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Men of IntegrityTABLE OF CONTENTS

Click on the study title you’d like to see:

Study 1: TAKE HIM AT HIS WORD

Study 2: A LOOK AT THINGS

Study 3: CARING COMMITMENT

Study 4: FAITH AT WORK

Study 5: HURRIED SICK

Study 6: THE SENSUALITY SNARE

LEADER’S GUIDE

Take Him at His WordGod and His Word are 100 percent trustworthy!

It’s difficult to find people we can really trust. Few of us know many people we’d trust with our lives. And how many people would we trust with our eternal destinies? Fortunately, God—and what he has revealed to us about himself through his Word—merits our complete trust. He sees the big picture and the end of the story, and he wants us to trust him with every part of our lives.

Men of Integrity Lesson #1

Scripture:Judges 6–7; Psalms 37:16–24; 145:17–21; 25:8–10; 18:30–36

Based on:This study adapted from Men of Integrity devotions for week of Sunday, March 9 (Knowing God: Take Him at His Word)

LEADER’S GUIDETake Him at His Word

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Note to Leader: In preparation for this study, read all of the Scripture passages above. If you have time, reading Judges 1–5 would give you good background for the main passage you’ll be looking at in this study. You may also want to reflect on times God has taught you to trust, and be ready to share such experiences at appropriate places during the study.

Warming UpLeader: Read the following story to your group.

The CatcherHenri Nouwen wrote about The Flying Roudellas, friends of his who were trapeze artists with the circus. They told Henri that there’s a very special relationship between the flyer—the one who lets go—and the catcher—the one who catches. As you might imagine, this relationship is important—especially to the flyer!

As the flyer swings high above the crowd on the trapeze, the moment comes when he must let go. He arcs out into the air, and his job is to remain as still as possible and to wait for the strong hands of the catcher to pluck him from the air.

The flyer told him, “Henri, everyone applauds for me because, when I do those leaps and back flips, they think I’m a hero. But the real hero is the catcher. When I come down from the triple somersault, all I have to do is stretch out my hands and trust, trust that he’ll be there to pull me back up.”

“The flyer must never try to catch the catcher,” he noted. The flyer must wait in absolute trust. The catcher will catch him. But he must wait.

—John Ortberg in PREACHING TODAYAdapted from PREACHING TODAY (1999) by permission.

Discuss:

[Q] How does this story connect with how we should look at God?

[Q] In what ways are we like a flyer in life?

Running the RaceLeader: Give your group as much of the following background information as you feel is helpful.

© 2004 • CHRIST IANIT Y TOD AY INTE RNA TI ONAL

Visit SmallGroups.com and ChristianBibleStudies.com


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Gideon’s StoryGideon was one of the judges God raised up to lead his people at a particular time in history. This time period, covered by the book of Judges, was a dark period in the history of the Hebrew people. It was a time of repeating the same cycle over and over. God would bless the people with prosperity and peace; the people would bask in the prosperity and eventually fall away from God; God would allow hard times to come to the people; the people would repent and cry out to him for help; God would bless them with a leader who would once again bring peace. Then the cycle would start all over again.

In this section of our study, we’re looking at the story of Gideon, most of which is found in Judges 6–7. If we look at the end of the verse just prior to Judges 6 (5:31c), we find where Israel is in the cycle: “Then the land had peace forty years.”

The start of Judges 6 sees Israel declining through the next two steps of the cycle—turning from the Lord and experiencing the hard times of oppression under the hands of their enemies. That’s where we pick up the story of Gideon.

Leader: For this major part of the study, form four groups. If necessary, a group can be only one person. Have each group explore the assigned passage finding answers to the questions listed below.

Group 1—Judges 6:7–32

How would you describe Gideon’s faith in God at the beginning of this passage?

How did Gideon’s trust in God change during the events described in the passage?

How did Gideon demonstrate his trust in God?

What was the result of Gideon’s obedience?


How would you describe Gideon’s faith in God at the beginning of this passage?

Why do you think Gideon decided to test God with the fleece?

Do you think that what Gideon did with the fleece was appropriate? Why or why not?

What do you think Gideon’s fleeces and God’s responses accomplished in Gideon’s life?

Group 3—7:1–8, 12

How did the forces of Israel described in Judges 7:3 compare to the forces of the Midianite coalitian?




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If you’d been Gideon, what would you have been thinking as God thinned down the Israelite troops?

In Judges 7:2, God expressed his purpose in thinning down the troops when he had 32,000 men. What effect do you think this thinning process had on Gideon? On the remaining 300 men?

What effect do you think God’s promise in Judges 7:7 had on Gideon?


What does Judges 7:10–11 tell you about Gideon’s faith status at this point?

What do the Midianite’s dream and its interpretation (Judges 7:13–15) tell us about how God is able to accomplish his purposes?

How did Gideon’s trust level change after his eavesdropping on the Midianites?

What can we learn about trusting God from this story of victory against seemingly insurmountable odds?

Leader: After the groups have completed their studies, have them report their findings. First, have them summarize the passage they studied, and then have them give the answers they found to the questions. Allow others to add any thoughts or comments as well.

Discuss:

[Q] How do the ups and downs of Gideon’s trust in God compare to your own level of trust in God? Can you give examples?

[Q] How should Gideon’s story affect our trust in God?

