Prayer Secretsof

S u c c e s s f u lCatholic Couples

ana east

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This is the question we asked seven amazing Catholic couples. Here, you get a privileged glimpse inside the real-life prayer habits of accomplished leaders in Catholic marriage: Vatican appointees and authors, radio and podcast hosts, theologians, counselors, creative entrepreneurs, retreat leaders, diocesan directors, and even YouTubers!

Often, we don’t pray together as a couple because we’re not sure how. No one ever showed us an example. We can’t pull back the curtains and peek into other couples’ homes to see what their prayer life looks like.

The couples in this book have done just that; they pulled back the curtain for you.

These happy, successful, faith-filled couples know from experience how indispensable praying together is for marriage. It helps them through the struggles and increases their joys. They know that praying with and for each other creates spiritual intimacy.

They want you to experience those same blessings in your marriage, too.

Transform Your Marriage Through Prayer7 Amazing Couples Show You How“How do you pray together as a couple?”

Keep reading to learn from them how you can transform your own marriage!

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Overall, our goal is to make God a tangible part of our marriage and family life. For us, drawing closer to God doesn’t mean leaving our lives to go and be with him, it means asking him to accompany us as we go about the journey he asked us to walk together.

Every morning, when the alarm goes off, the first thing we do is roll toward each other, hold hands and give each other, our relationship, and our day to God. We’ll ask God to help us be the husband and wife he wants us to be and to find ways to make each other’s days easier or more pleasant, and we lift up any prayer intentions for the day.

Of course, we say grace at meals. We add a moment to these meal-time prayers to thank God for any blessings or ask for help with any struggles we might be facing that day. Also, we often give each other blessings, laying hands on each other and praying for any special concerns.

We talk to God, out loud, throughout the day. We thank him and ask for his help as if he was an actual member of the household who wants the best for us and is there to love and lead and guide us throughout our day.”

Dr. Greg and Lisa Popcak

Dr. Greg is a nationally recognized expert in pastoral councilling. He and Lisa Popcak are the founders of the Pastoral Solutions Institute which is dedicated to helping committed Catholics live abundant lives.

They are co-hosts of More-2Life Radio, airing each weekday on EWTN and SiriusXM.

Together, they have written nearly 20 books integrating solid Catholic theology with psychology including “Praying for (and with) your Spouse” “Parenting with Grace” and “For Better... Forever.”

Learn more about the Pastoral Solutions Institute at: www.catholiccounselors.com

Make God a tangible part of your marriage!

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We’ve discovered over time that our current season of raising young children means being very intentional and keeping each other accountable with prayer

as a couple, and we are always trying to grow in this area of our marriage!

We frequently pray the rosary in the car during long drives—a habit that began when we were dating—and independently read the daily Mass readings and discuss our insights together.

During difficult days at home or work we text each other asking for prayers and we will offer things up for one another. During disagreements we try, at some point, to pause, hold hands, and pray aloud in thanksgiving for each other and asking for clarity and understanding.”

Stephanie and Andrew Calis

Stephanie is a writer and the co-founder of Spoken Bride, a ministry for engaged and newlywed Catholic women. They met in a college English class and were married in 2011. They live near Baltimore, Maryland with their four children.

Find out more about Spoken Bride at www.spokenbride.com

Pray while driving in the car!

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We pray together every day, no matter what. Our typical prayer time together is impromptu prayer right before bed, where we thank God for all of our

blessings and lift up intentions. We’ve slowly added other prayer times—a rosary a couple times a week, praying with Scripture at least once a week, and the occasional novena.

While we’ve always prayed as a couple in our 10 years of marriage, it’s been in recent years that we’ve realized just how many graces have come from praying together. Our couple prayer time has also encouraged growth in our individual and family prayer!

If there is one thing we would recommend couples do together, it would be this: pray together every day. It doesn’t need to be complicated. Just do it, without making excuses. Your marriage will be blessed abundantly for it!”

Jen and Logan Lirette

Jen and Logan, high-school sweethearts, were married in 2009. They have been surprised by the ups, downs, twists and turns of marriage and share their insight and encouragement through their ministry, Surprised by Marriage.

Jen and Logan live in Louisiana with their 3 boys and their spoiled Beagle.

Follow Jen and Logan on YouTube, social media, and www.surprisedbymarriage.com

It doesn’t need to be complicated!

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Our prayer together has changed a ton over the years. Ten years ago when we had teenagers living at home, it looked very different. Twenty years ago when

we had little kids bopping around the house, it looked very different. Thirty years ago as a newly married couple, it looked different still. How we pray together now is as empty nesters.

We pray Morning Prayer and Evening Prayer together and take a rosary walk together every day. Since the abuse scandal broke out, Clare felt called to pray a Chaplet of Divine Mercy daily for priests. Because Claire suffers from an autoimmune disease affecting her hands, John prays for her healing and annoints her hands with Lourdes water or blessed water.

The two most important places for us and our family are two tables: the table of the Eurcharist and the dinner table! Both are non-negotiable for us.”

Dr. John and Claire Grabowski

John has taught moral theology at The Catholic University of America for the last 27 years. They were appointed as a member couple on the Pontifical Council for the Family in 2009 by Pope Benedict XVI. They have published several books together, including “Raising Catholic Kids for their Vocations.”

Married for 33 years, John and Claire have 5 children and 3 grandchildren. They have done marriage and pre-marriage ministry together for over 25 years.

Your prayer together can change over time!

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We start and end the day praying together. Lately, we’ve been praying through the Psalms. We also ask each other for prayer throughout the day. Usually,

with a text that says something like, ‘Hey—I’m feeling overwhelmed, will you send one up for me?’ or ‘I am giving a talk this morning, would you pray for me?’ Although those prayers are not necessarily said together, we’re always asking one another for intercession.

Recently, we did a two-day ‘Intentional Intermission.’ We found coverage for the kids and stayed home all weekend to talk through some important questions. It was a time to check-in with each other and dream together. A time to talk about challenges and celebrate what’s going well. A time to pray, worship, and go to Mass. In the daily craziness of a young family with four children, it is so rare to get a chance to pause and refocus, to see if the direction you’re headed is where you want to go.”

Jason and Sarah Kidd

Jason is the Marriage and Family Life Director for the Archdiocese of Portland in Oregon. He is the 2019-2021 president of the National Association of Catholic Family Life Ministers (NACFLM).

Jason and Sarah have four children, including one with special needs.

Ask each other for prayers by text!

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It can be challenging to pray together with kids and schedules, but we always pray nightly for at least a few minutes together. Sometimes if it’s the end of a

long day and we’re both falling asleep, we just say a Hail Mary together and offer a couple intentions.

We support each other in our spiritual lives by giving time for each other’s yearly retreats and honoring each other’s leisure, exercise and rest. We also buy spiritual books for one another other. Kristin really loves the Magnificat, so I took out a subscription for her as a suprise birthday gift.

We also take turns going to weekly Adoration, so one of us will go one week and the other goes the next week. These are little ways that we deeply honor and support each other’s spiritual journey, and make specific times for that.”

Dr. Mario and Kristin Sacasa

Dr. Mario Sacasa is a marriage counselor, theologian, and retreat director. He hosts the “Always Hope” podcast with the Faith and Marriage apostolate of the Willwoods Community. He and his wife Kristin have been married 17 years and have four boys.

Find out more about the Always Hope podcast at: www.faithandmarriage.org/alwayshope

Honor each other’s spiritual journey!

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We’ve been married 17 years. Generally, in recent years much of our prayer time has revolved around family and individual prayer. Before we were blessed

with kids, it was easier for us to keep a daily rhythm of couple prayer at bedtime. This has been a challenge over the last several years with different schedules at bedtime, etc.

We see couple prayer as the last thing the devil wants us to do—there is a spiritual battle at work. So, we are striving to take five minutes out of the day before bedtime for prayer together, recalling our spousal consecration in the Lord, praying for particular intentions and for each other, and surrendering our marriage to the Lord.”

Andrew and Kristin Lichtenwalner

Andrew served as the United States Conference of Catholic Bishops Executive Director of the Secretariat of Laity, Marriage, Family Life, and Youth. He currently serves as Director of Formation and Discipleship for the Catholic Archdiocese of Atlanta.

Andrew and Kristen have been married for 17 years and are blessed with three beautiful children.

Couple prayer is spiritual battle!

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When will you pray together? Think about your routines and be specific. If mornings will work best, will it be before you get out of bed? After you’re dressed? At breakfast? If at night, will it be before you get into bed? When you are lying together in bed before you go to sleep?

The important thing is to try something. If it doesn’t work, try something else! Write down what you will try first:

Couple Prayer GuideMake praying together a reality in your marriage

1. Choose a time to pray 2. Choose how you will prayThere are so many ways to pray in our Catholic tradition, but if you are just getting started with praying as a couple, keep it simple!

Be sure to include some spontaneous prayers of thanksgiving and petition. (See a simple prayer you can use below.) This keeps your daily prayer relevant and new each day. Voicing your gratitude and struggles in prayer with your spouse also deepens the bond and intimacy that you share.

When we will pray: How we will pray:

God, thank you for the gift of my spouse and the gift of our marriage. Also, thank you for [whatever you are thankful for today].

God, help me to be loving and kind to my spouse and to serve our marriage with your grace. I also ask for [name your petitions].

Here is a simple, powerful and practical prayer. Use it by itself or add it after other prayers, such as at the end of a rosary. It’s great because it focuses on your marriage and asks for specific graces to make it joyful and loving.

Simple Couple Prayer