STRATEGIES FOR KEEPING OUR CHILDREN SAFE FROM BULLYING/CYBERBULLYING

Safe and Drug Free Schools January 24, 2011

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Look around you…

Why Stop Bullying?

An estimated 160,000 students miss school every day due to

fear of attack or intimidation by other

students

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Times Have Changed…

Video: “Wally’s Surprise Phone Call”

Millennial Generation Takes Multitasking to a New Level…

91% have an email address 60%have an IM screen name 73% have their own cell phones 72% have a profile on a social networking

site

Cox Communications Teen Online&Wireless Safety Survey (2009)

Adolescents and the Internet

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Teens average 10.45 hours of media content per dayMusic/audioVideo OnlineTV contentMoviesPrint

Teen Media Use Over Time

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Average Monthly Teen Texts?

3,146 text messages per month

Neilson 2009SDFS – 10/10

Bullying vs Cyberbullying

Terms have expanded Regardless of location, it’s all bullying Same dynamics Different delivery system It’s All about power All bullying is damaging It can be stopped with a cooperation and

a concerted effort

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A willful act or course of conduct on the part of one or more pupils which is not authorized by law and which exposes a pupil repeatedly and over time to one or more negative actions which is highly offensive to a reasonable person and is intended to cause and actually causes the pupil to suffer harm or serious emotional distress.

Bullying Defined

Bullying is NOT… A normal childhood

activity

A rite of passage

The target’s fault

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Bullying Happens in Four Ways

VerbalTeasing, jokes, ignoring/isolation, gossip, threats

PhysicalBlocking someone’s path, physical restraint,pushing/kicking, hazing

SexualTeasing, touching, slapping, pictures,

emails,graffiti, sexual assault Property

Hiding belongings, theft, arson, extortion, vandalism, destruction

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Cyberbullying is when a child, preteen or teen is tormented, threatened, harassed, humiliated, embarrassed or otherwise targeted by another child, preteen or teen using the Internet, interactive and digital technologies or mobile phones.

Stop Cyberbullying Now. org

Definition of Cyberbullying

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Bullying using technology

Student Definition

• It has to have a minor on both sides, or at least have been instigated by a minor against another minor.

• Once adults become involved, it is cyber- harassment or cyberstalking.

• Adult cyber-harassment or cyberstalking is NEVER called cyberbullying.

Conditions of Cyberbullying

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Cyberbullying: Breaking It Down

Cyber Bullying can take many forms. These are a few:

• A threatening e-mail• Nasty instant messaging session• Repeated notes sent to the cell phone• A website set up to mock others• Borrowing someone’s screen name and pretending

to be them while posting a message.• Forwarding supposedly private messages, pictures, or video to others.

I –SAFE America Inc.SDFS – 10/10

Getting someone else to do the dirty work

Warning WarsPosing as victimControl of a victim’s accountReporting a victim to a website- lose their accessEndangering the victim

through posts

Cyberbullying by Proxy

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• Disclosing Personal Information

• Internet Addiction

• Suicide and Self-harm Communities

• Hate Group Recruitment and Gangs

• Risky Sexual Behavior

• Violent Gaming

High Risk Behaviors Online

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Griefers Dead Tree Version Biobreak Legacy media Meatspace Cornea-Gumbo Double-Geeking Fram Typo-Squatting Leet-Speek 1-3-3-7

• DBEYR• IRL• OIC• ROTFLMAO• 420• ASL• CD9• KPC• LMIRL• POS

netlingo.com

Do You Know….Netlingo?