[Q] Read Psalm 37:16–24. What does it mean that “The Lord upholds the righteous”?

[Q] What thoughts in this passage help you relax and trust God’s provision?

[Q] Read Psalm 145:17–21. What promises do we see in this passage?

[Q] How should those promises affect the way we live?

[Q] What should our response be to God for all he’s done for us?

[Q] Read Psalm 25:8–10. What does God offer us?

[Q] What does God expect of us?




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Reaching the Finish LineLeader: Read the following story to your group.

Stick to the PlanThe late Christian leader Spencer Perkins told about the basketball team he played for that made it to the state championship. The team members weren’t big. None were superstars. But they were in top condition and trusted their coach.

Just before the tournament, they were blown out by 30 points by another team. In the tournament, the team that defeated them was beaten by 30 points by yet another team. They figured that team must be 60 points better than they. Not a chance of winning! But Perkins’s coach kept saying, “We’re the best-conditioned team here. If we stick to our game plan, we’ll win. Trust me.”

At the half, Perkins’s team was down by 10 points. When the fourth quarter began, they were still behind by 10. The coach told them, “Stick to the plan. Speed up the tempo. Don’t panic. Trust me.” They did. With a minute to go, they tied the score. With a few seconds to go, they had the ball. Coach called time out, drew up a play, and sent them back in. It worked! They were state champs!

When we take God at his Word, we’ll do what he says in spite of all obstacles or opposition—and taste victory.

—Dave Egner in Power Up!

Discuss:

[Q] As humans and especially as men, we want to see what’s ahead and execute our own plans for our future, but what does this story suggest we should do?

[Q] Must we understand God’s game plan in order to trust him?

[Q] Read Psalm 18:30–36. Why should we be able to trust God with every part of our lives?

[Q] What part of your life is toughest for you to give to God?

[Q] How can we help each other learn to trust God more fully?

Leader: Wrap up your study with prayer, allowing men to pray as they feel led. Close with your own prayer, thanking God for his trustworthiness.

—Study by Paul Woods, a writer, editor, and pastor near Sturgis, Michigan. He is the father of three children and

has been the husband of one wife for nearly 30 years.



LEADER’S GUIDE

A Look at ThingsReconsidering possessions and money.

If the love of money is the root of all evil, why is the accumulation of money so important to so many people? Money and possessions are enticing. We all like to have shiny new things. We all like to be looked upon as successful. We all like to be able to give nice things to our wives and families. Is there anything inherently wrong with those desires? Only when they come between us and God. If we begin serving money instead of God, we’ve lost perspective. We’ve crashed and burned in our relationship with God. Fortunately he has a better plan for our lives—keeping money in its place as we serve him alone.


Scripture:Matthew 6:24; Matthew 6:25–33; Mark 8:34–37; 1 Timothy 6:6–10; Hebrews 13:5.

Based on:This study adapted from Men of Integrity devotions for week of Sunday, December 8, 2002.

LEADER’S GUIDEA Look at Things

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Note to Leader: In preparation for this study, read all of the Scripture passages above. Also plan to bring a stack of old magazines for use in this study.

Warming UpLeader: Read or summarize the following story if you’re doing this study with a group.

Rejected PrescriptionA doctor slammed the phone down in exasperation and rubbed his eyes. I asked him what was wrong. He recounted to me his financial woes. His huge home in an exclusive part of the city was costing far more than he’d ever planned to spend. His children were costing a small fortune to send away to fine boarding schools. His wife demanded a new, very expensive car. And the fee for membership in the country club had quadrupled.

When I suggested cutting back, he glared at me as if I were a leper and remarked, “The most important thing in my life is my house and my social standing. If I lose those things I might as well die! My life will have no meaning!”

—Bruce Hennigan in God's Man Adapted from Don Aycock, God's Man (Kregel, 1998)

Discuss:

[Q] When have you heard this kind of attitude expressed by someone who wasn’t a Christian? By someone who was a Christian? When have you felt this way?

[Q] Besides our faith, what factors influence our outlook on possessions?

[Q] This story is an extreme example, but how do our desires for things often govern the way we live?

[Q] If we truly let God shape our value systems, how would our lives change in regard to possessions?

Running the RaceLeader: Share the following information with your group.

This study is starting right off with one of the most often-quoted verses of Scripture when it comes to discussions about money. It will give us a basis from




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which to launch into other passages that explore the topic further. That verse is Matthew 6:24.

Discuss:

[Q] What is the key thought that pops out from this verse?

[Q] What does it mean to serve money?

[Q] How does serving money prohibit one from serving God?

The following three passages explore different aspects of the relationship God wants us to have with him and with money or possessions. Exploring the three passages will help give us a broad understanding of what God expects of us in this area.

Leader: If you’re doing this study with a group, form three smaller groups and assign one of the following passages to each group. If you have a small number of participants, a group can be one person. Have groups read their passage discuss the questions. Be sure each group assigns someone to take notes to enable sharing with the larger group later.

Group 1—Matthew 6:25–33

What do these words of Jesus say about our worries regarding money and things?

In what ways do we worry about these things?

What is Jesus getting at through his comparing us to birds, flowers, and grass?

How well do we really know what we need? What is the value in our heavenly Father knowing what we need?

How can the key principle given in Matthew 6:33 change the way we look at money and possessions?

