+ All Categories
Home > Documents > Scientific Paper Guide

Scientific Paper Guide

Date post: 18-Nov-2014
Category:
Upload: envirocomp
View: 128 times
Download: 5 times
Share this document with a friend
Popular Tags:
113
Table of Contents PREFACE -- How to Use this Handbook CHAPTER ONE -- PURPOSE Introduction 1.1. What is Plain English? 1.2. What is a research paper? 1.3. Why are you writing? 1.4. Who are your readers? 1.5. What should you include? 1.6. What should you leave out? CHAPTER TWO -- TITLES, ABSTRACTS, KEY WORD LISTS AND INTRODUCTIONS Overview 2.1. Titles 2.2. Abstracts/Summaries 2.3. Key Word Lists 2.4. Introductions 2.4.a. Introductory Statements: Introductions to Papers 2.4.b. Introductory Statements: Introductions to sections and paragraphs 2.5. Introductions: Organization and Overview 2.6. Introductions: Citations and References 2.7. Introductions: Background versus History CHAPTER THREE -- MAIN BODY: GENERAL WRITING GUIDELINES Overview 3.1. Cohesion 3.1.a. Using Articles 3.1.a.i. When not to use articles: General statements and "mass" nouns 3.1.a.ii. Inserting articles where they have been omitted 3.1.a.iii. Wrong article choices 3.1.b. Dense Text 3.1.b.i. Problems with the Merging of Mathematical Expressions and English 3.1.b.ii. Controlling overly long statements 3.1.c. Use the Active Voice in Favor of the Passive 3.1.d. Transitions 3.1.e. Consistency 3.1.e.i. Tense 3.1.e. ii. Number 3.1.e.iii. Parallel structures 3.1.e.iv. Abbreviations 3.1.f. Capitalization and Punctuation 3.1.g. Argument Support: Facts and opinions 3.2. Economy 3.2.a. Repetition 3.2.b. Wordiness 3.2.c. Redundancy 3.2.d. Conjunctions 3.3. Directness 3.3.a. Visualize your Message
Transcript

Table of Contents

PREFACE -- How to Use this Handbook

CHAPTER ONE -- PURPOSE Introduction1.1. What is Plain English? 1.2. What is a research paper?1.3. Why are you writing?1.4. Who are your readers?1.5. What should you include?1.6. What should you leave out?

CHAPTER TWO -- TITLES, ABSTRACTS, KEY WORD LISTS AND INTRODUCTIONS Overview2.1. Titles2.2. Abstracts/Summaries2.3. Key Word Lists2.4. Introductions 2.4.a. Introductory Statements: Introductions to Papers 2.4.b. Introductory Statements: Introductions to sections and paragraphs2.5. Introductions: Organization and Overview2.6. Introductions: Citations and References2.7. Introductions: Background versus History

CHAPTER THREE -- MAIN BODY: GENERAL WRITING GUIDELINES Overview3.1. Cohesion 3.1.a. Using Articles 3.1.a.i. When not to use articles: General statements and "mass" nouns 3.1.a.ii. Inserting articles where they have been omitted 3.1.a.iii. Wrong article choices 3.1.b. Dense Text 3.1.b.i. Problems with the Merging of Mathematical Expressions and English 3.1.b.ii. Controlling overly long statements 3.1.c. Use the Active Voice in Favor of the Passive 3.1.d. Transitions 3.1.e. Consistency 3.1.e.i. Tense 3.1.e. ii. Number 3.1.e.iii. Parallel structures 3.1.e.iv. Abbreviations 3.1.f. Capitalization and Punctuation 3.1.g. Argument Support: Facts and opinions3.2. Economy 3.2.a. Repetition 3.2.b. Wordiness 3.2.c. Redundancy 3.2.d. Conjunctions3.3. Directness 3.3.a. Visualize your Message

3.3.b. Concrete 3.3.c Pronouns 3.3.d. Word category change 3.3.e. Avoid (multiple) negatives 3.3.f. Avoid Lexical Ambiguity: Wrong word choice 3.3.g. Avoid Lexical Ambiguity: Avoid vague terms 3.3.h. Word Usage: "much" 3.3.i. Avoid Syntactic Ambiguity: Scope, word order, adjectives and adverbs3.4. Appropriateness 3.4.a. Appropriateness: Avoid conversational forms 3.4.b. Appropriateness: Adopt neutral, semi-formal, semi-polite style

CHAPTER FOUR -- CONCLUSIONS Overview4. Summaries and Conclusions

CHAPTER FIVE -- REVISION/SUBMISSION Overview5.1. Self-edit5.2. Colleague check5.3. Revise/rewrite5.4. Native check5.5. Submit5.6. Final Thoughts

Appendix Appendix A - 80 Rules of Plain EnglishAppendix B - Suggested Reading ListAppendix C - Reference Guide

PREFACE

How to use this handbook

This handbook is a guide that covers many of the problem areas that writers face whenwriting technical and scientific research papers in English. We employ a method of writing, calledPlain English, to correct the problems that are highlighted here. The system of Plain English isexplained thoroughly in the first chapter, but here, we should note that it is made up of severalprinciples, guidelines and rules for writing English clearly, correctly and concisely. This system hasbeen applied elsewhere to business and workplace writing applications, as well as for manyprofessional situations for spoken applications.

Not all Plain English guidelines and rules are equally important in all fields. So, in thishandbook designed for writers of technical and scientific English, we will not cover each and everyprinciple, guideline and rule that has been developed for the system of Plain English, but rather, willfocus only on those areas that are particularly relevant in the writing of a basic research report. Ishould also point out that in Appendix A, there is a list of all principles, guidelines and rules ofPlain English, though, again, not all are referred to in this handbook. Each of these is described inmuch more detail in other publications.

We will look at many typical writing errors found in research reports from differentviewpoints. We will see, for example, how some errors can be considered as problems of wordiness,and later, the same errors seen as problems of poor word choice, and still later, as problems of poorword order. We will see some problems that appear to be purely errors in grammar, and again thesame problems as problems of style. It is important to understand that it is not necessary to attributeone problem to one specific cause, or to try to separate style from grammar; in Plain English, weassume a basis of grammaticality, but understand that differing conventions of style, and usage, canoften confuse the issue. You need not, therefore, try to identify and categorize each and every erroras something unique and special; likely, it is not. In fact, we will see that most problems are a resultof several factors, so it is important, therefore, to consider a multitude of factors in order to be fullyprepared to repair the problems.

This text is not intended for the strict grammarian, nor does it require that the reader knowmuch about the prescriptive grammatical rules of English. Rather, we attempt to show you how touse and develop the knowledge and skills that you possess now, so that in the future you are able towrite more successfully. We hope to do this by showing how a set of Plain English principles can beemployed to improve the readability of your reports.

Since we will look at problem areas from many different viewpoints, it is probably best toread the entire text through, once, before attempting to use it as simply a reference guide. In somecases, important points are only made once, and will be overlooked if the reader skips from onetopic to another. Also, one of the main ideas behind the system of Plain English is that allprinciples, guidelines and rules are interconnected, and together, they operate as system of languageexpression and usage, but will not be nearly as effective if each of the many different points areviewed in isolation of the others.

Once you are familiar with the book, and the principles of Plain English, then thehandbook can be used as a handy reference guide for problems (and solutions) that require specialattention for your particular needs. Further, in the second appendix, Appendix B, I have provided alist of supplementary resources which may be of some use to you if you wish to do further readingand preparation on the subject of writing in Plain English. Finally, in the third appendix, AppendixC, please find a “reference guide” which summarizes the basic steps for writing a research paper,followed by a brief discussion of each of the steps mentioned in the guide. This guide provides auseful overview for the three stages of developing a research paper; including preparation, writingand revision. Good luck with your writing, and I hope that you find some ideas in the handbook that

will help you to write more effectively in English.

CHAPTER ONEPURPOSE

Contents

***

• Introduction • 1.1. What is Plain English? • 1.2. What is a research paper? • 1.3. Why are you writing? • 1.4. Who are your readers? • 1.5. What should you include? • 1.6. What should you leave out?

Introduction

In this hand book, I will introduce how writers can apply the system of Plain English to thetask of writing a typical technical or scientific research article. In order to do this, we need to firstconsider what the system of Plain English is, and also, what the basic structure of a research articleis.

1.1. What is Plain English?

Plain English is a complete system of English usage that embodies four rigorous principles,which further address sixteen basic guidelines, which in turn govern eighty separate rules of usage(see Appendix A for the complete list). Due to the introductory nature of this handbook, however,we will primarily focus on the four basic principles. These four basic principles of Plain English aredescribed in (1).

(1) The Principles of Plain English

a. Cohesiveness (unified, logical, consistent, complete, etc.)b. Directness (clear, succinct, positive, etc.)c. Economy (brief, uncluttered, minimal, etc.)d. Appropriateness (polite, respectful, correct, neutral, etc.)

The Principle of Cohesiveness is composed of four basic guidelines. These guidelines are: (a)Conform to context (identify a target audience and write to it); (b) Be consistent (avoid shifts intense, voice, subject, etc.); (c) Use a logical order (organize material logically, link ideas clearly,unify the text, etc.), and; (d) Avoid distractions (avoid overly simple sentences, repetition ofwords, and dense sentence structure). In essence, the Principle of Cohesiveness helps us to tie ourideas together into well-formed units. So, words are combined into well-formed phrases, phrasesinto well-formed sentences, sentences into well-formed paragraphs, and well-formed paragraphsinto well-organized discussions. The Principle of Cohesiveness unifies our thoughts around acentral idea, or structure, and helps us to move from one point to another in a clear and

understandable fashion. It organizes our words along standard forms of writing, and helps theaudience move smoothly through the various points of our discussion.

The next principle is the Principle of Directness. This principle helps us to direct theaudience to the pertinent information, with as little deviation as possible. There are four basicguidelines supporting the Principle of Directness: (a) State what things are, not what they seem to be(use concrete terms, avoid syntactic and lexical ambiguity, separate fact from opinion, etc.); (b)State the subject clearly (avoid ambiguity, focus on the message, avoid indirect references, etc.); (c) State the "bottom line" succinctly (avoid developing ideas that you will dismiss later), and; (d) Avoid multiple negatives (avoid negatives expressions as well as spite and sarcasm).

The Principle of Economy contains basic four guidelines. These include: (a) Brief is best(avoid wordiness, restatement and redundancy); (b) High frequency words are preferred over lowfrequency "specialty" words (use common words, avoid coining new terms, define or glossuncommon expressions); (c) Avoid subordination (avoid reported speech and avoid subordinateconjunctions), and; (d) Discuss one point per statement (avoid run-on sentences, develop yourdiscussion one step at a time, and avoid unrelated ideas in the same sentence). In essence, thePrinciple of Economy can be summarized as "brief is best." This principle helps to trim a text ofunnecessary words, sentences and ideas, so that the point of focus is placed clearly on the keyelements of the message. Many of the rules governed by the Principle of Economy are also closelyrelated to the Principle of Directness, since wordiness tends to obscure meaning and focus.

The Principle of Appropriateness consists of four supporting guidelines: (a) Be truthful andshow politeness and respect for others (use appropriate gender references, use neutral words, avoidgeneralizations and stereotyping, etc.); (b) Avoid idioms and slang, especially the more obscureregional variations (avoid clichés and slang); (c) Avoid contractions and casual speech rules (avoiduncommon contractions), and; (d) Use grammatically correct sentences (keep tense and number inagreement, choose the right prepositions and avoid dangling modifiers). This principle basicallyguides proper usage of the English language. It gives guidelines for avoiding offensive and counter-productive writing styles, and helps to ensure an accurate use of the basic rules of English. Thisprinciple can screen out language that is unsuitable for written text, although it may be perfectly finewhen spoken.

What is important to understand in this system of Plain English is that the principles provide usage guidelines that, if followed, will help to ensure that texts are written clearly, concisely andcorrectly. The essential goal is to promote a one-to-one relationship between the author’s intendedmessage, and the reader’s perceived message. In order for this to happen, though, we have torecognize that not all grammatically correct sentences in English are necessarily clear, or concise. In fact, there are many “grammatical” sentences that are very difficult to understand because ofvague or ambiguous words or syntax, overly long and dense sentence structures, confusing pronounand article usage, and so forth. While there is neither the time nor the space to summarize all of thekey elements in the system of Plain English in this handbook, we will highlight some of the moreimportant principles, guidelines and rules as they specifically apply to research papers.

Before moving on to the next point, a word should be mentioned about the principles, andthe approach taken to writing errors in the main sections of this book. It is important to understandthat each of the principles works in consort with the others, and that it is rare when only oneprinciple comes into play with regard to a particular writing error. Rather, as we will see inChapters Two, Three and Four, the guidelines tend to overlap with one another, allowing us to viewwriting errors from multiple viewpoints. So, for example, we will see where a problem with theoveruse of the passive voice (a violation of the Principle of Cohesion which makes the text difficultfor the reader to easily comprehend), also likely involves wordiness (a violation of the Principle ofEconomy), since usually more words are required to convey a message in the passive voice than theactive, and also may involve a violation of the Principle of Directness as a result of using animprecise or vague term. As such, then, we will see some errors from alternate viewpoints

throughout this text. It is important to recognize, therefore, that while each Plain English principle,guideline and rule has its own specific function, it is likely that other principles, guidelines and rulesalso play important roles in guiding us towards producing better results when dealing with any onetarget problem area.

1.2. What is a research paper?

Essentially, a research paper is a report on research that has been conducted on a scientificor technical problem. The research is initiated by the asking of a question -- a research question --that is then followed by an investigation which usually involves one of two approaches; (1) theanalysis of actual experiments, which further requires discussion of materials, methodologies,results, analysis, and so forth (often referred to as primary research), or (2) a survey of availableinformation, or literature review, which in most cases simply means a careful study of existingresearch (secondary research).

(2) The Two Basic Types of Research Papers

a. A Report on an Actual Experiment, or Original Investigation (Primary Research)b. A Literature Review (Secondary Research)

While both types of papers share many things in common, and are quite similar structurally (thoughthe literature review naturally does not have sections on an actual experiment), our main focus willbe on the structure of the research paper which addresses an actual experiment (or investigation). Inother words, we will concentrate mainly on developing papers that report on original investigations(reports on primary research).

Virtually all research papers follow fairly rigid formats. Sometimes these formats aredetermined by the governing scientific or technical organization within which the writer isoperating. Similarly, journals themselves provide guidelines for the overall structure of the reportsthat they publish. For these reasons, it is neither possible nor necessary to attempt to suggest hereexactly how to format an article for a professional journal, since there are slight variations from onefield to the next, but at the same time, we can consider some of the more common aspects of theresearch paper’s format, below, and see how the Principles of Plain English effect them. In general,most reports contain the following components, listed in (3).

(3) The Basic Components of a Research Report

• a. Title • b. Abstract/Summary • c. Key Word List • d. Introduction • e. Main Body:

• e1. Background/Theory • e2. Experiment: Materials and Methods • e3. Experiment: Results • e4. Experiment: Discussion

• f. Conclusion • g. Acknowledgments • h. Author Biography • i. Appendices and/or Footnotes • j. References

For research papers that are primarily literature reviews, the sections on the experiment would bereplaced by one or more sections which introduce and critique already existing research. Otherwise,these papers would follow the same basic formula as described above. In the ensuing chapters ofthis handbook, we will discuss the main text portions of the paper (sections a-f), in terms of PlainEnglish.

1.3. Why are you writing?

First, we need to understand that technical and scientific writing is quite different fromliterary writing, where scientific (and technical) writing is usually employed in a very direct, matter-of-fact style, while literary writing, on the other hand, can range widely from the very abstract andobscure, to the more literal and concrete. The main purposes of scientific and technical writing canbe perhaps divided into four main groups: (a) to record, (b) to inform, (c) to educate, and (d) toparticipate. Let us briefly consider each of these below.

Reports that record are often reports on experiments that have produced results that add tothe knowledge of the scientific community, and provide a basis for others to conduct furtherresearch. It is similar to using building blocks to establish a foundation. Once a block is set down,other blocks can be set on it, and so forth, so that each earlier work contributes to the ever-growingfoundation of the field. Recording information is archival in nature, and documents the evolution ofa field of research.

Reports that inform can be thought of as progress reports, and are often concerningportions of a larger body of research. They tell others what the current issues are, what the currenttrends are, and what the current problems are. Often, major conclusions have not yet been obtained,and are simply suggestive of directions that the researchers will take, and others might consider.

Reports that educate, tell us of research that we were unaware of, of solutions that we hadnot heard of before, and often, of both problems and solutions that we were unfamiliar with. Often,these reports attempt to persuade, or convince, others of problems that should be addressed, ofsolutions that should be adopted, and methods that should be followed. Still other directions inregard to the field might be to question, to criticize, to lead and to direct. In these ways, suchreports are often pro-active and argumentative.

Finally, a very common purpose for many reports is just to indicate participation in thefield. These are often for local publications, such as by professors for their own university journals,and frequently represent simply demonstrations of competence in a certain field. Such reports mayof course attempt to ask and answer important scientific questions, but may be inherently limited byopportunity, funds, and other mitigating circumstances.

Rarely is any one report limited in purpose to just one of the four types mentioned above. Rather, most reports are in fact multi-purpose, where two or more of these purposes are addressed inthe same paper. For writers, the important point here is the need to consider the topic well enoughto be able to determine why, exactly, you are writing the paper, since this will obviously have someimpact on how you write, and what you write. Too often, I see researchers approach the writingprocess blind, and as a result, may have produced an unsuccessful (unread) report. Deciding whyyou are writing is just one of many points to consider in order to write a successful report.

1.4. Who are your readers?

Related to the last question, why are you writing, here, we consider who your audience is. First, you must determine the target readers' degree of familiarity with your subject. Usually, your

readers will represent a range of degrees of expertise, where some readers may be very familiar withyour subject, and others, not very familiar at all. It is best to target those readers less familiar withyour subject, rather than more, so that you would use as a starting point information that almostanyone would know in your field, and work from that point one step at a time, to the special area ofyour focus. This is in effect working from the known, to the unknown, or from the familiar to theunfamiliar. This movement, from known to unknown, can be quite brief, but if omitted, will losemany potential readers. Also, even for those readers familiar with your specific topic, most willenjoy a brief review simply to refresh their memories, especially if the topic area is quite specific,unique or obscure.

Another question related to your target audience is the language issue. Since your report isbeing written in English, it assumes an audience both inside, and outside, Japan. Likely, there willbe a large number of researchers in Japan reading your report. For this reason, your English must beclear, precise, and relatively easy to understand. As we all know, technical and scientific writing isdifficult to understand in one's own native language, and even more difficult to understand in asecond, or foreign language. Also, it is likely that your report will be read by other people aroundthe world, some using English as a first language, but likely, many using English as their second orforeign language. It is therefore doubly important to make sure that the reports are written clearly,concisely, correctly and concretely.

Before you write, and while you write, then, visualize your audience. How wide is thefield that you wish to address? Are you communicating with engineers, chemists, physicists,mathematicians, or...? Try to define the range of expertise for your audience. Try to imagine howmuch they know, how much they don't know, and how to make your points simple andunderstandable to them. Next, even though you have determined that most of your readers will havea certain level of understanding, not all will, so make allowances for them as well. Do not leaveeven the smaller readership groups completely out of your target. Sometimes it may be necessary toprovide extra explanations, illustrations, etc., for some of these smaller readership groups withinyour overall targeted audience. This can often be done using footnotes or appendices that don'totherwise intrude upon, or deviate from, the main discussion. Finally, determine a degree oftechnical expertise that you intend to address, and maintain that degree consistently throughout thepaper.

1.5. What should you include?

In general, include only enough information to make your points clearly and succinctly,and no more. Treat factual information with the respect it deserves, but do not overstate the issues. The report should provide adequate background, or history, to the problem under investigation, butshould not do so at the point of distraction from the main subject. It should stay focused on themain issues throughout the discussion, and should acknowledge both its range and limitations. Nopaper can address all issues relevant to any single problem, and to attempt to do so is distracting. Itis best to stick clearly with the main theme, and when necessary, suggest where readers could lookfor further related information, or where questions have been left necessarily unanswered. In thisway, your reader is focused on your intended message, is aware that you recognize the inherentlimitations in the discussion, and has ideas of where to look for related information.

1.6. What should you leave out?

There are two basic areas to avoid in report writing, in terms of Plain English. One is toavoid opinions, exaggerations, bias and other slanted viewpoints. Just let the facts speak for

themselves, and treat them impartially as a neutral observer. The conclusions you reach as a resultwill be stronger, and more convincing. The other area to avoid involves taking the reader onunnecessary detours. Often we have more information available to us than need be included in ourreport. We must learn that economy in most cases is preferred over comprehensiveness. Sometimes in the course of research, experiments have led to incorrect or useless conclusions. While it is tempting sometimes to discuss everything we studied in the course of our investigations,such detours are usually detracting and misleading. If the discussion does not in some waypositively and constructively support the main points of the report, then it is probably best to leavesuch discussions out.

Along these same lines, it is sometimes tempting to add an argument, or situation, whichis then quickly dismissed for lack of support or evidence, in favor of the “preferred” analysis. Unless this false argument truly demonstrates the utility of the preferred solution, it is best to avoidthese facades which simply get in the way of the main analysis. With these ideas concerning thetargeted reader, and how to organize our discussion, let us now turn to our main task, and considerthe various components of a research paper from the perspective of Plain English by observingcommon writing errors and their possible remedies.

CHAPTER TWOTITLES, ABSTRACTS, KEY WORD LISTS AND

INTRODUCTIONSContents

***

• Overview • 2.1. Titles • 2.2. Abstracts/Summaries • 2.3. Key Word Lists • 2.4. Introductions

• 2.4.a Introductory Statements: Introductions to Papers • 2.4.b. Introductory Statements: Introductions to sections and

paragraphs • 2.5. Introductions: Organization and Overview • 2.6. Introductions: Citations and References • 2.7. Introductions: Background versus History

Overview

In this first section, we look at the portions of the report that potential readers first see. These include titles, abstracts, key word lists and introductions. Each of these must be written insuch a way as to attract the readers so that the readers will wish to read the rest of your paper. Alsorelevant is that first impressions often set the tone for the rest of the paper. If a reader is positivelyimpressed, likely this impression will be carried through the rest of the paper, but on the other hand,if a reader begins with a negative first impression, it is unlikely the reader will overcome this “bias”and may in fact result in the early dismissal of the paper. For these reasons, each of these earlycomponents of a research paper plays an important role in the overall success or failure of yourpaper.

2.1. Titles

Titles are the first, and sometimes the only things readers will see. They should be well-constructed, understandable and clear. They need not be whole sentences, and should contain oneor more of the key words that define your article. Even here, Plain English can play a role. One ofthe Principles of Plain English, Economy, contains guidelines that combat wordiness, ambiguity andvagueness. Titles should not contain words we already can understand from context, such as “astudy of”, “an investigation of”, “a report on”, and so forth. Further, the titles should make specificreferences, not general ones, to the topics. Let us consider the following sets of poor and good titlesas an illustration. These are two different proposed titles for the two different papers.

(4) Poor Titles

a. A Report on Image Extraction Networksb. Image Extraction Using Linear Networks and Their Implementation Using ConstantTone Techniques Based on a Modified Legion Model

The problem with (4a) is that, though short, it is too general, or broad, while it provides unnecessaryinformation (you don’t need to tell us that it is a report). On the other hand, the title in (4b) is toolong, repetitive and confusing, where it can be shortened. In the following good examples, welengthened (4a) while restricting its scope. In (4b) we have deleted some of the unnecessarydetails. Both titles, as a result, have been improved.

(5) Good Titles

a. Image Extraction Networks and Tone-Pulse Modulation Techniquesb. Image Extraction in Linear Networks Using Constant Tone Techniques

Many people do article searches based on words in the title, so words should only be used if they areclearly and directly relevant to the contents of the article.

2.2. Abstracts/Summaries

Abstracts and summaries are the next most widely read part of any paper. They usuallyhave one of two purposes: (1) to describe, and (2) to inform. If their sole purpose is to describe, thisis usually accomplished in two or three sentences that simply elaborates on the main topic -- a kindof extended introductory statement. However, I have seen very few of these kinds of abstracts. Onthe other hand, abstracts, or summaries, which inform are quite common. Abstracts that informdescribe each of the sections of the paper in limited detail, providing a kind of general map, oroutline, for the reader regarding the specific contents of the paper.

As a general rule, abstracts should be around 150 words, and usually never more than 300words. More important than length, however, is that they should inform! What this means is thatthey should provide a brief, but complete, overview to the entire paper, including a reference to keyfindings and solutions, if any. Both the Principles of Cohesiveness (logical order, completestructure) and Directness (“state the bottom line succinctly”, among others) apply here. Thesummary should address in a logical order the nature of the question you pursued, what you did toinvestigate the issue, what results were obtained, and what conclusions you drew from theinvestigation. Since this is reporting on a past event, you should write in the past tense, though inthe discussion of your conclusion(s) (your last few sentences) you may bring things up to thepresent, and use the present tense.

There are two common errors often found in the abstract section; (a) the author isreluctant to reveal all, thereby forcing the reader to read the entire article in order to see if theinvestigation was successful or not, or what the solution was, and (b) the author treats the abstract asthe introduction to the paper, which only touches on the surface of what is actually discussed.

Let us consider what an abstract for this handbook (on Plain English) would be like. First, we will start with a poor example, containing some of the common problems found in manyabstracts.

