Pattaya One Issue 3

A 38-year-old Russian property developer was found brutally murdered in mid-October, but the precise motive for the slaying has yet to be determined by police, even though arrests have been made. The decomposing body of Mr Victor Krishin, a Russian national, was found buried in bushland not far from the Silverlake Vineyard on the southernoutskirts of Pattaya after police were directed to the site by a man who was one of two men initially arrested following a shootout with officers in Banglamung. At a press conference conducted by senior police at the Soi 9 station on 21 October, three people were paraded before the media, flanked by heavily-

armed SWAT team members. Probably a bit over the top for a press conference, but it made for a good show. The three arrested were all Russian citizens and named as Mr Rashif Saganov, aged 36, Mr Dimitri Kochenko, and Miss Natasha Shepugro. They were charged with conspiracy to murder while the female was also charged with attempting to bribe a police officer with 500,000 baht in an effort to secure the release of the suspects. The money was displayed in front of the arrested trio, which might have been why the SWAT team was on hand, especially knowing how little journalists are paid.

SORdid MuRdeR Of RuSSiAN PROPeRty develOPeR

% There’s a baby on the back seat% Above Bawd on Baht Bus drivers% Tortured by a dentist% Why Pattaya real estate is a sound investment

inside this issue...

By Staff Writers

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OnePattaya 20

Baht

Fun Town’s most vibrant

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1 - 15 november 2010 Issue 3 www.pattayaone.net

Reasons behind slaying still being sought

>

Brutally murderedMr Victor Krishin

NoTIceThe British consulate in Pattaya will be closed due to

staff leave 8 - 19 November. During this time, the Consular Section of the British embassy in Bangkok will handle consular enquiries (tel: 02 305 8252) and requests for

notarial services (tel: 02 305 8351). For notarial services, our Bangkok staff will be able to advise you on the best way

to submit your documents, based on your circumstances. The consulate in Pattaya will reopen for normal

business on Monday 22 November.charged with murderMr Rashif Saganov

02 Pattaya one Fun Town’s most vibrant

Mr Krishin was initially re-ported missing on 14 October by his 70-year-old mother, who told police she had not been able to contact her son by mobile phone, which had been turned off. Police soon found Mr Krishin’s bank accounts were being accessed. Security camera footage showed two men making withdrawals from ATM’s. The footage was shown to Mr Krishin’s mother who could not identify the pair. Police then asked banks to

alert them as soon as Mr Krishin’s ATM card was used again. A bank in front of a Wat in Banglamung soon contacted police who arrived and began following a black sedan (just the colour you might expect) containing two men. When officers attempted to get the vehicle to pull over they were ignored and a chase ensued. One of the men in the car produced a gun and shot at police, who returned fire wounding one man. The men abandoned the car and attempted to escape on foot

but were quickly apprehended. One of the men was identified as Rashif Saganov. Initial reports suggested the two men confessed to having murdered Mr Krishin after being paid US$10,000 (approximately 300,000 baht) by a Mr Sergey Alexandrov, a 34-year-old Russian man who was Krishin’s alleged lover and business partner. They said they lured Mr Krishin to his real estate office in Soi 6, off Pratam-nak Road where they tied him up and took him to remote bushland. Here Mr Krishin was shot in the back twice and then strangled with a length of computer cable, just to make sure he wasn’t about to make a remarkable recovery. Police initially interviewed Mr Alexandrov but he was released. Then, on Thursday 21 October he was arrested and formally charged with conspiring to murder Mr

Krishin for reasons as yet unknown. Alexandrov was a director of the company established three years ago by Mr Krishin, but he claimed not to be involved in the day-today operations of the real estate busi-ness. He claimed he was going to meet Mr Krishin on the night of 14 October at the Hopf Brew House on Beach Road but was unable to contact his friend, whom he said he had known for 18 years. He claimed to have tried to ring his friend but Mr Krishin’s mobile phone was turned off. The Russian national who had been shot and wounded by police the previous day was released with-out charge. Police have seized ATM cards, bank books, company accounts, mobile phones and anything else they think might be relevant in solving the mystery of just why Mr Krishin was murdered.

1 - 15 november 2010 Issue 3

Sordid Murder of Russian Property developer

Early in the second week of October a not altogether uncommon event took place in Pattaya when a young Thai female, who makes her living entertaining foreigners in a pre-dominantly horizontal fashion, gave birth to a baby. This can tend to be one of the drawbacks of her chosen profession. In this case however, the baby didn’t wait until she had arrived at a medical facility, it decided a more dramatic entry into the world was in order and popped out on the back seat of a motor vehicle owned by a foreigner, while in transit to Banglamung Hospital. Once at the hospital one of the security guards at the Emergency section called out four nurses who quickly and efficiently took mother and the new-born baby into a ward,

“it’s something i ate,” famous last words before baby

arrives…in the back seat of a car

cleaning up the rather impressive results of the backseat birth as best they could with the utensils at hand. A local expat, named Dave, told Pattaya One he had been seeing the lady, Khun Anne, for a period of time, usually of a short duration. One day she told him she had fallen pregnant and suspected Dave

might well be the father. He wasn’t certain and made it clear he was not interested in becoming a parent, giving her 5,000 baht to organise an abortion. He believed she had done so and the pair remained on friendly terms, although they had not engaged in horizontal mattress dancing for a few months prior to the unexpected arrival of the baby. The morning of the unexpected delivery, Anne had visited Dave, wearing a loose-fitting and long pullover to hide the fact she was in fact still pregnant. While at his place Dave said, “she began getting stomach pains, she said it was something she ate.” He said the pains appeared to be gettingworse and he suggested a hospital visit was in order. By the time they reached the

ground floor, Anne was in consider-able pain and had to be carried into a chair in the foyer while Dave went away to borrow the vehicle of an absent foreign friend. Her mother, who lives in Naklua, had been sum-moned as well and arrived in time to accompany them to the hospital. This proved fortunate because not long into the journey Dave stated, “She began to scream rather loudly and then all went quiet. Her mother began saying ‘come out, come out’ in broken English, then I heard this little wail, looked around and there was this baby on the back seat.” A much-relieved Dave was happy to discover the newborn was 100 percent native to Thailand. It’s not sure if he will ask for his 5,000 baht back, or send the car cleaning bill to the newborn mother.

Major road re-surfacing work began in South Pattaya near the entrance to Walking Street on 15 October, a Friday morning (no doubt deemed an auspicious day, since it was just before the weekend crowds arrived). The work was set to run the length of South Pattaya Road from the junction with Beach Road and as far as Wat Chai Mongkol. Beach

Resurfacing work runs into the standard ‘unexpected’ hurdle

Road would be closed to traffic from Pattayaland Soi 2 but vehicles would be able to access South Pat-taya Road by way of Second Road with one lane being dedicated as a southbound lane. Officials assured the media the road re-surfacing would be com-pleted within seven days. The following Tuesday morning came

the news of an unforeseen problem, something to do with underground cabling. The Provincial Electric Authority (PEA) were contacted and said they would solve the unforeseen problem within 24-hours, thus delaying the re-surfacing by just a day. As it happened, the roadworks were completed on time and traffic is now flowing somewhat normally.