Group 2—Mark 8:34–37

What does it mean for someone to deny himself and take up his cross and follow Jesus?

How can someone save his life through losing it?

What does it mean to lose one’s life for Jesus and for the gospel?

How does the message of Mark 8:36 connect with the verse we looked at earlier, Matthew 6:24?

What is it about possessions that causes them to endanger our very souls?




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Group 3—1 Timothy 6:6–10

What does it mean to truly be content?

What are the temptations fallen into by people who want to get rich? How are people ruined by them?

How is the love of money the root of all evil?

Can someone who focuses on accumulating material possessions ever be content? Explain.

How can one be content with few or no earthly possessions?

Leader: After the groups have completed their studies, have them report their discoveries. First, have them summarize the passage they studied, and then have them give the answers they found to the questions. Allow others to add any thoughts or comments as well. After the groups report, move on to the following questions.

Discuss:

[Q] From the passages we’ve studied, what would you say is God’s view of earthly possessions?

[Q] How can money and possessions pull us away from God?

[Q] James Dobson once said, “The more things you own, the more things own you.” How is that true?

[Q] We can’t live in today’s world without money. How do we achieve the right outlook toward it?

[Q] What is our responsibility to our families in providing the things essential for survival? For comfort? For personal enjoyment?

[Q] How can money serve us instead of our serving it?

[Q] Where does trusting God fit into this picture?

[Q] From all we’ve studied, how should a Christian’s outlook on money and possessions be different from that of our culture?

Reaching the Finish LineLeader: Read or summarize the following story if you’re doing this study with a group.

Go FigureOver the years we’ve had good, mostly reliable, cars. But it’s amazing how old and shabby a perfectly good four-or five-year-old car can look next to a shiny new




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model. And then there was my computer, which was never fast enough, my house never quite big enough, my stereo underpowered, my TV screen too small, my mountain bike too heavy, and my vacations too short.

It never quite occurred to me what all those times I criticized my car might do to a child. Lamenting the car’s inadequacy, drooling over new car ads, communicating my desires to have a different, better, newer car—these were within earshot of attentive ears. It’s not that I wasn’t grateful for what I had: I was. But we lived around people who always seemed to have a little bit more. It was hard not to notice and harder still not to comment occasionally.

Then to my complete astonishment and utter surprise, my children began to be dissatisfied with what they had. Go figure. They started wanting newer, better and more stuff. They had finally learned the lesson I had taught them. My values had been transferred.

—Dan Schaeffer in Why I Wear a Plastic Dinosaur. Adapted from Why I Wear a Plastic Dinosaur. (Christian Publications, 2002).

Discuss:

[Q] How pleased are you with the attitudes your kids are picking up regarding money and things?

[Q] Which ones are they picking up from you?

Reflect:

[Q] What attitudes toward things do you display that you aren’t sure are pleasing to God?

[Q] What things, or desires for things, might be hindering your relationship with God?

[Q] When it comes to money or possessions, what do you need to change in your life to make it more pleasing to God?

Leader: Bring to this study a stack of old magazines that can be torn apart. At this point in the study, make the stack available to your group. Tell men to browse through the magazines and tear out one picture that represents an area they need to work on in regard to possessions. They don’t have to show anyone what they tore out. After men all have their pictures, read aloud Hebrews 13:5. Encourage men to offer up to God the area they need to work on, and to tear up the picture, symbolizing their giving that area of their lives over to God. Pass around a wastebasket to gather the pieces.

Close your session in prayer, allowing volunteers to pray aloud. Ask God to help these men overcome culture’s expectations and to serve God in their lives, not money.




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LEADER’S GUIDE

Caring CommitmentGetting real about your most important human

relationship.

Millions of marriages are hurting in this world. And Christian marriages are not an exception. Many Christian men struggle with how they’re supposed to treat their wives. And many have mistaken perceptions of what it means to be a Christian husband. God has given some very specific instructions for husbands that include some tough-to-meet requirements. God wants us to love our wives in a way that in some ways seems impossible: to love them as much as Christ loved the church.


Scripture:Ephesians 5:21–31; Philippians 2: 5–8; 1 Corinthians 13:4–7

Based on:This study adapted from Men of Integrity devotions for week of Sunday, May 4, 2004.

LEADER’S GUIDECaring Commitment

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Note to Leader: In preparation for this study, read all of the Scripture passages above. Seek to apply them to your own marriage as you think about them. Be prepared to admit your own failings in this area as you help men understand what God expects of them as husbands.

Warming UpLeader: If you’re doing this study with a group, begin by having men share answers to the following question:

[Q] In what ways does a husband show he cares about his wife?

Leader: Once men have discussed the question, read or summarize the following story.

Yo, Adrian!I loved the movie Rocky, especially the first one. Rocky Balboa was a sloppy, muscle-bound meat packer with a thick Philadelphia accent. He drank raw eggs and punched frozen beef. Most people think of it as an underdog movie where a no-name gets his big shot to fight the champion. Not me. I think of it as a love story.

Adrian was Rocky’s girl. She wore thick dark glasses and a stocking cap pulled down over her non-stylish hairdo.

Rocky loved her more than anything, but Adrian couldn’t believe that anyone as wonderful as Rocky could love someone like her. Rocky was great. He didn’t blow her off with a, “Oh, come on Adrian. That’s stupid. You know I only care for you.”

