BUSINESS WRITING- MEDIAZIONE
Dipartimento di Lingue e Letterature Straniere e
Culture Moderne
2ND year Triennale – L – 12
Writing Module and Exam Practice 2015 – 2016
General Writing Techniques.
Email writing: p. 6 - 10letters: p. 10 – 17reports: p. 17 – 18writing practice: p. 18 - 23Marking scheme & criteria p. 24 - 26
Shan Hirst
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General Writing Techniques.
Always consider the following:1. All business writing requires identification of its purpose.
Why are you writing this letter / report? what needs to be done?What’s the next step?
2. Be aware of the reader – they need to be clear about what you are saying and what they must do – so use ‘signposts’ ( eg. Next, furthermore, however).
3. Be clear, be brief.4. Choose words carefully. Why use several when one will do the job?5. Use a suitable register – is it an informal or neutral situation? Do you sound helpful and polite?6. Write in Paragraphs - i) introduction ii) main point 1 iii) main point 2, iv) summary / conclusion7. Topic sentences - Introduce a paragraph with a main statement .
The writing process: Always have a plan – it may take longer to plan writing a good letter than to physically write it. Steps in writing: i) Identify the purpose of the letterii) select & organise your pointsiii) 1st draft iv) assess draft & editv) final draft. Proof reading is vital! Remember that we often don’t spot our own mistakes. If it is not possible to
have someone else read your work, read it through later – never immediately after writing. Be aware of you own typical ‘typo’ or spelling errors and systematically look for them.
Think about structure: using correct register, spelling, grammar, punctuation, paragraphing. Task achievement. Have you included all the necessary information? Can there be an outcome
from the contents of your letter / report? Have you specified what the next step should be?Put yourself in the mind of the reader, don’t make assumptions about their knowledge. In other words, make sure all the information is there and that it is clear. What does the reader already know? What does the reader want or need to know? What is the reader’s attitude likely to be?
Points to bear in mind: Logic – sequence of sentences and tenses Sentence length – never too long, never more than one subordinate clause ( i.e. beginning with
‘however’, ‘also’ and other link words.) Writing styles – no slang or colloquialisms. Consider whether active or passive is most appropriate
and also reported speech ( use of conditional).Always be aware of effect – even the word order you use can change the emphasis.
Formality – In general ‘Latin’ words (affirm, conclude, demonstrate, discover ) suggest formality; shorter, often Germanic words, and phrasal verbs ( say, end, show, find out ) sound more conversational.
Practice A:Match up the verbs on the left with a more formal alternative. Then match each pair of verbs with a phrase on the right (in groups of 4) to make an expression.1.set up a .conduct 1.the problem of distribution2. carry out b. investigate 2. a sister company in Hamburg3. strengthen c. establish 3. our position in South America4. look into d. consolidate 4. more research in this area5. buy e. relocate 1. the possibility of selling direct6. think about f. purchase 2. our headquarters to Lyon
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7. move g. amalgamate 3. our raw materials at source8. combine h. explore 4. the two departments9. show i. penetrate l. the development of new products10. work out j. accelerate 2. the importance of the project11. speed up k. calculate 3. new markets in Eastern Europe12. break into l. demonstrate 4. exactly what our margins are13. pay m. collaborate 1. the goods within the month14. send n. exploit 2. staff according to performance15. work together o. remunerate 3. our cross-cultural expertise16. make use of p. dispatch 4. on the design of the product17. use q. formulate 1. all our resources18.build in r. capitalise on 2. several new product features19. think up s. incorporate 3. the new opportunities in the CIS20. take advantage of t. utilise 4. an immediate change of plan
Clarity.Use plain English.Short sentences are better: 15 – 20 words are ideal ( we can retain 15 – 20 words in our short-term memory for up to 30 seconds).Avoid repetitionUse active rather than passivee.g. ‘an improvement has been made in quality’ = ‘quality has improved’ √Avoid unnecessary wordsquite unique; absolutely impossible, at this moment in time, ( better just ‘unique’, ‘impossible’ and ‘now’)Negative statements are harder to follow than positive ones:It is not without hesitation that I advise … ( better: I hesitate to advise..)Make sure that it is clear which nouns your pronouns are replacingYesterday the letter landed on my desk so I burned it. ( the desk or the letter?)Avoid incorrect grammar - verbs, tenses incorrect pronouns e.g please call my secretary or myself X (me√ ); me X and my accountant ( my
accountant and I (√) would like…; They saw the manager and I X ( and me √) Sentence structure usually consists of Subject – Verb - Object. Common spelling and punctuation errors. Correct these – Practice B.i) The company payed a good salaryii) There are not going to achieve this targetsiii) There are to many problems with this scheme,iv) Its not going to be possiblev) The sales manager spoke to the costumers
Finally, never use words whose exact meaning you do not know. Always check in a dictionary and / or thesaurus. – except in the exams!
Key to Practice A above:1 – c – 2 ; 2 – a – 4 ; 3 – d – 3 : 4 – b – 1 ; 5 – f – 3 ; 6 – h – 1 ; 7 – e – 2 ; 8 – g – 4 , 9 – l – 2 ; 10 – k – 4 ;11 – j – 1 ; 12 – i – 3 ; 13 – o – 2 ; 14 – p – 1 ; 15 – m – 4 ; 16 – n . 3 ; 17 – t – 1 ; 18 – s – 2 ; 19 – q – 4 20 – r – 3Key to Practice B above:i) paid ii) They – these iii) too iv) It’s v) customers
Punctuation.Match the following uses with the appropriate punctuation.
1. Full stop . a. to show quoted comments; for titles of books, plays, ships; to indicate special meanings of a word; to enclose words or phrases being defined.
