Sport magazine - Issue 285

Issue 285 | December 7 2012

My turnMonty Panesar is back in the action

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ISSUE 285, DECEMBER 7 2012

Radar

06 Sexy managers You’ll never look at Jol, Wenger or Mancini in the same way

08 Champion idea? The good and the bad of Michel Platini’s suggested Champions League expansion

10 Warrior Skreamers Because, it seems, Marouane Fellaini can score wearing anything at the moment o this coming weekFeatures

16 Monty Panesar England’s once-forgotten man tells us exclusively about his record-breaking Test return

27 Keeping the faith Jonathan Wilson’s new book takes us through a century of goalkeeping evolution

35 Louis Smith Britain’s most famous gymnast- come-dancer talks Strictly fame, London and looks ahead to Rio 43 The Christmas Gift Guide A team of curiously cheery elves and a jolly old git overseeing it all. Sport has worked hard this year

Extra Time

72 Grooming A bunch of new products for your head, and a new head for your gob. It all makes sense, eventually

74 Ludivine Sagna Wife of Arsenal’s Bacary is a “very proud wife”. We’re sure her husband feels the same 76 Winter sports Skiing single: we bring you the best trips for lone travellers

78 Entertainment Gizmo and his evil siblings make their way back into cinemas in Gremlins. Pass the popcorn...

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ive-thousand-year-old cave paintings

found in Norway depict a primitive skier

with just one pole, and no apres-ski

chalet to warm up in after a session on the

slopes. Luckily, both the art of skiing and skiiing

art have progressed significantly since ancient

times, as evidenced by this newly released

collection of vintage ski posters, which are

available for sale as originals or prints.

originalskiposters.com

Radar p08 – The pros and cons of a 64-team Champions League

p06 – Sexy Premier League managers. Yes, really

p10 – Marouane Fellaini’s new boots skream blue murder

F

| December 7 2012 | 05

Snow

business

Smarter scrums

06 | December 7 2012 |

Radar

One for the ladies

ver the past six and a bit years,

we have taken a fair bit of stick

for not catering enough for our

female readers. Well, we were listening –

so here’s Fulham manager Martin Jol in full

Baywatch regalia (just look at his face).

This image comes from the Sexy Managers

Calendar 2013 by illustrator James

Husbands. It features 12 drawings of your

favourite head coaches in risque settings,

including Alex Ferguson and Kenny Dalglish

re-enacting the pottery scene from Ghost

– an image we will carry with us to our

grave. Mercifully there’s nothing depicting

Big Sam Allardyce ‘pumping it in the mixer’.

£10, giftscardspresents.com

O

ugby is often called a gentleman’s game, with its

roots in the public school system and its long

and proud amateur tradition. And, of course,

what could be more gentlemanly than marrying into the

royal family, popping a blood capsule in your mouth, or

throwing a dwarf across an Antipodean bar?

Well, new England kit maker Canterbury has released

its 1871 collection of lifestyle clothing, inspired by the

very first shirts worn by England in – you guessed it

– 1871. The collection harks back to the days when rugby

was a sport played by genuine gentlemen (in between

rounds of dwarf-tossing, probably), with genuine

moustaches that hadn’t just been grown for charity.

A limited-edition run of the 1871 collection is available

now, from £30 for T-shirts to £100 for rugby shirts.

canterbury.com

R

08 | December 7 2012 |

Radar

hould UEFA expand the Champions League to

64 teams, as Michel Platini has suggested, or

will it simply dilute the competition’s quality?

Europa’s final countdownThe expansion of the Champions League would

mean the end of the little-loved Europa League,

which is largely considered a hassle, certainly

by managers of British teams. It also means

we can go back to having absolutely no reason

whatsoever to flick to Channel 5. Bliss.

BUTFulham’s run to the Europa League final was one

of the most memorable seasons in the club’s

history. Would fans of teams such as Everton

and Fulham really trade that in for a place in

a competition in which they have little chance

of getting out of the group stage?

Big-gun bonanzaThe knockout rounds would be vastly improved by

a 64-team Champions League, because all the

biggest teams in Europe would be represented,

instead of half being segregated into the Europa

League. Lets face it, Liverpool v Lazio is a much

tastier proposition than (with the greatest of

respect) Basel v Shakhtar Donetsk, and should

be recognised as such.

BUTThe group stages would become even more

one-sided. There have been some shocks this

year, but say goodbye to groups of death –

because teams would be seeded, the likes of

Manchester United and Barcelona will find

themselves in even easier groups, reducing the

interest in a group stage that already struggles

to hold the attention at times.

Domestic effectsHaving seven English teams in the Champions

League could, in theory, narrow the gap between

the Big Four (whoever that now is) and the rest,

especially if those teams manage to qualify for the

group stage proper. It’ll also give mid-table clubs

more to play for in the latter stages of the season.

BUTIncreasing the number of qualifiers to seven would

give the big clubs much more leeway – teams such

as Arsenal, who are never realistically going to

finish outside of the top seven (current position:

10th), would be able to relax completely once they

were out of the title race, which could take the

sting out of end-of-season clashes between the

bigger sides. It also runs the risk of creating a

new gap, between the top seven and the rest.

What do you think? Let us know @sportmaguk

o you have a relative you really hate?

Do they love sport? If so, you’re in

luck this Christmas, because we

seem to have entered a golden age for horrific

merchandise – the rise in commercialism

within sport combined with an alarming drop in

taste has created a perfect storm for all things

sporty and horrendous.

Take this Stadium Shirt (pictured, £40 from

store.liverpoolfc.tv), for example – a great way

to ensure the unlucky Liverpool fan in your

family is given a wide berth by everyone.

The Merseysiders aren’t the only culprits -

West Ham have a range of bobble head

figurines including chairmen David Gold and

David Sullivan (£12, officialwesthamstore.com).

And golfers can enjoy (if that’s the word)

a truly frightening Ian Poulter headcover for

their clubs (£19, thegolfshoponline.co.uk).

All because embarrassing your loved ones

is what Christmas is all about.

S

D

When I’m 64

You’ll alwayswalk alone

10 | December 7 2012 |

Radar

No balls, please

Beastlyboots

ittingly, these rather striking

new boots are worn by

Marouane Fellaini – one of the

most striking figures on most football

pitches, thanks to a buoyant haircut

straight out of the Jackson Five. Fellaini

debuted his new boots, the Warrior

Skreamer Pro FG 360s, against Man

City last weekend, and they had as much

of an impact on the match as they did on

the eyes of those watching: the Belgian

scored Everton’s opener with his new

clogs, but then conceded the penalty

that allowed City to equalise. The

Skreamers are packed with scarily

named innovative features (MurderHole

Cutouts, anyone?) to improve power,

speed and accuracy. We’re just amazed

the shampoo manufacturers didn’t get

to Fellaini first – he’s definitely worth it.

warriorfootball.com

F

e were quite shocked to find out

that the huge rivalry between

Manchester neighbours United and

City wasn’t manufactured three years ago

for the purposes of boosting Sky’s ratings.

Apparently it’s been going on for 131 years,

with this weekend’s clash the 164th meeting.

In The Battle for Manchester, Jon Reeves

tells the story, from Denis Law’s backheel to

relegate United through to Michael Owen’s

last-minute winner in that 4-3, and beyond.

The Battle for Manchester, out now, £16.99

rguably the hardest part of growing up is the

slow, painful realisation that you’re probably

never going to be able to fit a game of table

football in your living room. And that, even if you could,

whoever you’ve chosen to live with probably isn’t going

to embrace the idea with as much enthusiasm as you.

Don’t worry, though. Because as long as you have an

iPad, you can now recreate all the fun of your local pub,

your childhood youth club, or a trendy Shoreditch bar.

New Potato’s Classic Match Foosball is an iPad dock with

eight two-axis control bars. In conjunction with a bespoke

app, you can play table football, foosball, baby-foot or

footzy (all the same) until you have repetitive strain injury.

The app includes some genuine improvements on

regular table football to make up for the fact that you

can’t exactly rest your pint on it. In addition to realistic

game sounds when you kick the ball or score, there are

crowd noises, tournament rules and – quite brilliantly

– 3D instant replays. Even Alan Shearer could analyse that.

$100, newpotatotech.com

W

A

A city divided

12 | December 7 2012 |

Radar Editor’s letter

Editor-in-chief

Simon Caney

@simoncaney

Sport magazine

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Editor-in-chief: Simon Caney (7951)

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Staff writers: Mark Coughlan (7901),

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Contributors: Mark Richardson, Martin

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© UTV Media plc 2012

UTV Media plc takes no responsibility for

the content of advertisements placed in

Sport magazine

£1 where sold

Hearty thanks to: Gab Stone, Anthony

Minoprio and all who helped compile our

Christmas gift guide, notably Santa Claus

Don’t forget: Help keep public transport clean and tidy for everyone by taking your copy of Sport away with you when you leave the bus or train.

LAUNCH OFTHE YEAR

2008

Total Average Distribution: 305,676 Jan-Jun 2012

www.sport-magazine.co.uk

@sportmaguk

facebook.com/sportmagazine

T hey were dancing in the streets

of leafy southwest London,

or at least clinking glasses of

expensive sparkling wine, on

Saturday night – and nobody

can begrudge them.

England produced a famous, and

comprehensive, victory over the All Blacks

that – at least in the record books – goes

down as one of their best ever wins. It was

the second-heaviest defeat that New

Zealand have ever suffered (a remarkable

fact in itself, that says much about just how

good this team has always been).

But before anyone gets too carried away,

it’s worth pointing out that – on paper, at

least – this was not a competitive game.

And the All Blacks have had a long, arduous

year, which became quite obvious as the

game wore on at Twickenham.

So while maybe Stuart Lancaster is on to

something, this should just be the start of

the road that leads to the World Cup in 2015,

the draw for which was done this week –

a tad prematurely.

England have some very fine players at

their disposal, but this has been the case for

some years now. Yet still, by and large, they

can’t compete with the teams from the

southern hemisphere. Or, come to that,

with some of the teams from the northern

hemisphere. England do not equal the sum

of their parts.

Martin Johnson could not corral them into

a cohesive unit and, while Lancaster has

made positive strides, it’s worth reminding

ourselves that England have lost to both

Australia and South Africa in recent weeks.

The coach himself said, with typical

pragmatism, that he was not getting carried

away by one result. And nor should we.

Next up is the Six Nations. And my Welsh

friends feel they have a point to prove. I hate

it when that happens.

Farewell, then, to Ricky Ponting, who departs the Test cricket arena after a wonderful career (see overleaf). I can’t distinguish between him, Sachin Tendulkar and Brian Lara when it comes to picking the finest batsman of the modern era. Ponting was for many years the most prized Australian wicket in a team that was packed full of talent, and world cricket is poorer without him (certainly Australia are). Now is also time, I’d respectfully suggest, for Tendulkar to stand aside. Even the greatest players can’t compete with the onset of age.

Much wailing and gnashing of teeth over

the changes that are taking place to the

hallowed Old Course at St Andrews.

They are happening to make it more of

a challenge to professionals without, it

seems, a moment’s thought to everyone

else who is lucky enough to play there.

It’s too late to stop the diggers now, but

it really is a terrible shame.

The first building blockEngland have renewed confidence after victory over the All Blacks, but it’s only the start

Download the free Sport iPad app from the Apple Newsstand

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Swallowing in: Chris

Ashton enjoys his try

against the All Blacks

Reader comments of the week

@simoncaney pretty sure

there are bigger issues

than Ian Poulter in the

news this week!

@twhittock

Twitter

@sportmaguk

@simoncaney Agree fully!

Performance Ian Poulter

displayed in the Ryder

was amazing & deserves

inclusion

#clutchperformance

@andlesland

Twitter

@simoncaney

@sportmaguk could not

agree more with your

article Re

@IanJamesPoulter and

the best ever Ryder Cup

performance #SPOTY

@GonzoRD77

Twitter

Agreed @simoncaney

re @IanJamesPoulter.

Not sure who he

should replace, but a

performance as inspiring

as anything I saw at the

Olympics.

@stephenpenson

Twitter

@simoncaney do you

honestly think Poulter

should be nominated for

SPOTY over Rory McIlroy?