Instead, he held her chin in his hand and drew her eyes to his. With such tenderness and firmness he said, “You ain’t neva gittin’ rid of me.” I love that line, and we men should use it from time to time.

That line would be perfect after an argument, a disagreement, and when things get really tense. It will make it clear to our wives that we’re in it for the long haul and that nothing can make us throw in the towel.

—Todd Wilson in Indiana

Discuss:

[Q] What do you think of Rocky’s line?

[Q] Have you ever expressed a sentiment like that to your wife? Why or why not?




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[Q] What might her response be you did?

Running the RaceLeader: Share with your group as much of the following information as you feel will be helpful.

Ephesians 5:21–31 gives a lot of guidelines for the relationship between a husband and a wife. Unfortunately, we sometimes only see in that passage the submission of wives to husbands, when indeed the instructions to husbands take up a much larger proportion of the passage and involve some very difficult requirements.

This passage is also subject to a lot of debate today. Some suggest that the headship of husbands over wives is a key authority issue. Others say that men and women are essentially equal before God and the headship of the husband is much less authority-based. We’re not going to get into that issue in this study. Instead we’re going to focus on the clearly-laid-out responsibilities of the husband described in this passage. We’re also not going to address the instructions to wives in this passage. What we’re focusing on in this study is how God wants us to live with our wives.

Leader: If you’re doing this study with a group, bring large sheets of newsprint and different colors of markers. If newsprint is unavailable, at least bring sheets of paper. At this point in the study, form groups of three or four men, and give each group a sheet of newsprint and a few markers. Have them draw on their papers a large outline of a man. Then have them read Ephesians 5:21–31. Instruct each group to dig into the passage and write inside their outline at least ten words that describe a husband who is living by the principles of this passage.

Give groups at least ten minutes to work, then have them share with the large group what they wrote. Encourage them to explain anything that may not seem clear. Then move on to the following questions.

Discuss:

[Q] How far off are these descriptions from the typical Christian husband today? Why do you think that is?

[Q] What do you think is the significance of Ephesians 5:21? How can both partners submit to each other?

[Q] What does it look like to love your wife as Christ loved the church? What kind of an attitude does it require?

[Q] Read Philippians 2:5–8. What does this passage add on what it means to love your wife as Christ loved the church?

Some men tend to suggest that they don’t really care about themselves and their own bodies—and some of our bodies show that! However, we don’t tend to forget meals. And we enjoy the feelings that come to our bodies in the bedroom! So to say we don’t care about ourselves or our bodies is really not true.




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[Q] Read Ephesians 5:28–29. Taken with the above statement, what do these verses suggest about how we should treat our wives?

[Q] Looking at the whole passage, Ephesians 5:21–31, describe in your own words how you believe God intends that men treat their wives.

Since we’re all men here, we can admit it: Sometimes it takes a lot to get tough concepts through our thick skulls. So we’re going to look at another passage that elaborates on what true love is.

Leader: Read aloud 1 Corinthians 13:4–7 then have men turn to it in their Bibles.

Discuss:

[Q] From this passage, would you say that love is more a feeling or an action? Explain.

[Q] What’s tough about this kind of love? What’s great about it?

[Q] How does the love described here relate to the love Jesus has for the church?

[Q] What does this passage say about how we’re to treat our wives?

Reaching the Finish LineThis love we’ve been talking about isn’t a short-term thing. The Bible makes it clear that we’re to love our wives for life. Like Rocky, we need to be sure our wives never want to get rid of us!

Leader: Read or summarize the following story if you’re doing this study with a group.

Uncompromising CoachJohn Wooden, whose teams won ten NCAA championships, was the first person inducted into the Hall of Fame as both player and coach.

On the 21st of each month he sits down and writes a love letter to Nellie, his wife of 53 years. Once he’s shared his heart with her, he carefully puts the letter in an envelope and places it with the others in their bedroom, all neatly tied with a yellow ribbon. So far, there are more than 180 love letters. They remain unopened. You see, it’s been 15 years since his beloved Nellie died.

I suspect that the first time Coach Wooden misses writing one of those letters, he’ll be delivering the message to her face-to-face.

—John Maxwell in The Right to Lead (J. Countryman, 2001)




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Discuss:

[Q] What do you suppose it took for Rick Reilly to characterize Coach Wooden as “loyal to one woman”? What night he have observed to write that?

[Q] How could our nature become more like that of John Wooden? How can it become more like that of Jesus?

[Q] James Dobson has said, “Married life is a marathon. You will need the determination to keep plugging. Only then will you make it to the end.” How is it necessary to “keep plugging” in marriage? In what ways?

[Q] How do Dobson’s statement, Wooden’s actions, and Rocky’s statement connect?

[Q] What’s the most important thing that’s hit you from this study?

Reflect:

[Q] What do you need to change in your attitudes or your actions to bring them more into line with what we’ve learned in this study?

Leader: Bring sheets of plain paper or card stock to this session, and distribute them now along with the markers used earlier. Have each person now create a card for his wife. Encourage men to write something that expresses what they’re committing to do to strengthen their caring commitment to their wives. If they resist, encourage them to have fun with it! Their wives will love it!

After men have completed their cards, close your session with prayer. Encourage men to be creative in giving their cards to their wives—maybe take them out to a romantic dinner and give them the card with dessert!