(6) Poor Abstract

This handbook deals with a study of the problem of writing scientific research papers in

Plain English. The relationship of Plain English to the writing of scientific papers is animportant one. Scientific papers usually follow format guidelines established by thegoverning body or journal which oversees the specific scientific discipline. PlainEnglish is a system of English usage that begins with grammatically correct English andincorporates guidelines to promote the writing of English in such a way as to promote aone-to-one relationship between the writer’s intended message and the reader’sperceived message. (94 words)

In this poor example, we have the basic elements covered (Plain English and writing researchpapers), but we really have no idea of what will actually be covered in the article, and whether PlainEnglish is helpful or not. It is also too short, and tells us nothing about how the question, stated inthe first line, is either investigated or resolved. Let us consider a revised version, below.

(7) Good Abstract.

The system of Plain English, which guides precise usage of written English, was appliedto the task of writing technical and scientific research papers. Plain English consists offour basic principles (Cohesiveness, Economy, Directness and Appropriateness), 16general guidelines and 80 rules of implementation. These principles were applied to thewriting of research papers, papers that are generally designed to report on the results ofresearch investigations, specifically for the professional writer of English. Each of themajor sections of the research paper was reviewed, from the title to the conclusion, withpoor examples, representative of problems common to many research papersconsidered, and corrected, using the Principles of Plain English. Ultimately, it is shownthat Plain English can play an important role in the writing of technical and scientificresearch papers that will ensure maximum readability on the part of the targetedaudience. (144 words)

Though our model abstract is still a bit short, and not necessarily “perfect”, it covers most of thepoints raised above, and is suitable for a general handbook such as this.

2.3. Key Word Lists

Most journals require that a list of key words be included following the abstract. Generally, the key “words” may in fact be words or short phrases (which really should be limited tojust two or three words, if possible), and should usually be restricted to four or five separate entries. These expressions should be very directly related to the main points of your article. They should beboth specific and representative, and contain mostly nouns rich in content. Here too, let us considerpoor and good examples of what a key word list would look like for this article.

(8) Poor Key Word List for “Writing Technical and Scientific Research Papers in Plain English”

1. Principles of Plain English2. Cohesiveness, Directness, Economy and Appropriateness3. Scientific and technical papers4. Good and bad examples5. Revision

The above key word list contains too many words overall, and some words are too general to be ofany use (“good and bad”, for example) and too specific to be helpful (“Cohesiveness, Directness,Economy and Appropriateness”). Let us look at a revised list.

(9) (Good) Key Words for “Writing Technical and Scientific Research Papers in Plain English”

1. Plain English2. Writing research papers3. Scientific, technical English4. Readability

Note that the good examples overlap somewhat, but cover all of the basic topics that the paper isdirected towards. Note also that the title contains the first three of the five “key words”, reinforcinga point made earlier about titles, which should contain one or more of the key words (or phrases) ofthe ensuing discussion.

2.4. Introductions

The introduction to a research report is very important, and should accomplish at least 5specific goals. The introduction should (1) begin with an introductory statement that introduces themain idea, and what new or unique perspective is going to be pursued in the paper; (2) state thequestion, or problem, that is being investigated, and it should do so from the very first sentence, orat least the first paragraph; (3) provide a very brief overview of the problem, and the relevantresearch that led up to the present investigation; (4) provide a quick summary of each of the sectionsthat are found in the paper, and; (5) highlight the key conclusions elicited from the investigation. The first of these aspects of the introductory section, concerning the introductory statement, will bediscussed in some detail below.

2.4.a. Introductory Statements: Introductions to Papers

An introductory statement, usually the first sentence in the introduction, introduces themain idea, or point, under investigation, and the specific, or unique view that is adopted in regard tothis main point. Let us look at a poor example of the introductory statement.

(10) Poor Introductory Statement.

How to establish a network is explained here.

This takes the Principles of Economy and Directness to the extreme! It doesn’t, however, tell uswhat kind of network is being investigated, or why. Both Economy and Directness would requiremore precise terminology, and more elaborate phrasing.

(11) Good Introductory Statement

In this paper, we discuss how PC networks can be established so that positionalinformation can be transmitted to designated receivers.

Relevant Plain English Rules: 17Also, some authors treat the introduction simply as a continuation of the abstract. Or, similarly,many treat the abstract as if it were the introduction, and they use the introduction to begin theirargument. In fact, some actually start their argument, beginning with an equation, from the veryfirst sentence.

(12) Poor Introductory Statement

Let E=MC2, where mass is measured in […].

This violates the Principle of Cohesion, and misrepresents the purpose of the introductioncompletely. We cannot offer a revision of this introductory statement since it is in fact a statementin mid-discussion, and should be preceded by an adequate fully explanatory introductory statement. Below is a similar example for purposes of illustration, where the poor introductory statementseems to be written as if it were much further along in the discussion than it should be as theintroductory statement of the paper.

(13) Poor Introductory Statement

“Let C be an (N,K) binary linear block code and let VN be the set of the N-tuples overGF(2).”

We have corrected the introductory statement, below, by offering a prequel to the statement listedabove.

(14) Good Introductory Statement

In this paper, we present an algorithm to compute the weight distribution of cosetleaders for a code with smaller memory, although the time complexity may be larger.

Relevant Plain English Rules: 17Note that in this last example, we had to change the content of the statement significantly in orderfor it to serve as an adequate introductory statement. The information used, of course, was based onthe main points discussed in the article.

While we return to the issue concerning proper citations of resources in another section,below, let us observe an example here of how this problem can be corrected, an example whichactually addresses two problems of reference.

(15) Poor Introductory Statement

Recently, VTS [1], which aims at reducing white noise rates, has beensuccessfully implemented.

One problem with (15) is that it assumes the reader knows what “VTS” stands for, and, as pointedout above, it also uses a reference that contains no useful associative information (“[1]”) -- both areinappropriate from the standpoint of Cohesiveness, certainly, at least, in the introductory statement. In substantiating, or supporting, points in the discussion, it is best not to assume the reader knowseverything, and even if he or she does, you should make it easier on the reader by providing areminder at least when new or unusual terms are first introduced. Also, in the introduction andelsewhere, it significantly slows the reader down if you use abstract citation references, with nouseful semantic or referential content. Let us see a revised version of (15).

(16) Good Introductory Statement

We were able to successfully implement the Voice Transfer System (VTS), firstproposed by Suzuki, 1999 ([1]), which aims at reducing white noise rates.

Relevant Plain English Rules: 17, 33

Note the following set of examples for further illustration.

(17) Poor Introductory Statement

“Recently, ITS [1], which aim at making safety, pleasant, and efficienttransportation by solving traffic accidents, traffic jam, environmental pollution, andenergy problems, have attracted the attention of the world.”

(18) Good Introductory Statement

Recently, Intelligent Transport Systems, ITS (Bender, 1991, [1]), which aim atmaking transportation safe, pleasant, and efficient by solving the problems of trafficaccidents, traffic jams, energy shortages and environmental pollution, have attracted theattention of the world.

Relevant Plain English Rules: 17, 33A final alternative to handling the distraction of references in the introduction is more economical,and that is to simply delete them, and focus on the main idea discussed in the body of the paper.

2.4.b. Introductory Statements: Introductions to sections and paragraphs

Elsewhere in your paper (beyond the first statement in the introduction), introductorystatements are found at the head (beginning) of every paragraph. They similarly introduce to thereader what the paragraph (and/or section) will be about, and should include reference to the mainpoints, and how these points will be viewed. As such, they begin a thought, and should nottherefore look as if they are simply continuations of the previous discussions (though of coursetransitions are important, as we will note below). To illustrate this, in the following poor example,the introductory statement uses “this” which refers to previously stated information, which shouldbe avoided (in the first sentence of a new paragraph). Words that ambiguously refer to previouslydiscussed information, particularly pronouns (“it”, “they”, “this”, “these”, etc.) should be avoided inmost introductory statements.

(19) Poor Introductory Statement

“This test chip consisted of 64 x 64 cells, two base generators […].”

(20) Good Introductory Statement

Our test chip consisted of 64 x 64 cells, two base generators […].

Relevant Plain English Rules: 17, 16Below is another set of examples of introductory statements taken from elsewhere in the text (notfrom the introduction) where most of the same points discussed above still hold true, though here,the statement’s scope is limited to just a single paragraph (or a section).

(21) Poor Introductory Statement

“How to reboot is explained here.”

This last poor example has very little useful information, and therefore ignores the basic role of theintroductory statement which is to introduce the main idea of the paragraph, and the point of focus. We don't know what is being “rebooted”, nor why.

(22) Good Introductory Statement

We now discuss the reboot conditions in the PC scheme so that the originaldefault information is transmitted to the receiver.

Relevant Plain English Rules: 17, 16

We will return to the idea of introductory statements, particularly as they are used inparagraphs and sections elsewhere in the discussion (beyond the introduction) in other portions ofthis handbook, as they play a central role in providing adequate transitions from one paragraph toanother, and from one section to another. For here, though, it should be sufficient to summarize thatintroductions play a key role in any research paper, and should introduce the subject, provide a briefbackground to the problem, and give a general overview of the rest of the paper, includingthehighlights of key findings. Introductory statements, the first sentences a reader sees in the maindiscussion of the paper should be attractive and inviting. They should inform and interest thereader, and they should not contain distractions that would otherwise send the reader anywhere elsebut to the following sentence.

2.5. Introductions: Organization and Overview

Introductions play three important roles in any paper. First, they should attract thereader's attention. They should compel the reader to want to read further. This is often difficult ina research paper, but some attention to this idea should be given. Opening statements may beprovocative, controversial, challenging or thought-provoking. They should not be dull and lifeless,however, nor should they appear to be in mid-discussion. If your subject is important andinteresting enough to write a paper about, you must appeal to the readers' interests in such a way asto draw them into your report. Second, an introduction should clearly state the main topic, orthesis, of the report, as well as the point of view that you are taking towards this topic. It should tellthe reader specifically what question is being addressed, what hypothesis is being tested, or whatproblems are being resolved. To this end, as mentioned above, it should also give the reader anindication of the answers, the results, and the conclusions that you have developed as a result ofyour investigations (see Appendix C, Step 2, for further discussion of the basic research question, orstatement). Finally, an introduction should tell the reader specifically what will be covered in thepaper, and in what order, giving the reader a section-by-section guide to the rest of the paper.

In dealing with this last point, unnecessary abbreviations should be avoided; too often Ihave seen “Section”, abbreviated to “Sect.”, where the savings is just two type spaces! Theresulting abbreviation is both unattractive and unnecessary. Below, and throughout the text, pleasenote that we have not repeated the entire text of the overview, and have instead using the brackets,“[...]”, to indicate deleted content.

(25) Poor Overview

This paper is organized as follows. In Sect. 2 we briefly review […] In Sect. 2,we briefly review […] In Sect. 3. […] are briefly reviewed. In Sect. 4, we review briefly[…] Finally, the conclusion is given in Sect. 5.

The above overview suffers from repetition (a violation of Cohesiveness), as well as needlessabbreviations (also a violation of Cohesiveness). Further, this form of an overview, though quitecommon, is not all that useful, particularly since it does not suggest in any way what the actualconclusions are?it simply tells us where to find them, which we know already.

(26) Better Overview

This paper is organized as follows. In Section 2, we briefly review […] InSection 3, we consider […] In Section 4, the results of our study are presented, dealingwith […] In Section 5, we offer a new analysis regarding […] Finally, in Section 6 weconclude by noting that [...].

Relevant Plain English Rules: 32 , 31, 2

Other problems in the introductory section have to do with length and relevance. Toomany authors seem to think the introduction is the background, or history section. While it isperfectly fine to deal with some of the earlier analyses that relate to the present topic in theintroduction, it should not detract from the main purpose of the introduction, which is to set acourse for the reader regarding what will be considered, why, and in what order. If a lengthyhistorical discussion is necessary, it should be set apart from the introduction in a following sectiondevoted specifically to that purpose (a section on the background, or history of the problem).

Even in this section of the report (the “overview” of the paper), which follows a fairlyroutine formula, every statement must have some useful information to convey. In this last exampleof this section, very little content of any value is offered.

(27) Bad

“Finally, the paper is concluded with some remarks.”

While this statement obviously comes at the end of the overview in the introduction, and naturallyaddresses expected territory, it must tell us something of value, which it does not. The “good”example, though not perfect, offers a slight improvement over the original.

(28) Good

Finally, in Section 5, we summarize our findings and suggest possible directions forfuture investigations.

Relevant Plain English Rules: 33, 34, 24

2.6. Introductions: Citations and References

We have already introduced this topic above, but it deserves special mention in its ownright. While many journals specify how to format reference citations, it is wrong to think that theseguidelines are necessarily sufficient for the reader to read and understand the text easily. Suchguidelines are designed to ensure that proper credit has been given to the original authors, but arenot designed necessarily to encourage or ensure readability. So, I advise that of course you shouldfollow the guidelines of the specific journal in dealing with references and citations, but, certainly inthe introductions at least, some additional help can be given the readers, as illustrated in thefollowing examples.

(29) Bad

“Wireless network systems introducing both of the cellular concept and the ad-hocconcept have been proposed [6], [7].”

Keeping in mind that we are looking at a statement taken from the introduction, let us put ourselves

in the reader's shoes. We have just started reading a new article, and immediately, we come to thenumerical references “[6],[7]”. It is virtually impossible for us to guess what these references mightrefer to, so, in order to proceed, we must then go to the reference page, and look up the information. Over time, if these citations are repeated, we may be able to remember, or associate, the keyinformation with the numerical references. However, for their first introduction, a little bit of helpwould be very useful, as indicated in the following good example.

(30) Good

Wireless network systems introducing both the cellular and the ad-hoc concept havebeen proposed (Suzuki, 1993 [6], Aoki 1999 [7]).

Relevant Plain English Rules: 71, 72

2.7. Introductions: Background versus History

Many writers seem to have a difficult time differentiating between the purpose of theintroduction, and the possible separate sections of background or history. An introduction shouldprovide only the briefest of background or historical information, just enough for the reader tounderstand where the current research fits into the continuum of investigations on the subject. Ifextensive historical or background information is necessary, then a separate section should bewritten, usually just following the introduction. Many authors have combined the introduction withan extensive background or historical discussion, and as a result, have discouraged many readersfrom pursuing the article any further. It is necessary to break the text up into logical sections, whereeach section plays a clearly defined role in the overall paper. An introduction should introduce thesubject, while a section on the background, or history, should provide the necessary foundationsupon which the present research was undertaken. The introduction should only very briefly coverthese preliminary issues.

CHAPTER THREEMAIN BODY: GENERAL WRITING GUIDELINES

Contents

• Overview • 3.1. Cohesion

• 3.1.a. Using Articles • 3.1.a.i. When not to use articles: General statements and “mass” nouns • 3.1.a.ii. Inserting articles where they have been omitted • 3.1.a.iii. Wrong article choices

• 3.1.b. Dense Text • 3.1.b.i. Problems with the Merging of Mathematical Expressions and

English • 3.1.b.ii. Controlling overly long statements

• 3.1.c. Use the Active Voice in Favor of the Passive • 3.1.d. Transitions • 3.1.e. Consistency

• 3.1.e.i. Tense • 3.1.e. ii. Number • 3.1.e.iii. Parallel structures • 3.1.e.iv. Abbreviations

• 3.1.f. Capitalization and Punctuation • 3.1.g. Argument Support: Facts and opinions

• 3.2. Economy • 3.2.a. Repetition • 3.2.b. Wordiness • 3.2.c. Redundancy • 3.2.d. Conjunctions

• 3.3. Directness • 3.3.a. Visualize your Message • 3.3.b. Concrete • 3.3.c Pronouns • 3.3.d. Word category change • 3.3.e. Avoid (multiple) negatives • 3.3.f. Avoid Lexical Ambiguity: Wrong word choice • 3.3.g. Avoid Lexical Ambiguity: Avoid vague terms • 3.3.h. Word Usage: “much” • 3.3.i. Avoid Syntactic Ambiguity: Scope, word order, adjectives and adverbs

• 3.4. Appropriateness • 3.4.a. Appropriateness: Avoid conversational forms • 3.4.b. Appropriateness: Adopt neutral, semi-formal, semi-polite style

Overview

In this chapter we cover a few of the most common usage problems, including thoseinvolving articles, repetition, wordiness and redundancy, merging of mathematics expressions and

English, and passives. Since our purpose here is not to provide a comprehensive guide to usageerrors found in research papers, but rather simply an introduction to such errors, and how thePrinciples of Plain English may be relevant in their revision, we will only consider a fewrepresentative examples of each of the most common types of errors found in the main body of thetext.

3.1. Cohesion

As noted earlier, The Principle of Cohesiveness is composed of four basic rules. Theserules are: (a) Conform to Context; (b) Be Consistent; (c) Use a Logical Order, and; (d) AvoidDistractions. In this section, we will look at violations of some of the more noticeable areas ofEnglish usage, and provide explanations involving the rules governed by the Plain English Principleof Cohesiveness in overcoming them. One of the most frequently misused parts of English involvesthe articles, so we begin with them here.

3.1.a. Using Articles

Articles (or determiners), specifically “a”, “an” and “the”, are the most frequentlymisused parts of English sentence structure. The usage of these articles is governed by the Principleof Cohesiveness in Plain English, which provides a few basic guidelines for proper usage. Thereare many kinds of observed errors involving articles, including using them when they should not beused (such as in general statements), using the wrong ones (such as “the” for “a”, and vice versa), ornot using them when they should be used. We will look at each type of misuse below.

3.1.a.i. When not to use articles: General statements and “mass” nouns

First, in general statements, which often characterize the observations made in ascientific report, articles are not used, since general statements are usually in the plural. Manyerrors occur when writers attempt to write general statements by using singular references. Note thefollowing examples.

(31) Poor Examples of General Statements

a. Therefore, to avoid the deterioration [...].

b. The white noise filter absorbs a motion information [...].

In both cases, above, these general statements can be improved by simply deleting the articles.

(32) Good Examples of General Statements

a. Therefore, to avoid deterioration [...].

b. The white noise filter absorbs motion information [...].

Relevant Plain English Rules : 15Below are several more pairs of examples where articles should be omitted, due to the generalnature of the statements.

One of the most difficult aspects of proper English usage, and one of the most commonproblems found in the IEICE articles was the improper use of articles in making general statements

that involved “mass”, or “non-count” nouns. Note the following examples. We will look at othermisuses of articles below.

(33) Bad

a. “Therefore, to avoid the degradation [...].”

b. “3D filters are efficient for removing an additive noise [...].”

c. “The Video-DDWA filter has a motion information as the [...].”

In the first sentence, a general condition is being described, so articles are not necessary--this is likeour first examples, above. In the second of the three bad examples, however, we see “an” used with“additive noise”, but as “noise” is not “countable” it can’t be modified by “an”. Nouns that are notcountable (mass nouns), such as “oil” or “sugar” of course can‘t have “one” (as in “an oil/one oil”),as opposed to countable nouns such as “apples” (as in “an apple/one apple”). Finally, in the thirdexample, we have a similar problem as in the second, where “information” is a mass noun, so noarticles are necessary.

(34) Good

a. Therefore, to avoid degradation [...].

b. 3D filters are efficient for removing additive noise [...].

c. The Video-DDWA filter has motion information as the [...].

Relevant Plain English Rules : 15The following is another problem with the mass/count noun distinction.

(35) Bad

“In the systems with only one microphone, extracting a speech form from a speechdegraded by additive background noise requires the use of SS method.”

This is a simple example of incorrectly using an article with a “mass” noun (“speech”).

(36) Good

In the systems with only one microphone, extracting a speech sample from speechdegraded by additive background noise requires the use of the SS method.

Relevant Plain English Rules : 15Below are several more examples of sentences that have articles that are not necessary.

(37) Bad

“We have found all the four weights of coset leaders by only generating five pairs [...]without generating all the 16 pairs.”

In this case, we might place “the” before “weights”, as in “all four of the weights”, but in theinterest of economy, and because this is a general statement, this isn't necessary. Notice, however,that we do need “the” before “coset” because this is a specific entity (see discussion below, on using

“the”).

(38) Good

We have found all four weights of the coset leaders by generating only five pairs [...]without generating all 16 pairs.

Relevant Plain English Rules : 15, 37Next, we see a similar problem.

(39) Bad

“In the following, due to the space limitation, we mainly focus on the differencesbetween the proposed algorithm and the original Wong-Liu algorithm.”

This example is a good illustration of the problem in general statements. Usually, such statementsrequire the subject nouns in the plural, and as such, does not need an article.

(40) Good

In the following, due to space limitations, we mainly focus on the differences betweenthe proposed algorithm and the original Wong-Liu algorithm.

Relevant Plain English Rules : 15, 27, 76

(41) Bad

“If the larger generations of checkpoints are frequently executed, the larger overheadfor them will be incurred.”

This is a clear case of general statements where articles are not desirable.

(42) Good

If larger generations of checkpoints are frequently executed, larger overhead for themwill be incurred.

Relevant Plain English Rules: 15In this next example, we have multiple uses of articles that should be avoided.

(43) Bad

“This paper describes a new approach to the digital watermarking of motionpictures...which intends to enhance the error detection ability. The conventional methodlacks not only the detection ability but also the compatibility with vision decoderswidely used today.”

The italicized articles, above, all can be omitted. This is because they are used in generalstatements, such as “apples are good for you”, and should not be referred to as specific instances, oroccurrences, of the items in focus. Also, “intends to enhance” is wordy and has been reduced to“enhance”.

(44) Good

This paper describes a new approach to the digital watermarking of motion pictures...enhances error detection ability. The conventional method lacks not only detectionability but also compatibility with vision decoders widely used today.

Relevant Plain English Rules : 15, 57For another look at the improper multiple use of articles in general statements, let us consider thefollowing.

(45) Bad

“In the encoder the check marker embedding can be a promising key technology of theerror detection. The check marking is to embed [...] and hence it causes the picturequality degradation [...].”

As in the last example, the italicized articles can be omitted because they are used in generalstatements.

(46) Good

In the encoder check marker embedding can be a promising key technology for errordetection check marking is to embed [...] and hence it causes picture quality degradation[...].

Relevant Plain English Rules: 15In the following example, there are two different problems with articles.

(47) Bad

“Assuming that the background noise is represented as generated by exciting a linearsystem with a white noise, then we can reconstruct the background noise from theprediction error signal by estimating the transfer function of noise generation system.”

This last example actually contains two problems with articles. The first treats noise as countablenoun, which it is not, so “a” should be omitted. The second should recognize “noise generationsystem” as a specific known entity, and as such, requires the definite article.

(48) Good

We can reconstruct the background noise, assuming that it is represented as beinggenerated by exciting a linear system with white noise, from the prediction error signalby estimating the transfer function of the noise generation system.

Relevant Plain English Rules : 15, 6, 5

We conclude this first portion on article misuse, involving when not to use articles, witha poor example that has two possible solutions.

(49) Bad

“By adopting the CMI for the same code of (15, 17), the upper bound shows theimprovement of 0.5dB and the simulation results show the improvement of 0.3dB.”

In this last example, the definite article “the”, should either be changed to the indefinite article “an”,or it should be omitted.

(50) Good

By adopting the CMI for the same code of (15, 17), the upper bound showsimprovement of 0.5 dB and the simulation results show improvement of 0.3 dB.

(or)

By adopting the CMI for the same code of (15, 17), the upper bound shows animprovement of 0.5 dB and the simulation results show an improvement of 0.3 dB.

Relevant Plain English Rules: 15

3.1.a.ii. Inserting articles where they have been omitted

Sometimes, articles are omitted when they should be included. The remedy here is justto follow one of two basic rules. Use the indefinite article, “a” or “an”, when the noun which isbeing modified is unspecific, previously unknown or unimportant; it may be “any one of many”. On the other hand, use the definite article, “the”, when the noun being modified is specific, knownor important; it is “a particular one of possibly many”.

(51) Bad Example of Omitted Articles

This paper describes new way to handle IT network [...].

In this last example, there are two omitted articles, one before “new” and the other before “IT”. Inthe latter case, you have a choice of using “an” if any IT network is applicable (not “a”), or “the” if aspecific one is referred to.

(52) Good

This paper describes a new way to handle the IT network [...].

Relevant Plain English Rules: 15Consider another example of an omitted article.

(53) Bad

“Because the outline is to be closed, blocks situated in one-block wide structure arepassed twice or more.”

This is another example where an indefinite article needs to be added to the text.

(54) Good

Because the outline is to be closed, blocks situated in a one-block wide structure arepassed two or more times.

Relevant Plain English Rules : 37, 15

(55) Bad

“The function h(x) is called switching function in this paper and satisfies the followingrelationship; [...].”

Similar to the last example, we need to insert an indefinite article before the noun, or noun phrase,in focus.

(56) Good

The function h(x) is called a switching function and satisfies the following relationship;[...].

Relevant Plain English Rules : 15, 56

(57) Bad

“As effective query vectors, let us introduce V1, V2, and V3, which will respectively beused to determine whether a term ds is odd number or even [...].”

This is a relatively straightforward example where we have indefinite nouns which require theaddition of the indefinite articles, “an”.

(58) Good

As effective query vectors, let us introduce V1, V2, and V3, which will respectively beused to determine whether a term ds is an odd or an even number [...].

Relevant Plain English Rules: 15

(59) Bad

“However, in case that the Signal to Noise Ratio (SNR) is low, the DSP-PLL can notpull in the frequency offset and the phase offset [...].”

It is difficult to determine whether the error in the bad example is caused by simple article omission,or a misuse of the phrase “in case”. Whatever the cause, “case” in this context is a noun thatrequires an article.

(60) Good

However, in the case that the Signal to Noise Ratio (SNR) is low, the DSP-PLL can notpull in the frequency offset and the phase offset [...].

Relevant Plain English Rules: 15Since the misuse, through omission, of articles and the noun “case” was common, I have includedtwo more examples here.

(61) Bad

a. “In case the bit rate of the modulation signal [...].

b. “In case the average and the variance [...].”

