FUSION STAR TREKTo Boldly Go for Ignition (Tenatively)

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“Fusion Star Trek — To Boldly Go for Ignition(Tentatively)”

A Play in Four Acts (if you can call it acting) and used to engenderconsensus at Snowmass, July 1999 (Well, perhaps not…..)

Narrator Fusion, the final frontier! These are the voyages of the starship

Compromise . Its five-year mission, to seek out new worlds and

civilizations – especially those strange galaxies at the extremes of

the universe, in the forlorn attempt to find someone that has

discovered how to make fusion actually work. To boldly go in

fusion where no plasma physicist has boldly gone before, er …..

tentatively?

SCENE 1:StarFleet Federation

HeadquartersStarDate: 2999

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Scene 1. StarFleet Federation Headquarters

[Dramatis personae Scene 1: Narrator, Anne Davies, Ronald Blanken, Mike Roberts ,

two OFES staff members, Captain James T. Goldston]

Narrator The year is Stardate 2999. Intergalactic space travel via warp-drive

has now been in use for the past 500 years. Matter transfer via

transporters is routine. And fusion is now only 30 years away!

But, to be fair, the Federation fusion program has been dealing with

a much more important problem than fusion energy for the past

1000 years, – How to keep working secretly on ITER without being

found out by Congress!

So, the year is 2999. Let me take you now to the StarFleet Fusion

Command Headquarters. Now, because of the threat from attack

from alien civilizations, the Federation Headquarters is housed in a

dark, gloomy, labyrinthine systems of underground tunnels that go

on forever and where daylight has never penetrated.

Voice You must mean DOE Germantown!

Narrator Precisely! Anyway, in the center of this underground netherworld,

the head of StarFleet’s Fusion Program, Admiral Anne Davies, is

chairing her Monday morning staff meeting……

(All except Davies and Narrator are asleep, snoring loudly)

Davies Okay you lot, wake up, wake up!

(All wake up with a start),

OFES staff 1 What? What? Time to go home already? I’ve only just dropped off!

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Davies Come on you lot. Wake up! It’s time to go through the proposals

for this year’s ICC competition.

OFES staff 1 ICC?

Davies Yes – “Innovative Confinement Concepts”. We have reviewed all

the proposals and now we have to decide who has won.

OFES staff 2 But doesn’t Princeton always win?

Davies Yes, yes of course they always win. But they always submit a blank

form and we have to fill it in for them, (Turns to Blanken), Okay Ron

Blanken, which Princeton proposal, -- whoops! I mean, which

fusion community proposal has won this year?

Blanken (Looks apprehensive) Well Admiral Davies….. I’m afraid the winners

aren’t from Princeton this year

Davies What?

Blanken Yes, we’ve had two real proposals this year that look like they may

actually work!

Davies What! Oh, very well, let’s hear them

Blanken The first one is from Charlie Baker’s group at UCSD, It’s a cloaking

device.

Roberts A cloaking device?

Blanken Yes, it would enable us to keep working on ITER without being

detected by Congress!

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Davies (Face lights up) Aha! I like it. And the second proposal?

Blanken The second proposal is from MIT. It’s a time machine.

OFES staff 1 A time machine?

Roberts What’s a time machine got to do with fusion?

Blanken We’ll first of all, its much easier to build than a fusion reactor.

Davies Yes, everyone knows that. And so?

Blanken Well according to the proposal, MIT’s historical research has shown

that in the year 1999, fusion was only 50 years away.

Davies Yes, and so?

Blanken And they discovered that back in 1980, fusion was only 30 years

away.

Davies Yes, yes and so?

Blanken And in 1960, fusion was only 15 years away. So MIT has realized if

they plotted this data and backwards-extrapolated it, we must have

had fusion in the year 1952! They’re proposing to use the time

machine to go back to 1952 to find it!

(pause)

(looks to Marshall R in the audience.) And Marshall can confirm that it

was true!

Davies Wonderful! How much is the time machine?

