NATIONAL SERVICE SCHEMESri Venkateswara College

JULY 2020

कायाकायाpresents

BODY SHAMING: A Scar on Mental Health

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BODY SHAMINGA Scar on Mental Health

“You are so fat….”

“So thin… Skinny chap!”“So much hair on your body. Get waxing done

please! You look horrible!”“Go to a gym. Build muscles .

Be macho , man!”

Do you get to hear anything of this sort?Anything that makes you question yourbody type/size? Any comments on yourheight, weight, body, appearance mightmake you feel humiliated and if so, youknow then, you are being body shamed!

The sad part is, most of us buy them andcurse our very own existence or try andbring about a change in the way we look,only to fit into the “beauty standards” setin by the society.

In the words of Rae Smith, "There isnothing wrong with your body, but there isa lot wrong with the messages which tryto convince you otherwise".

Body Shaming is the sad reality of themodern world. It is known as the action orpractice of expressing humiliation aboutanother individual’s body shape or size; aform of bullying that can result in severeemotional trauma, especially at a youngage. Body shaming can be done byanyone- parents, siblings, friends,schoolmates or even social media. It mocksand stigmatizes its victims, tearing downself-respect and perpetuating the harmfulidea that our unique physical appearancesshould be compared to air-brushed notionsof ‘perfection’. All genders may be subjectto body shaming but as trends see it,women are more vulnerable.

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In a society surrounded by filteredpictures,videos and the social media thatwe idolize, body image concerns continueto be on the rise. 96%  people worldwidewant to change their body in some waywhich shows this is not an individualproblem of low self-esteem but rather acollective disconnect with how we see ourbody-image. Girls and women areespecially bombarded with images of so-called 'perfect' bodies. Failure to achieveperfect body standards can cause low selfesteem, feelings of unworthiness, eatingdisorders, body dysmorphia, and can affectthe mental and emotional well being of anindividual by causing anxiety, or evendepression. A person who struggles with aneating disorder is influenced by manydifferent factors, including biological andenvironmental factors, and body shamingcan be a part of that equation.

There is an established notion. They say, athin, 'conventionally pretty' woman is whatall women should strive for and thatanything outside that realm isn't valued orworthy. To conform to the ‘ideal shape ofbody’ or what the society refers to asbeautiful,  is like choosing to spend yourentire life being at war with your ownbody. Body Shaming or body loathing andimage negativity is a universal problemthat we are all dealing with. In this worldwhere every 3 seconds a child is dyingbecause of hunger, THAT is a tragedy,someone telling you you’re fat is not, yourbald patches are not, your stretch marksare not! The society which tries to fill allof us in a narrow mould built by itsnarrow mindset is the biggest misfortunewe all are battling against day and night.

THE REAL PROBLEM

03It’s not that body shaming alone causeseating disorders, but it can amplify thethoughts. It triggers the same kinds ofthoughts that are driving the eatingdisorder.

So many people across the planet arebeing anchored down by the negative anddark passenger inside their heads thatsays, “You are not good enough!” and it'shard to navigate life with this inner voicethat is a result of noises from outside.

WHY DO PEOPLE Body Shame?

People love to notice their environment. It isonly natural to glance at what goes around-people, the building, the road etc. But it’snot normal to draw a comparison with others'features referring to their physical attributes.Nowadays people, especially teenagers havebeen badly misconstructed with the idea ofbeauty. Being slim, fair and tall seems likethe symbolic characteristics of a perfectperson. Lacking such futile parameters makesthem feel low about their own self. Thisnegative outlook perpetuates in the form ofshaming their own self, or of others as well.Body shaming can manifest in several ways.It could be brought into action by criticizingone’s own self or by criticizing others infront of them or without them knowing. Thisis an innate conflict that seems to have abitter expression. People are usually convincedwith the opinions of others if it highlightssome aspects or attributes that they do notpossess. Whilst the other times, bodyshaming is targeted for fun. People like theseusually pass judgements vaguely withoutrealizing the impact it can cause on thebeholder. They feel authoritative in doing soand mostly are motivated by the peers. As amatter of fact, this type of attitude is alsomotivated by the social stigma that iscreated by the people of the samecommunity. What might commence as anormal mockery, can amplify exponentially tosomething harsh and can hit a persondifferently in all aspects inducing self-doubtand other dilemmas.It is also possible thatone’s outlook might change after anunhealthy social interaction where the young,imbecile children reflect their own ideas in avery childish way. Such children are usuallymistaken with the idea of beauty andperfection. Social media also has a majorcontribution in cultivating such thoughts.