2. Question mark ? b. to mark the end of a sentence unless a question or exclamation mark is
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used; in abbreviations.3. Exclamation mark ! c. to separate an opening expression from what follows; to avoid ambiguity; to
show a natural pause; to separate items in a list.4. Comma , d. to indicate the start of a list or series of ideas; before an explanation; to
show a contrast with what has gone before. N.B: A comma cannot go where a full stop is possible.
5. Brackets ( ) e. to insert an ‘aside’ into a sentence.6. Colon : f. to link different ideas in one sentence; before explanatory phrases introduced
by words like ‘for example’ ‘that is’ or ‘namely’7. Semicolon ; g. to indicate missing letters; to form plurals of abbreviations that have full
stops; to show ownership.8. Apostrophe ‘ h. to show emphasis; to indicate a break ; to identify a part of a sentence
which is separate from the main theme.9. Dash -- i. to help pronunciation where a prefix creates a double letter; with combined
words; to help prevent ambiguity; to link words; with prefixes; when the end of a line splits a word (from the suffix).
10. Hyphen - j. to show an answer is expected at the end of a sentence.11. Inverted commas “ ” k. to show emotion or urgency
Some examples.Inverted commas ( either single or double). Some ‘colloquialisms’ are really slang.My boss said, “I will never resign.”HyphenPre-conceived ideas; a real know-it-all; the London – Brighton route.ApostropheJim and Maria’s house; John’s car; it’s raining outside; My sisters’ boyfriends.DashWe travelled by camel - incredibly uncomfortable – all through the desert.It’s very difficult – so I hear!Colon (**limit your use of this! English uses colons very rarely – in contrast to Italian)Bring the following items: hammer, spanner, nails, screwdriver …Business here has been good: in Asia it has been very slow.BracketsGeoff Banks ( the Human Resources Director) wants to see you tomorrow.SemicolonShe was excited by the proposal; however …It is easy to see the similarity; anyone can tell they are twins.Exclamation mark Warning!CommaAlthough I like him, I really don’t think that he is a good actor.It’s a terrible film. However, I liked the book.It’s available in black, white, and red.The girls, who were all sisters, were always together.Question mark: Who are you?Full stopThis is the end of the sentence.
Writing Tasks.The first thing you should do when you are given a writing task is think:
WHO are you writing to? What is the PURPOSE of your piece of writing (asking for information, making a complaint, giving an
apology etc)? What TYPE of text are you writing( a letter – an email- a memo )?
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How many pieces of INFORMATION should you include? What STYLE should you use? (Remember who you are writing to)
Writing Checklist.Content and style.
Is your answer the right length? The short task will usually tell you the maximum number of words – stick to them! On the other hand, the letter should be just long enough to include all the required information clearly, in a suitable style.
You will lose marks if you don’t include all the required content points. Is everything you say clear? Is your style appropriate to the question (e.g. formal or informal)? Is your style consistent (e.g. no informal words or contractions in a formal letter / report and no
formal phrases or endings in an informal situation)? Will your writing have the effect you want on your reader? (And would your boss be happy with it?) Have you used correct lay-out (letter, report, email etc) and does it look professional?
Organisation. Have you divided your answer into paragraphs? Do they look like paragraphs (e.g. double space
between one and the other)? Does each paragraph have ONE main idea which is appropriate to what you are writing? Are the paragraphs in a logical order? Have you used linking expressions to connect the ideas between the paragraphs (e.g. However, In
addition etc)?Language.
Have you made sure your language is correct? Have you included a range of grammatical structures? Have you used a range of vocabulary and is your vocabulary specific (e.g. to make an appointment/
complaint, to contact suppliers, to complain about something etc)? Have you used time expressions appropriately (e.g. when, after, as soon as I do something – not
future tense)? Is your handwriting easy to read? Are your spelling and punctuation correct? Have you checked for mistakes which you typically often make?
Short E-MAILS
I. FORMAL / INFORMAL Match these excerpts so that they make 2 separate emails.
1. A. Thank you very much for your email of 10 November. I was delighted to hear about your visit to this country. I am writing to invite you to attend our conference. B. It was great to hear from you and I’m really pleased you’re coming to visit us. I hope you’ll stay with us – We’ve go loads of room.
2. A. Why don’t you give me a ring when you get here? B. May I suggest that you phone me upon arrival?
3. A. I look forward to meeting you.
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B. I’m really looking forward to seeing you again.
4. A. If you need further information please contact immediately. B. Let me know if there’s anything else you’d like to know.
5. A. Best regards.B. Speak soon.
II. BEGINNING & ENDING. 1. Which of these is appropriate to finish an email?
a. Best. b. Thanks c. Kisses d. Yours faithfully e. Bye for now f. Regards g. Love h. C U L8R i. Sincerely
2. Which of these is appropriate to tell the reader what the email is about?
a. Subject: b. Object: c. Re: d. Complaint e. Response to the invitationf. Apologise for the impossibility to come to the studio opening. g. Apology
key:1. a b (d) e f g i (never c!)2. a c d g
III. MODALS IN E-MAILS.
Choose the correct word.
1. That shall / should be possible.2. Can / Shall you give me some product information ?3. Do you think you could / would send me some more details please?4. I will / would appreciate your suggestions.5. Let me know what time would / should suit you best.6. I will / would be grateful if you could / should give me some information about …7. We should / would be prepared to give you a discount if …8. That might / would be possible. Let me get in touch with my boss.9. I’m sorry we couldn’t / wouldn’t use your agency for the advertising this year.10. How do you think we shall / should deal with this?11. I think we need to have / would have second thoughts about this.12. I could / can assure you that we have always had good feedback about our services.
IV. EDITING E-MAILS.
Correct the mistake(s) in each sentence.1. I’m sorry I haven’t contacted you for ages, but I been really busy.2.If you require any further informations, please do not hesitate to contact me.3. I’m afraid but we haven’t received your payment yet.4.I look forward to meet you next week.5. I will be grateful if you could send me some clarification about this.