LEADER’S GUIDE

Faith at WorkTaking Jesus with us to the job.

Too many Christians put on their Sunday suits and honor God on Sundays but then go to work on Monday and pretty much hide their faith. For men, living out faith at work is probably the hardest because maintaining a manly image is so important in many workplaces. However, a real man can live out his faith at work, and he can make a difference in the lives of the people he contacts there. God is honored whenever that happens.


Scripture:Matthew 25:14–30; Psalm 15:1–5; 1 Peter 2:11–17; Proverbs 11:3; 1 Corinthians 10:31; Ephesians 6:7

Based on:This study adapted from Men of Integrity devotions for week of Sunday, January 26, 2003 (Flagging Zeal)

LEADER’S GUIDEFaith at Work

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Note to Leader: In preparation for this study, read all of the Scripture passages above. Also, be thinking about experiences you’ve had at work in which you were able to let your faith show, or where you may have failed when you know you should have done something different. Be prepared to share such examples if the right time arises during the study.

Warming UpLeader: Read or summarize the following story if you’re doing this study with a group.

Shining ThroughWhen I took a job as a customer-service rep for Federal Express, the dozen or so new employees in my training group were overwhelmed by all we had to learn just to answer the phones. While we rookies were cramming facts and figures that first day on the job, the veteran employees ignored us. They knew some of us wouldn’t last past training so they didn’t bother to even acknowledge us.

On the second day of training, we made our way to the break room for lunch. Several veterans were on one side of the room, eating and chatting away. Silently all of us trainees grabbed our lunch bags and went to an empty table to eat by ourselves. Suddenly one—and only one—of the veterans separated from his side of the break room and came over to the trainee table.

“Hi,” he said warmly. “My name’s Rick. Thought I’d come over and welcome you all to FedEx.” He spent the rest of his lunch hour with us, offering pointers and telling stories about life on the job. Every day after that, Rick stopped by our table to chat. He even introduced us to some other veterans.

My third day at FedEx, I went home and told my wife, Amy, “I think I met a Christian at work. He hasn’t said so, but he’s the only guy I’ve seen there so far who’s acted like a Christian.”

Sure enough, it wasn’t long before we all knew about Rick’s faith in Christ. It came out naturally in casual conversation, prompting a good discussion about religion.

The thing that made Rick credible to us “newbies” wasn’t so much that he stopped to chat, but that he knew his job cold and did it well. Because we respected his expertise, we also were happy to have his company. He helped us to succeed at our jobs—and presented a model of Christian love at the same time. He managed to keep his mind on his work and his heart on the Lord, and we all benefited from it.

—Mike Nappa in The Courage to Be a Christian




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[Q] How did Rick’s faith impact his actions at work?

[Q] How did Rick’s actions at work impact the people around him?

Running the RaceLeader: Share the following information with your group.

The Bible gives us many guidelines for living Christian lives, and most of them apply to what we do at work. In this part of the study, we’re looking at three passages of Scripture that shed some light on how God would have us take our faith with us into our workplaces. Each one is from a different part of the Bible and gives different insights into what God expects from us. We’re going to explore those passages in groups, and then come back together to share what we’ve discovered.

Leader: If you’re doing this study with a group, form three smaller groups, and assign one of the following passages to each group. If you have a small number of participants, a group can be one person. Have groups read their passage discuss the questions. Be sure each group assigns someone to take notes to enable sharing with the larger group.

Group 1—Matthew 25:14–30

[Q] How is the situation described here similar to our work situations?

[Q] How is the reward system used by the master in this passage similar to the way we’re paid for our work? How is it different?

[Q] How does the master in this passage compare to the people we work for?

[Q] How does the message of this passage apply to the way we function at work?

[Q] Thinking about Rick’s story as well as this passage, how can doing our best at work bring results not only in our paycheck, but for God’s kingdom?

Group 2—Psalm 15:1–5

[Q] What does our “walk” have to do with our work?

[Q] What does this passage say about how we should behave toward our fellow-workers?

[Q] Why is it important to do what we say we’ll do at work?

[Q] Why is it important to be honest at work?

[Q] Thinking about Rick’s story as well as this passage, how can our “walk” at work make a difference in our lives? In the lives of others?

Group 3—1 Peter 2:11–17




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[Q] When applied to the work situation, what does this passage suggest regarding our behavior there?

[Q] When it comes to the work situation, what does it mean to submit to authority? How does that affect our moment-by-moment attitudes, actions and words?

[Q] What does it mean to “live as servants of God” at work?

[Q] How can we “by doing good… silence the ignorant talk of foolish men” at work?

[Q] Thinking about Rick’s story as well as this passage, how can we live such good lives that others may see our good deeds and end up glorifying God?

Leader: After the groups have completed their studies, have them report their discoveries. First, have them summarize the passage they studied, and then have them give the answers they found to the questions. Allow others to add any thoughts or comments as well.

Discuss:

[Q] What are the key principles we’ve discovered from these passages regarding taking our faith to work?

[Q] What makes it difficult to do what we’ve just described?

[Q] From what you can tell in the story, how did Rick handle these difficulties?

[Q] Read Proverbs 11:3. How can integrity guide us at work?

[Q] How can we be destroyed by a lack of integrity at work? How can our witness be destroyed?

[Q] Read 1 Corinthians 10:31. In what ways does this verse apply to what we do at work?