Blanken (Scanning proposal) Er….. twenty-three-dollars and fifteen cents

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OFES staff 2 (Looks puzzled) That’s very cheap for a time machine.

Blanken (Still reading proposal). Yes, but they’re having the Italians build it

for them. That’s why its so cheap. It would be 3-trillion-dollars

under DOE costing rules

Davies Well that’s settled then. We’ll fund both the cloaking device and the

time machine.

OFES staff 2 But, of course, we’ll build them both at Princeton?

Davies Of course!

OFES staff 1 (Dramatically) Admiral Davies! Captain James T. Goldston is

without.

Davies Without what?

OFES staff 1 No, I mean he is outside. You asked him to report to StarFleet HQ,

remember?

Davies (Furrows brow) Yes, so I did. And on a very important mission

indeed. Have him come in.

Narrator And so, into this saga strides our fearless, gallant, Starfleet captain,

Captain James T. Goldston of the Starship Compromise(Goldston

strides in).

Davies Ah, Captain Goldston. There you are. (looks closely at Goldston) Tell

me, why do you look so sad?

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Goldston It’s terrible! I’ve just found out that my wife has run off with a

tractor salesman.

OFES staff 2 A tractor salesman? How do you know he sells tractors?

Goldston Because she sent me (slowly) a John… Deere ….Letter!

(Pause for audience groans)

Davies Captain Goldston where is you assistant Dale Meade?

Goldston I’m afraid he’s under arrest for arson . He was caught trying to start

a fire! He’s been banished to MIT where he is working as Bruno

Coppi's helper on the IGNORATOR project.

Davies Now Captain Goldston – I have a very distasteful mission for you

to perform

Goldston (grimaces) You mean — you want Princeton to take over the

research in Magnetized Target Fusion ?

Davies No, even worse than that! (Then, behind her hand) [ Although you

can do that too if you want to!] No, I have the most important task

you will ever have to perform…… (pauses and sighs) . I need you to

undertake a task so dangerous, so hazardous, so perilous, that even

your very budget may be in jeopardy

Goldston Gosh! What do I have to do?

Davies I need you to take the Starship Compromise and make an alliance

with the Klingon Empire!

DARTHCAMBELL

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Goldston (Recoils theatrically) Make an alliance with the Klingon Empire! Not

the Inertial Fusion Energy Program and its darstardly leader, Darth

Campbell?

Davies Yes! The IFE Program and Darth Campbell

All (All gasp, looked shocked) The IFE program! Darth Campbell!

Narrator At this terrible news, Captain Goldston tore his hair…. Then he

stamped on his rabbit

Goldston Very well, If I must then…. (pauses)…….No wait! I have a solution

to our predicament. Something that will make it unnecessary to

form an alliance with the IFE Klingons!

Davies (Face lights up) You have? You have? What can it possibly be?

(All look ecstatic)

Goldston (dramatically, building to a crescendo) Yes! I have some very exciting

news for you all! At Princeton we’ve discovered a new fusion

concept. A brand new initiative! Something that will solve all the

problems that the tokamak has brought upon us. Something that

will inject new lifeblood into the fusion program. Something that

will make electricity too cheap to meter!

Davies Wonderful! Wonderful! What is it? (Looks stern, wags finger) It had

better not be a stellarator!

Goldston Don’t worry Admiral Davies – All you have to do is give Princeton

a large funding increase to build a large WASTE.

Davies ( looks puzzled) A WASTE?

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Goldston Yes a WASTE, a wall stabilized toroidal experiment

Davies (still looking puzzled) Ah yes! Based on what concept?

Goldston The quasi spherical tandem mirror machine

Davies I thought you were considering a quasi spherical RFP

Goldston We were and we reviewed some early experiments. But when we

compared some of the later beta data from Zeta with the beta data

from eta-beta, Prager convinced us that the experiment was best

carried out at University of Wisconsin

Davies (thinks then shakes her head) No -- my mind is made up. You will

take the Starship Compromise to Livermore and you will make an

alliance with the Klingon IFE Empire.