Lack of proper understanding shall onlyperpetuate this thought with a ripple effect.When people idolize other people, theyincline to follow their values and opinionswithout putting much thought into it. Ifsomething is poorly manipulated, then it cancause confusion or induce an insecuritywithin the person and will also be poorlydisplayed as some aspect of the behaviorthat might make someone feel bad aboutthemselves. The types of commercials thatpromote fitness, sometimes also highlightthe aspects of a particular body frame andpeople start thinking if it’s the onlymanifestation of an ideal body. Lack ofinteraction with the parents as well is afactor amplifying this concern. Without aproper understanding since the verybeginning would only solidify this thoughtand would reflect in future. Anothereminent effect as to why people bodyshame is due to lack of acceptance. We allare perfect in our own ways. We need notrely on the opinions of others rather ourown self. The definition of beauty mightvary infront of other people but to feel badabout it or making someone feel bad is aconsent given by self. Every time you try tomould into someone else’s picture of anideal body, you are slipping away from yourown confidence which is what you actuallyshould reflect in the first place. This formof critical thinking takes time, but whenone will imbibe it, the world and theenvironment around would start hittingdifferently.

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How does the

promote body shaming?ENTERTAINMENT INDUSTRYWe have danced on the beats of a numberof songs, whether in marriages or parties,we never really showed our concern for thelyrics. But it happened to us when we cameacross the word, Body Shaming, that theentertainment industry fitted just right intoour “blame” bracket. We all know howhyper-sexualised music videos receivethousands of likes on social media. It isimportant to note the popular culture ofpromoting such music by hitting the likebutton and letting such songs top the musiccharts is what fosters the problem of bodyshaming. Also, the many awards received bysuch artists whose lyrics aren’t paid muchattention about. Why is it that the femaleartists are shown either twerking, ordancing in a seductive way in the only itemsong of every movie. Are the womenwatching supposed to idealise the figure onthe television and assume to please a guyonly if she looks as much desiring and‘sexy’ as the female artists are shown inthose songs?

It is not the only instance where bodyshaming can be witnessed. Another onebeing the movies such as Bala (2019) orUjda Chaman (2019), both of which basedtheir stories on similar grounds of baldpeople. Sadly, it didn’t seem to deliver amessage which it intended to. The twomovies did not seem to reflect a sensiblehumour and left the targeted audiencerather much more humiliated and in disgust.

Well, Bollywood has a long history in fat-shaming women in films. All bollywood fansmust be well aware about Tun Tun (Originalname, Uma Devi Khatri), a fat woman whowas cast in films only for comic scenes andwas shamed ruthlessly.

In other movies like, Chori Chori ChupkeChupke (2001), Raj (Salman Khan)mistakes Priya’s (Rani Mukerji) sister-in-law as the girl his family has chosen forhim. He fat-shames her by calling her“chaar bachon ki maa”.

In Kal Ho Naa Ho (2003), Sweetu (DelnaazIrani), was unabashedly shamed for wearingtight fitted dresses and going on dates. Shewas responded to by her friend Naina(Preity Zinta) who tells her that she willnever be able to please a guy if she doesn’tlose weight. If on the other side we takeDum Laga Ke Haisha (2015), which is abeautiful story about a plump girl, at nopoint mocks overweight people and ratherencourages the importance of self love andacceptance.The conclusion of the entire passage comesdown to a simple message: embrace yourselfmore than you embrace the lead charactersin films, for they might not always standup to your expectations, when thefilmmakers add their cynical sense ofhumour.

05

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Take the case of RiyaDasgupta (Name Changed),she is a normal collegestudent who has faced BodyShaming throughout her childand teen years: "As a child, Isuffered from a few intestinalissues as a result of which Ihad a lot of scars and markson my face when I reachedclass 2. My classmates usedto look at me as if they werelooking at a bin. They wereafraid to touch me or sit withme due to the fear that Imight infect them. Everyonecares about themselves first,right? As I grew up, I had toface the world with aninferiority complex. Meetingrelatives meant being told toapply a lot of medicines andcosmetics with not even aminor effect. I felt that I hadto live to please the world….aworld which didn't even acceptme".

"I was in eight standard and itwas around lunch time that afew friends of mine approachedme and asked to accompanythem to the canteen. While wewere on the way, I heard mybest friend talking about mybody proportions in a negativemanner . She was telling myclassmate that if I wereslimmer and taller , I wouldhave fetched double theattention at school. That dayhence , up till 12th grade, Ihad major self esteem issues. Iskipped eating meals atbirthday parties, avoided everysort of junk food till I felt likeI could be perfect. Eventuallymy psychology teacher whohappens to be really close tome, made me realise how I wasmisguided with the idea ofperfection. It took me sometime to imbibe but now I amcomfortable with what I am.

Body Shaming is not justsomething about women. It's astigma and a problem that istoo severe for males as well.For Shivam *(Name Changed),it was a trauma of a reality:"Iwas a really lean and shortguy. When I was a child, myparents thought I might gainsome height as I grew. But itwas a worthless hope. I stillam short even though I'vegained weight. Being a manmeans being tall andmuscular. And till date, I tryas much as I can to grow myheight. I thought of takingsteroids but couldn't gatherthe courage to. I've beengyming but that won't helpmy height, you know.  Andthe worst part is, my familyis afraid that I might not geta nice girl to marry justbecause of my height. Is itfair to judge someone throughthe scale of their height. Doesthat mean I have a shortcharacter or personality?"

HOW DO PEOPLE REACTTO BODY SHAMING?

