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December 3, 2012 • Est d . 1892 • Vol. 121 • No.4• Published Monthly • www.ihstattler.com • Ithaca High School, 1401 N. Cayuga St., Ithaca, NY, 14850 • FREE Judy Cogan, art teacher at IHS, with her motorcycle on a trip with her husband. PHOTO/\CHRIS DEVENPECK Janet Bowman Praised for Hard Work And Student Commit- ment Janet Bowman, IHS French teacher, was honored with one of two TC3 CollegeNow facul- ty awards on August 17 at the annual professional develop- ment event. ICSD is one of 45 districts which participates in this event, and Bowman was nominated by students and colleagues for her fast grading, challenging course work, and the number of hours spent af- ter school assisting students. -MV Judy Cogan Honored Award From Cayuga Radio Group, Receives Computer for IHS Twelve area educators received an award at the 22nd annual Apple for the Teachers Award Banquet on Tuesday, November 13, hosted by the Cayuga Radio Group. ey in- cluded Judy Cogan, an art teacher at IHS, who received a brand new laptop and a new computer for the school. Each fall, the seven Cayuga Radio Group stations, including Lite Rock 97.3, NewsTalk and Classic Rock I-100, deliver apples to public school teachers with- in Tompkins County in order to commence the annual Apple for Teachers Award nomina- tion process. Listeners to the stations submit their teacher nominations, which are then, in turn, reviewed by a panel of judges from the seven radio stations. e entire process spans six weeks, and two award recipients are chosen every week and announced on the air from late October until early November. e other eleven recipients are as follows: Pete Aagaard (Homer Jr. High School), Dara Anissi (Lehman Alternative Community School), John D’Antonio (Groton Elementary School), Bryan Ford (Dryden High School), Diane Hallett (Northeast Elementary School), Mary Helen Hoag (OCM BOCES), Steve Kirsch (Boynton Middle School), Marian Luce (Appleby Elementary School), Julie Lundeen (Smith Elementary School), Crista Stark (Barry Elementary School), and Ben Wells (Cortland Jr./Sr. High School). -MV
Transcript
Page 1: December 3, 2012 • Est . 1892 • Vol. 121 • No.4• Published ... · Ithaca High School half page (10 x 8) Mathnasium jor in. There are 4,168 colleges in the United States, including

December 3, 2012 • Estd. 1892 • Vol. 121 • No.4• Published Monthly • www.ihstattler.com • Ithaca High School, 1401 N. Cayuga St., Ithaca, NY, 14850 • FREE

Judy Cogan, art teacher at IHS, with her motorcycle on a trip with her husband.

PHO

TO/\CH

RIS DEVEN

PECK

Janet Bowman Praised for

Hard Work And Student Commit-

ment Janet Bowman, IHS French

teacher, was honored with one of two TC3 CollegeNow facul-ty awards on August 17 at the annual professional develop-ment event. ICSD is one of 45 districts which participates in this event, and Bowman was nominated by students and colleagues for her fast grading, challenging course work, and the number of hours spent af-ter school assisting students.

-MV

Judy Cogan Honored Award From Cayuga Radio Group, Receives Computer for IHS

Twelve area educators received an award at the 22nd annual Apple for the Teachers Award Banquet on Tuesday, November 13, hosted by the Cayuga Radio Group. They in-cluded Judy Cogan, an art teacher at IHS, who received a brand new laptop and a new computer for the school. Each fall, the seven Cayuga Radio Group stations, including Lite Rock 97.3, NewsTalk and Classic Rock I-100, deliver apples to public school teachers with-in Tompkins County in order to commence the annual Apple for Teachers Award nomina-tion process. Listeners to the stations submit their teacher nominations, which are then, in turn, reviewed by a panel of judges from the seven radio stations. The entire process spans six weeks, and two award recipients are chosen every week and announced on the air from late October until early November.

The other eleven recipients are as follows: Pete Aagaard (Homer Jr. High School), Dara Anissi (Lehman Alternative Community School), John D’Antonio (Groton Elementary School), Bryan Ford (Dryden High School), Diane Hallett (Northeast Elementary School), Mary Helen Hoag (OCM BOCES), Steve Kirsch (Boynton Middle School), Marian Luce (Appleby Elementary School), Julie Lundeen (Smith Elementary School), Crista Stark (Barry Elementary School), and Ben Wells (Cortland Jr./Sr. High School).

-MV

Page 2: December 3, 2012 • Est . 1892 • Vol. 121 • No.4• Published ... · Ithaca High School half page (10 x 8) Mathnasium jor in. There are 4,168 colleges in the United States, including

Editor-in-ChiefMedeea Popescu ‘13

[email protected]

News EditorMansi Vohra ‘13

[email protected]

Features EditorJensen Lo ‘[email protected]

Opinion EditorMike Hall ‘[email protected]

Arts & Entertainment Editor Siena Shickel ‘13

[email protected]

Sports EditorRubin Danberg-Biggs ‘14

[email protected]

Penultimate andBack Page Editor

Rex Lei ‘[email protected]

Copy EditorAryeh Zax ‘[email protected]

Photography EditorsMaya Patt ‘13

Nico Cancalosi-Dean ‘[email protected]

Layout EditorAnna Fu ‘13

[email protected]

Fundraiser ChairEmily Scarpulla ‘14

[email protected]

Business ManagerAleksa Basara ‘[email protected]

Advertising ManagerTracy Lai ‘[email protected]

Distribution ManagerJoasia Sendek ‘13

[email protected]

Faculty AdvisorDeborah Lynn

[email protected]

2012-2013

The Tattler is the student-run newspaper of Ithaca High School. The Tattler was founded in 1892,

and is published monthly.

As an open forum, The Tattler invites submissions of opinion pieces and letters to the editor from all members of the community. Drop off submissions in H134, e-mail

them to [email protected].

Letters can be mailed to The IHS Tattler

1401 N. Cayuga St.Ithaca, NY 14850

We reserve the right to edit all

submissions.

These submissions do not necessarily reflect the views of The

Tattler editorial staff.

New AP Killins Here to Stay This school year, APs have come and gone with each turn of the season. Turn-

over rates were becoming so high that interims were replacing interims. But on November 14, Tokinma Killins from Brooklyn, NY stepped up to the plate and secured the position as permanent AP for last names A-L. Killins, who moved back into the area, saw the available position, came up, shadowed other IHS administra-tors for two weeks. She liked the diversity that Ithaca offered enough to take on the role.

Before this, Killins played a dual role in Brooklyn’s KIPP AMP Academy: she served both as a student worker and dean of students. She noted that even though she’s been an administrator for only two years, she’s always been in student support, which, she finds, is a key component of AP work.

“I understand that it’s the combination of the partnerships between the parent and the home and the school and the community that makes the child successful,” Killins said.

In addition, Killins hopes to bring a whole new level of support to the IHS com-munity: consistency. Killins mentioned that her son, who’s in the eighth grade, is in the school that he’s in only because it’s in the district where he’s grown up.

“I come from a place where consistency is important, and just as a student, just remembering my own path and journey through schools, consistency is extremely important.”

Killins noted how impressed she was with the number of programs available for students here. In Brooklyn, she explained that her school didn’t have a student gov-ernment, and she took it upon herself to create a student advisory council, which is akin to a National Honor Society.

As AP, Killins hopes to bring more ideas and programs to the table, as well as to ensure that IHS maintains that positive, warm attitude that’s attracted students and families to the area for decades.

-MV

2 December 3, 2012

The Tattler Literary Issue

2013 We want to publish your cre-

ative writing! Submit your poems, stories, creative pieces, photo-

graphs, artwork, etc. to [email protected]

Non-electronic submissions can be dropped off in a box in the main office. All submissions must

have a name and contact infor-mation.

The deadline for all submis-sions is December 20.

Page 3: December 3, 2012 • Est . 1892 • Vol. 121 • No.4• Published ... · Ithaca High School half page (10 x 8) Mathnasium jor in. There are 4,168 colleges in the United States, including

3 December 3, 2012

Opinion:

Dear Editor,

As a child and adolescent psychiatrist I know that strong, new, and often confusing emotions are at the core of adolescence. Feelings of love, power, insecurity, peer acceptance, self-esteem, idealism, competition and rebellion are good examples. All of this is part of leaving childhood dependence behind and facing the reality of a new sense of autonomy.

The increase of stress in our culture has come at a great cost - overwhelmed parents raising overwhelmed kids. Parental support can fluxuate between wanting to shield their children from emotional challenges to overlooking the challenges as “just a part of being an adolescent”. The adolescent responds by either rebelling or feeling abandoned. The key that is miss-ing for these adolescents is coping and self-regulation skills. If adolescents have the tools they need to face the everyday challenges that stimulate an emotional reaction, they face reality with a true sense of autonomy and self confidence. Instead of becoming confused by their emotions and running away from them, acting out or shutting down, they can have a better understanding of what they are feeling and why. There are a number of research-supported methods that an adolescent can practice to sooth their nervous system and calm their minds, but they can’t do this if they do not know what those methods are.

With the right tools under their belt, adolescents can manage any number of emotional and mental states with confidence. From anxiety and depression, to concentration problems and bullying, I have seen a number of adolescents develop emotion-al resilience that will continue to serve them for the rest of their lives. Developing this resilience through healthy practices that support emotional and social development is the cornerstone of a healthy community and society at large.