[Q] Describe some ways we can bring glory to God through our work?

Reaching the Finish LineLeader: Read or summarize the following story if you’re doing this study with a group.

Flagging ZealDuring a frustrating Monday morning commute into Washington, D.C., with construction, I observed a traffic flagman actually dancing as he performed his job. Oblivious to the July sun, cacophonous car horns, and angry gestures from impatient commuters, the man swung his orange flags in wide graceful arcs and




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called out friendly greetings to passing motorists. Astounded by the joy this man exhibited in what most would consider a dead-end job, I rolled down my window and asked him how he could be so enthusiastic amid such heat and hostility.

“I’m happy because I’m not working for the man,” he shouted back. “I’m a flagman for Jesus.”

—Jamie Winship in DISCIPLESHIP JOURNAL (1–2/00) Copyright © 2003 by the author or Christianity Today

International/MEN OF INTEGRITY magazine. January/February 2003, Vol. 6, No. 1

Discuss:

[Q] How did the flagman’s focus affect the way he worked?

[Q] Read Ephesians 6:7. What does it mean to serve wholeheartedly?

[Q] If we had the same focus the flagman had, how would it change the way we work?

Leader: Share the following with your group.

In the course of this study, I think we’ve all been challenged to reconsider some of our attitudes and actions at work. Right now, I’d like you to reflect silently on what you feel the Lord might be wanting you to change. Take some time, and zero in on one or two attitudes or actions that you’re willing to covenant with God to change, with his help.

Leader: Bring to this session a man’s lunchbox or a briefcase, whichever would be more common to your group. After men have had some time to think, distribute notecards or slips of paper, and have each man write one or two things he is covenanting with God to change regarding his attitudes or actions at work. Let men know that what they’re writing is between each individual and God. No one else will be reading what people write. As they finish, have men come up and deposit their cards in the open lunchbox or briefcase. After your session, gather the cards and destroy them. If you have facilities available, you might want to burn the cards together as an ending to this session. Wrap up your study with prayer, asking God to help all of you follow through on your commitments and to help you make a difference for him at work.





LEADER’S GUIDE

Hurried SickLearning to slow down and focus on God.

If you ask someone how they’re doing, one of the most likely answers is, “Busy!” Our world is busy. Our families are busy. Our lives are busy. If you look at what the Bible has to say, you’ll find that our busyness may be keeping us from doing what’s most important to God. It’s time to slow down our lives and spend more time focusing on the One who gives us life.


Scripture:Exodus 18:4–27; Mark 6:30–32; Luke 5:15–16; Psalm 23:1–3

Based on:This study adapted from Men of Integrity devotions for week of Sunday, August 24, 2003.

LEADER’S GUIDEHurried Sick

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Note to Leader: In preparation for this study, read all of the Scripture passages listed above. If you have time, consider reading or skimming through Exodus 14–17 to give you more background on what Moses had done with the people of Israel. Examine your own schedule, and be prepared to share with your group the changes that you’re planning to make.

Warming UpLeader: If you’re doing this study with a group, gather the men in a circle. Begin this study with the following activity: Have each man choose something he has with him (in his pockets or wallet) to represent the busyness of his schedule. After a few minutes for thinking and choosing, have each person show his item and explain why he chose it.

Discuss

[Q] What “to-do” items fill our schedules?

[Q] Do our schedules control us, or do we control them? Explain.

[Q] What do you think God thinks of our schedules? How might he want them to be different?


People PlagueFor centuries nobody knew where locusts came from. As Annie Dillard recounts in Pilgrim at Tinker Creek, though locust plagues can blacken a sky for nine hours as they pass—no one understood how or where they originated. The millions of ravenous creatures could denude entire countries. Entomologists would see them laying eggs and label specimens but find none the next year. Years later, they’d mysteriously reappear.

The mystery was solved in 1921 by Uvarov, a Russian naturalist. He determined that locusts are ordinary grasshoppers “gone berserk.” Placed in crowded glass jars, grasshoppers became locusts, a process Dillard describes:

“They literally and physically change from Jekyll to Hyde before our eyes. They will even change, all alone in their jars, if you stimulate them by a rapid succession of artificial touches. Their wings elongate; their color heightens; stripes and dots appear. They are restless, excitable.”

Has there ever been a better description of people, stimulated by the artificial touches of caffeine, Fox TV, fluorescent lights, adrenaline addiction, computers, and telephones? We metamorphose into people plague.




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—Chris Blake in Searching for a God to Love. ©1999 Pacific Press. www.adventistbookcenter.com.

Discuss:

[Q] How does this description of grasshoppers turning into locusts compare to humans with overloaded schedules?

[Q] How do we let our busyness and all the kinds of things mentioned in the last paragraph of this story affect us?

Running the RaceLeader: If you’re doing this study with a group, give people as much of the following background information as you find helpful.

Moses was the leader of the Hebrews, God’s chosen people. He had led them out of slavery in Egypt and had seen God destroy the Egyptian army in the Red Sea. Now they were on their journey to Mount Sinai, where God would give Moses the Ten Commandments. Exodus 12:7 tells us that about 600,000 Hebrew men came out of Egypt, which probably meant that with women and children there were over 2 million people. That’s more people than live in Baltimore, Boston, and Washington, D.C., combined! And Moses was acting as judge for all their disputes! Though the passage doesn’t say so directly, Moses was wearing himself ragged.

