAD, Good As You, the Human Rights Campaign, Marriage Equality USA, the National Gay and Lesbian Task Force, and the New Organizing Institute.

History In The Making: Gay MarriageHistory In The Making: Gay Marriage

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