In both “cases”, the definite article is necessary. Think of “case” as “situation”, such as “in thesituation where positive results outnumber negative ones...”.

(62) Good

a. In the case that the rate of the modulation signal [...].

b. In the case where the average and the variance [...].

Relevant Plain English Rules: 15

In this next example, we see the first occurrence of the confusion over how to use theword “above”. Here, we look at it from the viewpoint of article usage, while in other sections wewill take different perspectives. (Please note that in the next example, and throughout the rest of thetext, mathematical equations, such as “2 + 2 = 4”, have been replaced by the expression [equation],for the purposes of both clarity and brevity.)

(63) Bad

“From above considerations, the [equation] is composed of the narrow band signal andthe wide band signal.”

The error in this statement may be as a result over the confusion of how to use “above”, or it may bedue to solely problems with article usage. Think of “above considerations” in this context assubstituting for a larger statement such as “the considerations presented above”, and as such, treat itas a noun phrase (specific), and use the definite article.

(64) Good

From the above considerations, the [equation] is composed of the narrow band signaland the wide band signal.

Relevant Plain English Rules: 15

Finally, in this portion of when to insert articles that have been omitted, we come to asituation that involves acronyms. Acronyms are abbreviations, such as FYI, which stands for “foryour information”, and are usually made from combining the first letters of each word in the targetphrase. These are specific, known nouns, and as such, require the definite article, as isdemonstrated in the following pair of examples.

(65) Bad

“BBS method can estimate the noise level without voice/voiceless section detector, at anexpense of increase in computation load.”

(66) Good

The BBS method can estimate the noise level without a voice/voiceless section detector,at the expense of increase in computation load.

Relevant Plain English Rules: 15

3.1.a.iii. Wrong article choices

Sometimes, however, articles get entangled with phrases and end up misused as a result.

While I observed many situations (in the IEICE papers) where the definite article was used, whenthe indefinite one should have been used, and vice versa, I include just a few representativeexamples here, since the rules of usage are identical to those stated above in our other sections onarticle usage. We will then conclude this section by looking at a common related problemconcerning the words “another” (“an other”), and “the other”.

(67) Bad

“In this scenario, block cipher designers must prove the MDCP is enough small, as thesecurity evaluation against differential cryptanalysis.”

Here, we see the definite article replaced below with the indefinite. The reason for this is that it islikely the “security evaluation” is not a single, one time, isolated event, but rather, something that isperformed repeatedly, and as such, is just “one of many”, and should therefore be modified with anindefinite determiner.

(68) Good

In this scenario, block cipher designers must prove the MDCP is small enough, as asecurity evaluation against differential cryptanalysis.

Relevant Plain English Rules : 15, 37The following is a simpler example of the indefinite article replacing the definite article, as well asproblems with the expression “which is open”. The reason the indefinite article, “a”, is used isbecause it refers to the origin of the “question”, which, since it would be the first mention of it,would be (previous to that) unknown, and as such, unspecific, or indefinite. After it was first raised,it then becomes specific, and would require the use of the definite article “the”.

(69) Bad

“This paper is concerned with the question which is open since 1986.”

(70) Good

This paper is concerned with a question first raised in 1986.

Relevant Plain English Rules : 15, 37, 76

We know consider a few examples concerning “another” and the misuse of articles.

(71) Bad

From the other point of view, procedural view point, local networks [...].

Here, we have an interesting use of “the other” for the word “another” (“an” + “other”), also, thereis awkwardness as a result of repetition (a violation of Economy). These have been repaired in thefollowing sentence. Note that in this situation, we have chosen to negate the problem with “theother/another” by shortening the sentence (deleting it) in the interest of economy.

(72) Good

From the procedural view point, local networks [...].

Relevant Plain English Rules: 15

In the next set of examples, we take the direct route, and replace “the other” with“another”.

(73) Bad

“From the other point of view, industrial view point, logic circuits in actual productsshould not contain so much logical redundancy to guarantee high testability of thecircuits.”

Note that we have also corrected a problem involving “much”, a term so often misused that it has itsown section, which is presented elsewhere below.

(74) Good

From another point of view, the industrial view point, logic circuits in actual productsshould not contain a significant amount of logical redundancy in order to guarantee hightestability of the circuits.

Relevant Plain English Rules : 15, 5, 37, 33While there are many more examples of misused articles that could be discussed here, let usconclude by observing the three main points suggested above; (1) write most generalizations in theplural form, with no articles, (2) use the indefinite articles, “a” or “an”, before nouns that areunknown, unimportant and unspecific, and (3) use the definite article, “the”, when the nouns areknown, important and specific.

3.1.b. Dense Text

Dense text refers to text that has no paragraph breaks, and continues through severaldifferent thought groups, while often merging complex expressions and equations into the text. Dense text can also be sentences that are too long, and contain too many dependent and independentclauses, to the point that the reader can not follow the argument easily. In both cases, we want tomake it easier for the reader to understand what we wish to communicate, so we want to takemeasures to avoid dense text. We will look at both types of problems below, beginning first withsome discussion concerning how to deal with the merging of mathematical expressions and Englishgrammar.

3.1.b.i. Problems with the Merging of Mathematical Expressions and English

In this section we will present two examples of a problem that can be found in manyscientific research papers that deal with mathematical, or algebraic, equations. Namely, somewriters consider the syntactic rules of English grammar and the syntactic rules of algebraicequations to either be on a par with one another, or to have no discernible division between the two. As a result, equations often get merged inextricably with the written word, making for very difficultand tedious reading. As an example, suppose we take a simple equation such as the following: “two plus two equals four”. Even though this is a very simple mathematicalexpression, in prose, it looks quite confusing?imagine how it would be if theexpression were truly complex, as most engineering expressions are? We suggesthere to give a prose description of the mathematical expression, and themathematical equivalent, and to keep the two separate. For our simple example,we could do this in the following way: “…two plus two equals four (2 + 2 = 4)…”,but for longer and more complex expressions, it is best to split the forms of

expression up. A good rule to follow here (guided by the principle of Cohesion) is a simpleone; separate equations from the written text by using numbered formulas, offset by spaces beforeand after the indented formulas. This will allow the mathematicians amongst us to be able to scanthe equations easily, and the rest of us to read the text (argumentation), just as easily.

(75) Bad. Equations Merged with Text.

A tri-set over a non-empty set NES is a function T: NES => IN, i.e., for each nes < NES, T(nes) denotes the number of occurrences of nes in T [...].

The passage on which the bad text is loosely based actually continues on in this manner for severaldense paragraphs! This kind of writing style has merged algebra with English in such a way as torender both rather difficult to read, thereby violating the basic tenets of Plain English. What weshould see is a general description of the equation in prose, and a clearly delineated equation listedapart from the prose, something like the following (this is not an actual equation, just anillustration).

(76) Good. Equations Separated from Text.

In the following figure, we have a tri-set (T) over a non-empty set (NES),where there are repeated occurrences of NES, represented as nes. The number ofoccurrences of nes is denoted by the formula of T times nes. Please note the following.

(1) T: NES => IN (where nes < NES; T(nes) = #T/NES)

Relevant Plain English Rules : 67, 65, 68, 55For illustration purposes, the point of the last example is to show that equations first need to begenerally explained, and then written, separate from the English prose, so that maximum clarity isachieved. In some cases this explanation may follow the equation, but usually it precedes it. Let usconsider one more example, below.

(77) Bad

“The i-th checkpoint is generated as soon as the total operation time since the (i-1)stcheckpoint reaches the length Si(i = 1,2,...).”

The problem here is one of logical inconsistency. Is this a mathematical expression, or is it anEnglish sentence? It really should be clearly one or the other. While I have attempted to rewritethis example into intelligible English prose, the question still remains as to whether this should bewritten in a sentence format at all, as opposed to a purely mathematical equation.

(78) Good

The checkpoint, i-th, is generated soon as the total operation time since the checkpoint, (i-1)st, reaches the length, Si(i = 1,2,...).

Relevant Plain English Rules : 68, 23, 18As noted, above, the “good” example is still not the best solution. If this could be made into anequation, and separated from the text altogether, it would be better still. I conclude this brief sectionby emphasizing the importance to clearly separate English prose from mathematical equations--notto do so unnecessarily diminishes the overall readability of the text significantly, and is quitedistracting.

3.1.b.ii. Controlling overly long statements

Overly long sentences represent another example of “dense text”, which makes itdifficult for the reader to understand our intended message. It is a little simpler combating thisproblem, and essentially becomes one of where to insert sentence breaks, and perhaps, where tointroduce appropriate transition, or linking, terms.

The following is one sentence similar to many others in a fairly well written paper. It isproblematic for two reasons. One is because the sentence is simply too long, and is nearlyimpossible to comprehend as a result. The other is that it is an illustrative example of howmathematical syntax and language grammar have been merged to form a rather complicated syntaxof its own, a problem discussed in the last section. This is to be avoided in the interest of clarity ofexpression and understanding.

(79) Bad

“Namely, we will represent the maximum delay d(v,0) (d(v,1)) spent for transmittinglogic value 0 (1) from a primary input to terminal v by the longest path length d(v0) (d(v1) from a source to 0-vertex (1-vertex) of terminal v, where the longest path length d(x) from a source to vertex x is the maximum sum of weights of edges on a path from asource to x.”

While it is easy to point out what is wrong with the bad example, it is less easy to provide asolution. Let us start with the problems. First and foremost, the single sentence is much too long(with more than sixty “words”!--the usual sentence has between twelve and twenty words), and theobvious solution is to break it up into more manageable chunks. The second problem, noted above,is the integration of mathematical formulas into the sentences as if they are interchangeable systems,which they are not. When possible, it is best to simply write these formulas as formal equations andset them apart from the main discussion. While I cannot suggest how to write the formal equationshere, I will at least suggest how the text could be parsed into smaller segments.

(80) Better

Namely, we will represent the maximum delay d(v,0) (d(v,1)) spent for transmittinglogic value 0 (1). The logic value 0 (1) is derived from a primary input to terminal v bythe longest path length d(v0) (d(v1) from a source to 0-vertex (1-vertex) of terminal v. The longest path length d(x) from a source to vertex x is the maximum sum of weightsof edges on a path from a source to x.

Relevant Plain English Rules : 67, 64, 3, 54Let us consider one more set of examples of dense text here.

(81) Bad

“Equation (1) is reformulated not only using the Euclidian distance and but also byusing the weight of code word tension to the case of an inter-symbol-interferencechannel since the Euclidean distance is not proportional to the Hamming distance andthe Euclidian distance depends on the combination of information bits and parity bitsafter an ISI channel.”

This sentence suffers from many problems, including those involving conjunctions, prepositions,articles, word choice and sentence length (all in one sentence). The results are quite confusingwhen presented as a single complete statement. Some of the errors have been italicized in the both

the bad and good examples.

(82) Good

Equation (1) is reformulated not only by using the Euclidean distance but also byapplying the weight of the code word tension to the case of an inter-symbol-interferencechannel. This is because the Euclidean distance is not proportional to the Hammingdistance and the Euclidean distance depends on the combination of information bits andparity bits after an ISI channel.

Relevant Plain English Rules : 67, 54, 33, 15, 62

3.1.c. Use the Active Voice in Favor of the Passive

Here we deal with the overuse of the passive voice, a problem that is quite common inmost research papers, where we favor the use of the active voice. Let us first consider thedifferences between an active and a passive sentence. The sentence, “John threw the ball to Susan”is a simple active sentence. However, the passive version of this is not so simple: “A ball wasthrown to Susan by John.” The passive sentence is longer (by two words), harder to understand, andultimately, awkward. It is, however, grammatical. Because they are grammatical, passives mayseem like they shouldn’t be a problem, but as pointed out above, grammaticality alone does notequate to readability.

Since we are not assuming the reader of this handbook is particularly interested in, orknowledgeable of, the very fine nuances that define the proper rules of English grammar, we willrefer to both true passives, as illustrated above, and pseudo-passives (sentences that have the lookand feel of passives, usually by placing subjects and/or verbs after objects and other prepositionalphrases).

Now that we know what passives are, why are they particularly problematic forforeign writers of English? One reason is that both true passives, and pseudo-passives, are used anunusually large amount of the time. The reason for the extended use of passives by Japanesewriters, for example, can easily be traced to the differences in the basic word order of Japanese andEnglish. The most common English sentence has a subject-verb-object (SVO) word order, whilethe common Japanese sentence has the order of subject-object-verb (SOV). It is this placement ofthe verb at the end in Japanese that appears to be carried over to the writing of English, which in sodoing, creates passive structures in English. There are also other factors which cause the overuse ofpassives, such as the Japanese tendency to favor indirect subject reference (often leaving the subjectout entirely). Why is this a problem? Since English is primarily written in the active voice, whenusing the SVO word order, it takes readers extra time, and requires additional effort, in order to readand understand passive sentences, which employ a SOV word order. So, following the Principle ofCohesiveness, we want to make it easier on the reader to understand.

There is also a reason based on the Principle of Economy to avoid passives; namely,passive expressions are usually “wordier” than actives. In other words, to state the equivalent activeexpression in English in the passive voice usually requires relatively more words in the passive thanin the active.

Of course there are occasions when passives are useful (such as when we want to focuson the object, rather than the subject), but for the most part, the best formula to follow is to avoidusing passives as much as possible. Since this is a very common problem, and a major impedimentto achieving success in Plain English, we have included a large number of representative examples.

(83) Bad

“Miller, et al. [8] has been proposed an adaptive predictive PID control scheme basedon a generalized predictive control (GPC) [10] criterion.”

This is a very simple illustration of one of the most common problems found in technical writing. Note that the passive form not only reverses the logical sentence structure of English, it also addstwo more words in doing so.

(84) Good

Miller, et al. [8] proposed an adaptive predictive PID control scheme based on ageneralized predictive control (GPC) criterion [10].

Relevant Plain English Rules : 6, 5, 4Here is another similar, simple example of the poor use of the passive.

(85) Bad

“On the other hand, as one of self-tuning control schemes for such systems, GPCscheme [10] had been proposed by Clarke et al.”

The solution of course is to reverse word order to the active voice.

(86) Good

On the other hand, Clarke et al. proposed the GPC scheme as one of self-tuning controlschemes for such systems [10].

Relevant Plain English Rules : 5, 6, 7

We now consider a variety of slightly more complex problems with the passive construction.

(87) Bad

a. Here the problem of white noise is discussed.

b. To verify the results, a series of simulations were performed.

c. Determining the specifications of the bandwidths, for which our experiments havebeen attempted from the following aspects.

In all three poor examples, we have passives which place the verbs after the subjects, therebyrequiring readers to scan to the end of the sentences first before being able to understand themcompletely. Let us consider the revised versions.

(88) Good

a. Here, we discuss the problem of white noise.

b. We performed a series of simulations to verify the results.

c. We attempted several experiments to determine the specifications of the bandwidths.

Relevant Plain English Rules : 5, 6, 4

Next is a common mistake of word order, where the main verb has been attached at theend, in a passive-like of construction, where it should be placed within the main clause of thesentence.

(89) Bad

“Here, the problem of algorithm HL is discussed.”

The repair here is very simple; just move the verb into active position, preceding the object. To dothis, of course, we would also need to insert a subject, as I have done (“we”). Notice, too, we haveinserted a missing article (“the”).

(90) Good

Here, we discuss the problem of the algorithm HL.

Relevant Plain English Rules : 5, 6, 4

The next two examples are obvious cases of passives that should be actives.

(91) Bad

a. “To verify the practicability..., simulation have been performed...”

b. “The specifications of simulations[...], for which our experiments have beenattempted from the following aspects.”

In both cases, the “have been PAST PARTICIPLE” needs to be repaired. This will again requireinsertion of a subject, such as “we”, and bringing the verb forward.

(92) Good

To verify the practicability..., we performed simulations...

We attempted several experiments on the specification of simulations based on thefollowing conditions.

Relevant Plain English Rules : 5, 6, 4Note a similar example, with a different subject.

(93) Bad

“As an empirical model which is developed to fit collected data a mixture model iscommonly used.”

This is another problem of placing the verb at the end of the sentence, which is contrary to the basiclogic of English sentence structure.

(94) Good

A mixture model is commonly used as an empirical model which is developed to fitcollected data.

Relevant Plain English Rules : 37, 6, 4Next is another example of the poor placement of the verb in sentence-final position.

(95) Bad

“A new protocol, termed FGS (Flooding Gateway Selection) protocol, between acluster head and its gateways to realize SGF is presented.”

(96) Good

A new protocol, termed the Flooding Gateway Selection (FGS) protocol, is presentedbetween a cluster head and its gateways to realize SGF.

Relevant Plain English Rules : 6, 5, 4The following are portions of poor sentences that illustrate the passive problems, and how to correctthem.

(97) Bad

a. “...was expressed...” (...time and cost was expressed as a ...function...)

b. “...was derived...” (...function was derived that a ... problem based on MTR was NP-hard.)

c. “...was given as...” (...method was given as a non-linear programming...)

In the examples above, essentially, we have the form “B was VERB/PAST TENSE A”. In otherwords, “B was expressed as A”, “B was derived from A”, “B was given as A...”, etc. It would bebetter to change these to active constructions in all cases, as in “A produces/gives/becomes (or,simply, “is”) B”.

(98) Good

a. ...is... (...time and cost is a ...function...)

b. ...is... (...function is based on a NP-hard MTR...)

c. ...is... (...non-linear programming is the method...)

Relevant Plain English Rules : 5, 6, 4

The following example involves the misuse of the word “able”, similar to the misuse of“how to”, something we will return to and consider from other viewpoints (principles of PlainEnglish) in other sections of this handbook. Here we look the problem from the point of view ofword order to the simple active voice.

(99) Bad

“The range blocks are also able to be classified into several classes for encoding indifferent manners.”

Not all problems with the passives are true passives. Here, we see a passive-looking structure,which is much wordier than the preferred alternative.

(100) Good

The range blocks can be classified into several classes for encoding in differentmanners.

Relevant Plain English Rules : 6, 76The next example is a further illustration of the problem with “able” and passive-like constructions.

(101) Bad

“By using this merging scheme, range blocks of various shapes as well as of varioussizes, which are called range “regions” more appropriately rather than range “blocks”,are able to be obtained.”

This case, as in the last, involves a difficulty in using “able” correctly. Usually, as shown in boththis and the last example, shorter alternative expressions can replace any of these constructedphrases using “able” as their base component.

(102) Good

By using this merging scheme, we can obtain range blocks of various sizes and shapes,called range “regions”.

1Relevant Plain English Rules : 32, 56, 37, 5, 6We see yet another problem with “able”.

(103) Bad

“Range blocks of not only various sizes but also various shapes, which are called range“regions” more appropriately, are able to be obtained by using region segmentationtechniques.”

This example contains several problems, including the use of “not only ... but also”, but here we useit to illustrate the “able” problem further.

(104) Good

Range blocks of various sizes and shapes, which are appropriately called range“regions”, can be obtained by using region segmentation techniques.

Relevant Plain English Rules : 57, 6, 42, 15

We now turn to another common problem that occurs at the beginning of sentences,where we see expressions such as “it is confirmed (considered, found, assumed, and so forth)”. Theuse of such expressions render the sentence order awkward, and like the true passives above, shouldbe repaired in favor of a more straightforward active structure.

(105) Bad

a. “It is confirmed that according to changes in the switch status pattern as shown inTable 2, the proposed universal biquad filter can certainly realize all filter types of a 2nd

order function.”

b. “Therefore it is confirmed that the cutoff (center) frequency of the proposed filter iseasily timed by the bias current.”

This is another problem with a passive appearance resulting from using a pronoun as a sentencesubject, followed by a verb (as in “it is confirmed”) and then followed by an explanation of the realsubject. Of course, the real subject should be placed first. In the first example, what was confirmedis placed in subject position, and in the second example, who did the confirming was placed insubject position.

(106) Good

a. The proposed universal biquad filter can realize all filter types of a 2nd order functionaccording to changes in the switch status pattern is confirmed, as shown in Table 2.

b. We confirmed that the cut-off (center) frequency of the proposed filter is easily timedby the bias current.

Relevant Plain English Rules : 5, 6, 57Let us look at a similar example, using a different verb.

(107) Bad

“It is found that the proportional gain [...] changes in the transient state, and convergeson [...] in the steady state.”

Our repair is the same as when we inserted the subject “we” in some of the passive examples above.

(108) Good

We found that the proportional gain [...] changes in the transient state, and converges on[...] in the steady state.

Relevant Plain English Rules : 6, 5, 4Next, we see a similar misuse of “it is found”, but offer an alternative method for correcting theproblem.

(109) Bad

“In Table 3, it is found that the optimal checkpoint interval increases except for thecolumn of Ozbaykal approximations [...].”

In this example, we made our repair by omitting the “it is found” expression (rather than inserting asubject such as “we”), and turning the example into a direct statement, which by implication ofcourse means that the authors found these points to be true. This is a much more direct, andeconomical solution.

(110) Good

Table 3 shows that the optimal checkpoint interval increases except for in the column ofOzbaykal approximations [...].

Relevant Plain English Rules : 4, 6, 77, 27

Here is another similar pair of examples, where we adopt the more direct approach.

(111) Bad

“In Fig. 3, it is found that the control responses are not good due to the effect of themutual interactions and nonlinearities.”

(112) Good

Figure 3 shows that the control responses are not satisfactory due to the effect of themutual interactions and non-linearities (of the scheme (?)).

Relevant Plain English Rules : 6, 5, 4, 57, 33, 34The following pair illustrates this same situation, involving yet a different verb (“note”), and againemploying the direct solution of deleting the words that refer to the actual noting, finding orconsidering of the information, all of which are obvious from context.

(113) Bad

“It is noted that this lossless integrator can be only used in a feedback loop due to properbias setting.”

(114) Good

This lossless integrator can only be used in a feedback loop because of the proper biassetting.

Relevant Plain English Rules : 6, 5, 57

We see similar problems where the verb is used passively, rendering the sentenceunacceptable. As in the last example, the poor statements are unnecessarily wordy and/or indirect.

(115) Bad

“[...] the right sons are definitely not included in the searched range, therefore, the rightsons are not needed to be visited.”

The repair here involved simply a verb choice, changing “are” to “do”, and a trimming of a fewwords (“the right sons”, rather than being repeated, are replaced with “they”).

(116) Good

...the right sons are definitely not included in the searched range, therefore, they do notneed to be visited.

Relevant Plain English Rules : 37, 5, 6The following is another example of having no real subject at the head of the sentence, compoundedby a poor verb choice.

(117) Bad

“It has been proven that the proposal noise reduction technique is available under thepractical environment.”

Here, the problem of word order is avoided, with the passive at the beginning of the sentence, butstill, excessive wordiness remains. Additionally, the form of the “proposal” has been changed”proposed”.

(118) Good

We have demonstrated that the proposed noise reduction technique is viable in thenormal environment.

Relevant Plain English Rules : 6, 5, 37, 34, 9

We see the problems of passives, and passive-like constructions in other areas as well. These problem areas also are involved with wordiness and articles, in particular, so we will seeoverlaps in such areas of misuse. In general, as stated above, the best solution is to try to avoidpassives in of favor actives, whenever possible.

3.1.d. Transitions

In this section we consider the problem of poor transitions from one sentence to another. Generally, two sentences can be combined into one, using appropriate linking devices, while atother times, separate sentences need to be linked better, while remaining separate, so that the ideasflow naturally from one statement to the next.

(119) Bad

“The basic idea for estimating the routing cost for 3-terminal nets is the same as for 2-terminal nets. Only the difference between the two cases is the number of indexes ofthe table.”

The second sentence in the bad example depends upon the first sentence, and as a result, should begrammatically joined to it, and/or separated with a clear transition element inserted; in many cases,both remedies are required.

(120) Good

The basic idea for estimating the routing cost for 3-terminal nets is the same as for 2-terminal nets, where the only difference between the two cases is the number of indexesof the table.

Relevant Plain English Rules : 11, 38, 59Next, we have another pair of sentences that should be joined together better by linking themtogether.

(121) Bad

“On the other hand, novel concepts for mobile communication have been considered. Ad-hoc networking [2] -- [5] is one of the concepts.”

This is another problem involving a clear dependency of the second sentence on the first, but noclear link between the two. In this case, we have joined the two sentences together, and added atransition word, “such”, to link the two. I should point out that the usual form of “Ad-hoc” isactually “ad hoc”, but this has not been altered in case it is a field-specific reference, with a specialmeaning or usage.

(122) Good

On the other hand, novel concepts for mobile communication, such as Ad-hocnetworking [2] -- [5], have been considered.

Relevant Plain English Rules :11, 23, 5We see a similar problem in the next example, but here, keep the sentences separate by addingappropriate linking words.

(123) Bad

“Therefore, the LPF limits the performance range of frequency-offset compensation. We will later derive the valid range.”

Here, too, the second sentence depends on the first, but has no obvious transition, or link. We havesuggested one possible solution below, where, in this case, we have maintained two distinctsentences, while providing a link between the two (“will thus seek”).

(124) Good

Therefore, the LPF limits the performance range of frequency-offset compensation. Wewill thus seek to derive the valid range.

Relevant Plain English Rules : 23, 16

Below we look at a different kind of problem with transitions. In this case, the authorhas made a statement, but has not suggested any motivation, or reasoning for it. This situationrequires an explanation, in order for the reader to make the appropriate transition from one set offacts to another.

(125) Bad

“For simplicity, the number of neighboring connections of each node is four in Fig. 1,but we assume eight neighborhoods in this paper.”

In the bad example, “but” is used, which suggests a contrary fact, or opposition, yet no explanationor further discussion is offered. In this situation, an appropriate explanation is required.

(126) Good

For simplicity, the number of neighboring connections of each node is four in Fig. 1, butwe assume eight neighborhoods in this paper since (explanation).

Relevant Plain English Rules : 16, 23

Poor transitions are often found at the beginnings of paragraphs as well. In particular,some paragraphs begin with no link to the preceding discussion, and often with no clearintroduction to what will be covered in the ensuing paragraph. A common example of such anopening statement is listed here.

(127) Bad

“Let Ti (i = 1,2,...) be the actual time interval between the (i-1)st and the i-thcheckpoints.”

In the bad example, there is obviously no link to any other statements made, rather, this is simplythe beginning of a mathematical statement. Before the reader sees this, the author should make anappropriate transition from the last point to the next. Below, though perhaps a more appropriatetransition can be developed, this should provide a basis for understanding and correcting theproblem.

(128) Good

Let us now consider the effect of actual time. Let Ti, (i = 1,2,...), be the actual timeinterval between the checkpoints (i-1)st and i-th.

Relevant Plain English Rules : 17, 16

3.1.e. Consistency

In this section, we look at the problem of lack of consistency. First we consider severalexamples of tense, where the tense is mixed within single statements. Next, we look at number,such as the relationship between subject number, and the verb's suffix, where there aredisagreements. We then look at parallel constructions, where several items are included as a list,but vary in form or type, and next we look at problems with abbreviations, where some authors havecoined their own unfortunate abbreviations. Further, we look at inconsistent usage of punctuation,particular in using (or not using) commas appropriately. Finally, we consider forms ofargumentative support, in using facts, while controlling opinions.

3.1.e.i. Tense

As noted above, tense is often misused, frequently by mixing two or more tensestogether in the same statement or paragraph, something we would generally want to avoid. Othertimes, errors are simply due to incorrect tense choices, or a mismatch between subject number andtense number. We will consider various problems of tense misuse below.

(129) Bad

“There are several attempts to generate chaotic binary sequences by using one-dimensional maps.”

Clearly, in order for “attempts” to have been made, they have to have been made in the past,therefore, an appropriate form of the past tense should be used.

(130) Good

Recently, there have been several attempts to generate chaotic binary sequences byusing one-dimensional maps.

Relevant Plain English Rules : 34, 76, 28The following bad example actually contains many problems, most of which have been correctedhere (note the much shorter correct version).

(131) Bad

“It has turned out so far that for some special orders, computing discrete logarithmsover the elliptic-curve groups of those orders are no longer hard, or become easier thanexpected.”

In terms of tense, the phrase “has turned out so far” is awkward and unnecessary. We also have theword “computing” matched with “are”, but of course this would be a singular reference, so “is” isrequired here. Finally, again, “computing” is used with “become”, but as a singular reference,“becomes” is necessary.

(132) Good

For some special orders, computing discrete logarithms over the elliptic-curve groups ofthose orders is no longer hard, or becomes easier than expected.

Relevant Plain English Rules : 57, 27, 29, 76

In the next example set, we see where it is important to maintain tense consistencythroughout the discussion of a single event.

(133) Bad

“In [6], another merging scheme where merging was applied to surrounding blocks in apredetermined order was proposed. In these merging schemes, the restriction on thelocations of range regions is removed. However, the variety of region shapes is stillsomewhat restricted.”

In this example, the tense (past) is established for the event by the first use of “was” above. Oncetense is established, it should generally be consistently maintained throughout the description of theevent (unless it brings us directly to the present, where the last statement may in fact be in thepresent tense).

(134) Good

In [6], another merging scheme where merging was applied to surrounding blocks in apredetermined order was proposed. In these merging schemes, the restriction on thelocations of range regions was removed. However, the variety of region shapes was stillsomewhat restricted.

Relevant Plain English Rules : 29, 76The next example has both the present tense and the infinitive mixed together.

(135) Bad

“Thus, we concentrate our attention to solve the nonlinear equation [...].”

This is primarily a misuse of the phrasal verb “concentrate on”, where the result of replacing “on”with “to” creates the infinitival form of the verb “solve”. When using this verb in the contextpresented here, we need to change “solve” to “solving”, since it implies focused effort for aperiod of time.

(136) Good

Thus, we concentrate our attention on solving the non-linear equation [...].

Relevant Plain English Rules : 29, 28, 4, 6Next, we have another example of mixed tenses.

(137) Bad

“The information theoretic measure has been shown to be useful to evaluate theperformance of the attack as well as to show deviations in certain attacks are of no useto derive secret information.”

The first and most obvious problem in the bad example has to do with the inclusion of theunnecessary passive structure “has been shown to be useful”, but is further compounded by aproblem similar to the one noted above for “concentrating on”. Here, when “use” is employed toindicate application, “in deriving” is preferred over the infinitive “to derive”, to order make tensesconsistent.

(138) Good

The information theoretic measure can be used to evaluate the performance of the attackas well as to show that deviations in certain attacks are of no use in deriving secretinformation.

Relevant Plain English Rules : 29, 28, 4, 6The following demonstrates another misuse of the infinitive.

(139) Bad

“The following example shows how we can avoid to deal with the combinatorialnumber of transition bindings.”

This is another example where the progressive form, is preferred over the infinitive form of theverb, in describing how something applies in a particular situation.

(140) Good

The following example shows how we can avoid dealing with the combinatorial numberof transition bindings.

Relevant Plain English Rules : 28, 76Next we see “have” and “has” used interchangeably (and thus, incorrectly).

(141) Bad

“Infinite-sort PN2’s can have infinitely many states, and has the same modeling poweras Turing machines [...].”

This is a simple problem of having two different kinds of verb endings to describe parts of the sameevent; they should agree in form.

(142) Good

Infinite-sort PN2’s can have infinitely many states, and have the same modelling poweras Turing machines [...].

Relevant Plain English Rules : 27, 76The following example has two different forms of the past tense used, incorrectly.

(143) Bad

“Recently, many types of neural networks [1] are proposed and have been employed inthe various fields.

This is another statement that contains mixed tense references to describe the same basic event. Again, we want to maintain a consistency of tense usage to describe all aspects of the same event.

(144) Good

Recently, many types of neural networks have been proposed and employed in variousfields.

Relevant Plain English Rules : 29, 17, 23, 16

3.1.e. ii. Number

Number refers to subject and verb number alignment, for the most part. So, theproblems we see here involve mismatches of subject number and the verb endings that should agreewith the subject. Often the real problem is that the subject itself is pluralized when it can only be inthe singular form (such as non-count mass nouns). Let us consider some problems involvingnumber misuse below.

(145) Bad

“In this section, we assume that every elements in diffusion layer belong to GF(2n).”

In this example, “every” require a singular subject, such as “every person” (not “every people”), so“elements” should be in the singular form, or “all” used with the plural form.

(146) Good

a. In this section, we assume that every element in the diffusion layer belongs to GF(2n).

(or)

b. In this section, we assume that all elements in the diffusion layer belong to GF(2n).

Relevant Plain English Rules : 76, 27, 15Note the following similar example.

(147) Bad

“We describe every transformations as follows.”

Here, “transformations” should be singular, or “all” used with the plural form.

(148) Good

a. We describe every transformation as follows.

(or)

b. We describe all transformations as follows.

Relevant Plain English Rules : 27, 76This next example involves a problem of inconsistent use of singular and plural forms.

(149) Bad

“In the current implementation, for each stage, the start temperatures and the endtemperature are specified in advance.”

Note that in the bad example, “temperature” in one case is singular, but in the other, plural. Theyboth should be the same, and in a general statement such as this, they both should be plural.

(150) Good

In the current implementation, for each stage, the start temperatures and the endtemperatures are specified in advance.

Relevant Plain English Rules : 27, 76Please note the poor use of tense in the following example.

(151) Bad

“Equation (7) means that every input error sequence with weight 2 produces error eventlonger than t x Fp at one of the component encoder at least.”

In this example, “event” should be in the plural, since these are repeated activities. Also, “at least”should precede the phrase it modifies, otherwise, it can modify the entire expression.

(152) Good

Equation (7) means that every input error sequence with weight 2 produces error eventslonger than t x Fp at least at one of the component encoders.

Relevant Plain English Rules : 76, 15

Regarding number, certain words seem to be misused more than others in the writing oftechnical and scientific papers. In particular, we see many problems with “research”, and “results”.We look at the latter case here, observing two examples, having considered “research” elsewhere.

(153) Bad

“The result of the test is summarized in Table 1. From the result, we can see that thescores of the proposed method are higher than BBS method.”

In this example, we see a common mistake, where “result” is written in the singular form, wherealmost always it should be written in the plural, when speaking of the outcome of an experiment. Also, note we have added the article, “the”, before the acronym “BBS” since it represents a specificnoun.

(154) Good

The results of the test are summarized in Table 1. From the results, we can see that the

scores of the proposed method are higher than the BBS method.

Relevant Plain English Rules : 76, 15

(155) Bad

“Here, the control results without the modeling error compensatory is shown in Fig. 3,where the user-specified parameters were set as follows: [...].”

With “results” in the plural, then naturally the verb must agree with this, so “is” needs to be changedto “are” in this set of examples.

(156) Good

Here, the control results without the modelling error compensatory are shown in Fig. 3,where the user-specified parameters were set as follows: [...].

Relevant Plain English Rules: 27

Turning our attention to number problems involving other nouns, let us now review theuse of “transition”.

(157) Bad

“Relabeling of transitions in the lower level nets if more than one transitions have thesame label [...].”

In this example, “transitions” when used with “one” is of course incorrect; there can only be one“transition”. The phrase “more than” does not change the noun form in this situation.

(158) Good

Re-labeling of transitions in the lower level nets if more than one transition has thesame label [...].

Relevant Plain English Rules : 27, 76

A pair of words many people have difficulty with in terms of number is “seem” and“seems”.

(159) Bad

“[...] the decreasing properties on the parameters above seems to be natural.”

In this case, “the decreasing properties” are the nominal subject, so since they are plural(“properties”), “seem” rather than “seems” is required.

(160) Good

[...] the decreasing properties on the parameters above seem natural.

Relevant Plain English Rules : 27, 76, 37, 4, 6

Sometimes the problem with number agreement arises from having subjects that aremixed in number to begin with.

(161) Bad

“Nowadays, computer and communications are inevitably connected to each other.”

Unless we are talking about a single computer, we are in fact making a generalization, whichusually requires plural subjects, so in this case, “computer” should be “computers”. Further, sinceboth “computers” and “communications” are plural, the device “each other”, which refers to twosingular items, cannot be used. Note that the replacement still appears to have a singular reference,but these terms can be used to refer to groups of items, where “each” in the bad sentence has aparticularly singular connotation.

(162) Good

Recently, computers and communications have become closely connected to oneanother.

Relevant Plain English Rules : 27, 76, 17, 15

Here is another common error involving subject number and tense agreement, where thewriter wants to indicate a numerical limit.

(163) Bad

“If there is only one or less Y block that has the DCT coefficients in a macro block, thecheck marker is not embedded into the macro block.”

The problem here involves how to handle “only one or less Y block”. Using this phrasing, wewould need to write “blocks” (in the plural), since “less” involves multiple possibilities, but “lessthan one” in this case is zero, so we need another solution. We can repair this by breaking up theinclusive expression (“only one or less Y block”) into two more manageable pieces, as in thefollowing.

(164) Good

If there is just one Y block that has the DCT coefficients in a macro block, or none atall, the check marker is not embedded into the macro block.

Relevant Plain English Rules: 76This is another problem involving the need to set a numerical limit, and the resulting confusion innumber agreement.

(165) Bad

“For the remaining more than 3-terminal nets, the accuracy of routing cost estimationwould be degraded compared to the case of 2- or 3-terminal nets.”

This is a rather unique problem involving how to indicate an amount “more than” a set limit. In thebad example, clearly the reference is to a number of at least 4, or more, terminal sets. So, we needto indicate this clearly.

(166) Good

For the remaining 4- (or more) terminal nets, the accuracy of routing cost estimationwould be degraded compared to the case of 2- or 3-terminal nets.

Relevant Plain English Rules : 27, 76, 37

The next example is fairly complex, involving the wrong article, the passive, and numberdisagreement.

(167) Bad

“In order to confirm the validity of the derived performance bound, the simulation ofiterative decoding based on BCJR algorithm have been executed.”

While maintaining the passive structure, a few problems still need to be corrected here. First, “the”should be changed to “a” since the simulation was not specifically identified, and second, “havebeen” was change to “was” since “simulation” is what the verb should agree with, and it is singular.

(168) Good

In order to confirm the validity of the derived performance bound, a simulation ofiterative decoding based on the BCJR algorithm was executed.

Relevant Plain English Rules : 27, 76, 15

The word “each” and the phrase “each other” often causes problems for writers inhandling number agreement.

(169) Bad

“Flexible segmentation of complicated natural scene images is achieved by usingresistive-fuse networks, and each segmented regions is extracted by nonlinear oscillatornetworks.”

This is a very simple example involving the use of “each”. Here, “each” refers to a singular item, so“region” the noun it modifies, should be singular.

(170) Good

Flexible segmentation of complicated natural scene images is achieved by usingresistive-fuse networks, and each segmented region is extracted by non-linear oscillatornetworks.

Relevant Plain English Rules: 76

Acronyms, discussed more thoroughly below, are often misunderstood with regards tonumber, as we see in this next example.

(171) Bad

“[...] EOS do not allow to have infinitely many states.”

Often times, the number of acronyms are not clear. In general, despite what they once referred to, asan acronym, they become singular nouns, and must be used accordingly in subject-verb agreementsituations. I have also suggested an improvement on “infinitely many states”.

(172) Good

[...] EOS does not allow infinitely many states (an infinite number of states).

Relevant Plain English Rules : 31, 27, 37

3.1.e.iii. Parallel structures

Parallel structures are repeated structures that usually appear in the form of a list, butmay also appear in a series of phrases, clauses or sentences. In these series of expressions, we wantto have each item in the series conform as closely as possible in structure to all the othercomponents. So, we will want to try to make the verb forms all the same when relevant, as well assubject or object number, word types (such as adjective, adverbs, nouns, etc.) and even prepositiontype. In other words, each item on the list should be made consistently, and each should look, inform, like all the others.

We will begin with a few simple illustrations of problems in parallel constructions. Inour first example, we see where word types such as nouns and adjectives are mixed up in parallelstructures.

(173) Bad

“If the following syntax and semantic violations occur in the quantized DCT coefficients[...].”

In this case, “syntax” is a noun, while “semantic” is an adjective, yet they are both in a parallel listconstruction. To remedy this, we need to convert one to the other.

(174) Good

If the following syntactic and semantic violations occur in the quantized DCTcoefficients [...].

Relevant Plain English Rules: 9

In the next set of examples, we see problems with parallel constructions not at the wordlevel, but at the phrase level.

(175) Bad

“The distribution shown in the figure can be classified to 3 categories. Category 1: thiscategory mainly includes long routes. Category 2: the routes in this category are sosimple that little time is needed. Category 3: This category includes the routes onreally difficult patterns.”

It is easy to see the problems with the poor example. Two of the three categories contain sentencesstarting with “this category” while one starts with “the routes”; all three should follow the sameformat. However, we clearly do not need to even state the word “category”, as it is alreadymentioned in the main introductory statement. We can condense things, following the principles ofboth Directness and Economy, and put everything into parallel distribution, as in the good example.

(175) Good

The distribution shown in the figure can be divided into 3 categories: (1) those thatmainly include long routes; (2) those that are so simple that little time is needed, and; (3) those that are routes on really difficult patterns.

Relevant Plain English Rules : 8, 72, 77

Similarly, a list should follow a similar pattern of grammatical construction whether it is includedwithin a single sentence, or made up of several sentences.

(176) Bad

1) Check marker embedding:

A check marker is embedded into a macro block [...].

2) Error Addition:

One bit error with [an] error rate of [...].

3) Error detection performance:

We investigate how each condition [...].

4) PSNR calculation:

To investigate the influence of the check marker embedding [...].

In the above list, each explanation (the line under the numbered heading) should be of the same type(see the italicized portions). The first two are of the form of a list with the noun subject as a head,the third has the focus noun placed after the verb, and the forth has an infinitival verb. What wewant, however, is all four items to follow the same general pattern, as is suggested in the following.

(177) Good

Check marker embedding:

Check marker embedded into a macro block [...].

Error Addition:

One bit error with [an] error rate of [...].

Error detection performance:

Conditions’ contributions to error detection.

PSNR calculation:

Check marker influence on picture quality [...].

Relevant Plain English Rules : 8, 37

This next example is representative of the kinds of problems involved when parallelstructures are embedded in dense or complex text.

(178) Bad

“When the failure mechanism for the database management under uncertainty isexamined, we should image more serious situations on failures such as the increasingfailure rate circumstance or catastrophic failure from the standpoint of the fault-

tolerant, and should model the database system under more complex and generalsituations in terms of system failure.”

This poor example is a single very complex sentence. We can repair this by breaking it up into twoshorter statements, thereby focusing on two important points that are parallel; “increasing failurerate” and “catastrophic failure”. This solution still is not perfect, but it suggests the appropriatedirection to take. Though perhaps other errors exist, we wish to concentrate our attention on thebasic idea of breaking up the sentence, while maintaining a parallel structure, so some problems areleft unchanged.

(179) Good

When the failure mechanism for the database management under uncertainty isexamined, we should image more serious situations on failures. We should investigatethe increasing failure rate circumstance or catastrophic failure from the standpoint ofthe fault-tolerant, and should model the database system under more complex andgeneral situations in terms of system failure.

Relevant Plain English Rules : 37, 66, 67, 54

3.1.e.iv. Abbreviations

The key to proper abbreviation use is acceptability. In other words, abbreviations can beused if they are accepted industry standards, but should not be coined just to fit the purposes of yourparticular paper. Further, even if they are accepted, they must be clearly decipherable. The readermust be able to look at the abbreviation, and immediately understand what it represents. Finally, itmust make sense from a utilitarian point of view. Abbreviations are meant to save time, not causedelays, and are meant to save space. Usually, an abbreviation that saves only a character space ortwo should be avoided (such as “sect.” for “section”, as we noted above, in our discussion of theintroduction). There should be elegance in the economy, not ugliness. As a general rule, avoidabbreviations unless they truly are widespread. You can apply a simple test to see if anyabbreviation is appropriate. First, is the word it represents used frequently enough in the text towarrant a shortened, telegraphic form? Second, is the abbreviation decipherable (clearly understoodfor what it represents)? Third, is the savings of character spaces significant?

Let us consider the problems with abbreviations concerning the word “section” firstdiscussed in the section on introductions.

(180) Bad

“The rest of the paper is organized as follows. In Sect. 2 we present some preliminarydefinitions. In Sect. 3 we give a real-time algorithm for the k-shading problem onpartial h-trees. Finally, we conclude our result in Sect. 4 with some comments on adelayed time algorithm.”

The word “section” is used probably less than ten times in the entire paper, so it does not meet thetest of high frequency usage, which most abbreviations should pass. Also, there is a net savings ofonly two character spaces between “Sect.” and “Section”, which fails the test of noticeable savingsin character spaces. For these reasons, and for the other stylistic reason that abbreviations areunattractive and distracting, they should generally be avoided.

(181) Good

The remainder of the paper is organized as follows. In Section 2 we present some

preliminary definitions. In Section 3 we give a real time-time algorithm for the k-shading problem on partial h-trees. Finally, we conclude in Section 4 with somecomments on a delayed time algorithm.

Relevant Plain English Rules : 31, 57

The next example we consider here is the abbreviation “resp” used in the following poorexample. What does this stand for? It could stand for “with respect to”, “represented as”,“respectively” or? Certainly from context it is unclear, so it should be avoided, since it fails the“decipherable” test, to the lay reader, but may be acceptable within the scientific context in which itwas used. As part of English syntax, it is confusing. As part of a mathematical expression, it maybe acceptable.

(182) Bad

“On the other hand, if given the trapdoor for f (resp. f-1) it is hard to compute thetrapdoor for f-1 (resp. f) respectively, these call such an f separated trapdoor no-wayfunctions.”

We have replaced the distraction abbreviation “resp.” with “in relation to” but this may not becorrect?the point is, some lexical change is required.

(183) Better

On the other hand, if given the trapdoor for f (in relation to f-1) it is hard to compute thetrapdoor for f-1 (in relation to f), and vice versa. As a result these f separated trapdoorsare called no-way functions.

Relevant Plain English Rules : 31, 37

3.1.f. Capitalization and Punctuation

Here we look at a few examples where capitalization and punctuation, or lack of it,causes problems with our understanding of the text.

The first example is a simple one of incorrect capitalization, where the first word in theparenthetical is capitalized, where it should not be, since it is still part of the first sentence.

(184) Bad

“The most important part of this construction is the transition from pi and rn to ps

(Occurring of this transition are possible only when both nets in pi and rn are identical).”

Notice that repairs have also been made to how the verb “occur” is used.

(185) Good

The most important part of this construction is the transition from pi and rn to ps (thistransition occurs only when both nets in piand rn are identical).

Relevant Plain English Rules: 37

In this next example, we see how important the placement of a single comma is.

(186) Bad

“Moreover, for each path edges consist of deleted loops correspond to the externallyactive edges for the corresponding spanning tree.”

In the poor example, the reader must decide whether the noun is simple, as in “path”, or complex, asin “path edges”, or, whether “path” and “edges” are two separate things, or part of one whole. Byplacing a single comma, we can see that “paths” and “edges” are separate.

(187) Good

Moreover, for each path, edges consist of deleted loops corresponding to the externallyactive edges for the corresponding spanning tree.

Relevant Plain English Rules: 76

The next pair of examples also suffer from run-ons of meaning, where it is difficult totell where one noun phrase stops and the other starts. Commas again correct this problem.

(188) Bad

“This kind of binary sequences based on chaos orbits are called the chaotic binarysequence.”

Here, it is particularly difficult to tell whether there is a phrase “based on chaos”, or “based on chaosorbits”; the commas help us to clearly see which it is.

(189) Good

These kinds of binary sequences, based on chaos orbits, are called chaotic binarysequences.

Relevant Plain English Rules : 27, 76, 15

3.1.g. Argument Support: Facts and opinions

In terms of Plain English, we want to be very careful about maintaining a neutralperspective, even when discussing our own findings, in a research paper. We want to avoidinterjecting our own opinions, or bias, and allow the reader to judge the merits of our argumentsfairly and without prejudice. Similarly, we want to avoid showing undue bias (positive or negative)towards the work and ideas of other people; rather, we simply should rely on the strength of ourargumentative analysis to provide convincing evidence for one point of view or another.

In this first example, the use of extreme words such as “malicious” is distracting.

(190) Bad

“Moreover, the malicious subscribers might try to expose the secret decryption keysburied in their decryption boxes [...].”

The remedy in this situation is to find a more neutral description that conveys the intendedmeaning. Two suggestions are offered.

(191) Good

Moreover, the unlicensed (or illegitimate) subscribers might try to expose the secretdecryption keys buried in their decryption boxes [...].

Relevant Plain English Rules : 33, 34The next example contains another example of the kind of biased language that we want to avoid.

(192) Bad

“Our experimental protocol is highly conservative, we don’t feel it appropriate to useunknown and untested ideas in the framework of a new encryption schema.”

The use of “highly conservative” suggests a value judgment which is out of place in a neutralcontext such as a scientific or technical report. Also, the phrase “we don't feel appropriate to useunknown or untested ideas” has a nuance of a superior talking down to inferiors, which is againsomething we want to avoid.

(193) Good

Our experimental protocol prevents us from using unknown and untested ideas in theframework of a new encryption schema.

(or)

Our experimental protocol requires us to use known and tested ideas in the frameworkof a new encryption schema.

Relevant Plain English Rules : 70, 20, 57

3.2. Economy

The Principle of Economy contains four guidelines. These guidelines include: (a) Brief isbest; (b) High frequency words are preferred over low frequency "specialty" words; (c) Avoidsubordination, and; (d) Discuss one point per statement. The most frequent violation of theseprinciples involves repetition, wordiness and redundancy; all of which are discussed below. Inaddition, in this section we also look at the misuse of conjunctions.

3.2.a. Repetition

Repetition generally involves the repeating of same or similar words and phrasesthroughout the text to the point of distraction. Repetition of terms signals to the reader that theauthor's vocabulary is limited, and at the same time makes for very tedious, boring reading. Ofcourse, we want to eliminate as much obvious repetition as possible.

Most examples of repetition occur within the larger domain of a paragraph, section oreven the entire paper. So, in order to see exactly what is meant by repetition, let us look at severalexamples taken from a single paper.

(194) Bad

a. In this paper, to avoid an increase in white noise transmission rates [...].

b. This paper is organized as follows [...].

c. In this paper, we consider the VTS technique [...].

d. In this paper, we focus on methods of transmitting [...].

e. In this paper, we set the signals on [...].

f. In this paper, we use the formula [...].

(and so forth -- there were many more!)

The problem here is the repetition of the phrase “(in) this paper”. Such repetition, whether it is of asingle word, or a phrase such as this, is quite distracting, and eventually can be an impediment to thereader. Overuse of common terms, or uncommon ones, suggest a limited vocabulary on the onehand, and serves to make the text monotonous and dull on the other hand. Let us see how we canimprove on this situation.

(195) Good

a. To avoid an increase in white noise transmission [...].

b. This paper is organized as follows [...].

c. Next, we consider the VTS technique [...].

d. In this section we focus on methods of transmitting [...].

e. We set the signals on [...].

f. We propose using the formula [...].

Relevant Plain English Rules : 32, 56By using alternative expressions for repeated words, we still leave the opportunity to use theoriginally over-used expression where necessary (“in this paper”), such as done partially in (195.b)and (195.d), without offending or distracting the reader.

Below, we see another very similar example of repetition of phrases which intrude on an otherwisegenerally well-written paper. All examples are taken from a single paper.