Moses had married a daughter of Jethro in Midian during the 40 years he spent in the desert after killing an Egyptian who was beating a Hebrew. When Moses set out to lead God’s people out of Egypt, he had sent his wife and family to be taken care of by his father-in-law. Now Jethro had come and brought Moses’ wife and children with him.

Leader: Have men form trios or foursomes to go over the following passage and questions below.

Read Exodus 18:4–27.

Discuss:

[Q] Why do you suppose that Moses had sent his wife and family to stay with his father-in-law?

[Q] How do you think Moses was able to judge the disputes that arose among over 2 million people?

[Q] What would have happened had Moses tried to continue doing all the same work once his family returned?

[Q] What do you think of the advice Jethro gave to Moses?



http://www.adventistbookcenter.com/


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[Q] How is what Moses was doing similar to what we sometimes do?

[Q] How can you find a way—as Jethro helped Moses to do—to lighten your own load?

Leader: Bring your groups back together into the larger group. Have groups share highlights of their discussions. Then move on to the questions below.

Discuss:

[Q] What often happens to our relationships with our families when we’re overloaded?

[Q] What often happens to our relationships with God?


A church leader was concerned that Vance Havner, a celebrated preacher, was taking two months off in the summer. "Don't you realize that the devil never takes a vacation?" he asked. "True," Dr. Havner replied, "but who wants to be like the devil?"

Like Jesus and His disciples, we must have regular rest, refreshment, and reflection if we hope to maximize our faithfulness and fruitfulness. By taking a break, we follow God's example. He rested after six days of creative labor and instructed us to imitate him. The Sabbath commandment teaches us to rest from our normal routines before we return to the work God has given us.

Discuss:

[Q] Read Mark 6:30–32. What important principles can we learn from Jesus’ example in this passage?

[Q] How often do you get alone with Jesus, as the disciples did?

[Q] Read Luke 5:15–16. What additional insight does this passage give us into what Jesus saw as most important?

[Q] How can doing good things become a bad thing?

Reaching the Finish LineLeader: If you’re doing this study with a group, share the following information with them.

Q. What purposes can a low-key vacation accomplish?

A. Rest. Chronic exhaustion shortens our tempers, undermines our relationships, and increases the likelihood of bad decisions. A vacation can recharge our batteries, providing the rest our bodies and souls crave.




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Gratitude. After each phase of creation, God stopped and observed, "It is good." We can pause during vacation and recall the good things God has done. On my vacations, I write a "thankfulness list" to help me see all of the ways he has been at work.

Reflection. Restful vacations help us to evaluate our priorities and commitments. Jesus frequently withdrew from the crowds to be alone with God and to pray (Mark 1:35, Luke 5:16). We also need to retreat to reflect on where we've been and where we're going.

Relationships. Sometimes we need time away to get an objective perspective on how we're relating to the people closest to us. Then we can return to everyday life with our most important relationships in balance.

Grace. Although salvation comes from God's grace alone, we're often tempted to live by works. We may find it tough to receive God's love on days we don't accomplish anything more than a snooze in the shade. Vacations remind us that our work isn't all that matters.

Refocusing. A break from routines offers a chance to renew—or start—spiritual disciplines we've neglected. My vacations have reignited a desire to journal. Perhaps yours will jumpstart your Bible reading, intercessory prayer, or Scripture memorization.

—Paul Borthwick in DISCIPLESHIP JOURNALPaul Borthwick is a senior consultant with Development Associates International. His mission-related books are listed on his website,

www.borthwicks.org. Adapted from DISCIPLESHIP JOURNAL (1–2/02) by permission.

Discuss:

[Q] How long has it been since you’ve had a real vacation, as described here?

[Q] Read Psalm 23:1–3. How does this describe the vacations God offers? What’s so great about the thoughts in this passage?

We need to take vacations to spend time focusing on God. It’s great to take a week or two, and if you can do that, do it! But sometimes we need to take smaller vacations—a weekend, or even just a day. Remember, God himself rested for a day after six days of creative activity. We humans need at least that much rest and time to focus on God.

Take a minute to think about what you’ll do this week to begin slowing down your schedule, spending more time alone with God, and taking vacations that really help you focus on him. Pray, asking God to help you follow through



http://www.borthwicks.org/


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LEADER’S GUIDE

The Sensuality SnareSexual purity starts with our eyes.

Sex is everywhere in our culture—TV, movies, advertising, the Internet, magazines, and more! It’s really tough to avoid the temptation of lust. Beyond that, morality is at an all-time low. If a man is looking for a willing partner other than his wife, he probably won’t have to look too far. Pornography is an epidemic, even among Christian men—and it isn’t something to be taken lightly just because it doesn’t involve complete infidelity. It can still cause serious damage to a relationship. Sexual temptation abounds and is tough to resist, but our God is there and will help us overcome it.


Scripture:Romans 7:14–25; Job 31:9–12; 1 John 1:5–9; James 1:13–16

Based on:This study adapted from Men of Integrity devotions for week of Sunday, July 7, 2002.

LEADER’S GUIDEThe Sensuality Snare

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Note to Leader: In preparation for this study, read all of the Scripture passages listed above. This study concludes with the suggestion of becoming accountable to each other in the area of sexual purity. As you wrap up this study, you may want to challenge the men in your group to consider making this a regular part of your agenda as you meet together.