Goldston Livermore? Great! (smiles at audience) We had enough gags at

Princeton’s expense. Now it’s time to beat up on Livermore!

OFES staff 2 There’s still a problem Admiral Davies. Even if we make this

alliance, it’s not clear that either MFE or IFE will actually work. We

need a fusion concept that will actually work

Davies Hmm – you’re right (thinks for a moment). I know! Captain Goldston

– on your way to Livermore, I want you to stop off in Victorian

London and consult with Sherlock Holmes, the great detective. He

knows the answer to everything. Ask him about fusion and how to

make it work.

OFE staff 1 Sherlock Holmes? But this is the year 2999 and he lived in 1899 .

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Davies No problem. We’ll use MIT’s ICC proposal for the time machine.

Then you can go back in time and visit Sherlock Holmes on the

way to Livermore ( conspiratorial aside to Goldston) And of course,

you can build the time machine at Princeton!

Goldston (plaintively) Hey! I thought we were going to pick on Livermore

from now on!

Blanken (scrutinizing time machine proposal). But there’s a problem, Admiral

Davies. According to the MIT proposal, the time machine appears

to get its power from a nuclear weapon. It needs a hydrogen bomb

as its energy source.

Davies A hydrogen bomb? (looks dismayed) But the fusion program is an

unclassified program. And we don’t have security clearances. So

where can we get the plans for a nuclear weapon without security

clearances? (Pauses and thinks. All OFES look puzzled and appear to be

thinking)

Ah I know! All you have to do is open up the Los Alamos home

page and click on “top secrets”

And so Captain Goldston, I need you to (dramatically, pauses for

effect) …. to boldly go where no man has gone before!

Roberts (interrupts) Excuse me , you can’t say that

Davies Ah, Mike Roberts, our departmental lawyer. What’s the problem?

Roberts You can’t say “To Boldly Go”.

Davies Why not?

Roberts It’s a split infinitive. You must say “To go Boldly”

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Davies Oh dear! (pauses and thinks) To go boldly? To boldly go? To go

boldly? To boldly go?….hmmm….I can’t decide which one to use.

(turns to others) So loyal OFES staff -- what do we always do in the

office when we can’t decide what to do?

(All smile and nod knowingly)

Davies Right! We’ll ask John Sheffield to commission a FESAC panel!

* * * * *

SCENE 2:221B Baker Street

(Sherlock Holmes' Flat)

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Scene 2 221B Baker Street – Sherlock Holmes’ Flat

[Dramatis personae Scene 2: Narrator, Sherlock Holmes, Dr. Watson, housekeeper,

Captain James T. Goldston]

Narrator Having managed to easily procure the design of the W-88 warhead

from Los Alamos, Princeton get the job (of course) of building the

time machine and were able to transport the Starship Compromise

back to the past.

And so, we find ourselves in Victorian London in 1899. Fusion is

just 53 years away (1952 remember!). The scene is 221B Baker St

and we find the great detective, Sherlock Holmes, peering through

the window into the street below. His companion, Dr Watson, is

hard at work on the Times crossword puzzle.

Holmes Watson! I say Watson, a starship from the future has just landed in

the street!

Watson (irritably) Don’t bother me now Holmes, I’m trying to do this

damned crossword puzzle.

Holmes A crossword puzzle? It’s elementary my dear Watson. It’s all

elementary.

Watson Elementary? The Times crossword? How can you say that?

Holmes The answers to all crossword puzzles are elementary my dear

Watson. I’ll show you. Just give me the clues.

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Watson Very well, Holmes. Try this one, Fifteen Down “The school you

attend from grades one through seven, before going to junior high”

Ten letters

Holmes Elementary, my dear Watson!

Watson Elementary! Of course! …..Okay, try this one. Ten across “A

medical term pertaining to the digestive system and gut.” Ten

letters.

Holmes Alimentary , my dear Watson!

