T M i N B W S f A W E R O F I M P E R I A L C O L L E G E

7

K E I T M I L L E R I S R E F U S E D V I S A NOW

LAST WEEK SAW A HAPPT BSDING TO WHAT HOST HE OWE OP THE MOST SENSATIONAL AMD MYSTERIOUS EVENTS AT I.C. FOE SOME TEARS. KEITH MILLER, THE PRESIDENT OF GUILDS UNION LAST TEAR AND A PRIME MOTER IN THE FOUNDING OF THE EXPLORATION BOARD, WAS THE SUBJECT OF DISCUSSION H THE BOOSE OF COMMONS.

Daring the debate i t was announced that the ban on M i l l e r , imposed by the Pakistan Government,! had been withdrawn. A l l I.C. , knowing of the tremendous untiring effort he has made i n get­ting the forthcoming expedition to the Himalayas on a sound footing, w i l l rejoice at this news. There can be l i t t l e doubt, however, that some of the facts behind the story are truly amazing.

I t appears that news of M i l l a r having been banned was received some weeks ago by the senior members of the Exploration Board. Some attempt was made to have the decision reversed, both obviously meeting with some d i f f i c u l t i e s , they reached a conclusion that this was impossible. I t i s noteworthy at this stage to realize that during this period, neither student members, nor any I.C. Union Officer, nor EVEN MILLER aU-SELF, were informed. Eventually the Exploration Board informed Keith that, much as they natural­l y sympathised with him, there was l i t t l e or \ nothing he could do about i t . In an endeavour to keep the whole event quiet, and so that no-one need ever know, i t was even suggested that Keith should resign because of " i l l - h e a l t h " . Evan without knowing why Keith had been banned, the Board advised him to accept the decision with as l i t t l e fuss as possible.

For those who know Keith personally, i t w i l l be no surprise to hear that he did not take too kindly to this treatment. He v i s i t e d the M.P. for Blackburn (his home town), Mrs. Barbara Castle, and the High Commissioner for Pakistan i n England. He asked Mrs. Castle to raise the matter i n the House of Commons. In addition, Keith approached several College dignitaries for help i n providing references that might lend weight to his appeal. The student pre­sidents and the Warden of the Hostel readily agreed to help, and letters were sent to Mrs. Castle, the High Commlsloner for Pakistan, and Mr. A.H. Albu, who i s an M.P. on the governing body of the College. The letters explained that, he Is not only a member of the expedition,! but also i t s originator.

M i l l e r had been a valuable and industrious member of college society during his stay at I.C. The letters asked that the ban be withdrwn or else at least some reasonable explanation be given.

The l i v e l y discussion that took place i n the House on May 9th. was f u l l y reported i n the Times next day and mentioned i n a number of the other daily papers. Mrs Castle asked a ma bar of questions about the nature of information that i s passed by the B r i t i s h Government to the Governments of the Commonwealth i n such c i r ­cumstances and the right of appeal i n such a case. She also asked questions about the M i l l e r case i n particular. The discussion included a speech from Mr. Albu who spoke up for Keith and Mr. Callaghan commented that the whole case smacked of McCarthy!SB.

A copy of Hansard has been purchased and placed i n the reading room for a l l those whs would Ilka to read the proceedings l a f u l l .

Tha result,as we now know was a resounding triumph for Keith and his band of determined supporters. Mr. Alport (Under Secretary of State for Commonwealth Ralatioas) announced that the Pakistan Govexnaaat had withdrawn i t s objection to M i l l e r (this waeprasuaabiy baaed on information supplied to them by tha B r i t i s h Government).

axis WILLIS, whe was President of Guilds

last year obtained a 'first', and has beam

working at SugVy since. He hopes to return te

I.C. next year*

c I

� I

L

W

WHEN B A T T E R S E A CAME TO S. KEN

A f t e r months of comparative peace, ragging broke out agata as a r e s u l t of the f l y i n g v i s i t to the Union of a Battersaa Poly p u b l i c i t y team of "hot g o s p e l l e r s " .

Shortly a f t e r 1 p.m. a fawn Morris truok was seen to approaoh the Union at high speed from an E a s t e r l y d i r e c t i o n . The p u b l i c i t y campaigners were dumped out­side the B o l t Arohway and a a t i o l p a t i n g the tyre d e f l a t i o n a r y and sparking plug remo­va l tendenoies of I.C. t h e i r vehiole was then moved to a safer parking plaoe. The

ten and maidens from B i t t e r s e a dressed i n nderclothing and sheet* - whioh they pro-

A number of anomalies merit contemplations -1) Why did the senior members of tha Exploration Beard sot inform the student awafeers of the

decision considerably earlier, than they did. 2) How was tha conclusion reached that the ban

was irrevocable. I t seems somehow strange that i n a week Mr. M i l l e r has managed to reverse the decision not te grant him a visa, when the Exploration Board had fai l e d to do so. Kitch was informed that raising the matter In an endeavour to change the decision might only lead to mora troubles and Keith jeopardised even more rf the ban became widespread knowledge.

On the face of i t there can be only one answer that the college i n trying not to dirty i t s nose with any public exposure aid i t * hast initially

t i keep the whole procedure 'la camera'. Con­

sidering the position i n which the college finds

itself, that was understandable as long as Keith did not know. However, when he had declared his

Intention to have the whole matter thrashed oat,

i f need be at the highest level irrespective ef

incidental r i s k s , i t was the college that should

have stood at his shoulder and given his whole

hearted support.

fflffa S T continued on nags 2.

— Hi i |i .)rH,- i

bably always wear - and oarrying plaoarde exp l a i n i n g the purpose of their v i s i t ,

ereseed the B e i t Quadrangle and entered

the Union Bulldog by the door near the bar Hopes f o r some goad sport In the bar were however dashed when the1 party turned l e f t i nto the lounge. They made a short but noisy tour of the ground f l o o r without being molested but on reaching the Beit

Arohway found that their way was barred. Hoses belonging to the stone cleaning oom-pany came i n very handy and the oooupants of the Hew Hostel had t h e i r water dispen­sing reoeptaoles primed. The Poly hop p u b l i o l s e r s , mae and female, escaped a f t e r the b r i e f but energetic aquatic sport ses­sion whloh followed and very l i t t l e e f f o r t was made to prevent t h e i r departure by truok. This v e h i c l e nude a return run past the Union at high speed s c a t t e r i n g the assembled crowd.