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6. It will be better for me if we fix the appointment for early afternoon rather the morning.7. I am totally agree with you on this point.8. We will provide for the lunch and transport.9. At the meeting we will discuss on the following points.10.I would know something about your plans for the launch in the Spring.
Add the missing word in each phrase below.
1. If you like any more details, just let me know.2. I look forward to hearing you soon.3. With reference your enquiry, I’ve attached the information you need.4. I would appreciate if you could get back to me on this.5. What time would convenient for you?6. We are writing to inform that…7. We are able confirm that…8. I apologise the delay in your order.9. You only sent 100 units instead 150.10. I regret inconvenience we caused.
V. COMPLAINTS VIA E-MAIL.
Complete the emails of complaint with words from the box below.
1. I am writing to express my strong …………………. with the goods which were ……………………. today.2. I am writing to ………………………. about the ………………….. of the dress which I bought from your catalogue.3. I am writing in …………………….. with the poor service and negative ……………………… of your holiday reps.4. Amazingly, my order has still not been ……………………, despite 3 phone calls to say that it is needed ………………………….. .5. I expect a full ………………………. , or else I will be forced to take the matter …………………………… 6. ………………….. the goods arrive by Friday, I am afraid we will have to ……………………….. the order.7. I would ……………………… it if the damaged goods could be ……………………… by return of post.8. I think that I should be …………………………. to a …………………………… .
complain dissatisfaction delivered entitled received quality refund unless further appreciate connection replaced attitude cancel urgently replacement
Complete these typical phrases.To write in co……………………………………. with something.To need something ur………………………….To express strong dis ……………………………… with something.To demand an immediate re………………………..To take the matter f……………………………To cause somebody great inc………………………………….
Complete these sentences.1. You only sent 3 books instead …2. You only sent 3 books in spite of ………………..3. Even though I paid for 4 books, ………….4. I paid for 4 books;5. I paid for 4 books,
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VI. APOLOGIES. Complete these typical phrases.1. Please accept my ……………………………..2. I can assure you that ………………………….3. I apologise again ………………………………4. We are sending you a small gift ………………..5. I’ll look into the matter urgently and ………………………….6. Thank you for bringing ………………………………………...7. Can you leave it ………………………………….?8. I assure you we are doing everything we can to ……………………….
VII. quiz.1. What does cc mean at the top of an email?2. What is the difference between cc and bcc/ Ccn ? Where can you find bcc / Ccn?3. In Italian it says ‘oggetto’. What is the English for this? Is it always necessary to fill in this section? Why or why not?4. What does ‘Re’ mean? and where do you sometimes find it?5. Should the subject line be a full sentence? What makes a good subject line?
Find the answers after the ‘Useful phrases section below’.
VIII. USEFUL PHRASES.
Informal Neutral Contact Hi / Hello Jon
Jon, …. ( or no name at all)Dear Ms…..Dear Jon
Introduction Thanks for your email.Re your email
Thank you for your email.
Reason for email I’m writing about …Just writing to say …I got your name from …
I am writing in connection with …
Your name was given to me by…Attachments I’ve attached …
Here’s the attachment re …Please find attached …I am sending you … in xl
Asking for information I’d like to know…Please send me…
Can you tell me something about …
I would like to knowI’m interested in receiving information about …Could you give me some information about…
Giving information Just to say…Glad to say …Unfortunately …
I’m writing to let you know that…I am pleased to say that …I regret to inform you that …
Requests (Please) Could you …Can you let me have …Thanks for your help.
I’d be grateful if you could …I wonder if you could …Thank you in advance for your help.
Offering Shall I …?Do you want me to …?Let me know if you want me to …
Would you like me to …?
Do get in touch if you would like me to …
Promising action I’ll …I’ll look into itI’ll get back to you on this asap
I’ll find out about the situationI will contact you about this shortly
Conclusion Thanks again for …Let me know if you need anything else.
Thank you again for your help.If you require any further information / help do not hesitate to get in touch
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If you have further questions just let me know
Please feel free to contact me if you need anything else.
Close Speak to / See you soonLooking forward to …(…ing you)Best wishesBye for now/ All the best
Best wishesI am looking forward to…( …ing)
Regards Arranging a meeting When should we meet?
When would suit you?How about …day at (time)?Are you free sometime this week?
When would be convenient for you?Would ….. be convenient?Could we meet on …. at ….?
Availability Any time in p.m. is OK for meI’m free on …Sorry I can’t make it on …
I am available in the afternoon…day would be fine for meI’m afraid I can’t manage …
Close See you in (Milan) on (Thursday) I look forward to seeing you on Thursday
*This work on emails has been adapted from material in ‘email English’, Paul Emmerson, Macmillan, 2004 which is highly recommended for students wishing to improve this type of written English.
Answers to email quiz.1. It means ‘carbon copy’ and you use it to copy in somebody else who will receive your email.2. It means ‘blind carbon copy’. It is found under ‘cc’ and you use it when you want to send someone a copy of the email, but you don’t want the other recipients to know about this copy! Copia conoscenza nascosta3. The English is ‘Subject’. The subject line must ALWAYS be filled in or it is likely your email will not be read or will go immediately in the spam.4. ‘Re’ is sometimes found in the subject line and it means ‘Regarding….’5. No, not a full sentence. Your subject line should be very short and very clear and should tell the reader the most important point of the email.
IX. Writing Practice – now you write.
1. You want to change the date of a meeting for the second time. Write an email.2. You want some information about a company’s product or service. Write to them.3. You wish to change a hotel booking.4. You want to arrange to see a friend of yours. Make a suggestion.
