TWO SKETCHES FOR

STUPENDOUS

by

Jake Brinksman

Jake Brinksman

72 Forshaw Street

Warrington

WA2 7HD

brinko3@hotmail.co.uk

INT. NORTH POLE, OFFICE OF SANTA CLAUS - NIGHT

FADE IN:

1. M.C.U., HIGH ANGLE of SANTA CLAUS, seemingly bored reading hundreds of mail.

2. C.U, EYE-LEVEL of flirtatious pink letter from a Mystery Sender. Santa Claus opens and reads this letter intriguingly, he smiles deviously.

3. M.S, CAMERA PANS DOWN as Santa Claus gives the letter to an ELF who looks confused.

4. C.U., EYE LEVEL of Santa Claus as he kneels down to the Elf's height.

SANTA CLAUS

Go and hide this, go and hide it quickly.

5. M.C.U., HIGH ANGLE of the Elf as he nods eagerly obeying his masters request. CAMERA PANS as he scurries away through the house.

INT. NORTH POLE, BEDROOM OF SANTA CLAUS AND MRS CLAUS - NIGHT

6. M.L.S., HIGH ANGLE of the Elf as he scurries into the bedroom and hides the letter in Santa Claus' top draw.

7. C.U EYE LEVEL as he gives a smile of satisfaction.

INT. NORTH POLE, OFFICE OF SANTA CLAUS - NIGHT

8. M.S., EYE-LEVEL of Santa Claus as he sits down at his desk and begins writing a reply to the Mystery Sender. CAMERA PANS as Santa Claus still smiling deviously stands, seals the letter and delivers it in the outgoing mail letterbox.

(CONTINUED)

9. M.L.S LOW ANGLE of Santa Claus who turns and walks with a swagger into the living room. He kicks his heels along the way.

FADE OUT:

FADE IN:

A MONTAGE follows of Santa Claus.

10. C.U of Santa Claus reading the pink mystery letters.

11. M.C.U of Santa Claus replying to the Mystery Sender.

12. M.S of the Elf hiding all of the Mystery Senders letters in the top draw of Santa Claus' bedroom.

FADE OUT:

EXT. NORTH POLE, OUTSIDE THE HOME OF SANTA CLAUS AND MRS CLAUS - DAY

FADE IN:

13. L.S., EYE LEVEL of the POSTMAN as he walks up the drive to deliver the sack full of mail. He is intercepted by Santa Claus rushing out of his front door.

SANTA CLAUS

Ho Ho Ho Mr POSTMAN, don't worry, I'll take that mail.

POSTMAN

Ok Mr CLAUS, have a nice day sir.

14. M.C.U., EYE-LEVEL of Santa Claus as he turns quickly and rushes into the house.

INT. NORTH POLE, LIVING ROOM OF SANTA CLAUS AND MRS CLAUS - DAY

(CONTINUED)

15. M.L.S., HIGH ANGLE of Santa Claus quickly rushing through the room in excitement to read the mail and CAMERA PANS DOWN when Santa Claus trips over the Elf and tumbles to ground.

SANTA CLAUS

Watch where you're going!

16. TWO SHOT, HIGH ANGLE of the Elf who looks displeasing at Santa Claus and folds his arms in disgust. Santa Claus continues to rush through to his office.

INT. NORTH POLE, THE OFFICE OF SANTA CLAUS - DAY

17. C.U., CAMERA TRACKS UP as Santa Claus empties the sack full of mail on his desk and immediately begins searching furiously for a pink letter from his admirer. Santa Claus finds the pink letter and begins reading it frantically.

18. L.S., EYE LEVEL POV of the stairs which Santa Claus hears his wife MRS CLAUS coming down.

19. M.S., EYE-LEVEL of him as he is frantically trying to hide the letter. CAMERA PANS as he is rushing around the different parts of the room trying to hide the letter. He turns and sees the Elf stood by the door, still displeased from Santa Claus tripping over him. CAMERA PANS as Santa Claus walks over quickly to the Elf and gestures to the Elf to go and find a hiding place for the letter.