@lewis_lake

Twitter

Free iPad app available on Newsstand

Cover of the Year

14 | December 7 2012 |

Frozen in time

| 15

Punter bows outRicky Ponting was the central character in one of our

all-time favourite cricketing moments: that run-out

in 2005. After England sub fielder Gary Pratt

(where is he now?) threw down Ponting’s stumps at

Trent Bridge, the Aussie skipper stormed off in a

complete rage. It was a rage he then unleashed on

England coach Duncan Fletcher, claiming the effing

Poms were effing using effing specialist effing sub

effing fielders just so their effing bowlers could

have an effing rest. It was a pivotal moment in

a classic series. This week Ponting, one of the

all-time greats, left the Test arena for the final

time. Bye, Ricky. We loved you really.Ca

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16 | December 7 2012 |

Monty Panesar

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After a 30-month absence from the England team, Monty Panesar has in 2012 been

reborn as a Test cricketer. In an exclusive interview with Sport, he looks back on

his time in the wilderness and reveals the reasons behind his renaissance >

SECOND COMING

18 | December 7 2012 |

Monty Panesar


Panesar celebrated what he told

SPORT is “probably my best ever

Test wicket” in traditional fashion.

He hared off, eyes wide, high-fiving teammates

visible and invisible as he went. It isn’t

this moment, however, that illustrates the

changes that Monty Panesar has undergone.

Instead, pick one of Panesar’s six wickets

in the second innings and see his reaction

there. The look of wild surprise, as if a wicket

was the last outcome he expected when

the ball left his hand, has been dialled down.

It has instead been replaced by a grin and

a big round of applause. Well, he has earned

it. This is a man who has spent two and a

half years in the international wilderness,

returning in 2012 more confident, more

aware, more controlled. All this without losing

any of the boyish enthusiasm that made him

a cult hero to England supporters. Not that

his rejuvenation has been easy.

COMEBACK DOWN UNDER“I’ve had ups and downs,” Panesar told us

when we spoke to him in the aftermath of

England’s stunning second Test victory in

Mumbai. “During that time away [from the

Test team], some people questioned my

cricket. They regarded me as a luxury player,

because I’m far from the world’s best batter Cre

dit

or fielder, despite my effort and improvement

there. But I believe that in first-class and Test

cricket, you’ve got to pick quality bowlers if

you want – on a regular basis – to take the

20 wickets needed to win matches.”

Despite an heroic batting display in the

final Test before his 29-match absence – the

last-wicket stand with James Anderson that

helped England salvage an unlikely draw with

Australia in the 2009 Ashes – Panesar was in

poor bowling form at the time. The solution

was soon clear to him.

“I decided to go back to basics and work on

my strengths as a bowler,” he says. “I wanted

to get better at what I do best, rather than

trying to become something that I’m not.”

As part of this process, he decided to move

from Northamptonshire to Division One county

Sussex, where he took on the “responsibility

of being the leader of the attack”. In the 2011

county season, Panesar topped the Division

One bowling table with 69 wickets.

He also made the decision to travel to

Australia and play Sydney Grade Cricket last

winter. “The fans were really hospitable,“ he

says of his time down under. “They gave me a

bit of stick for being a Pommie, but in a nice

way. I still had a laugh with them. Obviously

the cricket was great, but I enjoyed the whole

experience out there. Singing with the Mike

Whitney Band was good fun as well.” >

ON THE MORNING OF HIS FIRST MATCH IN THE INDIA VERSUS ENGLAND TEST SERIES, MONTY PANESAR BOWLED THE PRINCE OF INDIA WITH A JAFFA. PITCHING BEFORE MIDDLE AND LEG, THE BALL TEASED SACHIN TENDULKAR FORWARD, BEFORE SPINNING VICIOUSLY OFF THE PITCH IN AN ENTIRELY NEW DIRECTION. THE MOST PROLIFIC BATSMAN IN TEST HISTORY WAS LEFT BENT DOUBLE IN RATHER UNREGAL FASHION, PEERING THROUGH HIS OWN LEGS TO CHECK IF IT WAS INDEED HIS OFF-STUMP THAT HAD BEEN FIRMLY UPROOTED.

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20 | December 7 2012 |

Monty Panesar

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The event Panesar refers to is when he

joined former Australia international Whitney

on stage at one of the gigs he now performs

with his rock band. Panesar was only

supposed to provide vocals for one song, but

ended up on stage for the best part of an

hour. The idea of this once-shy man actually

belting out Jessie’s Girl to a heaving Aussie

bar is the kind of event you’d think might

occur only in the dreams of Geoffrey Boycott

after he’d eaten too much Wensleydale.

It really did happen, though – and the

fact that it did is testament to Panesar’s

new-found confidence.

The now 30-year-old Panesar partially

attributes his growing self-assurance to the

professional mentoring he’s undergone with

the London County Cricket Club organisation,

under the guidance of former Somerset

cricketer Neil Burns. “It focuses on

developing performance and the mental side

of things; developing a stronger sense of

identity in yourself,” he explains. “They’ve

helped me to believe more in who I am and

what I can bring to a cricket team. Now I’m

more confident in myself in certain contexts.

I used to defer to the captain, the coach

and other players because I was unsure of

myself as a person – apart from when I was

bowling a ball.”

As well as the mental fortification, Panesar

has also put in the hard graft physically.

He talks of five weeks spent “integrating

training circuits between my bowling overs“.

He explains: “I’d do physical training between

bowling overs to challenge me; to see if my

bowling could maintain its quality over a long

period of time and pressure.

“I think the kind of work and time I’ve

invested in myself, on and off the pitch,

has led to a greater belief in myself.

That’s the key to producing consistently

top performances.”

TAKE TWODespite all of his hard work and diligent

preparation, Panesar naturally admitted to

nerves when he underwent what he referred

to as his “second debut” against Pakistan

in the UAE in January. His comeback

performance was a triumph, Panesar taking

14 wickets in just two Tests and claiming the

England man of the series award despite

missing out on selection for the first match.

Since then, he’s had to get used to life as a

drop-in player, never sure whether he will

play. In a repeat of the situation in the UAE,

he missed out on the first Test of this current

series before being picked for the second. >

MONTY PANESAR’S

2012 TEST

BOWLING AVERAGE

BEFORE THE MATCH

IN KOLKATA: 27

WICKETS IN FOUR

COMPLETED

MATCHES

22.7

"THE WORK AND TIME I'VE INVESTED IN MYSELF, ON AND OFF THE PITCH, HAS LED TO A GREATER BELIEF"

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22 | December 7 2012 |

Monty Panesar

Spin twins: Panesar

celebrates with

Swann after

bowling Pakistan’s

Mohammad Hafeez

in January

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“Even in the Mumbai Test, I felt under a lot

of pressure coming into the match,” he says.

“But it’s the kind of pressure that I kind of

enjoy now. I love playing for England. I love

bowling against the world’s best batters to

test myself. But I knew I had to perform at

my best if I was going to stay in the series

beyond Mumbai – and I was thrilled I was able

to produce career-best figures. I think me

and Swanny were able to dovetail nicely, and

help the team get the result. It sets up the

series nicely at one-all.”

Graeme Swann – the man Monty calls his

“spin twin” – is someone he looks upon as an

ally, his right-arm finger-spin working in a

natural tandem with Panesar’s southpaw

variety. “He’s obviously set the bar very high

over the past couple of years, but I love

bowling with him,“ he reflects. “We bowled

together back at Northampton, and we really

complement each other’s styles.”

Is it tricky that the pair are often in

competition for what is largely seen as

a single spinner’s place? “It’s up to the

selectors,“ says Panesar. “In this last match,

they went with the policy of two spinners, so

I hope they go into future Test matches with

that. But I don’t take things for granted. I’ve

learned not to take things for granted. I just

want to remain emotionally calm, focus on my

preparation and be ready for the opportunity,

should it present itself.”

SPINNING AND WINNINGA monkey now removed from his and Swann’s

back was the fact that England had never

previously won a Test match that the pair had

started together. They took matters into their

own hands in Mumbai. After the second ball

of the match, when James Anderson

removed Gautam Gambhir, the pair’s bowling

accounted for every Indian wicket. As was

widely lauded, they became the first England

spin pair to share 19 wickets in a single Test

since 1958.

“I think it was quite a memorable Test for

both of us,” says Panesar. “We’ve played in,

I think, seven Test matches and hadn’t won

one together. Partly, you know... maybe the

batters in the second innings... because we

kind of set it up…”

Panesar starts to reference the second

Test against Pakistan this year, when England

capitulated while chasing a modest 145 to

win in the second innings. He clearly has no

intention of openly blaming his teammates,

however, and quickly changes tack.

“Hopefully this was the first of many wins

for me and Swanny,“ he says. “But, to be

honest, Mumbai is history. Now it’s about

preparing for the next step. Yeah, I did enjoy

it, but I’m wise enough now to acknowledge

that there will be plenty more challenges

ahead of me. Remaining humble and being

ready for the next step must always be

the focus.”

He may now be more self-assured, but

remaining humble is something that will

always come easily to Panesar. If he keeps

bowling as he has in 2012, however, what

England might find is that this so-called

luxury player is a luxury they cannot

do without.

Alex Reid @otheralexreid

Investec, the specialist bank and asset manager, is

the title sponsor of Test Match cricket in England.

Visit the Investec Cricket Zone at investec.co.uk/

cricket or follow us on Twitter @InvestecCricket

ALASTAIR COOK’S CAPTAINCY“The captain was inspirational. His second

innings in the first Test showed us what

could be achieved – and he backed it up in

the second Test, too. The way that Cooky

is leading in his first proper tour as captain

gives us all confidence we can get stronger.”

BEST BOWLER HE’S PLAYED WITH“Freddie Flintoff was really good. When he

got the crowd going, he just bowled so well.

Jimmy Anderson is another – he’s got great

skill, an unbelievable bowler. So I think those

have been two of the best bowlers I’ve been

on the same field with.”

BEST BATSMAN FACED“That’s difficult, because you play against

some batters who are in really good form

coming in and you find them hard. Tendulkar

has never been easy. There’s a few others;

Matthew Hayden was another top player.

Different players, but both hard work.”

KILLING TIME ON TOUR“I enjoy the games, we’ve got FIFA here.

But to be honest, there’s been so much

Bollywood around us, I’m sort of getting into

that. I’m enjoying the movies, the music and

the whole Bollywood scene when I switch off

from cricket.”

RICKY PONTING’S DEPARTURE“He’s had a magnificent career. I’m just very

privileged to have been on the same field

as great cricketers like him. I look at it now

and think: ’Wow, I got a chance to bowl to

Ponting.’ I can think that because he’s

retired now, if you know what I mean.”

IF HE COULD EXCEL AT ANOTHER SPORT“Either boxing, football... or I don’t mind a bit

of athletics. What kind of boxer would I be?

Oh, I’d be a smart fighter – but if I can see a

flaw, I’m knocking you out! [Laughs] I’d be a

mixture.”

KEVIN PIETERSEN’S REINTEGRATION“Everything is fantastic. We’ve got a great

team environment and support staff. Kevin

Pietersen was exceptional in Mumbai. It was

another true, world-class innings – following

his excellence at Headingley – but we also

can’t forget Colombo earlier this year.

He’s been great.”

IF STUCK IN A LIFT WITH A TEAMMATE“It would be good to be with Swanny. We’d

just keep talking about spin bowling, and

then afterwards I could get him to do all

his different impressions. We’d just have

a laugh about that – I think that would

actually be good fun.”

MONTY ON…

SATURDAY INDIA v ENGLAND: THIRD TEST DAY 4 | KOLKATA | SKY SPORTS 1 3.25AM

∙ Chronograph

∙ Wor ld Time

∙ Alarm

∙ Back- l ight

∙ 10 Bar Water Res istance

∙ From the Nairobi Col lec t ion PV4005X1

| December 7 2012 | 27

The Goalkeeper

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Today, we take the goalkeeper for

granted. A football team is made up of 10

men in one design of shirt and one in another,

a divide so natural that when listing formations

nobody bothers with the first element: to speak of a

1-4-3-3 or 1-4-2-3-1 would seem absurd. Yet when

football began with the foundation of the Football

Association in 1863, there was no such thing as a

goalkeeper. So late, in fact, did the modern notion

of a goalkeeper come into being that it was only this

year that he celebrated his centenary.