(196) Bad

a. “In this paper, to avoid weight transmission using side [...].”

b. “This paper is organized as follows.”

c. “Finally, the conclusion of this paper is given in Sect. 5.”

d. “In this paper, we consider the PTS technique [...].”

e. “In this section, we focus on methods of transmitting [...].”

f. “In this paper, we set the pilot signals on edge [...].”

g. “In this paper, we use p = 3, [...].”

h. “In this paper, we compare the performance [...].”

i. “In this subsection, the performance [...].”

j. “[...] in this section, we can confirm [...].”

k. “In this paper, we have proposed [...].”

There is a clear repetition of the phrase “this paper (or section...)” that occurs so often that it isdistracting. Note that the whole phrase is overworked, so even if “paper” is replaced with “section”or “subsection” a few times, it still has the same net effect of being repetitive and distracting. Thereare two ways to solve this problem. One is to simply acknowledge the fact that all statements youmake generally relate to “this paper” and thus, “this paper” is understood, or implied (and thus canbe omitted). The only time when there is a question is when you are discussing another person’spaper, where it is important to make it clear that it is your ideas that you are referring to, not thoseof someone else. So, in all those cases above that include “we” (seven of the examples), we couldsimply omit “in this paper” and begin with “we” (as in “we compare the performance...”). Theother solution is simply to expand the vocabulary base by choosing appropriate synonymous wordsand expressions, such as “here”, “below”, “next” and so forth. Of course, one or two uses of theexpression, “in this paper”, is fine.

(197) Good

a. To avoid weight transmission using side [...].

b. This paper is organized as follows.

c. Finally, our conclusions are offered in Sect. 5.

d. Next, we consider the PTS technique [...].

e. In this section, we focus on methods of transmitting [...].

f. We set the pilot signals on edge [...].

g. Throughout, we use p = 3, [...].

h. We now compare the performance [...].

i. Here, let us consider the performance [...].

j. [...] we can thus confirm [...].

k. Above, we have proposed [...].

Relevant Plain English Rules : 32, 56

Next, we observe a few examples where the repetition occurs within the domain of asingle paragraph. In this next example, we have several sentences that repeat the same word so

much that it is very distracting.

(198) Bad

“This formula is derived by assuming the following: It is assumed that the service areaconsists of regular hexagonal cells and traffic intensity of each cell is the same. p-beltbuffering systems are assumed and it is also assumed that each cell has the samenumber of interference cells. This assumption means that we can neglect the edgeeffect. Furthermore, it is assumed that terminals never move.”

Keeping in mind that we want to avoid repetition of words (it is distracting, and suggests that thewriter has a limited vocabulary), what can we do to solve this problem? There are usually twoalternatives in this situation. The first is to use the key word once, and place everything else in aparallel listing construction, or, an alternative is simply to use synonyms wherever possible. The listcan be written as shown first, or incorporated into a paragraph using numerals in parentheses andthe same list of statements, as shown second.

(199) Good (1)

This formula is derived by assuming the following four conditions:(1) The service area consists of regular hexagonal cells and traffic intensity of each cellis the same.(2) There are p-belt buffering systems.(3) Each cell has the same number of interference cells (edge effect can be neglected). (4) Terminals never move.

(199) Good (2)

This formula is derived by assuming the following four conditions: (1) The service areaconsists of regular hexagonal cells and traffic intensity of each cell is the same; (2)There are p-belt buffering systems; (3) Each cell has the same number of interferencecells (edge effect can be neglected), and; (4) Terminals never move.

Relevant Plain English Rules : 32, 56In this next example we see a similar problem, that of the same word repeated frequently, but due tothe structure it is used in, a different solution is required.

(200) Bad

“In this paper, we assume that BM in the system considering no hand-off operationswhere offered traffic is an is equivalent to BM in the system considering the mobilitywhere offered traffic is a. In other words, we consider offered traffic considering theinfluence of the mobility. Similarly, we assume that BH in the system considering nohand-off operations where offered traffic is ah is equivalent to BH in the systemconsidering the mobility where offered traffic is a.”

Clearly, we are not able to solve the problem of the overuse of “consider” by creating a listingstructure as we did with the last example. We are thus left with the alternative of using suitablesynonyms, and perhaps deleting one or two uses of “consider” altogether. Besides simply overusing“consider”, it was misused, as the meaning of this verb does not extend as far, I believe, as theauthors intended. As a result, my choices may not coincide with the author’s intentions, but shouldpoint in the direction of a preferred solution. In order to remain faithful to the original text, theitalics in this section were carried over as originally written, and do not refer to our highlighted

material.

(201) Good

In this paper, we assume that BM in the system implementing no hand-off operationswhere offered traffic is an is equivalent to BM in the system recognizing the mobilitywhere offered traffic is a. In other words, we determined that offered traffic involvesthe influence of the mobility. Similarly, we assume that BH in the system implementingno hand-off operations where offered traffic is ah is equivalent to BH in the systemrecognizing the mobility where offered traffic is a.

Relevant Plain English Rules : 32, 56

Let us now look at examples of repetition that occur across just two sentences.

(202) Bad

“To develop ad-hoc networks, we must overcome a lot of problems. These problemsinclude a lot of theoretical issues.”

The repeated phrase, “a lot of”, is distracting both because it is repeated, and it is vague; bothshould really be replaced. We will return to the “a lot” in a latter section of this handbook.

(203) Good

To develop ad-hoc networks, we must overcome a large number of problems thatinvolve many theoretical issues.

Relevant Plain English Rules : 32, 56, 34, 37

The following is another set of examples that show how intrusive repeated phrases are inadjoining sentences.

(204) Bad

“On the other hand, once given the power of computing [...]. On the other hand, if onecan access the oracle of computing [...].”

One key to handling repetition is simply to use alternative words and phrases to get the same ideaacross. Here, variety is preferred over consistency (monotony).

(205) Good

On the other hand, once given the power of computing [...]. Alternatively, if one canaccess the results of computing [...].

Relevant Plain English Rules : 32, 33, 34

The following set of examples contains repetition that stretches from the introductionover to the conclusion. While sometimes repetition is useful to highlight key points, it can bedistracting. Often, readers remember the introduction very well, which they read perhaps morecarefully than certain parts of the main body of the paper. It is also likely they may concentrateagain on the conclusions. So here, too, it is best not to simply repeat the same words, expressions orsentences even across these distances, since readers might remember.

(206) Bad

a. (from Introduction) “Generating state spaces is one of important and generalmethods in the analysis of Petri nets.”

b. (from Conclusion) “Generating state spaces is one of important and generalmethods in the analysis of Petri nets.”

As is obvious, the original statement in the introduction has been repeated verbatim in theconclusion. Most readers will notice this, and it is therefore distracting. It would be better to restatethe idea in different words.

(207) Good

a. Generating state spaces is one of the most important and general methods in theanalysis of Petri nets.

b. In this paper, we proposed an efficient algorithm for exploring the state spaces ofPetri nets with large capacities.

Relevant Plain English Rules : 32, 56, 15Here is a slightly different set of examples that repeat words across (with some distance between)sentences.

(208) Bad

a. “The reference signal w(t) is given by piecewise constant components.”

b. “One is the reason that w(t) is given by piecewise constants.”

In this example, the word “piecewise”, a very uncommon word, is repeated. Though manyparagraphs separate the two sentences, because it is so uncommon, it stands out, and when it isrepeated, it lowers the readability of the text. Such uncommon words should generally be avoidedaltogether, and certainly not repeated. By replacing “piecewise” with a common word, such as“separate”, it no longer stands out, and if only used twice, separated by many paragraphs, isprobably fine.

(209) Good

a. The reference signal w(t) is given by separate constant components.

b. One is the reason that w(t) is given by separate constants.

Relevant Plain English Rules: 32

3.2.b. Wordiness

Wordiness is a very common problem in most reports, and is one that can be correctedfairly easily, as long as the problem is recognized. Essentially, wordiness means that you have usedtoo many words to convey an idea, where another term or phrase, using fewer words, will get theidea across. Wordiness simply means we have to read more words to comprehend the message, soif we can convey the message in fewer words, we can improve the readability of the text. Oftentimes, wordiness tends to over-formalize statements, or to create unnecessary distance between the

writer and the reader--both unwelcome results that we want to try to avoid. Let us look at severalexamples of wordiness, and how we can improve on them.

(210) Bad

a. We assume that there does not exist the problem of image quality loss...

b. [...] accept the connections in other cases.

c. This paper devises a computational method which is more effective than that of thetraditional method, and moreover the proposed approach is compatible withconventional protocol.

In these last examples, involving wordiness, we see a common usage problem. In “a”, five wordsare replaced by three, in “b” three are replaced by one, and in “c” twenty words are replaced byfifteen. In all three examples, too many words are used to get otherwise simple ideas across, and inthe interest of both Economy and Directness, should be avoided.

(211) Good

a. We assume that there are no problems of image quality loss...

b. [...] accept the connections otherwise.

c. This paper introduces a computational method that is both more compatible withconventional protocol, and more effective than the traditional method.

Relevant Plain English Rules: 57

Combating wordiness is a primary goal in Plain English, which suggests “brief is best”(Economy), and whenever possible when there is an expression with fewer words that can replace alonger expression, then the one with fewer words is preferred.

(212) Bad

“In practice it is often considered to be sufficient to prevent from analyzing a decoder bysupplying subscribers with so-called secure hardware solutions, say smartcards.”

This is another problem using “it” in an awkward passive-like expression, similar to ones we saw inthe section on passives. Here, though, we will view this from a wordiness perspective, where thewhole expression, “it is often considered to be sufficient”, really adds nothing to the meaning of thesentence, and most of it can therefore be deleted.

(213) Good

In practice, supplying subscribers with so-called secure hardware solutions, such assmartcards, is often sufficient to prevent (unlicensed users?) from analyzing a decoder.

Relevant Plain English Rules : 6, 71, 72, 57, 40

As we have already seen, many words and phrases simply are not needed to get the basicintended message across.

(214) Bad

“From this result it can be seen that the improvement of 7.0dB in SNR has been obtained.”

This is an example where the italicized phrase adds nothing to the sentence, and as such, can bedeleted. We have repaired the passive structure here as well, since we also reduce wordiness bydoing so, and added an article to modify the singular acronym form, “SNR”.

(215) Good

Based on these results, we obtained an improvement of 7.0 dB in the SNR.

Relevant Plain English Rules : 57, 6, 5, 27Here is another pair of examples illustrating the addition of unnecessary words in getting the overallmessage across. The italicized phrase can be deleted, and the sentence can be arranged (note thatthere are passive problems here as well).

(216) Bad

“In [6], it is described that introducing the ad-hoc concept to cellular systems is effectiveon efficient usage of frequency bands as follows.”

In addition to the deletion of the unnecessary phrase, the citation has been moved to a positionfollowing the statement. By doing this, no direct reference, such as “in”, is required.

(217) Good

Introducing the ad-hoc concept to cellular systems is effective for efficient usage offrequency bands [6], as follows.

Relevant Plain English Rules : 5, 57, 6, 4

Often times, complex tense forms are used in favor of their simple alternatives, butusually, the simple solution is the best solution.

(218) Bad

“To conveniently execute the above-mentioned calculation, Viterbi et al. have alreadyproposed the method using a state transition matrix of the component code [12].”

In the poor example, above, there is no difference in basic meaning, based on context, between“have already proposed” (a past event) and simply “proposed” (a past event). In this case, then,following the principle of Economy, simple (brief) is best.

(219) Good

To conveniently execute the above-mentioned calculation, Viterbi et al. proposed usinga state transition matrix of the component code [12].

Relevant Plain English Rules : 57, 56

Here is another example where a single word is sufficient to get our idea across, and theadded extras convey nothing useful.

(220) Bad

“As a result, this concept has been applied to most of all land mobile communicationnetworks.”

Do the words “of all” change the meaning of “most”? If not (they don't), then they are notnecessary.

(221) Good

As a result, this concept has been applied to most land mobile communication networks.

Relevant Plain English Rules: 57

Some wordiness problems are quite simple to correct, particularly when it simplyrequires the removal of one or more unnecessary words.

(222) Bad

“By replacing steps A4) to A8) in Fig. 3 by B1) to B15) in Fig. 5, we obtain the entireimproved algorithm.”

Words such as “entire”, “complete”, and so forth, are rarely needed. The “improved algorithm” isone unit, one thing, so of course we are referring to it as a complete, or entire unit. This is likesaying, I am “completely finished”. If you are indeed completely finished, you are, in simpler terms,“finished”. It is a rather simple situation, you are either finished, or you aren't--“completely” addsno meaning to the expression in a technical or scientific report.

(223) Good

By replacing steps A4) to A8) in Fig. 3 by B1) to B15) in Fig. 5, we obtain the improvedalgorithm.

Relevant Plain English Rules: 57Here is another problem where modifying words add nothing to what we already know.

(224) Bad

“We have investigated the difficulty of the open question: Can we construct an ellipticcurve of a given order in deterministic polynomial time?”

Like “free gift” (have you ever heard of gift that was not free), and “completely finished, “openquestion” is a wordy way of saying “question”, since any unanswered question is presumably,“open”.

(225) Good

We have investigated the difficult question: Can we construct an elliptic curve of agiven order in deterministic polynomial time?

Relevant Plain English Rules : 33, 34, 57

In another example involving “open questions”, we see the same problem made worseby repetition, and further wordiness.

(226) Bad

“We have also given a necessary and efficient condition for the open question to besolved affirmatively under the ERH. This leads to another open question that isequivalent (under ERH) to the original open question: [...].”

First, of course we don't need “open” for any of three occurrences in the poor example, and in thesecond sentence, we can condense this statement into a much more economical structure.

(227) Good

We have also given a necessary and efficient condition for the question to be solvedaffirmatively under the ERH. This leads to a nearly identical (under the ERH) question:[...].

Relevant Plain English Rules : 57, 32

The following set of examples contains a pairing of words where one overlaps inmeaning with the other, and as such, is wordy.

(228) Bad

“Accordingly, there are a lot of speech enhancement techniques such as existentmethods utilizing the estimation theory [3].”

The meaning of the word “existent” is repetitive (redundant), since it implies “existing” or simply“is/are”. In other words, if we have a method, then it “exists”, so we don't need to call it an“existent method”. This is similar to points made about “open question”, “completely finished” and“free gifts”. Things that are repetitive are often redundant, and vice versa.

(229) Good

Accordingly, there are a lot of speech enhancement techniques such as methods utilizingthe estimation theory [3].

Relevant Plain English Rules: 56

The following example involves confusion caused by a similar case of wordiness.

(230) Bad

“We assume that there does not exist the minimum-cost tree of H whose root is u0.”

In this example, there are too many words used to get a basic idea across. Namely, “does not exist”is wordy and intrudes on the main message. Further, the negative is awkward and out of place aswell. The word “exist” is frequently used both in these negative statements and affirmatives aswell, but in both cases, the preferred alternative is simply “is”.

(231) Good

We assume that there is no minimum-cost tree of H whose root is u0.

Relevant Plain English Rules : 57, 42

No reference needs to be made to obvious information. Though at times we may use the

following expression, It is important to note that it adds very little to the actual meaning of thestatement.

(232) Bad

“Summarizing the above, our scheme is more efficient than the previous [schemes] [...].”

In this case, what else could you be summarizing, other than what was written “above”? In mostcases, just telling us that you are summarizing is sufficient; this is both direct and economical.

(233) Good

Summarizing, our scheme is more efficient than the previous [schemes] [...].

Relevant Plain English Rules: 57Let us view a similar example.

(234) Bad

“To summarize above a deterministic polynomial-time algorithm for computing theorder itself is known [...].”

In this last case, “above” is unnecessary, where adding a comma is all that is needed.

(235) Good

To summarize, a deterministic polynomial-time algorithm for computing the order itselfis known [...].

Relevant Plain English Rules: 57

Sometimes “above” isn't a bad thing. In the next example, the expression is used as amodifier, and while it could be replaced by “our”, it need not be. There are other wordinessproblems, however.

(236) Bad

“Summarizing the above arguments, when a structural network of at most 50 ~ 60vertices and 150 ~ 180 edges is of practical interest to investigate, the problem is neverhard to solve and can be handled within a practical time.”

Here, the italicized phrases are wordy, and be replaced by more economical alternatives.

(237) Good

Summarizing the above arguments, when a structural network of at most 50 ~ 60vertices and 150 ~ 180 edges is worth investigating, the problem can be solved quicklyand easily.

Relevant Plain English Rules : 57, 33This is another awkward reference to previously discussed information, where the use of “above”would offer a reasonable solution.

(238) Bad

“First, sort the so far observed contexts, [equation] in order of [...].”

Our simple repair here is to replace the awkward phrase, “so far observed”, with the lest wordy, andmore precise, “noted above”.

(239) Good

First, sort the contexts noted above, [equation] in order of [...].

Relevant Plain English Rules : 37, 57Here are three more examples of problems with “above”. In two of the three cases, we have taken“above” out, and in the third, have reworded the sentence.

(240) Bad

a. “Next, based on the above fact [...].”

b. “To estimate the rate function for the above methods [...].”

c. “However, because of the above mentioned differences [...].”

In the first poor example, “a”, we can simply use “this” to follow a previously stated point. In thesecond example, we use “previous”, and in the third, we change the word order.

(241) Good

a. Next, based on this fact [...].

b. To estimate the rate function for the methods discussed in the previous section [...].

c. However, because of the differences mentioned above [...].

Relevant Plain English Rules : 32, 34, 38, 57

Wordiness sometimes comes about when explanations are offered when they really aren'tnecessary, as in the following example.

(242) Bad

“Otherwise, that is to say, if the range region contains more than one primitive blocks, a1-bit is assigned, and then, the following process is applied.”

The sentence begins with “otherwise”, then follows this by another expression which plays a similarfunction (“that is to say”). In this situation, only one such expression is necessary. We have alsorepaired the number-reference problem (“more than one”) where it is difficult to make subject andtense agree in number.

(243) Good

Otherwise, if the range region contains two or more primitive blocks, a 1-bit is assigned,and then, the following process is applied.

Relevant Plain English Rules : 57, 27

Here is another example that shows how to eliminate unnecessary words, therebyfocusing more directly on the message.

(244) Bad

“Thus this paper devises an error detection on the basis of the third way, which is moreeffective than that of the conventional method, and moreover the proposed approach iscompatible with the conventional decoder.”

First, there are several problems that must be addressed before even beginning to shorten thesentence. The verb “devises” in inappropriate (a paper doesn’t “devise” anything, people do); it canprobably be replaced with something like “introduces”. Next, “the third way” needs to be restatedexplicitly here--it is a key point. With these points in mind, let us now see if we can reorder theideas to shorten and clarify the message. Essentially, our repairs included the removal of one of theoccurrences of “conventional”.

(245) Good

Thus this paper introduces an error detection on the basis of the third way (detectingsyntactic and semantic video coding violations), which is compatible with, yet moreeffective than, that of the conventional method.

Relevant Plain English Rules : 57, 54

Wordiness, like passive structures, sometimes makes the text look too formal, anddistant. The following example illustrates this point.

(246) Bad

“To our best knowledge, this is the first paper that gives a circumstantial evidencesuggesting that the open operation could be solved affirmatively.”

The first phrase in the poor example, above, is too formal (and wordy), and should be replaced witha more common and familiar expression. Taking this one step further, in the interest of botheconomy and directness, we could in fact simply begin the statement with “this is the first...”, sinceof course, the reader understands that all written statements in your report represent ideas that youbelieve, or that represent your best knowledge.

(247) Good

a. We believe that this is the first documented circumstantial evidence suggesting thatthe open operation could be solved affirmatively.

(or)

b. This is the first documented circumstantial evidence suggesting that the openoperation could be solved affirmatively.

Relevant Plain English Rules : 57, 2, 51

Whenever possible, it is best to seek out shorter, simpler expressions that can be used toreplace awkward and unwieldy phrases.

(248) Bad

“Especially, histogram modification is the method where the gray scale transformation isdesigned to realize the desirable intensity histogram.”

Often, what causes phrases to be awkward is a poor sentence structure, where clauses have beenpasted together in an unnatural string. In the repaired version of our poor example, we have bothreplaced the italicized awkward expression (with “involves”), and moved the verb to an earlier pointin the sentence.

(249) Good

Especially, histogram modification involves designing the grey scale transformation torealize the desirable intensity histogram.

Relevant Plain English Rules: 57

In the following examples, we have two pairs of sentences where the problem is with thesecond sentence of each. Each of these sentences contains wordy expressions that can be reduced.

(250) Bad

a. “Reject the call if some cliques already have the same number of calls as nd,respectively. Accept the calls in other cases.”

b. “Reject the call if some maximum cliques have the same number of calls as nd,respectively. Accept the calls in other cases.”

First, I should say that in the first sentence of each, there is a problem with “respectively” since thisimplies two items, followed by another two items the order of which would be in agreement withthe first two items. In both cases, however, there is only one item, so this word should be deleted. Next, and the focus here, is that in the second sentences of both examples, the phrase “in othercases” is both awkward and wordy. This can be replaced by a single word as shown below.

(251) Good

a. Reject the call if some cliques already have the same number of calls as nd. Acceptthe calls otherwise.

b. Reject the call if some maximum cliques have the same number of calls as nd. Accept the calls otherwise.

Relevant Plain English Rules : 57, 54

In giving credit for important research, sometimes authors overstate their case. Usually,it is best to simply make the citation without a lot of extra discussion.

(252) Bad

“The result agrees with the classical one by Young [1] when α = 1.”

In this example the italicized expression can be omitted, since it adds little to what the readeralready knows, and uses several words to make a simple attribution.

(253) Good

The result agrees with Young [1] when α = 1.

Relevant Plain English Rules : 57, 40

Sometimes, the obvious need not be stated. In general, when we use tables, diagramsand figures, we are doing this so the reader may better understand the information we arediscussing. This is the expected practice, and we need not tell the reader that these representationsare for that purpose.

(254) Bad

“In order to make the later explanation easy, Fig. 1 shows the block diagram of thenewly proposed neural-net based controller [...].”

In the poor example, the italicized phrase tells us what we already know; figures are to help usunderstand the discussion. We do not need to tell the reader this.

(255) Good

Fig. 1 shows the block diagram of the newly proposed neural-net based controller [...].

Relevant Plain English Rules: 57

The last example to be considered here in this section on wordiness is challengingbecause it contains many problems, including poor word order, word choice, repetition and ofcourse wordiness. Let us see what we can do, from the perspective of mainly handling thewordiness problems, but also addressing the other issues as well.

(256) Bad

“On the study of turbo codes over a practical channel by a Monte Carlo simulation, weshould be forced to spend a lot of time on the simulation.”

From the perspective of wordiness, the phrase “on the study of” is a good candidate for reduction. We have incorporated this idea simply as “studying” in the revised example. We also reversed theorder of the main clauses, deleted the repetition of “simulation”, and improved upon the wordchoice of “forced”--even then, it still probably needs further intervention from the original author.

(257) Good

We would likely be required to spend a significant amount of time in a Monte Carlosimulation studying turbo codes over a practical channel.

Relevant Plain English Rules : 57, 37

3.2.c. Redundancy

Redundancy is similar to, and overlaps with, both wordiness and repetition. It is likerepetition, which involves repeating identical or similar words and phrases, but differs in thatredundancy can usually be overcome by deletion of unnecessary words, phrases and sentences,while repetition usually requires rewording, with some trimming of unnecessary words. Wordiness,on the other hand, is a problem involves using too many words to get a simple idea across, and can

usually be overcome by seeking out shorter, more economical expressions. In other words,repetition is usually cured by thinking of alternative expressions with similar meanings, wordinessis usually cured by replacing longer expressions with shorter ones of similar meaning, whileredundancy (a basic rule of Economy) is usually overcome by simply deleting the repeated wordsand phrases. We want to avoid restatement and redundancy whenever possible, so as to economizeon our message, and keep the readers focused. In this section we will of course see overlaps withthe problems we noted above, for both repetition and wordiness. Let us look at two examples ofredundancy to see what is meant by the unnecessary repetition of information.

(258) Bad. Redundancy.

In Suzuki, 1999, an evaluation technique using Binary Packing evaluationwas proposed. Binary Packing evaluation, which is based on the concept of BinaryPacking, is one of the evaluations.

Here, the same word has been used several times within a very small textual space. Similar torepetition, the difference is that redundant terms usually can be deleted, and the text shortened withno major problems, while repeated terms simply need to be replaced by other words or expressionsof similar meaning. Let us look at how we can combat the redundancy in the last example.

(259) Good. Redundancy.

Suzuki, 1999, proposed a Binary Packing evaluation technique.

Relevant Plain English Rules : 56, 54, 32The following is a similar example.

(260) Bad

“In [7],[8], an approximate technique using Clique Packing approximation has beenproposed. Clique Packing approximation, which is based on the concept of CliquePacking [6], is one of the approximations.”

First, it is easy to see that “approximate” in various forms has been repeated several times in the badexample. As with most examples of redundancy, the remedy is not to find alternative words todescribe the same thing, as we did with repetition, but to find ways to simply trim the text of someof the redundant (unnecessary) information. Finally, I should point out that just because numeralsin brackets are used does not mean regular rules of grammar do not apply. Thus, when two itemsare listed next to each other in subject position, we need a conjunction (“[7] and [8]”).

(261) Good

[7] and [8], proposed an approximate technique using Clique Packing approximation,based on [6].

Relevant Plain English Rules: 56

3.2.d. Conjunctions

In this short section, we look at the misuse of conjunctions, where they have been placedat the heads of sentences, or where an incorrect conjunction has been employed, or one has beenused incorrectly.

It is usually best not to start a sentence with a conjoining conjunction such as “and”, “or”and “but”. These are best used to conjoin clauses within a sentence.