For instance, the holidays are coming up and with the holidays comes elevated stress levels for everyone. Parents and teachers may seem to be a bit on edge and students are eager to get out of school and enjoy the upcoming break. You might feel a little more anxious than usual and unable to focus. Here are three things you can do to help you regulate your emotions during the holiday season:

1. Get your body moving. Physical activity produces endorphins which lessens the effects ofstress and increases a sense wellbeing2. Take a breather. A simple meditation where you just follow your breath will provide a lot ofrelief, especially when practiced on a regular basis. Sit with your eyes closed and just listen tothe inhale and exhale of your breath.3. Step back and look at the bigger picture. Involvement with a community group suchas your church or a volunteer organization gives us an opportunity to forget about our ownproblems and lend a hand to others in need. This allows our problems to be put into perspectivein light of the problems of others. Check out Loaves and Fishes or Love Knows No Bounds, twogreat organizations that are dedicated to helping those in need.

With Regards,

Dr. Will Wittlin

Dr. Wittlin is a child and adolescent psychiatrist in Ithaca and Skaneateles. He has written columns for the Skaneateles Press and Skaneateles Journal.

Letter to the editor:

i hate CoLLege appsBy MAYA PATT

During this time of year, seniors can expect to be constantly asked about the college application pro-cess. It’s normal to be interrogated by near-strangers, like your dis-tant relatives or your dentist-- what

schools are you looking at? What do you think you want to study? Teach-ers and parents alike will try to show their understanding of how much stress we are put under in this time of decision-making, but it makes you wonder why we are expected to make so many big decisions with so

much at stake in such a short amount of time.

The application process is not as simple as it sounds. It’s made much easier if a student has a school in mind already, but it becomes a much harder task when you’re not sure where you want to go or what to ma-

continued on p. 3

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4 December 3, 2012

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jor in. There are 4,168 colleges in the United States, including two-year colleges and those that are for-profit. Schools can seem very similar when browsing websites or even after tour-ing the campuses-- all green lawns, smiling frisbee-tossing students, and plush library lounges. With so many schools to choose from, it can almost seem impossible to know where you’ll be happiest at or even get in to. It isn’t just a question of what you want to study-- the student body, location, dorms, campus, and cuisine are all factors that can de-cide whether the college is the right choice. Recent evolutions of the col-lege process, early decision and early action, aren’t much help. It’s hard to give yourself up to one school at the

risk of not getting in or being grant-ed enough aid, and it’s also hard to rely on a fallback school that you may not want to go to at all.

After or before choosing what school to apply to, students have to decide which tests to take. It is not just a matter of SAT vs. ACT. SAT Subject Tests are also generally re-quired, and signing up for tests can start in freshman year. In addition, many colleges will require addi-tional supplements to the formal application which includes SAT or ACT scores, a transcript, one or sev-eral supplemental essays, and a lot of background information. Some really sadistic schools (ahem, Yale) require two full-length additional essays as well as five short-answer.

Although the Common App site is fairly easy to understand, the Col-lege Board site, which you use to send SAT scores, is far from user-friendly.

This decision is one of the biggest we have had to make in our lives. It will decide where we will live, what we will eat, who we will see, and what we will study every day for the next four years or more. While making such a big decision, study-ing for tests, applying, visiting more schools, and weighing chances of get-ting in, we have to continue keeping our GPA’s up and maintain a healthy social life. Whether you’re regretting not working harder in junior year or freaking out about acceptance rates, it is a stressful time for all of us.

I HATE COLLEGE APPS continued from p. 3

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5 December 3, 2012

Ithaca’s YMCA, located on 50 Graham Rd. near the mall, has and continues to be a popular destination for IHS students.

By MEDEEA POPESCU

The YMCA is more than a fitness club. As Frank Townsend, new CEO of the Ithaca branch, put it, “Presently, the Y is offering everything possible.” In addition to a cardio room, a dance studio, a wellness center, a full-sized gymnasium, two pools, racquetball courts, and a weight-lifting room, the Y also hosts community functions and runs a swim team. As well as being a place to work out, the YMCA is also the area’s largest organization offering employment to teens by hiring life-guards, swim teachers, and childcare helpers and offering a variety of vol-unteer opportunities.

However, under Townsend, big changes are underway for the organi-zation. He envisions building a third warm water pool for infants, seniors, and the handicapped, and developing a part of the Y’s 110-acre local hold-ings to create an outdoor wilderness adventure zone. Additionally, the or-ganization is working to increase the number of youth members. Early steps included offering free year-round membership to all first graders and

starting the popular new Teen Glow Dances. A collaboration with IHS to create a student-driven program and a youth volleyball league is also in the works.

In order to fund its scholarship program, the YMCA relies in large part on community partners and indi-viduals for raising money through its Invest in Youth campaign. Townsend especially encourages teenagers to contribute to the campaign, as 100% of donations go back to the commu-nity in the form of the Open Doors scholarship program.

“I’m open to creativity,” Townsend said. “So if someone wants to sell cookies or someone wants to have a dance or someone wants to stand on a table for a longer period of time than anybody else and get donations for it, we’re up for it. And they can be as-sured that all of their money goes to the Y.”

Donations don’t necessarily have to be monetary, either – the Y accepts donations of winter clothes through its Share the Warmth campaign and non-perishable foods for its food drive, all part of the social responsibility aspect

of the organization’s mission. In 1844, when the YMCA – the

Young Men’s Christian Association – was founded on the streets of in-dustrialized London, the organization as we know it was almost completely unrecognizable. It was a Bible study group primarily for homeless and dis-advantaged young men. Throughout its 150-year history its core values have not changed. It began as a place for teenagers to find a sense of com-munity and have the opportunity to participate in athletic activities – the Y is recognized as the originator of bas-ketball and volleyball, and started one of the first swim programs in the U.S. – and today, its mission is the same.

“The voice of the YMCA now is youth development, healthy living, so-cial responsibility,” noted Townsend. “Our mission at the YMCA is simple: we [give] scholarships [to] individuals who otherwise couldn’t afford to be-come a member or participate in our programs. That’s what makes us differ-ent. There’s health clubs, and you can pay ten dollars to go to Planet [Fit-ness],” Townsend remarks, “but there’s only one Y.”

YMCA SeekS CollAborAtion with ihS, More ChAngeS to CoMe

PHO

TO/\PRO

VIDED

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� December 3, 2012

English teacher Jean Amodeo enlightens her AP Lit students in a class discussion.

By SARAH NIXON

Although the weather was cold and rainy on Saturday, October 27, participants of the first annual Strong Women Impacting Society (SWIS) 5K Run/Walk for Cancer were extremely excited to participate. The run was held in the Plantations at Cornell University to raise money for cancer research.

SWIS is a club open to all Ithaca High School students. The club, which now focuses on feminist issues and ideas, was originally formed six years ago to help educate and protect women in Africa against female genital mutilation. The club frequently has guest speakers from the community and holds other events throughout the year. These include surveying students at IHS about body image and hosting a walk in April called Take Back the Night. Emily Schwan, the club advisor, said the club has “enthusiastic and effective members and a strong group dynamic.” Although all of the current members are girls, the club is open to everyone, and freshman and sophomores are especially encouraged to join. Tamar Law, the club president, stressed that SWIS has given underclassmen more opportunities to help organize events this year.

Members of SWIS wanted the 5K to be non-competitive. For that reason, they did not time the race or give out prizes to the first few who crossed the finish line. Ms. Schwan said the club wanted the race “to be open to all.”

The club was expecting around 150 participants, but un-fortunately, due to inclement weather there were only about 50. IHS students and faculty members made up the major-ity of the participants, but other members of the community participated as well.

Law considers the event a success nonetheless. “For a first time event on a drizzly Sunday morning, I think we did pret-ty well,” she said.

All profit will be going to two organizations: the Ithaca Cancer Resource Center and the American Cancer Society for research on female cancers. The club members will be deciding how much goes to each organization after they de-termine how much money they have raised.

Participants decided to run or walk for different reasons. Dave Miller ’13 was the first IHS student to cross the fin-

ish line and the second runner overall. “My aunt has breast cancer and I thought this would be a

good way to show support,” he said.Another participant, IHS student activities’ director Karl

Mellander, said that he wanted to help SWIS, and, “[the event] was a perfect balance between supporting SWIS and running again.”

The club hopes to turn the 5K into an annual tradition. With luck, future races will have better weather and in-creased participation.

FirSt SwiS 5k SuCCeSSFul

By DAVID STEIN

As seen recently in the majority of core classes at IHS, there has been an increase in benchmark tests given. This increase is a result of the new teacher evaluation system that’s been mandated by New York State. The new system requires that in addition to classroom observa-tions, teacher effectiveness will be based on student test scores. Evalu-ation based on test scores compare students’ their scores to the scores they received on similar tests in previous years. The state is moving toward a “value-added model.” The new “value-added data” will con-sider other factors that impact student achievement.

Despite controversy concerning the effectiveness of value-added data, it now counts for 40 percent of teacher evaluations. Studies have shown that value-added modeling (VAM) is not a precise science. In fact, the margin of error for VAM has been known to be as high as 35 percent. Teachers whose students do poorly on tests may not be considered for raises and might even be fired. That being said, many teachers are concerned that they will be penalized for data that does not accurately portray student growth.

Alternatively, supporters of VAM argue that testing data has the potential to isolate the effects of teachers on students. By comparing test data to that of other students from similar demographics, VAM can separate factors like family background from teacher effective-ness. It can also identify disparities between teachers. By identifying which teachers are most effective, links between teaching styles and student success can be made. This would allow educators to identify exactly how students learn best.