At t h i s point, c i v i l war broke out. Long standing differences of opinion bet­ween the f l o o r s of the hostel became appa­rent as h o s t i l i t i e s broke out. The orowd i n the road were treated to an enjoyable d i s p l a y of water throwing. The President of I.C.W.A. undeterred by one drenohing, now protected by a bathing cap, reappeared at her window and gave vent to her f e e l i n g s by douahg thorn s h e l t e r i n g under an umbrella

on the baloony. Several blue helaeted

gentlemen were observed i n the background^ and one waa seen to enter the Union.

On the opposite side of the road a

considerable amount of water leaked frea

the top floors of the Aero department.

However, tha aeronauts discovered that the

pressure in the f i r s hose was lneaffialeat

for th* water te reach tha other side e*

the road. A l l hostilities ceased at 2p.a.

2 X

P R O F I L E S

THE

" W i l l 70a w r i t * a l i t t l * sooner,"said the E d i t o r t o h i s awn, "Press day i s now upon us and wa havn't r a i s e d a pen. Think how an g r i l y our readers and subscribers would protest I f they hadn't got t h e i r Friday rag with whioh they always j e s t . " W i l l yon, won't you, w i l l you, won't you, w i l l you s t a r t to writ*? W i l l you, won't you, w i l l you, won't you, w i l l yon s t a r t t o w r i t * ?

"Ton r e a l l y have no notion how demented I s h a l l be, I f they w r i t * and t e l l me even one* they hate the gats of me." But a l l the board with one accord immediately said "Ton know i t r e a l l y i s through us that F e l i x can be read." Can't you, won't you, cant' you, won't you, can't you s t a r t to write? Can't you, won't you, can't you, won't you, can't you s t a r t to write?

" I t matters l i t t l e at what time we a l l see f i t to come For no matter when we s t a r t , the job i s always done." At l a s t the suffering E d i t o r decides HE w i l l begin, And h i s merry band of helpers decide they w i l l j o i n i n . W i l l you, won't you, w i l l you, wont you, won't you s t a r t to type* W i l l you, won't you, w i l l yon, won't you, won't you s t a r t to type/

T H E S T H A T B E

While none of the characters i n this photo­graph i s actually carrying the Times, they are a l l Top People. F e l i x offers no prize|to the f i r s t to identify them. Their separate l i k e ­nesses have each adorned these papers before, and they now do so together because of theeditor's metaphysical beli e f i n emergent evo­lution: the doctrine, that the assembly may add up to more than the sum of the parts.

The parts themselves are i n t r i n s i c a l l y remarkable. The seated,sages,Tony Goodings, John Hart and Mike Rutter, who guide the destinies of R.C.S., Guilds and Mines, are each formidable figures. The l a s t two,particularly, bring a wider vision to Onion discussions from their exotic backgrounds i n Rhodesia and Lancas­hire. A l l have admired the versatile mastery of t h i s t r i o at freshers dinners, Union meetings, carnivals,and i n the dignified old world atmosphere of the various formal dances. Then, loomiagfrom the insets, there are the less-publicised figures of retired oarsman Kim Ash and barn­storming Les Allen. These gentlemen, the Chair­men of A.C.C. and S.C.C., spin a mysterious finan­c i a l web i n the background, and distribute vast sums of Union money to the clubs.

Standing l e f t , and much improving the picture, Miss Wendy Pipe, the President of I.C.W.A. Seldom can this depressed class have had a l i v e ­l i e r leader, or one so accurate with a saucepan-f u l of water.

Standing right, Union Secretary Andy Levine, one-tlae Guilds president, twice Student Orator, and now (supreme honour!) Student Bedell-elect for May 28th.

Centre, bestriding the whirlwind and direct­ing the stora, the originator of the Kitchener Doctrine of 'give'em h e l l ' . The Union President, a man of foresight (tipped Crepello for the Derby at Christmas), has served i n many offices, but never to such valuable (and sometimes de­vastating) effect as now.

Above the individual eccentricities of this exceptional octet rises their collective cont­ribution to student democracy and independence during this year of re-establishment and re-consolidation. Tha Union depends on the w i l l i n g and capable, characters who man i t s (frequently tedious) coamittees and give up much of their spare time to man them.If the electorate picks as good a collection of forthright spokesmen for next session i t w i l l have done well.

R J U B I L E E For the oonvenieno* of i t s readers, F e l i x reproduces the acre important d e t a i l s of the o f f i c i a l programme f o r *aj28th»

2 Mr. A l l e n w i l l take t h * Gentleman-is*--Waiting's hat, and w i l l place i t l a the Powder Eoos.

3.1*

3.24

3.28

Mr. Batter, Mr. Goodings, Mr. Bart m& Mr. Levine, who w i l l b* l a t h * Freoes-s i p a and on the Platform, should be !• posi t i o n near t h * Powder Room at 2.40, and whan the Chancellor has *nt*r*d t a * Reading Roost they w i l l taka p o s i t i o n f a r the Proosssiea (with Mr. Lavias, the Student B e d e l l i n front) near the entsaaas to the vestibule j u s t i n a l d * the 3ealaa> Coarjoa Room,

Bofara taw Cbaacallssr r i s e s , Hr< Saaford. who w i l l o* l a t a * wimga (aorta.) w i l l B0T* the nearest aiorsphoaa aad glass I t han^y t o the Chanoallar.

When tha applause f a r the SkwasaUar's speech diss down, Mr. Ssafars w i l l p laa* tha aiorophoas l a front a f tha

W M » tha applaase f o r Jfcv died down, t b * feats* w i l l thanks of fiat Callage t a t t e

3.33 Bigkt t a l l aeatara of the Guard of Hon­our, instructed by Mr. Hewoy, w i l l be i n oharg* of t h * eight large umbrellas, aad w i l l s h elter Her Majesty and other members of t a * prooeaaienal party across t a * Gar­den and P r i a a * (..esor* Road.