(262) Bad

“And they have learning abilities and versatilities that can adapt to the unknownenvironment.”

As we can see from this example, below, it is often possible simply to omit the “head” conjunctionwith no loss of meaning.

(263) Good

They have learning abilities and versatilities that can adapt to the unknownenvironment.

Relevant Plain English Rules: 23

The following is a similar set of examples.

(264) Bad

“And vice versa for the case when the searched range is in the right of a node.”

In this example, the repair was a little more involved, since “vice versa for the case” cannot be usedto begin a sentence.

(265) Good

The opposite is true for the case when the searched range is in the right of a node (i.e.,the left sons are not included in the searched range, and thus are not visited).

Relevant Plain English Rules : 23, 62The following is another example of the improper use of a conjunction to begin a sentence.

(266) Bad

“But the detailed manipulation for this algorithm is described in Appendix A.”

As we have noted, it is best not to begin statements with common conjunctions such as “and”, “or”,“but” and so forth.

(267) Good

The detailed manipulation for this algorithm is described in Appendix A.

Relevant Plain English Rules : 23, 62Here is another example of a sentence improperly initiated with conjunctions, in this case, theproblem is with “because”.

(268) Bad

“[...] the statistical static timing analysis becomes important [for] designing high speedand low power VLSIs. Because, designers often set excessive margins derived from the

worst-case analysis [...].”

In this example, the easiest solution is to simply combine the two sentences that are separated by theconjunction as the head of the second sentence. In some cases, though, the resulting combinedsentence may be overly long and complex, and might require other forms of repair. I have replaced“because” with “since” in this example, since I consider it a stylistic improvement (where “because”is often considered more formal than “since”).

(269) Good

[...] the statistical static timing analysis becomes important [for] designing high speedand low power VLSIs since designers often set excessive margins derived from theworst-case analysis [...].

Relevant Plain English Rules : 11, 62

This next problem has to do with choosing the right conjunction.

(270) Bad

“[...] the location of an error in the bitstream that the decoder detects can not be the onethat the error has actually occurred.”

Clearly, the second “that” refers to “location”, and should be replaced by “where” -- the proper termto be used for “place”. Notice also that “the one” refers to the same place, and as such is redundantand can be omitted.

(271) Good

[...] the location of an error in the bitstream that the decoder detects can not be wherethe error has actually occurred.

Relevant Plain English Rules : 62, 63Choosing the right conjunction depends upon what kind or relationship the conjoined structuresenjoy, such as agreement, opposition, cause, and so forth.

(272) Bad

“From the renewal argument, it is sufficient to consider the system behaviour for onecycle and we drop the discrete time index i (i = 1,2,...) in the following discussion.”

The problems in the poor example involve the conjunction “and” (suggesting equal coordination ofjoined clauses) and mixed English spellings (uses British spelling in a paper otherwise employingonly American English). The conjunction “and” has been replaced with “so”, showing a causalrelationship rather than one of equivalence, or agreement.

(273) Good

From the renewal argument, it is sufficient to consider the system behavior for one cycleso we drop the discrete time index i (i = 1,2,...) in the following discussion.

Relevant Plain English Rules : 62, 2, 3, 9

In the last set of examples involving problems with conjunctions, we see the contrastive

“but” placed in a coordinate position (which requires “and”).

(274) Bad

“PN2’s are sufficiently simple for the mathematical analysis, such as invariant analysis,but have enough modeling power.”

When “but” is used, we expect the second set of facts to contrast with the first. In this case, thesecond clause simply adds to, or embellishes, the first clause, so “and” is required.

(275) Good

PN2’s are sufficiently simple for the mathematical analysis, such as invariant analysis,and have adequate modelling power.

Relevant Plain English Rules : 33, 34, 62

3.3. Directness

There are four basic guidelines supporting the Principle of Directness: (a) State whatthings are, not what they seem to be; (b) State the subject clearly; (c) State the "bottom line"succinctly; (d) Avoid negatives. In general, this principle combats ambiguity, vagueness, andobscurity in favor of clarity, concreteness and recognizability.

3.3.a. Visualize your Message

One idea to keep in mind when writing is visualization. It is important to try to helpyour readers “see” what you are talking about by using clear images, common references, and easy-to-follow guidelines. It is important to remember that what appears obvious to us may not be soobvious to the reader, so it is up to us to write in a way that will ensure an accurate understanding ofour intended message. We will see how many of the corrections that follow in this section, on thePrinciple of Directness, help to make the statements more “visible”, and understandable, to thereader.

3.3.b. Concrete

The term “concrete” refers to something tangible, something that we can easily picture,or understand. It is grounded in real world referents, and comes from our common sharedexperiences. Often, being concrete requires us to replace very general expressions with moreprecise ones, or similarly, replacing words with multiple meanings with ones that have only singularinterpretations.

One important part of writing successfully is choosing the best word to fit the situation. Often, the right word is not only precise (direct) it is economical as well. Let us look at someexamples of poor word choice problems.

(276) Bad

“In this paper, we use the idea in [8] to resolve such an inconsistent problem.”

In this example, we can replace “inconsistent problem” with the shorter “inconsistency”. Often we

will see that adjectival phrases can be replaced by simple nouns, as we have done here.

(277) Good

In this paper, we use the idea in [8] to resolve such an inconsistency.

Relevant Plain English Rules : 33, 34, 9

In research reports, one of the more common mistakes is the misuse of the term“research”, both as a verb and a noun.

(278) Bad

“There are only a few researches for the second problem.”

Here, “research” is treated as a countable noun, which it is not. Further, “for” should be replacedwith “to”, but even then, finding another more suitable expression is the best solution.

(279) Good

To date there has been only a few investigations related to the second problem.

Relevant Plain English Rules : 33, 34

We see a problem with the word “exist” from yet another angle. As discussed before,“is” is usually a more suitable replacement.

(280) Bad

“Then there exists at least one computation path that has the following sequence: [...].”

(281) Good

Then there is at least one computation path that has the following sequence: [...].

Relevant Plain English Rules : 51, 33

In this next example, the wrong superlative was chosen, resulting in an awkward phrase.

(282) Bad

“Among them, MUSIC is most well-known for its super-resolution capability andsimpleness.”

The superlative “most” cannot be joined with expression “well-known”; one or the other must bechosen, and if it is the superlative you want, “best” is the better choice.

(283) Good

Among them, MUSIC is best known for its super-resolution capability and itssimplicity.

Relevant Plain English Rules : 9, 33, 34

Here is another problem dealing with the difficulty of using a superlative with anadjective, in this case, there simply is a better choice available.

(284) Bad

“Rijndael is the most famous SPN-type cipher with a variable block length and avariable key length [...].”

The word “famous” is out of place because it assumes a value judgment of sorts, and should beavoided in technical and scientific writing. Instead, a more neutral approach should be adopted.

(285) Good

Rijndael is the most widely known (common, recognized) SPN-type cipher with avariable block length and a variable key length [...].

Relevant Plain English Rules : 33, 34

Sometimes new words can be derived from existing ones, but in most cases, this is thewrong path to take.

(286) Bad

“Thus, the proposed procedure only maintains the irredundant set of options, and in theend of the procedure bottom.up(i), redundant options are pruned.”

In this example, “irredundant” has been coined, but as there are suitable existing expressions torepresent the intended meaning, the existing expressions should be used. We have left unchanged“bottom.up”, but this too appears to be in need of repair.

*In English, we can actually create new words rather freely, and this form is possible from thatperspective. However, from the perspective of Plain English, we suggest that you avoid usinguncommon words and expressions, and that you also avoid coining new terms so that your readerswill not have to spend time trying to understand such forms.

(287) Good

Thus, the proposed procedure only maintains the non-redundant set of options, and inthe end of the procedure bottom.up(i), redundant options are pruned.

Relevant Plain English Rules: 51

3.3.c Pronouns

In this section, we look at various problems involving the misuse of pronouns. Oftenthis involves poor alignment between the original subject and the pronouns that follow, andsometimes it involves the use of pronouns where no clear subjects precede them. We will look atthese and other problems involving pronouns below.

In this next case, we need to know who, or what, is “enabled”.

(288) Bad

“This feature enables to represent mobile codes in a distributed environment.”

We suggest that the pronoun “us” can be inserted here, but perhaps other representations are

possible as well.

(289) Good

This feature enables us to represent mobile codes in a distributed environment.

Relevant Plain English Rules: 40

Here is another example of a missing pronoun; we need to know what is “extended”.

(290) Bad

“By using the following transition matrix [equation], and by extending to the combinedtrellis, their method can be applied for the Markovian impulsive noise channel.”

In addition to handling the omission of the pronoun, we have also changed the preposition, “for”, to“to”.

(291) Good

By using the following transition matrix [equation], and by extending it to the combinedtrellis, their method can be applied to the Markovian impulsive noise channel.

Relevant Plain English Rules : 40, 77

In this next case, the pronoun that is used can be replaced with a better alternative.

(292) Bad

“As for the trapdoor [...] once given α, trapdoor of σ, one can compute σ-1(y)efficiently. So he can also compute ψ efficiently.”

In this last example, the first sentence introduces the neutral term, “one”, but in the sentence thatfollows, switches to the pronoun “he”. This is of course both inconsistent (a violation ofCohesiveness) and incorrect. The noun substitute “one” should be used in the second sentence aswell (or, alternatively, “you” can replace “one” in both cases). Another reason to avoid “he” is thesexist implications of using a gender-based pronoun.

(293) Good

As for the trapdoor [...] once given α, and a trapdoor of σ, one can compute σ-1(y)efficiently. So, one can also compute ψ efficiently.

Relevant Plain English Rules : 28, 40

3.3.d. Word category change

This is a special section on the misuse of words where the problems are the result ofchanging the words from one type to another incorrectly, such as taking a verb, and changing it intoa noun, or taking verb and turning it into an adverb, and other such alterations of the basic wordforms.

(294) Bad

“When we have computer [equation ]for an [equation], all we have to do is to incrementthe counter for [equation] by one.”

While “increment” has the idea of “increase”, it is not a verb, and cannot be used as one; rather, atrue verb should be used. Notice that we have retained “increment” in the repaired version. Finally,I assume “computed” (a verb), is incorrectly written as “computer” (a noun).

*In English, we can actually create new words rather freely, and this form is possible from thatperspective. However, from the perspective of Plain English, we suggest that you avoid usinguncommon words and expressions, and that you also avoid coining new terms so that your readerswill not have to spend time trying to understand such forms.

(295) Good

When we have computed [equation] for an [equation], all we have to do is to increasethe counter for [equation] by one increment.

Relevant Plain English Rules: 9

Here, we see tense added to the wrong constituent of a phrase.

(296) Bad

“[...] the information on the main memory since the last checkpoint is back-uped in asecondary medium.”

The phrasal verb, “back up”, contains the verb “back”, which is the only thing can accept tense inthis expression. We also changed the preposition “on” to “in”.

*In English, we can actually create new words rather freely, and this form is possible from thatperspective. However, from the perspective of Plain English, we suggest that you avoid usinguncommon words and expressions, and that you also avoid coining new terms so that your readerswill not have to spend time trying to understand such forms.

(297) Good

[...] the information in the main memory since the last checkpoint is backed up in asecondary medium.

Relevant Plain English Rules : 9, 77

The following example exemplifies the principles of “Plain English”. While the targetexpression in the first example is not grammatically incorrect, the replacement in the good exampleis more economical, and direct.

(298) Bad

“Thereby, the approximation of Eq. (2) is not obtained with accuracy.”

We see many of these kinds of errors, where a phrase is made combining “with” with a noun toproduce a pseudo-adverb. It is best just to use an appropriate adverb.

(299) Good

Thereby, the approximation of Eq. (2) is not obtained accurately.

Relevant Plain English Rules : 6, 5, 15

3.3.e. Avoid (multiple) negatives

One very distracting element in a statement can be the misuse, or overuse, of negatives. Negatives include words such as “not”, “no”, “nor” and so forth. The use of negatives cause readersparticular problems when more than one of them are used in a single sentence, as we shall seebelow. Sometimes, though, even a single negative, when used with qualifiers such as “only” or“just” can be quite confusing as well. As a general rule, avoid using more than one negative termin a sentence.

We start off this section by looking at an example that has four negatives in a singlesentence, which, as a result, is very hard to understand.

(300) Bad

“In addition, there are no-way functions that are neither separated nor common trapdoor no-way, which can be called semi-separated.”

Part of the problem here is that clearly some of the negatives are required, particularly the “no” inthe “no-way” expressions. So, these are maintained, and the confusing “neither/nor” pair replacedwith two instances of the simple negative, “not”. So while we did not succeed in reducing thenumber of negative expressions in the example, we did make the example easier to read by usingsimpler negatives.

(301) Good

In addition, there are no-way functions that are not separated and do not share acommon no-way trapdoor, which can be called semi-separated.

Relevant Plain English Rules: 42

Finally, we have an example with the awkward positioning and use of a negative.

(302) Bad

“A behavior of the solution in E-transformation algorithm is determined only by notnetwork properties but a given graph.”

The problem here is with the phrase “not only” which has been rearranged incorrectly, and thereforemakes the sentence extremely difficult to understand. We can avoid this by deleting “only”, andfocusing on the important issues, while retaining the negative.

(303) Good

The behavior of the solution in the E-transformation algorithm is determined by a givengraph, not network properties.

Relevant Plain English Rules: 42

3.3.f. Avoid Lexical Ambiguity: Wrong word choice

We have already mentioned the problems of word choice in our discussion of theimportance of “concrete” vocabulary, above, so we will just state here that we want to chose wordsthat are precise, common and easily understood. Often times, the problem is one where a betterword exists to replace the one chosen for the statement. This is a difficult problem to overcome,however, since we sometimes choose words from dictionaries that appear to suit the context, butactually do not. A good rule to follow here would be to use only words that you know, and that arecommonly known to your readers as well. Let us look at some of the wrong choices, below.

A frequently misused word is “another”, first mentioned in our discussion of articleusage. It is perfectly acceptable in the right context, but it is often placed in the wrong context.

(304) Bad

“Figure 7 shows another results computed for n - 31, where R = 100 [...].”

The problem here is that “another” refers specifically to “an other”, meaning one other, not (many)others, as the author intends here. We replace it with “additional” to get the multiple conceptacross.

(305) Good

Figure 7 shows additional results computed for n - 31, where R = 100 [...].

Relevant Plain English Rules : 33, 34

Sometimes words are employed to play greater roles than they are intended to play. Inthis next set of examples, there is a mismatch between the verb and the noun in this regard.

(306) Bad

“In order to improve this problem, we use the long time average value of the error signale(n) for updating the coefficients [...].”

Essentially, “problems” do not get improved (like a wine improves with age). Good things getbetter, perhaps, but bad things likely will worsen. Essentially, we want to “correct”, “solve” or“overcome” problems.

(307) Good

In order to solve this problem, we use the long time average value of the error signal e(n) for updating the coefficients [...].

Relevant Plain English Rules : 33, 34

Another frequent problem area involves the misuse of “how” in discussing manner andmethod.

(308) Bad

“In designing multi-variable control systems, it is important how to remove orcompensate for the interactions.”

In this example, clearly we are missing a verb that follows “it is important” and precedes “how to

remove”; we suggest inserting “understand” as a possible solution here.

(309) Good

In designing multi-variable control systems, it is important to understand how toremove or compensate for the interactions.

Relevant Plain English Rules: 37

The following example involves another difficulty with “how”.

(310) Bad

“However, since most process control systems are multi-variable systems with largemutual interactions, it is strongly desired how to prevent the effects of the interactions.”

In this case, “how” intrudes, and can be deleted, while “strongly desired”, which is conversationaland awkward, is replaced by the more direct “important”. Also, “prevent” is not a good choice touse with interactions, likely “restrict” better covers this idea.

(311) Good

However, since most process control systems are multi-variable systems with largemutual interactions, it is important to restrict the effects of the interactions.

Relevant Plain English Rules: 37

Some words are just too ambiguous to be of any use. One such word is “enough”. It hasa relative meaning (must be related or contrasted to something), but often authors leave out theother side of the contrast. It is best to avoid “enough” in favor of a more precise term.

(312) Bad

“In other words, as the i-th neural network is trained enough, the following relation canbe approximately expected: [equation].”

(313) Good

In other words, when the i-th neural network is trained sufficiently, the followingrelation can be expected: [equation].

Relevant Plain English Rules : 33, 34, 37

Words that are too simple, or common, sometimes are to be avoided. Such words can bevague, and often misleading.

(314) Bad

“Therefore, no work has been done on the mathematical analysis.”

The verb “done” usually is used in the context of finishing an activity, though here it is simplymeant to refer to whether any action has been taken. So, in this case, “performed” is a betteralternative.

(315) Good

Therefore, no work has been performed on the mathematical analysis.

Relevant Plain English Rules : 33, 34

Next, we see a similar problem with the common word “keep”.

(316) Bad

“PCHECK directly calculates signal wave forms to keep high accuracy of delay time.”

Here, “keep” isn't too far off target, but it is like “done” in that it is so common, it has less precisionthan our preferred alternative.

(317) Good

PCHECK directly calculates signal wave forms to maintain high accuracy of delay time.

Relevant Plain English Rules : 33, 34Still another ambiguous common word is “hard”.

(318) Bad

“A one-way function is intuitively a function which is easy to compute but hard toinvert.”

This is an another very common situation where words like “hard” (and “good”, “keep”, “done”,etc.) are too common to be used precisely. Here, “hard” for example can refer to difficulty, density,complexity, and so forth. It should be replaced by a more precise descriptive term.

(319) Good

A one-way function is intuitively a function which is easy to compute but difficult toinvert.

Relevant Plain English Rules : 33, 34

Another common error is giving animate properties to inanimate objects, such as in thefollowing example.

(320) Bad

“These high-level object Petri nets aim to describe real applications in an object-orientedmanner [...].”

Whatever a “Petri net” is, it is clear that it is not a living organism, and thus can not have an “aim”,or purpose, though it may be used in such a way as to achieve an aim or fulfill a purpose. We repairthis by restricting our vocabulary to terms that are suitable for inanimate objects.

(321) Good

These high-level object Petri nets are used to describe real applications in an object-oriented manner [...].

Relevant Plain English Rules : 33, 34Here is another example of wrongly assuming animate qualities of inanimate objects.

(322) Bad

“Thus, the delay estimation with net decomposition produces a conservative, orpessimistic result.”

The word “pessimistic” can be contrasted with “hopeful”; both of which are very human qualities,and cannot be assigned to a kind of result, which is an inanimate object, or idea.

(323) Good

Thus, the delay estimation with net decomposition produces a conservative, orunsuitable (or, undesirable?), result.

Relevant Plain English Rules : 33, 34

The next example contains a wordy phrase that is both awkward and ambiguous, and canbe replaced by a more economical, and precise alternative.

(324) Bad

“[...] the noise model proposed by Middleton et al. is well known, and provides verygood fits to a variety of noise with a determination method of noise parameters [8].”

(325) Good

“[...] the noise model proposed by Middleton et al. is well known, and is suitable for avariety of different types of noise with a determination method of noise parameters [8].

Relevant Plain English Rules : 33, 34, 37

Formulaic expressions are often misused. Such expressions include patterns such as,“on the one hand, .... and on the other hand”, “left for future research”, and here, “regarding” and“in regards to”.

(326) Bad

“As regards the complexity issue, the most time-consuming operation in the imageenhancement algorithm by Peli and Lim is 2-D low-pass filtering.”

The problem in this example is that the italicized expression is an archaic expression morecommonly represented as “in regard to”, and, though acceptable, is a wordy alternative to ourpreferred form, “regarding”.

(327) Good

Regarding the complexity issue, the most time-consuming operation in the imageenhancement algorithm by Peli and Lim is 2-D low-pass filtering.

Relevant Plain English Rules : 33, 34, 57

Authors sometimes have a difficult time working with a verb in order to indicate thatsomething has been realized, changed, or activated. In these situations, awkward phrases are

constructed where in many cases simple alternative expressions exist.

(328) Bad

“[...] the generated unstable limit cycle becomes to a stable one after the D-type ofbranching, [...].”

We can see that the awkward phrase in the bad example is wordy and imprecise, while itsreplacement is both economical and precise.

(329) Good

...the generated unstable limit cycle stabilizes after the D-type of branching, [...].

Relevant Plain English Rules : 33, 57

In this next set of examples, words related to time need some repairs, keeping in mindthat even the most current research is slightly out of date by the time the findings are actuallypublished.

(330) Bad

“Their older result shows that the decrease of estimated upper bound is saturated at 7rounds. Their new result is much better for 4 to 10 rounds, and shows monotonicdecrease for more than 7 rounds.”

Though I have corrected several problems here, we want to focus on the replacement of “older”with “earlier” and “new” with “recent”. In terms of research, investigations that happened in thepast were undertaken at an earlier point in time, while the most recent research brings us close, butnot quite to the present (all publications, by definition, come out after the work is finished, and otherinvestigations have been initiated)--even the “newest” discoveries become occurrences in the recentpast from the perspective of publications.

(331) Good

Their earlier results show that the decrease of estimated upper bound is saturated at 7rounds. Their most recent results are much better for 4 to 10 rounds, and show amonotonic decrease for more than 7 rounds.

Relevant Plain English Rules : 33, 34, 27, 76, 15

Finally, we look at an example that combines two points made above. Like the problemswith “done” and “keep”, discussed, above, words such as “good” are simply too common to be usedwith much precision in a technical context. Further, like “famous”, there is an underlying nuance ofjudgment here, which is better when slightly neutralized.

(332) Bad

“This good feature enables to find critical paths in a very short execution time [...].”

(333) Good

This useful feature enables us to find critical paths in a very short execution time [...].

Relevant Plain English Rules : 35, 33, 34

3.3.g. Avoid Lexical Ambiguity: Avoid vague terms

This section closely follows the last, in that both are concerned with proper wordselection. In the last section, though, word selection was generally incorrect because the context ofthe statement required a different word altogether from that of the original that was chosen. Here,we go to the heart of concreteness, and unambiguous terms, by observing word choices that werepoor simply because they were too vague, or ambiguous, and while they may fit loosely into thecontext, they still have either multiple interpretations, or not enough content to deliver any kind ofinterpretation at all. It may be difficult to see clear divisions between the sections on“concreteness”, “lexical ambiguity” and “vague terms”, but that is because there are clear overlapsof meanings, problems and solutions. Overall, we are simply taking slightly different viewpoints onmany of the common problems that we face when we want to improve our directness by improvingthe precision of our word choice. The most important thing to understand, then, is that there aremany different ways in which we can look at the imprecision of word usage, and that there are alsomany different ways we can choose to repair them. Ultimately, it is a combination of strategies thatwill prove most effective in developing better writing skills.

In the following example, an awkward phrase in the bad example suffers from lack ofprecision.

(334) Bad

“Accordingly, the Wiener filter yields only an approximately optimum solution tospeech enhancement problems.”

I understand the original statement to indicate that a less than optimum solution was developed, so Ihave tried to make this meaning more direct in the good example. It may be that the authorsintended an even more optimistic nuance, however, if it wasn't successful, it should be clearly statedthat this was the case. It appears that partial failure is obscured (intentionally?) by the confusingdescription.

(335) Good

Accordingly, the Wiener filter does not provide a perfect solution to speechenhancement problems.

Relevant Plain English Rules : 33, 34

It is important to avoid tentative, unsure statements. If you are truly unsure, then it isbest just to omit such conclusions. If you wish to suggest a certain degree of uncertainty, do with ameasure of directness.

(336) Bad

“In this regard, this may imply that a new measure may be necessary to evaluate thecomplexity network [...].”

The italicized phrase is too vague, with both “may” (twice) and “imply” suggesting uncertainty. Does it imply, or doesn't it? We can reduce the tentativeness somewhat, and the wordiness, byreplacing it with “suggests”, which is more straightforward.

(337) Good

In this regard, this suggests that a new measure is necessary to evaluate the complexity

network [...].

Relevant Plain English Rules: 34

The next example exemplifies a very common error that in essence asks the reader tobelieve your statements based on intangible supporting evidence. If evidence exists to support yourconclusions, make reference to it, don't assume the reader automatically shares your exact sameknowledge and expertise base.

(338) Bad

“It is known that R(G;p) can be computed by enumerating [...].”

The italicized phrase suggests that the reader is aware of facts that may or may not be shared. It isbest not to place the burden of knowing on the reader, and to supply appropriate support for all suchconclusions. Note that we have also discussed this phrase in the section on passives, where wepointed out that this phrase suffers from a missing subject, as well. Our repair addresses theseproblems, and erases the ambiguity.

(339) Good

According to Author, date [1], R(G;p) can be computed by enumerating [...].

[Note: Replace “author” with real name, and “date”, with real reference date, such as “According toSuzuki, 1999, [1], R(G;p) can be computed by enumerating[...].]

Relevant Plain English Rules: 18This is another example of the author assuming what the reader knows. In virtually all situations,well known or unknown, it is best to cite supporting evidence.

(340) Bad

“It is well known that the renewal process belongs to more wide class of stochasticprocesses [...].”

Here we have added information (resources) that can be consulted to check for further supportingevidence. Of course, I am not suggesting that you make up fake references, but simply refer tothose sources that are applicable, rather than simply using a hearsay expression such as “it is wellknown”, or even “they say.” The “cf.” in the good example means, “confer with”, “compare to”, or“check for further information”.

(341) Good

It is well known (cf. [12*], [23*]) that the renewal process belongs to a wider class ofstochastic processes [...]. [* these are not actual references, but suggest where theyshould be included]

Relevant Plain English Rules : 18, 33, 34

In this next example, we see an expression that is both confusing and imprecise.

