Screenplay

EXT. STREET. NIGHT

HARRY is a skinny, nervous looking young man. He is awkward

and not particularly fashionable. He is walking down the

road, moving in and out of the shadows cast by the

streetlights. He looks decidedly nervous. He stops and

pauses. For a moment he looks as if he will turn around, but

stops mid turn and clenches his fists as if girding himself

up for something. He sets his jaw then takes three more

steps before stopping, shaking his head quickly and turning

around. As he hurriedly walks away his phone rings stopping

him dead in his tracks. He riffles through his pockets and

then picks up the phone pressing it to his ear.

HARRY

(Surprised and nervous)

Hello?

The screen splits in two to reveal CAMERON, a handsome young

man with floppy hair. CAM is sitting on a large sofa, bathed

in the orange and red glow of the lights in Miles’ bar. He

looks a little cross as he speaks to Harry.

CAM

(Cross)

Whoa there! Where do you think

you’re going?

HARRY

(Surprised)

What? I’m just...Er.

CAM

Turn that skinny arse back around

and get yourself here now.

HARRY

I don’t know you know, I mean. I

think I’ll just...

The call waiting sound interrupts Harry.

HARRY

Sorry Cam, I’ve got another call

coming in. Give me a sec...

The screen splits a third time to reveal MATT, a lantern

jawed young man with a swagger of confidence. He is sitting

on the other side of the couch from Cameron. He has a

natural air of confidence.

(CONTINUED)

CONTINUED: 2.

MATT

You heard him Harry, get yourself

here now.

Harry looks from side to side as if really talking to them

face to face.

HARRY

Please guys, I really don’t. Just

tell CAM I’m sorry.

MATT

Sorry? (To Cam) He says he’s sorry.

CAM

Gimme the phone.

Will passes the phone to Cam across the division in the

shot.

CAM

Don’t give me that. We’ve spent a

lot of time and effort arranging

this. Plus, I’ve got a bit of a

surprise lined up. For both of

you..

MATT

(Frowning)

What surprise?

CAM

(Smiling evilly)

You’ll see...Anyway, no more

arguing. Get yourself here...

MATT AND CAM TOGETHER

NOW!!!

As they say now, the central split disappears to reveal

Harry sitting between them.

HARRY

Okay, Okay, no need to shout.

Cameron passes the phone back to Matt who puts it into his

shirt pocket.

HARRY

Look boys I’m not sure I’m this

desperate. There must be better

ways to find a girlfriend.

(CONTINUED)

CONTINUED: 3.

CAM

This is just a friendly gathering

of friends. If you like a girl,

that’s perfect. If not, there’s no

harm leaving empty handed.

WILL

Anyway, you need a girlfriend ASAP

or you’ll end up with a hand like a

claw.

He holds up his hand in the shape of a clawed first.

HARRY

I could be at home right now with a

tub of Ben & Jerry’s. They’re

showing the notebook on Film 4 as

well.

Matt’s phone rings mid dialogue.

MATT

Hello?

He covers the phone then talks quickly to the boys while

standing.

MATT

I just need to take this. (To Harry

- pointing at the phone) Perfect

match for you this one. (To Cam)

I’m sure you’ll like her too. Drink

anyone?

HARRY

(Shaking his head)

No. No thanks.

CAM

I’m good for now. You might want to

get yourself one though.You might

need it.

MATT frowns questioningly at Cam then shakes his head

talking directly into the phone while leaving down the

stairs.

MATT

Hi sorry ... Yeah...Yeah okay...

We’ll meet you upstairs... Yeah ...

Yeah, we’re at Miles’. I’ll get you

a drink. What do you ... (trails

off).

(CONTINUED)

CONTINUED: 4.

Harry rubs his legs nervously.

HARRY

I’m really nervous Cam. I mean what

if she thinks I’m nerdy or

something like that?

CAM

Of course she’ll think you’re

nerdy. You’re the biggest nerd I

know.

Cam looks over the rail and down the stairs and smiles then

leans in confidentially to talk to Harry.

CAM

Anyway, here she comes.

Harry looks nervously around then back at Cam.

CAM

Let the games begin.

A moment later NICOLE arrives at the top of the stairs. She

is wearing a tight top, short skirt, high heels and rather

too much makeup. She has a glass in her hand which she

clasps with her fingertips because of her long red nails.

CAM

Hi Nicole, how are you?

NICOLE

He Cam, I’m great thanks. How are

you?

CAM

Good. Really good.

Harry stands up politely and waits for Nicole to sit until

sitting himself. Nicole smiles at this. She is flirtatious

throughout their brief conversation, Harry is nervous.

NICOLE

Mmmmm, such a gentleman! So, you

must be Harry.

HARRY

Err. Yes. And you must be Nicole?

NICOLE

That’s right. Don’t be nervous. I

won’t bite.

(CONTINUED)

CONTINUED: 5.

HARRY

Oh. Good. Thank you. So. Err. Would

you like a drink?

Nicole grins and lifts her drink to her lips.

HARRY

Oh sorry. Errrr.

NICOLE

Maybe you’re the one that needs the

drink. Loosen you up a little.