Early football — in Britain at least — was all about

dribbling and scoring goals, and very little to do with

organising means of stopping them. None of the

many mid-19th century attempts at a set of unified

rules — that is, developing a football code that could

bring together in the same game sportsmen from

different public schools, all of whom had their own

way of playing what they termed ‘football’ — makes

reference to a goalkeeper. The first match played

under the rules of the FA was contested by Barnes

and Richmond. It finished in a goalless draw, despite

both sides taking to the field with two backs and nine

forwards, the usual formation of the age. Under the

early rules, any player could handle the ball by taking

a ‘fair catch’ – which permitted them a free-kick if,

immediately after catching the ball, they made an

impression in the pitch with their boot. Running with

the ball in both hands or scoring with a throw,

though, was not permitted.

The FA was merely following centuries of tradition.

The rules drawn up at Shrewsbury School in 1858

allowed for ‘fair catches’ but make no reference to

goalkeepers, while the 1887 Harrow Rules, which

clearly reflected the game as it had been played at

the school for some time, allowed ‘handling’ but only

to take a clean catch, at which the player had to

shout ‘yards’. If he did so, he was entitled to move

three yards in any direction without being challenged.

There was no lone player who hung back, although

there were, of course, defenders. In phaininda and

harpastum, ancient Greek and Roman games that

can be regarded as forerunners of football, slower

players were positioned at the back in what the

physician and philosopher Galen termed the ‘locus

stantium’ — ‘the position of the standing players’. >

From the days oF 15

'Funk-sticks' on the

same team to the

modern sweeper-keeper,

Jonathan wilson takes

us through 100 years oF

goalkeeping evolution

the last man

The Goalkeeper

28 | December 7 2012 |

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PITCH-LENGTH GOALSPart of the issue was that goals themselves

weren’t standardised. At some public schools,

the goal stretched the entire width of the pitch, while

at others it consisted of a single tree or door; if the

goal was either too big or too small, there was no

point in having a keeper. In Football at Westminster

School, HC Benham writes of games that featured

goals about 12 yards wide, the space between

conveniently located trees at either end of the pitch.

“The small boys, the duffers, and the funk-sticks were

the goalkeepers, 12 or 15 at each end, and were

spread out across this wide space,“ he said. “If any

fellow who was playing out showed any sign of ‘funk‘

or failed to play up, he was packed off into the goal at

once – not for that day, but as a lasting degradation.“

Once the 1863 laws standardised the goal at eight

yards wide and an 1866 revision (insisted upon by

players from the Sheffield club – which, unusually,

had grown up outside the public school framework)

introduced a maximum height of eight feet, it became

logical to try to defend that space with a single player.

The Sheffield Rules of 1857 make allowance for what

was effectively a ‘last man back‘ ruling, and from the

mid-1860s the goalkeeper was an accepted position.

Only in 1871, though, was he written into the laws

as the last remaining player who could use his hands.

At that stage, he could handle the ball anywhere on

the pitch. In 1887 he was restricted to handling in

his own half – a goalkeeper when handling, an FA

memorandum noted, was intended ‘to be in defence

of his goal’ – and only in 1912 to handling in his own

box, mainly because the Sunderland and Wales

goalkeeper Leigh Richmond Roose had a habit of

bouncing the ball to halfway and then launching kicks

on to the opponents’ goalmouth. It was also in 1912

that it was stipulated that the goalkeeper should

wear a different coloured shirt to the rest of his

team: the final division of the keeper from the rest.

Since then, the process has been one of gradual

reintegration. For a time, goalkeepers tended to hang

back and stay on their lines – but, slowly, the benefits

of advancing began to be recognised.

The first to be noted for his willingness to leave his

box was the Hungarian Gyula Grosics, a key part of

the side that won the 1952 Olympics and went on

to beat England 6-3 at Wembley the following year.

A hypochondriac who almost became a priest and

who would, while his teammates watched Westerns,

shut himself in his room to work on chess problems,

Grosics fitted the stereotype of the keeper almost

perfectly: intellectual and a little bit odd. He was the

start of a trend, though, and the likes of Lev Yashin,

perhaps the greatest keeper of them all, the

Bulgarian Apostol Sokolov and Liverpool’s Tommy

Lawrence began to advance: thus, the sweeper-

keeper was born.

GOING DUTCHBy the early seventies, Johan Cruyff was

able to insist that Holland selected as their

goalkeeper Jan Jongbloed, (below) just 5ft 10ins

and far from a great in the conventional sense, on the

grounds that he could read the game well and was a

decent passer of the ball. “If everybody moves

forward, you need an extra defender,“ said Cruyff,

explaining the Dutch pressing game. “So the

goalkeeper has to be able to play as well.“

Perhaps, Cruyff acknowledged, he would

occasionally get caught out with a long-range chip,

but that was a price worth paying for the benefits

he brought in terms of team structure and building

the play from the back. At the 1974 World Cup, the

Dutch allocated their squad numbers alphabetically

(Cruyff and his fabled 14 excepted), and so Jongbloed

wore 8, seeming to emphasise that he was just

another player, no different from his teammates.

The introduction of the backpass law in 1992

accelerated the process. Goalkeepers had to be

accomplished with at least one foot, ideally both. As

they’ve become better footballers, so they’ve begun

to get more involved in the play. Victor Valdes isn’t a

great shot-stopper, but he is essential to Barcelona’s

style — note how he kept passing the ball out even

after his mistake cost Barca a first-minute goal in

El Clasico last December.

Goalkeepers pass more, but they also now score

more. Gone are the days when a goal from a keeper

was a long punt from his own box; now they weigh in

with late headers and, increasingly, penalties and

free-kicks. Rogerio Ceni has scored more than

100 times for Sao Paulo.

He is an extreme case,

but he is symptomatic

of the prevailing mood:

goalkeepers are less and

less a man apart, and

are becoming once again

just another member of

the team.

The Outsider: A History of the

Goalkeeper by Jonathan Wilson

is out now (Orion Books), £20

"VICTOR VALDES ISN’T A GREAT SHOT-STOPPER, BUT HE IS ESSENTIAL TO BARCELONA’S STYLE"

© 2012 Barney’s Christmas, Inc. All Rights Reserved. © 2012 Lionsgate Home Entertainment UK. All Rights Reserved.

DVD

£12

DVD

£10

BLU-RAY

£15

Titles and prices subject to availability while stocks last. Prices may vary online.

TM © 2012 Lionsgate Home Entertainment UK. All Rights Reserved.

£18BLU-RAY

Titles and prices subject to availability while stocks last. Prices may vary online.

| December 7 2012 | 31

The Manchester Derby

DEJA

RED

AND

BLUE

Ahead of Sunday’s first

Manchester derby of the

season, we ask talkSPORT’s

Andy Gray a selection of

important questions –

starting with the

glaringly obvious

Is the battle for this season’s Premier League title already a two-horse race?”Not quite, although it’s

certainly shaping up that

way. If Chelsea find their

form – and that’s a big if – then they have

enough good players to fight their way back

into the shake-up. If they can get John Terry

and Frank Lampard back quickly, then their

experience can see them get involved.

”We don’t know quite how Tottenham are

going to do, although the signs are good from

Andre Villas-Boas and his squad, and they

are only a few points behind the top two.

Arsenal are probably too far behind to figure

now, but should still be thinking about the

Champions League places. But for the title

itself... well, it would be very surprising if

both United and City were to drop enough

points to let anybody else in. I don’t think

either are playing that great at the moment,

but they’re still getting the job done.” >SUNDAY MANCHESTER CITY v MANCHESTER UNITED | ETIHAD STADIUM | SKY SPORTS 1 1.30PM

The Manchester Derby

32 | December 7 2012 |

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same time. They’re the most mobile and work

better together than any other combination,

but the problem is that when Roberto Mancini

plays both he always has one out wide. He

might choose to go with three at the back this

weekend, though – that is something he has

tried quite a bit this season, and it does allow

him to get two men through the middle up top.“

Does Roberto Mancini need to win the Premier League to keep his job?“I think he needs to finish in the first two.

It’s difficult to win this league in consecutive

years, as I’ve said, and the disappointment

of another early exit from the Champions

League has put the pressure on him. But if

City want a man to lay down some roots, to

get the club moving forward, then changing

the manager all the time won’t give them that.

People will argue that Chelsea have won a

load of trophies while changing their manager

every 18 months, but I think City want stability

– so unless a manager comes up who they

desperately want, I don’t see any reason for

Mancini to be going anywhere.“

ON MANCHESTER UNITED...Can United really keep rescuing games after going behind?“The honest answer has to be no. I mean, how

they’ve got away with it so far is incredible,

and a great credit to them; the ability to win

games when you’re not playing well and being

poor defensively is what wins you titles –

but they are surely going to have to stop

conceding so many opening goals. They lost

the first goal against Everton, who are a good

side, and didn’t get back into it; they went

behind at home to Tottenham and couldn’t

recover; and the same happened away at

Norwich. As the season goes on, being

continually leaky at the back does put an

awful lot of pressure on those guys

up front. Robin van Persie, Wayne

Rooney and the rest have done

remarkably well – they’ve had

15 different scorers in the

Premier League this season,

which is absolutely incredible

– but Sir Alex Ferguson will

still be concerned.“

ON MANCHESTER CITY...City remain unbeaten, but are drawing too many and not playing that well. What are they lacking?“City have lost a bit of sparkle this season; it

may sound like a daft word, but they’ve lost a

little charisma from their football. The creative

side of their game is not as good as it was last

year, but opposing teams are now conscious

of what they’re up against and more defensive

than they might have been last season. History

shows us that it is difficult to win back-to-

back titles, of course, and I think City are

finding that out this season. They are unbeaten

going into December, though, which is still a

fantastic achievement. And a win on Sunday

would put them level on points with United.

After 16 games, I think they would take that.“

Keeping up with the neighbours:

Ferguson will face Mancini for

the 11th time in all competitions

on Sunday. Fergie leads 5-4, with

one draw, in November 2010

Does it matter how many they concede as long as they keep scoring more?“Oh yes, Sir Alex won’t be enjoying this.

Coaches love winning games, of course, but

they don’t like losing goals – and winning 4-3

at Reading last weekend will have been

horrendous for Fergie. He’d think: ’Why on

earth are we putting ourselves through this,

getting into a position where we’re having to

chase the game? We should have control of

the football, be running them all over the pitch

and winning two or three-nil.’ They’re not,

though – they’re winning 4-3, and he won’t like

that. And he knows full well that if they go into

the Champions League knockout stages

defending like that, then they’ll go out.“

Is the defence solely to blame, though?“When teams are conceding goals, it’s all too

easy to blame the back four and the keeper –

but if the rest of your team isn’t helping the

defence, then they are always going to be

vulnerable. Maybe it’s the case that those in

front of the defence – which has missed

Nemanja Vidic, but otherwise been a pretty

consistent line-up – aren’t doing enough; if

every attack against you is getting at your

back four, then eventually they are going to

creak. If you can stop attacks in midfield,

great; stop them higher up the pitch, even

better – but opponents are getting to United’s

back four too many times this season. At this

level, in this league, you need protection from

everybody across the pitch – and I don’t think

United are doing that well enough this season.“

Finally, the big question: how do you see Sunday’s game going?“The home team doesn’t often lose in these

big games. City are due a defeat, that much is

obvious, but they have a fantastic record at

the Etihad and will want to continue that.

Fergie absolutely loves getting results against

the teams that are his biggest opponents;

we’ve seen him do it time and time again, but I

just can’t see City losing this game. If Mancini

picks the right side, and the players go out

and play at the top of their game, then I think

they have more matchwinners than United at

this moment in time. If they defend properly,

then I think City will win the game.“

21

718

Premier League

goals conceded

by Man Utd so

far this season –

in the top half of

the table, only

Tottenham have

a worse record

Days since Man

City lost a league

game at the

Etihad Stadium

Where has that charisma been lost?“I don’t think Yaya Toure has had a good

season, for a start. He’s had flashes – most

notably away at Real Madrid in the Champions

League – but he’s only done it occasionally,

and not commanded games the way he did

last season. I think part of that has come

from the loss of Nigel de Jong alongside him

in midfield. I think maybe City didn’t know what

they had with de Jong – they thought Javi

Garcia might be the man to take over in there,

but this league is a tough one to come into

and it hasn’t really worked for him.

