Healthy Relationships
Objectives:To understand components of a healthy relationshipState what is important to YOU in a relationship – values and opinionsArticulate concrete ways to improve upon negative situations and improve relationships.
Relationships
When I am with someone else I need to feel: ________________.A relationship is a bond or connection you have with other people.
Evaluating a Relationship Activity
The purpose of this activity is to heighten awareness of what constitutes a good relationship and to help you learn how to evaluate your own relationships.
Use this worksheet to evaluate any type of relationship including a romantic relationship, friendship, or family relationship.
Think of a relationship, past or present, that is important to you and use this worksheet to evaluate that relationship.
Scoring Your Worksheet
One point for each “yes” response to questions 2, 3, 4, 6, 9, 11, 12, 13 and 14.
One point for each “no” response to questions 1, 5, 7, 8 and 10.
What does the score mean?
1-3: There are few constructive elements in this
relationship. You may want to think about your reasons for continuing the relationship, or work toward improving it.
4-6: This relationship has problems that might be
resolved by working on honesty and communication.
7-10: There is the basis for a good relationship.
Focus on the positive elements and work on improving the destructive ones.
10-14: You're doing well and have what it takes to
build a successful and satisfying relationship.
Traits of a healthy relationship
Mutual respect Caring Honesty Commitment
Three C’s of healthy relationships
Communication Cooperation Compromise
Codependent Relationships
Codependency – making the relationship more important to you than you are to yourself
Trying to make the relationship work with someone else who’s not trying
Behaviors of codependent people: Low self esteem Fixers People pleasers Fear abandonment
Relationships Healthful
Promotes mutual respect, productivity, and health (physical, emotional, mental and social)
Free of violence, harmful behaviors, and drug use
Harmful Harms self respect, interferes with
productivity and health (physical, emotional, mental, and social)
Includes violence and/or drug abuse, harmful behaviors
Harmful Relationship Profiles People Pleaser
Seeks approval Does anything to be liked Acts like a “doormat”
The Enabler Supports harmful behavior of others Makes excuses for behavior of others Takes over other peoples responsibilities
Harmful Relationship Profiles
The Clinger Needy and dependent Chases and clings Suffocates others
The Fixer Fixes other peoples problems Quick to give advice Takes over other peoples
responsibilities
Harmful Relationship Profiles The Distancer
Emotionally unavailable Avoids sharing feelings Keeps people at an arms length away
The Controller Possessive, jealous, and domineering Does not respect the will of others Demands one way
The Center Self centered Talks but does not listen Ignores the needs of others
Harmful Relationship Profiles
The Abuser Abusive Puts down others Threatens and harms others
The Liar Does not tell the truth Builds relationships on lies Manipulates others into responses they want
The Promise Breaker Unreliable Makes plans and cancels them Agrees to change behavior and does not do so