Although not everyone agrees on the use of VAM, many educa-tors believe that new methods must be employed to hold teachers ac-countable for their students’ success. There are several alternatives to VAM: these range from peer review to principal evaluation. One like-ly option is student review. Recently there has been a great interest in surveys that help students grade their teachers. Unlike administrators, students get an extended period of time in which to form opinions and evaluate their teachers. Studies have shown that student evalua-tions accurately predict which classes earn the highest test scores.

behind the new teACher evAluAtion SYSteM

PHO

TO/\M

AYA PATT

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� December 3, 2012

By POOJA VERMA With the school year getting into full

swing, the Ithaca High School Code Red Robotics team’s presence in the Ithaca community has been strong at several community venues throughout the fall. Code Red members have been active do-ing volunteer work, community service projects, and demonstrations for the com-munity.

Their largest volunteer project was at Taughannock Falls State Park, where more than 50 Code Red members spent an Oc-tober afternoon trimming branches and removing leaves from the creek bed. The team also cleared an area that the park hopes to use for a wedding gazebo. The team made a huge appearance at Purity Ice Cream’s Carrotmob event in September. Over 20 members clad in red t-shirts came with last year’s robot, setting up banners and the robot’s drive sta-tion. Several families with children clutch-ing ice cream cones approached the dem-onstration site, where Code Red members were ready to talk to the parents and children about what Code Red does. Both adults and children alike were invited to drive the robot, as were the Car-rotmob band and mascot.

But Code Red members aren’t finished yet. On November 10, they par-ticipated in the Family Reading Partner-ship’s Kids Book Fest at Boynton Middle School. The team brought along the past year’s robot, Dr. Swoosh, to go along with the theme - Counting on Books. In addi-tion, Code Red members are currently working on a project that will become an exhibit at the Sciencenter within the next month. The project is creating a Virtual Reality Sandbox, which uses the Xbox Ki-nect to track changes in sand levels, help-

ing teach topography.Why does a robotics team of high

school students do all of these activities? Nothing about clearing trails has to do with robotics, so why do Code Red mem-bers spend hundreds of hours devoted to community service and demonstration events? It’s all in the message of For Inspi-ration and Recognition of Science of Tech-nology (FIRST), the global organization Code Red is a part of and which stands for exactly what Code Red tries to promote. Demonstration events are held specifically to reach out to young students, to show them about our world of innovation in sci-

ence and technology. Community service is about giving back to the community that has supported the team for many years.

Code Red mentors several Lego League teams at area elementary schools, and of-fers programs for elementary and middle school students to introduce to science and technology. Code Red has been instru-mental in starting teams in the Ithaca City School District, most recently at Northeast Elementary. The team also mentors teams at Beverly J. Martin Elementary, Fall Creek Elementary, Belle Sherman Elementary, Enfield, Caroline, South Hill Elementary, and Boynton Middle School.

“The gracious professionalism, engi-

neering ethos, and close-knit camaraderie are really what define this program, and it has the potential to shape one’s character and attitude both in the academic as well as in the personal arena,” said David Lim ’12, who was active in Code Red while at IHS.

However, Code Red members are ul-timately robot-nerds at heart, and the Ra-Cha-Cha Ruckus event in Rochester was one they could not pass up. Ruckus is a mini-competition where teams from around the region are invited to use their previous year’s robot in a rehash of the last year’s game; in this case, Rebound Rumble.

Ruckus is a way for new members (rookies) to get a chance to drive the robot in a competition setting and see what a competition at this scale can be like. “It gets the job done in getting rookies accustomed to robotics,” said Joon Park ’13, a senior in his fourth year on the team.

All of this consti-tutes the team’s off-sea-son. The build season begins in two months, starting at the annual kick-off where FIRST announces the game challenge for which the team must make a ro-bot to complete. Teams then have six weeks of

grueling work to create the robot. Code Red members work for four hours after every school day, as well as eight hours on Saturdays for each of the six weeks. The build season starts with design and strat-egy brainstorming, then transitions into manufacturing and assembling the final robot.

Code Red prides itself in being almost entirely student-run.

“We make all of the parts of our robot in the district’s machine shop,” said Rishi Verma ’15, this year’s head of machining team. “I think it’s amazing that we can build an entire competition-ready robot from scratch just in a technology class-

Code red robotiCS MAkeS A MArk thiS FAll

PHO

TO/\AN

DREA KU

RZWELL

continued on p. 8

Members of the Code Red Robotics Team proudly march.

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8 December 3, 2012

PHO

TO/ED

DITTEN

HO

EFER

By REX LEI

“This quiz doesn’t count for a grade. It’s okay if you don’t know all the answers, just do your best.”

These were the words of every teacher for every class, as they handed their students their baseline assessments in late September and early October.

Due to recent changes re-garding public education, the Ithaca City School District has been mandated by the state to in-stitute baseline assessments at the start of the school year.

“The purpose is to measure student growth,” said Adam Pi-asecki, President of the Ithaca Teachers Association (ITA).

By having students take a test at the beginning and end of the school year, the state has a quantitative way to measure and compare student improvement. From this data, schools hope to gain insight into the effectiveness of teachers, classes, and education as a whole.

The 2012-13 school year is the first to implement standard-ized baseline assessments. Prior to this change, teachers did similar as-sessments, but without much regulation. In addition, previous evalua-tions did not take student growth and achievement into account. The lack of standardized results made it difficult to compare student growth between different teachers.

“Now there needs to be more consistency and an approval from the superintendent on what is being used for the baseline data,” Piasecki said.

In fact, the changes to the teacher evaluations as a whole started about two years ago. After the state proposed their new plans, teach-ers, principals, and upper administration have been working to make

a transition from the old to the new system. Over the summer, work was done to prepare the school’s staff for the implementation of the new teacher evaluation system this year.

“A lot of time, energy, and money [have] been spent on trainings and implementation of the new requirements,” Piasecki said.

The baseline assessments have two main roles. First, they play a part in teacher evaluations that determine the effectiveness of a teacher.

Second, they inform teachers of their students’ abilities in differ-ent areas of the course, so that the teacher can adjust their course content to provide more efficient education. For a student, this means that teachers can use the assessments to adapt the course and focus on the concepts that students don’t know well, as op-posed to spending excessive time on something that students already know.

Despite the theoretical advantages of baseline assess-ments, there have been some complaints from teachers. The new system has placed very specific requirements on assess-ments, causing some disagree-ment.

“The frustration most have felt is not the test itself but the state’s idea of what the test should or should not be,” said Lana Craig, Span-ish teacher at IHS. “It’s understandable that the public wants high ac-countability with regard to student achievement. However, in the state’s attempt to respond to public opinion, it has created a cumbersome and somewhat punitive system to measure that accountability.”

As the addition of baseline assessments and other changes to teacher evaluations stem from New York State, it is unlikely that the measures will be revoked. It appears that administration, teachers, and students must learn to accept baseline assessments for the coming years.

bASeline ASSeSSMentS MeAnt For Student growth, but rAiSe ControverSY

room.”However, the students are not alone.

The team has over 20 mentors; experts in their respective fields who give their time to help move the process along. But as op-posed to doing the work for the students, mentors encourage forward-thinking and problem solving. “We can’t do it without mentors. Their experience and encourage-ment are essential in the process of design-

ing a completely new and innovative robot each year,” said Verma.

Code Red Robotics is an IHS student organization that is also an affiliate of the Ithaca Public Education Initiative (IPEI). IPEI is a not-for-profit organization that believes the education of every ICSD stu-dent is enhanced through community connections and support facilitated by IPEI for students and teachers through en-

gagement, collaboration, gifts, and grants. For further information on Lego

League, FIRST, and Code Red Robotics, please email

[email protected].

**Pooja Verma, a senior at IHS, is the Student Public Relations Officer for Code Red Robotics. She can be contacted at: [email protected].

CODE RED ROBOTICS MAKES A MARK THIS FALL continued from p. 7

Ithaca Teachers’ Association President Adam Piasecki and Superintendent Luvelle

Brown discuss new educational policies within ICSD.

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9 December 3, 2012

Board of Education members prepare for one of their monthly voting meetings on Nov. 27. From left

to right: Dr. Brown (superintendent), Judy Maxwell (member), Rob Ainslie (President), Seth Peacock (Vice

President), and Jay True (member).

boArd diSCuSSeS new rootS, SpeCiAl eduCAtionBy ARYEH ZAX

The Ithaca City School District (ICSD) Board of Education (BoE) held its bimonth-ly meetings on November 13 and 27.

The Ithaca Urban Renewal Agency re-cently put forward a recommendation that the downtown space used by the former Masonic Temple be renovated for public use. The non-profit group that owns the State Theater would take on the project, which would cost about $1.3 million over-all. Various community benefits include in-creased space for the State Theater’s not-for-profit works and a cafeteria and auditorium space for the New Roots Charter School.

In a recent an-nouncement, New Roots announced that, “based on the analysis of evidence from [their] May 2011 evaluation visit, New Roots is on trajectory [to meet] its qualitative benchmarks.” Unfor-tunately, New Roots is falling short of its absolute, quantitative benchmarks. For ex-ample, New Roots has, in general, failed to meet its goal of having at least 75 percent of its students achieving 65 percent or higher on state Regents exams.

“Let the data do the talking - according to this data, New Roots is meeting neither of its vital benchmarks for the year,” said a representative to the board.

Academic achievement at New Roots is an important issue which needs to be dis-cussed and resolved soon.

Four Ithaca teachers - Steve Kirsch, Dara Anissi, Judy Cogan, and Diane Hallett - were recognized at Apple for the Teachers Award Banquet on November 13.

Adam Piasecki, president of the Ithaca Teachers Association, brought up a concern about start times at elementary schools be-coming earlier, having gradually moved from 7:55 to 7:20 am - a change which, in addition to altering morning schedules for teachers, can be hard to accommodate

when weather or other factors are not on the teachers’ side.