(342) Bad

“In fact, moderate-size networks used in testing randomized FPTAS in [16] can beanalyzed by ours exactly. Here it should be noted that ours is an exponential algorithm,

although its time complexity is mildly growing [...].”

In the poor example, “ours” needs to be spelled out specifically. I have suggested that perhaps“algorithm” was what the authors were thinking of. Also, “exactly” doesn't quite fit here.

(343) Good

In fact, moderate-size networks used in testing randomized FPTAS in [16] can beprecisely analyzed by our algorithm. Here it should be noted that our algorithm isexponential, although its time complexity is slightly increasing [...].

Relevant Plain English Rules : 33, 34, 5, 46

Wordy and ambiguous phrases are worsened when broken up into smaller parts anddistributed throughout the sentence.

(344) Bad

“Below we summarize in what points our results are interesting.”

The awkwardness of this last example comes from the splitting of the wordy and imprecise phrase,“what points are interesting” which can be reworded simply as “interesting (or important) points”.

(345) Good

Below we summarize the important aspects of our results.

Relevant Plain English Rules : 57, 34, 33

In the next examples, it is unclear whether the author intended to convey vagueness orbias.

(346) Bad

“The degradation by the check markering is supposedly similar to them. Therefore, theso-called epsilon-filter is used to reduce the random noise of low amplitude.”

The words “supposedly” and “so-called” both have some nuance of disbelief or doubt, so it isunclear how we are to react to the statements (and as a result, should be left out of the text). Shouldthe reader doubt that “check markering” is similar, or that the “epsilon-filter” is actually worthconsidering? Perhaps the author thinks that these two items were misnamed? In any case, it isimpossible to tell what the intent was, and in most cases, if there is dissension, it should be clearlyspelled out. Please note that “markering” is used as in the original, but I believe “marking” is thecorrect form, as “markering” cannot be found in a usual English language dictionary.

*In English, we can actually create new words rather freely, and this form is possible from thatperspective. However, from the perspective of Plain English, we suggest that you avoid usinguncommon words and expressions, and that you also avoid coining new terms so that your readerswill not have to spend time trying to understand such forms.

(347) Good

The degradation by the check markering is similar to them. Therefore, the epsilon-filteris used to reduce the random noise of low amplitude.

Relevant Plain English Rules : 33, 34, 80

3.3.h. Word Usage: “much”

This is another special section devoted to common errors found in many researchreports. Specifically, there are many problems involving the use of the word “much” sometimes asan adjective (where better adjectives, or alternative expressions, exist), and sometimes to replace“many”. This is a very common problem, but at the same time, can be easily corrected.

(348) Bad

“[...] we have to test much more examples, in this regard, the following results arepreliminary.”

In this first example, “much” is used to modify a countable word, “examples”, where of course“many” should be used instead.

(349) Good

[...] we have to test many more examples, in this regard, the following results arepreliminary.

Relevant Plain English Rules: 33Note another example of the misuse of “much” below.

(350) Bad

“As technologies are scaled down, however, much accuracy is required and Rubinstein[3] has introduced a calculation model utilizing second order circuit moments.”

Here, “much” is used to indicate “a large amount”, and can be easily replaced by “increased”,“significant”, or “a great deal of”.

(351) Good

As technologies are scaled down, however, increased accuracy is required so Rubinstein[3] has introduced a calculation model utilizing second order circuit moments.

Relevant Plain English Rules : 33, 34Though many examples of the misuse of “much” can be found in research papers, the foregoing twoshould provide the reader with an idea of the kinds of problems to be on the look out for. Avoidmixing non-count modifiers with count nouns, and avoid using “much” to indicate “a large amount”in affirmative statements.

3.3.i. Avoid Syntactic Ambiguity: Scope, word order, adjectives and adverbs

Here, we look at some of the problems involving word order, and particularly, theplacement of modifiers such as adjectives and adverbs in statements. Often, the incorrect placementof such modifiers can result in unintended meanings at best, or incorrect statements at worst. Usually, adverbs should be placed in a neighboring position, directly before or after the verbs theymodify (there are exceptions of course), while adjectives of course go before the nouns they modify,but follow a certain order of placement when more than one adjective is used to modify a single

noun. A good rule to follow for adjectives, then, would be to use at most only one adjective tomodify any given noun.

One of the words frequently misplaced in a sentence is “only”. If placed too early, itlimits the entire statement, rather than the range of a single phrase, or word.

(352) Bad

“Only the difference in this case is the option calculation at the Steiner point.”

In the poor example, “only” appears to be a rhetorical device, representing something close to“however”, and if this is the case, such a transition marker should have been used. Otherwise,“only” would have to have been used as a limiting factor, and if so, is placed too far away from theitem that will be limited. In this case, it should be moved, as I have shown below.

(353) Good

The only difference in this case is the option calculation at the Steiner point.

Relevant Plain English Rules : 38, 59Next is a simple problem of a single word placed in the wrong order.

(354) Bad

“The output referred IP3 is higher 5.0 dB than the single balanced mixer.”

Usually, we put terms like “higher” and “lower” after the stated amounts, so in this case, it shouldbe “5.0 dB higher”.

(355) Good

The output referred IP3 is 5.0 dB higher than the single balanced mixer.

Relevant Plain English Rules : 37, 59Here is another example of the wrong placement of a single word.

(356) Bad

“This paper deals with a similar stochastic database management model to Sumita, Kaioand Goes [11][...].”

In this case, “similar” is actually coupled with “to”, but is used as a modifier to the expression“stochastic database management model”, and as a means to compare theirs to a similar modelproposed by the other authors noted. The repair in this case is to place “similar” and “to” togetheras they should be.

(357) Good

This paper deals with a stochastic database management model similar to Sumita, Kaioand Goes [11][...].

Relevant Plain English Rules : 37, 59Here is a very similar problem of split phrases.

(358) Bad

“[...] it has comparable compression performance to the best known data compressionutilities.”

This is another example where a basic phrase, “comparable to” (like “similar to”) above, has beensplit, and the resulting sentence rendered confusing. As before, it is best to keep such phrasesintact.

(359) Good

...it has compression performance comparable to the best known data compressionutilities.

Relevant Plain English Rules : 37, 59

Next is another relatively simply problem involving the misplacement of a single word,which in this case is an adverb.

(360) Bad

“[...] if [equation], then [equation] has self-computable solutions obviously.”

In general, it is best to place most adverbs either directly before or after the verb that they modify.

(361) Good

“[...] if [equation], then [equation] obviously has self-computable solutions.”

Relevant Plain English Rules : 37, 38Here is another example of the same problem of misplaced adverbs.

(362) Bad

“Then, statistical techniques such as importance sampling and variance reduction shouldbe applied to perform the system simulation effectively.”

(363) Good

Then, statistical techniques such as importance sampling and variance reduction shouldbe applied to effectively perform the system simulation.

Relevant Plain English Rules : 37, 60, 39Here is one final example of a misplaced adverb.

(364) Bad

“The quad-tree partitioning scheme is one scheme of handling blocks of various sizesefficiently.”

(365) Good

The quad-tree partitioning scheme is one scheme of efficiently handling blocks of

various sizes.

Relevant Plain English Rules : 5, 60

In this next case, we have another problem of word order, except that more words are involved; thewords are all fine, but their order is a problem.

(366) Bad

“On the other hand, when they belong to neighboring different coherent regions, theyfire synchronously [...].”

In this last example, we see “different” as the main modifier of a type of region. What type ofregion is modified? They are “coherent, neighboring regions”. We need to use the modifier thatidentifies place (neighboring) closest to the noun (regions), so “coherent” naturally precedes both.

(367) Good

On the other hand, when they belong to different coherent neighboring regions, they firesynchronously [...].

Relevant Plain English Rules : 5, 59

Often, word order is not an isolated problem, but is joined by others as well. In this nextexample, we can also see wordiness and repetition.

(368) Bad

“Moreover, this filter can be programmed the filter type even after it is fabricated bychanging the switch status pattern of the built-in switches.”

We can see that “filter” is unnecessarily repeated, before and after the verb that is performing anaction on it. We have corrected this awkward phrasing by combining elements, and movingeverything to one position.

(369) Good

Moreover, the type of this filter can be programmed even after it is fabricated bychanging the status pattern of the built-in switches.

Relevant Plain English Rules : 5, 57, 32

Next, we take another look at the problems with using “how” correctly (we discussedthis in an earlier section).

(370) Bad

“It is important how to tune the control parameters in PID control laws [...].”

The phrase “how to tune” must precede the phrase that tells us what is being tuned, which in thiscase is “the control parameters”. However, “it is important” should be placed after this subject inorder not to confuse the reader. I have suggested two possible ways to do this, below. This is anatural order, where the subject is followed by a comment on the subject.

(371) Good

a. How to tune the control parameters is important in PID control laws.

(or)

b. Tuning the control parameters is important in PID control laws.

Relevant Plain English Rules : 5, 37

Sometimes, awkward word order is combined with poor word choices, which leads toconfusing results.

(372) Bad

“The local contrast modification factor can be designed by the following four steps.”

In this last example, it appears that the four steps can perform the act of “designing”, which isnaturally not correct. We need to follow the steps in order to create the design. I have offered twoalternatives to get this message across.

(373) Good

a. The local contrast modification factor can be designed by following these four steps.

(or)

b. The local contrast modification factor recognizes the following four points.

Relevant Plain English Rules : 37, 15

Common expressions, such as “whether or not” are often misused.

(374) Bad

“Therefore, to know the motion is exist or not in each x (i, j, t) is needed.”

Here, “or not” sends up a flag, that tells us a comparison is being made, and it causes us to searchfor the rest of the expression, “whether”, which is missing. To repair this, the full expression mustbe employed. Notice too, that the problem with the final dangling verb “needed” has beencorrected. Note also that the article problem, when used with a non-count noun (“motion”), hasbeen corrected.

(375) Good

Therefore, it is important to know whether or not motion exists in each x (i, j, t).

Relevant Plain English Rules: 37

3.4. Appropriateness

The Principle of Appropriateness consists of four supporting guidelines: (a) Be truthfuland show politeness and respect for others; (b) Avoid idioms and slang, especially the more

obscure regional variations; (c) Avoid contractions and casual speech rules, and; (d) Usegrammatically correct sentences. In terms of research reports, the most common problems involvedthe use of conversational forms (casual speech rules), with a few examples of problems withneutrality and respect (both in a negative and positive way). Below, we review these specificproblem areas.

3.4.a. Appropriateness: Avoid conversational forms

In this section, we look at the intrusion of conversational expressions in reports, andobserve examples that overcome these problems. In general, we want to avoid colloquial, slang orjargon-like expressions in a scientific or technical report.

This is the first of several examples where one or more of the words used was tooconversational; they are often colorful, wordy, imprecise, and inappropriate, and as such, should beavoided.

(378) Bad

“Work on the problem has resulted in a flood of papers [1] - [4].”

Here, “flood” is a colorful, but imprecise and wordy description of a large amount of items.

(379) Good

Work on the problem has resulted in numerous papers [1] - [4].

Relevant Plain English Rules : 33, 34, 3, 71, 72

This next example is essentially a word choice error, based on conversationalexpressions.

(380) Bad

“The point is that these are not polynomial-time algorithms, although the running timehas been reduced by many clever ideas.”

The word “clever” is inappropriate since it is imprecise, and conversational, with a nuance of(positive) bias.

(381) Good

The point is that these are not polynomial-time algorithms, although the running timehas been reduced by many insightful ideas.

Relevant Plain English Rules : 71, 72, 33, 34

Words which refer to the speech act are obviously inappropriate in a written report.

(382) Bad

“This model may neglect many aspects of probabilistic link failures (say, burst, errorcaused by correlation), and yet it is really simple and captures some important aspects ofreliability.”

This is a rather straightforward example, where “say” referring to speech, should be replaced by

something like “for example”, or “such as”). Also, “really”, too, in this context, is conversational.

(383) Good

This model may neglect many aspects of probabilistic link failures (for example, bursterror caused by correlation), and yet it is both simple and robust, capturing someimportant aspects of reliability.

Relevant Plain English Rules : 72, 8

The next error similarly involves the idea that the text is being communicated orally(spoken), rather than visually (written).

(384) Bad

“While (18) may sound strange because the right hand of (18) is a time function and theleft hand is a constant, it is not.”

In a sense, “sound” is a wrong word choice, but incorrectly chosen, I think, because ofconversational influences. When we speak, things that people say, “may sound strange”, but whenwe write, there is no sound of course, so things may “appear”, “look” or “seem” strange.

(385) Good

While (18) may appear (seem) strange because the right hand of (18) is a time functionand the left hand is a constant, it is not.

Relevant Plain English Rules : 33, 34Here is another example of poor use of conversational forms.

(386) Bad

“Therefore, the proposed filter is expected to be altered with a microcomputer and soon.”

The phrase “and so on” is ambiguous, with a meaning similar to “etc.”, but the role of this is betterplayed by using “such as”, which serves to limit the range or scope, as in the following example.

(387) Good

Therefore, the proposed filter can be altered by devices such as a microcomputer.

[Note: It is unclear what “and so on” actually refers to; here I have interpreted it as meaning“computers and other similar electronic devices”.]Relevant Plain English Rules : 57, 71, 72, 6, 5The next poor example also contains a conversational “chatty” expression that should be avoided.

(388) Bad

“By the way, in process industries, PID control schemes [2],[3] are still mainly used dueto the simple structures and easiness of grasping the physical meanings of controlparameters.”

The phrase “by the way” adds nothing to the meaning of the statement, and in fact detracts from itby being overly familiar and conversational; it should be eliminated.

(389) Good

In process industries, PID control schemes [2] and [3], are still used due to their simplestructures and the ease by which they grasp the physical meanings of control parameters.

Relevant Plain English Rules : 71, 72, 57, 33, 34

We saw earlier the misuse of the word “much” to refer to amount (in another section),here, we see “lots”, an imprecise and conversational reference also used for amount, similarlymisused.

(390) Bad

“To the best of our knowledge, there are few studies of neural-net based PID controlschemes for multi-variable systems, although lots of works with respect to ISISO neural-net based PID controller design have been reported.”

We have actually dealt with the problem of “to the best of our knowledge” before (it needs not bestated, since we assume all statements in your report are to the best of your knowledge), but focushere on the use of “lots”. This term is very imprecise, and can be easily be replaced by a number ofsuitable alternatives.

(391) Good

There are few studies of neural-net based PID control schemes for multi-variablesystems, although numerous investigations with respect to the ISISO neural-net basedPID controller design have been reported.

Relevant Plain English Rules : 56, 71, 72Here is another problem with the overused word, “lots”, accompanied by some other problems aswell.

(392) Bad

“However, in practice, since it is considerably difficult to determine the PID parameterssuitability, lots of researches have been reported with respect to tuning schemes of PIDparameters.”

I have repaired the use of “lots” as well as “considerably” (a basic word choice error), and“researches”, a misuse of the non-count noun “research”, though the main problem regardingconversational forms is the improper use of “lots”.

(393) Good

However, in practice, since it is extremely difficult to determine the PID parameters, asignificant amount of research has been undertaken with respect to the tuning schemesof PID parameters.

Relevant Plain English Rules : 71, 72, 33, 34, 15

Finally, another way that conversational forms make their way into reports is through the

use of contractions. A good rule to follow here is to avoid all but the most common (“isn't”, “aren't”and “it's” are OK, but avoid most others, and even these could be avoided). This is more stylisticthan necessarily a detriment to readability, but the use of contractions can be somewhat distractingto some readers.

(394) Bad

“First, let’s consider the simple case, that is, the case of 2-terminal nets.”

Avoid “let's” in favor of the spelled out form.

(395) Good

First, let us consider the simple case, that is, the case of 2-terminal nets.

Relevant Plain English Rules: 72

3.4.b. Appropriateness: Adopt neutral, semi-formal, semi-polite style

It is important to stay within the confines of a particular writing style throughout theentire text. Basically we determine an appropriate level of usage, and use terms that conform to thatlevel. When in doubt as to what level of formality to use, it is best to use the somewhat detachedsemi-formal level for most of your writings. This level is used when your audience is not amongyour close inner circle of friends, but where the audience also does not require an obviousexaggerated degree of formality.

The key point here is to remember that we want to avoid bringing in words that are moresuitable for other levels, so that we avoid the mixing of degrees of formality within a single text. Inother words, we want to avoid overly familiar, or conversational, references in an otherwise “semi-formal” report. Similarly, if we refer neutrally to certain things (using words such as "one" or“you”), then we need to avoid bringing in non-neutral terms (like "he" or "she"). To repeat, wewant to avoid mixing usage levels, or degrees of formality, within a single text, while maintaining aneutral perspective, using a semi-formal, semi-polite style.

Overview

The conclusion is often the weakest part of the research paper, simply because so littleeffort goes into writing it, and as such, so little is actually covered in it. However, your conclusionshould revisit your originally stated problem that you investigated, and should succinctly summarizeyour main conclusions regarding this problem in a brief and direct manner. It should focus on thesuccesses achieved, but at the same time recognize its limitations, without dwelling on them. Itshould ultimately leave the reader with a clear and precise understanding of what it is you want heor she to think as a result of reading your discussion. The conclusion should not just taper off intoobscurity, with the author assuming that the results of the investigation somehow can speak forthemselves.

The way in which you summarize your analysis, and conclusions, follows the normalwriting patterns referred to in the previous sections, so I will not go into any new techniques here,but will close by noting some typical errors that are often found in this final section of the report. Some of these errors are ones that we have noted in other sections, above, and some are unique tothe conclusion.

4. Summaries and Conclusions

One common error in the concluding section of the report is the reference to the need forfurther research on the problem that was investigated. Let us consider some examples.

(396) Bad

a. “Therefore, we need further investigations.”b. “There still remain some further researches […].”

Both of the sentences above indicate the need for further work in the area of discussion, but both donot communicate this well. In the first example, “investigations”, as a plural, doesn’t quite fit(perhaps “research” would be better), since as a noun “investigations” conjures up ideas of criminalinvestigations, and though of course not limited to this area, still is not often used as it was above. In the second example, indicative of many other similar errors in other papers, “research” is treatedas a count noun, when in fact it is a mass noun, and cannot be used in the plural.

(397) Good

a. Therefore, we need to conduct further research in this area.b. There still remains a need for further research […].

Relevant Plain English Rules: 24, 25When we end sections and come to the conclusions of articles, we want to end on a strong note. Here, we see some unfortunate missteps at this juncture, with problems similar to those notedabove.

(398) Poor Concluding Statements

a. As such, there still remains some need for further researches.b. Following this, we think more investigations on these questions are necessary.

In the first poor example, above, “researches” is mistakenly used for the mass noun “research”, butin general, this, and the second sentence, both suffer from ambiguity and vagueness, and areawkwardly phrased. Let us look at the revised examples.

(399) Good Concluding Statements

a. Because the present study only covered a narrow range of applicable criteria, wesuggest that there is a need for further research in this area.b. We leave, however, these questions for future research.

Relevant Plain English Rules: 25, 33, 34Here precision (Directness) and context (Cohesiveness) provide guidelines for writing these almostformulaic closing statements. Because such comments are so common, they follow an establishedpattern, that if violated, look awkward and out of place.

The next poor example revisits our discussion of passive-looking structures, where theorder of subject (the investigators) and object (what they are investigating) is reversed, in thisconcluding statement.

(400) Bad

“To study the large deviation principle for correlation functions of chaotic binarysequences is left to us as further research.”

In order to make the poor example easier to read and understand, the order of the subject and objectshould be reversed creating a simple declarative sentence in the active voice.

(401) Good

We leave for further research the study of the large deviation principle for correlationfunctions of chaotic binary sequences.

Relevant Plain English Rules: 37

This next example really involves a word order problem, but is included here since itoccurs in, and deals with a main theme concerned with, the conclusion.

(402) Bad

“One of our future problems is fabricate this fully digitally programmable filter systemwith controlling the […] values.”

Here, “future” is treated as an adjective, and though perhaps an economical strategy, the results areless than satisfactory; it should be treated as a separate noun.

(403) Good

One of our problems for the future is to fabricate this fully digitally programmable filtersystem by controlling the […] values.

Relevant Plain English Rules: 76Here, we have another look at how to handle the final statements in a conclusion.

(404) Bad

“It is our future problem to analyze DCA in more practical models. For example, toconsider irregular cell structure is considered as one of the future problems.”

These statements are poor for several reasons. First, of course, there is the needless repetition ofwords such as “problems” and “consider”. Second, the phrase “future problem” is awkward, and assuch, an unfortunate way to end a research article. Let us see how this might look with attentionpaid to these two areas of concern. Even then, this is still a rather awkward last statement to leaveyour readers with, since it admits to the reader inadequacies of the present analysis, and suggests anuncertain future. Often this kind of statement is used, but with a more collaborative approach, asshown in the second good example.

(405) Good (1)

In the future we plan to analyze DCA in more practical models. For one example, wehope to consider the problem of irregular cell structure.

(405) Good (2)

In the future we plan to analyze DCA in more practical models. For one example, wehope to consider the problem of irregular cell structure. For the present, however, wehope our paper is of some small use for suggesting new ways for analyzing DCAmethods.

Relevant Plain English Rules: 24, 25To summarize the points made in this section, it is important to recognize that the conclusion is animportant part of any research paper. It should briefly review the key points raised in yourinvestigation, and leave your readers with a clear idea of what you want them to learn from yourdiscussion. It should both summarize and emphasize these key points. Finally, it should suggest thereport's inherent limitations, if any, and possibly suggest directions that the authors, or others, mightpursue in the future, in relation to the main issues discussed in the report. Many of the expressionsused in this final section are formulaic, and if deviated from significantly, become quite distractingto the reader. Ultimately, your conclusion should serve as a validation to the reader, remindingthem of why it was worth their time to sit down and read it in the first place. In other words, end ona high note, by reminding the reader of the valuable insights obtained during the course of thediscussion.

Overview

When you have completed writing the draft of your report, your work is not quitefinished. There are a few more useful steps to follow to ensure that your published report will beaccurate, understandable and well-received. We suggest that you allow about one month betweencompletion of your draft and the final submission deadline. In this time, we encourage you tofollow the following steps before finally submitting your report: (1) Self-edit; (2) Colleague check;(3) Revise and rewrite, and; (4) Native check (since some of these steps may be repeated, there willlikely be more than four steps involved in this stage of the writing process). These steps arediscussed in detail below.

5.1. Self-edit

Now that you have finished your “final” draft, it is time to edit it yourself. This is one ofthose tasks where it is easy to talk about but difficult to do. You are indeed your best editor sinceyou know better than anyone what information you intended to convey, and why. However, we areoften somewhat blinded by what we intended to communicate (it is clear in our own mind), andwhat we actually succeeded in communicating (it may not be as clear to others). This iscompounded by the fact that by the time we finish writing a report, the report is so familiar to us,that when we reread it, subconsciously, our mind “fills in the blanks” or overlooks small details, asif our intention overrides our actual accomplishment.

In order to check your text effectively, you must force yourself to read it critically. Youmust learn how to read it as if you were reading the report for the first time, and as if it were writtenby somebody else. Force yourself to be critical, to look for mistakes in grammar, logic andeverything else. Sometimes this is very hard to do unless you have set the report aside for a fewdays, and then go back to it with “fresh” eyes. As suggested below, you may choose to simply let afew others read your paper for you, while you take a brief break from the paper yourself.

One problem that writers face, when they have finished writing their papers, is that there is

simply no time left before the papers are to be submitted. They have worked hard to meet thesubmission deadline, and have met it, just barely. There is no time left for setting the manuscriptsaside for a few days, or for following the suggestions below, by having others read their papers aswell.

With the above in mind as you plan your paper, while the actual time spent “self-editing”your report might be just two or three days, you should set a deadline (to finish your “final” draft)three or four weeks in advance of the journal-submission deadline. Build this early completion dateinto your paper-writing routine. In this way, you will have time to set aside the paper for a few dayswhile you can have others read it and make suggestions. Your paper will be significantly improvedif you build this early completion date, and the other checking stages discussed below, into youroverall implementation plan.

5.2. Colleague check

A colleague check is very useful, and important. This is done by having anotherresearcher or two, with interests similar to your own, read your paper quickly, and to provideconstructive comments on all aspects of the paper as to how it could be further improved. Usuallytwo obstacles stand in our way of this. The first is, as discussed above, time. Often, we havetreated the submission deadline date as the date we need to finish our first “final” draft. But this ofcourse is wrong, since it allows for no further editing either by you, the author, or by yourcolleagues. The second obstacle is often based on our fragile egos. We aren't quite ready to sharethe results of our new report with others who are close to us. Needless to say, there is much fault inthis line of reasoning, since one primary purpose of writing the report is to share our findings andideas with others, which will happen in a matter of months, if not weeks, upon submission. Further,by not allowing some trusted colleagues to look over our paper, we are in fact limiting the chancesof our success in both the submission process, and in the eventual dissemination of our findings.

The natural solution is to finish the paper with enough time left before submission toallow for one or two of your colleagues to read and comment on your paper. Ask them to do so by aspecific deadline, and if they are unable to commit themselves to the task, find someone that can. Once you get the papers and their comments back, you can then go through your text againcarefully, and make changes as you see fit. Of course you don't have to follow all of yourcolleague's suggestions, but it is much better to understand what kinds of things they discovered,and whether there were indeed errors that could easily be corrected, and misunderstandings thatcould be cleared up, or neglected points added, and so forth. Allow a week to ten days to completethe colleague check.