(See Water Rag Report) � The Chanoellear, together with those l a attendano*, w i l l go by taw west antr-anoe of the Large Structures Laboratory t o the court yard where the 3 College assoots w i l l as drawn up t * tha sooth. �

I f the weather i s wat t h * Large B B ~ teallss w i l l be ased f o r t h * return jom-

Whsa Mr. Annas sees the Cibmaoellar i a s -peatiag. tha Hasoots he w i l l go t e taa B a i t Arotaray aad l a f e r a Mr. Barley mt» w i l l as t a the Walaa B u i l d i n g sad iatwaa Mr. Washy who w i l l ha at the fciaa Sees?. Mr. Bewfcy w i l l wars tas s t s i a - f a am aaah ftasr sad t h * stewards *a tha f i r s * Osjaw f i l l wax* those l a the aiming S a i l .

4*1? f * a w a l l ho se«we&

5.99 Sr. A l l a a w i l l tafej, »««0«'*J«*te-Wnit tag's hat ttim f

i t 1 '

Th* Engineer's B a l l l a s t Friday night turned out t c be i t s usual u n r i v a l l e d sue* cess. I t started at a few minutes paat eight whan a somewhat inebriated top table stumbled i n , and a f t e r finding t h e i r places, t h * dinner was served. This was an excellent meal - with shrimps, chicken, etc. The only f a u l t with t h * dinner was that the main d i s h provided was beer. One or two of the l a d i e s seeaed to l i k e t h i s , but on the whole they preferred t o renaln dry.

When the dinner f i n a l l y f i n i s h e d the band had already been playing f o r over an hour to the few non-diners. The arrangement of t h * Concert H a l l was w e l l done, with arm-obnivs and tables suitably arranged. The dancing l a s t e d u n t i l sua., the f l o o r being never empty and never crowded. Our corresp­ondent considers that t h i s was on* of t h * best s o c i a l events f o r a long t i n e .

R

KEITH MILLER, continued. Last year M i l l e r was rig h t l y highly

praised for his work i n helping to found the Exploration Board which was one of the college showpieces. This year when trouble i s i n the a i r , the college even though assured of the good publicity from the Expedition tried to hush up the whole business. Apparently loyalty to i t s students does not extend to the risk of a l i t t l e publicity. Hot that such publicity would have any adverse effects on the college for i s i t not reasonable to suppose that every­one would sympathise with a college seeking to have such a ban removed or at least to be inform­ed of the reasons why the ban was placed/' As Mr. M i l l e r has been heard to say i n the Bar, "lou know who your real friends are when you real l y need them".

I t i s reassuring to know that the democratic machine does operate and that secret governmental decisions can be reversed and someone had to climb down. Readers of Feli x w i l l rejoice i n this and wish Keith and his merry band the very best of luck i n them thar h i l l s .

« stave sias, aoxj ajSaoiae w&9?ofdsns S^OOT, ea, *tT*aW

X �

I t i s unfortunate that Dai G r i f f i n should he away from h i s regular post at a time when the news has reaohed n a t i o n a l proportions - we do not ask him to be i n any way responsible f o r the opinions ex­pressed, although we suspect that he w i l l agree with them.

The news of K e i t h K i l l e r and the sentiments i t provokes are dealt with e l s e ­where but there i s one point we would l i k e to emphasise. The skeleton i n the Gov­ernment department's cupboard has boon w e l l and t r u l y r a t t l e d by Mrs. Barbara Castle) such i s the means by which democratic rul e i s maintained. There s t i l l remains the smell i n our own back-yard - not wishing to base our argument on more than f a c t ( a l ­though d e t a i l e d rumours seem almost beyond d e n i a l ) , we would underline the a t t i t u d e of aut h o r i t y described on the f r o n t page.

"Suggest you resign because of i l l h ealth." "Mo-one need ever know". "Advise you to acoept the d e c i s i o n with no fuss. " The B r i t i s h Parliament q u i c k l y r a i s e d the 3tone that the College was a f r a i d - yes, AFRAID - to touch. And a very unpleasant a f f a i r was found underneath* We do not seek to defend M i l l e r , however much we may sympathise with him. We only demand that those responsible f o r a s s i s t i n g him to obtain a f a i r hearing be made to r e a l i s e how badly they l e t him down. In doing so, they have caused rather than avoided the adverse p u b l i c i t y which seems to be there r u l i n g passion and made the student body d i s t r u s t the administration under which they f i n d them-selves.

I.C. Union Meetings have be*n f a i r l y w e l l attended t h i s year - f o r the Union to represent us a l l , t h i s i s a very neo-essary f a c t o r . Despite exam, pressure i t should not be too much to expect to see you on the 23rd. May. (Anyway, i t would please K i t c h '•).

A l a s t serious note - F e l i x takings In Guilds entranoe were nearly ten s h i l l i n g s s h o r t . We assume t h i s i s due to copies not being paid f o r (r a t h e r than t h e f t of, cash) and would remind readers that i f we are to remain independent the few s h i l l i n g s whioh separate us from bankruptcy are very v i t a l .

With that I hand you baok to Dai -and the best of luok t

T H E F H C E N I X

COMMQ 3001

L E T T E R S T O T H E E D I T / O H

Sear S i r ,

Tour correspondent, nr. gecchial i s talking through the top ef his head whan he says that our privacy w i l l not be endangered by woman drinking i n the bar. At present the bar i s one of the two places into which these insidious creatures have not j e t i n ­f i l t r a t e d . There are already several strains of mala f l o r a and fauna i n our bar which frankly make ue baulk; women would be the last straw.

This apart, English Womanhood snould be protected from the sight of the wireless and milk bottle smashing element i n their cups. BO S i r , as anyone who has been to U.C. on "Union Night" w i l l agree, keep tha monsters out.

Tours etc, J . Carter J.L. Sellers

INDEPENDENT

E

BY

I t i s with a certain amount of d i s i l l u s i o n ­ment that I s i t down to pen the second i n i n s t a l ­ment i n this series. The f i r s t , i n the last issue, was expected to promote a flood of angry l e t t e r s . The response has been negligible.

