LWE HBMS

LTE LTLS

You see your boy/girl friend with someone else & they are acting very friendly to each other.

Your parents ground you the week of the big dance

You get caught not telling the truth Your grade in math drops Someone spills a Coke in your new car You come in to work to find you have been

laid off Someone offers you a drug Your best friend suddenly starts hanging out

with someone else.

Someone you admire takes on a behavior that you don’t think your parents agree with.

A project in a class you dislike is taking time away from an assignment from a class you really like.

Your core group of grades begins to engage in dangerous behaviors such as drug use.

A parent scolds you because you did something they don’t agree with.

You are angry with your best friend for not doing something you wanted to do.

Defense Mechanisms

Negative Situation = reaction or behavior = masked feelings

Concerns Behavior may be unacceptable/

unhealthy Becomes consistent

Events are too painful to facePersonal & Peer awarenessConstructive Reactions

What you do: Tell yourself it is not

happening Tell yourself it is not your

fault Conscious denial of the

thought or feelingExample “I am not mad…I really

didn’t notice it was happening.”

Problem Denial only prolongs and

exacerbates the issue

What you do: Somewhat aware but tries to hide

the thought or feeling Keep painful thoughts and

feelings away from consciousness.

Examples: Early abuse Lies you have told Painful memoriesProblems: Diverts needed energy Blocks out stressful situations

that could be worked out

What you do: In defense against the threatening

impulse, express the opposite impulse.

Examples: Someone frightens you so you act super

nice You dislike someone so you act friendly

Problems: False persona

What you do: Attribute your own

undesirable impulses, feeling, or desires to another person

Examples: “I hate her” really means “I think she hates me”Problems: Misperceive the other

person’s motivations Don’t deal with your own

feelings Overreaction

What you do: Direct the feeling

away from its actual target to another, safer target

ExampleYou are angry at a

friend and yell at a younger sibling.

Feeling: anxiety anger

What you do: Make up excuses for

inadequacies, failure, or lossExamples: If I had wanted to try hard, I could

have done it too. She must be having a bad day. If I had better teachers, I would

have gotten higher grades.Problems: Energy would be better spent on

improving. The truth catches up with you.

What you do:Attempt to rid themselves of a

feeling by DOING something that indicates the opposite feeling

Examples:Palee makes a rude comment, but

draws a picture for you on your next meeting

Problems:Does not address or atone the

behavior

What you do You think one thing but feel

another. Example

You know you should feel sad but you are not sad.

Someone has experienced loss and you express empathy but it is not sincere.

Problem Can leave one feeling out of

place with society or the group.

What you do: Revert back to behavior of

an earlier stage Use childhood coping

mechanismsExamples: Temper tantrums, swearing,

fighting, sulking, cryingProblems: Does not solve the problem People think you are

immature You are not learning to cope

well

What you doRedirect feelings into a socially acceptable activityExampleSomeone who has anger issues takes up an “aggressive” sportProblemThe resolution does not address the problem only redirects. It is only a matter of time before the problem manifests into a serious issue.

What you doPuts off an unpleasant task until due date is close or has past.ExampleDelay writing a paper for class until the night before it is due.ProblemCauses great stress

What you do: Feelings of inadequacy in one

area of life so they will work very hard to do well in another area.

Examples: Weak in school, excellent in

sports. Class clown

Problems: Unbalanced Incompetent in some areas Overcompensates for

inadequate feelings

What you do: Dreaming, imagining instead of living

in the present world, because you don ’t feel competent to achieve.

PretendingExamples: Wanting to look good and pretending

to themselves that they are someone they idolize.

Making up stories about how successful you are, rather than working on your success.

Problems: You get stuck in the fantasy rather

than using your talents to become successful.