“Further forward, they can also look a little

narrow – particularly when they play Samir

Nasri and David Silva, who often start in the

wide areas but like to tuck in. The result is

that they don’t play with much width high up

the pitch, unless the full-backs get there;

James Milner can give it them, but they were

happy to let Adam Johnson leave and have

hardly played Scott Sinclair since bringing

him in. I’d like to see them play Sinclair more.“

What is City’s best strike partnership?“If it was my team, I would always

try to get Sergio Aguero and

Carlos Tevez on the pitch at the

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| December 7 2012 | 35

Louis Smith

Louis Smith is more famous

than ever. Not just because

he led Britain’s gymnasts

to Olympic team bronze.

And not because of his

individual brilliance on the

pommel horse. It’s because

he’s become that thing not

all sportsmen are entirely

at ease with having on

their CV: a celebrity >

Making it look ‘easy’:

with Strictly partner

Flavia Cacace

Louis Smith

36 | December 7 2012 |

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“It’s very alien to me,” says Louis Smith, his brow

furrowing at the mention of

the celebrity world into which

he strolled just weeks after

leaving the controlled chaos

of the Olympic Village.While most of his fellow athletes are back in the

gym, hoisting hefty weights and exchanging verbals

with coaches, Smith is on primetime television,

exchanging delicate touches and faux romantic

glances with a woman so beautiful she’d turn

most men to mush with a mere glance.

But not Smith. The 23-year-old remains singularly

focused on the job at hand, using a tunnel vision he’s

spent the past four years perfecting. It’s a focus

that saw him transform from a self-confessed

“mischievous kid” – who emerged wide-eyed from

the 2008 Olympics with a shock bronze medal and

an uncomfortable new position as a role model –

into a leader strong enough to guide a group of less

experienced gymnasts through the toughest test of

their young lives. And now into a dancer... at least

until the British public decides he isn’t one.

At that point, the spotlight illuminating Smith may

dim slightly. And it’s then that the most successful

British male gymnast in Olympic history will have

the chance to reflect on a summer that was both

astounding and infuriating. Not to mention a winter

that has taken him into territories no British

gymnast has ever ventured before.

You’ve been training like a professional

dancer for the past few months. How does

it compare with gymnastics training?

“It’s definitely less stressful than

gymnastics training; I don’t have the burden

of an Olympic Games round the corner, for a start.

But it is hard work. I knew it was going to be,

though, because what I do in the gym is hard work

– but we make it look easy. It’s exactly the same

watching the dancers perform on TV, although they

make it look easy. I could appreciate without even

trying that it would be hard work. I’m used to

putting my body in strange positions, though…”

Before the Games, you said your body was in pieces

from the years of graft. Is it starting to recover?

“I’d say it’s probably worse now. Although the gym

was hard on the body, it kind of held it together too.

Now that I haven’t been doing as much gym work,

my muscles aren’t as strong and my ligaments are

a bit looser – everything’s kind of aching a bit more.

So it is taking a toll on the body. The only gym stuff

I’m doing is what you see in the dance routines.

I don’t get time to do any gym otherwise, because

I train for Strictly from Monday to Thursday all day

– then Friday is the dress run and Saturday is the

live show. It’s a full-time thing.”

Is the plan to go back to gymnastics once your

dancing days are over?

“I can’t wait to get back in the gym and do some

training. I don’t really miss the competition

side, but I do miss getting in the gym and

training and having fun. In 19 years,

this is the longest I’ve ever had off.

It is nice to have a break, though,

and I’d actually prefer it if I

didn’t miss it. The fact I do

miss it is a bit frustrating,

because I’d like to have

complete time off – but

I can’t wait to get back

in the gym.” >

Louis Smith

38 | December 7 2012 |

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And on to Rio?

“I don’t know yet. I definitely want to get back into

it and keep training and keep up the fitness. And,

whether that spark comes back and I want to

compete again, we’ll soon see. One step at a time,

though – for the moment, I just want to get back

in the gym and train.”

How different is your life now to this time last

year, when you were preparing for the final

attempt at qualification for London 2012?

“It’s mad. I feel no pressure to do stuff. I guess

this is what it feels like to be a somewhat normal

person. I have responsibilities, but they’re a lot less

stressful. All the pressure that had been on me

in the build-up to the Games just lifted as soon as

my feet hit the floor after my final pommel horse

routine. It was the best feeling ever – the amount of

relief I felt – because everything had been geared

towards the Olympics. Every interview I did – and I

“All the pressure on me lifted as soon as my feet hit the floor after my final pommel horse routine”

did loads – they were all about 2012. Now, all my

questions are hardly about 2012; people have

forgotten that I was a gymnast.”

Yet you were so nearly a gold medal-winning

gymnast. How do you reflect now on your

pommel final, where you scored the same

number of points as the winner but missed

out on the gold because of a technicality?

“I’d be a fool to sit here and say I didn’t want the

gold medal, because I did. When I landed that

pommel horse routine, I thought I’d done enough

to get gold. But you can’t dwell on things – the

decisions I’ve made in life have made me who I

am today. I did what I did; I went to the Games

and performed the best routine I’ve ever

done in my life. I stepped it up on

the night and did my harder

routine the best I’ve ever

done it – and I got a silver

and a bronze medal from

that Olympic Games.

I can look back and be

a happy man.”

But if you could go back and do it again...

“I wouldn’t want to do it again. I don’t think I could

ever do that routine as good as I did it then. Out of

all my training routines, that was the best routine

I’d done in my life, and I did it at an Olympic Games. >

Strictly silver: Smith goes

through the ˝best routine of

his life ̋in the men’s pommel

horse final this summer

“We beat America, we beat Russia, we beat Germany. It’s bonkers”

I always said if I nailed that routine, I’d have the

potential to get the gold. But it was just the other

guy was a little better that day.”

Your own performances aside, were there any at

the Games that left you open-mouthed in awe?

“Our team event. I didn’t get to watch that much of

the rest of the Games, but our team event was just

crazy. We came third at the Olympic Games – Great

Britain. We beat America, we beat Russia, we beat

Germany. It’s absolutely bonkers. A few years ago,

people would have called us mad if we’d said we

would win a medal. We probably would have said so

Louis Smith

too, even the night before the Games. We knew we

had the potential to do well, but we didn’t really bank

on other teams messing up so much – which is the

reason why we got medals. It shows that anything

can happen. I said it so many times before the

Games – you can be an Olympic champion in training,

but when it comes to competition it’s something

else entirely.”

Those gymnasts who do mess up have nowhere

to hide while the competition is going on; they have

to complete the rotation of all the apparatus.

How hard is it to handle that aspect of the sport?

“You want to do so well – not just for you, but for

the whole team. And because the team is banking

on each score to count, you don’t want to feel like

you’ve let them down. It’s a lot of responsibility –

and, when it goes right, it’s the best feeling.

But when it goes wrong, you really

feel yourself slipping into a rut.”

As one of the most experienced gymnasts in the

British team, did you give the others advice on how

their lives might change after the Games?

“It’s a hard change to go through, when you come

off the back of an Olympics having been successful.

After Beijing, my life changed overnight. It wasn’t

that I didn’t want it to, but it was just such a drastic

change – nothing about it was gradual. I was a

mischievous 19-year-old, still a bit naughty. And then

all of a sudden I was a role model. Everyone was

looking at me and talking about me. For that to

happen to you overnight is tough – it can be hard to

deal with.”

And now you have to deal with all the attention

that comes with being a celebrity on primetime

Saturday night television…

“Yeah, it’s very alien to me, I’m still getting used to it.

It’s just very different. When I did sport interviews

[before starting Strictly Come Dancing], they were

interested in every single word I said, and they’d print

it word for word and fact for fact. Now it’s almost

like they’re trying to get dirt out of what you say, or

they’ll leave parts of your conversation out to make

it suggest something else. It’s a completely different

world. Normally, if something’s not right, you’d say.

But I’m having to learn to just let it blow over and be

quiet, and let people think that what they’re reading is

the truth. It’s hard, but it’s just another learning

curve for me.”

Sarah Shephard @sarahsportmag

The Louis Smith 2013 calendar is available now from

www.louis-smith-official.com

| December 7 2012 | 41

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43 | December 7 2012 |

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Adidas Finale ball

Did you know that the colours of the

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Adidas Adizero F50

Compatible with adidas’ miCoach

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Pantofola D’Oro Antares Canguro

Handmade from Italian leather by the

same methods used since the 1880s,

these classics are the boots of choice

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if they’re good enough for Scotty...

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Nike Strike PL Hi-Vis

We remember when the yellow ball was a

rare treat, only used when it was actually

snowing. Now it’s used for half the year,

in a highly visible attempt to boost

merchandise sales around Christmas.

£16 | nike.com

Savile Rogue scarves

Although the company’s name now sounds

like an upcoming Dispatches documentary,

they make super posh scarves that won’t

get you beaten up on the terraces. Just

be sure to remove the price tag.

From £55 | savile-rogue.com

Nike GS Concept II

Nike’s fastest-ever boot is made from

recycled materials and, at just 160 grams,

is 15 per cent lighter than anything else

they’ve done. Worn by Theo Walcott –

who’s certainly fast, if nothing else. >

£250 | nike.com

Your Christmas wish list Not sure what presents you want? Over the next 10 pages, our Christmas Gift Guide will tell you. Football first...

44 | December 7 2012 |

Christmas Gift Guide

Adidas Originals AR 2.0

These indigo (yes, it doesn’t just appear in the rainbow)

trainers feature textured uppers and a Velcro ankle

strap. They’ll go great with your violet trousers.

£70 | jdsports.co.uk

Nike Lunar Force 1 XXX Anniversary

These are the trainers Neil Armstrong was wearing

when he first stepped on to the moon. No, not really.

But the striking sneaker weighs just 332 grams (even

less on the moon). £TBC | Nike stores, from Wednesday

Adidas Porsche Design Easy

For the Porsche owner who has everything. These

lightweight shoes offer high breathability and a smooth

ride, just like your Porsche...

£175 | adidas.co.uk

Vans x Barbour Classic Era Wingtip

An unlikely pairing of teenage shoes and designer coats,

the Vans x Barbour range has a smart finish, with tartan

insole and Vans’ signature ‘reverse waffle’ outsole.

£80 | shop.vans.co.uk

K-Swiss Gowmet II VNZ

Vulcanised soles ensure these K-Swiss trainers will

last the course – and they have five stripes, which is

two whole stripes more than adidas. Bargain. >

£60 | kswiss.co.uk

Puma x UNDFTD Gametime Clyde Pack

Inspired by the original 1973 Clyde basketball shoe,

Undefeated’s take on the classic Puma trainer comes in

a range of colours corresponding to famous teams, from

LA Lakers purple to Boston Celtic green. £55 | size.co.uk

Stocking fillers The best trainers money can buy. So good, in fact, you’ll be tempted to keep them yourself

46 | December 7 2012 |


Forum Youngblood Double Dog

Snowboard

Whether you are a young pup who laps up

the snow or, as the name here suggests,

there are two of you, this board with a

sintered base will get you up to speed

and off the lip fast. £340 | surfdome.co.uk

Nike Gyakusou Running Jacket

Just because you like running doesn’t

mean you have to look like a sweaty mess

all the time. Smarten up with Nike’s

designer leaf-print running jacket –

a perfect mix of style and substance.

£275 | mrporter.com

Nerf N-Strike Elite Hail Fire

If Terminator taught us anything, it’s that

skill with weapons is going to be a key

component of survival in the bleak

post-apocalyptic future. Give your kids

a head start with this NERF blaster.

You won’t regret it. £53 | amazon.co.uk

Rohan Powerstation Gloves

Snowball fights are great. Cold hands, less

so. These will give you an edge over the local

oiks – they’re heated by a rechargeable

battery to keep your hands nice and

toasty while you pelt children with ice. >

£125 | rohan.co.uk

Osprey Manta 25 Pack

This multi-sport activity pack has all the

bells and whistles you’d expect (although

no actual bells or whistles) and includes

a three-litre water reservoir. Of course,

you don’t have to limit yourself to water.

£100 | ellis-brigham.com

Killy Spartacus Jacket

Aggressive 3D engineering (no, we

don’t know what that means either) in

lightweight breathable and waterproof

fabric make this comfortable jacket a

perfect choice for any outdoor pursuits.