From page one

Let’s hope it’s not quick drying cement

Pattaya one 03Fun Town’s most vibrant

As we head towards high season, I thought a trawl of topics dealing with the traditional hot chestnut of thieving, drugged up, abusive, pugilistic, dangerously-driving baht bus nutters would be instructive. And so it was. If you never want to board one again. These topics usually descend into a flaming, name-calling morass, with posters arguing about the outra-geousness of being double-charged compared to Thais, and whether it is a matter of principle or cheapness to object. Another issue is what to do when confronted by a baht bus driver screaming at you in the street or otherwise threatening to kick the crap out of you for a variety of reasons. One post stood out on Thai Visa by Aussiechick who, a few years ago, was riding up front, with a clearly

ABoVe BAWDIN PATTAYA

By JOHN THOMAS our Internet Forum Snoop drunk baht bus driver. She asked him to stop at the Tourist Police headquarters, and asked him to wait while she went to ask the police to nick him, which they did, letting him sleep it off in their car park. Waatwang had an unpleasant experience, which serves as a timely reminder of the dangers of riding shotgun: “The one that stopped was full, but the driver said I could sit inside the cab. I speak passable Thai and we started chatting. Everything was ok until he started making advances and offered me B2,000 to go to a hotel with him!” They must earn more than we think, or he really fancied her. Sometimes I think posters bring ill-luck crashing down on their own heads, as they encounter more trouble in a week on baht buses than most of us do in a lifetime, collec-tively. One poster, Ulysses G, admi-rably exemplifies the other extreme and confessed: “I was always skeptical about Pattaya baht bus drivers being crazy until I discreetly flipped one the bird and he chased me for about 3 blocks the wrong way on Beach road in his truck…”! One poster, Jingthing, had problems with the baht bus opera-tors and loaders on Pattaya Second Road: “The loading man went to-tally postal on me….his alcoholism disease ravaged brain decided if I wasn’t getting on the bus he or-dered me to board, I wasn’t going to be allowed on ANY bus. He started

Thieving, Drugged-Up

Baht Bus Nutters

yelling at me, clearly ordering me to leave the scene of his sordid transport empire. “ I felt pity for Smellyfarang who experienced a trip on a busy after-noon, driving through heavy traffic: “I happen to glance down through the back window and notice the driver is not only “steering” with his knees, he has his head down and is intently concentrating on some mesmerizing task that requires not only both hands, but apparently his full, undivided attention so much that he couldn’t be bothered with such distractions as actually look-ing out the windshield. Apparently he decided that driving through heavy traffic was the ideal time to roll a cigarette.” SirPaul attracted a lot of flak for his argument that baht bus drivers

Sponsored by

should be tipped 10 baht for every journey. Then he revealed he was a London taxi driver, at which point his argument, that you should tip anything that moved, weakened somewhat under the weight of self-interest. Loong objected: “300 passen-gers a shift. If all tipped him for doing nothing extraordinary that would be 3,000 Baht every day, maybe 90,000 Baht per month. A good income for somebody whose only qualification is being able to drive.” Sure, but they could afford to splash out for more 2,000 baht short times with their sexy passen-gers at that rate. Barry M was “amazed that west-erners who would demand prison sentences for parents who fail to properly secure their children in cars at home jump, grinning like Cheshire cats, with their kids into the back of these farm trucks often driven by half drunk muppets with no concept of safety”. And finally, Pistolbelt confessed to “giving change in 1 baht coins. I always save them in my back pock-et for those bastards and sometimes only give them nine. I’m real nasty see.”

All comments or Web Board tipoffs gratefully received at [email protected]


Taken inside ‘Le Pub’. Yes, we did try it, and yes, it was rocket fuel. See A Fool in Paradise page 11


Squeamish readers may wish to skip this item. A friend recently needed a back tooth extracting and went to his usual small clinic in Pattaya, where things began taking a turn for the painful. First the dentist didn’t seem to know what she was doing. She went

Pete’s PeregrinationsBy Peter Lloyd

to work without anesthetizing his gum. When he howled in pain she anesthetized it, but unprofessionally and insufficiently, as he felt the fluid cascading down the back of his throat instead of going into his gum. Eventually demolition work be-came so painful that he had to beg for more anesthetic, which she gave him with reluctance, muttering “farang teeth very strong”. Twenty minutes later, frustrated that her full-on assault and feverish yanking had got nowhere, she began to smash his tooth. He could feel particles of it disappearing down the back of his throat as his mouth became yet more painful and ex-tremely bloody. Even with the water he said he felt he was choking on his own blood.

After half an hour of smashing, the dentist x-rayed the damage. To my friend’s dismay, he saw that all the exposed tooth had been smashed off completely, leaving the root intact. She decided to cut the root in half. When that didn’t work, she tried to cut it into thirds, and the anesthetic began wearing off again, at which point my terror-stricken friend gave up, one and a half hours after going into the clinic, in excruciating pain, and looking like he’s just been on the receiving end of a hostile inter-rogation at the hands of the CIA in a Pakistani jail. As he escaped from the clinic, he warned them not to bill him. He then drove himself to Bangkok Pattaya hospital, his face swollen and painful, his clothes, and now

his car, covered in slobbered blood. Lucky he was only driving in Pattaya, where such things pass as normal. At the hospital he was seen by a very skilful dentist, who had his tooth assessed, x-rayed and extracted, painlessly and professionally, within 30 minutes of him being in the chair, for the reasonable sum of 1,800 baht. He was warned that the carnage in his mouth was shocking and that the first dentist may have damagedhis adjacent, healthy teeth in her extraction frenzy. The dentist couldn’t tell until my friends swell-ing in the mouth and gums subsided. The new dentist also had to put six stitches in his mouth.

Ouch.

Dental Torture

The Green Fields of Issan


Nong Khai inf lation

Issan Non-Scam

I am writing this in Nong Khai where I have been recently been spending more time away from Pattaya. Whoever came up with the phrase ‘driving rain’ had a perverse sense of humour, I thought, as we drove from Pattaya last night, through at least seven hours of heavy rain, which made driving in the dark, on poorly lit, hazardous and water-flooded roads, aquaplaning in ‘driving’ rain, a pretty treacherous and stressful experience. Up in Nong Khai, the locals think they have struck gold with the announcement of a rail link from China to Bangkok which will come through the town in about 10 or 20 years time, if ever.

One of the joys of a trip to and from Nong Khai is the detours we take through the wonderful Issan countryside. The rich, varied greenery of its rice fields is always a joy to behold, although I never seem to be able to capture them well on camera. On our trip this time I was warned to be wary when filling my petrol tank, as the local rumour (or

This news has made their already inflated real estate prices now, ahem, go through the roof, with no ceiling in sight, as they add on a rail link premium to their asking prices, making them even higher than in Pattaya for shophouses and commercial premises. The way they structure their deals is also interesting. One owner told my wife on the phone (so Thai to Thai, not knowing I was involved) he wanted the already-excessively high monthly rent paid UP-FRONT, three years in advance, plus a huge security deposit for one small shophouse in the town centre.

Err, no thanks.

urban myth) was that some petrol attendants, in cahoots with a certain brown shirt organization, were slipping small bags of ya bah into petrol compartments after drivers had filled up, only for them to be stopped down the road by a spot check followed by a gargan-tuan backhander to allow you to continue on your way, if you were lucky.

I scoffed at this, but my wife took no chances and watched the petrol attendants like a hawk. Luckily, either as a result of her hawkish oversight, or simply be-

cause it was bollocks in the first place, we reached our destinations happily unimpeded by corrupt at-tendants, planted drugs, police stops, incarceration or bribes.

Contact me at [email protected]

Pattaya one 05Fun Town’s most vibrant1 - 15 november 2010 Issue 3

PrivateKris & Noi’s

Do you have a question about customs or culture, or perhaps just a general comment on life in Thailand? Email Kris & Noi at: [email protected] a Spice-BoyOn my first visit to Pattaya, I ate Thai food only in hotels or upmarket restaurants; otherwise I ate West-ern food. But now I’m here for a long stay and have a Thai girlfriend who says I am wasting money eating at expensive places, and it doesn’t taste as good either. She says that the best, real Thai food, is from the roadside foodstalls. This is the only country I’ve visited outside Europe, so the stalls look so unhygienic to me, what with all the heat and the insects, and also I am not used to spicy or hot food. I am keen to try proper Thai food as I intend to visit

here regularly; do you agree with her that street food is best, and is it safe to eat there?Donald In the same way that Thai restau-rants overseas change the flavour of their food to suit western tastes, so upmarket hotels and restaurants here tend to offer bland versions of the original fare. There’s no way that Hotel De Costly will risk having an unsuspecting tourist getting red-faced, breathless, and litigious over a chilli-laden dish, so if you want to try the authentic scran

you must be more adventurous. Let your girlfriend take you to the smaller, family-run restaurants that are plentiful in Pattaya. The food is excellent and cheap, and she can tell the cook how much seasoning to use; you may eventually be like most expats here, tucking in to the fully-seasoned nosh. As for food-stalls, try the ones where many expats and Thais are eating; they are great value for a quick and tasty meal. And food poisoning has some-times been suffered by customers of the world’s leading establishments, so it can happen anywhere. As you

don’t see many people collapsing in the streets by the foodstalls, the odds are that you’ll survive.

Barfine BypassI regularly walk around the shop-ping malls. I am often given cute smiles by beautiful girls. Are they just being friendly “Thai Style” with no ulterior motive or are they off duty bar girls? If they are off duty bargirls, can I bypass the bar fine system during the day? If they don’t work in bars, can I try my luck with-out getting slapped? I am not used to not paying.Creature of the Night.

When Thai women give that nice smile, it should be taken as just a friendly gesture to an obvious for-eigner, not a come-on. Too many mongers, who believe that all Thai women are gagging for an ageing farang to bed them, embarrass thegirls by approaching them and asking how much. Seeing as you always pay for your nooky you are obviously not a pinup poster boy, so better to stick with the baht for bang system. If a girl is a freelancer or an off-duty bargirl who fancies some extra cash, leave it to her to let you know she’s available. And of course there wouldn’t be any barfine.

58 the ranking Thailand was given out of 100 countries in the world in a survey by the United States-based Newsweek magazine in August. The factors taken into account were education (Thailand 57th), quality of life (55th), health (66th), economic dynamism (39th), and political environment (74th). The three worst countries were Burkina Faso, Nigeria, and Cam-eroon. Don’t think you’d get much of an argument from many people on those, although the Nigerians might suggest they rank highly in economic dynamism, after all, they put the meaning into the phrase ‘Nigerian Scam’. The top three ranked nations were Finland, Switzerland, and Sweden. Considering the large numbers of their nationals who come to live in Thailand one gets the feeling the survey might have been missing something.50 percent plus. This is the esti-mated percentage of people in the world who have never made or received a telephone call. Not one of them lives in Pattaya.85 the estimated percentage of ac-

cidents involving public buses and caused by the drivers of these ve-hicles being ‘careless’ in the period from January to August 2010 (ac-cording to Chairat Sanguansue, the Director-General of the Land Transport Department). Alarmed at these statistics it is said Land Transport officials issued an advice to public bus drivers telling them to control their speed, especially when it happens to be raining as slippery roads can cause accidents to occur more easily. Naturally, public bus drivers were amazed at this information and hadn’t rea-lised how dangerous wet weather could be, despite the fact many of them had been working at their profession for many years. Khun Somchai Likmaballsalot, a regular driver on the Rayong to wherever he finished up run, claimed driving a great big vehicle made him feel like a giant among minnows and he simply couldn’t resist the urge to ‘monster’ other vehicles smaller than him on the road. He said he used to be a mini-van driver but since upgrading to a public bus his primal urges have become more pronounced.

7 By the NUMBERS

28 1349 6

The first edition of Pattaya One made quite an impact for a start-up publication, as the following numbers show. Downloaded PDF’s from the Thai Visa website numbered 5,733. To put this into perspective, the physical print run for the publica-tion is 5,000 copies. The second edition of Pattaya One passed 3,700 downloads a week prior to this third edition going to print. Hits on the website, www.pattaya-one.net, numbered over 57,000 over a period of just two weeks for Issue 1 and over 25,000 in the first week of Issue 2 (as per the screen shots below). Our biggest problem has been organising proper distribution with

ADDING uP The NuMBeRS

some important outlets. We hope to have this rectified as soon as possible. In the meantime, hard copies are being widely distributed, however sales outlets are limited. In Jomtien, Pattaya One can be purchased at the newsagent in front of the Kasikorn Bank near Soi 3 on Jomtien Beach Road or the Foodmart supermarket on Thappraya Road near the junction with Thepprasit Road. In south Pattaya, the DK Bookshop on Soi Post Office has copies as do the two main news vendors on the soi. In central Pattaya, the publication is on sale at the newsagent in Tops Supermarket.

Issue 1 (1-15 oct)

Issue 2 from 16-21 oct

(5 days)


Let’s assume you have now built your road, avoiding the silliest of mistakes, and you now want to consider your drainage options, which SHOULD have been done properly when the road was being planned and built. But let’s say it wasn’t. And, for the sake of argument, let’s look at some examples from a randomly-selected road in Pattaya – say Thappraya Road, a paragon of road-building prowess. But there are a few tiny, almost imperceptible things to be put right on it, so let’s use them, although I don’t want you to think I am knocking that long-standing road project. Sufficient drainage is needed for any road. That should be obvious, right? And if you build a road in the tropics, you need a lot of drainage for heavy rain. Again, obvious.

How to Build a Road (Part 3) By Tar Mack

Drainage and Obstructions

Pattaya Focus on ......

If the road is on a sharp gradient, you need even more drainage to stop surface water running down the road, damaging the road sur-face, causing flooding at the bottom and mayhem and inconvenience to users and adjacent owners. Right? Not installing ANY drainage on the central reservation of a large road on a gradient going downhill

in the tropics, and relying only on inadequate, poorly-built, already-clogged grates in the gutters of one side, and stone-filled cattle grids across the road, would be a triumph of under-spending over common sense. Surely that would never happen here. And of course, this being a road, a dangerous place at the best of times, it would be far better if it was kept clear of life-threatening obstructions built INTO the road. Apart from potholes the size of World War 1 bomb craters, hapless motorcyclists and vehicles need to be on their guard not to hit anything such as the water hydrant (pictured), especially at night.I really hope they get it right this time

Clogged and inadequate NEW drainage

The Jomtien Somme: Road Drainage Problems of a Different Kind

Next Edition: traffic Lights and

pavements


A question I am sometimes asked by prospective real estate investors is “What kind of a return should I be looking for?” As with many questions, there is no simple answer. In fact, any proper response is conditional upon numerous factors, such as how much you are invest-ing, how much risk you wish to take and whether you are looking for capital appreciation or income? Important considerations include the fact that there are some good deals on offer due to the current slow market, which offer significant potential for capital growth over the relatively short term, but also the fact that the same economic and political factors that have hit the sales market have brought downward pressure to bear on rents. Thus, during the last couple of years rent for an average rental property has decreased by perhaps

talking Real Estate20 to 25%, which has obviously hit the income returns of many land-lords. However, it is also fair to say that at the same time interest rates have dropped dramatically so that money sitting in the bank has earned virtually nothing. Thus, even a 5% income return on money invested in real estate is much bet-ter than the 1-2% you will receive from a bank. Looking at the question from the perspective of a small scale investor, someone who is looking to buy one or two investment properties, right now a good investment would ideally have solid potential to earn both an income and provide capital appreciation in the foreseeable future. So far as income is concerned, a net annual return of anything in the range of 6 to 8% represents good business. Sometimes, it is possible to be in the right place at the right time and pick up a good investment property at a fire-sale price from a seller who needs money very quickly. In those circumstances, the low purchase price can mean that the percentage income return from

renting the place can be higher, typically in the range of 8-14% per annum, but normally an investor would need a little bit of good for-tune to find such a place. The reason is simple, namely basic economics. There is no shortage of real estate investors in Pattaya and so the demand for properties priced such that renting them at a market rent would pro-vide a net annual income of 8-14% is very high. Of course, they need to be properties for which there is a strong enough demand to ensure that renting the place would be relatively straightforward. To this end, location is important, as is the nature of the property and other considerations that I don’t have the space to detail here. As for capital appreciation, the situation is a little more complex because, although people tend to talk in terms of annual growth, real estate prices typically rise and fall quite suddenly. Thus, it is probably easier to work on average annual growth over a number of years. Personally, I believe that upon the

local market recovering, prices will quickly revert to where they were around three years ago. Accord-ingly, if you can buy a place at, say, 30% less than that, as and when the market recovers that should rep-resent your capital growth. If that happens in two years time, that is 15% per annum over two years, or in other words a very solid return. While any such analysis and attempt to put figures in place in-volves lots of ifs, buts and maybes, in general if you buy at the right price, right now you ensure you have good potential for solid capital growth. If, at the same time, you are earning a decent income of significantly more than your money would earn in a bank or in an al-ternative and similarly safe invest-ment, to my mind you have made a good buy. If you have any questions or queries in relation to the above, or if you would like to discuss any other matters related to the local real estate market, please call me on 087 137 0392 or email me at [email protected].

By Tim Gladwin, managing Director of Sallmanns

Real Estate Investment Returns

A personal injury lawyer’s dream – in another country


08 Pattaya one Fun Town’s most vibrant 1 - 15 november 2010 Issue 3


10 Pattaya one Fun Town’s most vibrant 1 - 15 november 2010 Issue 3


Last issue, I began the story of my recent trip to Vietnam and our rail journey to the coastal town of Vinh. We arrived on a Friday night and spent the weekend seeing the sights of Vinh. Not many. The beach, some 20 kilometres away, was large and uninhabited. The city’s only real claim to fame is that it is the birthplace of Ho Chi Minh. We paid a visit to the house where he was born which, naturally, has been turned into a shrine and tourist site complete with souvenir shops and memorabilia. Nonetheless, it was a revelation and the spirit of Uncle Ho has taught me the evil of my decadent Western ways and to de-nounce the US imperialists and all their running dogs. I saw the light. But being a card-carrying social-ist and Ho Chi Minh groupie didn’t last very long, and Monday morning we booked tickets on Vietnam Air-lines back to Hanoi for US$40 each. The north-bound train did not leave until 8:00pm and we did not fancy sitting around all day waiting for it. The only other option was the bus, but nobody in this town spoke English and we were worried about ending up on a small bus packed

with farmers, goats and chickens. Arriving at the small airport early, we consumed 21 cans of beer before getting on the plane and the stall-holder subsequently went on holiday with all the money he made. After the 45-minute flight on a small prop-engine plane, we headed to Hanoi’s Old Quarter tourist area to find a hotel. Un-beknownst to us, the place was packed with people celebrating the Moon Festival. (I have not-so-fond memories of eating Moon Cake in Hong Kong. Being politically correct, it has an acquired taste.) The narrow streets were so crowded we got out of the taxi and walked, hop-ing to find a good hotel nearby. Our luck was in as we quickly found a nice hotel for US$25 a night. After staying there for four nights we all agreed that the Rising Dragon Hotel II at 24 Hang Ga Street, only a short walk from the north-western side of Lake Hoan Kiem, was the best hotel in its price-range we have ever stayed in. The rooms were immaculately clean and comfort-able and ours came complete with a computer attached to the Inter-net plus an electronic safe for our valuables. Best of all were the staff.

Most spoke English and could not have been more friendly, helpful and cooperative. All went out of their way to make us feel welcome and comfortable. For example, the rooms come with free breakfast and the dining room opened at 7:00am. When we left, the taxi picked us up at 6:30am so the kitchen staff pre-pared three takeaway snacks for us. We did not ask, but it was very much appreciated. (Wouldn’t happen in Pattaya!) If you ever find yourself in Hanoi looking for a budget place to stay, don’t go any further than the Rising Dragon Hotel II. (Checking their website at www.risingdrag-onhotel.net, I could not find room rates as low as US$25 so we must have arrived at the bottom of low season.) Hanoi’s Old Quarter has a very ‘Chinese’ feel about it, with narrow congested streets and shop houses selling anything and everything. Shops selling similar or identical items were all clustered together; one street selling coffee; one street selling herbal medicine; one street selling shoes and one selling ciga-rettes, etc. That is the Chinese way. Speaking of cigarettes, I am a smoker but I am very careful about smoking in the company of other people. At one restaurant I noticed an ashtray on the table and asked the head waiter if it was alright to smoke. His reply was, “Of course!”

I smiled at the thought there are still places in this world where smokers are not treated as if they have leprosy. During our four days we walked almost every street of the Old Quarter. We saw vendors selling tickets in the Vietnam lottery (the standard loophole for countries where gambling is illegal) with a first prize of 10 million dong or about US$500. Now, I don’t know about you but I’ve always equated winning the lottery, any lottery, with a lifetime of financial security. However, winning 500 bucks is probably not sufficient to tell the boss to “take this job and shove it!” Perhaps those in charge still retain their class revolutionary dogma and don’t want to see one of their proletariat supporters suddenly gain wealth and turn to

the other side. Such a small prize guarantees no chance of that. One of our goals was to find a good bar where we could while away our non-cultural time. Actual ‘bars’ were scarce and the Internet-advertised foreign or expat bars were expensive. Those at our eco-nomic level came in the guise of restaurant-bars or travel agent-bars. Really cold beer was out of the ques-tion and it was invariably served between cool and room tempera-ture with a bucket of ice. We did find one friendly bar, called Le Pub, which served cold beer. We spent a couple of pleasant evenings there. Late one afternoon we stumbled upon Easy Rider Bar which was large, well appointed and totally devoid of customers. Stopping in for one drink, we asked the waiter if the place ever got busy and he said yes, but only after 9:00pm. Heading back at nine o’clock we found he was right; it was packed with revellers all drinking, dancing and having a good time. The problem was, they were all male. It quickly became obvious that Easy Rider is a very popular gay bar. Check bin! In the final instalment next issue I will describe some of the tourist sites in this historic capital. In between bar searches we did manage to get to a couple of interesting places.

… to be continued.

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To pinch an idea from P.G.Wodehouse, spotting the difference between a Pattaya gay queen with a grievance and a ray of sunshine, is not an easy task; such is the relish with which the inevitable tirade is launched. The opportunity to bitch is rarely missed. The bitching is not just bitching. It is elevated to the status of high art and demonstrates aneloquence that is universally cov-eted, admired and feared. The waspish wit is cloaked in a humour that is particularly gay, particularly rapier in thrust and particularly devastating in effect. The recipientis struck dumb. Stunned into speechlessness. The victim will have to withdraw, retreat and may-

entertain the troops I could make them shut up and look.’ But the bitch is something more than simply demanding attention. Wil-liams continued, ‘People need to be peppered or even outraged oc-casionally. Our national comedy is packed with earthy familiarity and honest vulgarity. Clean vulgarity can be very shocking and that, in my view, gives greater involvement.’ People love to be shocked. Whether it is the shock of the new, the latest horror flick or a bitch in full flow. It is funny. And it always carries the truth. Seek out and celebrate that legion of Pattaya bitches. Buy them a gin (or four) and then provoke them. Settle back and enjoy the show. But the last word has to go to dear Oscar, who, on his deathbed in a cheap French hotel, said to Lord Alfred Douglas, ‘Oh Bosie, Bosie, look at that wall-paper. One of us will have to go.’

James Barnes is Editor of Thai Spice Magazine.

the Bitch is BackBy James Barnes

be, just maybe, come up with the witty repost after several stinging hours of humiliated reflection. Consider the overweight indi-vidual who had provoked a bitch, only to be told that it was obvious he had been poured into his clothes and had forgotten to say, ‘when!’ Or the hapless soul who was bitched with: ‘She wore far too much rouge last night and not quite enough clothes. That is always the sign of despair in a woman,’ delivered by that gay emperor of the acid drop, Oscar Fingal O’Flahertie Wills Wilde, who claimed that, ‘I have the simplest tastes. I am always satisfied with the best.’ And there

Pattaya: One Rainbowreally is no answer to that. To label this bitching as merely urbane is to understate in an at-tempt to disguise surrender. It is the waving of a white flag to the Everest-like mountain of the un-assailable put down. It may also be a signal of envy. ‘I wish I’d said that.’ ‘You will, you will.’ The accom-plished bitch is envied and dreaded in equal measure. The sharp word of mouth being far mightier than the blunt instrument, it is no sur-prise that the gay queen has honed this weapon to lethal affect. The late, great, British comedian, Kenneth Williams saw himself as a roving mosquito, choosing his targets and was a consummate ex-ponent of the withering word. This self-confessed follower of Sir Noel Coward (no slouch in the bitching department, himself) admitted that, ‘If I got up on the stage to


If imitation is the sincerest form of flattery, then Duncan Stearn, the intrepid creator of NIGHTMARCH should be very flattered; or, may-be he should just feel ripped off. I guess he can make the call. In any case, this will be the premier edition of a new feature in PAT-TAYA ONE that will, hopefully, do for (or to) the gay nightlife scene what NIGHTMARCH does for the straight scene. Scores of gay bars and venues can be found throughout Fun Town, but are mostly clustered in a few areas. Not far from Walking Street, there is a plethora of gay go-go and host bars on Pattayaland Sois 1-3. (Pattayaland Soi 3 is the original ‘Boyz town.’) You’ll find a variety of boys to suit most tastes. How-ever, if you’re into katoeys (lady-boys), you might find them in short supply here. Boyz Boyz Boyz in Boyz Town, one of the originals, is still going strong. They recently in-troduced a new ‘sexy all male erotic

show’ at 10 pm called ‘Bad Boyz.’ A recent visit revealed good danc-ing that was a bit revealing. You can run across the street after the show and catch the boy aquarium and cabaret shows at the Copa, starting at around 10:30 pm. The cabaret show has lots of lip syncing and dancing, if that’s your thing. The boys in the swimming tank put on nicely choreographed routines, but unfortunately, they don’t per-form au naturel. funny Boys, on the same soi, is a lower key go-go bar featuring a large variety of boys, comfortable seating and low key music. Panorama, a big and very popular host bar, has many hand-some, masculine young men to serve your alcoholic requirements and other needs. Nearby, Oscar’s host bar is a quiet, recently reno-vated place to relax with the hosts and have a drink. Do drop into the Café Royale, which presents the hunky and popular Filipino singing sensations, el duo. Pattayaland Soi 2 features three go-go bars. A-Bomb is a large emporium, specializing in big, muscular boys. Wild West Boys has a nice variety of young men dancing in sexy briefs. They have two shows nightly at 10:30 and midnight; and a special party and show on the 29th of each month. The recently opened pole dancing establishment, Happy Place, for-

merly Bubble Boys, has shows on weekends. Showing some sparks of innovation, the bar is presenting ‘Boy Bingo’ on the 22nd of November, in which the winner gets to choose a lovely ‘prize’ of his choice. They even provide the gratuity for the aforementioned prize.UPSTAIRS/DOWNSTAIRS: Pattayaland Soi 1 presents a string of go-go bars, on both sides of the soi. X-Boys and New dynamite(which is upstairs) have interesting shows every night. Following a couple of raids by Pattaya’s Finest, the shows are slightly less raunchy than before. Recently, X-Boys presented a thrilling, ‘B-Boys’ per-formance. These guys could re-ally move. Sawatdee Boys has a cabaret show on weekends. You can stay on the soi all night and barhop to the various other go-go estab-

GAYMARCHEmail: [email protected]

11 November (thursday) The Royal British Legion, Thailand Branch, will be holding their first Service of Remembrance in the grounds of St Nikolaus Church on Sukhumvit Road (heading north, just past the lights at Central Pattaya Rd), starting at 10:50 am. Contact Bert to arrange seating at [email protected] or drop in to Tropical Bert’s, Second Road near Soi 6/1. The service will be open to all nationalities and all faiths and will be short and simple. Wreaths will be laid by a number of groups inside the church. Outside the church will be a Garden of Re-

membrance where people may place a small wooden cross with the name of a loved one they may have lost. You do not need to have been a member of the British military to join the Legion. Formed in 2007, they hold gatherings every Sunday at Tropical Bert’s from 2:00pm onwards.

uPcoMING eVeNTS

lishments, including lucky 777, dream Boys, Kawaii and Cupid doll Boys. A small go-go bar, between Sois 2-3, is vassa Boys. A recent perusal revealed quite a few cuties and a dearth of customers. You’re sure to find a young man whom you’d like to get to know better at one of these venues. Expect to pay 150 to 200 baht for liquid re-freshment in the bars that present special shows. The other main gay districts, Sunee Plaza and Jomtien Com-plex will be covered more fully in future issues. A couple of quickies: Happy Boys, on Soi Yensabai, near Sunee Plaza, will be celebrating the manager, Khun Wat’s birthday with free food and cake on Satur-day 6 November. Wan’s Café has relocated to the old Memories Bar. They’re now in Sunee Plaza.


Some readers may not be familiar with the word “Tinglish.” It refers to a hybrid kind of English often spoken in Thailand. Just as we have Hinglish (Indian English, achhchha!), Singlish (Singaporean English, lah!), and Jinglish (Japa-nese English, deska!), and a host of other inglishes, so we also have Tinglish: Thai English, spoken with Thai pronunciation, intonation, and sentence patterns. It is not my purpose here to make fun of the English spoken by Thais whose mastery of the language is in-complete. Everybody has to struggle when studying a new language, and if the atrocities which we foreigners commit against the Thai language could be catalogued, they would fill a far larger volume than any that could be devoted to Tinglish. (Test for the reader: Try pro-nouncing the name of the Thai prime minister, and see how well you do. His name is Abhisit Vejjajiva. An approximation of the correct pronunciation comes at the end of this column.) Tinglish can cause misunder-standings which are often amusing, and I propose to list a few. My source for these anecdotes is a dear friend and mentor, Fardley Nerdwell, whose girlfriend, Noy, provides him with a steady supply of Tinglishisms. “Take the movie ‘Iron Eagle,’” Fardley told me one day. “Noy

tHaI LiteAdvEntuREs In tInglIsh

thought it had something to do with ironing an eagle, as you would iron a shirt. She wondered how the eagle would react.” “Probably with considerable outrage,” I surmised. “One of her favorite singers is Juttin Timmerlay. Bet you can’t guess who that is.” That was easy: Justin Timberlake. “There’s also the movie star Boot Weelit.” That was easy, too: Bruce Willis. “Shot Put,” Fardley continued. “Guess who that is.” That one stumped me. It was George Bush. “One day she had to go to the hot peter to see a friend. It took me some time to figure that out. She meant the hospital.” “I wonder how the two of you manage to communicate at all,” I said. “It can get frustrating,” Fardley admitted. “The time I had the most trouble understanding her was when she came back from a trip to Hua Hin with her girlfriends. I asked what she had liked best about Hua Hin. She said, ‘I like hot.’” “Hot,” I echoed. “You mean she liked the warm weather?” “Nope. Guess again,” Fardley said. “Hot food,” I ventured. “She ate some spicy-hot food there and liked it.” “Nope. Try again.”

I was baffled. “I like hot.” What could such a cryptic utterance possibly mean? The most sophis-ticated linguist, the most skilled cryptanalyst in the bowels of the CIA, would tear out his hair in frus-tration if he encountered this enig-matic statement in a coded mes-sage intercepted between terrorist groups. “There’s a town named Hot up around Chiang Mai, but you said Noy was in Hua Hin,” I said. “Right. Think, man! When you go down to the beach at Hua Hin, what’s the first thing you see?” I thought. “Well, you see ponies on the beach giving rides to tourists.” “Exactly. ‘Hot’ means ‘horse.’” “Ah,” I said, enlightened. “So Noy liked riding the horses on the beach.” “Sometimes she inadvertently warns me against making a wrong decision,” Fardley said. “Once we were driving along and she sud-denly said, ‘One woe for life.’ I was startled. At that very moment I had been daydreaming, wondering if I should ask her to marry me. And now, like a thunderbolt, the possible consequences of such a foolish decision came crashing down around my ears. If I married Noy, quite possibly I would have ‘one woe for life.’” “Nice of her to warn you,” I said. Fardley chuckled. “Yes, but it was unintentional. She had merely

been reading a sign on the back of the car in front of us. It was a Volvo, and the sign read ‘Volvo for Life.’” “That’s a new one,” I observed. “I’ve heard ‘Volvo’ pronounced ‘wowo’ before, but never ‘one woe.’” “There’s also a Khorat Hotel in Bangkok, and a famous country-and-western song called ‘Writing Bahboo.’ Bet you can’t tell what those mean.” I was stumped again. It turned out that the hotel was actually the Conrad, and the song was “Light-ning Bar Blues.” “One day she was gazing into a mirror and looking disconsolate,” Fardley went on. “She sighed, ‘I am owned!’ I was puzzled. Owned? By whom, pray? Did she find our relationship confining? Had she given her heart to somebody else? Had she been sold into slavery? But no, nothing so dramatic. She meant ‘I am old!’ At the advanced age of 24 she was imagining bags under her eyes.” “Better to be old than owned,” I philosophized.

S. Tsow can be flamed, preferably in Tinglish, at [email protected]. (P.S. The name of the Thai prime minister is pronounced, not AB-bee-sit Vej-a-JEE-va, but, approxi-mately, Ah-PEE-sit Weh-chah-chee-WAH.) By S. Tsow

PAGe

13 GIRL

Secretsis not just a

restaurant and hotel, it also

features an array of coyote dancers

and hostesses.



As if proof was needed that Soi Cowboy is very much the expats’ favourite playground, when the heavens open early evening, the soi is in a quiet evening. Even the most popular bars which can have 50 or more customers at 8:00 PM may be lucky to have a handful of check-bins out when early rain strikes. It takes more than a monsoon down-pour to keep visitors away from the bars but for expats in a city where transport can snarl up when the heavens open, an early evening downpour can be the difference between staying in or going out. Afternoon showers and rain after 8:00 PM have much less effect. What bar owners hate the most is when rain starts around 6:00 PM and their expected evening take can drop by 50%. Entrepreneurial tuk-tuk drivers stationed at the soi 23 end of Soi Cowboy have been charging those punters who have braved the rains a baht a meter, 50 baht for the 50 odd metre distance to a bar’s front door. It’s a small price to stay dry.After many delays, Carlsberg finally became went on sale again in Bangkok. At this stage it is only available in draft and interestingly, it is only bars in the farang areas offering it.Sukhumvit soi 5 is becoming much more colourful these days, and you will see no more colour than in the small, open bar with a spacious area out front, just next to Foodland, adjacent to the steps going up to Country Road. Like the bars in Sin City, Bangkok’s bars are seeing a new type of visitor.if you take the bus from Pattaya to Bangkok’s Ekamai bus station, don’t be surprised if a man in a

PoSTcARD FRoM BANGKoK

By STIcKMAN

brown uniform is waiting at your destination to welcome you to our fair city. Part of his welcome routine will be a check of not just your belongings, but of your per-son. Bangkok’s studious officials seem most concerned that visitors from Pattaya may have the sort of contraband on them that could sully the pure reputation of the Thai capital. If you have no interest in being welcomed, note that the bus from Pattaya head to Ekamai stops 4 times en route, the last at the Onut skytrain station, about 2 km east of Ekamai. You can jump off there and then either get on the skytrain or jump in a taxi and avoid the welcome committee.Rugby fans might prefer to remain in Pattaya when big rugby internationals are taking place. With seemingly more cable TV options in Pattaya than in Bangkok, there is more chance of catching your favourite match live in Sin City. None of the networks broad-casting in Bangkok have any live international rugby scheduled. The fixture between the All Blacks and the Wallabies in Hong Kong confirmed many Bangkok-based ex-pats’ worst nightmare - the match did not appear on any local televi-sion channel’s schedule.Puffery greets you at Crossbar with the sign outside announcing “probably the best pub in Sukhum-vit”. That honour is up for debate, but the landlord is doing his best to make the claim true, introducing a new pub grub menu with traditional pub favourites, such as scampi in a basket, chicken in a basket, ploughman’s lunch, cottage pie and there’s even some Indian dishes to keep the Brits happy!

stickman runs a popular Bangkok site at www.stickmanBangkok.com

Soi cowboy in the rain



N ghtmarchBy Duncan Stearn email: [email protected]

Another good walk spoiled: The golfaholics of Fun Town will be engaging in a series of golfing tournaments between 1 and 12 November with sponsors including Babydolls and Mistys go go’s (both in Soi 15, off Walking Street), the flB lounge lizard libation room (Walking Street), Solar Golf, Magna Carta and Pattaya Addicts. Babydolls is the first off the rink, starting with their annual golfing day on Monday 1 November at Siam Plantation. Apparently it is conducted under a Texas Scramble format (which golfers probably understand, but sounds suspiciously like a white-ball version of the gunfight at the OK Corral). More importantly, there will be a party in the bar afterwards to which non-golfers are of course welcome. Then, on 3 November it will be time for the ninth edition of the Pattaya RideHer Cup, starting at 10:30am at Burapha. After golf, dinner is dished out News Café before a party in FLB. All the events for the series are organized by Solar Golf who can be contacted by email: [email protected] under starter’s orders: For Australians (and others who like to watch good quality horse racing) it’s that time of year again when the Melbourne Cup is run, on the first Tuesday in November, which in 2010 means on the 2nd. There are plenty of places to watch the action: your own armchair on Aus-tralia Network if you want to stay at home. If you also hanker for a bit of atmosphere then you won’t do much worse than head on down to the Boxing Roo beer boozer and bookies parlour (Third Road, op-posite Soi LK Metro and Boutique Sexy) anytime after about 9:30am and catch all the action of race day. Uncle Kenny (he’ll be the one in the pork pie hat and looking like Flash Harry) will doubtless be able to ac-commodate those keen students of equine form who wish to obtain ‘a quotation’ about any chaff bandit competing on the day. As usual the Boxing Roo will be offering free food and other prizes to punters throughout the action.

A diet of hard tak and tacky: The Baby Boom go go in the small lane off Soi Buakhow and oppositethe Sawasdee sleeping establish-ment opened about a year ago and, somewhat surprisingly, is still op-erational. I doubt they have a lot of repeat business unless the odd punter falls in lust with a specific damsel in financial distress. This is not a place where you would imag-ine customers become regulars. The décor has been drawn from the low end of the Early Garish Period and is already showing more wear and tear than a clapped out Skoda on the Paris to Dakar rally. The music, of course, is too loud and seems to consist of DJ Whatta Spastic and his Brain Dead Band performing 69 different mixes of their hit ‘What Sound is this?’ (as high as 9,733 on the Kazakhstan charts, with a bullet and a suicide bomber). The dancing maidens numbered about eight or nine, so I suppose having three on stage at any one time is about the right rotation rate. To be fair, the place does have a couple of reasonable lookers and the girls are friendly enough in that ‘buy me cola, darkling’ way so obvious in a Thai-run wallet-emptying establishment. There were a few punters in the place and I watched as one older man clearly had a good time with one of the damsels. While he was paying for his drinks (including libations for the lady) the mamasan was all smiles and unctuous smarm, but he clearly didn’t leave a big enough tip because as soon as he had left the premises she almost snarled as she uttered the immortal word ‘keenio’ (‘cheap Charlie’). The bench seating against the side wall facing the small dancing stage must have been purchased

from the Rigor Mortis company from their used coffin division, or perhaps taken from the grounds of the Million Years Stone Park. It would make a third-class carriage seat in a State Railways of Thailand bogie seem like you being conveyed on a cushion of air. Talk about add-ing a new meaning to ‘hard assed’. There’s a wonderful word called ‘denature’, which means ‘to deprive of essential qualities’, and Baby Boom can certainly lay a strong claim to being the number one ticket holder in the Denature Club. A gem or two in the sludge: The New Star go go is the first den on the left-hand side in Soi Diamond if you are coming in off Walking Street. It’s easy to walk past, al-though the policy of having a couple of usually well-endowed and pass-ably attractive dancing damsels sat behind the curtain and ready to display their assets to passers-by usually means the place gathers a reasonable crowd of punters most nights. A fairly short and narrow den it only takes seven or eight girls and three or four bums on seats to make it look busy. The stage has three to five girls shuffling about while two damsels soap each other towards the centre. The preferred discounted thirst quencher is draught amber for 55 baht while lady drinks are a fair 110 baht (for a proper glass). Of the 12 or so girls I saw on a recent visit, two or three were worth a second look while about half were pot boilers or potential ‘before’ adverts for Weight Watch-ers. There is a room upstairs, which can be rented for 350 baht for a short period of time (one hour), while the bar fine is 600 baht. The damsel of your desire wants you to part with 1,500 baht for an hour of her precious time. Doing the math

and there is no doubt better value for the nocturnal emission baht can be found elsewhere.the Secrets of Success: It oper-ates one of the busiest and infor-mative websites and forums in Fun Town (and is an advertiser with this publication), and last September celebrated its fourth anniversary with a typical standing-room only bash. Two months on and the Secrets lounge lizard libation room is gear-ing up for what the management hope and expect will be a bumper high season. Certainly my most recent, albeit brief, visit made me aware there has been a concerted effort to recruit some new faces for the coyote dancing duties. As I wrote in a column for an-other publication back in Septem-ber 2006, just after Secrets opened its doors, ‘Naturally, being open-ing night, the place was fuller than a Pattaya copper’s bank account, and I have to add my congratula-tions to the London Clock and his cronies who have done a great job with the layout and the décor. The bar stools are comfortable, the big screen TVs will be a drawcard for watching any and all sports, the food from the large kitchen I was told by those who sampled the buf-fet was first-class, and liver wasters come in ham-fist sized glasses…Al-though there will be ‘coyote’ danc-ers employed to shake and wriggle in the chrome-poled alcoves, the place is essentially a club house where everyone is welcome to come and shoot the breeze.’ That’s pretty much the way Secrets continues to operate.Piece of Pith: Q. What’s the dif-ference between a G-Spot and a golf ball? A. A guy will actually search for a golf ball.

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When United States President Woodrow Wilson declared war on Germany in April 1917, it was almost certain the American entry would turn the tide against the Central Powers (Germany, Austria-Hungary, the Ottoman Empire, and Bulgaria). Watching on the sidelines, King Vajiravudh (Rama VI) considered his options. Siam had remained neutral since the outbreak of war in August 1914, and his nation enjoyed friendly relations with Germany, but Vajiravudh recognised the political value of throwing in his lot with the Allied Powers (Britain, France, Italy, and Japan). He was convinced participation would be ‘…an excellent opportunity for us to gain equality with other nations.’ Siam had suffered from the imperial designs of the British and French, losing great swathes of territory in the 20 years or so prior to the outbreak of war in Europe. Additionally, Siam had been coerced into signing agreements

Political opportunism led Siam to pull the right rein in the

First World WarHistorical feature

By Duncan Stearn

accepting the imposition of extra-territorial rights for the citizens of nations such as France, Britain, and the United States, and Vajiravudh hoped Thai involvement in the war would lead to a revision of these unequal treaties. Therefore, on 22 July 1917, despite the misgivings of some members of the government, King Vajiravudh instructed Interior Minister Chao Phraya Surasi to declare war on Ger-many and Austria-Hungary. Among the reasons cited was a claim that the Central Powers were ‘ignoring the norms of warfare and fighting in an immoral way.’ One of Siam’s first acts was to intern, and later seize as war reparations, 12 ocean-going ships of the North German Line (NGL) as well as the Bangkok docks and warehouses of the firms Windsor Rose and Markwald.

ErrorThere was a certain irony in Siam allying itself with France, a nation that had bullied her way into annexing large chunks of Siamese territory over the previous 50 years. Such are the vagaries of geo-politics. Then again, Vajiravudh had been

the first Thai monarch educated abroad, being sent to Britain. He spoke fluent English, had been at Sandhurst Military College, and commissioned an officer in the Durham Light Infantry. The Anglo-phile monarch was contrasted by a number of royal relatives who had spent time being educated in Ger-many. A coup in March 1912 by 92 low-ranking royals, many pro-Ger-man, who hoped to replace Vajira-vudh, did not pre-dispose the ruler towards Germany or her allies. Not much happened until 21 September when the king gave the order for Chao Phraya Bodin, the Minister of War, to call for volun-teers to make up an expeditionary force to fight in Europe. A limit was placed on overall numbers and an expeditionary force totalling 1,284 men was raised, under the overall command of Major General Phraya Pijaijarnrit (later promoted to Lieutenant-General and known as Phraya Devahastin). Volunteers were divided into three units: motor transport, medical, and aviation. Thai records suggest the force left Siam on 19 June 1918 and landed at Marseilles on 30 July where the three sections were separated and sent for training in different parts of France. Yet a report sent to the American Consul in Melbourne, Australia on 4 June stated, ‘A con-tingent of Siamese troops has also joined the Allies.’ This is a strange discrepancy of almost two months between the Thai chronicles and a contemporary account. The motor transport section finally moved up to the Western Front in October 1918. For five days, from 26 October, the Thais supplied French forces in an area subjected to German artillery fire and later received the Croix de Guerre from the French government as a unit citation. About 95 air personnel, training at French Army Flying Schools, qualified as pilots, but had not com-pleted their courses when the war ended on 11 November. The motor

transport unit went into the occupied part of the Rhineland with French forces following the signing of the armistice. The aviation contingent returned first to Siam, arriving in Bangkok on 1 May 1919 while the remainder landed on Thai soil on 21 September. Each member of the expeditionary force was given a medal by King Vajiravudh.

MemorialA now almost-forgotten war memo-rial stands on the edge of Sanam Luang in Bangkok. Called the Volun-teer Soldiers’ Monument the names of the 19 soldiers claimed as casu-alties of the conflict are inscribed. None died in battle. The remains of the casualties were interred in the monument on 24 September 1919 but the memorial itself was not officially unveiled until 22 July 1921, a strange and unexplained delay. Of the 19, two men died in Bang-kok before the force left for Europe, presumably during training. Nine died in France and the other eight in Germany. Of these, 10 expired in hospitals or medical stations. It is highly probable some of these hospital casualties were due to the Spanish influenza epidemic that raged worldwide between 1918 and 1920. The remaining deaths appear to be the result of vehicular acci-dents. Siam participated at the Ver-sailles Peace Conference and signed the Treaty of Versailles. In January 1920, Siam became a founding member of the League of Nations. On 1 September 1920, King Va-jiravudh’s decision to go to war was vindicated when the United States ceded her extraterritorial rights. France relinquished her rights in February 1925 while Britain signed a treaty to the same effect in July the same year.

1917 First World War memorial, Sanam Luang, Bangkok

Siamese First World War Victory medal

League of nations delegation

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