Personal Statement Workshop
Wadham College, University of Oxford
Structure
• Things to know
• Getting started
• Being super-curricular
• Extra-curricular
Pe
rso
na
l S
tate
me
nt • Part of UCAS application
• 4,000 characters = 47 lines of text
• One document that goes to each university you apply to
• Evidence of your preparation for university-style education
• Deadline for Oxbridge and medicine-related subjects: 15th October (15 January everywhere else)
What are Tutors looking for?
Watch the followingvideo and record the
dos and don’ts.
What are the outcomes of going to university?
1. Critical thinking2. Discipline
knowledge3. Problem solving4. Teamwork5. Communication
6. Professional skills7. Ethics and values8. Creativity9. Learning to learn
Source: OECD 2013
What are universities looking for?
Universities look for skills and attributes tailored to the course you are applying to.
• What are the admissions criteria for the subject you are applying for?
• Your personal statement should demonstrate them
Admissions/Selection Criteria
Experimental Psychology
• Appreciate the scope of psychology• Can evaluate evidence• Are able to consider issues from different
perspectives• Have a capacity for logical and creative
thinking• Appreciate the importance of empirical
evidence in supporting arguments• Can cope with the quantitative demands
of the course.
80% Academic including
super -curricular
20% Extra-Curricular
Super-curricular• What have you read, watched, visited or listened
to that has excited you?• Why was it interesting?• How do these support and compliment the
course you are applying for?
Extra curricular• Try and focus on transferrable skills• Selection criteria for other four universities
Why do you want to study this course?• Current studies • Outside reading• What has inspired you?
Pe
rso
na
l S
tate
me
nt
Exa
mp
les
Look at the personal statement examples:
What do you notice?How do they demonstrate passion?How do they demonstrate university outcomes?
Underline/highlight examples from the personal statement you’re looking at
Ge
ttin
g S
tart
ed
Op
en
ing
Pa
rag
rap
h
Personal statement openings tend to follow a similar format:
- Why you are excited about your subject?- What you have done academically to show this?- Keep it simply. Keep it short.
• Look at the openings of the personal statement examples:
What do you notice?
Op
en
ing
Pa
rag
rap
h
Personal statement openings tend to follow a similar format:
- Why you are excited about your subject?- What you have done academically to show this?- Keep it simply. Keep it short.
(Tip 1: Leave it until last)(Tip 2: Draft 5 first sentences)
• Must be received by College in November• Arts/Humanities subjects• Think about your interests• A piece of marked work submitted as part of
A-Level• May be discussed at interview• www.ox.ac.uk/writwork
Opening Paragraph Examples
“Classical literature has preserved the history and society of the world that they have come from. Most notably, the connection between drama and society is what I find most intriguing. From Aristophanes' Lysistrata which seems to serve as a criticism of the ongoing Peloponnesian War, to Homer's Iliad, which portrays conventional ideas of masculinity and heroism.” Classics
“While visiting the Joint European Torus at the Culham Centre for Fusion Energy, I discovered how strong magnetic fields, radio waves and the injection of high speed neutral atoms can heat plasma to over 300 million degrees to achieve fusion, potentially providing a long term solution for the world's energy crisis. I learnt how mechanical engineering is central to managing the heat transfer; this was a key experience in my choice of course.” Engineering
• Must be received by College in November• Arts/Humanities subjects• Think about your interests• A piece of marked work submitted as part of
A-Level• May be discussed at interview• www.ox.ac.uk/writwork
Opening Paragraph Examples
“My first exposure to the concept of genetic disease was whilst doing work experience at a deaf school. I found it incredible that the assortment of four bases could have such a tangible effect on health and development. This sparked my curiosity in the theory of genetic mutation, and was my first introduction to Biochemistry.”
Biochemistry
“My admiration for French extends beyond its beautiful sounds to the richness of its history and culture. For my EPQ, I studied the Charter of Laïcité in French Schools and the history of secularism in France. In order to determine whether I believed it was coherent policy to ban religious symbols in schools, while subscribing to a motto of Liberté, Egalité, Fraternité.” French (and Arabic)
Why do you want to study the subject?
With the person next to you, decide who is person A and who is person B
Person A: explain to person B why you’d like to study the subject (or convince them to study it) in 1 min
Person B: is this explanation convincing? Swap!
“I got my first computer when I was X years old.”
The ten most frequently-used opening statements.
1.”I am currently studying a BTEC National Diploma in ...” 2. “From a young age I have always been interested in ... “3. “From an early age I have always been interested in ... “4. “Nursing is a very challenging and demanding career ... “5. “For as long as I can remember I have been fascinated with ...” 6. "Fashion is not something that exists in dresses only” ... “7. “Nursing is a profession I have always looked upon with ... “8. “For as long as I can remember I have been interested in ... “9. “I am an International Academy student and have been studying since ...”10. “Academically, I have always been a very determined and ... “
Top Tips
#1 Avoid Clichés
Don’t Copy
“Ever since I accidentally burnt holes in my pyjamas after experimenting with a chemistry set on my eighth birthday, I have always had a passion for science.”
Don’t Lie
Saying things you haven’t done.Saying you’ve read something you haven’t
Top Tips
#1 Avoid Clichés
#2 Don’t Copy
(or Lie)
“My interest in Biology began when my pet cat Snuggles died and I performed an autopsy.”
Top Tips #3 Don’t be
quirky#1 Avoid Clichés
#2 Don’t Copy
(or Lie)
"On the 20th of April a great figure in history was born...It was me, who will go on to make great changes in history as we know it"
80% Academic including
super -curricular
20% Extra-Curricular
Super-curricular• What have you read, watched, visited or listened
to that has excited you?• Why was it interesting?• How do these support and compliment the
course you are applying for?
Extra curricular• Try and focus on transferrable skills• Selection criteria for other four universities
Why do you want to study this course?• Current studies • Outside reading• What has inspired you?
Being Super-Curricular
How have you developed your knowledge?
What have you read, watched, visited or listened to that has inspired you?• Books, magazines, exhibitions, talks,
podcasts
Why was it interesting?How do these support and compliment the course you are applying for? skills / knowledge
Su
pe
r-C
urr
icu
lars
Go back to the personal statement examples:
What have they done to show super-curricular interest in their course?
What skills are they demonstrating through these activities?
Examples from current students
Super-curricular activities
Evi
de
nce
of
you
r in
tere
st
How many academic activities have you done since Year 10? Note them down.
Tell the person next to you about these activities.
What did you learn from these resources/activities?
Can they be grouped?
“To find out more about the complexity of the brain, I read
“So you want to be a brain surgeon” by Stephan Sanders.
This hasgiven me a great deal of insight
into neurosurgery.”
Admissions Tutor Comment: “While this illustrates that the candidate is reading
around the subject, some further significance [should]
be given.”
• What did you learn?
• What do you think?
• What questions do you have?
• What do you agree/disagree with?
Top Tips
#4Don’t List
“After reading John Donne's "The Flea", I was intrigued by his choice to represent love for a woman through the conceit of a parasite, eating away at himself. I saw this as an example of Donne's alleged misogyny furthering the stereotype of women as "cruel and sudden", in contrast to his predecessors who idealized and even worshipped them. However, I think it is equally interesting to consider the view expressed by Ilona Bell that Donne does not present the woman as singularly cruel, but as being capable of independent thought and challenging patriarchal authority, even if Donne himself viewed that in a negative light and considered it a perversion of gender roles.” English
Critical Thinking
…take your super-curricular activity and say what it made you
think or link it to things you are have done or are learning about.(critical thinking)
What looks really impressive is if you can...Or…say what it made
you think, and use it as a stepping stone to
other activities
(Using it as a stepping stone)
Can you see any examples in the personal statements you have?
“Reading the book prompted me to listen to a Radio 4 series, Darwin: In Our Time, about how Darwin reached his theory of evolution and how this was received by 19th century society. As well as reading seminal texts on Biology, I have taken the opportunity to attend lectures, at the Imperial College Festival and at a residential course at Trinity College Cambridge, amongst other events. I particularly enjoyed a lecture by science author Kat Arney on genetics. It highlighted how much we don't understand about the function of much of our DNA, and expanded on what I had previously read in 'The Animal Kingdom: A Very Short Introduction', by Peter Holland, about embryological development and how DNA can code for the construction of a complex body plan.”Biology
Stepping Stones
“After realising how much Archaeology and History can combine to allow you to understand the ancient world I read 'Archaeology: A Very Short Introduction'. As a new subject to me the methods and theories behind archaeology were less apparent. I was struck most by the idea of scientific and social theories affecting archaeologists' work. Theories I studied in A-level Sociology, such as Engels and Marx's idea of 'primitive communism' had such a profound effect on the discipline that Marxist Archaeology was founded. This showed me how connected 'social sciences' can be in determining how we think about the world and the past.”Classical Archaeology & Ancient History
Linking Knowledge
Example: Stepping Stone Scaffold
1. Select something that you have done.
2. What were you struck by? What questions did it raise?
3. What did you do to find our more find out more?
4. What struck you about this?
“I find human and cell biology interesting and this inspired me to read 'Genome' by Matt Ridley (1). It explained each chromosome and its relationship to a part of human history or a disease. The chapter on stress was especially interesting, but what really intrigued me was the section on cancer (2). This led to me reading 'The Emperor of All Maladies' by Siddhartha Mukherjee (3) which I enjoyed, as it included cases rather than just being a history of cancer. The book demonstrated how current treatments were developed and tested (4).”Medicine
Example: Stepping Stone Scaffold
1. Select something that you have done.
2. What were you struck by? What questions did it raise?
3. What did you do to find our more find out more?
4. What struck you about this?
“Reading A Very Short Introduction to Molecular Biology (1), I was struck by a segment on regulatory RNA molecules. I was particularly fascinated by the concept of RNA used in the regulation of gene expression (2). This led me to a Nature article about Riboswitches: RNA molecules that can bind to a ligand and change their physical conformation (3). This happens in the expression region of the riboswitch, and determines whether the RNA is transcribed or not... Taking biochemistry at degree level would allow me to learn more about cell function and control... (4)” Biochemistry
Example: Stepping Stone Scaffold
1. Select something that you have done.
2. What were you struck by? What questions did it raise?
3. What did you do to find our more find out more?
4. What struck you about this?
Try and draft a paragraph1. Reading/ Attending/ Listening/ Work Experience in/
Participating in 2. I was struck by/ I was particularly interested in/3. This led me to/ To further my understanding/ In response, I/
Fascinated, I/ Extending my knowledge, I
80% Academic including
super -curricular
20% Extra-Curricular
Super-curricular• What have you read, watched, visited or listened
to that has excited you?• Why was it interesting?• How do these support and compliment the
course you are applying for?
Extra curricular• Try and focus on transferrable skills• Selection criteria for other four universities
Why do you want to study this course?• Current studies • Outside reading• What has inspired you?
Link them to skills useful for university
“Balancing my work in school as a language and student council prefect, as well as working part-time, has greatly improved my organisational skills, as well as teaching me how to properly arrange my time.”Classics
“…represent my school in hockey and netball, for which teamwork and commitment are crucial.”Human Sciences
Or keep it short and simple
“To relax I play hockey and was captain of the team at school. I enjoy Music and Dance; achieving Grade 8 in Dance, Grade 7 in Piano and Singing, and competing at a national level in Dance.”Medicine
“Outside academia, I enjoy reading, playing hockey, and taking part in drama productions, both on and off stage.”Biochemistry
“I find that studying the lives of people in the past is fascinating, and I have recently become particularly fascinated by the way that history is effected by people’s perceptions and
biases. I also find it fascinating that…”
Top Editing Tips
#1 Avoid Using
the Same
Words
Top Editing Tips
#1 Avoid Using
the Same
Words
#2 Check
spelling and
grammar
“Biology is a facsinatingdiscipline what help’s us to understand our world and wear it might be going.”
Editing takes time. Make sure each sentence is doing work.
This February I attended a taster lecture at Oxford University focussing on the usefulness of lasers in visualising nature (1,2). I was intrigued to see the role that technology plays in being able to visualise things on a cellular level, particularly the role of fluorescence (3). The ability to use adaptations from other organisms (e.g. the GFP gene from Jellyfish) to see the inner workings of the cell, is incredibly powerful. Subsequently I accessed the Cell Library Online to explore other examples of fluorescent labelling of cell components, e.g. LipidTOX to visualise fat stores (5).
Attending a lecture at Oxford University on the usefulness of lasers I was intrigued by the role of technology in viewing nature at a cellular level, particularly fluorescence. The use of adaptations from other organisms (e.g. the GFP gene from Jellyfish) to see the inner workings of the cell, is incredibly powerful. Subsequently, I used the Cell Library Online to explore other examples of fluorescent labelling e.g. LipidTOX to visualise fat stores.
1. Personal statements should start with an attention-grabbing sentence, which catches the admissions tutors’ eye and makes them want to read on.
2. Giving specific details about activities you have done, and insights you have gained, is more important than listing more activities.
3. The personal statement is about showing your personality so it should focus on your hobbies and interests as opposed to your academic activities.
4. It is vital to outline a “lightbulb” moment – a one-off personal experience which gave you your reason for wanting to study your chosen subject.
5. Personal statements should include a paragraph where you take a specific topic you are interested in and analyse it in detail.
FALSE
FALSE
TRUE
TRUE
FALSE
TRUE OR FALSE
SUMMINGUP
Look at the admissions criteria for your courses
What are your stepping stones going to be?
Set yourself 3 targets for super-curricular activities, and give yourself a time frame
Start drafting!