Having been i n the College for a sufficient time to j u s t i f y an opinion, i t i s mine that the student population shows an unwarranted lack of f a m i l i a r i t y with the rules of English grammar and with spelling. One may find examples of this deficiency i n this very journal(although many of the errors are typographical ones, i t must be asserted). The opinion i s quite widely held that schooling up to G.C.E. may be blamed.

Passing from walking to running, examination of a f a i r sample of reports by undergraduates and postgraduates of their practical work shows that industry might benefit i f some formal instruction were given i n technical writing at the University stage. There have been Third year courses i n Guild's devoted to this aim, but t h i s appeal i s for more widespread instruction. The writing of

Dear Six,

Last Issue's l e t t e r from Kr. J.C.Wright prompts me to add a further query concerning the college crest. Why does the word SKIIZIA have to be written with such a mixture of scripts? Also I would Like to know s reason, able translation of the motto "SCIENTIA -BtFJERII - DBCTS - IT - T0TANEN" as I have yet to find one though I have asked several peopl*.

Another point which 1 have noticed con­cerns the R.C.S. t i e s . Which way up should the white and purple stripes be? I have seen specimens both of the possible ways.

Tours s t c , Gerard P.

R. C.S. Moss.

* " M ! I ! r ? i 4 U °°™«P«»demt repU.,..

(1) 'daea i t matter'

Our C l a a a i c a l Correspondent was heard to s n t t a r ~ " w n i aeous et tutamen >T+

i t r * " I . h i * * ! f r a t i 8 t ' ( p i n t . r . 'Qu..as* (tki f a f i 1 L 5 * t H h e har was ehut on Sunday.) Ed.

what Professor lapp styled "functional English! i s an art not easily acquired i n the short time of three years without guidance from someone who practices i t well. Acknowledging Shaw, these paragraphs are intended as an object lesson and not as an example.

The topic of the "brownbagger" i s worth keeping alive and especially comes into prominence at examination times. I f a man decides to work as hard as he i s able, and to resist the temptations of the playing f i e l d and the bridge-table, and through strength of character adheres to his dec­i s i o n , surely his conduct Is to be admired. On the other hand the weak-willed person who lapses into "brownbagging" because i t i s the easiest way by which he can reach examination standard, and who i s too lazy to be tempted by extra-cur­r i c u l a r a c t i v i t i e s , i s nothing but a parasite. The next time you sporting readers pitch into a beery denouncement of "brownbaggers"' remember that there are many species of worm and at least two species of bookworm.

NEWSJAZZ CLUB BAND.

Last Sunday the band spent several hours recording some of t h e i r numbers. They hope to have a long-playing reoord on sale towards the end of term. As the cost per record w i l l go down as the numbers ordered go up| i t l a hoped that as many as poseible airtierasted w i l l order copies. Contaot fony'Hodgson, (Room 22, Old H o s t e l ) , or Graham Harvey,(Chea I ) , f o r f u r t h e r d e t a i l e . Remember, t h i s record w i l l be a sound momento of your stay at I.C.

GUILDS UNION MEETING

At the ordinary General Meeting of the C. A G. Union held on May 9th., the President outlined the plan to exhibit the spanner, and informed the Union that i t was hoped that the spanner would be mounted before the next Onion Meeting.

The Union were informed that the I.C.M. was to he held on Hay 30th and a l l nominations were to be recieved by the 23rd. The Tice President spake a few words about the Field Cup Race which i s to fellow the A.SJt. and the meeting s ended,as usual,with a Boomalacka.

U.TFL0VBH I I I -PBIttX AID FLTUO-FISI.

"The f e l l o u a g a l g a a l , dated May l o t h , has beam reoeived from the aayflewewi-

F e l i x , the swath-old eat, sought f i r e s f l y i n g f i s h te f l y aboard and now ax l a t & i n i a g soastestt p a t r o l l a seuppero f o r mora sues, ttoaee."

a f t e r many soars of t o i l , awe of vast ssjss of aoaey, 'Clementina' was seen l a nation the other day, going u p h i l l a t oeBaidarabl* v e l o e i t y . sad B.L. asm sad woman wSU agpo* that «aa easdae sassfld Ve nrwirjaoxort i a - l o l s U o , Toaptatioas *• VeaOs* aer with paint or l a t e r f era l a any way v i t a , tho a l l

should ho r e s i s t e d l a ,

i - t u x

E A T E Beginning a new.eerial of love and

paaaion sat i n tha heart of the Onion.

Leonora stood on the edge of the dance f l o o r a pathetic f i g u r e - mousey h a i r Just touching her drooping shoulders, her s q u i n t i n g eyes misty w i t h the unshed t e a r s , her mouth a l i t t l e too large f o r true beauty. Those swimming eyes f o l ­lowed the dashing Rugger captain as he awept by laughing g a i l y oyer the shoulder of a b e a u t i f u l woman, and i t was l i k e * k n i f e t u r n i n g i n her tortured breast .

There was a ohoklng sensation i n her t h r o a t , and rushing from the h a l l she threw h e r s e l f down i n the Ladies Cloak­room, the b i t t e r tears f l o w i n g unoheoked down her ashen oheeks. Soon the sobs wracked her body l e s s o f t e n , and the con­v u l s i v e shudderings ceased. She sat up and looked at her r e f l e c t i o n i n the m i r r o r . How had she come to t h i s s o r r y state?

Her thoughts went baok to the day she had f i r s t met Snotty as h i a f r i e n d s a f f e c ­t i o n a t e l y c a l l e d him - the t a l l handsome Snotty who only ten minutes p r e v i o u s l y had out her dead out there on the dance f l o o r .

I t had mot been a romantic meeting -the r e f e c t o r y queue and Leonora s t r u g g l i n g to manage a lunch t r a y , a b o t t l e of m i l k , a book.and a purse. Suddenly Snotty had appeared i n f r o n t of Leonora - soarf slung r a k i s h l y around h i s neok, d u f f l e coat askew and with that one aided smile whioh she had come to love so much, he had bowed1 low and i n one sweeping movement r e l i e v e d her of her purse. "Tou look so b e a u t i f u l i n that white dress with the pea green soup s t a i n showing o f f your slender neok and shoulders

- I can't r e s i s t h elping you." He tou­ched her elbow and a s h i v e r went through her whole body whi«h set her pulses beat­ing and sent the blood rushing to her oheeks. "But I hardly know you," Leonora stammered, but by the end of lunch she f e l t that she had known him f o r a long time. They had so many things i n common

- they both read books, ate f i s h and ohips and drank tea; they both l i k e d wash­ing i n the morning and shaving only onoe a day - oh, there were so many thin g s . When at the end of the meal he had asked

her to walk w i t h him across the quadrangle

i t had seemed the only n a t u r a l t h i n g to de.

Her thoughts aped on over the happy days that had followed. - t h e i r f i r s t r i d e on a bus together, t h e i r f i r s t f i l m t o ­gether, and then the f i r s t time he had k i s ­sed her - Just four months a f t e r t h e i r f i r s t meeting. They had been toalectur e on rug making and had walked back to the s t a t i o n through the subway. Wh e n they were nearly at the end Snotty had suddenly stopped and turned, and sweeping her faee with hia gasa he caught her ahouldera aad hi s smouldering eyes looked deep i n t o hers as he s a i d s o f t l y , h i s voice trembling, "Oh, Leonora - come and. have ooffee with me tonight?" and than he had k i s s e d her very gently on the l i p s , but she oould f e e l the burning paasion behind h i a touohi andshe had gone g l a d l y to ooffee with him beoause she knew with a l l her heart and mind that she would never be as t h i r s t y aa she was at that moment.

And now - Snotty was out there danc­ing w ith another, looking i n t o another woman's eyes, saying to her a l l those l i t ­t l e t h i n g * whioh mean so much.

"Oh Snotty, Snotty", she whispered, "how oeuld you spurn my love?"

She oolleoted her crash helmet and o i l s k i n and waked out of the Cloakrooal Ouvstte she bumped in t o W i l l y - the boy who worked on the bench next to hers. W i l l y had made i t obvious from the f i r s t day that they had shared the r a b b i t ' s r e c ­tus that Leonora was the only g i r l f o r him} but to her W i l l y had alwaya been Just the boy with the best g a l l bladder and nothing

But now he took her hand with a f r i e n d l y gesture, and her eyes . f e l l to the f l o o r beneath h i s penetrating gaae. Onoe again the pearly drops welled up i n her ohina blue eyes and voioe cracking she mur­mured, " W i l l y , what oan I do?" W i l l y ga­thered her i n t o h i s arms. His head bent over hers, and she looked up at him eyea elazed, l i p s s l i g h t l y parted At _ that moment the door was f l u n g open and Snotty stood there, muscles r i p p l i n g , nos­t r i l s f l a r i n g . Leonora f e l l baok s t a r t l e d

What does Snotty want? What does W i l l y want?

Read next week'a instalment of t h i e passionate love s t o r y .

ivhxln Bali

N E L S O N Like many of the f i t t i n g s i n t h i s Hew

Union of ours, the new l i f t appears to be wholly inadequate. I t w i out of a e t i o n r e e e n t l y f o r several days, and even when on * oaa nae the t h i n g everything i s not we w a l l , f a r one t h i n g , the doors take an

• Interminable length o f time to open and i t appears that i f the l i f t a tioka between f l o o r s the only escape l a by s t a r v a t i o n . However, we ar* informed that the porters are to be i n s t r u c t e d i n rescue methods. I t would a l s o help n a t t e r s considerably i f i r r e s p o n s i b l e couples r e f r a i n e d f r o a atopplng the l i f t between f l o o r s i n order to nae i t aa a p r i v a t e snoggery.

Perhaps the f a c t that there waa no women present at the aeoOnd year Engine­ers dinner r e o e n t l y , aooouhta f o r the exoessively rowdy behaviour whioh oaused Ted Smith, at one stage,to refuae to serve anyone. While t h i s column i s not averse to "a b i t of aport" now and then, throwing glasses over one's ahoulder, we f e e l , i a t a k i n g things a b i t to f a r ) I n c i d e n t a l l y , we feear t h a t making making c u t t i n g remarks i s g e t t i n g p r e t t y unpopular with t h i s group. Ta l k i n g about Engineers, at the dinner pro­ceeding the Engineers' B a l l , Mr. J . L e B — t was heard to aay that he had f a i l e d to seduce ( s o r r y - induoe) the Bean'a eeoretary to do something or other.

Who waa tha young lady who waa seen to disappear smartly through a r e f e o t o r y window a f t e r being i n v i t e d to ooffee i n room 17, Old Hostel on Sports Bay? And while on the subject of young l a d i e s , our pet subjeot, the f o l l o w i n g remark was heard from a young lady s o o l o g i a t , " I f you w i l l lend me a s u i t of armour, I w i l l go to the e a r n i v a l with you".

Some Miners were present at a s t r i p ­tease d i s p l a y given by some inmates of the h o s t e l f o r young l a d i e s , whioh i s v i s i b l e from the upper r e f e o t o r y . I n o l d e n t a l l y i t i s believed that i f one turns about, the view there i a n ' t bad e i t h e r . Perhaps these were the same miners who oame baok from t h e i r survey t r i p i n Cornwall l e a v i n g t h e i r s t a f f to f i n i s h the survey and p o s s i ­b l y patoh up r e l a t i o n s with the Cornish f o l k .

As readers are already f u l l y aware, the Queen Mother Is opening tha Roderio H i l l B u i l d i n g on May 28th. Her detective i s be­l i e v e d to have already made several s e c u r i t y hunts about the plaoe, to f i n d s u i t a b l e places f o r dropping a r o h i t e o t u r a l clangers. Two high o f f i o i a l s of the governing body were being shown round by a prominent planner. The elder o f f i c i a l was heard to say, "Oh, i t ' s a nuisanoe having a l l these door*. •• Tou r e a l i s e that these w i l l a l l hay* to be open so that ahe oan walk s t r a i g h t through, because no one can walk In front of her. And what about theae?" ( P o i n t i n g to a p a i r of awing doors leading to a dark oorridor) The planner r e p l i e d , " I t h i n k we oan arrange that the appropriate doors are open, as f o r these doors, she doesn't have to go down there, so they oan remain shut." L i t t l e does Her Majesty know how her v i s i t s are arranged.

