Mentoring, Class 4

CE 693(AKA CE 659A)

Tonight• Kris Racina– UAF HR Director

• Discussion of mentoring situation– Metaphors

• Mentoring one-on-one– Defer “goals” a little– Techniques• Listening• Questions• Stories

• Artem• Clutterbuck

Discussion

– Pick one employee, fictional employee, or yourself– Think of one goal you feel they should have in

order to advance– Explain where they/you are in the conversation

and commitment continuum

Goals Notes

• Reverse Mentoring• Mentee’s goal is proportional to the sphere of

his influence. • Mentee owned but Mentor guided• Link to Mentee's personal benefits• Imaginary barriers to self improvement• Steps to goals, intermediate goals

Metaphor

• About to into a difficult meeting, “Watch where you’re going - don’t step on any rattlesnakes.”

• “Don’t step on any toes.”• “The early worm gets eaten.”

Four Hinges

• Effective Questioning– http://www.changingminds.org/techniques/questioni

ng/questioning.htm

• Active Listening– http://www.changingminds.org/techniques/listening

/active_listening.htm

• Clear feedback

• Well-organized sessions

Six Steps

1. Mentor/coach and (client) get to know on another to establish clarity and rapport, engage, and agree what the goal is

2. Discuss the current reality, to which the mentor/coach will adapt the mentoring style

3. Explore available options4. Identify and commit to a course of actions (at a

pace the client is comfortable with) in line with shared expectations (that might involve training)

5. The client implements the agreed actions with the support of and clear (constructive and positive) feedback from mentor

6. The mentor/coach and client consider what has been learned and how they might build on that knowledge, possibly initiating a new cycle.

Path to Goal

• Step 1 Ask mentee to define the goal as clearly as possible (in no more than 10 words).

• Test definition re SMART– Specific– Measurable– Attainable– Realistic– Time bound

• Step 2. Explore what would need to be done to achieve

• Step 3. Break step 2 into sub-items and explore

• Step 4. Apply some timelines– When would mentee want to accomplish some

• Step 5. Review the process

OK, but

• First we have to make it a goal• (more later)

Pause for Homework

• Crib notes for your first meeting about goals (We’ll update this later.)

Listening• Don’t yawn• Don’t slouch• Don’t look at your watch• What do you do?

Active Listening

Active Listening

• Comprehending– Shared meaning

• Retaining– Remembering

• Responding– Speaker looks for response indicating message is

being listened to

Barriers

• Shifting to ME• Interrupting• Daydreaming• Hogging• Others?

Helps

• Positive Encouragement• Give them space– Sit through pauses

• Attentive– Ignore distractions– Stillness– Leaning forward– Tilted head– Gaze

Questions

• Represents a shift for managers, from– omniscience to– Collaboration

• Help mentee figure it out for themselves

When not to use Questions

• Twenty questions• Performance feedback• Necessary information• Giving directions• If they lack background

Useful Questions

• Analyzing and Problem Solving– Say the mentee comes to you with a problem– Help them think about how to solve (themselves)

• Evaluating options and making decisions– How would you do it?

• Doing things better or differently– What happened?– What can be done to make matters better

• Developing plans– Yes

Types, Closed End

• Did you take out the garbage?• When is the meeting?• Where is the meeting on the garbage?• Key words: Who, when where– Who? Him.– When? Yesterday.– Where? There.

Open-Ended

• Why are you reluctant to take out the garbage?

• What will you do to insure that the garbage is taken out?

• What will you do to keep too much garbage from coming into the meeting?

• Key Words: what, how, tell, describe, explain

Why Not Why

• “Why” typically begs an open-ended response.

• But• Sounds accusatory or “grilling”• Compare– Please explain you thinking on that? Versus– Why the hell did you do it?

Useful Discussion Strategy

• Seek positive outcomes• Go in a logical flow• Tune in and listen

+ vs. -

• “I want you to see how your behavior is inappropriate and causing me and everyone else here so much pain.”

• “I want you to realize how you should never do this again.”

• “Let’s discuss what can be learned from this experience and come up with a plan to make things work better in the future.”

• “I want you to see how your behavior is inappropriate and causing me and everyone else here so much pain.”

• “I want you to realize how you should never do this again.”

• “Let’s discuss what can be learned from this experience and [we or you?] come up with a plan to make things work better in the future.”

Guide the Flow

• Object is not disciplining• Nor venting my temper• Nor instructing• What is object?

Growth

• Remember – Dialog– Commitment

Situation

• Mentee John works in next department. Excellent technical skills, now a new supervisor, eager to learn and advance. You’ve been meeting monthly for six months.

• John has 4 technical employees reporting to him. One has found out you are John’s mentor -

• “When John has a problem with our work he displays a temper and often throws our work on our desk. Stops short of abuse, but is not polite – makes us feel angry or hurt.”

• You’ve observed John in action, and you believe the employee.

• Now for your regular monthly meeting with John:

• Where are you, the mentor, going? • [next]

Think

• Where are John and I at in the dialog spectrum?

• Where is John at in the commitment spectrum?

Think re Dialog and Change

My Goal?

• Discuss:

Un-Paused

• Update crib notes.

Homework

• Items for discussion from Elements of Mentoring – (third point of view – executive who choose

mentees)– Give out numbers in class– 4, 6, 8, 10robert , 13, 18artem, 21mike, 25clint,

31, 32, 35roi, 36, 38jake, 50, 51, 52lon• Read and print out Missouri Mentoring docs.