Report cards were sent home to IHS students in mid-late November for the first quarter, which ended on November 9. School sports have transitioned from the Fall to Winter season, and the winter sea-son’s kickoff was held on November 14 in Kulp Auditorium.

The first cycle at Lehman Alternative Community School (LACS) ended on No-vember 9.

“Teachers have been hard at work writ-ing student evaluations,” said LACS repre-sentative Bernard Anderson. “[They’re] a way to send out a small form to say, ‘This

is all the things that your student has done this past cycle.’”

In addition, students will be participat-ing in school clubs during the school day next cycle, ranging from extracurriculars to homework help. LACS’s annual pasta dinner will be held in the IHS Cafeteria on December 5.

The Facilities Committee has been dis-cussing the state of the pool and gym, both of which could use renovation - for example, the gym’s floor was warped due to a broken pipe, though the pipe has been fixed and the basketball court is okay for in-season play.

Superintendent Luvelle Brown ad-dressed the BoE’s virtual presence, especial-ly its Dropbox, which contains important public files discussed at meetings. Initially announced as coming out for the Novem-

ber 27 meeting, he was right on schedule; the ICSD website now contains a link to the Dropbox, which anyone can peruse. Brown also mentioned the board’s website, Face-book, Twitter feed, and YouTube account.

IHS has recently welcomed two new APs. Tokinma Killins started on Novem-ber 14 after shadowing other APs for a few weeks, and Martha Hardesty is scheduled to start as an AP in early December.

The Dignity for All Students Act teacher training took place on November 9, to help teachers better deal with bullying among students.

The Continuous Improvement Plan for Special Educa- tion was a major topic

at the first meeting. Teaching styles often reinforce the idea that some students don’t have to involve them-selves in the class-room - teachers often teach in the center and front of the classroom, and well-intentioned teachers who refrain from calling on stu-dents with special needs end up sending the message that those students don’t have to participate, which isn’t the intention. Last year, a ten-point plan

was developed to help improve district-wide special education.

“When we go into classrooms, we’re still dealing...with [the perception of low achiev-ers and high achievers],” said Lee Ginenthal, who spoke to the board on the topic. “As long as this belief system continues, [teach-ers] might have the tools in the kit, but they’re using them deferentially.”

“There are some significant cultural shifts that need to occur [in order to elimi-nate the achievement gap],” said Brown.

In addition, the board a series of its poli-cies which deal with the BoE’s self-evalua-tion, evaluation of the superintendent, and the district’s equal opportunity and nondis-crimination policy. The board did a second reading with minor revisions at its Novem-ber 27 meeting and passed the series.

writeemail [email protected]

PHO

TO/\M

AYA PATT

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A Blast from the Past: Are Teachers Overshadowed by Administrators?

Although the title below may seem positive, don’t be deceived; a closer look into the contents of this 1981 news piece of The Tattler indicates that IHS teachers weren’t satisfied by any means when it came to both ICSD and high school administrations in the eighties. The questions that educators here might be asking themselves after read-ing this is if their relationship with the administration has improved -- if the programs and opportunities they’ve voiced at the table have been put into action -- or if everything has really just gotten worse.

-Mansi Vohra News Editor

Teachers generally satisfied (December 1981)By ANNE LOEHR AND DAVID MARTIN

Do teachers like their jobs? What do they think of the students? How do they feel about the relationship between themselves and the administration? The Tattler polled roughly 25 percent of the faculty, 25 teachers, 12 of whom responded.

Has teaching turned out to be what you expected? In general the teachers answered that they felt that teach-ing has been very rewarding for them. Some interesting responses: “I’ll lecture and 30 heads nod vertically in a mime of understanding... and in essence I have said 30 different things.” The few teachers who did not find teaching here rewarding felt that way because of all the trivial paperwork required of them and lack of apprecia-tion from the students and administration. As for the negative aspects of the job, the administration received all the blame, while the students received none. What they felt was lacking was “professional encouragement” and backing. The administration would say they wanted new, “ideal” programs, but in the end never supported the programs or the teachers who had worked on them. Also, the pressures of public criticism on an increas-ingly difficult job was an added discouragement for the teachers.

How do the students of today compare to the students of the past decade? The general response was that stu-dents today have poorer study skills and a shorter attention span than earlier students. Along with these ideas there were optimistic viewpoints such as, “I’ve seen a complete return in the swing of the pendulum. Today the atmosphere, interests, activities, are more closely parallel with those of the mid-sixties. There was a real break-down in the early and mid-seventies.”

What is the relationship between the teachers and the administration? This question received quite a variety of answers, but most of them tended to center on a negative view of the present relationship. One general feel-ing was that teachers participate minimally, at best, in making major decisions which affect them. Cooperation between teachers and the administration has been difficult. Because of this the teachers feel powerless. All who responded said that there was definitely room for improvement. But here, again, there were some doubts such as, “I would hope there would be room for improvement, but the administration cuts out supplies for Xerox and then blacktops the area where they put pebbles that got kicked around... what is the future?!” Of all the teachers who responded to the survey, the only one who had anything positive to say about the teacher-administration relationship felt that John Caren [then incumbent principal] has brought “stability” and “openness” to the high school.

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Page 12: December 3, 2012 • Est . 1892 • Vol. 121 • No.4• Published ... · Ithaca High School half page (10 x 8) Mathnasium jor in. There are 4,168 colleges in the United States, including

12 December 3, 2012

BY SARA SKROVAN

If you’re interested in marine biology, learning about and caring for different spe-cies of fish, and just having a good time in general, Aquarium Club might just be the place for you! I sat down with club president Julia Wang ’14 to find out more about this cool club and what kind of opportunities a member of Aquarium Club can have.

Sarah Skrovan: When and where are Aquarium Club meetings?

Julia Wang: Aquarium Club meets Friday mornings at around eight, in Mr. Johnson’s room, downstairs H [room H104].

SS: What do you do at a typical club meet-ing?

JW: At a typical meeting, we generally monitor the health of the fish tanks, clean and maintain the tanks, purchase and take care of fish, do some bookkeeping for our fundraising, and of course, we hang around and chat a bit.

SS: Speaking of fundraising, I’m sure we’ve all noticed the candy boxes that Aquarium Club has been selling around school recent-ly. What do the profits benefit?

JW: We use the candy boxes to finance tank upkeep and new fish purchases, as well as a trip for next year. We don’t know for sure where we are going, but at this point it looks like Cape Cod is our most likely candidate.

SS: What is a success that Aquarium Club has had?

JW: Last year another club wanted to do a “goldfish game”, [where a goldfish in a plas-tic

bag is given out as a prize for the winner to take home] and we were able to prevent this from happening and thus the animal cruelty inherent in it.

All those interested in joining Aquarium Club can talk to Julia or any club member for

more information, or just stop by at one of the meetings that take place every Friday morning in H104. Go fish!

Club FeAture: AquAriuM Club

By CONNOR COUTTS

Walking into her room is almost unbelievable: pink walls, a large col-lection of dream catchers strewn along the walls, a refrigerator, two tables stacked with food, a hot water jug, computers, more food, and to top it off, a pantry full of food. No, this is not some kind of lunch room. It’s the IHS testing room and its keeper is Chris Bell. For those who have never been to the testing room, it’s pretty surprising. A tiny room tucked away in the Sci-ence section of E wing, filled with snacks and staffed by a laid-back smiling woman at a desk with long red hair, flip flops, a sweatshirt, and sweatpants. I sat down with her to try and get to know Bell and her awesome character better.

Connor Coutts: Usually children don’t grow up wanting to be testing room supervisors. What did you initially want to do?Chris Bell: Besides doing this? Initially, be a veterinarian.

CC: Where were you educated?CB: Somewhere down South in my elementary school days, and Dryden.

CC: Did you like being a teen?CB: Yes and no, because I had to grow up too fast.

CC: Describe your job at IHS in one word.CB: Exciting.

CC: For some who come into the testing room, it may be surprising. You have just about everything in here that may be found in an apartment and the decor is very loud- why do you like to keep it that way?CB: Because I like it.

CC: The users of the testing room and the support staff are forever grateful that you provide food and coffee- but why do you do it?CB: I do it because I like to be helpful; I enjoy pleasing other people.

CC: The idea of tests are seen as dreadful to a majority of students do you like being surrounded by them daily?CB: To be totally honest, I need my breaks from them sometimes.

CC: What is your least favorite thing to do?CB: Could be a gazillion things. One thing I hate is leaving my house once I’ve gotten home.

CC: What is your hobby?CB: [Being] with my dogs.

CC: You are loved by many students and staff due to the environment you have created and your warmth - how do you feel about that?CB: I feel great about it.

CC: What is one piece of advice you would give to graduating seniors?CB: Don’t take life for granted because it’s too short.

teACher FeAture - ChriS bell

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13 December, 2012

BY RACHEL SALLY

Regardless of whether you’re a one-bite wonder, a slam dunker, or a twist-and-shouter, you’ve gotta love Oreos: crunchy dark-chocolate cookies that are slightly salty and bitter combined with a sweet and creamy filling. Add in a glass of milk and you’re in cookie heaven.It’s really hard not to like Oreos. Looking at the ingredients list, it gets a little easier. Are all of the additives and preservatives really necessary? In truth, they are, to maintain the Oreos’ nine month shelf life-- not quite on par with the indestructible Twinkie, but even so, cookies that don’t go bad raise eyebrows and concerns. The solution is clear: make your own. Your cookies will be tastier, fresher, free of preservatives, and will make you proud. They’ll impress your friends and terrify your enemies.

And they won’t last longer than ten minutes. I promise.

