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THE FACTUALLY INACCURATE TABLOID OF WASHINGTON UNIVERSITY IN D.C. SINCE 1878 MONDAY, APRIL 2, 2007 WWW.STUDDEATH.COM STUDENT LIBEL HIGH SPEED CHASE TEARS ACROSS CAMPUS MILLIONS OF POINTS STOLEN FROM BEAR’S DEN THURTENE NAMES SU AS ‘07 CHARITY Says Thurtene chair: ‘We felt bad when they ran out of money’ SQUIRREL MAULS HAWK SNAKES ON THE 40 Hundreds of students attacked in freak serpentine infestation DEAN SANSALONE CUTS OWN JOB Full story, page 2 Cashiers held at gunpoint in four-hour standoff MOINESTER CLUBS BABY SEAL Moinester speaks out: ‘They may be cute, but they’re also tasty’ STUDENT LIBEL EXCLUSIVE: WRIGHTON, PATTY MAYONNAISE LOVE AFFAIR SCANDAL