SANTA CLAUS

Go and hide this, hide it quick.

20. M.S LOW ANGLE of Mrs Claus who comes down stairs and interrupts the conversation, the ELF hides the letter behind his back. CAMERA PANS UP AND FOLLOWS the Elf as he scurries upstairs past MRS CLAUS.

(CONTINUED)

MRS CLAUS

Watch where you're going Elf.

21. C.U., of Santa Claus' face who smiles innocently to his wife.

FADE OUT:

FADE IN

INT. NORTH POLE - THE BEDROOM OF SANTA CLAUS AND MRS CLAUS - DAY

22. C.U. of Santa Claus face waking up.

23. M.S., CAMERA PANS as Santa Claus sneaks out of the room ensuring he does not wake Mrs Claus up.

24. A MONTAGE follows of him getting smartly dressed to go out.

25. C.U. of him combing his beard. Brushing his hair and dusting his coat.

EXT. NORTH POLE, FRONT GARDEN OF SANTA CLAUS AND MRS CLAUS - DAY

26. M.L.S CAMERA TRACKS ALONG as Santa Claus struts down the path to his sled and takes off.

FADE OUT:

EXT. TERRACE STREET - NIGHT

FADE IN:

27. M.L.S of Santa Claus getting off the sled and reading the address on the letter off his Mystery Sender.

28. M.C.U. as he looks up at a house, he smiles and CAMERA TRACKS as he heads to the front door.

29. P.O.V shot from Santa Claus at a message on the door saying "Come in and close the door behind you xx".

(CONTINUED)

INT. MYSTERY SENDER'S LIVING ROOM - DAY

30. M.S EYE-LEVEL of Santa Claus walking through the door of the Mystery Sender's house.

31. P.O.V CAMERA PANS AROUND THE ROOM a very decorative room. A large Christmas tree in the corner with several presents underneath it and hundreds of Santa Claus and other Christmas photographs surrounding the walls.

32. M.C.U. of the door closing behind Santa Claus and him looking very confused and trying to open the front door without success. CAMERA PANS QUICKLY across the room where the MYSTERY SENDER walks in from another room. A hairy overweight 30 year old man, not the kind Santa Claus was expecting.

MYSTERY SENDER

Santa baby, Santa baby, slip a sable under the tree for me.

SANTA CLAUS

AAaarrgghhh!

SANTA BABY TRACK PLAYS FOR THE REST OF THE SCENE

FADE OUT:

FADE IN:

INT. DRIVING TEST CENTRE - DAY

33. M.L.S Of a timid nervous teenager with curly blonde hair and large bold glasses called SIMON sitting down. He is wearing homemade clothes stitched by his GRANDMA sitting next to him. She is a gentle old lady who is knitting a hat rapidly. On the other side of Simon is his driving instructor MR DEANS with his silver hair slicked back wearing a smart shirt, braces and a bow tie. Grandma leans over towards Simon.

(CONTINUED)

GRANDMA

Don't worry Simon you'll be fine, just remember what MR DEANS taught you and you can't fail.

34. M.C.U of Grandma as she carries on knitting frantically whilst Simon leans down with his head down and thumbs twitching. Mr Deans pats Simon on the leg.

MR DEANS

You'll be fine boy, you're a natural.

35. C.U of Simon who lifts his head and looks at Mr Deans with a small smile of hope.

36. M.L.S LOW ANGLE at a door in front of them which flies open.

37. P.O.V CAMERA TILTS UP at a very tall highly muscular black man named CLEVELAND who is stood there filling the door frame. CAMERA PANS AROUND AND ZOOMS IN RAPIDLY on Simon's stunned face as he studies the man.

CLEVELAND

Hello son, my names Cleveland, I'll be yo examiner today.

38. M.S as Simon stays sat by the safety of his Grandma stunned by the presence of Cleveland. His Grandma nudges him, encouraging him to stand up.

GRANDMA(Nervously)

Go on Simon, don't forget your manners.

(CONTINUED)

39. TWO SHOT as Cleveland grabs Simon's hand and pulls him up with some great force. Simon flies up and hits Cleveland's solid chest. His glasses fall on the floor.