NOTICE:Letters are now frequently sent by email. To do this, you use the same layout as for emails, but the style and way of writing is exactly the same as for letters. (See below)
Letters.
(Comments on business exam. September 2002)
1. Activity:You are a Logistics Manager of DHL Deliveries International, based at 16 Park Way, Oxford, OX 69 FG. You have been invited to give a talk at this year’s International Transport and Distribution Conference, which is going to be held in Glasgow in November. The event is being organised by Organizers Ltd., of Go House, 66-68 Walnut Way, Watford, Herts. WF 69 HJ. You agree to the time and the date they suggest in their letter, but have reservations about certain points they mentioned or neglected to mention.
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Speaker fee: Travel expenses: Handouts, notes for
delegates:
Equipment:
Text of talk:
Organizers’ letter£350not mentionedspeaker to provide
overhead projector
full text to organizers one month in advance
Your view£500air travel, taxis, hotels, mealsneed to photocopy them at conference site (too heavy to carry)
OK to project from computer
outline plan only (never write a full text)
Write an appropriate and adequate letter in reply to their invitation. The person at Organizers Ltd who wrote to you is Ms Lina Mayhew, the Speaker Organizer.2. Approach.A: Structure.Before writing your answer, you should list on rough paper the points which you wish to make, and then decide how many paragraphs to have and which points should be in each. For example, many letters have this structure:-
!st paragraph – Reason for writing. 2nd, 3rd, 4th paragraphs – Main points
The key messages of the letter, with one paragraph per key point. Last paragraph – The next step.
e.g. I hope that this proposal meets your requirements. I suggest that I give you a call within the next week to discuss this further. In the meantime…
B: Layout.There are many acceptable variations on letter presentation, and some that are quite simply wrong. We suggest the following points of layout, and indicate acceptable variations.
This can be spread across the top DHL Deliveries Int.
of the page, or else on the right. 16, Park Way, Oxford. OX 69 FG.Your ref: Not necessarily compulsory.Our ref:19th September 2002. Other formats are possible. The date may also
be placed below the sender’s address if it is on the right.Ms L. MayhewSpeaker Organiser Go House 66 – 68 Walnut Way WatfordHerts. WF 69 HJ
Dear Ms, Mayhew, Subject line is underlined ( probably without the use of Subject or Re: )
Invitation to talk at Int. Transport & Distribution Conf.
Thank you for … The paragraphs all begin at the left margin without indentation but with block spacing.
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Yours sincerely, Yours sincerely if you use the addressee’s name, Yours faithfully if you begin Dear Sirs. Some variations are acceptable (e.g. US - Sincerely yours).
Erica Collins Signature
E. Collins Writer’s name printed. You may add Mr or Mrs or Ms in brackets after the name.
Logistics Manager Writer’s job title, underlined or in brackets.
c.c. As appropriate.Enc.
C. Appropriate Tone.The situation should tell you whether the letter is to a friend or to a stranger, and whether it should be warm or rather formal. This means, before you write, considering the impact that we want the letter to have on the other person. Often the tone of the letter has more impact than the actual content! If it is a letter of apology, we must actually say that we are ‘very sorry indeed’, rather than trying to be too brisk and businesslike. Many candidates seem afraid of seeming ‘too human’ in a business letter, and consequently write in a rather impersonal, even aggressive style.
3. Model Answer.DHL Deliveries International
16, Park WayOxford. OX 69 FG
16th September 2014.
Ms. L. MayhewSpeaker OrganiserGo House, 66 – 68 Walnut WayWatford, Herts. WF 9 HJ
Dear Ms Mayhew,
International Transport & Distribution Conference
Thank you very much for your kind invitation to speak at the above Conference in Glasgow in November.
The time and date you suggest are in fact quite feasible for me, I am pleased to say. However, there are a few other points which I would like to raise.
Regarding the speaker’s fee, I think that a rate of £750, in addition to air travel, taxis, meals and accommodation would be more appropriate, and hope that you can agree to these terms.
As regards the full text you requested one month before the Conference, I should point out that my intention was to speak from notes instead, as I never use a full text. Could I therefore submit to you an outline plan of the presentation?
Concerning equipment, I note that you provide a data projector, so we can project my power point presentation. In addition, owing to the number of handouts which I intend to distribute, I would appreciate the use of a photocopier at the Conference venue, prior to my talk.
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I do hope that the above points are acceptable, and would appreciate confirmation from you as soon as it is convenient. Many thanks once again for your invitation to what will be, I am sure, a successful and stimulating Conference.
Yours sincerely,E. Collins.
E. Collins(Logistics Manager)
4. Comments on Model Answer.A. Format:These marks are given for correct positioning of addresses, use of appropriate formulae ( here Dear Ms Mayhew, and Yours sincerely), date, writer’s name and job title, and so on. This model answer follows the guidelines closely, and would gain full marks in this section.B. Language Correctness:Points are available for vocabulary and spelling, grammar, syntax and punctuation. In this manner, the vocabulary (feasible, appropriate, submit) is well used and correctly spelt, and there are no grammatically-related errors. Notice the words and phrases used ( in italics) to introduce a subject.C. Content and Appropriate Tone:Content – All the points raised in the question are included. Note the use of clear paragraphing. One paragraph for the financial aspect ( fee and expenses), one for the text, and one for the equipment. The subject of each paragraph is announced with clear signals such as Regarding, Concerning, As regards.Tone – Tone is well handled here in two ways: The writer knows that she is going to raise difficulties for Ms Mayhew in her main paragraphs. She
therefore begins in an appreciative way (‘Thank you very much for your kind invitation’), and is sure to make a positive point (agreement on time and dates ) first. She ends the letter with an expression of enthusiasm, almost a compliment, all of which puts her other paragraphs in a more positive context.