I n o i d e n t a l l y i t i e a l s o brought to our notiee that Mr. Len Sweett, the stage e l e o t -r i o i a n , has to have 27 passes to reach the l i g h t i n g g a l l e r y , where he w i l l be guarded by a eontingent of policemen and guard-doge. What happens to the l i g h t i n g i f Len loaes a pass? �

s �l

>

F E L I X

D R I N K I N G - F O U N T A I N S /

The many drink i n g fountains and o a t t i e troughs I n tha Borough of Kensington are a legacy whioh dates baok nearly a century. Within ons mile of the Albert H a l l there e x i s t more than twenty drin k i n g fountains, three of whioh are integrated with c a t t l e troughs. S u r p r i s i n g l y the majority s t i l l function and most of the fountains are f i t t e d with some sort o f battered a l l o y drinking mug hung on a length of chain. Th* provisio n of t h i s fitment enables one to drink i n a c i v i l i s e d manner - instead of s u f f e r i n g the i n d i g n i t y o f presenting one's face to a wavering j e t of c o l d water.

T h i r s t y dumb animals are not neglected either. The production model drink i n g foun­t a i n supplied by the Metropolitan Drinking Fountains and C a t t l e Troughs Association, (M.D.F. and C.T. Assn.) has a small foot­bath i n the base of the fountain from whioh lower creatures may drink.

Many of the l o c a l drinking fountains are Interesting as examples of monumental work and as sources of l o c a l h i s t o r y . The o l d fountain opposite the t a x i rank on Kensing­ton Gore shows the charitable nature of the l o c a l residents. 'Presented t o the P a r i s h by an inhabitant of Kensington i n 1859' i t i s now believed t o provide tea-water f o r the nearby t a x i - d r i v e r s ' canteen. The c a t t l e trough beside the canteen bears the i n s c r i p ­t i o n , 'be kind and merciful t o a l l animals; i n memory of Esther Benjamin, f824 -1879.' Through the M.D.F. and C.T. Assn. the Ben­jamin family have been associated with other c a t t l e troughs; on* i n Bayswatar Road i s a t t r i b u t e d to David Benjamin, 1815 t o 1895-

Just o f f the Broad Walk In Kensington Gardens a bronze fountain was 'erected i n 1951 t o mark the s i t e of an ancient spring whioh i n 1856 was named St. Gorvor'a Well

( A f t e r answering these questions honestly, tarn to page 7 to see what type you are) 1) Do you get up

a) i n t i a e f o r breakfast b) i s time f o r lectures o) i n time f o r lunch

2) Do you wash a) before meals b) one* a day o) not at a l l

J ) Do you aat a) at tha Savoy b) at Jane Brawn's o) at Mooney's d) not at a l l

4) In lectures do you wear a) a s k i r t b) trousers o) both d) n e i t h e r

a f t e r t h * patron saint of Hanover by S i r Benjamin H a l l , the f i r s t Commissioner of Works, 1855 t o 1858, and created Lord Lien -over i n 1859.*

Th* fountain given by His Highness the Maharajah of Vijianagran Is c e r t a i n l y t h * largest fountain i n t h i s d i s t r i o t and i s t h * only one with r o y a l associations; f o r t h i s , 'Cattle Trough' has been omitted from the M.D.F. and C.T. Assn. t i t l e on t h * plaque. I t was erected i n 1867 but unfortunately t h * sandstone steeple with i t s buttresses, g r i f f i n s and gargoyles has been severely eroded and i t i s now surrounded by a paling.fanes f o r protect­ion.

Tha fountain marking the 80th. anniv­ersary of the Association i s crowaed w i t h a oharming bronze statuette of two bear cubs f i g h t i n g ; i t i s the work of Keeble Smith.

Other fountains are too numerous t o describe i n d e t a i l . On one i n Hyde Park, a nymph seated on a w a t e r - l i l y l e a f holds a spouting dolphin under each arm. By St. George's Hospital a flower s e l l e r uses one as a vass, and tha fountain i n Exhib­i t i o n Road ( i n memory of L.S.P., June 8th. 1879 i s used by t h * vendor of a technical publication.

Thar* i s no information on the ph y s i c a l and o h — i o a l properties of the water flow­ing from the fountains or on i t s r a t s of flow. The Association i s s t i l l erecting fountains, the l a t e s t being outside Ca l t s x Hons* i n Brampton Read. They w i l l surely mark t h e i r centenary i n two years time with a more f o r t i f y i n g l i q u i d than water flowing from the fountains.

Discover what kind of man (or woman) TOO era.

5) Do you have your h a i r out a) onoe a week bJ onoe a t a r n o) at harvest t i a e d) not at a l l

6) Do you l i k e your g i r l - f r i e n d t o ha dressed a) i n afternoon dress h i i n evening dress o) i n nightdress d) not at a l l

7) Do you *xpaot t o receive your degree a) t h i s year b) next veer e l soaatiao d) never

8) Ds you go to bed a) alone

• b) with a hot water s e t t l e 0} w i t h a teddy bear 4) with

C O M I N G E V E N T S

F r l . 17th May

R.C.S. Country House B a l l . Silwood Park. 10p.m. -6a.m. Coach departs f r o a Union 8.45p.m.

Jas s Club. A. CM. 1.165p.m. Km 21 Guilds

Sat. 1l8th May Swimming Club Hop. 8p.m.-11.J0p.m. i s I.C.Onion

Tickets 2/- s i n g l e , 5/6 double

Tnura. 23rd May Union A. CM. 1.15p.m. i n Concert H a l l . Presidents

report, e l e c t i o n o f next years Council and Entertainments Committee. Reports of A.C.C. sad S.C.C. Chairmen.