£850 | ellis-brigham.co.uk

The North Face Arctic Hedgehog

Hiking Boots

Robust nubuck leather uppers and a

hydroseal waterproof membrane keep out

rain, snow and other liquids. Heatseeker

400g insulation keeps your feet warm

as well. £110 | ellis-brigham.com

Nike+ FuelBand Black Ice

Strap it on and collect ‘Nike Fuel’ points

every time you exercise. You can trade

those points in for a self-satisfied glow of

self-improvement, which will vanish the

minute you tuck into your second helping

of turkey. £129 | store.nike.com

Nike Zoom DK QS Double

Tongue Snowboarding Boots

Inspired by the decor applied to fighter

jets, these limited-edition snowboarding

boots were developed in conjunction with

snowboard legend Danny Kass.

£275 | ss20.com

Baby it’s cold outside … but it’s good for your health to get out there and get active, so this lot should help

48 | December 7 2012 |


Met Kaos Ultimate Free Ride MTB Helmet

This helmet might not be as flashy as a tablet, but it’ll

stop your loved ones getting squashed. And isn’t that

what Christmas is really all about?

£120 | surfdome.com

BMW Bike Rucksack

This versatile rucksack is decorated with the German car

manufaturer’s logo and brings with it all the quality that

implies – with versatile pockets and a fold-out helmet

holder for, well, you know. £60 | bmw-shop.com

Kansi 9 Twenty

A nine-speed drivetrain makes this bike great for tackling

hills, and it folds up so you can take it easily on to public

transport if you decide to give up halfway up said hill.

£875 | kansi.co.uk

Ciclotte Steelish Exercise Bike

If the weather outside is frightful, you still have no excuse

not to cycle. Sorry. But you can do it in style with one of

these striking indoor bikes.

£6,000 | ciclotte.com

Mio Cyclo 305 HC

Perfect if you know someone who’s taken up cycling since

the Tour and you’re worried about them getting lost. Even

they will find it difficult with Mio Cyclo’s range of tools. >

From £350 | eu.mio.com

Mango Bike

This range of custom bikes lets you choose your colours,

pedals, handlebars and more – and you can be more

imaginative than pink for girls and blue for boys.

£269 | mangobikes.co.uk

Fast Christmas Know someone caught up in the cycling craze? Encourage them with these cracking gifts

50 | December 7 2012 |

Samsung Galaxy SIII

The first real challenger to the iPhone’s

hegemony, the SIII’s sleek rounded

corners and massive 4.8-inch screen

make it a perfect Christmas gift for

anyone looking for a change of scenery.

Free on £42/mth contract | vodafone.co.uk

Google Nexus 10

The search giant takes another step

towards global domination, and you can

help by giving their powerful 10-inch

tablet as a gift this Yule. It runs the latest

version of Android on its HD screen.

£319 | play.google.com

Microsoft Surface

It’s two presents in one, although you

do have to give them both to the same

person. The Microsoft Surface combines

tablet portability with laptop typability for

the best of both worlds. >

£399 | microsoft.com/surface

iPad mini

A tablet is for life, not just for Christmas,

so make sure you put your regular iPad in

a home or something before you change

down to the 7.9-inch iPad mini. Or give

it as a gift and keep this for yourself.

From £269 | apple.com/uk

Nokia Lumia 920

The 4G Lumia 920 runs Windows Phone 8

and adds innovative camera features like

Smart Shoot, which lets you combine

several group photos into one great shot.

Perfect for post-Christmas lunch snaps.

£50 on £41/mth contract | ee.co.uk

iPhone 5

Taller, thinner and more powerful,

comparing the iPhone 5 to its

predecessors is like comparing Zlatan

Ibrahimovic to Andy Carroll, with Siri the

ludicrous bicycle kick in this scenario.

Free on £47/mth contract | vodafone.co.uk


Seasonal screens Keep connected this Christmas. Or just play loads of Angry Birds while your in-laws bicker

52 | December 7 2012 |

Kindle Paperwhite

You know the drill by now – thousands of

books, incredibly portable, long battery

life. The Paperwhite also has a built-in

light that evenly illuminates the screen.

A perfect gift if your partner likes books

and you like sleep. £109 | amazon.co.uk

Bowers & Wilkins A7 Wireless

Music System

Drag your record collection into the future

with this 150W sound system. It has Apple

AirPlay technology, so you can stream

music to it from anywhere in the house.

£699 | johnlewis.co.uk

Ruark R1 DAB Radio

The R1 certainly has a striking design,

but it’s got substance as well as style,

with leading sound quality and DAB and

FM tuners. Perfect for listening to the

Boxing Day football.

£180 | selfridges.co.uk

Canon EOS M

Put simply, the EOS M offers SLR-quality

photos with point-and-click features

thrown in. Use the touchscreen to select

focus points and preview the effects

of your aperture and focal length. >

£650 | amazon.co.uk

Qlocktwo Wall Clock

Words replace numbers on this beautiful

wall clock, which spells out the time on a

grid of letters. Which is great if you like

pretty things, or haven’t yet learned

how to tell the time on a normal clock.

£800 | firebox.com

Samsung DA-E750 Audio Dock

A gorgeous wooden box houses a

genuine valve amplifier for a warmth of

sound that you just don’t get with most

modern audio systems. A really lovely

take on the ubiquitous iPod/Android dock.

£555 | currys.co.uk

Skullcandy Aviator Edit

Headphones

A unique pair of headphones for someone

unique, the colours of various parts of

the Edits can be customised so you can

find a combination that suits anyone.

£180 | uk.skullcandy.com


Batteries included Our pick of top tech – because even adults like a new toy to play with on Christmas morning

ESTABLISHED IN FINLAND 1964

happy Finnish

Come on Santa Claus make me happy!

19 Inch LED TV/DVD Combi

HD, Freeview & PVR

• DVD Built-in

• Freeview built-in

• PVR USB Recording

• Slim HD LED

£109.99 MODEL NO: 19H6030S-D

shop now at Finluxdirect.comwith free next day delivery

Shop online at Finluxdirect.com for the UK’s best prices on 3D, Smart, LED and

DVD Combi TVs with Free Next-Day delivery. That’s what we call a happy Finnish!

32 Inch Smart LED TV

Full HD 1080p, USB PVR Recording

& Freeview HD built-in

Bring a world of HD entertainment, catch-up

TV, and on-demand services into the comfort

of your own living room. Featuring an ultra-slim

design, this 32-inch TV will allow you access to

great online content from its range of included

applications. This TV also comes with a USB

Wi-Fi dongle that’ll allow you to connect the set

to your home network wirelessly.

£279.99 SAVE £120.00! MODEL NO:32F8030-T

42 Inch 3D LED TV Full-HD 1080p

Freeview, PVR & 8 x 3D Glasses

• 42-inch LED TV

• 8 Pairs of 3D Glasses

• Full HD 1080p

• PVR Recording

£369.99 MODEL NO: 42F7020-D

54 | December 7 2012 |


London 2012: Olympic Games

Relive the records, the heartbreak and

the sheer gluttony of GB’s medal haul.

With more than seven hours of highlights

and both ceremonies, you’ll never be

bored again. Not with the fast-forward

function, anyway. £20 | Rakuten’s play.com

Be Careful What You Wish For

Former Crystal Palace chairman Simon

Jordan lifts the lid on his decade at the

helm of the south London club. It’s brash

and bold, like the man himself, and an

illuminating insight into the life of

a chairman. £13 | amazon.co.uk

Being: Liverpool

Brendan Rodgers steals the show with

lines such as “I think of all the players as

my children” – but access to team talks,

training, player homes and more means

there’s enough in this behind-the-scenes

look to please any Red. £14 | amazon.co.uk

Running With The Kenyans

Adharanand Finn moved his young family

to Kenya to find out the secrets of the

country’s long-distance runners for

this good-natured and insightful tome.

The least you could do is give it to

someone as a gift. £7.50 | amazon.co.uk

Ryder Cup 2012

Witness the American crowds lose their

voices as Poults and pals fight back. Disc

two offers a captain’s diary and exclusive

behind-the-scenes footage, but it’s the

on-course action that will have you up on

your feet. £19.50 | Rakuten’s play.com

The Secret Race

Tyler Hamilton’s explosive exposé

shattered the myth of seven-time Tour

‘winner’ Lance Armstrong, and picked up

the William Hill Sports Book of the Year

award. An incredibly important book for

any fan of cycling. £11 | amazon.co.uk

Holidays are comingDVDs Books

If Christmas TV adverts are driving you mad, try these books, DVDs and games instead

London 2012 O�cial

Commemorative Book

Remember when we abandoned our

national cynicism for a month? It was

great – and what better gift to give than

some glossy photographs of smiling Brits.

£24 | amazon.co.uk

| 55

Wii U

Nintendo’s new console brings a whole

host of innovations to the living room

thanks to the GamePad controller, which

acts as a second screen but can also be

used on its own if someone wants to

watch TV. £260 | game.co.uk

Super Mario Bros U

Gorgeous new levels traverse all stages

of difficulty in Mario’s newest adventure,

while the GamePad is incorporated

superbly, with the option of a five-player

co-op. And you can distract enemies by

tapping them. £45 | game.co.uk

Call of Duty: Black Ops II

We’ve not heard of this one, but it is,

apparently, a big deal. Something about

two unique interchanging storylines, an

incredible multiplayer community and new

maps and weapons. It’ll never catch on.

Xbox | £42 | game.co.uk

PES 2013

After years in bargain bins, Pro Evo is

back to its best, with intricate controls

enabling total control and a return to the

purity of passing and shooting that used

to make PES king. Welcome back, old friend.

PS3 | £25 | Rakuten’s play.com

Arkham City: Armoured Edition

If you haven’t played Batman’s latest

adventure yet, the villain-laden city

storyline is a belter. If you’ve conquered

Arkham City before, meanwhile, the

GamePad’s hands-on fun reinvigorates

the whole experience. £40 | game.co.uk

Football Manager 2013

The marriage-wrecker is back, with the

usual raft of improvements and new

‘Classic Mode’ – a simplified version that

lets you play through a season in six hours

or so. You could win the Champions League

by Boxing Day. PC | £20 | game.co.uk

Assassin’s Creed III

Desmond Miles is rewriting history again,

this time via Ratohnhake:ton (Connor

to his pals) in colonial America. With

new weapons, a rebuilt engine and close

combat, franchise fans will love it. >

PS3 | £42 | Rakuten’s play.com

Madden 13

A new infinity engine and redesigned

menu deliver a fresh feel, but it’s the

career mode – with new depths of

interaction, on and off the field – that will

have you happily snapping away until the

early hours. Xbox | £37 | amazon.co.uk

Halo 4 Limited Edition

The fourth instalment is the start of

a trilogy, as Master Chief heads to the

gorgeous planet Requiem, while co-op

and revamped multiplayer options will

ensure many more sleepless nights.

Xbox | £100 | Rakuten’s play.com

Wii U Video games

56 | December 7 2012 |

Polar RC3 GPS HR

Like a mini computer on your wrist – or witchcraft, as we

like to call it – this will track the route, speed and distance

of your workout, with all your heart and body readings

thrown in for good measure. £226 | milletsports.co.uk

Seiko Barcelona Chronograph

Like the team themselves, Seiko’s official

Barcelona watch is classy, good-looking

and performs with minimal fuss. Some

say it’ll stop working if you wear it in

Glasgow on a rainy Wednesday night, but

we don’t care. £166 | watchshop.com

Nike+ Sportwatch GPS

Track your runs with the TomTom-

powered GPS function, record all your

previous efforts and try to beat your PBs.

A great running accessory, Nike’s personal

trainer even reminds you to go for a run.

Sadists. £149 | nikeplus.nike.com

Rotary Aquaspeed Chronograph Bracelet

Gadgets, gizmos and mod cons are all well and good for

the tech crazy, but you can’t beat a classically good-

looking watch. Stripped back and elegant, Rotary’s steel

Aquaspeed does the job perfectly. £211 | thewatchhut.co.uk

Casio G-Shock Frogman Chronograph

Designed for diving enthusiasts, Casio’s latest durable

wrist accessory is water-resistant to 200m. It also

boasts a dive-time log and all the usual razzmatazz. >

£500 | watchshop.com


Wrist musts Whether you dive, run or show your Catalan spirit, these watches will tell you when it’s Christmas Day

Info

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421243631301

58 | December 7 2012 |

Bacardi Oakheart Spiced Rum

In the spirit of completing proper

reviews, we’ve been secretly drinking all

of these at our desk for the past month

– and can report that this spiced rum

would make an excellent Christmas gift.

£20 | thewhiskyexchange.co.uk

Jack Daniel’s Tennessee Honey

We think the boss might be on to us.

