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Happiness

Date post: 05-Dec-2014
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I wrote this article about how I achieved happiness in my life.
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HAPPINESS happiness BY: JENNIFER FLORES What is happiness? Does happiness change over time? Lately, a lot of people have been telling me “Jenn, you look really happy”. Although this may not seem like a weird comment to some - to me it feels refreshing. It felt weird, in a good way. What is this feeling supposed to mean? Is this the happiest I’ll ever be? Will this happiness just turn out to be another disappointment? I was so uneasy with letting happiness take its place, because of so many disappointments in my life. Then I quickly shook myself, and said “just let it be”. It felt great. I actually felt proud of myself. I am 27 years old now. I am in my graduating year in University, finishing my Bachelor of Commerce Degree, majoring in Marketing. A lot of my friends my age have graduated years ago - but not me. For a long time I felt bad, because I wasn’t at the same level as everyone. I felt like I was supposed to follow the status quo. By now, I should have been married, bought 10 key tips to happiness 1. Make mistakes 2. Learn from mistakes 3. Get to know yourself 4. Make the right decisions & goals 5. Be conscious & proactive 6. Stay committed 7. Follow your gut instincts 8. Embrace opportunities & change 9. Grow 10. Love yourself
Transcript
Page 1: Happiness

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HAPPINESS

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BY: JENNIFER FLORES

What is happiness? Does happiness change over time?

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Lately, a lot of people have been telling me “Jenn, you look really happy”. Although this may not seem like a weird comment to some - to me it feels refreshing. It felt weird, in a good way. What is this feeling supposed to mean? Is this the happiest I’ll ever be? Will this

happiness just turn out to be another disappointment? I was so uneasy with letting happiness take its place, because of so many disappointments in my life. Then I quickly shook myself, and said “just let it be”. It felt great. I actually felt proud of myself.

I am 27 years old now. I am in my graduating year in University, finishing my Bachelor of Commerce Degree, majoring in Marketing. A lot of my friends my age have graduated years ago - but not me. For a long time I felt bad, because I

wasn’t at the same level as everyone. I felt like I was supposed to follow the status quo. By now, I should have been married, bought

10 key tips to happiness1. Make mistakes2. Learn from mistakes3. Get to know yourself4. Make the right decisions & goals5. Be conscious & proactive6. Stay committed7. Follow your gut instincts8. Embrace opportunities & change9. Grow10. Love yourself

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Page 2: Happiness

a house, and started my own family. At least that was my dream when I was 19 years old... One thing I learned in life: your plans are never concrete - never set in stone. At the time that everyone else was graduating University, I was singing in Switzerland and New York City. I had released songs on iTunes, met VIPs and got a lot of experience in the music industry. I didn’t lose out on anything. I had no regrets.

I’m here to share the lessons I’ve learned in my life. Not everyone has the same understanding of life or path, but if you do feel like you’re a little bit lost, then maybe my experiences can help you clarify your own questions about yourself.

1. Make MistakesYou’re probably asking yourself,

“make mistakes?” I don’t mean to intentionally do the wrong thing. What I mean by make mistakes, is allow yourself to accept mistakes you’ve made. It’s a part of life. My parents raised me in a way, where I was supposed to be their perfect daughter. I had a lot of pressure never to disappoint them. It’s normal in life to make mistakes, but I only learned that through life - not by what I was taught. Although my parents had high aspirations for me, I was always afraid to let them down. I was way too hard on myself. Sometimes, I felt ashamed to make mistakes, that it consumed me. My confidence started to slip, and I always felt bad. Not being able to embrace and accept my mistakes, led me to seldom trust my gut. Consequently, this led me to make poor decisions.

2. Learn From Mistakes It’s so important to learn from

mistakes. Even if it takes a few times to learn. The important thing is, to wake up and reflect on why some mistakes keep happening. Is it because you’re comfortable with the type of behavior you are currently exuding? Are you afraid of change? Those questions always came into my mind, when I felt that I still could not find happiness.

3. Get To Know YourselfIt’s always good to have “alone

time”. Being single, spending time at home alone, traveling by yourself, taking a walk by yourself, reading a book or even watching a movie by yourself. One thing that I learned to do by myself was mediate. I took time out to just reflect on me. What can I improve about myself? How will I improve myself? What do I love to do? What do I hate? What are my goals (short-term and long-term)? Who are my circle of friends and are they the type of people I want to be around? What am I good at? What am I not good at? Etc... By giving yourself time to reflect, you give yourself assurance, awareness and love. You create standards, and a relationship with yourself. You know yourself best out of anyone out there - so use that to your advantage. Once you are capable of understanding what you need, you’ll be able to achieve anything you want, whether it be a job, business, relationship, family - you name it. The most important thing though, is to always be yourself. It doesn’t matter what people think about you, because they’re not living your life. Criticism should be constructive, and you should accept it. Judgment should only be done by God or yourself. No one else should judge

you, even if they feel obliged to do so - and if they do, don’t mind them.