Recipe(Adapted from Stella Parks, pastry chef of Table 310)

Ingredients

For the cookies:6 ounces butter, room temperature7 1/2 ounces sugar3 ounces brown sugar1 tbsp kosher salt3/4 tsp baking powder1/2 tsp baking soda2 tsp instant coffee powder1 tbsp vanilla extract5 egg yolks8 ounces all-purpose flour or rice flour, sifted6 ounces extra dark cocoa powder, siftedcocoa for rolling out the dougha few teaspoons of hot water or coffee

For the filling:6 ounces butter or shortening10 ounces powdered sugar, sifted1 Tbsp vanilla extract1/4 tsp salt

Directions:Preheat the oven to 350°F. Cream the butter, sugars, baking powder and soda, espresso powder, salt, and vanilla just until combined. Dump in the flour and cocoa all at once and mix until a stiff dough forms. Dust a clean countertop with cocoa powder and roll the dough out to 1/8 of an inch thickness. Cut out two inch circles and place on cookie sheets. Once you’ve cut out as many circles as you can, gather the remaining scraps and mix with hot water until a thin paste forms; pipe this onto the cookies. Bake for nine minutes; rotate sheets once if your oven temperature isn’t even.

Making the filling:Cream everything together for 5 minutes (set a timer). Place one teaspoon of filling on every other cookie. Press another cookie on top.Enjoy!

Homemade Oreos

PHO

TO/\RACH

EL SALLY

If Jesus was a cookie . . .

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By MANSI VOHRA

Get out those headphones, do a little downloading, and enjoy some rock-folk-indie-jazz-classical [eclec-tic] music.

If you need some of that old rock and roll...

1. Dani California, Red Hot Chili Peppers: Black bandana, sweet Loui-siana, robbin’ on a bank in the state of Indiana -- In this song, RHCP im-mediately gives you that Midwest-hip-pie-loving vibe that you’ve known but forgotten; a life’s worth of “Call Me Maybe” can do that to you. “Dani Cali-fornia” is about a girl named Dani and her story from when she was born in Mississippi to when she was killed by a man “gunnin [from North Dakota]”. Next time you listen, follow closely and figure out what happened to the girl the group has featured numerous times in their songs.

2. Rock ‘n’ Roll, Lou Reed: We all know about the smash hit that swept the 1970s: Lou Reed’s “Walk On the Wild Side.” But, don’t forget that the former Velvet Underground leader had other classics up his sleeve, too. Reed’s scat-like vocal approach in this song is akin to that of the Beatles in “Hey Jude” and the Rolling Stones in “Sympathy for the Devil”.

If you’re feeling old-timey...

3. It’s All Over Now, Baby Blue, Bob Dylan: When you listen to Dylan you probably listen to his most famous: “It Ain’t Me, Babe”, “Mr. Tambourine Man”, “Like A Rolling Stone” (how

does it feel?), etc. But, what you don’t know is that this one right here is a Dylan classic. As in most Dylan songs, he’s either saying Adieu to a broken relationship or describing some 1960s political fiasco. In this one, he’s bid-ding farewell to the titular “Baby Blue” whose identity still remains in ques-tion.

4. Thank You, Led Zeppelin: Be patient with this song; it takes tons of replays and rewinding to get adjusted to former lead singer Robert Plant’s high and low octave shifts. But make it past the refrain and on to Jimmy Page’s guitar solo beginning at 1:50 and you won’t be sorry.

Fun fact: Plant wrote the lyrics for his wife, Maureen.

If you need to be relaxed and soothed...

5. Love and Some Verses, Iron & Wine: It’s infectious; Sam Beam’s gen-tle voice and soft guitar strums find you during fourth period and become locked inside your ears for the rest of the day. Although Beam (stage name: Iron & Wine), is recognized by his calm, mellow tones, this song in par-ticular will ease those tense muscles.

6. Bookends, Simon & Garfun-kel: The combination of the lyrics and acoustic guitar produced by this fa-mous 1960s duo is haunting. Although it’s a short song -- only 1:19 minutes long -- the lyrics are dense enough in meaning for it to be five times that length.

7. Here Comes A Regular, The Re-placements: This 1970s band is the

definition of alternative rock. The Re-placements dedicated this particular song to anyone who’s a “regular” any-where. Although the rhythmic tones and acoustic guitar may channel sor-row -- the lyrics reassure that a regular is never really alone, because they’ll always be remembered at their café, store, shop, etc.

If you’re in the mood to jazz things up...

8. Let’s Do It, Ella Fitzgerald: Birds do it. Bees do it. Even educated fleas do it! Let’s do it; let’s fall in love. That voice, that singer, it can only be the one and only Ella. In her album “Pure Ella” -- a combination of two of her other 1950s albums -- America’s beloved jazz and song vocalist fills the air with her rich voice.

9. You Make Me Feel So Young, Frank Sinatra: Big band, big swing, big everything. If you love jazz, you love Sinatra.

10. I’m In A Dancing Mood, Dave Brubeck Quartet: The tune of this song initially sounds a lot like “Love Is Here to Stay” -- a song recorded numerously by Ella, Louie, Sinatra, Nat King Cole, and many others. Yet, towards the middle of this piece, the quartet (Dave Brubeck on piano, Paul Desmond on sax, Joe Morello on drums and Eugene Wright on bass) surprises you and adds their own twists and turns to the old jazz standard -- making the tune all the more enjoyable.

**If you want to get into that Chris-mukkah spirit, download Michael Bublé’s entire “Christmas” album.

don’t think or Judge, JuSt liSten

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15 December 3, 2012 A&

By KUPONO LIU

On Friday October 19, 2012, the Ithaca High School drama department pre-sented The Jury, a modern rendition of Twelve Angry Men, in the black box theater. A large amount of anticipation led up to this event, which sold out in every showing. An eclectic audience attended. ranging from young children, the elderly, parents, and teenagers. Despite the diversity in the crowd, the audience as a whole was very responsive and engaged. Ithaca High School’s The Jury took a modern perspective on Reginald Rose’s classic Twelve Angry Men by having women and men cast. A possible motive for this decision was to disregard the all-male selected juries of Rose’s time and to make this play more applicable to today’s society. It was very interesting to see which jurors were kept as men and which ones were made into women-- Jurors Two, Five, Seven, Ten, and Twelve were male but Jurors One, Three, Four, Six, Eight, Nine, and Eleven were female.

Although this play was accurate to the original for the most part, this rendi-tion failed to do the original justice in certain aspects. One aspect was the charac-terization of Juror Three, who was played by a woman. It was interesting to see a woman play this abrasive character, but in this production, it appeared as if Juror Three was just a little crazy or unstable. Another aspect that lessened the inten-sity of Reginald Rose’s original play was the fact that the directors left out Juror Three’s final monologue at the end of the play. In this production, Juror Three had no monologue and simply gave in to the majority. This decision rushed the ending of the play and failed to bring it to an effective conclusion. Juror Three’s monologue in the original play was the most crucial scene, because it displayed and summed up all of the harsh emotions and prejudices in the American court system. Although the play was very good, it would have been stronger if it had included this crucial emotional scene.

Despite a couple of shortcomings, there were several bright spots in this pro-duction. For example, Caleb Harris ’13 did a phenomenal job as Juror Ten. He embodied Juror Ten’s character spot-on. His acting showed years of experience and it appeared as if Caleb understood his character. He showed the emotions and gestures accurately, and nothing in his acting seemed to be forced. The stage crew did a commendable job with the stage setup, lighting, and sound. They made the most of a small space and said a lot with little props. This made the play focus on the ideals of the play rather than the physical setting. The lighting made the play more dramatic and the sound was of high quality.

Overall, Ithaca High School’s production of The Jury was a very commendable undertaking. It was an interesting rendition of the original play and was overall very entertaining. This was yet again another stellar performance by Ithaca High School’s drama department and will contribute to Ithaca High School’s reputa-tion for having an elite drama program that is well beyond its years.

Our Own Jury

By SIENA SCHICKEL

If you know anything about guitars, you probably know that all of the sound from an acoustic guitar comes from the body of the in-strument (the hollow part). Even electric guitars have a body made to feel like an acoustic guitar. But what if you just took the body of a guitar away? Add about four or six more strings, hook it up to an amp, and you’re looking at the basic idea behind the Chapman Stick.

In the early 1970’s, Emmett Chapman devel-oped a guitar technique called the “Free Hands” tapping method, where both hands are used to make sound from a guitar, rather than hav-ing one hand form chords with the other hand strumming. The first model of the Chapman Stick was shipped in 1974. Since then, pickup (electric) models and versions with different numbers of strings have been developed, giving a wider range of tones for this modern instru-ment.

When classifying the Chapman Stick, it’s hard to put it in just one category. Although it has its roots in the guitar family, the Chapman Stick is played like a piano, with the same con-cept of hitting the strings with “hammers.” One more thing that is unique to the instrument is the range of notes that can be played. Usually, musicians play either a baseline or melody. With a Chapman Stick, a baseline and melody can be played simultaneously, making solos sound like a room full of guitars.

the ChApMAn StiCk

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1� December 3, 2012 A&

By SIENA SCHICKEL

When you go to the movies, you typically expect to see something for around two hours, but in reality those fea-ture-length films are actually only a fraction of the viewing possibilities out there. Many short films have been produced that are worth noting, one of them being “The Lost and Found Shop.”

Directed by nine-teen-year-old Caleb Slain, this short film starts in a strange shop where everything lost, from a jacket to a child, can be found with the help of an impatient and irritable man. The story continues to follow a little girl’s search for a mem-ory she lost, and with the help of a little bit of cash, the shopkeeper agrees to look for it. When they finally do find the memory, they play it on something called a “memory

player,” which looks like a hybrid of an old box TV and a flatscreen. There’s an unexpected twist here, which I won’t give away, and the little girl runs off with her memory as happy as ever, while the rest of the people in The Lost and Found Shop look on, absorbing the shock of this plot shift.