We’re going to have to finish off the rest

of this spiced honey liqueur with floral

undertones and a long smooth finish on

the train home. That’s allowed, right?

£25 | thewhiskyexchange.co.uk

Wembley Way Stone

A loving message on the road to the

famous Wembley Stadium – what better

gift for an England fan? The FA do

reserve the right to remove profanities

from what you write. Sorry, West Ham.

From £50 | wembleystadium.com

Bear Grylls Survival Academy

Three days in the wilderness, exposed to

the elements and forced to hunt for food

under the guidance of expert survivalists.

This could be a well-meaning gift, or

a cleverly designed revenge package.

£1,400 | beargryllssurvivalacademy.com

Thomas Lyte Poker Set

A grained leather mustard-coloured case

lined with suede holding 600 chips and

cards could lend a high-class feel to your

poker evenings. You might even be able

to win back some of the cost.

£575 | thomaslyte.com

Wembley Stadium Tours

Experience the rich history of England’s

national stadium. Well, experience

England’s national stadium at any rate,

with a guided stadium tour. A great

present for any football-mad kids.

£9/£16 | wembleystadium.com/tours

Tanqueray No. 10 Gift Set

This gin box set is great for making

a Martini, thanks to the two glasses

included – but not so great for

surreptitiously swigging during

meetings, tribunals or interventions.

£55 | harveynichols.com


Winter warmers Well, three warmers and one trip to the Scottish wilderness with Bear Grylls – take a coat

Manny Pacquiao enters his fourth fight with old rival

Juan Manuel

Marquez this

weekend,

understanding just how the Mexican feels.

Despite being ahead on the overwhelming

majority of experts’ scorecards, the

Pac Man suffered a controversial points

defeat to American Tim Bradley in June.

While that robbery was more derided

than any of the three previous Pacquiao-

Marquez decisions, the result of each of

those fights has been hotly debated. The

score so far (one draw, two narrow points

wins to Pacquiao) is not a fair reflection of

Marquez’s contribution, but does indicate

how evenly the pair are matched.

The general consensus for this

welterweight clash is that Pacquiao —

stung by his ‘loss’ to Bradley — rebounds

with another tight victory.

Yet it’s not that clear-cut. Marquez may

be 39 years old to Pacquiao’s 33, but his

more classical boxing style is better suited

to ageing gracefully than Pacquiao’s

whirlwind intensity. There have been

notable signs in recent fights that

Pacquiao’s buzzsaw dynamism is in

terminal decline. He still has a speed

advantage, but speed can be beaten by

timing. And not having found a solution to

Marquez’s counterpunching right hands in

36 previous rounds means the Filipino is

unlikely to discover one now.

Pacquiao — younger, bigger,

harder-hitting and with an aggressive

style that (more often than not) impresses

judges — deservedly starts as favourite.

However, we wouldn’t be at all surprised if

Marquez boxes craftily enough to pull off

the upset. Whether the judges choose to

recognise that, of course, is another

matter entirely.

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7 DaysDEC 7-DEC 13

HIGHLIGHTS

» Football: Premier League Preview » p62

» Football: Capital One Cup Round 5 » p64

» Cricket: KFC T20 Big Bash League » p64

» Rugby Union: Heineken Cup Round 3 » p66

» Horse Racing: Tingle Creek Chase » p68OUR PICK OF THE ACTION FROM THE SPORTING WEEK AHEAD

60 | December 7 2012 |

Saturday BOxING | MANNY PACqUIAO v JUAN MANUEL MARqUEz | MGM GRAND, LAS VEGAS | PRIMETIME 2AM

Fourplay

If Manchester United are to stretch their lead at

the top of the Premier League this weekend,

they will have to do it the hard way: by beating

a team that has seemingly forgotten how to

lose (at home, in the league, that is).

Manchester City’s last league defeat at

the Etihad came in December 2010, some 37

games ago. It’s a run that takes in their crucial

1-0 victory over Alex Ferguson’s side in April

– a result that put them top of the league on

goal difference, with two games remaining.

And we all know what happened next.

But that was then. Now, Roberto Mancini’s

side are not so much gliding through the

season as trudging through it, dragging

their feet like a bunch of sullen children. Yes,

they’re the only side yet to lose in the league

– but, one single demolition job on Aston Villa

aside, there has been little sign of the

swashbuckling City of last term.

Swashbuckling is something United boss

Alex Ferguson will hope to see less of from his

side on Sunday, after they conceded three in

23 minutes at the Madejski last weekend.

United scored four in just 11 minutes more,

but ‘we’re gonna score one more than you’ is

hardly a refrain Ferguson will want to hear

too much of from his side’s supporters.

Having conceded 21 league goals already

this season – 10 more than City – United have

clearly missed the influence of their captain

Nemanja Vidic, who had knee surgery in

September. The defender has returned to

training, but remains unlikely to be rushed

back for what could be a testing encounter.

Fergie is certainly desperate enough,

calling his side’s defending the “worst of the

season” last weekend. From there, though,

the only way is up. He hopes.

262 | December 7 2012 |

7 Days

SUNDAY MAN CITY v MAN UTD | ETIHAD STADIUM | SKY SPORTS 1 1.30PM

Feeling blue

SATURDAY ARSENAL v WEST BROM | EMIRATES STADIUM | 3PM

Arsene Wenger will wonder how it has come to this, but a win for his side

against West Brom on Saturday will put them back in the hunt for fourth

place, and just two points behind the Baggies – currently in fifth.

A win for Steve Clarke’s side, on the other hand, could propel them

into the top three. Going on last weekend’s defeat to Swansea at the

Emirates for the home side, it’s a distinct possibility. Even Wenger

admitted that “the quality was not there” from his side.

West Brom have also hit a relatively rocky patch in the context of

their stellar season, with last weekend’s defeat to Stoke a second on

the bounce. Last time the Baggies lost two in a row, they roared back

with four wins on the trot. Don’t say we didn’t warn you, Arsene.

SUNDAY EVERTON v TOTTENHAM | GOODISON PARK | 3PM

A meeting between two teams that have flourished and frustrated in equal

measure this season. After defeats to Manchester City and Arsenal,

Tottenham have now won their past three. Everton, meanwhile, have

drawn seven of their past nine, leaving them gazing up at Spurs when

they could be looking down. Or should be, David Moyes would argue, having

watched his side concede 90th-minute equalisers against both Norwich

and Fulham in recent weeks. Had they not, the Toffees would sit third.

Spurs are likely to be without Gareth Bale after he limped off against

Fulham last weekend. But Jermain Defoe (above, left) is their danger

man right now, with nine league goals this season. Keep an eye on him

as the clock ticks down towards full time, then.

Premier League City took the Manchester bragging rights last season.

Now United want them back. And what Fergie wants...

Since Nemanja

Vidic’s last league

appearance on

September 15,

United have kept

just two clean

sheets in 11

league games

SATURDAY WIGAN v QPR DW STADIUM | 3PM

All

pic

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es

SUNDAY WEST HAM v LIVERPOOL UPTON PARK | SKY SPORTS 1 4PM

MONDAY FULHAM v NEWCASTLE CRAVEN COTTAGE | SS1 8PM

SATURDAY SUNDERLAND v CHELSEA | STADIUM OF LIGHT | 3PM

Martin O’Neill’s one-year anniversary

as Sunderland manager has not been a

happy one. His team are one place clear

of the drop zone and welcome Chelsea

hoping the civil unrest at Stamford

Bridge gives them a chance of an upset.

That said, seven league games without a

win for the Blues is their worst run since

1995. Rafa Benitez has said his job

would be easier with the club’s fans

behind him. This one’s not easy, Rafa.

Harry Redknapp’s search for a win turns

north, with QPR looking to avoid the

(dis)honour of going the most games

from the start of a Premier League

season without a win. It could be tricky,

judging by Wigan’s last performance at

the DW, when they briefly threatened

Man City despite eventually losing.

QPR’s fate will be decided this month,

says ‘Arry; with one point so far, the

future’s not looking too bright.

No Andy Carroll or Luis Suarez could

make for a quiet game at Upton Park.

The long-haired loanee from Liverpool

is recovering from a knee injury (and

the terms of his loan mean he cannot

feature), while Suarez is suspended.

This presents Brendan Rodgers with

the challenge of creating goals without

a proven goalscorer. Meanwhile, Sam

Allardyce can call on Carlton Cole. And

so arguably faces the same challenge.

Fulham are quietly struggling, with no

wins in their past seven league games.

They haven’t scored in their last three,

either – a trend that will worry Martin

Jol almost as much as their defensive

record of 26 conceded in 15 league

games. Newcastle’s struggles have been

less quiet; although it was Demba Ba to

the rescue yet again on Monday night,

the Magpies are yet to win a game away

from St James’ Park this season.

| 63

SATURDAY SWANSEA v NORWICH LIBERTY STADIUM | 3PM

Three goals in 17 minutes gave Norwich a

3-2 win at the Liberty last season, and

consigned Swansea to what was then

only their second home league defeat.

It could be deja vu on Saturday, because

the Swans have lost only once at home

this term and Norwich are undefeated

since early October. But Michael

Laudrup’s side will be boosted by an

impressive week, in which they picked

up seven points in six days.

Man Utd 15 12 0 3 37 21 36

Man City 15 9 6 0 28 11 33

Chelsea 15 7 5 3 25 16 26

Tottenham 15 8 2 5 28 23 26

West Brom 15 8 2 5 24 19 26

Everton 15 5 8 2 25 19 23

Swansea 15 6 5 4 23 17 23

West Ham 15 6 4 5 19 17 22

Stoke 15 5 7 3 14 12 22

Arsenal 15 5 6 4 24 16 21

Liverpool 15 4 7 4 19 18 19

Norwich 15 4 7 4 13 21 19

Fulham 15 4 5 6 25 26 17

Newcastle 15 4 5 6 17 21 17

Aston Villa 15 3 5 7 12 23 14

Wigan 15 4 2 9 15 28 14

Sunderland 14 2 7 5 13 18 13

Southampton 15 3 3 9 21 32 12

Reading 14 1 6 7 19 27 9

QPR 15 0 6 9 11 27 6

P W D L F A Pts

1

2

3

4

5

6

7

8

9

10

11

12

13

14

15

16

17

18

19

20

Premier League table

Arsenal have made

the most errors

leading to goals

in the Premier

League this

season, with 1010

SATURDAY ASTON VILLA v STOKE VILLA PARK | 3PM

Since taking a tonking from Manchester

City, Aston Villa have been on what Paul

Lambert terms “a good little run”.

They’re only two points clear of

the relegation zone, though, while

recognised goalscorer Darren Bent

remains mysteriously benched.

With Saturday’s visitors Stoke

possessing the league’s second-best

defensive record, Lambert might live

to regret his anti-Bent bias.

SATURDAY SOUTHAMPTON v READING | ST MARY’S | 3PM

“This is a one-off,” said Reading boss

Brian McDermott of his side’s 4-3

goalfest defeat to Manchester United

last weekend. He may have forgotten

the seven goals conceded against

Arsenal in the League Cup, but Nigel

Adkins won’t have. He will look to

use the Royals as Southampton’s

springboard out of the relegation

places. With a trip to Chelsea up next

for the Saints, it would be a timely leap.

64 | December 7 2012 |

Ro

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TUESDAY FOOTBALL | CAPITAL ONE CUP ROUND 5: BRADFORD v ARSENAL | VALLEY PARADE | SKY SPORTS 2 7.45PM

7 Days

FRIDAY CRICKET | KFC T20 BIG BASH LEAGUE: RENEGADES v STARS | ETIHAD STADIUM, MELBOURNE | SKY SPORTS 3 8AM

Crash bash

wallop

We might be getting excited about Test cricket

again, but is there now a fan of the sport

anywhere who doesn’t secretly love

Twenty20 too?

This weekend sees the start of the Big

Bash competition in Australia, the down

under version of the IPL. And the Bash

starts with a bang straight away, as the

first two fixtures see derby matches in

both Melbourne and Sydney.

First up this morning, then, Melbourne

Renegades take on Melbourne Stars.

What that means is Murali v Warne

(pictured), Du Plessis v Malinga and...

er, Pattinson v Pattinson.

A tremendous start, but chances are

there will be more fireworks tomorrow –

when attention moves north for the duel

between last year’s champions the Sydney

Sixers and the Michael Clarke-led Sydney

Thunder at the SCG (Sky Sports 4, 8am).