4. Decisions & GoalsWhen you know exactly who

you are, where you come from and what you want, it’s easy to make good decisions and goals. After I had taken time out to be single, and reflect, I knew what my goals were. In 2011, I moved back to Montreal from Toronto after a rough break up. Even though I was sad, and emotional, I didn’t forget what my goals were when I was to arrive in Montreal again. A week before I moved back, I was at work in Toronto emailing Concordia University saying I’d like to come back again. I got accepted again. I also emailed a few companies to find a job, so I wasn’t jobless when I got back home. I got hired right away. When I came home, I had nothing to worry about. I felt accomplished and focused. I achieved my goals. Now, my goal is to finish University. I’ve been doing so ever since I got back in August 2011. I achieved good grades and now I’m about to graduate. It feels amazing!

5. Be Conscious & ProactiveDecisions and goals are one

thing, but to actually achieve them is another. This requires discipline. In order to be disciplined you need to be conscious of what you’re doing, and be proactive - take action. There’s a lot of people out there who just talk a lot about what they want to achieve, but they don’t actually do anything about it. Why? One reason is because they’re afraid to try, and other reasons could be because they are afraid of change or they are just plain lazy.

10 Key Tips to Happiness

Page 3: Happiness

In order to make a difference in your life, you need to take action. Nothing happens when you just sit back and do nothing. Being proactive also helps you in finding your purpose in life. You start to understand the “why” behind everything you do.

6. Stay CommittedOne of my own pet peeves is

when someone doesn’t follow through with what they said they were going to go. To me, commitment is important. If I can stay committed to what I said I was going to do, it gives me satisfaction of knowing I’m determined to do something. Exuding this, also shows people around you they can take you seriously (with work, relationships and life all together). It is always a good feeling to trust yourself, and feel trusted by others.

7. Follow Your Gut InstinctsThis is one thing I’ve always had

a hard time doing. Because of all the things I’ve been through in my life, and mistakes I’ve made, I started to not trust my gut. These days I find it a lot easier too, because I’ve learned to make the right choices without second guessing myself. It’s

achieved at the stage when you get to really know yourself.

8. Embrace Opportunities & Change

This is one of my favorite points about happiness. As humans, we were meant to evolve. Therefore, it is important that we embrace opportunities and change. Some people are afraid to take an opportunity, because they are afraid of the unknown. They often tend to ask themselves “Should I be doing this? What if the income isn’t great?” Well I guess you wouldn’t know unless you tried right? Life is about taking some risks, or else you’ll never see outside of your box. I know for sure, that everyone has changed since they were younger. For some it happens quickly, and others are still stuck in one place. That’s the beauty of life, it never stays the same.

9. GrowMy standards and needs now,

were different from when they were when I was 16. My goals, and experiences have changed. In order to live a fulfilled life, you have to ride the waves - the good and the

bad. Life wouldn’t be fun, if it was always monotonous. The beauty of growth, is like watching a seed you planted, grow into a tasty fruit. I remember the first time I planted a seed in my grandparents garden when I was little. I was so excited to watch it grow. That’s exactly how we should feel about our life. Be excited for it to grow and be fruitful.

10. Love YourselfFinally, something a lot of us

tend to forget to do - love ourselves. More often than not, a lot of us stress ourselves out for nothing. We get down on ourselves and frustrated, because something doesn’t work out properly. Sometimes when bad things happen to us, we lose our self-esteem and self-confidence. To be able to love someone else, you also need to love yourself. The most important lesson in my life, is that no one else is able to help myself back up but me. The main thing that I love about myself? I never, ever gave up on myself, and never gave up hope. No matter how bad life was sometimes, I was able to get right back up and keep smiling. For that, I am grateful and blessed.

Page 4: Happiness

How do I know I’m happy?Well, after going over all the 10 key tips with you, I know I am happy,

because I’ve been through all 10 tips. I’m happy in my life right now, because I’ve accomplished so much. My greatest passion (singing) is something I always do, and never stop doing. I enjoy it thoroughly. I love to travel, and I’ve been to so many places around the world and plan on seeing more. I constantly give myself objectives, to stay motivated and driven. I am finally really comfortable in my own skin.

Moreover, I have a great support system - great family, friends, and a significant other. They are all reasons why I am thankful to live another day, because they all make my life worth living too.

My Ultimate AchievementMy ultimate achievement thus far, is my strength and adversity - making

myself proud of who I am. My mother always taught me to be resilient, classy, respectful and I admire her as a strong woman. She’s taught me to be very independent, and to not rely on anyone else to do things for me. My late grandmother always taught me that when there is a will, there is a way. Ever since she instilled that in me when I was a child, I told myself to never give up. I relied on my own will, and God’s will. Even if I’m not a religious person, I do thank God for all the blessings he’s given me in my life.

I’ve achieved so much, in a short amount of time. I found happiness because I grew up, and realized exactly who I am, what I need, and what I want as a woman.

Happiness, to me is doing the right thing by you, and by other people. Have a good heart, and be compassionate. Don’t cheat yourself, or cheat others out selfishness. Be strong and courageous. Happiness is a choice. You can make it or break it, so it’s up to you to decide.

Be happy. :)


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