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The Award Winning Newsletter of THE JAGUAR CAR CLUB OF VICTORIA Victoria, British Columbia, Canada Issue #120 www.jaguarcarclub.ca May 2014 Words from the President: Victoria Hospice Meet the Board May Prowl Report Two Coffee Klatch Reports CDN XK Jaguar Register Invitation Beacon Hill Father’s Day Picnic Notice Bits & Bytes Barn Find E-Types Hospice Events JOTI Update INSIDE INSIDE
Transcript
Page 1: NSIDENSIDE · The Island Growler is published monthly, and is Director at Large distributed by mail and digital file to members of JCCV. 250 All back issues are available by digital

The Award Winning Newsletter of

THE JAGUAR CAR CLUB OF VICTORIA Victoria, British Columbia, Canada

Issue #120 www.jaguarcarclub.ca May 2014

Words from the President: Victoria Hospice Meet the Board May Prowl Report Two Coffee Klatch Reports CDN XK Jaguar Register Invitation Beacon Hill Father’s Day Picnic Notice Bits & Bytes Barn Find E-Types Hospice Events JOTI Update

INSIDEINSIDE

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THE JAGUAR CAR CLUB OF VICTORIA 2017 Cadboro Bay Road, Box 112

Victoria BC Canada V8R 5G4 www.jaguarcarclub.ca

[email protected] founded 2003

The Island Growler is published monthly, and is distributed by mail and digital file to members of JCCV.

All back issues are available by digital file.

All information and advice is presented in good faith, and no liability whatsoever will be assumed by JCCV.

Opinions expressed herein are not necessarily those of JCCV, the Directors of JCCV, or of the Editor.

Editor: Malcolm Baster [email protected]

Associate Editor: Lois Smith [email protected]

Technical Adviser: Angelika Ehlers [email protected]

Events: Malcolm Baster [email protected]

JCCV meetings take place on the fourth Tuesday of each month, except December, at 7:30 pm in the Chiefs & Petty Officers Mess, CFB Esquimalt, at 1575 Lyall Street in Victoria. Our AGM is held with the November meeting.

MEETINGS

Membership in JCCV is open to anyone interested in and enthusiastic about Jaguar automobiles. There is no need to own one of these fine cars to be a member.

For information, email us at [email protected] or drop us a note in the mail. We’ll send complete details.

If you believe that a Jaguar is more than just a car, you are one of us!

JOTI Chair: Wayne Watkins 250-652-1247 [email protected]

JCNA Chief Judge: Gregory Andrachuk 250-595-7453 v12,[email protected]

JCNA Liaison: Gregory Andrachuk 250-595-7453 [email protected]

Prowl Convener: Barbara Driver 250-743-6756 [email protected]

Webmaster: Lou Watkins 250-652-1247 [email protected]

Regalia Coordinators: Jennifer McCallan & Jean Hughes

250-656-6705 [email protected]

250-479-5344 b&[email protected]

Hospice Liaison: Tom Arnold 250-519-1749 [email protected]

Display advertising of interest to Jaguar enthusiasts is accepted. For rates and other information, please send an email to [email protected].

Classified advertisements can be placed at no cost and will only be placed in the upcoming issue. Please request reprint in following issues if required. To place a classi-fied ad please send an email to [email protected].

ADVERTISING

President: Graham Walker 250-479-7364 [email protected]

Vice-President: Alan Heartfield 250-508-7277 [email protected]

Secretary: Carol McGinty 778-433-7705 [email protected]

Treasurer: Barry McCallan 250-656-6705 [email protected]

Membership Secretary: John Wigmore 250-592-7885 [email protected]

Director at Large: Isabel Weeks-Lambert 250-383-4643 [email protected]

Director at Large: Gregory Andrachuk 250-595-7453 [email protected]

Director at Large: Peter Jeffrey 778-351-3843 [email protected]

Director at Large: Doug Easton 250-595-2822 [email protected]

Immed. Past President: Merritt Chisholm 250-656-0030 [email protected]

2014 DIRECTORS

APPOINTED POSITIONS 2014

MEMBERSHIP

SUBMISSIONS

Submissions are always welcome and are encouraged. We kindly ask that all articles follow the publication specifications provided below. To submit an article please send it to [email protected].

SUBMISSION DEADLINE June 2014 Issue: June10, 2014 August 2014 Issue: Aug 10, 2014

PUBLICATION SPECIFICATIONS Text: Font: Arial; Font Size: 10pt; Format: Word, PDF, or Text file Photo/Image: 1000x800 pixels; max size 1MB; Format: jpeg or gif

PLEASE SUPPORT OUR ADVERTISERS ! Don’t forget to mention that you saw their ad in “The Island Growler”.

We are affiliated with The Jaguar Clubs of North America

www.jcna.com

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Contents

The Island Growler Advertisers:

Battery Direct 13

Big-O-Tires 3

Coachwerks 13

Diamond Detailing 9

Electro Shine 3

Hagerty Classic Car Insurance 15

Isabel Weeks-Lambert 9

Jetstream Custom Auto 9

Oceanside Auto Appraisers Ltd 7

MacDonald Realty Ltd. Eleanor V. Smith 7

SNG Barratt Group 5

Styles Upholstery 13

Sussex Automotive: Alan Petrie 7

Welsh Enterprises Inc. 7

XKs Unlimited 5

Words from the President 4

Cover Photo Story 4

Meet the Board 6

May Prowl Report 8

Coffee Klatch Report 10

Slalom Info 11

CDN XK Jaguar Invitation 11

Father’s Day Picnic Notice 12

Another Coffee Klatch Report 12

E-Type and Mille Miglia News 13

Bits & Bytes 14

Barn Find E-Types 16

Hospice Events 17

Wants and For Sale 18

JOTI Update 19

Events Calendar 20

Another Bit & Byte 21

Classic Jaguar Ad 22

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die at home, and the hospice’s services seek to provide support for this through community care programmes. Community doctors, counsellors, and volunteers as well as a 24-hour on-call service, the Palliative Response Team, assist patients to stay in their own homes and en-joy the best possible quality of life until the end. It is remarkable that the work of the hospice is support-ed by more than three hundred active clinical volunteers, most of whom first undertook a six week training course to support patients at the in-patient unit. Tom advised us that many have served for 10, 20, even 30 years! Here are a few figures from last year:

417 was the average number of people registered

with hospice on any given day; 884 was the number of end of life patients cared for

during the year; Over 1,600 was the number of Palliative Response

Team visits to area homes; 4,854 is the number of patients and family members

helped; $7,402,699 was the combined annual operating ex-

penditures for the Society and the Foundation of which $3,126,440 was donated.

The benefit this institution provides the general public would be impossible without the generosity of many indi-viduals, clubs and institutions and the remarkable number of dedicated, kind and public spirited volunteers. In my opinion, the wisdom of those early members of our club in choosing this as our charity is obvious; and so, while I do commend those who would preserve our fa-vourite cat, this charity is immensely worthy.

WORDS FROM THE PRESIDENT

Graham Walker

The charitable purpose of at least one Jaguar club in North America is to support the preservation and breed-ing of our favourite cat. Our charitable purpose is pedes-trian by comparison, hospice care for those at the end of life. Each year the club is pleased to support the Victoria Hospice, located on the campus of the Royal Jubilee Hospital. For the last several years, we have donated $4000 annually, most of that being raised by our Jaguars on the Island event. It may surprise some of you that do-nations constitute nearly 50% of the budget of the Hos-pice. Years ago, the building housed the maternity sec-tion of the Jubilee (where Anne was born), but now, in-stead of serving those at the beginning of life, it serves those at the end without regard to age or social status. I thought it worthwhile to go there with Anne to obtain some insight into the virtue of our choice of charity. Tom Arnold, senior development officer, was our guide and he was kind enough to spend an hour or so touring the facili-ty with us. It is not possible to canvass here all I learned, but I will try to compress as much as I can within the space our learned editor allows. Victoria Hospice is best known for its in-patient unit but it also operates a considerable out-patient programme. The in-patient unit has 17 beds divided into acute care for patients with complex medical issues or symptoms to manage, extended care for patients in their last weeks who are unable to die at home, and respite care where patients can come for a week to provide a break both to them and their caregivers. Patients there are treated with the particular concern and respect due those at the end of life and so, in addi-tion to necessary medical attention, they have:

· In so far as possible, a non hospital like environ-ment with pleasant and casual visiting rooms, wall hung pictures and other decorations, includ-ing homemade quilts for the beds;

· No set visiting hours and even facilities for family members to stay overnight;

· Counsellors and a spiritual care co-ordinator, to help both patients and families with the emotional needs of facing the end of life;

· A large rooftop flower garden (which I noticed had a clear view of the Olympic Mountains) with several seating areas;

· A pet therapy programme, using specially trained dogs who visit with the patients. In fact, patients can even bring in their own pets (dogs, cats, etc) for visits;

· The only designated smoking area in the hospital and even permission to drink alcohol in their rooms if they choose (and their doctor allows.)

Our overriding impression on entering the place and throughout our visit was of serenity, respectfulness, warmth and welcome: qualities essential to the purpose. The less widely known operation of the hospice is that its care extends well beyond its walls. More and more people prefer to

Advertising Rates

Classified Ads Ads for cars, parts, merchandise, etc. for sale will be run free of charge for one month.

Display Ads Full Page: $550/yr Half Page: $375/yr Quarter Page: $250/yr Business Card: $125/yr

Yearly Ads are printed in 11 standard issues and in the JOTI special issue.

Contact: [email protected]

COVER PHOTO

This is your newsletter: If you have an idea for a “latest update” or content for the newsletter,

please contact the editors @ [email protected]

The XJ220 was produced by Jaguar in collaboration with Tom Walkinshaw Racing from 1992 to 1994. The car ini-tially had no official support, and was designed by a group of employees, known as “the Saturday club,” work-ing in their spare time. The intent was to produce a car to race in the FIA Group B competitions. It was powered by a turbocharged V6 engine, and was for a time the fastest production car in the world, topping out at 217 mph.

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die at home, and the hospice’s services seek to provide support for this through community care programmes. Commu-nity doctors, counsellors, and volunteers as well as a 24-hour on-call service, the Palliative Response Team, assist patients to stay in their own homes and enjoy the best possible quality of life until the end. It is remarkable that the work of the hospice is supported by more than three hundred active clinical volunteers, most of whom first undertook a six week training course to support patients at the in-patient unit. Tom advised us that many have served for 10, 20, even 30 years! Here are a few figures from last year:

417 was the average number of people registered with hospice on any given day;

884 was the number of end of life patients cared for during the year;

Over 1,600 was the number of Palliative Response Team visits to area homes;

4,854 is the number of patients and family members helped;

$7,402,699 was the combined annual operating expenditures for the Society and the Foundation of which $3,126,440 was donated.

The benefit this institution provides the general public would be impossible without the generosity of many individuals, clubs and institutions and the remarkable number of dedicated, kind and public spirited volunteers. In my opinion, the wisdom of those early members of our club in choosing this as our charity is obvious And so, while I do com-mend those who would preserve our favourite cat, this charity is immensely worthy.

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MEET T HE BOARD 2014 by Lois Smith

ISABEL WEEKS -L AMBERT, MEMBER -AT -L ARGE

Having served on the JCCV Board as a general member in 2007, Vice-President 2008/09, President 2011/12, and Past President 2013, Isabel has returned to the Board this year as Member-at-Large, “in charge of every-thing to do with food,” she laughs.

Isabel and husband, Ken, are Charter Members of the JCCV, with Isabel having

traded in her TR6 for a VDP (joining Ken’s ‘96 XJS) just months before the club was formed. Since she first joined the Board, she has made it her mission to engage the women, believing that a variety of social activities are as important to the club’s success as the restoration and preservation of the marque.

Originally from Ontario, Isabel took her law degree at the University of Western Ontario, and her instructor in corpo-rate law is now Governor General of Canada. Widowed by cancer at a young age, she was eventually, through the instigation of Ken’s youngest son, “set up on a blind date.” And the rest, as they say, is history!

Isabel and Ken moved to San Diego in 1983 and Isabel became a member of the State Bar of California. She is still

a practising member there, specializing in franchise law and working with referral clients, including some she has never met. “It’s all document-driven,” she says, “and with email, phones and fax, there’s no need to travel down there.” She does, however, travel to Tucson, AZ, four times a year for meetings as a member of the Board of a restaurant chain belonging to her favourite California cli-ent.

Isabel and Ken arrived in Victoria in 2000, and Isabel is also a member of the Law Society of BC. Although she claims to be “officially semi-retired,” she is still actively engaged in her practice as a general solicitor. When not lawyering or JCCVing, Isabel loves to cook and entertain and is also a keen photographer. In fact, she has won several awards for her photography. But photography is taking a back seat to a new interest: jewellery-making.

Isabel sold her VDP in 2012 and purchased a 2006 S-Type in Los Angeles. “When Julie Bailey and I went to Los Angeles to pick up the S-Type, Marke Simmons and Carol Bird came to meet us and drove back with us,” she explains. “We stopped at several bead shops on the way back, and I was hooked.” Isabel says she likes to be busy; she is certainly that! Next on her agenda: the annu-al Father’s Day Car Picnic in Beacon Hill Park. It marks the 11th Anniversary of JCCV and, as always, Isabel will be “in charge of food.”

PETER JEFFREY, MEMBER -AT -L ARGE

After about two words from Peter, you wonder, “where is he from?” Well, wonder no more. Aberdeen, on the east coast of Scotland, is where both Peter and his wife Judy were born and raised. Although they knew each other in Scotland, it was in Cape Town that they met again and this time, it led to marriage. Returning to Scotland, Peter took his Master’s in electrical engineering. He began work with Ferranti Defense Systems in Edinburgh where he became a Program Manager, and went on to spend his entire career in the aerospace and defense industry.

Peter has always been very interested in cars and motor sports. In fact, he remembers as a young boy sitting on his father’s knee, steering the family’s 1946 Jaguar 3.5 litre saloon, one of the first made after the war. Peter ac-quired his first car - a 1934 Morris Minor - at university, then graduated up through a Mini to a Cooper S and by this time, he had discovered special stage rallying. Rally-ing, off-road racing and restoring classic British cars be-came part of Peter’s lifelong passions for cars. In fact, on his very first weekend after their move to Canada, Peter met a fellow Scot who had just built a rally car, and ended up co-driving with him for three years.

In 1976, Peter and Judy, their two-year-old son and nine-month-old baby boy immigrated to Canada where Peter began with Litton Systems. After a few years in Toronto, they were transferred to California, where their third son was born. “We absolutely loved California,” Peter says simply of their four years in the U.S.

Returning to Canada once more, Peter’s work took the Jeffreys to Toronto, Montre-al, Calgary and Ottawa. Throughout their many moves, Peter kept up his involvement with motor sport and car clubs. Retire-ment finally brought them to Vancouver Island. They set-tled first in Qualicum Beach, and just relocated to Victoria about a year ago.

Once retired, Peter turned to historic car racing. With Ju-dy as “crew,” he raced his 1961 Triumph TR3B at tracks in Mission, Seattle and Portland until, in his own words, “I tell people the car was getting too old to be doing this sort of thing any more.”

Although Peter had always thought of Jaguars as lovely cars, it wasn’t until just four years ago he acquired his first Jaguar - a 1967 2+2 that was badly in need of love and attention. He is still in the middle of restoring it, so ac-quired a 1990 XJS convertible to take them out and about. They joined JCCV in order to meet people in Victo-ria and both say that has worked out very well for them.

As well as restoring his Jaguar, Peter is a dedicated DIYer with renovations ongoing at their lovely Dean Park home. He is also researching the family history to pass along to their three sons and two grandsons.

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PLEASE SUPPORT OUR ADVERTISERS ! Don’t forget to mention that you saw their ad in “The Island Growler”.

Page 8: NSIDENSIDE · The Island Growler is published monthly, and is Director at Large distributed by mail and digital file to members of JCCV. 250 All back issues are available by digital

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May Prowl to Jaguar Victoria: a full house The May Prowl organized by Barb Driver and Brian Evers was a great success. Sixteen Jaguars crowded in to the underground Service Parking area at Jaguar Victoria on Sunday, May 4th. An overflow group of another dozen Jaguars and daily drivers (it was raining, after all) parked nearby. Jaguar Victoria service staff were on hand to ac-tivate the garage door, which of course is normally locked on Sundays. Parts Manager and club member Peter Mer-canti enthusiastically greeted over 40 club members with flowers for the ladies and a gift for everyone. We started off with a tour of the parts department and learned about their very quick parts delivery process. We then worked our way in to the service bays. We had a great view of state-of-the-art lubricants delivery system, four wheel alignment apparatus and hoists designed for both Land Rovers and Jaguars. Peter described the company’s as-sociation with tire companies and the exclusive tire war-ranty program they offer. Peter explained the workings of the new tire changing machine and the electronic wheel balancing machine. Then it was upstairs to the show-room. We were greeted by sales staff, including Ruben Little, Sales and Leasing Consultant. Some models on display in the showroom were a Land Rover, Jaguar XF, F-Type convertibles and a non-Jaguar – an Aston Martin. We were hoping to be able to sit in a new Jaguar F-Type coupe but alas, the shipper did not get it to Victoria in time for our visit. Any day now! We did have a close- up look under the bonnet of one of the F-Types to check out the finer points of the engine. Noted that the optional 550 hp 5.0 litre Supercharged V8 has a top speed of 300 km/h. Wow! We were treated to a nice lunch of sandwiches, rolled sandwiches, veggies, pickles and olives. Well received ice cold bottled water added to the enjoyment. Some headed over to the counter for a coffee or tea. As the visit to Jaguar Land Rover Victoria came to an end President Graham and Prowl organizer Brian Evers thanked Peter Mercanti and his associates for being such welcoming and enthusiastic hosts. Graham presented a model of a classic E-Type mounted on a wood base to Peter on behalf of the Jaguar Car Club of Victoria.

Our host, Peter Mercanti, addresses his visitors

JCCV Sunday Prowl, May 4, 2014 Story by Wayne Watkins. Photos by Wayne Watkins and Lois Smith

Jaguar Club members listen to a presentation by Peter Mercanti in the service area of Jaguar Victoria.

Jaguar Club members discuss the finer points of new Jaguar models in the Jaguar Victoria showroom.

Jaguar Victoria Sales Consultant Ruben Little poses be-side the Jaguar F-Type Coupe poster, while assuring us that the real thing will be here in just days.

Page 9: NSIDENSIDE · The Island Growler is published monthly, and is Director at Large distributed by mail and digital file to members of JCCV. 250 All back issues are available by digital

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PLEASE SUPPORT OUR ADVERTISERS ! Don’t forget to mention that you saw their ad in “The Island Growler”.

Specializing in: Restoration Sheet metal Custom Engines/transmissions Paint & body Suspension From minor repairs to full ground-up restoration, let Jetstream take your Jaguar to new heights.

JeJetstream Custom Auto

Jason Stoch 250-654-0135

Unit B, 2072 Henry Ave. West, Sidney, BC V8L 5Y1

www.JetstreamCustomAuto.com

Page 10: NSIDENSIDE · The Island Growler is published monthly, and is Director at Large distributed by mail and digital file to members of JCCV. 250 All back issues are available by digital

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Where to go for the April Coffee Klatch? The Times Colo-

nist Half Marathon was pounding down Beach Drive right

past our two favourite Coffee Klatch haunts - the Oak Bay

Beach Hotel and the Oak Bay Marina Coffee Shop at Tur-

key Head. And right at the time we would be trying to nav-

igate the same road. Today Nike shoes trumped Coven-

try Cats. Ahh, but what a great way to stretch the collec-

tive legs of a number of club members' Jaguars and head

out the Pat Bay Highway to the Sidney North Saanich

Yacht Club. Upon arrival, the parking lot revealed over a

dozen Jaguars and a half dozen non-Jaguars. Inside the

yacht club the money basket soon filled up with toonies

for those bottomless cups of coffee. While some mem-

bers settled in to the comfortable chairs, others walked

around cocktail party style. Some of us went out to the

patio. While it wasn't exactly warm outside a couple of

yacht club regulars turned on the gas fired patio heaters.

Now that's more like it! The always interesting chit chat

ensued - what Jaguars have been bought and sold, dis-

cussion about refinishing leather upholstery and discus-

sion about the upcoming Prowl to Jaguar Victoria with the

hopes that the new Jaguar Racing Green F-Type coupe

will be there to greet us. As they say, a good time was

had by all.

Coffee Klatch at the Sidney North Saanich Yacht Club

April 27, 2014 By Wayne Watkins.

With comfy chairs at a premium, some members headed out onto the patio - with the comfort of the gas-fired patio heaters.

With sailboat models overhead and two hours of coffee consumed, Isabel and Ken wave farewell to the group.

An aerial shot of the Sidney North Saanich Yacht Club

************************************************************** A nervous Jaguar Club member was boarding a yacht at the Sidney North Saanich Yacht Club. “Er...do yachts like this sink very often?” he anxiously asked the captain. “No, usually just once,” replied the captain cheerfully.

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PLEASE NOTE: Our Pender Island Jaunt

will be considered our June Prowl. There will be no other Prowl in June.

Prowl Announcement, June, 2014

The next meeting of the

JAGUAR CAR CLUB OF VICTORIA is on Tuesday, May 27, 2014

at 7:30 pm

at the Chief & Petty Officers’ Mess CFB Esquimalt, 1575 Lyall Street, Victoria

Presentation by: Club members Graham and Linda Darby went to the Goodwood Revival in 2013.

The Revival is the most popular historic race meeting in the world, and is devoted entirely to the racing scene of the 1940’s, 50’s and 60’s. Many of motor racing’s elite from that era may be seen there, perhaps even met! Graham and Linda will present both com-mentary and pictures of this marvellous

event.

SEE YOU THERE! An Invitiation from

The Canadian

XK Jaguar

Register

We would like to extend the invitation for your club members to join us in August for our 45th Annual Her-itage Classic; attached is the fillable entry and infor-mation brochure to share with your group. The all new location in Langley City is close to border crossings and Tsawwassen ferry terminal and designed to be a user-friendly weekend. A new feature also is the ability to enter and pay online through our website,

www.jaguarmg.com. Please see the registration forms on pages 23 and 24

Many of us will be seeing you at JOTI in July, and look forward to your always impeccable hospitality and or-ganization.

Thanks and best regards,

Carole Borgens

Slalom

Victoria MG Club Slalom Calendar

The Victoria MG Club has generously assisted our club with all of our previous JOTI slaloms by lending timing equipment and operators, cones, helmets, radios as well as helping to set up the course. We could not offer a sla-lom without their help. They hold their own slaloms each month during the sea-son and I would encourage all JCCV members who are interested to support their events. The dates for 2014 are: May 24; June 1; July 12 and Sept 6. All events will be run at the Speedway, which enables longer and more fre-quent runs than a parking lot can provide. If you have not yet tried slaloming this would be an ideal and friendly intro-duction. I hope to see you there. John

I have long been uncertain about the accuracy of all this talk about Climate Change, Global Warming and so on

and so forth. It is difficult to weed out all the political pos-turing, special interest bumpf, etc from the actual scien-tific evidence. However, once I viewed the picture below, with its clear message of changing clothing requirements, I became convinced that the world must, in fact, actually be in the process of becoming steadily warmer!

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FATHER’S DAY PICNIC AND ELEVENTH ANNIVERSARY OF THE

CLUB. SUNDAY JUNE 15th - 8:30 AM - BEACON HILL PARK

Father’s Day is Sunday June 15th and British Car Enthusi-asts will again be gathering for a picnic in Beacon Hill Park. This Father’s Day will mark our ELEVENTH anni-versary as a club. You are all cordially invited to join what we hope will be a great turnout of members of the Jaguar Car Club of Victo-ria. As in past years, a catered picnic brunch will be served at 11 AM. Food will be supplied by Thrifty Foods, including a variety of sandwiches, pastries, fruit and of course an anniversary cake. So please plan to attend and join in the celebrations. Here is what you need to bring: Your Jaguar to display, a chair for each of you to sit on, beverages, hot or cold, a contribution of $10 per person to contribute to the cost of the food. There is no entry fee and there will be no judging. Even if you don’t bring your Jaguar or cannot stay for the picnic, please feel free to drop by to share in the club’s anniversary celebration. We hope you will include this fun event in your Father’s Day plans. Please RSVP no later than June 8th by e-mail to: [email protected] or call 250-383-4643 and leave a message.

Please note: There is a new way we must use to enter the field. Turn off Cook Street into the Beacon Hill Park area on Park Boulevard, then turn left onto Nursery Road, which leads to the show field. (See map below.)

MOTHERS DAY! And a good day for an IMPROMPTU COFFEE KLATCH AT TURKEY HEAD AND THE OAK BAY MARINA COFFEE SHOP. What a great day, and what a great idea for an impromptu Coffee Klatch. Nine Jaguars and five non-Jaguars rolled into the parking area at Turkey Head. Lattes and coffees and scones were gathered up from the Oak Bay Marina Coffee House, and club members and some guests gath-ered in the bright sunshine to talk Jaguars and garages. Phil and Lois Smith were the happy campers of the group and looked a little more relaxed than usual because their search for a house with a good sized garage is finally over. They will be moved in before the end of May. Merritt and Bennie motored in with their classic Austin Mini. Ro-land Beaulieu arrived in his bright red 1960 XK150 DHC. Coffee Klatches for Roland are easier to get to now as he and Mimi have moved from Saltspring to Cadboro Bay. He spent some time talking to Bob Hughes about the classic overheating problem with the XK150. The final resolve will most likely be a new efficient aluminum radia-tor specifically made for that model. Happy cooler motor-ing! Tim Leslie-Spinks arrived in his truck and with his friendly dog, who was the hit of the gathering. Dorothy Moleski did a few demonstration manoeuvres on her spe-cial Knee Scooter after foot surgery. While she hopefully will not need it by July we did wonder how fast she could go in the slalom at Jaguars on the Island! We noticed 2 XK8s, an S-Type, Jeremy and Barb's E-Type, XJS, Marke and Carole's Porsche and others. The one thing we no-ticed is that few of us remembered to load up the trunk with our lawn chairs now the nice weather is finally here. A great fun sun morning.

************************************************************ Distracted driving is a problem. A highway patrol officer noticed a woman knitting while she zipped along in her Jaguar. She seemed oblivious to his siren and flashing lights, so he moved along side. “Pull over!” he yelled to the lady. “No, it’s a scarf!” she shouted back. * If at first you don’t succeed, skydiving is probably not for you.

Coffee Klatch (Impromptu) May 11, Turkey Head Story & photos by Wayne Watkins

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T his from CarsUK: Jaguar is to build six lightweight aluminium E-

Types this year to complete a run of 18 planned for con-struction in 1963, of which only 12 were built. The cars will be built in the Brown’s Lane factory in Coventry, where a small area of the buildings has been retained by Jaguar. The serial numbers will continue on from those of the original 12. The cost will be something above one million pounds, a good deal cheaper than the five million or so an original would cost. Jaguar will select exactly who gets to buy them, the idea is to see that they are kept in the UK and used at appropriate race meetings.

An original Lightweight E-Type

J aguar Racing Heritage entered ten classic Jaguar sports cars in this year’s Mille Miglia, the famous 1,000 mile Rome-Brescia-Rome road race (May

15-18). These include, among others, the ex-Sir James Scott-Douglas 1951 XK 120, the ex-Douglas Hamilton XK 120 and the ex-Stirling Moss Monthlery record breaking XK. There were three C-Types, and the “long-nose” D-Type. You may have heard of some of the drivers: Jay Leno, Jeremy Irons, AC/DC lead singer Brian Johnson, Martin Brundle, Bruno Senna and other luminaries.

The Long Nose D-Type during an earlier race

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A Foray into Fashion

On Thursday April 17th, the Sidney Pier Hotel staged a Gala Fashion Show in support of ORCCA – Oral Care For Children And Adolescents. Many local shops and businesses donated their specialties, and the hundred and fifty plus guests, including our members Carol B., Benni C. and Barbara W., enjoyed a wonderful even-ing of gowns, shoes, cosmetics, jewelry, modeling, music and hors d’oeuvres.

by Carol Bird

Fashionable Jaguar ladies

(Photo by Carol Bird)

*********************************************************** An Art Show JCCV members Graham and Linda Darby invite you to “Good Vibrations,” a show of Linda’s work at the Martin Batchelor Gallery, 712 Cormorant Street, Victo-ria. The show continues until Thursday, May 29th. Check out Linda’s website, www.artistlinda.com and read a review at and more artist info at: http://www.focusonline.ca/sites/default/files/Focus_2014-05_May.pdf It starts on page 32.

“Boogie Town” by Linda Darby 30 X 40 inches. Acrylic on canvas

JCCV BITS & BYTES Cowichan Valley Car Picnic Info: Dear Car Enthusiasts: We are writing to you to announce that the twenty-ninth annual Cowichan Valley Car Picnic will be held on Sun-day, August 10th this year. The location has changed. As a result of Brentwood College denying us the use of their fields, we will be holding the event at Frances Kelsey School. Directions and a map are below. We are excited about the new venue, there is plenty of parking for exhibi-tors and the public as well. There is some shady parking and lots of grass for picnics. The school is located on a busy road and near the local recreation centre so there should be good exposure. As well, we will be increasing our advertising this year in the local community. Car plaques and prizes will be available as usual. New for this year will be a car calendar, blankets and T - shirts. Watch for details on our web site. This year we will incorporate a display of local artisans such as potters, woodworkers, spinners, cheese makers, wineries, and the like. And of course, the Rotary Club will have its food cart on site. If you would like to bring some-one along with you to participate in the artisan show, or for more information, please contact David Knott ( [email protected] ) 250-743-9114 or David Crowe ( [email protected]) 250-743-2776. Our web site will be updated as plans develop. Please check us out at: http://www.cvcp.ca/ Hope to see you on August 10th.

South Cowichan Rotary

************************************************************** The McNabb Report Paul McNabb, the author of two detective novels involving a classic Jaguar (see the Feb, 2014 Island Growler) pub-lishes The McNabb Report on the XKs Unlimited website. The direct link is http://xks.com/p-24520-mc-nabb-reports.html or go to xks.com and look under “community.” Some interesting California Jaguar stuff there.

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Barn Finds

Terry Sturgeon has sent us these two “barn find” pic-tures, which he found on the Bonhams auction house website. It seems that they were in fact found in an Eng-lish barn, having been in “dry storage” there since the mid 1970’s. The accompanying blurb says they “…..are ripe for sym-pathetic restoration.” One might be tempted to feel sym-pathy for those tasked with restoring them. Further, num-ber 2 “….retains its original yellow colour scheme”. At least, where there is metal left which is capable of retain-ing anything. Now for the good bit: The red one sold for 29,900 pounds, or approx. Cdn $53,700; and the yellow-ish one for 32,487 pounds, or Cdn $59,300. But I suppose you can’t really put a price on the preserva-tion of such important examples of national heritage. So if you do have a rusting E-Type in your barn, talk to the Bonhams guy.

Hmm……. Pulchritudo in veritate

PLEASE SUPPORT OUR ADVERTISERS ! Don’t forget

to mention that you saw their ad in “The Island Growler”.

“Cogito, ergo sum” Marvin the Robot contemplates this pronouncement in the Jaguar Victoria showroom.

EDITOR’S NOTES Malcolm Baster

New Members Welcome

John Wilson Bob Taverner Brenda Jaques Ray Murray Monika Modrovic

We are still not getting out much, but I am pleased to say that Lucille continues to improve, though slowly. We did get to Victoria last week, though, to join Ken and Den-ise Cantor for a scotch at the Empress. Ken and Denise are from Edmonton, and were in Victoria to pick up Jim Provan’s XJ12, which they recently purchased. When we return to the Club scene, you may notice that I appear slightly thinner. This is probably because I have been doing much of the cooking here of late. Peo-ple attempting to lose weight would no doubt benefit greatly from my cooking. Lucille would like to thank the Club for the magnificent bouquet of flowers she received. Those flowers worked wonders for her morale at a very bad time. She is also very grateful for the cards, phone calls and good wishes she received from Club members. I am also grateful to have received articles and pic-tures from events we have missed, so these events could be reported on in The Growler. And special thanks to this month’s contributors: Lois Smith, Wayne Watkins, John Braybrooks, Isabel Weeks-Lambert, Marke Simmons & Carol Bird and Terry Stur-geon. Our “Words from the President” is very informative this month. We all know that we support Victoria Hospice, but we probably don’t know much about that institution. Graham and Anne paid a visit there, and Graham’s article gives us much useful and interesting information.

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T eeing It Up for Victoria Hospice. Don’t miss the 18th Annual Teeing It Up for Vic-toria Hospice Mixed Golf Extravaganza. This much loved event happening on May 25th at

Olympic View Golf includes a 4-person Texas scramble, buffet dinner and tons of great prizes. For more infor-mation and registration visit www.golf4hospice.ca

<>

9 th Annual Teeny Tiny Garden Tour - Sunday June 8th. Don’t miss your chance for a rare glimpse into some of Victoria’s smallest backyard gems when

a dozen garden owners generously open their gates in support of Victoria Hospice. Also included in this year’s tour is Abkhazi Garden which at only one-acre is a truly hidden treasure. Tickets $25, are on sale now at Thrifty Foods, Dig This, Capital Iron - Downtown, Mayfair Shop-ping Centre Concierge Desk and Victoria Hospice.

<>

S teve and Betsyn Clark Matching Gift Challenges Raises More Than $200,000! In the Fall of 2013, Steve and Betsyn Clark sent a letter to their close friends. It read:

“Dear Friend - This time of year, when leaves are turning and falling, and we’re looking to spend the coming holi-days with family and friends, it’s important to remember that for some, the passing of time means something very different. For people living with life-limiting illness and for the people who love them, each moment becomes a season to be savoured as much as possible, as long as possible. This is one of the many reasons why Betsyn and I support Victoria Hospice, and why we are asking that you help support it, too. Whatever you may think Victoria Hospice is, trust me, it is so much more than you could ever have imagined.” The letter issued a friendly challenge: The Clarks, along with two anonymous donors and the Marymax fund, would match donations up to $100,000. When the Clarks’ friends opened their envelopes, they also opened their wallets. In total, more than $200,000 was raised to sup-port Hospice’s end-of-life and bereavement programs. When asked why Steve and Betsyn chose to support Hospice, Steve replied: “Betsyn and I had a tour of Hospice and we were so im-pressed by the people that go to work there every day. They don’t treat their work as another day at the office. These people are defining their lives by the care and compassion they give to patients and their loved ones as life draws to a close.” The Clarks’ friends—many of whom are business peo-ple—knew that the Clarks would only ask for support for a charity they had researched and one where they had reviewed the financial statements. Steve confirms:

Hospice Events “People want to know that their money will be used care-fully and that it will go to the cause. That is the case with Hospice.” Tom Arnold, Senior Development Officer at Hospice, agrees: “People are surprised to learn that approximately one half of Hospice's annual operating costs are funded by donations. It is thanks to the generosity of people like Steve and Betsyn—and all Hospice donors—that Hospice can provide palliative and end-of-life care for people in Victoria who need it.” Thank you to Steve and Betsyn for putting together this special challenge appeal, to Marymax fund and the anon-ymous donors for creating the match, and to everyone who took the time to respond and make a contribution. (This article first appeared in the March, 2014 edition of Focus magazine. It was written by Marilyn McCrimmon.) ***************************************************************

Two of our members, Dr. Wayne and Mary Mulcahy, have been kind enough to donate tickets to the 2014 Indianapo-lis 500 on 25 May. Our plan was to offer the tickets at a discount to our members with proceeds going to JCOF and also to the Michael J. Fox Foundation. However, we had no takers Dr. Mulcahy is now willing to donate them to JCNA. We have up to 8 tickets available that are in a premier location in Stand A, on the straight away just past the starting line and across from pit row. If you want to look their location up online they are in Box 36, row SS, seats 9-16 (http://indianaracing.net/indianapolis-motor-speedway-seating-guide). Face value is $103 but equiva-lent seats are selling online for $150 and more. Please let me know if JCNA would like the tickets to either sell at a discount or give out. The terms of Wayne’s and Mary’s donation is that the tickets will be used by JCNA members only. Contact Me: Jay Hixson [email protected] These are on a first come basis as available. (Received by e-mail from JCNA)

Indianapolis 500 tickets!

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For Sale

1992 Jaguar XJS coupe, 4.0 litre 6-cylinder. Jaguar rac-

ing green. Victoria car, very clean, winter stored and reg-

ularly serviced at mechanic shop. Beautiful car, runs

great! 170,000km. Asking $8,500 obo. 250-741-0584.

****************************************************************

For Sale

1990 Jaguar XJ-S V12

Federal Jaguar XJ-S V12 delivered new in Portland,

Oregon.

King-of-the-Road V12 Jaguar.

Artic Blue over Savile Grey Leather Interior.

Completely original and presented in concours condition.

Exceptionally clean inside and out.

Federal-spec 5.3L V12 HE:

262bhp@5000/290ftlbs@3000

Fully functional, licensed and registered in Victoria, BC.

Sold as is, with all defects and no warranties.

Price is $13,000 CAD

Contact Richard Owen at 250 891 7475 anytime.

For Sale or Wanted Advertisements run for one issue at no charge. Place your ad with

the editor at [email protected]

For Sale 1962 Jaguar Mark II ........I have a fully original restored Green 1962 Jaguar Mark II touring saloon, completely new Connolly leather, Wilson carpet, new headline and inside door panels with only 33,500 miles. The car comes with original Bill of Sale as it was purchased by my Grandfather and has been owned by the same fami-ly since purchased. Never has been in snow and never been in an accident. This car has a number of awards and a feature article was just recently published in Old Autos Canada’s Antique Ve-hicle Newspaper last year. If there is any interest please contact for details Steve Armstrong Home..... 905-937- 0512 cell.......... 905-931- 0512 [email protected]

************************************************* Wanted Going thru another mid-life crisis. Need a convertible, not too old. Willing to go up to $40,000. If anyone is thinking of selling, give me a call: Bruce MacLeod, Mortgage consultant, Branch manager. Tel. 250 483-1380 Cell 250 514-7007 Fax 250 483-1377 E-mail [email protected] Web www.brucemacleod.ca

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Club will be on site with their Food/Lunch mobile unit. Registering your Jaguar for the show - All Jaguars are welcome from rolling restorations to daily drivers - what-ever Jaguar you have. The Registration form outlines the entry fees - $50 for Concours Judged category (both Championship or Driven) and $15 for the Enthusiast non-judged category. (Do note that entries for any of the JUDGED categories must be received by July 11th. All entries received after July 11 will be entered in the Enthu-siast Category.)

Saturday Awards Dinner - Served in the David Fos-ter Theatre Room in the new Oak Bay Beach Hotel. A wonderful dinner plus awards and trophies. $50 pp

Sunday - Scenic Country Prowl – and then BRUNCH. A great no charge country tour through scenic Greater Victoria ending at the Royal Colwood Golf Club for Brunch. Farewell socializing and prizes galore! Brunch is $25 pp. Sunday JCNA Slalom - After the farewell Brunch head out to Western Speedway and join us for a few runs in the JCNA Slalom on the parking lot. Novice or experienced - all are welcome. $30 per vehicle per driver. Pre-registration (included on the Registration Form) for the Slalom is strongly encouraged. NOTE: IF YOU HAVE ALREADY REGISTERED - MANY THANKS! If you have any questions about the Jaguars on the Island 2014 weekend by all means give me a call. Our committee is here to help. Wayne Watkins Chair, Jaguars on the Island 2014 Committee, Jaguar Car Club of Victoria Email: [email protected] Telephone: 250-652-1247

Have you registered for Jaguars on the Island yet?

Jaguars on the Island 2014 is fast approaching. July 25, 26 and 27 to be precise. We are receiving registrations daily, but we do still have room available at this time. Featured Jaguar models this year are: Saloons through to the 1961 Mark IX. ALL Jaguars of any model are wel-come from daily drivers to weekend cruisers to restoration in progress to newly restored. Some members are entering their Jaguars in the JUDGED (Concours) category which will be judged by the Concours d’Elegance judging team. We are receiving registrations for the Concours Champi-onship classes and also the Concours Driven classes. In the Championship classes the entire car including the boot (trunk) area and the engine compartment are judged. In the Driven classes the interior and exterior are judged but the boot (trunk) and engine compartment are not judged. The foremost purpose of the JCNA Concours is to encourage the owners of Jaguars to preserve, maintain and present their Jaguars in as clean and authentic condition as possi-ble. Many entries being received are registering in the Enthusi-ast category. The Enthusiast Jaguars are not formally judged but are all entered in the “Participants’ Choice Awards” where fellow Jaguar participants vote for their favourite Jaguar in different categories. Every Jaguar will be a star! Full Schedule of Events and Registration Forms for Jaguars On The Island 2014 are listed on the Jaguar Car Club of Victoria website www.jaguarcarclub.ca Once on our web site click on "JAGUARS ON THE ISLAND (JOTI)" in the Table of Contents on the left side of the web page. There you will see all the links to Registration options (both Online and Mail-In) and the weekend's Schedule of Events. Please note that registering Online is the sim-plest method. You will see on the bottom of the Online Registration Form the phone numbers of two of our com-mittee members who will be pleased to help you navigate the registration process if you need assistance. They are: Peter Jeffery 778-351-3843 or Merritt Chisholm 250-656-0030. Do not hesitate to call them – they will be pleased to help. The direct link to the Register Online site is: http://vijags.com/JOTI14/joti14Regn.html Our host hotel is the new Oak Bay Beach Hotel – Great response from Jaguar enthusiasts registering for Jaguars on the Island and booking at the Oak Bay Beach Hotel. The rooms at the special group rate of $207 have now been taken. As of May 16th there were 3 rooms left at the next step up at $239. For other rooms at their summer rate go to http://www.oakbaybeachhotel.com/ Tel: (250) 940-0317 Toll Free: 1.800.668.7758 Please refer to our web site www.jagucrcarclub.ca for the Schedule of Events which are:

Friday Welcome Reception - Oak Bay Marina Cof fee House. $20 pp

Saturday Concours d'Elegance - Windsor Park in Oak Bay. A tasty Box Lunch can be pre-ordered ($10) when you register. Alternatively, Central Saanich Lions

Breaking news! XKs unlimited has just signed on as a Major Sponsor of JOTI!

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May 2014

May17 Vancouver All British Field Meet, Van Dusen Gardens Info: www.westerndriver.com

May18 Vancouver All British Whistler Run Info: www.westerndriver.com

May 18 Turkey Head Coffee Klatch, 9am to noon

May 27 JCCV Regular meeting. Details page 11

May 31 - June 1

Pender Island Jaunt. There may still be room!

June 2014

June 6 - 8 Brits Best Classics, Radium Hot Springs. Info: www.calgarymgclub.org

June 7 - 8 Jags on Parade and On Show on the Meadow. Info: Pacific Jaguar Enthusiasts Group. Info: Art Dickenson, 604 465-7244

June 15 Fathers’ Day British Car Picnic, Beacon Hill Park. Info: www.jaguarcarclubofvictoria.wildapricot.org/Events See notice this issue page 12

June 15 Seaside Cruizers Show & Shine, Qualicum Beach. Info: www.seasidecruizers.com

June 21-22 Vancouver Collector Car Show and Auction, PNE Grounds Info: www.vancouvercollectorcars.com Jason Heard @ 604 220-2725 or [email protected].

June 22 CXKJR Summer Slalom, Scott Road Skytrain Station, Surrey. Info: Canadian XK Jaguar Registry, John Morse 604-594-8992

June 22 Turkey Head Coffee Klatch, 9am to noon

June 24 JCCV Regular Meeting. Details TBA.

June 29 Shawnigan Lake Show ‘n’ Shine, Shawnigan Lake School Info: 250 516-8533

Jun 29- Jul 11

Brits Round BC, Old English Car Club. Info: [email protected]

July 2014

Jaguar Events, 2014 JCCV Events are printed in bold

July 1 Gorge Road Canada Day Picnic. Info: http://www.gorgecanadaday.ca/

July 1 Saltspring Canada Day Show & Shine Info: www.saltspringcarclub.com

July 6 Sunday Prowl. Details TBA.

July 13 Brits on the Beach, Ladysmith Info: Old English Car Club Central Island Branch, www.oecc.ca

July 19 European Classic car Meet, in Calgary Vintage Sports Car Club of Calgary Info: www.vsccc.ca

July 20 Turkey Head Coffee Klatch, 9am to noon

July 20 Classic Car Field Meet, Elk/Beaver Lake Park, Saanich Victoria MG Club. Info: 250 598-1670

July 20 Fraser Valley Classic Car Show, Chilliiwack. Info: www.britishcarclub.ca

July 22 JCCV regular meeting, Details TBA

July 25-27 Jaguars on the Island Info: www.jaguarcarclub.ca

July 26 Western Washington All British Field Meet. Info: abfm.com

August 2014

Aug 3 Sunday Prowl. Details TBA.

Aug 8 - 9 Jaguars on the Green, Tacoma, WA Jaguar Drivers and Restorers Club of NWA Info: www.seattlejagclub.org

Aug 10 Cowichan Valley Car Picnic, Mill Bay Info: www.cvcp.ca

Aug 10 Oak Bay Collector Car Festival, Oak Bay. Info pending

Aug 14-17 Monterey Motorsports Reunion , Laguna Seca, CA Info: http://www.mazdaraceway.com/rolex-monterey-motorsports-reunion

Aug 15-17 Canadian XK Jaguar Register Heritage Classic Weekend, Langley. Info: www.jaguarmg.com See additional info and registration forms elsewhere in this issue.

Aug 17 Turkey Head Coffee Klatch, 9am to noon.

Aug 23 Rally in the Valley. Peachland Info: www.obcc.ca

Aug 24 QA Motorcar Gathering, Queen Alexandra Hospital grounds Info: www.gain-vi.ca

Aug 24 Concours d’Elegance of the San Juan Islands, Friday Harbor, WA. Info: www.sanjuanconcours.org

Aug 26 JCCV Regular Meeting. Details TBA.

Aug 30 Jaguar Owners Club of Oregon Concours, Portland International Raceway, Portland, OR Info: Bill Loppnow 360 253-9144

Aug 29-31 Portland All British Field Meet and Historic Auto Races, Portland International Raceway, Portland, OR. Info: Pending

September 2014

Sep 6 - 7 Langley Good Times Cruise-In, Langley Info: www.langlrycruise-in.com

Sep 7 Sunday Prowl, details TBA

Sep 14 An English Car Affair in the Park, Fort Rodd Hill. Old English Car Club, South Island Branch. Info: www.oecc.ca/sib

Sep 19-21 Sun Peaks Runt o the Sun, Sun Peaks Resort. Info: www.sunpeaksresort.com

Sep 21 Turkey Head Coffee Klatch, 9am to noon.

Sep 21 Toy Run, Vancouver Island Mustang Association. Info pending

Sep 23 JCCV Regular meeting, details TBA

October 2014

Oct 5 Sunday Prowl, details TBA

Oct 19 Turkey Head Coffee Klatch, 9am to noon

Oct 28

JCCV Regular meeting, details TBA

************************************************************ Ah, Spring…… A gardening tip: When weeding your garden, the best way to be sure if you are removing a weed or a valuable plant is to pull on it. If it comes out of the ground easily, it is a valuable plant.

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Alzheimer Foundation Poker Rally

Sunshine greeted the dozen cars on Saturday morning April 26th, for the start of the 3rd annual Alzheimer Founda-tion Poker Rally to Tofino. Drivers selected playing cards at several stops along the route to the Middle Beach Lodge on the oceanfront near Tofino. Traffic was light on Hwy 4, and even though the heavens let loose for part of the run, it was a very enjoyable drive. Five of our JCCV members participated; Julie B. and her friend Shei-la W. in JB’s award winning E-Type coupe, Sherry & Nigel O. driving their immaculate M/B SL600 roadster, and Car-ol & Marke S. following the group in their Monte Carlo SS. Nigel & Sherry won the second best poker hand and the 250$ prize, while Carol won the third best hand and the 100$ prize. The “Hard Luck” award went to a XK8 driver who drove through the deluge over the Pass to the lodge – with the convertible top retracted ! The windshield wipers were screaming at full speed to deflect the torrent, but he was dry when stepping from his XK8 at the Lodge [at least that’s what he claimed !] It was a fun friendship weekend, with much beachcombing, photography, shop-ping in town and lots’a good food and wine - as evidenced by the photo of Julie, Nigel and Dr. Marjorie Moulton,

Director of the Alzheimer Foundation.

Story and photo by Marke Simmons

Another Bit & Byte Mother’s Day………… May is the month in which we celebrate not only our mother’s special day, but also the role women play in our society. Just the other day I was reading of an archaeological discovery at an undisclosed Middle East location. Appar-ently a number of clay tablets had been found which, when translated, shed a bit more light on the creation of women. According to the writings on these tablets, it seems that Adam was toiling away in the Garden of Eden one day, when God suddenly appeared before him. “Adam,” said God, “ this garden is an absolute wonder. The fruit trees are straight and tall, the shrubbery so neat-ly trimmed and the grass so evenly cut. The flower beds are beautiful, the way you have matched and contrasted the colours is amazing. And those little fishponds with the connecting waterfalls are an absolute master stroke.” “Thank you,” replied Adam modestly. “I have tried my best to please you.” “You have certainly succeeded there,” said God. “I am very pleased indeed. So pleased, in fact, that I am going to reward you for your efforts. I am going to give you a companion. Her name is ‘woman’, and she is beautiful. Her face is a delight to behold, and her body is slim and graceful. Her long, soft hair cascades over slender shoul-ders, and her voice is as the happy bubbling of water in a little brook as it flows over stones. She will always try to make you happy, but if you are ever sad she will take your sadness to herself and make it vanish as the desert mist vanishes before the morning sun. She will cook you delicious meals, wash your clothes and clean your house, never complaining at all. And she will never protest your little idiosyncrasies and simple pleasures. She will make a warm bed with scented sheets for you, and in that bed she will raise you to heights of ecstasy that you never dreamed could exist. She will make your life complete.” “Thank you very much,” said Adam enthusiastically. Then a thought struck him. “But what will this cost me?” God calculated briefly, then replied “I will have to take your left arm and right leg.” Adam thought about this for a minute, then asked “What would I get for a rib?”

**************************************************

Roland Beaulieu’s XK150 at the April 11 coffee klatch

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