For the Sixers, despite the presence of

the likes of Brett Lee, David Warner and

Brad Haddin, all eyes will be on England’s

Michael Lumb, who won the Golden Bat

award as the competition’s top scorer last

season. For the Thunder, Clarke, who has

been in ridiculously good Test form, may

have to take a back seat to the world’s most

thrilling Twenty20 batsman, Chris Gayle.

And the action doesn’t stop there – on

Sunday the Brisbane Heat host the Hobart

Hurricanes at the Gabba (Sky Sports 4,

7am). Cue another standing ovation for

the visitors’ Ricky Ponting. This could

run and run.

Arsenal’s topsy-turvy but highly entertaining

12-goal game against Reading in the previous

round of the Capital One Cup has clearly

convinced broadcasters that the Gunners

are worth following on their mission to win

a first trophy in seven years.

On Tuesday night the Sky cameras follow

Arsene Wenger’s troop to Valley Parade,

where League Two side Bradford City will

look to go one step further than their

quarter-final appearance of 1989 – when

they were knocked out by Bristol City.

Bantams boss Phil Parkinson declared

himself ecstatic with their penalty shootout

victory against Wigan in the previous round,

admitting Wigan gave his side “problems we

don’t normally come up against in League

Two, in terms of the movement of the team

and their shape”.

Arsenal had problems of their own

when they went 4-0 down within 37 minutes

of their fourth-round tie at the Madejski

Stadium. That they eventually ran out as 7-5

winners after extra time left observers

almost as bemused as Olivier Giroud and

Francis Coquelin – both of whom threw their

shirts into the crowd after the final whistle,

unaware that another 30 minutes had

to be played.

Wenger has listed the League Cup as fifth

on his list of priorities for this season, so

the likes of Andrei Arshavin and Marouane

Chamakh are likely to get another run-out

on Tuesday, along with youngsters Serge

Gnabry and Thomas Eisfeld.

Parkinson will hope Arsenal follow the

same kamikaze game plan that saw them

fall so far behind so fast at Reading.

Whichever Gunners side turns up, for

promotion hopefuls Bradford this is a

pressure-free tie with little to lose.

And that’s always dangerous.

The other fifth round fixtures:

Norwich v Aston Villa (Tuesday 7.45pm)

Swansea v Middlesbrough

(Wednesday 7.45pm)

Leeds v Chelsea

(Wednesday December 19 7.45pm)

Kids on parade

| 65

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SUNDAY ATHLETICS | EUROPEAN CROSS COUNTRY CHAMPIONSHIPS | BUDAPEST, HUNGARY BBC TWO 12PM

An event that played a sizeable role in

setting Mo Farah on his path to Olympic glory, the European Cross Country Championships

take place in Budapest this weekend, when the

Great Britain and Northern Ireland team will be

hoping to match their success of 2011.

In Slovenia one year ago, Britain topped the

overall medal table – winning a total of 12 medals,

six of them gold. Much of that success came in the

team events, although there was also individual

gold for Emma Pallant in the under-23 women

category and Emelia Gorecka in the junior women.

Gorecka (left) will defend her title in Budapest,

as well as lead the junior women’s team in their bid

to claim a seventh team gold in the age group in

eight years.

The senior women’s race at the GB trials was

won by Jess Coulson, but the 22-year-old will

compete in the under-23 category rather than the

seniors on Sunday, with a view to continuing GB’s

record of winning the category every year since

2006. Louise Damen, who finished third in the

trials, will lead the way for the senior women.

Andy Vernon, GB’s highest-placed senior male

athlete last year, finished second at the trials,

securing his spot despite still feeling his way back

to form after a stress fracture in his foot. He was

beaten by Jonathan Taylor, who will look to help the

GB men’s team at least match the silver medal they

won in 2011.

Young Brits seek

Euro glory

SATURDAY UFC | HENDERSON v DIAZ | KEYARENA, SEATTLE | ESPN 1AM

Tomorrow night sees the UFC bandwagon roll

into grunge and coffee capital Seattle, as UFC

lightweight champion Benson ‘Smooth’

Henderson (16 wins, 2 defeats) looks to serve up

a beating on title challenger Nate Diaz (16-7).

Henderson (right), an aggressive southpaw,

will look to use his wrestling skills and keep the

fight at close quarters against the rangier Diaz

– who has shown impressive boxing skills in his

recent bouts. The champion could have his hands

full because Diaz is a rough, tough character

who hails from the mean streets of Stockton

(California, not -on-Tees).

Henderson will want a resounding win to

cement his championship credentials, given

that his past two fights – both against former

champion Frankie Edgar – were close and

controversial decision victories. Expect this

one to follow a similar formula.

Rough with

the Smooth

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66 | December 7 2012 |

7 Days Heineken Cup

After picking up a losing bonus point at Castres in round

two,Jim Mallinder and Northampton now face an

unbeaten Ulster side – and the way in which Ulster’s

players fired up Ireland’s autumn fixtures won’t have

filled the Saints with joy. Young flyer Craig Gilroy is

the man of the moment, but it’s Ulster’s pack that

will be the major focus at Franklin’s Gardens. That’s

because the Saints rely heavily on their forward

power, and with Courtney Lawes (above) back in the

mix, it’s up front where they will look to strike. Ben

Foden’s return from injury should bolster a backline

that is always dangerous when featuring the Pisi

brothers, but the Saints may look to play a tight

game and rely on Ryan Lamb’s (inconsistent) boot to

inflict the Irish side’s first defeat of the campaign.

It’s hard to know how Ospreys

should approach the ever-

imposing visit to the Stade

Ernest-Wallon on Saturday

afternoon. While it’s tempting

to say keep it tight and rely on

the power up front to carry

them through, the Welsh side

have lost three tighthead

props in the space of a few

weeks – and their hosts are

hardly struggling in the pack,

with the likes of Thierry

Dusautoir (left) and Louis

Picamoles on their teamsheet.

In the backs, meanwhile, Dan

Biggar might be able to match

Luke McAlister in a kick-off,

but the French side boast

incredible power and pace

everywhere you look, and can

open you up in an instant.

A good start is essential but,

after defeat at Welford Road

in the last round, the Ospreys

will be delighted with a losing

bonus point here – and can then

look forward to the reverse

fixture at home next week.

Having been far below their brilliant best in the opening

rounds, Leinster face a huge two weeks against the

French giants – but we can expect them to respond.

Jonny Sexton (above) has been in fine form for

Ireland, and he’ll need to step up again in the absence

of that boy Brian. In Sean O’Brien and Jamie Heaslip,

they have the power and quality in the back row, but

Sexton is the key. The kind of defence shown against

Exeter in round one would be handy, too, because it’s

fair to say that a team containing Morgan Parra,

Wesley Fofana, Lee Byrne, Sitiveni Sivivatu and

Aurelien Rougerie know exactly how to score tries.

Everyone wrote off Munster after defeat to Racing

Metro in round one, but their hammering of Edinburgh

sees them back in the mix in this pool, and they’ll be

in no mood to lose at home. Simon Zebo, Keith Earls

and Denis Hurley have the pace to strike from

anywhere, but it’s the experience of Paul O’Connell,

Ronan O’Gara et al that makes this team so difficult

to beat. Sarries are top of the pool after two wins,

however, and will welcome back England’s in-form

full-back Alex Goode (above) for this big double-

header. Expect a tense, tight encounter that could

well be decided by the kickers.

FRIDAY POOL 4: NORTHAMPTON v ULSTER FRANKLIN’S GARDENS | SKY SPORTS 1 8PM

SATURDAY POOL 2: TOULOUSE v OSPREYS | STADE ERNEST-WALLON | SKY SPORTS 1 1.35PM

SUNDAY POOL 5: CLERMONT AUVERGNE v LEINSTER STADE MARCEL MICHELIN | SKY SPORTS 2 3PM

SATURDAY POOL 1: MUNSTER v SARACENS THOMOND PARK | SKY SPORTS 1 6PM

Sh

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Attention back on European unionNow those big mean bullies have returned to the southern hemisphere, our focus is back on club rugby – and a Heineken

Cup double-header over the next fortnight. Here are the tasty match-ups you can enjoy across Europe this weekend...

FRIDAY

Pool 3: Connacht v Biarritz,

Sky Sports Xtra (online) 8pm

Pool 4: Glasgow v Castres,

7.35pm

SATURDAY

Pool 5: Scarlets v Exeter,

Sky Sports 1 (red button)

1.35pm

Pool 3: Zebre v Harlequins,

1.35pm

Pool 2: Leicester v Treviso,

Sky Sports 1 (red button)

3.40pm

Pool 6: Sale v Toulon, Sky

Sports 1 3.40pm

Pool 1: Racing Metro 92 v

Edinburgh, Sky Sports 1

(red button), 6pm

SUNDAY

Pool 6: Cardiff Blues v

Montpellier, SS2 12.45pm

THE other games

The colours of teamwork.

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68 | December 7 2012 |

7 Days

SATURDAY HORSE RACING | SPORTINGBET TINGLE CREEK CHASE | SANDOWN | CHANNEL 4 3.05PM

FRIDAY

WINTER SPORT

Skeleton World

Cup, Winterberg,

Germany, British Eurosport 2 9am

GOLF Dubai Ladies Masters:

Day 3, Emirates Golf Club, Dubai,

Sky Sports 2 10.30am

FOOTBALL Championship:

Blackburn v Cardiff, Ewood Park,

Sky Sports 1 7.45pm

SATURDAY

WINTER SPORT Alpine Skiing

World Cup, St Moritz, Switzerland,

British Eurosport 10.15am

FOOTBALL SPL: Kilmarnock v

Celtic, Rugby Park, ESPN 11.45am

FOOTBALL Championship:

Wolves v Birmingham, Molineux,

Sky Sports 2 5.20pm

FOOTBALL La Liga: Valladolid v

Real Madrid, Estadio José Zorrilla,

Sky Sports 4 7pm

RUGBY UNION Amlin Challenge Cup:

Bayonne v London Wasps, Stade

Jean Dauger, Sky Sports 3 8pm

BOXING Brian Magee v Mikkel

Kessler, Herning, Denmark,

Sky Sports 1 8pm

SUNDAY

GOLF Nelson Mandela

Championship: Day 4,

Royal Durban Golf Club, Durban,

Sky Sports 3 11am

FOOTBALL SPL:

Dundee v Dundee Utd, Dens Park,

Sky Sports 4 12.45pm

NFL Washington Redskins v

Baltimore Ravens,

FedEx Field, Maryland,

Sky Sports 2 5.30pm

FOOTBALL La Liga: Betis v

Barcelona, Benito Villamarin,

Sky Sports 1 8pm

NFL New York Giants v New

Orleans Saints, MetLife Stadium,

New York, Sky Sports 2 9.15pm

MONDAY

WINTER SPORT European Curling

Championships, Karlstad, Sweden,

British Eurosport 8.30am

WEDNESDAY

SWIMMING World Championships

(25m) Day 1, Sinan Erdem Arena,

Istanbul, British Eurosport 8am

FUTSAL UEFA U21

Championship: Italy v Belarus,

St Petersburg, Russia,

British Eurosport 2 10.30am

THURSDAY

GOLF Alfred Dunhill Championship:

Day 1, Leopard Creek CC,

Malelane, South Africa,

Sky Sports 2 8.30am

FUTSAL UEFA U21 Championship:

Portugal v Ukraine,

St Petersburg, Russia,

British Eurosport 2 1pm

RUGBY UNION Amlin Challenge

Cup: London Wasps v Bayonne,

Adams Park, Sky Sports 1 7pm

GOLF The Royal Trophy: Day 1,

Empire Hotel and Country Club,

Brunei, ESPN 3am

BEST OF THE REST

Speed date

Not since the days of Moscow Flyer and

Azertyuiop has the two-mile chasing

division had a rivalry to genuinely capture

the imagination, to get the hairs on the

back of your neck standing up with pure

excitement. But that may all be about to

change, as this Saturday’s Tingle Creek

Chase at Sandown brings together the

two most exciting young chasers in horse

racing: Sprinter Sacre and Sanctuaire.

The two six-year-old French-breds

were foaled just three weeks apart in the

spring of 2006 – with Sprinter Sacre the

older of the two – but their respective

journeys to the top of the novice chasing

ranks last season were very different.