Toes. 28th May Riding Club A.CM. 1.30p.m. i n Committee Room of

Onion Lounge

Thurs. 30th May Guilds Onion A. CM. and Sleotions. FIELD COP RACE

O.L.O.Sumaer Term Lances Held i n Onion Assembly H a l l (the "Hut"). Tickets

2/6 from Collegs 0,L.0.Agent or from O.L.O. Offi c e . Dates :- Sat May 18th

Sat May 25th Sat June 8th Sat June 15th

G U I L D S ' D I N N E R

On Wednesday, May 8 t h r a dinner was held f o r second year Quildsmen, with the objeot of prompting interdepartaasntal f r a t e r n i s a t i o n . ' About 30fo of the year attended, with Marian Blaaek, from the Mechanical Dept., presiding.

After a few short speeches, the diners ad­journed t o the bar where a boat-race («) was organised between three i teams representing C i v i l s , Mechanicals, and A combined team of Aeros, E l e o t r i o a l s , and Cham.Techs. The "com­bined servioes" won with a time of 1 minute 38 seconds.

A f t e r t h i s sporting event, community s i n ­ging was perpetrated.

(*) Boat-race : bot'ras : Colloq.Sng. n . A race between teams of sight i n d i v i d u a l s . Th* f i r s t man i n t h * team has to drink a p i n t of beer, and having fini s h e d , place the glass upon his head, whereupon the next man i n the team doss the same. The f i r s t team t o f i n i s h ( i . e . with every man having an empty p i n t glass on h i * head) wins.

Upper Refectory

Now, at l a s t , the Opper Refectory i s open, and the large queues at Mooney'a other eating places should be expected to shorten as i t comes into more general usage. I t i s open Monday to Friday at the following times.

12.00 - 2.00 p.m. f o r salad lunces and sand­wiches.

3.30 - 5.00 p.m. Light snacks (e.g. beans on toast) and teas.

5.00 - 6.00 p.m. As above plus one main hot dish for l i g h t supper (varied d a i l y ) .

There i s also the added attraction of a good view into Q.A. (see Nelson).

P e r s o n a l A d v e r t i s e m e n t s

For Sale 1 1 p a i r of Rugger boots, and 1 p a i r of blue s h o r t s . Must go. Apply Business Man­ager , F e l i x , v i a Onion Haok.

FOR SALS: 1 BSA 500oc* M20 motor cycle. Reason­able condition. £15 o.n.o. 1 Royal E n f i e l d Sports Model B i c y c l e . £5o.n.O»

John Hart, Ra 53, New Hostel, o r Guild's Rack.

TWO TRAVELLING COMPANIONS (aale) t o share expen­ses on oar t r i p t o Malta. Journey t o s t a r t e a r l y J u l y , v i a P a r i s , R i v i e r a , and Rome.

P.Sullivan, Old Hostel.

Would the persons who ordered photographs l a s t t e n of the F e l i x Beard competition please c o l ­l e c t thorn f r e e the F e l i x Room as soon as poaaisua between 1 and 2p.m. The F e l i x Rooa i s on the t h i r d f l o o r of the Union Building, opposite the l i f t s s a f t , J.K.T.

SPORT S U C C E S S AND F A I L U R E

In the U.L. T r i a l s , three members of I.C. d i s ­tinguished themselves; Brian Curtis i n the furlong, Terry Hyslop i n the 120 and 440 yds. hurdles events and Dave Smith i n the Hop Step and Jump. The l a t t e r produced a jump of 47'2", which unfortunately was not allowed.

These three members of the Club, plus Les Locke,! represented the University i n the match against Paris on Sunday 5th. May. Here Smith won with a triple-jump of 46'6". This, and Hyslop's perfor­mance of 55-6 sees, i n the 440yds. hurdles, make them rank i n the best twelve performers i n Great B r i t a i n i n the last year. The previous evening i n Paris may have had some stimulating! mental effect.

I.C. have had one match, versus Sheffield and Birmingham Universities (at Sheffield), i n which we were l a s t . However, we introduced new songs into their bar and enjoyed t h e i r Hop. Much, sport (but no can-can dancing) was also exhibited oh the early morning t r a i n home.

We had a weak team at the above meeting and t h i s i s partly due to the indifference shown by members i n t h e i r support of the College club. In some events we cannot even raise the required a number of competitors and the points for placings are thus being thrown away. More enthusiasm i s required and a l l members are asked to keep a close watch on the notice-board. New recruits of any standard are s t i l l most welcome.

athletics S P O R T S DAY.

Coming Athletice Fixture* •

WW 22^' 2!* C 0 l l e 8 e W Wimbledon

wee?' »" y f 1 1 8 1 0 1 * C A R D I F F N N I ' S ( A ) Bristol! Wed. 29th. Bay Loughborough (A ) !

100 YARDS

Once again ICWSC f i e l d e d a team of g a l l a n t , brave, dauntless, unfaultering sportswomen t o p a r t i c i p a t e i n the U.L.Championships. They fought t h e i r way t o the f i n a l s , t h e i r s p i r i t s undamped by t o r r e n t i a l r a i n , there to give a magnificent displa y of t h e i r a b i l i t y . As one Judge was heard t o remark t o another during the "Oh, here ocme the other two. Do you think they are going to finish?"And they d i d (eventually) t o win 5 points f o r I.C.

One competitor i n the high Jump oalmly announced her i n t e n t i o n t o s t a r t jumping at 4'6", the I.C. entrant however flew with grace and comparative ease over 3'6" t o f i n i s h equal 5th. The hurdler excelled hersel f by completing the course leaving a l l the hurdles standing and undamaged, to oome a v a l i a n t 5th.

The long Jump f i n a l i s t , apart from being surrounded by cameramen clamouring to take her photograph, also learnt how t o do the long Jump, never before having attempted such a magnificent feat.

The r e s u l t s ? f e l l ICWSC came 6th f o r the U.L.Challenge Cup and a close t h i r d f o r the Sherwood-Factor Cup.

Special mention should he mads o f Janet Peter­sen who came 2nd. i n the 880.yds. and has been asked t o represent London University i n ths B r i t i s h U n i v e r s i t i e s competition.

R U G G E R C L U B

At the A. CM. h e l d on Thurs.Znd. Hay the f o l l o w i n g o f f i c e r s were elected f o r next year.

Captain - E.D.Stone Vioe-Captain - O.H. G i l b e r t Hon.Seo. - D.M.Harrhy Hon.Matoh Sec. - A.Seed

The business of organising a tour i n S.v. France next Christmas was put i n the hands of next years oapable secretary before the mooting r e t i r e d t o the bar. Here Les Wilson, our Corn­w a l l tour coach d r i v e r , l e d a c o n v i v i a l evening and l a t e r the assembled company departed i n h i s dilapi d a t e d coach t o a l o c a l hostelry)

Despite the fact that t h i s major event was held much e a r l i e r i n the season t h i s year, College Records were set up i n the Shot Putt (J.W.S. Newman - 40' S i " " ) , Javelin (H.T.L. Evans -171'8'') and the mile medley relay (Guilds -3 mins 42.4 sees.). "Best Sports Performances" were set up i n two other events. One was i n the 120 yards hurdles by Terry Hyslop i n 15.5 sees, and the other was i n the 1-mile by John Evans (4 mins 13.1 sees) who made other runners re­semble cripples.

Rumoured lack of training of the'R.C.S. tug-of-war team was disproved when they beat Gpilds In the f i n a l after a lengthy l s t p u l l which brought spectators to t h e i r feet i n excitement.

Brian Curtis completed the double i n the sprints (10.2 and 23.3sees) and Les Locke won bo^h the 440 yards (51.4 sees.) and the -jt-mile (2 mins. 1.8 sees.).

With George Schenkel, the holder, missing a bruised knee, the pole vault t i t l e was taken by A.W. Smith who cleared 9'6" i n excellent s t y l e .

Both jumps were of a good standard, John* Hobson producing 20' 10$-" i n the long jump and T. Hyslop clearing i n the high jump.

Other notable performances were by t r i p l e -jumper Dave Smith who was 2nd. i n the jave l i n with 160.'7'.'i only 3' short of the old record, and Pete Rayment who led most of the way on the •Jr-mlle (2nd. i n 2 mins 2.8 sees.).

Congratulations to Guilds who won the Challenge Shield easily, with R.C.S. second.

The few spectators who did turn up to support their colleges were treated to an enjoyable afternoon's sport i n glorious weather.

The 1st. XI has not made a good start to the season, due mainly to the i n s t a b i l i t y of i t s bat­ting . However this early season rustiness i s beginning to disappear,as seen la s t Saturday,when I.C. h i t 154-8 declared against O.Sinjuns, and lost a very close match by two wickets i n the l a s t over of the day. Murden (53) and Shepherd (40) were the main contributors to the t o t a l .

Against L.S.E., the l s t . XI l o s t by one run, the l a s t eight wickets f a l l i n g for 12 runs.. In the match against Reading University they scored 207-6, whilst I.C. only managed to make 109-9. R.A.E.Farnborough were no match for the I.C. bow­le r s and were a l l out for 34, I.C. winning by eight wickets. The most successful bowler to date has been N.Bbattl, while J.Carter has bowled well but has suffered the fate of a l l slow bowlers -dropped catches.

The 2nd.XI has played three matches so f a r , a l l of which have bean drawn.

U.L. C H A M P I O N S H I P S

In the f i n a l s of the U.L.Championships on Sat. 11th May at Hotspur Park, I.C. narrowly l o s t the Roseberry Challenge ;Cup t o U.C. by 81 pts. to 70. the r e s u l t would have probably been much c l o s e r but f o r a motor-cycle accident to Hyslop on h i s way t o the track to appear i n four f i n a l s , and the absence of Locke, playing f o o t b a l l f o r Scot­land. Ve oan look forward t o next year w i t h con­siderable confidence, as several of ear freshers performed extremely w e l l , e s p e c i a l l y I n the events i n which we have not had f i n a l i s t s f o r several years, C u r t i s 2nd. i n the 220 and t h i r d i n the 100yds. and Newman 4th i n the shot. Evans, winning ths mile i n 40412.6 sees and Smith 1st i n the hop-step-snd-Jump, were our only i n d i v i d ­u a l winners, and deserve congratulations on t h e i r performances. Other I.C. positions were as follows :-

100yds. 3rd B.Curtis 220yds. 2nd B.Curtis 440yd\.. 6th J. T. Hyslop 880yds. 4 t h P.Rayment 1 mile 1st J.S.Evans

6th K.Wall 3 miles 4th D.Briggs 120 hurdles 3rd W.Melbourne 220 hurdles 2nd J.&Hyslop

6th A. L. Smith 440 hurdles 2nd J.T.Hyslop Long Jump 4th J . A. Hobson High Jump 5th V.Mslbourns Hop step & Jump 1st D.C.Smith Shot 4 t h J.H.S.Newman

Hammer 7th D. W. J . Mackenzie 2 mile walk 5th M.A.Clarke 3000m steepleo/s 4th D. Thomas Pole Vault 5th A.W.Smith

A.W.SKITH KOUT.TIKG THE POLE.

REGATTAS

The regatta season has started. On Saturday, Hay 11th. the 2nd. VIII had some hard luck when they lost the Junior Eights f i n a l at Putney Regatta. Having beaten Thames Tradesmen and London Transport by.4 lengths, and Putney town R.C. by length. The I.C- crew raced Vesta R.C. i n the f i n a l . This resulted i n a dead heat and a re-row was neccesary. The I.C. crew was un­fortunately too spent and lost by 7 length. I t was excellent racing and we should soon have our revenge.

Tha third eight had a close race i n their Maiden eights event. They lost by s i x feet from Parksids and Lensbury. Parkside bad previously beaten I.C. by two lengths at Hammersmith, so t h i s showed an improvement for the less ex­perienced crew.

Martin Gaylord. sculling the Junior-Senior Sculls f i n a l had a bad start i n the rough water and l o s t four lengths a distance.

.Cm Ray 25th. U.L .B.C. w i l l hold their regat­ta. I.C. hope to sweep the board clean so come and support your crews.