GRITdeveloping grit: delaying gratification

My name is Jessica.My plan is to attend Ivy Tech Community College. I want to make a difference in the lives of others and give back to my community.

Digging In

Grit. It’s more than the sand in your shoe while on summer vacation. It’s more than that breakfast goop your aunt from Alabama is crazy about. Grit may be the key to success in college and beyond.

When we talk about the traits of successful people, grit is usually in the mix, whether it is called specifically by that name or not. In reality, grit represents the meeting of three different character traits: self-discipline, perseverance and passion. Over the course of the Student Toolkit, we will explore each of these in depth, but before the new school year begins and you officially assume the title of “sophomore” we wanted to take a moment to explore the ideas of self-discipline and delayed gratification.

In life, it is not uncommon to find yourself in a situation where you have to decide between satisfying your current desires or fulfilling your future needs or goals.

There are two factors at play with delaying gratification: a temptation that comes at a cost and a reward for avoiding the temptation. Many researchers note the ability to forego initial temptation in favor of an even better reward to be a hallmark of successful people.

Watch Joachim de Posada’s video at: intoolkit.com/donteatthemarshmallowvideo

In his TED Talk, author Joachim de Posada talks about this idea and references a famous Stanford University psychological experiment that involves 4-year-olds and marshmallows. Take a moment to watch the video.

QUICK TASK>>

QUICK TASK

GRITdeveloping grit: delaying gratification

WHAT ARE YOUR TEMPTATIONS? WHAT ARE THOSE THINGS THAT CAN PULL YOU AWAY FROM IMPORTANT THINGS? While at your age marshmallows might not be as irresistible as it was to those four year olds, we all certainly have things that we love just as much. Knowing what your temptations are is the first step in fighting against them.

Complete the Temptation Evaluation Form below.QUICK TASK

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ConnectionsIn this activity, you are going to think about these temptations and list at least four that you encounter on a regular basis. Also, list the activity that the temptations threaten to pull you away from. For example:

My temptation: late night marathons of online gaming

Activity threatened by temptation: getting necessary amount of sleep

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temptation #1 activity threatened by temptation

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temptation #2 activity threatened by temptation

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temptation #3 activity threatened by temptation

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temptation #4 activity threatened by temptation

The Big PictureNow that we’ve taken a look at your temptations, it’s time to look at the rewards that await you in the future should you succeed in avoiding those temptations. Every potentially problematic temptation has a reward, but sometimes it’s very difficult to see. Often it exists in a future so distant that it’s difficult to imagine.

On the Rewards Evaluation Form below, copy your same list of temptations from the previous exercise. For each of your temptations, you are now going to list a potential re-ward.

As you complete this exercise, it will be possible to go in two wildly different directions. First of all, you could look at it with way too short of a timeline in mind. For example, if my temptation is late night gaming, my potential reward could be feeling well rested and less grumpy on my ride to school. While this may be true, it ignores the full potential of avoiding this temptation. Likewise, you could easily find yourself in the situation where the butterfly flaps its wings and causes a typhoon on the other side of the globe. In this extreme example, you might say that by avoiding late night gaming you could achieve your goal of becoming the CEO of a Fortune 500 company. A better plan would be to find your rewards somewhere between these two. A more reasonable example might be:

My temptation: late night marathons of online gaming.

My reward for avoiding this temptation: improved grades in Algebra.

___________________ ________________________temptation #1 reward for avoiding temptation ___________________ ________________________temptation #2 reward for avoiding temptation

___________________ ________________________temptation #3 reward for avoiding temptation

___________________ ________________________temptation #4 reward for avoiding temptation

GRIT

developing grit: delaying gratification

>>Complete the Temptation Evaluation Form below.QUICK TASK

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temptation #1 activity threatened by temptation

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temptation #2 activity threatened by temptation

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temptation #3 activity threatened by temptation

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temptation #4 activity threatened by temptation

GRITdeveloping grit: delaying gratification

Into ActionThink back to the marshmallow video. What were some of the things you saw the children do while they were attempting to resist eating the marshmallow? They rolled it. They poked it. They sniffed it. They licked it. Even at a very young age, these children were showing strategies to avoid giving into the temptation at hand. While they were too young to be aware of what they were doing, for many of them having strategies in place was very helpful.

Similarly, it would be smart for you to think about some strategies that you can rely on in situations where you may encounter the temptations you have outlined. Some common avoidance strategies include those listed on the right.

Take a moment to review the list of strategies on the right, and then list your temptations one last time and match each one with a strategy that you feel would help you avoid that temptation. Don’t worry about using all of the strategies. Give thought to which strategy would work best to help you resist temptation. If each is different or if they are all the same, it doesn’t matter. Circle each strategy that is best for you.

>> Make It YoursYou don’t have to go this alone. Think of someone you could count on to get you back on track. Make sure it’s a person who you trust to direct you back toward your commitment.

Speak to this person. Ask if they would be willing to support you in keeping on track. Write this person’s name and phone number on the Temptation Consultation Contact Card to the right. Cut it out and keep it with you at all times.

List your temptations below and select the best strategy to help you avoid it.

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________________________ Av Ds C St Cn ________________________ Av Ds C St Cntemptation #1 best strategy temptation #2 best strategy

________________________ Av Ds C St Cn ________________________ Av Ds C St Cntemptation #3 best strategy temptation #4 best strategy

>>Strategies for Dealing with

Temptation

Avoidance (Av)putting the temptation out of your mind

Distraction (Ds)focus elsewhere until temptation passes

Commitment (C)holding yourself to opposing expectations

Short-term Rewards (St)celebrating successes on a micro-scale

Consequences (Cn)punishment for giving in to temptation

Fill in and Cut Out the Temptation Consultation Card.

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