Sprinter Sacre (above) was switched to

fences after a brief but high-class career

over hurdles, his trainer Nicky Henderson

always convinced he would develop into

something very special over the bigger

obstacles. And he was right – Sprinter

won five from five over fences as

a novice, most notably soaring to a

breathtaking victory in the Arkle Chase at

Cheltenham in March. Henderson likens

him to a ‘big, black aeroplane’, such is his

combination of power and speed, while

regular pilot Barry Geraghty told this

very magazine that he is the best horse

he has ridden since... yes, Moscow Flyer.

By contrast, Sanctuaire (right) began

his career over fences as a horse that

had promised much but failed to deliver

over hurdles. A former Cheltenham

Festival winner, he was proving a

frustrating beast who either didn’t want

to start his races or pulled too hard if he

did get going. So trainer Paul Nicholls,

who knows something about training

top-class chasers, gave him a crack over

the bigger obstacles – and his charge

proved a revelation, displaying great

speed and an exuberant jumping style on

his way to three stunning wins in the new

year. The last two of those just happened

to be on the idiosyncratic Sandown

course – a track on which his big opponent

this weekend has never raced.

Such is the background to what

could prove a thrilling duel on Saturday.

Sprinter Sacre is the higher-rated horse

and will start favourite, but Nicholls has

won this race six times in the past seven

years (two wins each for Kauto Star,

Twist Magic and Master Minded) and will

have Sanctuaire fully wound up to put

Sprinter Sacre’s to-date impeccable

jumping under as much pressure as

possible. It could be a classic.

140Total winning distance, in

lengths, of Sprinter Sacre

and Sanctuaire’s eight

winning chase starts.

That’s an average of 17.5

lengths per race – which,

in horse racing terms, is

an absolute battering

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Goals, goals, goalsAdvertising Feature

As we approach Round Five of the Capital One Cup this week, we look at some of the greatest strikes in the competition’s history, and reflect on an incredible Round Four

| December 7 2012 | 71

Capital One, Official Credit Card of the Football League. For further details, see

Suddenly, the Capital One Cup has become synonymous with goals. Partly this is due to the

remarkable exploits we saw in the previous round,

when the two televised games – Reading v Arsenal

and Chelsea v Man Utd – saw a remarkable 21 goals

between them in 240 minutes. That’s a goal every

11 minutes!

Now, not every game is going to yield an average of

more than 10 goals (not even the Capital One Cup can

promise that), but it goes to show what a thrilling

competition we have on our hands this year. Already it

has seen an incredible 307 shots hit the back of the net.

And this isn’t a new phenomenon. The League Cup has

a history of great goals – and lots of them. They are the

moments that people remember and treasure. Below, we

take a look at our top five all-time League Cup goals, but

it’s not always the quality of the strike that makes a goal

great – sometimes it’s the context in which they come.

Take Theo Walcott’s goal for Arsenal in the last round

against Reading (the game that eventually finished 7-5

to the Gunners). When he scored his first, in injury time

at the end of the first half, Arsenal were 4-0 down and

staring humiliation in the face. Instead, they went in at

the break with a sliver of belief, and somehow turned

things around to force the match into extra time.

Arsenal now have a great opportunity to win the cup

this year. If they do go on to triumph in the final, they

might well look back at Walcott’s goal as the turning

point of their campaign.

So here’s to more goals in Round Five, the quarter

finals of this great competition that has really become

a credit to the game.

CAPITAL ONE CUP

ROUND FIVE DRAW

(all 7.45pm)

Tuesday, December 11

Bradford v Arsenal

Norwich v Aston Villa

Wednesday, December 12

Swansea v Middlesbrough

Wednesday, December 19

Leeds v Chelsea

What's your favourite League

Cup goal? #capitalonecup

facebook.com/capitaloneuk

1 Dennis Tueart

Man City v Newcastle, 1976

Voted the greatest League Cup moment

of the past 50 years, this goal sealed

victory for City in the ’76 final. And what

a goal. They don’t come any better than

spectacular overhead kicks, especially

in the last minute with the score at 1-1.

And with this, Tueart earned legendary

status in the blue half of Manchester.

2Chris Nicholl

Aston Villa v Everton, 1977

Nicholl was a big, old-fashioned centre

back, so it’s something of a surprise to

see him on this list. But this 40-yard

screamer (and it was exactly that, no

fluke about it whatsoever) drew Villa

level in this second final replay, before

they went on to win in extra time

thanks to a brace from Brian Little.

3Phil Jevons

Grimsby v Liverpool, 2001

Not only was this a sensational goal, but

for Grimsby fans it was a sensational

scalp, too. Liverpool, one of the most

famous teams in the world, were sent

packing thanks to this fabulous 35-yard

dipper from Jevons that left keeper

Chris Kirkland absolutely helpless. What

made it doubly sweet was that it came

in the last minute of extra time to seal a

famous win. Trebly sweet? Jevons was

a Liverpool fan.

4Didier Drogba

Chelsea v Tottenham, 2008

Drogba scored plenty of goals thanks to

his marauding centre forward style, but

this deftly placed free kick in the final

against Spurs in 2008 was an absolute

peach. Sadly for Blues fans, Spurs went

on to win the match 2-1, but that

doesn’t detract from the quality of this

strike, which bent around the wall and

into the bottom corner.

5Darren Ambrose

Crystal Palace v Man Utd 2011

Palace fans are still talking about this

amazing 35-yard strike that propelled

their team into the semi finals of last

year’s competition. Picking the ball

up just inside United’s half, Ambrose

unleashed a shot of such ferocity and

accuracy that TV pundit Gary Neville

asked if Old Trafford had ever seen

a goal of such quality from a player not

wearing red.

THE GREATEST LEAGUE CUP GOALS

1 2 3

4 5

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72 | December 7 2012 |

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74 | December 7 2012 |

Extra time Ludivine Sagna

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76 | December 7 2012 |

Flying solo

Planning a winter ski trip on your own?

No need to feel lonely – take your pick

from the following singles’ selection

Words by Hannah Engelkamp of MadDogSki, which has a website full of useful tools to help

you track down and make the most of your ski holiday. Check them out online at maddogski.com

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SOCIAL HEALINGThe Ski Club of Great Britain tailor

their Freshtracks holidays to your

skiing level, so you’ll be skiing with

other people of a similar standard

and adventurousness.

Many trips are suitable from early

intermediate level. Interestingly,

the Ski Club have recently upped

the number of single rooms without

a supplement — clearly, everyone

is doing it. A volunteer Ski Club

leader travels with you and sorts

everything out, including evening

NOT-SO-LONESOME COWBOYStay in the Lonesome Spur ranch in Montana with

just nine other people and no single supplement,

and ski the nearby Red Lodge Mountain Resort.

Everyone eats together and stays in log cabins, and

while on the ranch you can round up cattle, canter

horses through the snow, and relax in the hot tub or

in front of the log fire. There’s 25 per cent off this

holiday all season, and we’d suggest going for the

Winter Carnival in early March: live music, a torchlight

parade and a cardboard-and-duct-tape sledge race.

ranchrider.com

PUSH THE BOAT OUT... To Greenland, on an adventure that starts out from

the fishing and hunting town of Maniitsoq, flanked by

2,000m peaks on one side and sperm whales on the

other. The following eight days are spent sailing

through dramatic scenery, spotting humpback

whales, seabirds and icebergs at sea, and

11th-century houses and reindeer on land. Plus

there’s skiing in guided groups, or snowshoeing for

non-skiers. No single supplement, sociable digs in

the sailboat and lots to talk about – perfect.

anotherworldadventures.com

LOOKING FOR LOVELuz Ardiden in the Hautes-Pyrenees in France

is running a dedicated singles week from

January 20-25 2013, with a speed dating night,

ski instruction and nightclubs. Check out the

neo-classical spa with treatments involving

ginger, peppers and guarana.

Meanwhile, chalet company Powder White

has a singles week. Take along a single wingman/

woman to share your twin room, and enjoy the

equal numbers of single men and women, the

good food, wine and romantic mountain

ambience of Courchevel 1650.

pyrenees-holiday.com,

powderwhite.com/winterbreaks

and — when necessary — bad-weather

activities. They ski with you, too,

which is a great way to be introduced

to a new mountain.

There’s a giant range of holidays,

resorts and countries available,

but here’s an example: take a

‘Technique Top-up’ week in

Courmayeur, Italy. As well as the

leaders, you’ll have instruction on two

days, chalet and meals, travel, and

20 per cent off lift passes.

skiclub.co.uk

Extra time Winter sports

East London Design Show

If you’re searching for innovative Christmas gift

ideas to help you avoid buying Phil Tufnell: Hit in

the Googlies! on DVD for your dad for the fifth

year running, this could be the solution. With 100

designers selling men’s and women’s fashion,

artwork, children’s toys and more, the East

London Design Show offers items you won’t find

in the Argos catalogue, while being that bit

sleeker and swisher than your usual craft fair

nonsense. Open now at Shoreditch (where else?)

Town Hall, entry is £5 and the final day is Sunday.

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The Man with the Iron FistsIf you, like us, were raised on the

warm milk of the Wu Tang Clan’s

nursery rhymes, you’ll be overjoyed

at this: Wu-leader RZA directing,

writing and acting in a kung-fu film

about... well, the title is a giveaway.

Set in 19th-century China, starring

Lucy Liu, Russell Crowe and with

input from Quentin Tarantino, this is

a hokey, madcap pastiche/homage

to Asian martial arts films. The fight

scenes are bombastically

exhausting and the plot barking

mad, leading critics to call it the

best bad film of 2012. Hardly a

glowing tribute, but Mr Iron Fists

has delivered pure gold in one area.

RZA’s score is a glorious, ominous,

toe-tapping masterpiece. Just shut

your eyes and bask in the genius

(no, that’s not a quote from the

film’s marketing posters). Out now.

The Expendables 2

The cast may be older

than The Rolling Stones

and the Italian national

football team combined,

but there’s some creaky

action fun to be had in

Sly Stallone’s explosion-

filled romp. He might be

annoyed that his old pal

Arnold Schwarzenegger

steals the best lines and

most of the scenes he’s

in, mind. Out on Monday.

The Hobbit: An Unexpected Journey Howard Shore

No matter what reviews

greet next week’s film

release, we can be sure

of a stirring soundtrack.

Recorded by the London

Philharmonic Orchestra,

Howard Shore’s score

mixes epic new material

with a few Lord of the

Rings motifs. Listen and

set free your inner elf/

dwarf/hobbit (probably

not on the Tube, though).

Gremlins

It’s 28 years since this lovable horror-comedy

first hit the big screen, which seems like an odd

anniversary for a cinema rerelease. It is one of the

great Christmas movies, however, so we’re not

complaining. It made mogwai Gizmo a cutesy 1980s

icon, but the entertainment really begins when his

evil brothers tear up US every-town Kingston

Falls, vandalising cinemas and booby-trapping Mrs

Deagle’s stairlift. If there’s a message to take, it’s

that breaking ‘the rules’ leads to much fun (also

applies to office Christmas parties. Probably).

¡TRÉ! Green Day

At an age when most rock bands are releasing an

album every two and a half years, we can only

admire Green Day’s frenetic productivity. Following

¡Uno!‘s punk-pop and the garage rawk of ¡Dos!, this

last album sees the boys try everything from soul to

ska-core. There’s as much miss

as there is hit on the trilogy, but

the slapdash nature is part of

the appeal – and judicious cherry

picking means you can craft a

killer playlist (X-Kid is our top

pick from this one). Out Monday.

78 | December 7 2012 |

FILM

Perfect score

Cracking film soundtracks, gremlins

wreck a stairlift, while Arnie and Sly

prove they can still walk the walk

FILM

EVENT DVDMUSIC

MUSIC

Extra time Entertainment

See Olympic Silver medallists Fred Evans & John Joe Nevin with their British Lionhearts teammates take on the German Eagles. ENTERTAINMENT by DJ Spoony

BOOK NOW BY CALLING: 0870 903 9033

OR VISIT WWW.BRITISHLIONHEARTS.COM

DOORS-6PM, BOXING-8PM | Tickets from £20!

AT EARLS COURT14 DECEMBER 2012

BRITISH LIONHEARTS german eaglesVS

hugoboss.com

“I DON’T EXPECT SUCCESS

I PREPARE FOR IT”

RYAN REYNOLDS

BOSS BOTTLED.

FRAGRANCE FOR MEN

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