Watson Alimentary! Of Course! Right! Try this one, twenty-one down “A

type of citrus tree bearing bitter yellow fruit” Three words.

Holmes A lemon tree , my dear Watson!

Housekeeper (High pitched Cockney accent) Excuse me Mr ‘Olmes, a Captain

James T Goldston from the Starship Compromise is without.

Holmes Without what, Mrs Hudson?

Housekeeper No I mean he’s here to consult with you. I’ll show him in.

Narrator And so, in strode our gallant Captain Goldston. He found Sherlock

Holmes sitting in the fireplace.

Goldston I see you’re sitting in the fireplace. No wonder you are known as

the grate detective (pause for groans) I am from the future from the

year 2999

Holmes Aha! And have you discovered the secret of fusion?

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Goldston No. But we’re only 30 years away. And now, Mr Holmes, we need

your help. We need to know how to save the fusion program

Holmes Save the fusion program? Captain Goldston, the answer is

elementary. You must convert the fusion program from an energy

program to an art program

Goldston Art program? You mean a science program!

Holmes No, I mean an art program

Goldston (Suspiciously) What kind of art program?

Holmes Still life!

Watson My God Holmes! You mean there’s still life in the fusion program?

Goldston An art program eh? (pauses and considers, then brightens) All right

then. As long as Princeton gets to paint all the pictures!

* * * * *

SCENE 3:The Bridge of the Starship

COMPROMISE

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Scene 3 The Bridge of the Starship Compromise

[Dramatis personae Scene 3: Narrator, Goldston, Spock, McCoy,

Scotty, Lt. Ahura]

Narrator Aboard the bridge of the Starship Compromise on route to the

FESAC Meeting at Livermore.

Stardate 2999.10. Captain Goldston is writing in his log.

McCoy Writing in his log? Why isn’t he writing in his cabin?

Narrator He is. It’s a log cabin . Before setting out, the crew had breakfasted

on a diet of radishes, curry, chili and baked beans, and so the

Starship Compromise set sail with a fair wind behind it. Suddenly

the communications Officer, the beautiful Lieutenant Ahura,

receives a message.

Ahura Captain Goldston! We’ve received a sub-space message from

General Atomics down in San Diego. They have wonderful news!

Goldston Read it out to us

Ahura General Atomics have found a cure for tokamak disruptions.

McCoy They’ve cured tokamak disruptions? Wonderful! How?

Ahura (reading message) They’ve discovered they can stiffen the magnetic

field lines in DIII-D

Goldston Stiffen the field lines? How?

Ahura By injecting pellets

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McCoy Pellets of what?

Ahura Viagra!

(pause for groans)

Spock Viagra! Wonderful! So the tokamak program has been saved?

Ahura Unfortunately not. It says here that thieves have stolen their whole

supply of Viagra.

Spock What? Their viagra stolen?

Ahura Yes -- The San Diego police are looking for a gang of hardened

criminals

(pause for groans)

Ahura Yes! Not only that. All of GA’s supplies of castor oil and X-Lax

have been stolen too.

McCoy No!

Ahura Yes -- The San Diego police are also looking for a gang of criminals

on the run.

Narrator Suddenly, in rushed Scotty, the Engineering Officer. He was in

charge of the Hoffman ion thrusters based on the field-reversed-

configuration. As we all know, the FRC makes an ideal propulsion

system as the system is so leaky. The problem is that the plasma

spews out equally in all directions. Consequently, the FRC

program never goes anywhere.

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Scotty (in an anguished Scottish accent) Captain, Captain - the FRC reactor

is going to blow any minute! I cannae hold her much longer.

Goldston Don’t worry Scotty. It won’t blow. The FRC is a very attractive

reactor.

Narrator Suddenly Doctor McCoy spots something on the scanner.

McCoy Captain! The sensors have picked a very small, compact object. It’s

very hot and intensely radioactive. Is it a neutron star?

Goldston Spock -- what is it?