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BULLYING

• DIRECT

• Occurs on school property

• Poor relationships with teachers

• Fear retribution

CYBERBULLYING

• ANONYMOUS

• Occurs offschool property

• Good relationships with teachers

• Fear loss of technology privileges

• Further under the radar than bullying

From ‘Demystifying and Deescalating Cyber Bullying’ by Barbara Trolley, Ph.D. CRC, Connie Hanel, M.S.E.d & Linda Shields, M.S.E.d. http://www.nyssca.org/CYBERBULLYING-pp-BT28th.ppt

DIFFERENCES

Cyberbullying Prevalance

According to the National Crime Prevention Council :

• 43% of children 13-17 report being cyberbullied in the last year

• Most victims "know" but cannot see the bully

• 53% of teens admit sending a nastygram

• Only 10% of victims told their parents

Common Sense Media, 2010

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Explaining Bullying/Cyberbullying

Behavior

• Attention & Approval• Reputation• Anger• Power • Control• Entertainment• Status

• Jealousy• Boredom• From example

Why Do Kids Bully?

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When teens were asked why they cyber bullied, they responded:

They think it’s funny (81%) They don’t think it’s a big deal They are encouraged by friends

They think everybody cyber bullies They think they won’t get caught

They don’t think about the consequenceswww.cyberbullying.us

Words Do Hurt

Bullies like what they do

most of them have strong self-confidence

So, if we tell the whole student body to be

nice, the bullies won’t listen

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“You can’t see me, I can’t see you”

“Life online is just a game”

“Look at me—I’m a star”

“It’s not me. It’s my online persona”

“What happens online stays online”

“On the Internet, I have the free-speech right to write or post anything I want, regardless of the harm it might cause

to another”

What Are They Thinking?

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FOR THE TARGET, BULLYING IS A “LOSS” EXPERIENCE:

LOSS of safety

LOSS of self-esteem

LOSS of belonging

LOSS of control over their life

Health Problems• Loss of appetite• Nervousness• Frequent trips to the nurse• Stomach aches, vomiting• Depression• Headaches• Loss of sleep

Effects of Bullying on Victims

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Adjustment Problems• Emotional distress• Anxiety• Depression• Lowered self-esteem• Homicidal ideation and attempts• Suicidal ideation and attempts• Loneliness

Effects of Bullying on Victims

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Academic Problems

• School avoidance, truancy• Lowered grades and reduced learning• Diminished academic risk-taking

Effects of Bullying on Victims

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5 minutes

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The Good News:

85% of children are not bullies

85% of kids are not bullies and can be enlisted to STOP THE BULLYING

Encourage Reporting of Bullying

Why Kids Don’t tell…

Reporting bullying to parents: Children frequently do not tell their

parents that they are being bullied because they are embarrassed, ashamed, frightened of the children who are bullying them, or afraid of being seen as a “tattler.” If your child tells you about being bullied, it has taken a lot of courage to do so.

Your child needs your help to stop the bullying.

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Why Older Kids Won’t Report Bullying

IncidentsMajority of incidents go unreported

Children fear loss of technology so they do not report to parents or adults

Fear of retaliation/making situation worse

Most reports come through concerned friends

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A Each time the Internet is accessed, an IP (Internet Protocol) address, a type of electronic fingerprint, is established. This IP address can be used by the authorities to trace all electronic communication between computers and/or mobile phones.

Postings in cyberspace are traceable, downloadable, printable, and sometimes punishable by law.

Cyberstalking is a crime!!

From wiredsafety.org

Cyberbullies Can be Traced

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Where to Start

1.Communicate your values – and how they apply online: You’re the only one in a position to guide your kids this way. Be very clear with kids about this. It’ll help them make smarter decisions when they’re faced with tricky situations.

2.Be patient: Most kids need small bits of information repeated – and often – for it to really sink in. Keep talking; chances are it’ll pay off.

Net Cetera 2010

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Plan of Action for Families

Have family discussions where every member’s opinion is respected

Reassure children that it is OK to tell you without fear of reprisals

Develop Family Media Usage Guidelines

Develop Family Pledge

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Support Targets ∙ Mentor them and connect with them.

∙ Increase supervision to protect them.

∙ Help them get support from others with similar histories.

∙ And — most importantly — help them connect with a network of peer support and friendship.

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STOP: Don’t respond to the bully.

BLOCK: The bully or limit all communication to those you can trust.

TELL: A trusted adult.

Teach children to:

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Let’s Look At Some Internet Safety Resources

LINK