PARSHAS VAYECHI | 16 TEVES 5770 | 2 JANUARY 2010 When blessing these two grandchildren, Jacob again reversed the age order and blessed Ephraim before Menashe. These two acts of apparent favoritism are especially troubling in light of the lesson Jacob should have learned from the damage caused by giving an especially fine piece of clothing to his son Joseph (see Genesis 37:3). As the Talmud (Megillah, 16b) and the commentaries (see Tosafot, Shabbos, 10b) explain, the jealousy this aroused was the cause of the harsh treatment of the Jews in Egypt! In his work Emes L’Yaakov, Rabbi Yaakov Kamenetsky of blessed memory (1891- 1986) explains that Joseph’s children required special treatment and a special blessing because they were born in Egypt and did not benefit from growing up in Jacob’s spiritually pristine environment. Fearing that they would be adversely affected by their surrounding culture, he had no choice but to place them on par with his own children. His blessing, which obviously involved more than a physical share in the land of Israel, was the result of his keen foresight of Ephraim and Menashe’s unique needs. Rabbi Kamenetsky further establishes that when Menashe were born, Joseph himself felt a stronger attachment to Jacob than he did when Ephraim was born. At that point, Joseph was already getting comfortable in his Egyptian surroundings. These divergent perspectives within Joseph, as demonstrated by Rabbi Kamenetsky, were subtly evident in Ephraim and Menashe’s lives. The potential for a spiritually harmful impact from growing up in Egypt was therefore greater for Ephraim than for Menashe. It was with this in mind that Jacob felt compelled to bless Ephraim before Menashe. As parents, we are often confronted with situations in which choices need to be made between conflicting considerations. Do we need to give comparable privileges to each child or is it sometimes preferable to select one child for special treatment? Should we send the child to the school with a greater academic record or to the one where she is likely to have better friends? Should we move to the more ascetically pleasing neighborhood or to the one with a synagogue nearby? The different examples of Jacob seemingly playing favorites should serve as a lesson that there are no hard and fast rules. Generally speaking though, the overriding consideration is the long-term spiritual benefit for us and our children. Rabbi Gewirtz can be reached at: [email protected] לי יהיו ושמעון כראובן ומנשה אפרים... יברך בך לאמור ההוא ביום ויברכם א ישמך לאמר ישראל- מנשה לפני אפרים את וישם וכמנשה כאפרים לקים“Ephraim and Menashe shall be mine like Reuven and Shimon…So he blessed them that day, saying, ‘By you shall Israel bless saying, May G-d make you like Ephraim and Menashe’ – and he put Ephraim before Menashe.” (Genesis 48:5, 20) W hile on his deathbed, Jacob gathered his children to give them individual blessings. Before commencing these blessings, Jacob took note of Joseph’s two children, Ephraim and Menashe, and singled them out for a special privilege – that they would share in the distribution of the land of Israel like his own children, Reuven and Shimon. This special privilege accorded to Ephraim and Menashe is curious. Why would Jacob place two (and only two) of his grandchildren on par with his sons? Also noteworthy is the fact that he mentioned Ephraim before Menashe, despite the fact that Menashe was the older of the two. Parsha Perspectives RABBI ELI GEWIRTZ Mazel tov to Devorah and Moshe Chaim Halpern on the birth of their daughter, Simi. May they have much nachas from her!
Transcript
PARSHAS VAYECHI | 16 TEVES 5770 | 2 JANUARY 2010
When blessing these two grandchildren, Jacob again reversed the age order and blessed Ephraim before Menashe.
These two acts of apparent favoritism are especially troubling in light of the lesson Jacob should have learned from the damage caused by giving an especially fine piece of clothing to his son Joseph (see Genesis 37:3). As the Talmud (Megillah, 16b) and the commentaries (see Tosafot, Shabbos, 10b) explain, the jealousy this aroused was the cause of the harsh treatment of the Jews in Egypt!
In his work Emes L’Yaakov, Rabbi Yaakov Kamenetsky of blessed memory (1891-
1986) explains that Joseph’s children required special treatment and a special blessing because they were born in Egypt and did not benefit from growing up in Jacob’s spiritually pristine environment. Fearing that they would be adversely affected by their surrounding culture, he had no choice but to place them on par with his own children. His blessing, which obviously involved more than a physical share in the land of Israel, was the result of his keen foresight of Ephraim and Menashe’s unique needs.
Rabbi Kamenetsky further establishes that when Menashe were born, Joseph himself felt a stronger attachment to
Jacob than he did when Ephraim was born. At that point, Joseph was already getting comfortable in his Egyptian su r round ings . These d i ve rgen t perspect ives within Joseph, as demonstrated by Rabbi Kamenetsky, were subtly evident in Ephraim and Menashe’s lives. The potential for a spiritually harmful impact from growing up in Egypt was therefore greater for Ephraim than for Menashe. It was with this in mind that Jacob felt compelled to bless Ephraim before Menashe.
As parents, we are often confronted with situations in which choices need to be made between conflicting considerations. Do we need to give comparable privileges to each child or is it sometimes preferable to select one child for special treatment? Should we send the child to the school with a greater academic record or to the one where she is likely to have better friends? Should we move to the more ascetically pleasing neighborhood or to the one with a synagogue nearby?
The different examples of Jacob seemingly playing favorites should serve as a lesson that there are no hard and fast rules. Generally speaking though, the overriding consideration is the long-term spiritual benefit for us and our children.
ויברכם ביום ההוא לאמור בך יברך ...אפרים ומנשה כראובן ושמעון יהיו לילקים כאפרים וכמנשה וישם את אפרים לפני מנשה-ישראל לאמר ישמך א
“Ephraim and Menashe shall be mine like Reuven and Shimon…So he blessed them that day, saying, ‘By you shall Israel bless saying, May G-d make you like Ephraim
and Menashe’ – and he put Ephraim before Menashe.” (Genesis 48:5, 20)
W hile on his deathbed, Jacob gathered his children to give them individual blessings. Before commencing these blessings, Jacob took note of Joseph’s two children, Ephraim and Menashe, and singled
them out for a special privilege – that they would share in the distribution of the land of Israel like his own children, Reuven and Shimon. This special privilege accorded to Ephraim and Menashe is curious. Why would Jacob place two (and only two) of his grandchildren on par with his sons? Also noteworthy is the fact that he mentioned Ephraim before Menashe, despite the fact that Menashe was the older of the two.
Parsha Perspectives RABBI ELI GEWIRTZ
Mazel tov to Devorah and Moshe Chaim Halpern on the birth of their daughter, Simi. May they have much nachas from her!
V A Y E C H I Talking Points RABBI ELAZAR MEISELS
1. TEAR ME AWAY “And I, when I came from Padan, Rachel died unto me in the land of Canaan, on the road, while there was yet a stretch of land, before coming to Ephroth. I buried her there on the road to Ephroth, which is Beth Lehem.” 48:7
I buried her on the road - And I did not carry her even to Beth Lehem in order to bring her to a [settled] land, and I know that you possibly harbor resentment toward me for this. Know, however, that it was by the word of G-d that I buried her there so that she might help her descendants when Nebuzradon would send them into exile, and when they would pass by her grave, Rachel would emerge from her grave and cry and beseech mercy from the Almighty for them. – Rashi
Joseph understood that this was an excuse that Jacob was offering because he too knew that his mother passed away on the road. The reason she wasn’t buried in the Cave of Machpelah, however, was because Jacob did not wish to bury two sisters alongside one another, which would not have reflected well upon him or his descendants. Therefore he buried Leah, the first of the sisters whom he had married, in the Cave, and buried Rachel elsewhere. - Ramban
The Zohar offers a penetrating explanation for how Leah came to be buried with Jacob, instead of Rachel who ended up in a roadside tomb to be available for her descendants. Both Rachel and Leah shed tears of prayer to the Almighty during the course of their lives, and those tears left an indelible impact for all time. Leah pleaded to be able to marry a righteous person instead of Esav, her pre-destined mate, whereas Rachel cried over her inability to bear children. Therefore Leah earned the right to spend her afterlife near Jacob, and Rachel secured the ability to advocate on behalf of her children throughout their bitter sojourn in exile. Such is the power of sincere and heartfelt prayer that its effects reverberate for generations!
2. A FISHY BLESSING “The Angel who redeemed me from all evil should bless the lads, and let my name be called upon them together with the name of my fathers, Abraham and
Isaac, and may they be like fish, multiplying within the land.” 48:16
May they be like fish - Just as the fish are fruitful and multiply and are not affected by the evil eye. - Rashi
May they be like fish multiplying within the land – Interestingly, in all of the censuses that were taken throughout our years in the desert, the tribes of Menasheh and Ephraim did not number significantly more members than the others. It would appear from this that the blessing was not fulfilled. Jacob qualified the blessing with the words, “Within the land.” Therefore, throughout their time in the desert, this blessing was not applicable. It was only applicable once they entered the land, when they were told by Joshua to enter the forest and locate additional land for their inheritance. - Ksav V’kabbalah quoting the Gaon of Vilna
Why did Jacob choose to bless them like fish, out of the thousands of living creatures? The commentators explain that kosher fish are unique among kosher animals in that once a fish possesses the requisite kosher signs, there is nothing that can make the fish non-kosher. On the other hand, even if kosher animals possess the requisite traits, they can become non-kosher if they are improperly slaughtered, die without slaughter, or possess a critical defect such as a hole in the lung. Therefore Jacob blessed Ephraim and Menashe that they should be like fish, in the sense that they should never lose their pure status. How fitting it is that this is the blessing with which Jewish fathers bless their children on Friday nights and other special occasions.
3. GRAVE WARNINGS “And he instructed them and he said, ‘Behold I will be gathered unto my nation, bury me with my fathers, to the cave that is in the field of Ephran the Hittite…There they buried Abraham and Sarah his wife, there they buried Isaac and Rebecca his wife, and there I buried Leah.” 49:29-31
And there I buried Leah – With these words Jacob wished to establish that the last plot in the Cave of Machpelah was his and not Esav’s. He already buried his wife there and thus, there was
no way Esav could lay claim to it. – Rabbi Yosef Bechor Shor
A wife is considered one half of her husband. If the first half was buried there, it is only appropriate the second half be buried there as well. – Sifsei Kohein
Ramban explains that Jacob greatly feared Esav’s interference with his plan to be buried in the Cave of Machpelah. Although Esav had not lived a life of holiness, Jacob knew that in his death, he would wish to be interred with his holy ancestors and would stop at nothing to achieve his goal. Indeed, that is exactly what happened, and that’s why Joseph brought chariots and riders along with him when he ascended to Canaan to bury Jacob. Esav’s grandson attacked them and in the ensuing battle, many of his fighters were captured and brought down to Egypt where Joseph imprisoned them for his entire life. Miraculously, none of Joseph’s brothers or men were harmed in the battle. Upon Joseph’s death, Esav’s grandson escaped and fled to Rome, where he eventually became the monarch. He ruled upon all of Italy and built the first of the grand edifices for which Rome later became famous.
Dear Andrew, I wish you the best in finding another job soon. I know it’s still a difficult market, but those who trust in G-d are granted special kindness from Above. Your concern about moving in with your parents is very understandable. Nevertheless, I believe that with finesse, you will be able to bring your adherence to a kosher diet back home with you without difficulty. Here are some basic guidelines to follow: 1- Let your parents know up front that you have no intention to impose your beliefs about the importance of kosher eating on them. You should impress upon your parents that you understand that their kitchen will remain non-kosher and you are willing to make the necessary accommodations in order to minimize any difficulties that your newly chosen lifestyle may cause (as we’ll explain further). 2- Box your kosher utensils and store them in a place where they will not accidentally be used by someone else (and in a place where it will not be an eyesore for your parents). 3- Shop yourself for the special kosher foods that you will need. For example, you may use the fresh vegetables that your parents buy (with their permission). Ketchup, on the other hand, may not be kosher-certified. You
would need to purchase such items on your own. 4- Your mother is likely a typical Jewish mother and may want to cook a meal for you. You can assure her that it can easily be done, as long as you are present to make sure kosher procedures are followed. Done sensitively, this will undoubtedly make your mother more comfortable with the situation. 5- Kitchen clean up of your utensils and preparation should be done by you in a timely manner to insure that the integrity of your kosher utensils is maintained. Your mother will also appreciate your efforts in the clean up. 6- Inevitably, there will be questions that arise whether a certain product or procedure is acceptable. I recommend that you establish a relationship with a rabbi and explain to your mother why you may need to defer certain questions to him. Having a rabbi will hopefully ensure that differences of opinion which may come up between you and your parents will not affect the parent/child relationship. When questioned about a certain item or issue, you can simply say that “we” can ask the rabbi. It would be best if you can arrange a meeting between your parents and the rabbi – either in person or by phone – to establish the human connection and other guidel ines for mutua l accommodation. They will be more apt to
follow his rulings once they have a familiarity with him as well. 7- In terms of cooking in your parents’ microwave, stove top, and oven, I suggest you ask your rabbi to explain the technicalities involved in their use. You will learn that it all can be done without difficulty. 8- As a nice gesture, you may want to keep your menu as similar to your parents’ in order to reduce the disparity between yourselves. This can also be enhanced by purchasing plates and glasses that are somewhat similar to theirs, so that there is a certain uniformity at the table you share together. (Of course, your items should be inconspicuously marked so that there aren’t any mix-ups.) By handling this potentially difficult procedure with sensitivity and sincerity, your relationship with your parents will likely become even stronger. You might even be surprised to hear at some point that they would like to make their kitchen kosher! If that happens, Andrew, then we’ll know why you were temporarily out of work. Regards, Rabbi Reuven Drucker Rabbi Drucker can be reached at: [email protected]
KOSHER KITCHEN RABBI REUVEN DRUCKER
Dear Rabbi,
I recently became a victim of “corporate downsizing,” and for financial reasons, I’m considering a move back to my parents’ house. Here’s the problem: I recently started to keep kosher and my parents do not have a kosher kitchen. Do you have any practical advice that could make this work?
Awaiting your response, Andrew M.
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Then Jacob called for his sons and said, “Assemble
yourselves and I will tell you what will befall you in the
End of Days. Gather yourselves and listen to Israel your
father. Reuven, you are my firstborn…”
(Bereishis 49-1-3)
As the verse describes, Jacob intended to tell his children what to expect in “the end of days,” which as
the commentaries explain, refers to the point in time
when the exile would end and the Messiah would
arrive. The sentence beginning with “Reuven, you are
my firstborn…” rather abruptly ends the discussion
about the End of Days and describes the first of the blessings Jacob gave each of his children.
Based on the Midrash, Rashi explains this change in
course as follows: Jacob intended to tell his children when the Messiah would come, but G-d removed His
Divine presence from Jacob, preventing him from
sharing this information.
As the Midrash indicates, G-d only prevented (א
Jacob from telling his children when the exile
would end, not from telling them that there
would be an end to the exile. Other than satisfying his
children’s potential curiosity, why would Jacob have
wanted to tell when the exile would end if none of his children could possibly have lived until then?
TABLE TALK FOR DISCUSSION AROUND THE SHABBAT TABLE
RABBI LABEL LAM
Parsha At-A-Glance
When Jacob felt death approaching, he summoned his son Joseph and asked that he promise to bury him not in Egypt, but rather with his forefathers in Meoras Hamachpela. Joseph brought his two children, Menashe and Ephraim, to Jacob for his blessing. Jacob gave them equal status with his own sons, promising them that they too would be heads of individual tribes.
He also explained to Joseph why he had to bury Rachel near the road to Beis Lechem. He blessed Joseph’s sons, intentionally giving precedence to Ephraim, the younger, over Menashe, the elder. He then comforted Joseph, telling him that Hashem would eventually return the entire family to the land of their forefathers.
Jacob called all his sons together to tell them what would happen to them in the future. He blessed each one, revealing the essential qualities of each son, even rebuking some of them for traits of character which must be trained. He stressed again his wish to be buried in Meoras Hamachpela together with his parents, grandparents, and his wife Leah.
Jacob passed away at the age of 147. Jacob was mourned by Egypt for 70 days. Joseph requested that Pharaoh’s servants intercede for him with Pharaoh to secure permission for him to bury his father in Canaan as he swore to do. Pharaoh agreed. A great cortege including all of Joseph’s brothers and dignitaries of Egypt, together with many chariots and horsemen, escorted Jacob to his resting place. Seven days of mourning were observed en route. On the entire trip, only Jacob’s sons carried their father’s body.
The brothers all returned to Egypt. They now feared that Joseph will take revenge on them. Joseph told them that all which they had done had been destined by Hashem to keep the family alive. Joseph saw grandchildren and great-grandchildren of his own. Just before his death, he assured his eleven brothers that Hashem promised to redeem them from Egypt and give them the land which He promised to Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob. He asked them to instruct their children that they take his remains along to The Land of Israel when that day would come. Joseph died at the age of 110 and was buried in Egypt.
