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Your have been asked to return to a draft, to revise AND edit it.
It behooves us, then, to think about what “deep revision” means, as well as
to reconsider what it means to (critically) respond.
The most common reasons I hear for not revising?
#1: The Myth of Divine Inspiration
#2: Confusion of Editing with Revision (or “correctness” with purpose?)
The guilty undertaker sighs,The lonesome organ grinder cries,The silver saxophones say I should refuse you.The cracked bells and washed-out hornsBlow into my face with scorn,But it's not that way,I wasn't born to lose you.I want you, I want you,I want you so bad,Honey, I want you.
The drunken politician leapsUpon the street where mothers weepAnd the saviors who are fast asleep,They wait for you.And I wait for them to interruptMe drinkin' from my broken cupAnd ask me toOpen up the gate for you.I want you, I want you,I want you so bad,Honey, I want you.
Now all my fathers, they've gone downTrue love they've been without it.
But all their daughters put me down'Cause I don't think about it.Well, I return to the Queen of SpadesAnd talk with my chambermaid.She knows that I'm not afraidTo look at her.She is good to meAnd there's nothing she doesn't see.She knows where I'd like to beBut it doesn't matter.I want you, I want you,I want you so bad,Honey, I want you.
Now your dancing child with his Chinese suit,He spoke to me, I took his flute.No, I wasn't very cute to him,Was I?But I did it, though, because he liedBecause he took you for a rideAnd because time was on his sideAnd because I . . .I want you, I want you,I want you so bad,Honey, I want you.
“I Want You”:
Why revise a hit?Blonde on Blonde (Track 5)
June, 1966
At Budokan (Disc 2, Track 6)1979
This process could be:•a chance to re-think the rhetorical situation and make changes to your message that will increase its effectiveness.•a chance to truly re-envision
Let’s re-think re-vision.
The Rhetorical Situation
Re-envision(ing):Evolution of a BettyHow has Betty Crocker been depicted differently across time?
Why were these changes made?
Re-envision(ing):Updating Designs
(New Bug)
(Old Bug)
Re-envision(ing):Old Mug, New Mug: Updating Brands.
FMI, see: http://delicious.com/aisling/auntjemima
The Back story “Aunt Jemima was
dreamed up in 1889 by a white businessman who was inspired by a character at a minstrel show. Looking for a way to sell a self-rising pancake mix, Chris L. Rutt conceived a jolly ex-slave who lived on a Louisiana plantation and made legendary flapjacks in the days ‘befo' de wah.’” (from “Uncle Ben, CEO”, David Seagal, Slate.com)
…and, lest you think this an isolated revision:
Uncle Ben, then and now:
“Response” can take many forms, and may have purposes of its own.
“No More” Jon Onye Lockard
(1967)
RateMyProfessors.com
Let’s rethink response.Each of these texts is a response to (and attempt to reshape) another text.
MTV University:“Professors Strike Back”