Case StudiesBody Shaming isn't a very

"elite or glamorousphenomenon". It's crystallized inour reality and amongst people

we know.

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SURVEY ANALYSIS

07

Always

39.4% respondents stated that theirreaction is entirely dependent upon theperson from whom the comment came.16.6% chose to ignore the remarksaltogether whereas 13.1% decided to remainneutral. 11.3% respondents decided to standup for themselves and spoke against it.10.2% Felt ashamed and 9.4% were angryabout the comments being made.

69.1% of individuals accepted that theirappearance made them feel insecuresometimes. 19.8 % claimed that it nevermade them feel insecure meanwhile 11.1%of respondents stated that they havealways felt  insecure due to theirappearance.

For the major percentage of ourrespondents  social media,  movies andtelevision have the greatest impact on howthey view themselves. For some individualsmagazines, newspaper and video gameswere most impact while a small portion ofpeople attributed other factors like booksetc. as having the greatest impact.

For 55.6% of individuals,  spending moreand more time frequently on socialmedia,  sometimes made them feel worseabout the way they looked. 38.8% neverfelt this way whereas  5.7% always feltworse about their looks after spendingtime on social media.

Always

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Major percentage of respondents  believed body shape, weight and skin tone to be themost common factors that people are body shamed about. There were also individuals forwhom the most common factors for body shaming were height, facial features and bodyfeatures.

58.2% of respondents affirm thatthey rarely have been critical aboutothers appearance while 36.4%claim that they sometimesknowingly or unknowingly judgepeople on the basis of exterior looks.

63.8% of people haveaccepted that they havebeen given nicknames basedon their outer appearance.

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According to 32.3% respondents , theytook critical remarks about themselves asa joke , 26.3 % dealt with it confidently,17.2% people completely ignored it, asmaller percentage of 16.7 felt insecureabout themselves while 7.5% gave itback to critics.

42% people said that they will listen tothe advice given by the owner.26.9% feelthat they would prefer to ignore the adviceof shopkeeper and forget about it .14.4%people think they will listen to advice ofowner while 6.8% of people think to leavethe place is the best they can do!

57.1% people accepted that they willappreciate their friends for gymming andworking on themselves . 23.2% will notreact at all and 17.9%  will get angry withtheir friends.

87.4% of individuals felt that the issueof body shaming should be addressedopenly at schools, colleges . A negligibleproportion thinks contrary.

Out of the 459 responses received, the maximum responses are filled by youth in the age of 19which accounts for 37.7%. The second highest response was filled by youth in the age of 20 which

accounts for 24.6% followed by 22.7% including youth of age group 19. Around 5.7% of the totalresponse came from age group 17.The least responses came from age group 21 , 22 and 23.

Females outnumbered the males in filling the responses making it 60.1% of the total response whilemales filled 39.7% of the total response. Also the other gender constituted 1%.

Will listen to the advice given bythe owner

Will stop buying clothes fromthat shop

Will express whatever I feel tothe owner directly

Discuss this with my family

Ignore the advice and forgetabout it

Will leave the shop

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HOW TO DEAL WITH THE PROBLEM?

In our society, it’s difficult to love your body without effort, and it can take many years of workto get there. There are many challenges to face before one feels compassion, acceptance, andultimately love for their body.There is a societal body-shaming that is so ingrained that it canfeel like the truth. But it’s not the truth. You don’t have to change your body to be deservingof showing it off how everybody else likes.The following tips will help you in your journeytowards overcoming shameful feelings about your body:

2. Believe you can love your body When you deny that you can feel better about yourself as you are and insist that none of thetips in this article can work for you, and therapy won’t help either, and so on, you ensure thatyou’re right. When you can recognize that you’re condemning yourself to being stuck, you canstart to have a choice as to whether or not you really want to be. Perhaps you don’t want tocondemn yourself to misery for the rest of your life. Perhaps you want to give yourselfpermission to see if you can feel better and begin the journey of figuring out how to make ithappen. Believing in yourself is one way—perhaps the biggest way—to get out of your ownway.Twitter feeds.

3. Create an inner-supporterOnce you’re aware of your critical thoughts and how deeply you’re harming yourself with

them, you might want to stop doing this to yourself. One way to stop doing this is tocreate an inner-supportive part of yourself to step in when your inner-bully is trying to

steal the show. Stand in front of the mirror and speak out loud what you want to believeabout yourself. Use “I” statements. You might say something like, “I am beautiful,” or “I

am strong,” or “I love myself as I am.”4. Practice thanking your bodyIt’s hard to be grateful to your body when you’re ashamed of it, and youwish it were different. However, there are always things about your body tobe thankful for. Your body keeps you alive, your body carries you every day,and your body protects you in many ways. Your body has survived a lifetimeof events so far. Think about what your body does for you, instead of whatyou wish it did for you. Practice taking time to thank your body for all thatit does.

1. Choose your messages on social media platformsIntentionally surround yourself with messages that promote body-acceptance and self-love.

Doing this gives you power over the influx of overt and covert messages coming at you.Follow body-positive Instagram feeds, Facebook pages, and Twitter feeds.