Spock Hot and intensely radioactive? It must be the center post from one

of Martin Peng’s spherical tori reactors!

Goldston Al right! All right! I’ve had enough of this. That’s enough jokes at

Princeton’s expense! We’ve been doing this bloody skit for 20

minutes now and we still haven’t had a dig at Livermore. You

know – that California lab that has achieved inertial confinement in

both its laser fusion program and its mirror program

Narrator Okay, okay. Very well…… Hey, I know! Lieutenant Ahura here

can tell us all about Livermore. She’s married to someone from

Livermore.

McCoy So you’re husband is a Livermoron eh? Good marriage is it?

Ahura Well yes, but I don’t know what he does there. He won’t tell me

since I don’t have a Q-clearance and sigma levels 1,2,11, and 69.

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Goldston I know just how you feel. When I tell Livermore:-- “I’ll show you

my physics if you show me yours”, they always say the same thing

– No Q, no sigma, no need-to-know -- no secrets!

Narrator And so Captain Goldston had to get all his secrets from Los

Alamos.

* * * * *

SCENE 4:243,000,000th FESAC Meeting

(at Livermore)

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Scene 4 The 243,000,000 th FESAC Meeting at Livermore

[Dramatis personae Scene 4: Narrator, John Sheffield, a Witch from the Planet Zod, Dick

Siemon, MFE Theory Program Leader, James T. Goldston, Mike Campbell]

Narrator John Sheffield convenes the 243,000,000th FESAC meeting at LLNL

which, as everyone knows, stands for “Lasers, Lasers and Nothing

but Lasers”. FESAC’s main job is to assess the difference between

“To Boldly Go” and “To Go Boldly”, a task that should take at least

several months of meetings. Of course, it won’t actually get to

decide anything, rather it will just list the opportunities that can be

had with split infinitives.

The FESAC Panel have just toured the National Ignition Facility

and are impressed that ignition on NIF is now just thirty years

away!

Present at the Livermore FESAC meeting are the normal fusion

community rabble and a strange, intergalactic traveler -- a witch

from the planet Zod, and she can foretell the future .

John Sheffield opens the meeting with his impeccable British accent

(Don Batchelor is playing this part!)..

Sheffield Ladies and gentlemen, Welcome to the two-hundred-and-forty-

three-millionth meeting of FESAC. I would like to say it gives me

great pleasure . . . (pauses and smiles) . . . and it always has! (pause)

And no, I don’t know where all the Viagra tablets from GA have

gone.

(Looks stern) I must say that by losing all those Viagra tablets, GA

have really let the fusion program down !

Narrator John Sheffield turns to the Witch from the Planet Zod.

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Witch (very deliberately) Yes! I can!

Sheffield I understand you can foretell the future?

(pause as Sheffield – and audience -- consider this rather sophisticated joke)

Witch The quasi antisymmetric toroidal helical omnigenous ITER

stellarator

Sheffield What concept should Princeton abandon? …. (thinks for a second)…

Wait a minute. Hold on. This foretelling the future is all very well

but it makes it very hard for the audience to understand. (points to

audience) They’re not laughing.

Witch But they didn’t laugh at the previous part of the script either!

Sheffield True. But please, from now on, answer the question after I’ve

asked it.

Now, you just said an ITER stellarator. An ITER stellerator eh? It

sounds like the title of a Stephen King novel! (pause)

Now here’s a question of the future. How long will it be before we

have fusion.

Witch Thirty years

Sheffield From now?

Witch From whenever you like. It will always be thirty years.

Sheffield Oh dear. Then you must tell us -- What is the secret of fusion?

Witch The secret of fusion is to sustain your research budgets while fusion

remains 30 years away!

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Sheffield Right. Next on the agenda is Dick Siemon.. Dr Siemon -- I

understand you have brought a working version of your high-yield

MTF target to show us

(Siemon drags in the large traffic cone with W88 marked on it)

Siemon Yes. Guranteed to work! It’s rather high yield and there is a

standoff problem. But the rep rate is only once every 30 minutes!