Warming UpLeader: Read the following story to your group and ask the questions below.

Snagged!The day the story appeared in Portland’s Oregonian, I was having lunch with a friend. “What did you think of the fire at Adult Fantasy Video?” he asked. “I feel sorry for the guy who died,” he added.

“Yeah, well, I feel sorry for his mother,” I said. “Imagine having that be the last memory of your son.”

“It could have been me,” my buddy told me.

“What do you mean?” I asked, shocked.

“I’ve been in that place. I’ve been in that room,” he said. “You could have been reading about me in the paper today and feeling sorry for my wife and kids.”

“Are you ever going back?” I asked.

“I can’t,” he said. “It burned to the ground.”

But the city slapped the owner’s hand for a fire code violation, and his insurance company gave him a big enough settlement to rebuild.

A few weeks ago I asked my friend if he’d visited the new store. He had. When I asked why, he said he didn’t know. “Every time I leave that place, I feel like the scum of the earth. I swear I’ll never go in there again. But later I just can’t resist the urge. I’m caught and I can’t get loose.”

—Bill Perkins in When Good Men Are Tempted (Zondervan, 1997) by permission.

Discuss:

[Q] Why is it so hard to stop sinning once we’ve initially crossed over that line?

[Q] How does Satan’s knowledge of our weaknesses and our down times equip him to tempt us more effectively?

[Q] Read Romans 7:14―25. Why do we do the very things we hate?




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[Q] How can we avoid being confronted by the lure of sexual temptation?

[Q] Where is the line between being tempted and sinning? How can we avoid crossing that line?

Running the RaceLeader: Read or summarize the following material if you’re doing this study with a group.

Degraded Image

Steve, a Christian friend, confessed to me that he struggled with viewing pornographic images on the Internet. He recalled how one night he was at a site that pictured nude women in various poses, next to inviting screen names and links to contact info (for a fee) for each. The pictures of the two Steve found most inviting were too small on his screen to see much detail.

So he devised a way to save the images and later open them in another program that could enlarge them. But when he tried enlarging, Steve related, “The images were all fuzzy. I could see skin color, but that’s about it. It was ugly to look at.”

“That’s actually appropriate, if you think about it,” I said. “Even if you’d seen the attractive bodies you wanted to, they’d have been distorted pictures of those women as human beings.”

We looked at Job 31:1 together and saw that Job, born with weaknesses just like us, had avoided looking lustfully at a woman. If Job could, we agreed, there is hope for every other guy. Steve realized he needed to change how his eyes viewed the opposite sex. He made a pact with them, and invited ongoing accountability.

—Jeffrey Leever in Colorado

Discuss:

[Q] When we sense ourselves being drawn in by temptation, how can we keep from getting hooked?

[Q] How is the temptation of pornography different from that of temptation by a woman? How is it the same?

Job 31:9―12 focuses on the damage done by sexual sin. This passage can help to remind us of the seriousness of giving in to sexual temptation. Read it now, and then move on to the questions.




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Discuss:

[Q] What damage is done by sexual sin?

[Q] How does it change your perspective when Job says, “may my wife belong to another man”?

[Q] In what way does sexual sin destroy a man, as mentioned in Job 31:12?

[Q] How is the relationship between a man and a wife damaged by sexual sin?

[Q] Read Matthew 5:28. How is the sin of lust over pornography different than physical adultery with a woman? How is it the same?

[Q] When we feel temptation closing in on us, how can we conquer it? Is it sometimes impossible to overcome?

[Q] Read 1 Corinthians 10:13. What hope does this passage give us for overcoming sexual temptation? How can God help us?

Reaching the Finish LineWe have all failed to resist temptation and have fallen, but there’s still hope. We can set up guidelines for ourselves and keep each other accountable.

Leader: You may want to print out the following guidelines for each member of your group.

We’re Equally Messed UpTo help us maintain purity, our group can follow these guidelines and commitments:

1. My goal is to become like Jesus Christ, to keep my promises to God and my wife, and to be sexually pure.

2. I’ll never discuss our specific struggles with anyone outside the group (unless it involves a crime or physical danger).

3. I’ll never lie to a group member.

4. I’ll always assume that each group member wants to hide his sin as much as I do. So I’m giving the other men permission to ask me specific questions that can’t be evaded about my behavior. They expect the same from me.

5. I’ll identify the rituals that precede acting out and share them so the group can check up on how I’m doing.

—Bill Perkins in When Good Men Are Tempted (Zondervan, 1997) by permission.




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Leader: The following questions are for quiet reflection and prayer only. Don’t ask anyone to answer them aloud or to write answers down. Allow several minutes for men to think and reflect. Encourage them to take advantage of this time to search their own lives and to begin to build a wall that will stop temptation before it gets too close.

Reflect:

[Q] What sexual sins do you need to seek forgiveness for?

[Q] What damage have you done to your life and your relationships that you need God’s help to repair?

[Q] What are you going to do to avoid giving in to sexual temptation when you face it again?

[Q] How can 1 Corinthians 10:13 be a help to you in overcoming temptation?

Leader: After several minutes for personal reflection and prayer, have your men get in groups of three or four to pray together as you end this study. Encourage your men to support one another in this difficult battle against sexual temptation.



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