As Will returns he is shocked and appalled to see Nicole.

She is similarly annoyed at his presence. Harry is bemused

and worried, while Cam is clearly finding the experience

very funny.

WILL

What’s she doin’ here?

NICOLE

I could ask you the same thing.

WILL

(To Cam)

Did you invite her?

CAM

Ohhhh yes.

WILL

There’s no way you can date her

Harry.

NICOLE

(Angry)

Why not Will? Harry looks like

nice. You wouldn’t try to kiss my

sister while you were seeing me

would you Harry?

Harry looks like he is about to answer, shaking his head

already, but he is cut off by Will.

WILL

To Harry) Don’t answer her. (To

Cam) And you can stop grinning. I

can’t believe you did this. You

know she broke my heart.

(CONTINUED)

CONTINUED: 6.

CAM

(Grinning)

Plenty more fish in the sea you

said.

WILL

NOT THIS FISH!

Nicole rises angrily to her feet.

NICOLE

That’s it, I’m not listening to any

more of this. You were the worst

boyfriend I ever had.

She crosses past him as she speaks her last lines and

practically spits them into his face before storming off

down the stairs. Will calls his line after her.

WILL

Best you mean. You’ll never get

over me. (Then to Cam) You’re in

big trouble.

HARRY

This is like some sort of disaster

movie. I’m getting out of here.

He starts to stand but Cam pulls him down as Will pushes him

down.

WILL

No. No. No. You sit right there.

The nights young. Anyway Cam’s had

his fun, it’s time for a real date.

She’ll be up any minute now.

He moves to look over the stairs then quickly returns to sit

back down by the other boys.

WILL

Here she comes.

He tugs at Harry’s clothes.

WILL

Come on son, smarten yourself up.

This could be the one you know.

In walks KATY, she has long dark hair, a dress, colourful

tights and heavy boots. She looks happy to see everyone

until she sees Cam, who glares at her. It is Will’s turn to

grin.

(CONTINUED)

CONTINUED: 7.

KATY

Oh my god Will. I can’t believe you

invited me and you knew he was

going to be here.

She makes to leave but will gets up and ushers her to her

seat.

WILL

No. no. Come on. You’re here to

meet Harry. Cam’s got nothing to do

with it.

KATY

(Smiling weakly)

Okay, so. Harry is it?

He nods a little sheepishly. She tries to maintain eye

contact with him, but keeps finding her gaze diverted to Cam

who is glaring at her. As she sits down she puts her large

bag and phone down the table along with a few other items of

female necessity.

KATY

Nice to meet you.

HARRY

Likewise. You look very nice.

KATY

Thank you. That’s nice of you to

say. I do try to always look nice.

CAM

Look I’ve had enough of this. You

can’t do this Harry. I dumped this

one for a reason. She’s way too

clingy.

KATY

Too clingy. You mean I wasn’t

comfortable with you seeing me when

you were seeing other people.

CAM

I told you I wanted to explore

other people.

KATY

The other person was a guy. What

does that tell you?

(CONTINUED)

CONTINUED: 8.

CAM

Well, you kissed a girl, and you

liked it.

Katy stands and gathers her bag and phone and other items

from the table.

KATY

Well it was lovely to meet you

Harry. Not so sure about your

choice of friends.

With that parting shot she leaves. Cam and Will begin to

argue heatedly over Harry’s shoulders. Mid argument he walks

out and goes downstairs. The boys seem oblivious to the fact

he has left.

CAM

What the hell was that about? You

know what a hard time I had with

her and you bring her here just to

spite me?

WILL

That’s rich. You invited the worst

girl I’ve ever been out with. She

broke my heart.

CAM

(Smiling)

She broke your XBox, and all your

CDs as well if I remember. Didn’t

she put your phone down the toilet

as well.

WILL

Exactly. What did you invite her

for? She’s a grade A psycho.

CAM

At least she’s not a lesbian.

WILL

Neither was Katy till you got

involved.

AD LIB

9.

EXT. BUS STOP. NIGHT

Harry sits down on the bench beside a bus stop and hugs his

coat around himself. He looks to his left to discover JULIA.

She is a timid looking girl with a heavy duffel coat and

glasses. Harry looks to her and smiles and nods. She does

the same in return.

HARRY

Cold night.

JULIA

Yeah.

They nod and smile and pause for a while.

JULIA

I got dragged out by some

girlfriends trying to set me up on

a date.

HARRY

Ha, really? Me too... Boyfriends

though.

Again there is a long pause.

JULIA

I’d been hoping to stay in for a

foursome with three men I love.

Harry is shocked by this?

HARRY

You were what?

JULIA

(nodding to herself)

Ben, Jerry and Ryan Gosling.

Harry, grins and looks at his watch.

HARRY

I love The Notebook. If we’re quick

we can catch it on plus one.

JULIA

The bus isn’t due for twenty

minutes.

HARRY

If we walk fast we can make it to

mine in 15.

(CONTINUED)

CONTINUED: 10.

JULIA

(smiling and nodding)

Okay.

HARRY

(smiling back)

OKAY

They both stand and take each others hands and start to walk

away into the distance.

FADE TO BLACK: