I used to download music illegally...

Downloading music illegally may seem like the right thing to do in the heat of the moment, but it has been clinically proven to cause any or all of the following side effects and symptoms: Slowing of computer functions, irregular computer activity such as freezing, crashing, pop-up ads, addition of unknown programs to computer server. In some cases users have become social outcasts. You or your computer might experience blackouts, applications not working correctly, jail time and daily verbal abuse from cellmate, inaccessible disks or disk drives, casting dark shadows on your family’s name, unusual error messages, transferring your shameful viruses to friends and loved ones, criminal charges, being sued for tens of thousands of dollars, being suspended or expelled from school for criminal

behavior, and entering the job world without a degree. You might be denied a job due to your unlawful behavior and be referred to in public by one or more of the following names: “thief,” “criminal,” “cheap-ass,” or “greedy shitbag.” You will most likely also experience loss of moral character, shunning by friends and family, homelessness, inability to get a loan, inability to meet a girl/boy friend or husband/wife, loss of self respect, poor credit, and being hated by the musicians you love. You may or may not be partly responsible for the loss of 70,000 American jobs per year and even more harm to a dwindling economy. And in many cases, the song you think you’re downloading will in fact be the audio track to an 80s-era pornography or 3-5 minutes of high-pitched screeching noises

which will mostly likely contain a smorgasbord of deadly computer viruses. But, there is a cure. For just one dollar a song, you can lawfully download music, and end the torrent of computer infections, moral scrutiny, and job loss. You too can find peace.

This message brought to you by the Coalition for Downloading Music Legally.

Visit CMDL.com to find your peace.

but I found the cure.

Downloading music illegally may seem like the right thing to do in the heat of the moment, but it has been clinically proven to cause any or all of the following side effects and symptoms: Slowing of computer functions, irregular computer activity such as freezing, crashing, pop-up ads, addition of unknown programs to computer server. In some cases users have become social outcasts. You or your computer might experience blackouts, applications not working correctly, jail time and daily verbal abuse from cellmate, inaccessible disks or disk drives, casting dark shadows on your family’s name, unusual error messages, transferring your shameful viruses to friends and loved ones, criminal charges, being sued for tens of thousands of dollars, being suspended or expelled from school

for criminal behavior, and entering the job world without a degree. You might be denied a job due to your unlawful behavior and be referred to in public by one or more of the following names: “thief,” “criminal,” “cheap-ass,” or “greedy shitbag.” You will most likely also experience loss of moral character, shunning by friends and family, homelessness, inability to get a loan, inability to meet a girl/boy friend or husband/wife, loss of self respect, poor credit, and being hated by the musicians you love. You may or may not be partly responsible for the loss of 70,000 American jobs per year and even more harm to a dwindling economy. And in many cases, the song you think you’re downloading will in fact be the audio track to an 80s-era pornography or 3-5 minutes of high-

pitched screeching noises which will mostly likely contain a smorgasbord of deadly computer viruses. But, there is a cure. For just one dollar a song, you can lawfully download music, and end the torrent of computer infections, moral scrutiny, and job loss. You too can find peace.

This message brought to you by the Coalition for Downloading Music Legally.

Visit CDML.com to find your peace.

but I found the cure.

Bald heads ruin special moments.

“Make Light of Baldness” Facebook App

TM

See the glaring differenceat x5hairlaser.comBald heads ruin special moments.

TM

Users can call out their balding friends and loved ones by adding an exaggerated lens glare on their shiny head. The photo can then be uploaded to facebook and tagged, “making light” of baldness and directing viewers to the x5 Hair Laser website.

Original photo Head glare added

Everyone starts out goofy.

Meet me at the mountain.

Lift's closed.

Meet me at the mountain.

Excellent.

Meet me at the mountain.

If you do a backf lip,but no one’s there to see it, did you REALLY LAND it?

Rob Hirst-Hermansportfolio: www.robhirst-hermans.com

rob@robhirst-hermans.com@RawbHH

4848021804

+ experience

+ schoolingS.I. NEWHOUSE SCHOOL OF PUBLIC COMMUNICATIONSSYRACUSE UNIVERSITY major: creative advertising / minor: marketing / 3.7 GPA

FREELANCE MUSIC MANAGEMENT/PROMOTIONS philadelphia, PA / May 2009 - present management/promotions/web presence for up-and-coming music artists

SOCIAL MEDIA DIRECTOR / HEART GALLERY of PHILADELPHIA philadelphia, PA / May 2009 - present created and now manage a social media operation for the Philadelphia nonprofit

HEAD OF BRANDING / DORMSET.com syracuse, NY / September 2009 - present responsible for the management of brand image for internet startup, including name, tagline, graphics and promotions COPYWRITING INTERN / RED TETTEMER philadelphia, PA / Summer 2009 wrote copy under the supervision of two creative directors clients: SEPTA / PA Tourism / Sprout TV / University of Maryland DIGITAL ADVERTISING INTERN / SUBSTANCE MEDIA london, UK / January 2009 - May 2009 participated in daily brainstorm sessions and wrote copy for online/mobile features and applications for the feature film industry

+ woop-dee-dooNEWHOUSE DEAN’S LIST 7 out of 7 semesters

WINNER: JP Morgan Chase Branding Competition / Fall 2008 rebranding and campaign launch for JP Morgan/SU educational partnership presented to JP Morgan Chase board of directors in NYC

FOUNDING MEMBER: Psi Psi Chapter, Sigma Chi Fraternity syracuse, NY / Spring 2008

objective: seeking entry level position in copywriting