In order not to seem too direct, the writer uses conditional tenses in expressions such as , …would be more appropriate, Could I therefore rather than I think, is right and Can I. The very polite use of do in I do hope (last paragraph) is another example of ‘packaging’ a point to make its presentation acceptable to the other person.
This is an excellent answer – 20 / 20
5. Second Answer.
DHL Deliveries International16 Park Way, Oxford.
19/9/14 Speaker Organiser, GoHouse
66 - 68 Walnut Way Watford
Subject: Invitation to Conference.
Dear Ms Mayhew,
Thank you for the invitation, but I think that the fee is too low. I always ask £750, you should pay travel expenses too. And I would need to use a photocopier for all the handouts. I’m glad I can project my presentation.
I can send an outline plan of my talk if you want. I never use a full text. Otherwise, time and dates OK.
I remain at your disposal for further informations.
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Yours faithfully,E. Collins
Logistics Director.
6. Comments on Second Answer.A. Format: - Poor. This would gain no marks for this section.Errors here include: Sender’s address should be central, or on the right. Addressee’s address should be on the left margin. Addressee’s name and job title should be with the address. The subject line should simply be underlined, and after ‘Dear Ms Mayhew’. Here it looks like a memo. The paragraphing is not used to separate or group the points intelligently. Yours faithfully should be Yours sincerely, as Ms Mayhew’s name is used. After the signature there should be the name of the writer His job title should be underlined or in brackets. B. Language Correctness – Rather weak.The spelling is correct, as the writer mainly uses words in the question. One error is ‘informations’.Some grammatical errors: The second sentence is in fact two sentences run together. the next sentence begins ‘And’. the ‘sentence’ beginning ‘Otherwise’ has no verb.C. Content & Appropriate Tone – Weak.Content: ‘Travel expenses’ could be specified. the writer mentions most of the points in the question, but only in reference to what she wants and not to
Ms Mayhew’s offer.Tone: Very abrupt! The thanks are rather brief, and the question of the fee is raised in the first sentence! The language is too direct: I always ask , you should pay, if you want. Compared to the model answer, the pronoun I is used much more. This gives an egocentric impression. The sentence beginning ‘ I remain … ‘ is a memorized expression which seems ridiculous here because it
clashes with the tone of the rest of the letter, and in fact one can imagine little information that might be needed.
7. Summary of Common Errors.Incorrect layout in terms of position of addresses, dates, subject line, names and titles of sender and addressee. Wrong use of formulae (i.e. confusion of Yours sincerely and Yours faithfully). Failure to use paragraphs to separate major points (or to group related points). Ungrammatical linking of two sentences. Misspelling of vocabulary printed on the question paper. Introduction of memorized expressions which are not appropriate in the context. Abrupt style, through absence of conditional verbs, overuse of I, or extreme vocabulary such as
‘impossible’. Forgetting that the relationship created with the person receiving the letter is as important as the content,
and that expressions of thanks, humour, confidence or optimism can help make a difficult message acceptable.
8. Letter types:Decide on the purpose of the letter – bear it in mind throughout the writing process. Letter of enquiry: state purpose, give useful background ( reason, special circumstances, needs), state
what action or response is needed. Replying to enquiry: thank acknowledge query, give appropriate reply, refer to enclosures offer further
help, give contact details/names.
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Letter of complaint: briefly outline nature of complaint, give details (be specific), justify complaint, explain implications (danger, expense, inconvenience), state what action wanted and deadline, indicate any further steps if necessary (do not threaten action you cannot take – in any case, threats are generally better left as last resort).
Replying to complaint: acknowledge receipt, express empathy and apologise as appropriate, give short explanation (do not place blame), state what action you can take, give contact details, name/s.
Letter of application: state job applied for, where found out about it, give details of current status eg. age, job, state educational standard (not details as will be in c.v.), state relevant experience in general terms, ask for consideration of your application and indication of when you can expect reply.
Letter of introduction / request: state your connection to organisation or person, and briefly state request, give full details of request, including reasons, state any time constraints, thank and give your contact details including times.
9. Useful phrases ( Skills for 1st Certificate – Writing, Macmillan)
Greeting Name unknown: Dear Sir/Madam,Name known: Dear Mr…/ Dear Mrs… / Dear Ms..+ surname
Reason for writing I am writing to … I am writing with regard to … I am writing on behalf of …
Asking questions I would be grateful if … I wonder if you could …. Could you …?
Referring to their letter /points As you stated in your letter, …. Regarding …/ Concerning …With regard to ….
Closing expressions If you require any further information, please do not hesitate to contact me.I look forward to hearing from you.
Signing off If Dear + name: Yours sincerely, If Dear Sir/ Madam: Yours faithfully(Dear + first name : Yours,)
name Your first name + surname printed clearly under your signature
10. Letters of Complaint.Sample letter.You recently visited a local sports centre and were dissatisfied with the service provided. You have decided to write to the manager.Carefully read this advertisement for the sports centre and the notes you have made. Write a letter to the manager, complaining about the service you received and suggesting improvements.
Newtown Sports CentreNow in its third year, your sports centre offers A fully- equipped gym Professional staff A swimming pool Full-size tennis courts Lessons in many sportsSo, get your trainers on and come on down.
Practise your backstroke! Lose a few pounds! Newtown Sports Centre is the place to be!
Model.Your address
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The Manager, Address of Sports Centre. Date
Dear Sir/Madam,I am writing following a recent visit to the Newtown Sports Centre. I would like to express my disappointment with the service I received.
Although the staff were generally polite and helpful, they seemed to lack basic sports knowledge. None of them could offer any advice to me on choosing a tennis racket. I suggest that you send your employees on suitable training courses..
Another cause for complaint was that the swimming pool was closed. I understand that repairs and maintenance need to be carried out. However, when I called for information the day before my visit, the receptionist did not mention that the pool was closed. If I had known, I would have visited the sports centre at another time.
Finally, offering lessons in different sports is a good idea, but in my opinion they seem to be very expensive. Considering the membership fee, the prices of lessons should be lower, and more sports should be offered. I was disappointed that neither diving nor windsurfing was available.
I hope you will take these points into consideration. I look forward to hearing from you.
Yours faithfully,
Joe Bloggs.
11. Checklist.When you have written your letter, check:
It is a formal letter It includes all the information necessary You have asked all the questions you need to The questions are correctly formulated indirect questions The letter is divided into paragraphs You have checked the letter carefully for mistakes.12. Letters of Apology – more phrases.
The following phrases are useful when writing letters of apology (English for International Tourism , Longman)
Thank the person for bringing the matter to your attentionThank you for bringing this matter to our attention.
Express sympathyWe are very sorry to hear that…
Apologise if necessaryWe apologise for …
Please accept our apologies for …
State what action you will takePlease be assured that we will …
Remind the reader that his / her relationship with you is importantWe value your custom highly.
Your satisfaction is our priority. Make a goodwill gesture if appropriate
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Please find enclosed a voucher for …
REPORT WRITING.
Look at the report and compare the lay-out and numbered notes with the report. Notice that you do not write directly to someone, but write in an objective way.
1. Use headings2. State the aim of the report and where you got the information3. Divide it into relevant sections, linked to the remit
4. Quote from people in an impersonal way
5. Use a clear, neutral ( not informal) style as in a business letter.6. Balance the points fairly e.g. positive and negative.
7. Listing / numbering points can make it easier to read.
8. Only give the recommendations at the end.
9. Generalise.
10. There is no closing salutation or signature.
Task:Your company has been asked to accept a group of 10 students from another country for two weeks to get some work experience. You have been asked to find out what the advantages and disadvantages would be of accepting this group. Is it a good idea?
Write your report to your boss.
Title: Report on Proposed Group of Work Experience Students.To: Ms Ruby Smith, HR manager.From: Shan Hirst, PA to Ms SmithDate: 25.4.2013.
Introduction: (1)The purpose of this report is to consider the advantages and disadvantages of accepting a group of students from overseas for two weeks’ work experience. I have discussed the issue with all the senior managers of the different departments. (2)
Advantages: (3)All those I interviewed (4) believe that for students this would be an exciting opportunity to explore a foreign culture and to understand different working practices. (5) As far as the company is concerned, managers believe that it would give their staff an opportunity to think about their own systems and practices while they mentor the students . It would be good for the PR of the company, and could also flag up some good new applicants for entry-level positions.
Disadvantages: (6)Some managers are concerned that:
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(7)1. the staff might be too busy with their own jobs to mentor students, or to take time to explain and help.2. it would be more suitable to undertake a similar project and use our resources with British youngsters, not foreign students.3. the visitors might be more interested in enjoying themselves than making any serious contribution to the company, and may not speak English well.
Conclusion and recommendations: (8)Clearly, the group might cause some practical difficulties, but on the whole (9) everyone thought that the visit should be seen as a good opportunity, possibly with a view to setting up something similar with local youngsters in the future.
Report writing practice.1. Sept. 2013.
Part 1 – Long Task (write between 150-200 words)You work in the training department of your company. You are planning to increase foreign language training for some of your employees. You have studied 3 options and have to report to your boss on the advantages and disadvantages of the 3 proposals. Write a well presented report and make your own recommendations.
Option 1: tutor/classes at lunchtimePro: no need to travel to a schoolCon: miss lunch or lunch-time meetingsPro:Con:
Option 2: intensive courses abroadPro: learn better/ total immersionCon: few people/ who?Pro:Con:
Option 3: on-line coursePro: relatively cheapCon: requires students’ motivationPro:Con:
Recommendation:
Part 2 – Short Task (40 words max.)
You are now emailing your report to your boss. Write a brief cover email and propose a time and place for a meeting to discuss your ideas.
2. May 2014
Part 1 – Long Task
You have been asked to survey students at the University of Turin to find out what they think about how some money should be spent to improve the university and life for the students.
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There are two proposals that should be considered:
1. Improve facilities such as classrooms (broken seats, etc.) and study rooms and common areas.
2. Improve communication with students: university and department websites, information about university libraries – location, opening times, etc.
Write a well presented report with your findings. You should give information for and against the two proposals. Finally, give your conclusions and recommendations. Your report should be addressed as follows:
To: Committee for University Improvements
From: Student Survey Committee (your name )
Part 2 – Short Task (50 words max.)
You have asked several students to help you collect the information for the report. Send them an email to arrange a meeting to discuss your findings. You will only be free in the afternoon and cannot meet on Wednesday. Tell everyone to bring their results and ideas.
3. May 2015 – download from lettoratiinglese website. (Relates to Business Benchmark units 15 & 16)
Letter Writing Practice: 1. May 2003Recently you went on a business trip to America. You flew with Virgin Atlantic as usual, but this time you were not satisfied with the service. Below is a list of things that went wrong.
Flight was delayed by 4 hours – no explanations or refreshments offered at London’s Gatwick Airport. You missed your connection to Pittsburgh. Your luggage did not arrive at your destination until 2 days later. You had no clothes for an important
meeting. Staff were unhelpful. On the flight some passengers were noisy and you could not sleep, but cabin crew refused to deal with the
situation. You asked for an aisle seat but were given a seat in the middle.
Use this information to write a letter of complaint to the Virgin Atlantic Customer Relations Department, UK. The Office, Manor Royal, Crawley, West Sussex, RH10 9NU. Pay attention to the layout of the letter. Use your own name and address.
