Volume 5.3 — October 2014 ® How to Raise a Philanthropist By Jim Daly President Focus on the Family A recent edition of the Wall Street Journal featured an interesting essay on how to teach children about the importance of charitable giving. According to the author of the piece, some notably wealthy parents are growing concerned that their kids, who stand to one day inherit their family’s sizable fortunes, are unprepared to be multi-millionaires. Imagine having such worries! All kidding aside, there is a telling twist in this story. Afraid their kids will either lose the incentive to work or recklessly manage the assets, high-net-worth families are turning to philanthropy advisors for advice on how to properly instill in their child a spirit of charity. But curiously, there was no reference in the piece to God or the influence He has on charitable giving in general and people’s generosity in particular. From my perspective, and that of the few philanthropy advisors with which I’m friendly, talking with a child about giving without mentioning God is like talking about nutrition without mentioning the health benefits of a balanced diet. There are over 800 references to money in the Bible, and for good reason. The pursuit of money, wrote Paul, is the root of all kinds of evil. But if we’re to properly teach and instill in our children an understanding and passion for sacrificial giving, we can’t simply teach them a formula by which to measure a charity’s worthiness. Rather, we must help them look inward, examine their own heart and help them come to see giving as God sees it. We want to give to others because it was the Lord who first gave to us. After all, “God loves a cheerful giver” (2 Corinthians 9:7, ESV). In both the Old and New Testaments, we’re encouraged to pray for opportunities to witness in His name, and when we find a need, we’re to simply do all that we can to try to fill it. Sometimes that help comes in the form of a financial gift, other times it comes in the form of our time, talents and energy. In every instance, our hearts are drawn by the Holy What’s Inside What Do You Get Someone Who Has Everything? What One Family Chose to Do Teaching Our Children Gratitude What’s the Secret? Grateful Giving Multiplied Are Gratefulness and Wisdom Related? Choosing Who To Trust Making a Smart Trustee Decision Continued on next page
Transcript
Volume 5.3 — October 2014
®
How to Raise a Philanthropist By Jim Daly PresidentFocus on the Family
A recent edition of the Wall
Street Journal featured an interesting essay on how to teach children about the importance of charitable giving. According to the author of the piece, some notably wealthy parents are growing concerned that their kids, who stand to one day inherit their family’s sizable fortunes, are unprepared to be multi-millionaires.
Imagine having such worries!
All kidding aside, there is a telling twist in this story. Afraid their kids will either lose the incentive to work or recklessly manage the assets, high-net-worth families are turning to philanthropy advisors for advice
on how to properly instill in their child a spirit of charity.
But curiously, there was no reference in the piece to God or the influence He has on charitable giving in general and people’s generosity in particular. From my perspective, and that of the few philanthropy advisors with which I’m friendly, talking with a child about giving without mentioning God is like talking about nutrition without mentioning the health benefits of a balanced diet.
There are over 800 references to money in the Bible, and for good reason. The pursuit of money, wrote Paul, is the root of all kinds of evil. But if we’re to properly teach and instill in our children an understanding and passion for
sacrificial giving, we can’t simply teach them a formula by which to measure a charity’s worthiness. Rather, we must help them look inward, examine their own heart and help them come to see giving as God sees it.
We want to give to others because it was the Lord who first gave to us. After all, “God loves a cheerful giver” (2 Corinthians 9:7, ESV). In both the Old and New Testaments, we’re encouraged to pray for opportunities to witness in His name, and when we find a need, we’re to simply do all that we can to try to fill it. Sometimes that help comes in the form of a financial gift, other times it comes in the form of our time, talents and energy. In every instance, our hearts are drawn by the Holy
What’s InsideWhat Do You Get Someone Who Has Everything?What One Family Chose to Do
Teaching Our Children Gratitude What’s the Secret?
Grateful Giving MultipliedAre Gratefulness and Wisdom Related?
Choosing Who To Trust Making a Smart Trustee Decision
Continued on next page
Teaching Our Children GratitudeBy Jackson Dunn Director of Marriage Focus on the Family
If you’re like me as a parent, you wish your children would be a little more
grateful for what they have. I give them something, and they either want something else or what I gave them wasn’t enough. Sometimes, I’m tempted to give them the speech my dad gave me when I was young about how so many kids would be very thankful for much less. I have been thinking about this more, though, and there has to be another, better way.
For instructing our children, two common—yet opposing —philosophies apply. One is the “Do as I SAY, not as I DO” approach. The other is the “Caught and Taught” approach. I think these are especially relevant with gratitude because, whether we’re aware of it or not, as parents, we are models for our children. Our words, actions and lives display every day what we believe and value.
The “Do as I SAY, not as I DO” approach hasn’t been terribly effective, so I’m going to throw it out the window. So, let’s use the “Caught and Taught” approach.
In parenting, we have the opportunity to teach our children what we think they should know and do, AND also the opportunity for them to “catch” us doing these things. What if your children didn’t just hear you tell them about the importance of gratitude, but actually saw you giving as an expression of gratitude?
This could be as simple as including your children when you make a decision to give to your church or a local charity. You might allow them to write the check themselves to the charity before you sign it.
As they see us giving in gratitude, they can begin to assimilate the foundational value of gratitude into their young lives. Then, we have a new parenting approach: Do as I SAY and as I DO!
What Do You Get Someone Who Has Everything?By Royce Bervig Senior Gift Planning Officer Focus on the Family
s the giving season approaches, we often ask, “What do you get
someone who has everything?” The reality is that most of us have more than
we need materially. Several weeks ago, I spoke with a couple that shared the new joys they were experiencing from giving to those in need at an increased level. As they pondered, “What can we give our adult children who also have everything?” here’s what they decided to do. For Christmas, they invited their children
to the family home in the mountains for a holiday family retreat. At the retreat, they presented each family with a Giving Fund with a beginning balance and the option for matching any donations.
Perhaps that’s the answer.
How to Raise a Philanthropist, cont.
Spirit’s influence. In the past, I’ve suggested that parents of very young kids can help them manage their money by putting three jars in their room – one for giving, another for saving and the last for spending. I still think that’s a good idea. And don’t forget, the best way to teach our kids about giving is to give – but as you’re giving to
your church or parachurch ministry, don’t forget to share with them the reason why.
Jim Daly is president of Focus on the Family and host of its National Radio Hall of Fame broadcast. He and his wife, Jean, have two sons, Trent and Troy, and live in Colorado Springs.
TECHnICal TIp
Grateful Giving MultipliedBy Jeanne McMainsVice President national Christian Foundation Serving Focus on the Family
In this issue, we’ve read about the joys that come from cultivating grateful hearts.
While gratitude is certainly expressed in a variety of forms, giving is one important way we express our gratefulness to God for the blessings He has entrusted to our care.
Most people agree that working harder and smarter will yield greater results than just working harder would alone. The same can be said of your giving. When gratefulness and wisdom combine to drive your giving, the Kingdom impact multiplies.
With the end of year quickly approaching, here are two ideas to help you give smarter.
Give Stock Instead of Cash – Rather than writing checks this year, consider giving appreciated stock instead. You still enjoy a charitable deduction for the value of the gifted stock, and the charity can sell it without owing capital gains tax. You can then use the cash you were previously going to give to charity to purchase new stock with a new income tax basis.
To learn more:
• Talk with Focus’ stock giving specialist, Debbie Helus, at 1-800-782-8227.
• Watch this short video from our NCF friends: vimeo.com/51412003
• Learn how it’s done at fotf.giftlegacy.com by clicking on the left sidebar “Gifts of Stock” option
Use a Donor Advised Fund – End of year is a frantic time to make your charitable giving decisions. This year, consider making your charitable gifts through a Donor Advised Fund (DAF). With a DAF, you can make your year-end tax-deductible charitable gifts to your own family “giving fund.” Thereafter, you have the joy of recommending checks be sent from your fund to your favorite charities in the timing and in the amounts you want to give. To learn more, watch these short videos:
• What is a Giving Fund - vimeo.com/51412019
• The Giving Fund Experience - vimeo.com/75234044
If you’d like to talk with our gift planning team about ideas for you to grow your giving by using tax-smart strategies, please give us a call at 1-800-782-8227. We look forward to talking with you!
DID YOu KnOW?Baby Boomers (those born between 1946 to 1964) will transfer an estimated $30 trillion in assets in north america. It’s estimated that an average of 10 percent of total wealth in the united States will be changing hands every five years. (Source: Cerulli associates: Cerulli Quantitative update
Choosing Who to TrustBy Terry parker Founder and Chairman Emeritus national Christian Foundation
Fall is here and that means that most of us will enjoy family holiday time.
When our family is together, I sometimes wonder what will the gathering look like when Paula and I are no longer here. Will everyone get along based on the decisions we’ve made in allocating family resources? Will those who we’ve trusted as overseers do as we had hoped? For our family, we’ve used trusts as an estate planning tool, and we’ve chosen to appoint co-trustees to encourage family harmony and establish appropriate oversight.
However, since trusts can serve different purposes in estate planning, the co-trustees selected might be different based upon the intent of the trust. Here are a couple examples: The BYPASS TRUST provides income, and corpus, as necessary for the benefit of your spouse during your spouse’s lifetime, and afterwards. The remainder bypasses their estate to the next generation. In this trust, the spouse cannot have the power to encroach on the trust for their own benefit. Therefore, there needs to be someone serving as the co-trustee along with the spouse to make encroachment decisions and to distribute the corpus of the trust at your spouse’s death. With this trust, I recommend that the co-trustee be someone very close to the spouse because of the sensitivity of the decisions. In any case, I recommend
giving the spouse the power to replace the co-trustee if they should find the need to do so.
The SPENDTHRIFT TRUST is one to provide financially for a beneficiary that is not likely to be able to make good financial decisions on their own. The age of the co-trustees will be important for a trust that is expected to go on for decades. Trustees will make decisions regarding when to use the corpus for a beneficiary, therefore it’s wise to have trustees who know the family.
With most trusts, there will be a current beneficiary and one or more remainder beneficiaries. A significant issue for the trustees will be balancing the desire for the trust to generate current income and growing the corpus for the remainder beneficiaries. I find that many people want to name a bank as one of the co-trustees, since many banks have years of experience with these issues. However, I have observed that conflicts arise regarding the bank’s fees, its investment performance and the bank’s decisions regarding distributing current income at the expense of the remainder beneficiaries. These issues don’t have to be unpleasant surprises for the next generation if care is taken to discuss these concerns with potential banks.
We are seeking to make wise choices today, so that the family gatherings in the future will build on our family legacy. In the next issue I will talk about some of the innovative ways that you can “guide from the grave” to the benefit of all concerned in your trusts.
Free Offer Share the Joy of Giving! As the family gathers this fall, watch heartwarming stories of generosity together at ilikegiving.com, like the story of Evelyn, who at 98 regained her drivers license so that she could give. Caution! These stories are addictive!
Call Focus on the Family’s Gift and Estate planning Team at 1-800-782-8227 to schedule a complimentary consultation.