This short little film gained international recognition, winning “Best Short Film” in both the National Film Festival for Talented Youth (NFFTY) and the CineYouth Film Festival (part of the Chicago International Film Festival), among other awards.

Although the act-ing is cheesy at some points, there was some

very nice camera work, and the story came full circle, giv-ing the end a nice sense of closure. Shot in about two days on a budget of $1,200, “The Lost and Found Shop” is an impressive piece, and it is definitely worth watching.

the loSt And Found Shop

PHO

TO/\PRO

VIDED

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and most of all,writers.email [email protected] for more information

A frame from the film.

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By PETER FREYStaff writer

National Football Conference: There are quite a few teams who have the potential to make deep playoff runs this year. The Packers, Saints, and Falcons all have good players and solid potential; however, in the end, my I’d bet on:

CHICAGO BEARS: Matt Forte is an animal, and it’s undeniable that he’s one of the best rushers in the league. Coming off of a fairly seri-ous injury, Forte has been racking up league-leading stats. Brandon Marshall is a capable receiver, and the last time he played with Jay Cut-ler they combined for his most pro-ductive season ever. Incidentally, this is also their greatest weakness-- Jay Cutler keeps trying to throw to people who aren’t Forte or Marshall. Devon Hester is acceptable, but Earl Bennett has no place holding the football. The team should be able to overcome these inexplicable deci-sions though, because their defense is no less than stellar. Led by Brian Urlacher, this downtrodden squad of misfits has come together to be-come the most successful defensive group in the league. Don’t count on them getting rings; there is more to the season than just making it within sight of the Lombardi.

American Football Conference: This conference is a joke. Peyton Manning is a living legend, and it’s all he can do to keep the Broncos de-cent. With Ben Roethlisberger out,

Steelers fans are using their yellow towels to mop up tears. The Ravens have lost all momentum after their star defensive player, Ray Lewis, took a season ending injury. And the Tex-ans, who were supposed to dominate the AFC, barely came back against the dismal one win MJD-less Jag-uars. Don’t worry though, because all is not lost. This conference still has a savior.

NEW ENGLAND PATRIOTS: This team isn’t just good in the AFC. It’s not just that they can step up to the table with the big boys. They raise the bar. Some would say that it should be illegal to start a quarter-back as magnificent as Tom Brady, but so far his pinpoint end zone bombs have gone unflagged. On the receiv-ing end of these passes is a group of weapons so skillful that if Jerry Rice in his prime was on the roster he’d ride bench. Gronkowski is notori-ous for going up over cornerbacks and linebackers alike and dragging multiple players behind him for a ten to fifteen yard minimum. Brandon Lloyd has best hands since Handrew Jackson, and tippy toes in bounds for a cool twenty yards in a pinch. Often overlooked, Julian “the Rough-Ridin’ Tackle-Breaker” Edelman is a danger to himself and those around him whenever he touches the ball. This many players haven’t been pushed to the turf by one man since Corey Dil-lon. Unfortunately, all is not peach-es and cream. Welker, formerly the leader of this attack, and often de-scribed as a demon in the slot, has a bad case of the drops. This may

be his last year on the team. On the ground, Danny Woodhead is easily able to slip between the monstrous blocks of leviathans Nate Solder and Sebastian Vollmer. If you’re having trouble picturing Vollmer, imagine that Drago dude from Rocky but on steroids and not a Russian. Stevan Ridley is the new LT, and it’s hard to imagine his body ever touching the turf. Meanwhile on Defense Vince “Big Man on Champus” Wilfork is putting blockers on the ground like nobody’s business. Brandon Spikes and Jerod “the New Juice” Mayo can play zone or crash the middle and produce either way. And don’t wor-ry about the weak secondary. Rookie Denard has been playing admirable defense, and new acquisition Aqib “No Respect for da Police” Talib has been picking and sixing almost non-stop. Did he stab a taxi driver in Tampa, or did he just intercept his torso with a knife?

That’s about it. Except for the most important component of all, that is. Bill “the Second Coming of Jesus” Belichick is as sharp as ever. If it weren’t for him, there would be hardly any players/coaches in the NFL whose dreams of stardom were crushed with such elegance and fi-nesse that they can’t help but become fans. He’s still drafting all-stars, he’s still reppin’ the hoodie, and he’s still blowing off other coaches with the handshake. Quake in fear Chicago, Buffalo, Green Bay, New Orleans, Denver, and any other teams out there. They are very, very real, and they are coming for you.

the win ColuMn

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18 December 3, 2012

By ARYEH ZAX

On October 22, Lance Armstrong was stripped of his seven Tour de France titles (won from 1999 to 2005) due to his involvement in a massive dop-ing scandal.

To say that this is a heavy blow to cycling is an understatement. Armstrong, the come-from-behind cancer survivor who rose to the top of the sport, has long been cycling’s poster child; he’s the first person who comes to mind when cycling or the Tour are mentioned. Now his image is perma-nently marred, and the sport has taken a heavy hit. It doesn’t help that the Tour de France titles can’t just be redistributed to the second place win-ners the years that Armstrong won, since 19 of the other top 21 top three finishers in those years have also been caught doping.

Armstrong has stepped down from the head of his cancer foundation, and his corporate spon-sors have all severed ties with him. Pat McQuaid, president of the International Cycling Union, said of Armstrong, “[He] has no place in cycling and he deserves to be forgotten in cycling.”

In recent years, performance-enhancing drugs (PEDs) have become a much larger problem in professional sports. Many high-profile base-ball players - including Alex Rodriguez, Manny Ramirez, and of course Barry Bonds - have had their careers destroyed by their use of steroids and other PEDs. Major League Baseball only started testing for PEDs in 2004, and already 67 players have been suspended. That doesn’t count players who’ve made it past the tests or those whose drug use came to light via whistleblowers.

PEDs are used for many reasons - athletes can be under too much pressure to perform, or just be looking for an unfair edge over the competi-tion. The Tour de Lance isn’t the first scandal cen-tered around an all-star athlete, and it won’t be the last. If the professional athletics scene is going to change, it doesn’t just need harder, more frequent drug testing. It needs to stop producing a culture that encourages athletes to take moral shortcuts for improved performance. How and if that’ll hap-pen isn’t clear, but until it does, professional ath-letes will still dope.

tour de lAnCe: ArMStrong Stripped oF titleS in doping

SCAndAlBy RUBIN DANBERG-BIGGS

We’re all too accustomed to hearing tragic stories from Britain and else-where in Europe of fans being maimed and killed in stadiums, but over the past several years these “freak accidents” have made their way across the pond. When anywhere from 20 to 100,00 people are placed in tight con-fines there is always the presence of danger. When you add to the equa-tion copious amounts of alcohol and high tension over the outcome of the game, the chance for injury becomes very real. However, there has been a definite increase in the frequency of such incidents recently, which begs the question; are our stadiums becoming unsafe?

First we should visit Hillsborough, England in 1988 for bit of perspec-tive. A Football Association cup semifinal match between the Liverpool and Nottingham Forest soccer clubs ended in disaster as a massive wave of fans mobbed one another in a small space resulting in 96 deaths and 766 injuries, in what is now known as the Hillsborough Disaster. Back in the states it has never been this severe; however, in this NFL season a fan fell twenty feet off an escalator at Metlife Stadium in New Jersey. It doesn’t stop there-- in the summer of 2011 at Rangers Ballpark in Arlington a man toppled over a railing, falling headfirst to his death between the wall of the field and the bleachers. In August of 2012 at Reliant Stadium in Houston, a man fell sixty feet to his death during a Texans vs. Vikings NFL game.

The list of incidents continues and the evidence that stadiums are unsafe seems to mount-- stadiums are without question more unsafe than they used to be. Unfortunately for stadium-goers it is because of a combination of two very fun aspects of stadiums: alcohol and how massively, amaz-ingly, mind-bogglingly enormous they are. Of course the rate of alcohol consumption is not significantly greater than in years prior, and it’s worth noting that both Major League Baseball and the NFL have rules about how late in the game one can consume alcohol. However, these rules are some-what ridiculous as everyone knows that anyone who wants to can get just as drunk in two and a half hours as they can in three. The issue that has de-veloped has not come from a change in drinking habits but rather a change in the sheer altitude at which people are sitting and the intricate patterns of escalators and stairs that one must traverse to reach the bottom floor of a new professional stadium. In the past two decades, twelve new NFL stadiums have opened and more are on the way, each bigger than the last. This isn’t to say that drunk fans simply topple over railings while walking down to use the bathroom, but as tens of thousands of people push down escalators to get to their cars, it becomes far more likely that one impaired fan will lose his or her balance. What it comes down to is the propensity of fans to overdrink and the disregard of this fact by stadium designers.

So if you’re planning on heading to a professional stadium, be safe and be sober and you should be alright in any stadium you choose. Except Texas. Don’t go to Texas. Twice in two years? Come on. Also don’t go to

Cleveland. That’s just a bad place to be.

tAke Me out to the bAllgAMe;

CheerFul Song or griM reAlitY?