2. September 2003Charles Pinter recently flew to America on a business trip. He had a very unpleasant flight and wrote to Virgin Atlantic to complain about it. These are the points he mentioned in his letter:
Flight was delayed by 4 hours – no explanations or refreshments offered at London’s Gatwick Airport. Missed his connection to Pittsburgh. Luggage did not arrive at his destination until 2 days later. He had no clothes for an important meeting. Staff were unhelpful.
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On the flight some passengers were noisy and he could not sleep, but cabin crew refused to deal with the situation.
He asked for an aisle seat but was given a seat in the middle.
You work for Virgin Atlantic Customer Relations Department, UK. The Office, Manor Royal, Crawley, West Sussex, RH10 9NU. Write a reply to Charles Pinter, Sales Manager, Premium Electronics, 17, The Waters, Funtley, Hants.
Pay attention to the lay out and tone of the letter.
3. September 2004You work for a management training company which specializes in seminars to create team spirit in top management. Mr Igor Lendl, an important prospective customer from Havel Engineering, Prague, phoned you ten days ago to ask your boss, Ms Jenny Baron, to give an introductory talk at a two day management training session in Prague in November.Your boss, Ms Baron, is away and has asked you to write a letter on her behalf. She left the following note for you. Apologise for delay writing – reason. Confirm interest. State terms for 2 days incl. talk & workshop Confirm dates, times, facilities & equipment needed etc Give my usual special requirements so they can arrange accommodation Are there areas of special interest for Havel Eng. I should know about?
Your company:Team Management Services
36 North Road, Winchester.Clients:
Havel Engineering, Prague, Czech Republic
4. June 2007
Task 1. You have a meeting in Rome next Wednesday. Write an e-mail to a colleague explain why you’ll be out of the office say when and how long you’ll be away ask her to take calls for you while you are away
Write 35 – 50 words.
Task 2.
La Bella Vita
Regional food and wine from Piedmont Tuscany
Puglia
Production and Export
Paola Rossi
Marketing Assistant e-mail: [email protected] mob. phone: 3384873004
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Strada Rivoli, 39 phone: 0118176338 10128 Torino
You are Paola (or Paolo) Rossi. Above is your business card. Your boss has asked you to contact the organisers – SHOWFOOD - of the International Food Exhibition in London to get as much information as possible (costs, booking, dates etc) about hiring a space for a stand at the exhibition next October.Write a letter – with full letter lay out – explaining what your company does and asking for all the information you need.
5. June 2010
Long Task
You are the webmaster for a small company specialising in the import and export of luxury food products. Your manager has asked you to contact a web-design company in order to upgrade the company website. Write a formal letter to Peter Hale at Wordpress Web Design, 4 Links Road, Lytham St Annes:
giving your company’s web address giving specific details as to why the website needs upgrading offering some of your own proposals for possible changes asking for an estimate of costs
You can use your own name and invent an address for your company.
Short Task
In your role as webmaster, write an email to your managing director. You have received a detailed proposal and estimate from Peter Hale. The proposal contains many interesting ideas but the estimated costs seem excessive. Suggest a meeting for some time next week.You can decide if you want the meeting to be two-way, or to also include the web designer.
6. Sept. 2010Long TaskYou work for the customer service department of TrenItalia. You have just received a letter of complaint from an Englishman who travelled by train in Italy during the summer. He complained about:
crowded and dirty trains frequent delays and late arrivals the cost of the tickets somebody sitting in his reserved seat who refused to move TrenItalia staff not speaking English not receiving a reply to his complaints made to the TrenItalia website.
Write a reply. Use formal letter layout. Invent any other information that you need. Use your name. Your address: TrenItalia, Via dei Treini 211, Verona.Write to: Mr Keith Bacon, 32 The Lane, Happisburgh, Norfolk
Short task.You were going to go to the opera with a friend on Friday evening, but now you have to go away for a 4-day business trip. Write to apologise and suggest something else you could do together. Write no more than 35 words.
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7. May 2011. Please note that you must do both tasks:Part 1 Long Task:You work for Mystery Shoppers Inc., a company that provides a service to shops helping them to evaluate staff performance, by sending trained “mystery shoppers” to shop in the store and thus observe the behaviour of sales assistants.As requested by the management of Glamour Puss fashion store- “ for the up-to-date working woman” , you sent one of your staff (Glenda Smithson) to the Barnet branch of the store as a “mystery shopper” 3 times over the last 2 weeks.She reported back on what she observed.
Here are her notes: No greeting on entry Staff chatting, ignored me Irritated response to enquiry. Generally unhelpful Or irritatingly persistent. Following customer knew little about stock: sizes, colours etc Loud rap music playing – not store’s image Slow inefficient service at cash desk. Long queues.
Suggestions:Staff training needed to improve: Customer relations Positive sales techniques Store atmosphere Cash desk service
Query to management: Staff clearly unmotivated. Why?
Write a correctly laid-out letter to Ms Avril Laughton, manager of Glamour Puss, 15 High St., Hounslow, using Smithson’s note to give her report on her staff and suggest the future action she should take. Invent any other information you need. Remember, where possible you should use your own words – not those used in the original question.
Part 2 Short Task (max 40 words):
You are Avril Laughton write an email to your assistant manager to set up a meeting today or tomorrow to discuss the Mystery Shoppers report. Say why it is urgent. You are free only after 4 pm.
8. September 7th 2012
Please note that you must do both tasks:
PART 1 LONG TASKYou work as a consultant for a company specialized in improving image and performance of small restaurants. You have been assigned a contract to update a chain of natural fast food eating parlours that have shown a decline in sales over the past months. You have been observing the chain for a month and have made the following notes:
Observations: Old fashioned logo Not very clean Boring, monotonous menu Unfriendly tired staff No music Good salads but uninspired
desserts No system for building up
customer loyaltyEither:
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Suggestions:Update imageImprove on hygieneRenew menuTraining course for staffInstall internal hifi systemConsider promotions and customer fidelity cards
BUSINESS WRITING- MEDIAZIONE
Write a report to the owner of the chain of Natural Wholefood Eating Parlours to explain the problems and your proposal for the future. Invent any other information you may need. Use your own words.
