Effectively Influencing Otherscchospice.org/wp-content/uploads/2019/09/J.-Porter-B3.pdf ·...

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Janet E. Porter, PhD

Adjunct Professor

University of North Carolina at Chapel Hill

Board Chair, Hospice Care of the Lowcountry

[email protected]

617-909-8109

Effectively Influencing Others

Click to edit Master title styleLeadershipIf you think you are leading,


look behind you,


look behind you,

if there is no one there, you are not leading,


look behind you,

if there is no one there, you are not leading,

you are only taking a walk.


Click to edit Master title styleGetting MADD – Influencing Others





SINCE 1980 MADD THE NUMBER

OF PEOPLE KILLED ANNUALLY HAS

DECREASED FROM MORE THAN

25,000 TO LESS THAN 10,000 PER

YEAR….SAVING THE LIVES OF

MORE THAN 300,000 PEOPLE


MADD HAS HELPED SAVE NEARLY

30,000 YOUNG LIVES THROUGH

PASSAGE OF THE 21 MINIMUM

DRINKING AGE LAW…..








MADD HAS HELPED SAVE NEARLY

30,000 YOUNG LIVES THROUGH

PASSAGE OF THE 21 MINIMUM

DRINKING AGE LAW…..







AND YET TODAY

CAR CRASHES ARE THE LEADING

CAUSE OF DEATH FOR TEENS,

AND ABOUT A QUARTER OF THOSE

CRASHES INVOLVE AN UNDERAGE

DRINKING DRIVER.


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John Van Hengel


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John Van Hengel

• Born in Wisconsin, son of a nurse and pharmacist

• Graduated from college, became beach bun

• Married, two sons, divorced

• Injured working in a rock quarry at 40

• Age 44 took a vow of poverty

• Lived in donated room above garage, secondhand clothes, ate at soup

kitchens


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John Van Hengel

• Born in Wisconsin, son of a nurse and pharmacist

• Graduated from college, became beach bun

• Married, two sons, divorced

• Injured working in a rock quarry at 40

• Age 44 took a vow of poverty

• Lived in donated room above garage, secondhand clothes, ate at soup

kitchens

• Founded first food bank in America – St. Mary’s in Phoenix - 1967

• “Father of Food Banking”

• Started Second Harvest

• Mother Teresa Lifetime Achievement Award

• Humanitarian Congressional Award

• Knighted

Click to edit Master title styleWhat is the Most Popular Business Book of All Time?



Click to edit Master title stylePersonal Preference or Inclination

1. Find a pen or pencil and a piece of

paper.

2. Quickly sign your name the way you

typically sign a check or other document.

S-1

Click to edit Master title stylePersonal Preference or Inclination

1. Find a pen or pencil and a piece of

paper.

2. Quickly sign your name the way you

typically sign a check or other document.

3. Move your pen or pencil to your other hand and sign

your name again.

S-1

Click to edit Master title styleSelf-Assessments

• Provide insight into your own style

• Provide a framework for thinking about other’s

styles

• Answer with your first instinct, don’t over-think

your answer

• Truest results is when you answer as you really

are – not as you want others to see you

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Click to edit Master title styleInfluence Style Indicator

• Developed by Discovery Learning in support of

the Center for Creative Leadership (ccl.org)

• Instrument to measure your influencing style –

your approach to influencing others and being

influenced

• Provides a model for understanding others


Step 4 plot your score below

©2011 Discovery Learning, Inc. All Rights Reserved








Influence Orientation

©2011 Discovery Learning, Inc. All Rights Reserved.

Influence Orientations


You look for compromises and make concessions to reach outcomes that satisfy your greater interest.

You put forward your ideas and offer logical, rational reasons to convince others of your point of view.

You insist that your ideas are heard and considered and you challenge the ideas of others.

You advocate your position and encourage others with a sense of shared purpose and exciting possibilities.

You build relationships and connect with others through listening, understanding and building coalitions.

Influence Styles

Click to edit Master title styleAsserting StyleStating preferences clearly and applying pressure

This style looks like:

• Pushing your perspectives, ideas and beliefs

• Insisting that your ideas are heard and considered even when

others disagree

• Putting forward ideas even if they are not popular

• Challenging ideas and suggestions that you disagree with

• Using structure (rules, laws, policies) to emphasize legitimacy

• Letting people know exactly where you stand

• Using power, rewards, consequences

This style sounds like:

“Why don’t we talk about the elephant in the room?”

“The policy requires that we….”

“That’s unacceptable to me under any circumstances.”

“I am 100% certain that….”

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Click to edit Master title styleRationalizing StyleUsing logic and reasoning to present your ideas


• Pushing your perspectives, ideas and beliefs

• Offering rational reasons to convince others of your point of

view

• Suggesting logical solutions to problems

• Presenting arguments that are analytically based

• Creating a logical flow to your arguments

• Using relevant facts and data to convince others

• Using expert views and/or historical data to build a

convincing position.


“The facts suggest….”

“Our analysis of this situation shows that….”

“What information do you need?”

“The only logical solution is to….”

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Inspiring StyleInfluencing others through shared purpose ad

higher possibilities.

This Style looks like:

• Pulling people together and toward your points of view.

• Advocating your position by encouraging others with a sense of shared

purpose.

• Communicating your vision for the best outcome.

• Helping others see the exciting possibilities in a situation.

• Enthusiastically presenting your ideas.

• Appealing to people’s hopes and dreams to gain their support.

• Using stories and to appeal to the emotions of others.

This Style sounds like:

• “Just think of what this can mean to the future if….”

• “We are arguing about pennies when this approach will save millions.”

• “Imagine if we could figure this out what an impact we would have

on…”

Click to edit Master title styleBridging StyleEngaging and connecting with others


• Pulling people together and toward your point of view.

• Connecting with others through building coalitions and communities

based upon common interest.

• Working hard to establish a climate of trust.

• Listening carefully to what others have to say.

• Acknowledging the needs and concerns of the other party.

• Sharing appreciation for other people’s issues and needs.

• Asking questions to seek understanding of others’ viewpoint.


• “I think I understand your dilemma so you can help me understand

why..”

• “I had this same issue last year and let me tell you what we learned…”

• “It sounds like the three of us have a common agenda. If we just…”

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Negotiating StyleCompromising and making concessions to find

common ground


• Orienting toward tradeoffs and compromises

• Willing to make concessions in order to reach an outcome

that satisfies the greater interest

• Getting support for your ideas by offering to help others in

some way

• Bargaining to reach agreement when something is important

to you

• Exchanging favors in order to get something accomplished

• Highlighting points of agreement and mutual benefit.


“If you will…..than I can…”

“I will support you in the meeting tomorrow if when my project

is presented the next quarter, you will….”

“I know this is not a long-term solution to all your issues but it

does provide a way forward so that we can both….”

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Click to edit Master title stylePeer Coaching

• Pair up with someone of a different influence style than

yours.

• Describe a major change you would like to make in the

world and why. What is your argument for why this

change is important?

• The peer coach provides you feedback on how you

might be more persuasive.

• Then you switch places.

Click to edit Master title styleTo Influence Effectively

• Increase your consciousness about your own approach to influencing others

• Listen to understand other’s perspective • Develop skills at assessing others’

influence style • Customize your argument to the audience• For major conversations, have data AND a

story AND what’s in it for me AND a vision…

• Demonstrate concern for others as well as self

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