Sheffield Okay, that’s enough real fusion.

It’s now time to hear from the IFE Theory Program. who are

capable of predicting what’s going to happen before the experiment

is completed. And also the MFE Theory Program who can’t predict

what happened in an experiment even after it has been performed

(Turns to MFE Theory Program Leader) And so tell us MFE Theory

Program – have you discovered anything new in theory

Theory Yes we have made progress of galactic importance in several

critical areas.

Sheffield Can you give us any examples

Theory Certainly

Our new multidimensional finite element code, MH12D, has shown

that within 2% a round plasma is circular

(pause)

Another spectacular contribution in ICF has shown that in 85% of

the LASTHOPE mega simulation runs, the pellet implodes inwards

(pause)

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Also, in our new full wave, 3-D, RF heating code, ZAPEM, we have

been able to achieve a maximum efficiency of 87% in power

absorption by an adjacent antenna

(pause)

Most amazingly we have developed a 3-D, multifluid, gyrokinetic,

MHD, Fokker-Planck code, including a Wall Street analysis

package,. This code, NIMBICILE has conclusively demonstrated in

over 50% of the runs, - all right 3 out of 5 runs,- that

microinstability-driven turbulence causes energy to be transported

in the outward direction.

(pause)

Finally, our new RF heating code, IHEAT, has shown that ICH in

the presence of ITG contributes to the formation of ITB’s even in the

absence if IBW. I be damned if I know what that means.

Sheffield Okay, Okay. That’s enough theory for this millennium. (turns to

Goldston) Now, Captain Goldston. What would you like to hear

next on the agenda?

Goldston I’d like to hear more jokes at the expense of IFE -- there’s been

enough digs at MFE in this skit. It’s IFE’s turn now.

Sheffield I agree. We’ll let the leader of the Klingons -- Darth Campbell – tell

us about inertial con fusion. …. Dr Campbell?…..Er Dr Campbell?

Are you ther

(Campbell wanders in after a minute or two oblivious to the situation and carrying on an

animated conversion on his cell phone)

Campbell Ah, the FESAC meeting! Was that today? Right, I’d like to explain

to Captain Gladstone here about the new national collaborative

fusion program. Here’s how it works Captain Gudstein. You give

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me half the MFE budget and I’ll make Steve Bodner an offer he

can’t refuse!

(pauses)

See, Captain Goldbucket – it’s already worked! He’s gone. Now

where’s my half of the budget?

Goldstein (grimly) Just tell us how ICF works.

Campbell Well ICF is quite simple. My mother explained it all to me. You

take a B-B pellet and a beer can (holds up a golf ball and the beer can)

Everyone Yes?

Campbell And you put the B-B at the center at the center of a beer can.

Everyone Yes?

Campbell And then you take more power than is generated in the whole of

the United States.

Everyone Yes?

Campbell And you stuff all the power into the beer can

Everyone Yes?

Campbell And then you cover your ears and run

Everyone Yes, yes? And? And?

Campbell And that’s it.

Everyone That’s it?

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Campbell Yes. Wonderful isn’t it! (Then peers suspiciously at the golf ball)

Wait a minute! Look at the dimples on this capsule! Look at the

terrible surface finish! It’s clearly one of Ken Schultz’s targets!

Sheffield And now Darth Campbell, it seems that FESAC will be unable to

decide between “To Boldly Go” and “To Go Boldly” -- other than

to point out the wonderful opportunities, of course!. So, do you

have any suggestions?

Campbell Of course. The IFE program has all the answers!

Sheffield Ah-ha! So tell us

Campbell I have the very process for you. A process that will enable you to all

come to consensus on this issue.

Goldston A process to come to consensus on “To Boldly Go”? Surely you

can’t mean …..

Campbell Yes! You need to convene….. (pause) ….a Snowmass meeting!

All (together) A Snowmass meeting! Oh no! Anything but that!

( curtain – and rotten fruit )