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PHO

TO/\PRO

VIDED

19 December 3, 2012

By DAVID STEIN

Do you enjoy facial hair? Well, you’re not alone. In fact, facial hair en-thusiasts from all over the world gather every other year to contend in one of the fiercest competitions in sport: The World Beard and Moustache Champi-onships. This gathering of the world’s top beard and moustache competitors is frequented by facial hair behemoths like Michael “Atters” Attree and Karl Heinz-Hill. I know what you’re think-ing, and yes, I am referring to that Karl Heinz-Hill, the very same Karl Heinz-Hill who made famous the Imperial Partial Beard. What do all World Beard and Moustache contestants have in common? Three things: a thirst to be the best, a flamboyant sense of style, and of course, a healthy supply of mous-tache wax!

The World Beard and Moustache Championships or WBMC traces its origins all the way back to 1995 when the first competition was held in Ger-many. The majority of the WBMC have been held in Europe although there have been two in the U.S. Since

its humble beginnings, the WBMC has blossomed into an international event with athletes from over ten different countries representing their homelands.

There are three categories of fa-cial hair in which enthusiasts may compete: Moustache, Full Beard, and Partial Beard. All three major categories have several sub-catego-ries such as Free-style, Imperial, and Natural. Each class has its own set of rules and restrictions ranging from no aid allowed (no waxes, or gels) to minimum length and width.

Although Team Germany, for the most part, has dominated the sport, other teams including Team U.S. have begun to become competitive. As this sport continues to gain popularity all over the world, we can expect to see many new facial hair aficionados vying for the highly coveted title of World’s Best Beard. If you, or a loved one, are both capable of and interested in growing a beard or moustache for the competition, visit Team USA’s official website and find a local chapter near you!

wACkY Sport: hAirY CoMpetition

By ALEKSA BASARA

You’ve probably seen them on the wrists of countless celebrities and ath-letes during appearances or matches. In fact, these $30 power bands are used by icons such as Kate Middleton, Robert DeNiro, and Shaquille O’Neil. Clearly, their popularity isn’t in ques-tion; however, their performance is.

Power Balance, a California-based company, is a producer of these bands We all know the basic claim that the bands improve balance, strength, and flexibility. In an attempt to commu-nicate the consumer about how they work, the US Power Balance website explained, “Power Balance is designed to resonate with and respond to the natural energy field of the body.” An-other producer, EFX, claimed that the product will “harmonize with the

body’s naturally occurring bioelectric frequencies.”

The theme here is that the human body has an energy field, and that these bands are meant to interact with it and improve physical capabilities. To investigate how this works, Harri-et Hall, a retired medical professional, contacted Power Balance. She asked how to measure the “frequency” that supposedly holds our cells together; she received no reply. Hall claimed that the producers of these companies rely on intelligent marketing and fa-mous endorsers. As for the scientific claim, the Australian branch of Power Balance has admitted that there is none.

If so many athletes believe that the bands work, why don’t the compa-nies have more faith in their product? In fact, popularity among the celeb-

rity clientele is one of the things that power band companies pride them-selves on the most. They know there is no scientific claim that the bands interact with surrounding energy. Nowadays, companies just advertise the product’s good looks and por-tability. However, this doesn’t mean the positive effects of the bands are a complete sham; whatever influence they have is most likely a placebo.

So long as athletes believe that the bands work, their performance may improve. Many top athletes have a certain routine they follow before each competition, helping them men-tally prepare themselves for the chal-lenge - is this really that different? If an athlete’s convinced the power band is just a bracelet, it’ll probably have no effect.The true power is in the athlete’s ability to believe.

power in A bAnd?

A fierce competitor readies his beard for battle.

Page 20: December 3, 2012 • Est . 1892 • Vol. 121 • No.4• Published ... · Ithaca High School half page (10 x 8) Mathnasium jor in. There are 4,168 colleges in the United States, including

By TOVA WILENKSYStaff writer

1. It’s a snow day! How do you celebrate?

a. Run outside and play in the snow

b. Invite all your friends over to see a movie

c. Decorate the house with paper snowflakes

d. Get ahead on homework for the next day

e. Go back to sleep!

2. You are meeting your friend at the ice rink but they are late. What do you do before they get there?

a. Practice your skating on the ice

b. Start a conversation with the skate rental guy

c. Try and figure out how to put your ice skates on and get tangled up in the laces

d. Read all the flyers about winter skating programs and compare prices

e. Buy a sticky cinnamon bun from the concession

3. For the holidays, you’ll probably give your parents:

a. Warm winter glovesb. Money for a special night

outc. A card with your gift wish-

list in itd. New books

e. A half-eaten bag of chips (you got hungry)

4. On a cold Saturday, the roads are closed because of ice, so you’re stuck at home. What do you do?

a. Try to skate on the ice in the street

b. Spend the whole day on the phone and use up your phone bill limit…

c. Go on a cleaning frenzy and clean the entire house

d. Curl up with a thick book and plate of warm cookies

e. Watch TV and pay your little brother $1 every time he makes you hot cocoa

5. Your aunt always gets you great holiday presents. This year, you are hoping for:

a. A neon striped duffel bagb. Bags of gummy worms in

bulk, to share with your friendsc. Bacon-scented lip balmd. A bright polka-dotted

book lighte. A fuzzy fleece pillow

6. During the winter, which will you miss the most?

a. Swimming!b. Not having to wear a coatc. Being outside a lotd. Going bird-watching in

the parke. TV programs that AREN’T

Christmas specials

7. What movie will you see this winter?

a. Skyfallb. Breaking Dawn Part IIc. Tinkerbell and the Secret

of the Wingsd. The Hobbit: An Unex-

pected Journeye. Wreck It Ralph

8. What is one goal you want to accomplish by the end of 2012?

a. Improving your victory dance for when you win a championship

b. Watching the world NOT end

c. Finding buried treasure in your backyard

d. Reading between 902 and 1,379 poems total this year

e. Memorizing lines from an entire season of Big Bang Theory

9. It is a Thursday afternoon and it just snowed two feet. What would you do?

a. Make a maze in the drive-way by shoveling snow

b. Make a long line of snow angels

c. Build a giant snowpersond. Draw doodles in the

fogged-up windowse. Turn the TV to the Weath-

er Channel to see if there will be a snow day

whAt pArtY Should You throw thiS winter?ResultsMostly a’s: Throw a sled

party! Stock up on tons of different kinds of sleds, find a good hill, and invite your friends!

Mostly b’s: Create an in-door “beach” in your home and throw a “Summer in Winter” party! Tell your guests to bring beach towels to sit on and watch a sum-mer movie while eating popsicles and drinking lem-onade.

Mostly c’s: Have a snow-man-building contest! Have a supply of branches, car-rots, scarves, and hats. Have a parent or someone else be the judge for all the snow-men to judge the guests’ creations. The winner gets a giant pack of hot cocoa mix.

Mostly d’s: Throw an ig-loo party! Invite people over to build a snow igloo out-side, and make it big enough so everyone can sit inside it. When it’s done, bring every-one inside it for hot cocoa!

Mostly e’s: Have a snow-cone party! Invest in choc-olate, strawberry, butter-scotch, peanut butter, and maple syrup to put on the snow cones. Add other top-pings like Oreos, sprinkles, chocolate chips, and fruit as well.

help wAntedThe Tattler needs

cartoonists, photographers,

and most of all,writers.email [email protected] for more information

Page 21: December 3, 2012 • Est . 1892 • Vol. 121 • No.4• Published ... · Ithaca High School half page (10 x 8) Mathnasium jor in. There are 4,168 colleges in the United States, including

If you like what you see (or don’t), submit your own content! Submit cartoons, photography,

questions, comments, stories, letters of complaint (or praise), or literary pieces. Hey, maybe you’ll see your name printed on this

page.Drop off your stuff at

Backpage Editor E-mail:[email protected]

So what are you waiting for? I’m waiting formy soufflé of your thoughts. Chop chop.

Advanced Dental TechnologyOF ITHACA I I , PLLC

THE gentle care YOU WANT,

THE personal attention THAT YOU DESER VE.

Dr. Marcia Zax

1301 Trumansburg Road Suite S, ITHACA 607-273-5940 www.advancedentaltech.com

SM

21 December 3, 2012 PENULTIMATE

CArtoonS

The Tattler Literary January Issue 2013 needs cartoonists! If you’re interested in submitting your own original cartoons, please email [email protected] or drop off your submission in the box in

the main office by Dec. 20.

Page 22: December 3, 2012 • Est . 1892 • Vol. 121 • No.4• Published ... · Ithaca High School half page (10 x 8) Mathnasium jor in. There are 4,168 colleges in the United States, including

22 December 3, 2012 PENULTIMATE

ASk dAnelle:

respond.we want to hear what you have

to say.

[email protected]

Or pick up a Letter to the Editor form

outside The Tattler office in H Courtyard.

writeemail [email protected]

Dear Danelle,Christmas is coming up and there is

someone I really like. How do I make my life a Christmas love story?

Sean

Dear Sean (pronounced “seen”),

Don’t worry, everyone faces this challenge. Fortunately, over the years, one of Earth’s greatest species has de-veloped simple and easy guidelines to woo the opposite sex. I’m talking about, of course, the dolphin. There are only three easy steps:

First, express interest. Get your significant-other-to-be to notice you, for who you are. Let that person know you are a fun, creative, and in-teresting person who looks to me for advice. Stress the looking to me for advice part.

Second, act. Make your move. Don’t be late, procrastinate! Or something like that.

Third, panic. This step is optional. If you realize that you actually hate this person and everything about them, now is a good time to panic. Then get out of the sticky situation.

Let’s get into more detail about each step.

There are plenty of ways to ex-press your interest. You could just google it and find some answers on-line, but people who write advice are generally stupid. *Pause*. You could resort to something simple, like mis-tletoes and chocolate, but why would you want to be normal? That only leads to sustainable, healthy relation-ships and nobody wants that, right?