Or:You have been asked to write a report to explain the problems and your proposal for the future, by the end of this week. However, the full report will not be ready on time. Write a letter to the owner of the chain of Natural Wholefood Eating Parlours explaining the delay and apologising, and provide an outline of the most important points that will appear in the report . Use your own words.
Part 2 Short Task (max 40 words) You are the owner of the chain of Natural Wholefood Eating Parlours. Write an email to summon all the restaurant managers of your chain to a meeting to discuss the results of the report. Give a date, time and place. The meeting must be held early in the morning before the individual Eating Parlours open up to the public. Explain why attendance is compulsory.
2ND YEAR WRITING – CRITERIA AND MARKING SCHEME ( MEDIAZIONE & TOURISM) - STUDENT COPY
MARKS TASK ACHIEVEMENT COHERENCE & COHESION
LEXICAL RESOURCE GRAMMATICAL RANGE & ACCURACY
Band 513 – 15Very good & professional
Satisfies all requirements of task
Tone, register and format appropriate
Sequences in-formation logically
Wide range of appropriate & precise vocabu-lary
Words and phrases from ori-ginal question are reformulated
Wide range of structures used with flexibility
Punctuation ac-curate and help-ful
Band 411 – 12Good & reasonably professional
Covers the re-quirements of the task suffi-ciently
Tone, register and format appropriate
Logically organ-ises ideas – there is clear progres-sion
Vocabulary pre-cise enough to convey clear meaning & suffi-cient range to al-low some preci-sion
Words and phrases from ori-ginal question generally refor-mulated
Generally has good control of grammar
Punctuation is generally helpful and accurate
Band 39 – 10Satisfactory – but needs reviewing in professional situation
Most informa-tion or points addressed and partially developed
Tone, register and format mostly appro-priate
Generally fairly coherent but …
Paragraphing not always appropri-ate
Simple vocabu-lary mainly cor-rect
Uses some phrases from question paper rather than refor-mulating
Errors in gram-mar and punctu-ation do not usu-ally reduce com-munication
Band 2 Some, but not Presents informa- Limited range of Errors in verb
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6 – 8Not sufficient response (not sufficiently accurate or professional)
all, features of task attemp-ted & / or only partially covered
Tone may be uneven
Format may be inappropri-ate
tion & ideas but not arranged co-herently and there is no clear progression in the response
Haphazard para-graphing
vocabulary used repetitively and may be minim-ally adequate for the task
forms, punctu-ation and haphazard changes of tense confuse meaning
Band 15 & less
poor
Confusion as to situation & reader
None of re-quired points addressed satisfactorily
Does not organ-ise ideas logically
Vocabulary too simple or impre-cise
Limited range of words other than those in original question
Some sentences are accurate but errors predomin-ate and may dis-tort meaning
Accuracy mostly in memorised phrases
Writing - maximum 20 marks in total: Long task maximum marks = 15 Short task maximum marks = 5 ( corresponds to ‘band’ above)
Marking Scheme ( summary)
Pass: 18 - 20
Could be sent out virtually unchanged. Task completed
16 - 18Could be sent out with minor changes to grammar, spelling etc.Content OK. Task completed and next step is clearRegister OK
12 - 15Would cause the firm to lose some credibility if sent out without being edited:Some noticeable language errors Extremely simple and therefore rather superficialSome points of content not dealt with.Although it covers the task, it is not sufficiently professional in approachPoor layout makes reading a chore. e.g. no gaps between paragraphs.
Fail: 9 – 11
Confused or confusing.Missing references / or points are not made in a logical order within appropriate paragraphsInappropriate response to the task. No clear next stepToo many language errors.Tone may cause offence.Inappropriate style / layoutPoor cohesion /vocabulary /language
5 – 8Would cause annoyance or misunderstanding if sent out. Possibly through:Irrelevant / inadequate content.Basic language errorsTone / register Not all the points have been covered
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0 – 4Totally inadequate attempt. Language errors predominate. Incoherent. Has not fulfilled the task.
Assessment Criteria.An impression mark out of 20 is given ( independently by two examiners) using the scale above. The table shows the typical features of work which will be awarded marks within the indicated ranges. Such features include layout (standard formats and conventions), content (appropriate and relevant information) and language (grammar, vocabulary, spelling and punctuation).
Checklist for Writing.
Don’t Dobegin a letter without a plan
ramble on long and aimlessly
include irrelevant, trivial or obscure material
use jargon, officialese or out of date phrases
use slang or over familiar terms
be vague about the action you require
be hostile, sarcastic, rude, offensive, tactless, condescending
be indifferent
allow letters to be sent before checking for errors in composition or word processing
use set phrases where they are not appropriate.
be clear about the aims
plan the main points in a logical sequence
keep it short and simple ‘kiss’ (re: sentences)
express yourself clearly
only include relevant material
check that the tone is appropriate and that this is a letter you would be happy to have made public
be clear about requests or other things you need doing
be sure that you have covered all the necessary points and moved the action forward – suggest dates / times / venues etc
BE COURTEOUS and use tact not aggression.
be sincere
ALWAYS CHECK FOR ERRORS! in spelling and punctuation.
Remember: Once despatched the letter / report / email is a written record. Always check that you won’t regret the words you have committed to paper!
FOR FURTHER PRACTICE SEE BUSINESS BENCHMARK UPPER INTERMEDIATE STUDENT’S BOOK: WRITING REFERENCE PAGES 116 -124&
EXAM SKILLS – WRITING PAGES 148 - 152
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