5.3. Revise/rewrite

After you have received comments back from your colleagues, go through your paper againcarefully and critically, and make any changes that you feel necessary. As mentioned above, youknow best what you intended to communicate, so obviously you will be the person who determineswhat should be included, and what should be left out. In some cases, it may be simply too late toinclude changes in your text that a colleague suggested, but may warrant an addition of a footnote toshow that you are aware of problems in the analysis, but feel the present findings are valuable aswritten. In other cases you may even wish to acknowledge the colleague's contributions by namingthe colleague in a note, or by referring to the comments from an “anonymous” reviewer. Depending upon how extensive the revisions are, your revisions may take as many as three to fourdays to complete. Your revised paper should now be given to a native speaker of English to be

edited for spelling, grammar and usage problems.

5.4. Native check

A native check refers to having your paper read by a native speaker/writer of English. Normally, I would suggest you do this with your latest version of the paper, the version that youhave produced after having your colleagues check and comment on your paper, and after you havemade revisions based on their comments. A native checker may be a colleague, but does notnecessarily have to be. Here, you are less worried about content, and organization, but more ongrammar, usage, spelling and punctuation. For this reason, you need not have a native checker thatis familiar with your type of work. A good native checker should be able to read a typical journal-submission article in a day or two (but may need as much as a week), and provide corrections thatcan be easily incorporated into your final draft. After you have received comments from your nativechecker, you may need to repeat earlier steps in this revision stage in order to produce a final copyof your paper that is suitable for journal submission.

5.5. Submit

There is little to say here, other than follow your journal's submission guidelines,guidelines that of course helped to define the style and format of the paper from the point ofinitiation. There are usually formatting guidelines as well, which dictate requirements such as fonttype and size, margin dimensions, length, style of footnotes, citations, and so forth. In every case,follow the journal's specific submission guidelines.

For the actual submission, some journals require submission of drafts of the articles withthe author's name omitted, so that copies can be distributed to referees for review, others requirenote cards with the article title, key words, author's information, etc., and still others requiremultiple copies of the submission. As mentioned above, it is naturally important to follow theparticular guidelines of the journal you are submitting your article to. It should only take you a dayor two to package and submit your report.

In the end, you may be asked to further revise your article on the basis of the editor's or a qualifiedreferee's suggestions. In this case, you simply repeat some of the steps listed above, such as revisingand rewriting the report (followed by having a colleague check it again if you have made majorchanges, followed by revision and rewriting, and checking by a native speaker), before submittingyour second draft. Any subsequent drafts can usually be corrected solely by you, the originalauthor.

For a simple chart description (followed by a detailed discussion) of the steps we encourage thewriter to follow in writing a research paper, please see Appendix C “The Basic Steps for Writing aResearch Paper”. This can be used as a kind of summary of some aspects of this book, and can giveyou an overview of the time required to complete the revision stage discussed in this chapter.

5.6. Final Thoughts

In this handbook I have suggested how the basic principles of Plain English can be used tohelp write technical and scientific research papers clearly, concisely and correctly. We havereviewed many of the problems that writers face when using English as a second or foreignlanguage, and have attempted to demonstrate how the basic principles of Plain English can be used

to overcome such difficulties. By following the basic Plain English guidelines suggested above, youwill avoid most of the common errors found in many research papers written by non-native speakersof English, and will produce a text suitable for publication both in Japan and abroad, therebydisseminating your valuable research to the far reaches of the world in a professional and effectivemanner. Good luck!

Appendix A - 80 Rules of Plain English

Appendix B - Suggested Reading ListAppendix C - Reference Guide

Basic Steps for Writing a Research Paper-- from Conception to Submission --

Appendix A - 80 Rules of Plain English

Overview

Our goal when using the principles of Plain English is to make our text readable, so thatour intended message, as the author, corresponds as closely as possible to the message our readerunderstands, based on our discussion. We use Plain English to promote a one-to-onecorrespondence between what we want to communicate to our readers, and what our readersunderstand us to have communicated; a one-to-one correspondence between the written message,and the understood message.

There are four basic principles of Plain English; Cohesiveness, Directness, Economy andAppropriateness. These 4 principles in turn each govern 4 specific guidelines of language usage, fora total of 16 guidelines. The guidelines likewise govern a total of 80 separate rules. These rules are

not grammatical rules, for the most part, but represent preferred strategies, or tendencies, that ifemployed, will work together to produce text that is clear, concise and correct. The 4 principles, 16guidelines and 80 rules are all listed below. The numbers for the actual rules are based on the orderin which they were introduced in the original text in which they were first published (Plain WrittenEnglish), and are of no particular relevance here, other than as indicators for the rules mentioned in

the body of the present text.

1. PRINCIPLE OF COHESIVENESS

a. Conform to Context

(1) Use context to determine best word choice (W)(4) Use present tense, active voice, first person sing. (S) (13) Know the intended audience, and write to it (P)

(14) Choose a design and stick to it (P)(15) Use the correct articles ( a, an, the ) (P)

b. Use a Logical Order

(5) Use basic Subject-Verb-Object word order (S) (6) Avoid Passive, Causative and Conditional structures (S) (7) Place prepositions correctly in parallel structures (S) (16) Organize material logically by linking paragraphs (P) (17) Begin a paragraph with a good topic sentence (P) (18) Using facts and statistics in supporting statements (P) (19) Using examples and lists as supporting statements (P)(20) Using opinions as supporting statements (P) (21) Making statements of comparison and contrast (P)(22) Using the cause and effect sequence (P)(23) Making clear transitions within a paragraph (P) (24) Summarizing your points (P) (25) Emphasizing your points (P)

c. Be Consistent

(2) Choose words from same level of formality (W) (3) Avoid mixing common words with technical ones (W) (8) Keep tense the same in parallel structures (S) (9) Keep types of words the same (S) (10) Keep degrees of adjectives the same (S)(26) Avoid shifts in person (P)(27) Avoid shifts in number (P) (28) Avoid shifts in voice (P) (29) Avoid shifts in tense (P) (30) Avoid shifts in subject.(P)(31) Keep references, labels, measurement units same (P)

d. Avoid Distractions

(11) Avoid overly simple structures (S) (12) Avoid Perfect and Subjunctive tenses (S)(32) Avoid needless repetition of words (P)

2. PRINCIPLE OF DIRECTNESS

a. State what things are, not what they seem to be

(33) Use concrete terms (W) (34) Avoid lexical ambiguity (W) (36) State what things are, not what they seem to be (S) (37) Avoid syntactic ambiguity (S) (43) Avoid overstatement and exaggeration (P) (44) Separate fact from opinion (P)

b. State the subject clearly

(35) Avoid indirect and unspecific subject/object (W) (38) Reduce adverbial and adjectival phrases (S) (39) Using scope to avoid misplaced adverbs (S) (40) Avoid subject ambiguity: Use correct pronouns (S) (41) Avoid ambiguity: Use correct reflexive pronouns (S) (45) Avoid mixing subjects and objects up (P) (46) Focus on the message: Place writer in background (P)

c. Avoid negatives whenever possible

(42) Avoid negative expressions and double negatives (S) (48) Avoid spite and sarcasm (P) (49) Be direct, but not too direct (P)

d. State the “bottom line” succinctly

(47) Avoid developing ideas that you will dismiss later (P)

3. PRINCIPLE OF ECONOMY

a. Brief is best

(50) Use words you know (W) (54) Restrict length of sentences (S) (55) Keep sentences separate in ambiguous situations (S) (56) Avoid restatement and redundancy (S) (57) Avoid wordiness (S) (58) Use mainly nouns and verbs (S) (59) Avoid overuse and misuse of adjectives (S) (60) Avoid overuse and misuse of adverbs (S) (66) Underwrite, rather than overwrite (P) (67) Be brief and concise: Break writing up (P)

b. Common words are preferred over uncommon words

(51) Use common instead of uncommon words (W) (52) Define/Gloss new expressions (W)

(53) Avoid coining new words and phrases (W)

c. Avoid subordinate clauses

(61) Avoid reported speech (S)(62) Subordinate conjunctions ( who, which & that) (S) (63) Using when and while as conjunctions (S)

d. Discuss one point per statement

(64) Avoid run-on sentences (S) (65) Avoid unrelated ideas in the same sentence (S) (68) Develop your discussion one step at a time (P)

4. PRINCIPLE OF APPROPRIATENESS

a. Be truthful and show politeness and respect for others

(69) Use appropriate gender references (W)(70) Use neutral words (W) (73) Tell the truth (S)(74) Avoid sweeping generalizations and stereotyping (S)

(75) Avoid sexist, racist and prejudiced comments (S)(80) Use neutral tone: Avoid inference & implication (P)

b. Avoid idioms and slang, especially the more obscure regional variations

(71) Avoid colloquialism, clichés & slang (W)

c. Avoid contractions and casual speech rules

(72) Avoid uncommon contractions (W)

d. Use grammatically correct sentences

(76) Keep tense and number in agreement (S) (77) Choosing prepositions (S) (78) Avoid dangling modifiers (S)(79) Avoid Incomplete Sentences (S)

(W) refers to a rule primarily involved at the word level of usage.(S) refers to a rule primarily involved at the sentence level of usage.(P) refers to a rule primarily involved at the paragraph level of usage.

Appendix B - Suggested Reading List

The resources listed below are not endorsed by this author, or Babel, but are simplyoffered as possible resources for interested writers. All books and articles are maintained in theauthor's personal collection, and are deemed valuable for one reason or another by the author for thepurpose of writing English more effectively. Some of these resources are more appropriate fortechnical and scientific writing, while others are meant for the typical business worker. Some aremore geared towards the basic principles of Plain English while others are geared more towardshandling the basic aspects of English grammar. All however, played some part, large or small, indeveloping the concepts of this handbook, while at the same time, all rules, guidelines andobservations in this handbook are of course the original work of the author. Finally, I should saythat since the list below is from the author's personal collection, it is quite likely that some of thebooks are available in more recent editions than the ones cited here, and that some of the onlinelinks may no longer be active at the time of this reading. The list, therefore, is simply offered tosuggest the kinds of alternative resources that you might wish to consider in developing yourwriting skills for the purposes of technical and scientific writing.

Communicating in Science (2nd Edition)

1993. Booth, V. Cambridge University Press, Cambridge.

This is a short book that addresses both writing and speaking issues. It deals with the“micro” level of writing and preparing documents, going over issues such as title andkey words, summary, introduction, materials and methods, results, discussion,conclusion, and references. It deals primarily with usage issues, and goes into somedetail on proper pronoun usage, problems with spelling and punctuation, tense, voiceand a large range of other details.

Getting Technical: An introduction to technical writing

1994. Pippin Publishing Limited, Ontario.

Getting Technical is meant to be used as a learning text, and comes complete withexercises at the end of each section, with a useful answer key available at the end. Thebook covers all aspects of writing a technical report, covering style (passives versusactives, ambiguity, repetition, etc.) as well as how to write definitions, descriptions,explanations and instructions. It further covers report writing from the first outlinestages through all the main sections.

MLA Handbook for Writers of Research Papers (6th Edition)

2003. Gibaldi, J. The Modern Language Association of America, New York.

This is a very complete, and very popular, guide for writing many different types ofresearch papers. It covers topics from copyrights to plagiarism, and everything inbetween. It deals with the research stages before writing, the organizing of the report,and the writing of it. Much attention is given to how to cite sources appropriately, howto prepare the reference sheet, and so forth.

How to Write in Plain English

2003. Online <http://www.plainenglish.co.uk/>.

This is one of several guides available online through “The Plain English Campaign”that offer short, practical suggestions for writing in Plain English. This guide offerssuggestions for shortening sentences, choosing active verbs (over passives), targeting

the audience, and using positive language, among other things.

The Chicago Manual of Style (14th Edition)

1993. Grossman, J. (ed.), University of Chicago Press, Chicago.

This comprehensive book covers all aspects of writing, and is a suitable reference foranyone interested in publishing their works in journals, magazines and as stand alonebooks. Very thorough, the book is divided into three main parts; (1) bookmaking, (2)style, and (3) production and printing. The second part, on style, is perhaps the mostuseful for the average writer, containing guidelines for punctuation, spelling, numbers,abbreviations, and so forth. This is a reference guide, rather than an informed narrative.

The Complete Plain Words

1986. Gowers, E. Penguin Books, England.

This book covers quite a lot of territory on how to use English effectively within thecontext of Plain English. It covers many areas of usage including “correctness”,“avoiding the superfluous word”, “choosing the precise word”, “punctuation” and soforth. It is, however, somewhat wordy and obtuse in its own right, and originallywritten in 1948, may be inappropriate for some of today's writers.

The Elements of Style (2nd Edition)

1972. Strunk, W. & E. White. Macmillan Publishing Co, New York.

This is a very useful little handbook that has quite a well-deserved reputation forcovering many important aspects of writing clearly and correctly. It covers rules ofusage, composition and style; the latter of which are quite useful for understanding someof the basic concepts presented here in the form of Plain English.

The Elements of Technical Writing

1993. Blake, G. & R. Bly. Macmillan Publishing Company, New York.

This book provides a general overview for writing clearly and effectively within theframework of technical writing. While not devoted to the principles of Plain English, itnevertheless gives many useful suggestions on how to write numbers, equations, andother “non-English” symbols in appropriate ways, as well as covering topics such aspunctuation, grammar and abbreviations. A section on the principles of technicalcommunication covers many of the same topics we have discussed here, including usingthe active voice, avoiding elegant or complex language in terms of plain forms, deletingor limiting words, sentences and phrases that detract from the main message, and soforth.

The MIT Guide to Science and Engineering Communication

1998. Paradis, J. & M. Zimmerman. MIT Press, Cambridge, Massachusetts.

The MIT Guide contains an overview of all aspects of writing that a writer might comeacross in the sciences, including everything from writing memos, letters, and electronic

mail to proposals, reports, articles and even job-search related documents. Whilecomprehensive, it is clearly not focused on Plain English, nor is it really a “how-to”guide to writing. Instead, it is a detailed book of information that covers virtually allaspects of scientific writing, showing examples of each type. It would be particularlyuseful for those planning on doing research abroad, or in participating in internationalconferences. It is essentially an encyclopedia of formats useful for the scientist andengineer in writing in any context on their respective subjects.

The St. Martin's Handbook (3rd Edition)

1995. Lunsford, A. & R. Connors. St. Martin's Press, New York.

This handbook is similar to both the MLA guide, and to the Chicago Manual of Style. Itis very comprehensive, and in fact incorporates many examples from the MLAhandbook. It covers both academic and scientific writing issues, and offers moreexplanation than the other two guides. This is very useful for covering writing issues ofall types, though likely will not contain as many as the “micro” details of writing thatyou will find in the other two guides mentioned above in this list.

Scientific English

1995. Day, R. Oryx Press, Westport, CT.

This guide is based more on anecdotal, personal experiences than any of the othersmentioned here, and as such, has perhaps the least useful range of applications. It does,however, provide some practical insights into certain areas of scientific writing, andlooks at the task from a very simple and clear perspective. It deals with most of thethings we have discussed in this handbook, such as abbreviations, acronyms, problemsof voice, person and tense, ambiguity, sexism, and a range of other primarily word-usage issues.

Writing for FEMA

2003. Federal Emergency Management Agency.Online <http://www.plainlanguage.gov/hotstuff/fema_writing_manual.pdf>.

This is not an entirely useful or accessible document, developed by an agency of the USgovernment, but does provide some pairs of “bad” and “good” examples of governmentdocuments, where “bad” represents versions of text written in confusing text, and the“good” versions written in Plain English. Some familiar territory is covered, such as“eliminating wordiness”, “active voice”, “smothered verbs” and so forth.

Writing User-Friendly Documents

2003. Online <http://www.plainlanguage.gov/handbook/bigdocw.pdf>.

This is a general set of guidelines for writing government regulations in more naturallanguage forms. It covers many of the same issues we noted for Plain English, andprovides “bad” and “good” examples to illustrate many of its main points. The topicscovered include how to engage your readers, identify your audience, use the active

voice, set the appropriate tone, and so forth.

Appendix C - Reference GuideBasic steps for writing a research paper:

From conception to submission.

Overview

In this handbook we have reviewed several aspects of writing a research paper, primarily from thepoint of view of recognizing some of the more common errors, and how to correct them, using thesystem of Plain English. During the course of our discussion we covered most of the importantsections that comprise a research paper, including the title, the abstract, the key word list, theintroduction, the main body and the conclusion. There is of course more to the writing of a researchpaper than just writing these sections. In fact, we can divide the basic steps for writing a researchpaper into three basic stages: (A) Pre-writing (planning and preparation); (B) Writing (realization),and; (C) Post-writing (revision). In the following few pages, I will briefly cover all of the steps ineach of the three stages. By understanding what these basic steps are, and the order that they follow,and in some cases the time that they require, the writer will be better prepared to write a researchpaper that will be successfully published and read.

A. Pre-Writing: Preparation

There are five or six steps in this first stage of writing a research paper. It is impossible to put a timeestimate on how long it might take to complete this stage, but it is useful to understand the steps thatmust be covered. Recall from the first chapter that there are two basic types of research papers: (1)the report of an actual experiment (primary research), and; (2) a literature review (secondaryresearch). In the case of a literature review the writer will not undertake an actual experiment, sowill skip step 4 in this stage, while a writer who is reporting on the findings of an actual experimentwill naturally include this step. (See Section 1.2.)

Step 1. Determine primary area of interest

The primary area of interest is usually clear from the start. This refers to the writer’sspecific area of expertise. The only reason that there might be a question here is if the writer hasmore than one specified field of expertise. For example, an investigator may be equally skilled inelectrical engineering and in computer programming. In this case a choice would be made in regardto which area of expertise the writer will address, which will in turn have an impact on the targetaudience, the degree of formality, the choice of field-specific vocabulary, the context of thediscussion, and so forth. Even for those of us with a single area of expertise, we still must resolvemany of these same questions; we must determine who the audience is, the level of the expertise,why we are writing, and so forth. (See Sections 1.3 - 1.6.)

Step 2. Formulate a scientific hypothesis

Every research paper searches for an answer to some sort of scientific question. This isusually articulated in the form of a hypothesis. To do this, the investigator first thinks of a generalstatement, or law, that applies to a certain phenomenon in the writer’s field of expertise. Forexample, a general medical doctor might determine that “apples are healthy”. The next step is toturn this statement into a question that can be investigated. For our statement on apples, we would

have something like “Are apples healthy?” This is still quite primitive, and would be furtherrefined, since it is open to a wide range of variables, such as the type of apples, the definition of“healthy”, the amount one must ingest, the actual improvements or benefits, and so forth. Likely,we would expect a much more specific question such as “what are the effects of Vitamin A obtainedfrom ‘granny smith’ apples on the heart rates of laboratory rats?” We need to go one step further,however. Once we have determined the basic question we wish to investigate, we also want toformulate a guess, or hypothesis, about the likely answer to such a question. This is usually wordedas a thesis statement, and tells the reader both your main topic, and your point of view. In the caseof apples, then, we could have the following statement: “Vitamin A from ‘granny smith’ applesreduces the heart rates of laboratory rats.” This question, or statement, serves as the guiding point,or research topic, for the rest of the investigation. (See Sections 1.2, 1.3.)

Step 3. Review relevant literature

This step refers to the reading of all relevant materials available on your chosen researchtopic. For those doing a “literature review” type of paper, this comprises the investigation itself. For those doing an “investigative report”, this provides a foundation for the research plan that willbe enacted in the next step. In both cases, it is usually impossible to read every book or article onthe subject, and therefore should be a survey of the most important, influential and representativesources available. As a result of this synthesis of existing materials, the investigator usually tries tocome up with novel insights, or perspectives, which will form the basis of the new report, and/orexperimental investigation. (See Section 1.2.)

Step 4. Develop and pursue the experimental analysis

In this step the actual experiment takes place. Naturally, however, it is skipped by the writerconducting a literature review. In the case of an experiment, the investigation may be one completeand solitary experiment, or it may be one part of a much more complex investigation. This step mayconsume a great deal of the researcher’s time, and because of this, no timeline has been suggestedfor the entire stage.

Step 5. Outline the paper

We did not cover the outlining of a paper in this handbook, with the exception of providing arough breakdown of the major sections of a typical research paper. Nevertheless, it is essential tomake a plan, or outline, before you begin to write your paper. This will help you recognize whetheryour preliminary research was complete, adequate and balanced. As a result of developing anoutline, the writer may notice that certain aspects of the investigation are incomplete, missing, orout of place. If deficiencies are detected, they can then be corrected in the next step. (See Section1.2.)

Step 6. Fill in the gaps

This is a repair step that provides an opportunity for the investigator to go back and consideradditional resources, pursue alternative experimental protocols, and so forth. Often this step isoverlooked. Investigators are sometimes in a hurry to move forward with what they have covered upto this point, and simply ignore the need to go back and make sure that all questions have beenresolved. We suggest that this is a good point in the paper development process, coming at the endof the pre-writing stage, to reconsider the overall initiatives of the paper, and whether all relevantaspects have been given appropriate consideration.

B. Writing: Realization

In the main body of the handbook we have covered most of the steps in this stage of theresearch paper’s development, so will only cover the “realization” steps very briefly here. Again, itis impossible to suggest a basic timeline for completion of this stage, since the speed ofdevelopment is solely up to the discretion of the writer.

Step 7. Write the introduction

This is the usual starting paper for any paper. It should contain the main thesis statement,and introduce to the reader the scientific hypothesis that is being investigated. It should alsoprovide a brief history to the problem under investigation, as well a short overview of the entirepaper, including reference to its major findings. (See Sections 2.4-2.7.)

Step 8. Write the main body

The main body of the paper constitutes most of the research paper. What is covered heredepends upon what type of research paper is being written (a literature review, or a report on anexperiment) which will determine whether there will be sections on methods, analysis, results, andso forth, or not (all found in the experiment-based paper). Both types of papers will usually includein the main body of the discussion, at a minimum, sections on the background or history of theproblem, a discussion of the relevant literature, and a presentation of some novel suggestions ordiscoveries. (See Sections 1.2 and Chapter 3.)

Step 9. Write the conclusion

Throughout the whole writing process, it is useful to keep the conclusion in mind. Byrecognizing the overall purpose of the paper, you will remain focused and directed towards arecognizable conclusion. The conclusion itself should summarize the main points of the paper,suggest possible areas of future investigation, and highlight any new or unique discoveries that weredeveloped in the paper. (See Chapter 4.)

Step 10. Write the abstract, the key word list, and anything else remaining

After the paper has been finished, there remain a few text portions that must be written. These include the abstract, which provides a summary of the entire paper, including its conclusions,the title, the key word list, and the reference list. You might also write a personal bibliography, ifrequired, as well as an acknowledgment page (though this last item is often completed after severalsteps have been completed in the post-writing stage). (See Sections 2.1-2.3.)

C. Post-writing: Revision

This stage was covered in Chapter 5, so it will be only briefly reviewed here. In this thirdand final stage of research paper development, the writer is encouraged to check and revise thepaper so that it is free of errors in both form and content. Here, we suggest that you set aside aboutone month to complete this stage of development. So, in plotting out the development of a researchpaper, build into your plan a completion date of the second stage, the “Writing” stage, at least onemonth ahead of the final submission deadline.

Step 11. Self-edit

As discussed in this handbook, it is important to be able to discover and correct your own

errors. Though this is difficult, it is a skill that you can develop. This requires the ability todistance yourself from your own writing, which sometimes is made easier by simply setting asidethe text for a period of time before looking it over carefully and critically. Minimally, this step willtake two to three days. (See Section 5.1.)

Step 12. Colleague-check

Once you are sure you have done as much as you can with your paper, then it is very usefulto have one or two of your colleagues look it over for errors in both content and form. Ultimately itwill be your choice whether to include any or all of their suggestions, but it is always useful to getsome sort of feedback, so you are aware of any possible weaknesses, and still have some time leftbefore submission to correct them. Depending upon schedules and workloads, it is usuallyadvisable to set aside a week to ten days for this step. (See Section 5.2.)

Step 13. Revise/Rewrite

After you have obtained your paper back from your colleagues, then you should make anycorrections that you deem necessary. Sometimes a colleague has pointed out a major deficiency thatcannot be adequately repaired without changing the paper significantly. In this case, you maychoose to ignore it, and go on to the next step. Alternatively, you might try to address the problemby adding a footnote that indicates that you are aware of the problem, but feel that the present studyhas other merits that outweigh the deficiency. In these cases the investigator often suggests thatsuch problems will be targeted in future research. Baring major deficiencies, however, yourrevisions should not take more than two to three days to complete. (See Section 5.3.)

Step 14. Native check

Since this handbook addresses the research paper written in English by a foreign writer, it isalways advisable to have a native English speaker read your paper, to correct any mistakes ofspelling, grammar and usage. The person performing the native check should be a college-educatedspeaker, familiar with academic publications, but does not necessarily need to be an investigator inyour particular field of study. Since the check is not focused on content, it can usually be conductedrather quickly, though you should probably allow between five to seven days for completion. (SeeSection 5.4.)

Step 15. Revise/Rewrite

Every time someone reviews and comments on your paper, you will need to go through itagain and make changes as necessary. Each time, though, this will take less time, since the paperwill naturally be improved at each step, and will therefore require fewer repairs as the processmoves along. This will likely only take two or three days at most. At this juncture, if you havemade several major repairs, you might want to repeat some of the earlier steps in this stage, andonce again have a colleague look at the revised paper, making any additional changes as necessary,and further, have a native speaker take one more glance at the “finished” work, followed by makingany final repairs that you see fit. This would naturally add another week or more to the process. (See Section 5.3.)

Step 16. Package/submit

Once you are satisfied that you have made as many improvements to the paper as youpossibly can, then it is time to put it into the final format required by the target journal. This mayrequire making multiple copies, cover sheets, identification cards and so forth. Once the package isassembled, make a basic set for yourself, and send the package off. Of course, the journal may later

ask you to make some changes, which might require you to repeat some of the steps in this post-writing stage. The actual packaging and submission of your paper shouldn’t take more than a day ortwo. (See Section 5.5.)


Recommended