One great way to show your af-

fection is through a Secret-Santa sys-tem. Find (preferably rich) friends and force them to join, including your love interest. Here comes the easy part. Rig each Secret-Santa card so that you give your soon-to-be lov-er a present and everyone else gives their present to you. (The key is to make sure that no one notices.)

Then, when Christmas comes, pick every present except the worst one and keep it. Give the worst one to that special someone. That’ll get his/her attention.

Now, to act. By this point, your beloved should know who you are. Once again, you could just be boring and say “I love you,” but that’s direct and straightforward. An equally bad but much more entertaining way to confess your love is by a note in their locker. Unfortunately, statistical analysis shows that you’ll fail miser-ably and put the note in the wrong locker 9 times out of 10. (Sample was taken from TV shows.)

The best way, by far, is by using the arts. Sing a song, write poetry, paint a picture, etc. If you choose to do a song, write the lyrics and pick a well-respected tune, like Rebecca Black’s “Friday.” An equally respect-ed tune is Nicole Westbrook’s “It’s Thanksgiving.” Nothing says respect like a red lightsaber where the likes normally are. If you choose poetry, be sure drop lines from “The Note-book” like nobody’s business, be-cause every love quote on the inter-net is from that movie. If you have to draw a picture, and you can’t draw, just print out something by Michel-angelo or da Vinci and say you drew

it. Works every time. So you acted, and for some rea-

son you’re still following my advice. Great! Now you might have realized you hate your true love, and want to get rid of him/her. Be sure to first try hurting their feelings. If that doesn’t work, you’ll have to not hurt their feelings, which is very ineffective and bad.

Nevertheless, it’s still possible. I have a patent pending for conver-sation enders. Here are a few good ones:

“In a world...” and continue with anything hypothetical.

“I should have gone for plastic wrap, not tinfoil.”

“If success was guaranteed and failure was not an option, what would I desire to do?”

Also, you could pretend to have a disease. Go for STDs, they’re some of the creepiest. If you’re ever caught without a disease, there’s a simple formula to make one up. Generally, they go along the lines of: Adjective + Noun + Disorder. Some great ones are: Saturday Night Palsy, Slapped-Face Disease, and Supernumerary Nipple Syndrome.

(Note: Do not google image these. Some things cannot be forgot-ten.)

If you follow these steps, there is no way you won’t ever not never have not a bad Christmas wonder-fully. Maybe.

Wishing you nothing more than a Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year,

Danelle Agular

Page 23: December 3, 2012 • Est . 1892 • Vol. 121 • No.4• Published ... · Ithaca High School half page (10 x 8) Mathnasium jor in. There are 4,168 colleges in the United States, including

23 December 3, 2012 PENULTIMATE

Civic Engagement and LeadershipMock Trial Club (Tuesday, E-31, Mr. Barnes)Model UN (Thursday, G-212, Mr. Hind)Site Based Council (Thurs, 6:30pm , Library, Mr. Mellander)Speech and Debate Club (Thurs, H-213, Ms. Seifert)Student Council (Mon, H-107, Ms. Zolnik)The Tattler (Thurs, E-25, Mrs. Lynn)WIHS Announcements (M-F, 8:45 am, B-3, Mrs. Linton)World Affairs Club (Tues, G-202, Mr. Benjamin)Yearbook (Tues, F-3, Ms. Amodeo)

Helping OthersGay-Straight Alliance (Thurs, G-213, Ms. Cole)Habitat for Humanity (Mon, G-208, Mr. Thompson)Invisible Children (Mon, G-110, Ms. Gorbold)Key Club (Mon, H-206, Ms. Gefell)Liberty in North Korea (Tues, H-214, Ms. Sheridan)Love Knows No Bounds (Wed., The Hub, Ms. Reitenbach)Red Cross Club (Tues, G-219, Mr. Ballard)SWIS (Thurs, G-208, Ms. Schwan)

World CultureAfrican-Latino Club (Thurs, D-7, Mrs. Richardson)Asian-American Club (Thurs, G-204, Ms. Redfield)French Club (Mon, K-1, Mrs. Bowman)German Culture Club (Mon, K-4, Mrs. O’Dell)International Club (Tues, K-19, Mrs. Bergman)Jewish Culture Club (Tues, K-102, Mrs. Kennedy)

The ArtsA Cappella Club (Thurs, 8:05 am, H-109, Mr. Lesser)Choir (Tues/Thurs, Choir Room, Mr. Loomis)Drama Productions (Mrs. Tino, Ms. McKown)

Fiddle Club (Tues, Orchestra Room, Ms. Hecht)Inklings (Mon, Library Lab, Mr. Reiff)Morning Strings (Thurs, Kulp, Mr. Antoine)The Players (Starting Jan., Mr. Scarpulla) Urban Art Club (Tues, D-5, Ms. Lutter)

Science, Math, TechnologyAquarium Club (Fri, 8:05 am, H-104, Mr. Johnson)Baking Club (Mon, G-205, Mr. Thompson)Brain Team (Mon, H-218, Mr. Kirk)Code Red Robotics (Tues, E-1, Mr. Krywe)Green Team (Mon, E-45, Mrs. Benenati)Math Team (Tues, H-211, Mr. Deppe)RC Car Club (Tues, E-11, Mr. Sauve)Science Olympiad (Mon, H-113, Mrs. Jewett)Tech Student Association (Mon/Thurs, E-11, Mr. Sauve)TV Production (Wed, Various locations, See Mr. Nunn)

Athletics and GamesArchery Club (Mon, 8:05 am, New Gym, Mr. Stone)Hip Hop/Jazz (Monday, Dance Studio, Dr. Nunn)Intramural Basketball (Tues 8:05 am, Thurs 3:45 pm, Sat 7-9 pm, New Gym, Mr. Nunn)Intramural Soccer (TBD, see Mr. Carver or Ms. Cole)Juggling Club (Thurs, York, Ms. Maddren)Ping Pong Club (Thurs, Activities, Mr. Jordan)Rock Climbing (Thurs, Interactive Gym, Mr. Dumont)Ski Club (Thurs, Greek Peak, Mr. Noyes)Strength and Conditioning (Tues/Thurs, Weight Room, Mr. Desouza)Tiddlywinks Club (Tues, G-202, Mr. Drix)Ultimate Frisbee Club (Thurs, Activities, Mr. Mellander)Zumba (Thurs, Dance Studio, Mrs. Grainger)

What Can I Do at IHS Outside of Classes?Here’s a list of IHS’s extracurricular activities that ALL IHS students can join!

See the advisor for questions, and check out the Student Activities bulletin board in H building near H-111.

ADVERTISE

with us

email [email protected]

Page 24: December 3, 2012 • Est . 1892 • Vol. 121 • No.4• Published ... · Ithaca High School half page (10 x 8) Mathnasium jor in. There are 4,168 colleges in the United States, including

Horoscopes

Sudoku

November Solution:

Sagittarius (November 22 to December 21): So last month the stars changed their alignment or whatever the explanation for horoscopes is and... anyways a different set of stars wrote the horo-scopes, leading to confusion for which ones were whose... so this month will be less con-fusing, and the horoscopes will have more meaning. BTW HaPPy biRTHdAY!

Capricorn (December 22 to January 19): How will you react to this horoscope? Here’s the breakdown: 5%- ugh; 10%- I don’t know; 105%- in-ception.

Aquarius (January 20 to February 18): Spend the day brainstorming New Years res-olutions. Make sure that they are reasonable, require dili-gence, and are easy to break.

Pisces (February 19 to March 20): OBAMA! And something else about perse-verance, racism, and Donald Trump. Unless you are a Re-publican, Green, Libertarian, or Pokemon-closing-movie-theme-song fan... (Herman

Cain 2006.5!) Aries (March 21 to April

19): Christmas is coming up! Be sure to grub all your friends, family, and relatives for presents, and when you “forget” theirs give them the ones you don’t like! A Christ-mas miracle.

Taurus (April 20 to May 20): If you personalize a horo-scope on a horoscope web-site, and you call yourself a bad word, it’s like the website calling you a bad word.

Gemini (May 21 to June 20): In these tough times, teens become addicted to many things, including the deadly solitaire, minesweep-er, or hearts. Why can’t we convert the bad energy and be addicted to helpful things like being lazy and procrasti-nating?

Cancer (June 21 to July 22): SAT season is approach-ing! Here is your daily math review problem: If two wrongs make a right and three lefts make a right, than do three diagonals and seven ups make a soda?

Leo (July 23 to August 22): Samsung or Apple? Chicken or the Egg? Democrat or Re-publican? Coke and Sprite or Pepsi and Sierra Mist? Leo or a different horoscope? An-swers: Yes, yes, yes, yes, chick-en mcnuggets.

Virgo (August 23 to Sep-tember 22): I foresee you be-ing tardy for the class that requires you to pass through G-hallway. Don’t fret, it can be avoided if you bring your cat-tle prod, Calvin and Hobbes edition.

Libra (September 23 to October 22): Libra sounds like Libya. There’s a revolu-tion over there. In other news, your cat just pooped on your front door. Don’t have a cat? Get one, so it can poop on your front door.

Scorpio (October 23 to November 21): You will read every word of the Tattler. Write a creative piece on your work discussing your inner feelings regarding the paper as a whole, and turn it in for homework (and send it to us).

Gay James Bond

Ms. Petrillose when she straightens her hair

Gary Johnson’s 1% voting party

Submitting creative writing to the Tattler for

the literary issue

CYBER MONDAY

Seth Cohen

The amount of weight Jordan Hill lost

Pancake breakfasts

Tests the day before break

Grey Thursday

Surprise brown spots on bananas


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