CLEVELAND

Hehehe, I'm sorry about that son, sometimes I just don't know my own strength.

40. M.C.U. CAMERA PEDS UP as Cleveland hands Simon his glasses which he accepts nervously.

SIMON

Thats ok, it's nice to meet you Mr Cleveland.

CLEVELAND

That's the attitude son. Come on It'll all be fine I'm sure.

41. L.S as the two walk out the door with Cleveland towering over Simon and patting Simon on the head.

FADE OUT:

FADE IN:

INT. SMALL HATCHBACK CAR INTERIOR - DAY

42. TWO SHOT of Simon driving down a busy and congested main road he is sat very low in his seat whilst Cleveland in the passenger seat is almost touching the roof of the car. Cleveland spots something out of the window.

CLEVELAND

STOP THE CAR!

43. TWO SHOT of inside of the car as they grind to a halt. Cleveland winds the window down.

(CONTINUED)

44. M.C.U. as Cleveland slides the top half of his body out of the window. Simon sits nervously looking around for any faults he may have made.

CLEVELAND

Yo DETROIT, JACKSON Yo Dawgs.

45. L.S of two other large black men Detroit and Jackson who are the same size and build as Cleveland.

DETROIT

YO guys, what up?

CLEVELAND

Sound bro, fancy coming for a ride.

JACKSON

Yeah dawg, sounds like a plan.

46. TWO SHOT as Cleveland turns and slides back through the window into the car. Shortly after Jackson and Detroit get in the back. Simon looks around scared, as he is surrounded by these 3 giant men.

CLEVELAND

On with the test we go son.

47. TWO SHOT WITH A WIDE DEPTH OF FIELD. of inside the car as Simon sets off and continues driving.

INT. SMALL HATCHBACK CAR INTERIOR - DAY

48. P.O.V as the car stops further down the street at a set of traffic lights behind another car. Three attractive YOUNG WOMEN in their 20's cross the road.

(CONTINUED)

49. TWO SHOT WITH A WIDE DEPTH OF FIELD As the four men's eyes follow the 3 young attractive girls across the road.

50. P.O.V showing the lights changing. Simon panics releases the clutch too quickly and crashes into the car in front.

51. M.S. as Cleveland opens the passenger door and begins to get out of the car.

52. P.O.V as a FEMALE DRIVER whose arms are covered in tattoos, stocky build and thick curly hair gets out of the car in front and begins to approach the car angrily.

FEMALE DRIVER

What the hell have you done to my car? You're going to pay for that.

53. TWO SHOT WITH A WIDE DEPTH OF FIELD as Cleveland closes the door rapidly and Cleveland, Detroit and Jackson all begin to panic.

CLEVELAND, DETROIT AND JACKSON

AAARGGHH ITS HER!

54. Simon stunned pauses for a moment before driving off rapidly.

55. L.S of the car driving past the car in front and swerving several cars along the way. TWO SHOT WITH A WIDE DEPTH OF FIELD as he's panicking driving wildly with the car turning down several side streets.

SIMON

What's going on, why didn't I just stop?

(CONTINUED)

CLEVELAND

SIMON my son, when you meet a woman like that you fear for your life. Trust me, I know, I was married to her!

56. C.U of Simon as he glances at Cleveland, still very scared.

57. P.O.V shot of the road shows Simon losing control and crashing into a nearby tree.

58. TWO SHOT WITH A WIDE DEPTH OF FIELD of the four of them crashing and the seatbelts saving them. The airbag deploys.

DETROIT

Guys we gotta scoot, before that crazy bitch gets here.

CLEVELAND

Good shout, lets bail.

59. TWO SHOT WITH A WIDE DEPTH OF FIELD Of Cleveland, Detroit and Jackson opening the doors and running away in different directions.

60. L.S of the car they crashed into earlier screeching around the corner and braking harshly next to Simon's car.

61. P.O.V from Simon as the woman gets out of the car and walks slowly towards Simon slowly with an angry frown on her face.

SIMON

Uh....oh!

FADE OUT: