Along With Success Comes Jealousy & Envy

“Will Human Resources Protect Us?”

William Allan Kritsonis, PhD

• “As we climb the career ladder there will always be someone waiting to push us off”

Everywhere we go in life there will be someone who:

• Is Smarter & Who’s Spouse is Smarter• Is Richer (or appears to be)• Who has a better job• Is Prettier or More Handsome• Has a bigger house, a fancier car• Kids are Cuter, Smarter • Has a better personality, has more

friends and on and on…………..

According to Yale University..

• “One in Five murders occur because of jealousy or envy.”

• Keep in mind there may be some people who want to see us fail in this program

Human Resources (HR) Past

• Handle issues dealing with humans.

• Counseled employees on appropriate and fair treatment.

• Terminate employees who were a pain for everyone to get along with.

• Recognize and respond to jealousy and mistreatment especially by supervisors

Human Resources Now

• Hires and processes terminations. • Instead of dealing with the issue at hand,

documentation has to be made.• Makes fearful decisions avoiding a law suit

(While allowing disgruntled employees to stay)

• Tend to move the problems from school to school and only respond aggressively to extreme cases– (child molestation, murders, etc.) or the media

You are Your Best Defense

• Be ready to identify the preliminary jealousy signs.

• Usually the person starts asking lots of questions… the more you answer the more they ask.

Inappropriate Questions to Ask and to Be Asked (laying the jealousy foundation):

• Any “How Much” questions

• Or any questions that do not benefit the good of the whole. – What does your husband or wife do?– Where do you live?– What year did you finish college?– How much do you get paid?

• Anything “Nosey”

What is a Tactful Response to These Question?

• Why do you ask?

• General statement- – Example- What does your husband do?

• “He works in the city.” and be silent, and silent..

Why are People Jealous in the Workplace?

• Struggling Under-Achievers

• Low Self Esteem

• Insecure

• Feel threatened

• Incompetent

• Fear of Exposure of having a lack of knowledge

In Order to be Successful We….

• Must develop strategies to handle jealousy– Discover what the person is good at and

praise them at their talent.– Acknowledge we cannot change others and

regardless of what we do, it may not be enough

– Must remain positive in the work place and picture ourselves as always being “on stage”

How do we handle jealousy?

• Off-set Jealousy with Modesty:

Discover who you can share your joys with and tell those persons, others will think we are bragging and would prefer to hear bad news anyway.

Ways of Being Modest (makes being jealous harder)

• Use your first name and not any titles when appropriate

• Don’t take every advantage to show how intelligent you are.

• Come across as a team player – Do not say: ”This was all my idea and if it weren’t

for me..”

• Empower others and lead as a transformational leader who wants other to exceed.

In Conclusion….

• Human Resources must recognize the existence of jealousy and envy in the work place and make fair, consistent, timely decisions.